A Different Road
by Avengesuperwholock
Summary: AU: For almost a year, Sam and Dean have been separated, ever since the Mark of Cain and First Blade made Dean go nearly demonic. But when Sam finds out his brother is in trouble and rushes to the rescue, he's in for quite a surprise. Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or any characters besides my OCs. Please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

_This is the story of Sam and Dean Winchester, after the events of seasons one through nine. Only one thing has changed; Dean was not killed by Metatron at the end of season nine. Instead, under the influence of the First Blade and the Mark of Cain, Dean beat and tortured his enemy until Sam arrived to see his brother about to kill the angel, his eyes black as any demon's. Sam managed to get Dean not to kill the angel, and Castiel was able to put Metatron safe behind bars in heaven. However, Dean was so far gone from humanity because of the evil in him that Cas and even his own brother could not bear to be around him anymore. Dean was left alone by the only two people he had left, and he was able to give Crowley the Blade to stop himself from getting any worse. Dean Winchester continued to hunt on his own, but he was unstable and almost wanting to die. Cas and Sam have been hunting both together and apart since then, and Castiel has been struggling to piece heaven back together as well as deal with his constantly waning stolen grace. While Sam still checks up every once in a while on his brother to make sure he's not dead, the two Winchester brothers have not seen each other in nine months._

_However, that is all about to change._

* * *

><p>Castiel dug furiously through heaps of towels and cast-off clothes, searching for the ringing phone buried underneath. Sam had made him buy a cell phone so they could communicate better, but Cas constantly struggled with finding the small black rectangle that apparently had so much power. On top of that, it was humiliating. What pathetic kind of angel had to use human electronics to communicate?<p>

Well, he did. Sam hated it when Cas would just appear and disappear at will as angels often do. He would much rather talk over the phone. However, his friend needn't worry. Castiel was struggling more and more to complete simple angelic tasks like that with his stolen grace waning yet again. Resisting the urge to swear angrily like he had often heard Dean do, Cas finally dug out the phone and answered, almost more to stop the irritating ringing than speak to Sam Winchester.

"Took you long enough, Cas," Sam snapped on the other end. He sounded worried and agitated, and Cas instantly forgot about his own struggles.

"Is something wrong, Sam?" he asked, concerned.

"Well..." Sam sighed. "I'm in some deep shit, Cas. I'm somewhere in Illinois, and I've got some pretty powerful demons on my tail. I fought them a state or so back, and I've got a pretty good head start on them, but Cas, I didn't even manage to kill one! I'm slipping."

"Do you need assistance?" Cas reached inside him, hoping to find enough power to teleport to Sam's side. However, he was completely drained, and he would have to wait until Hannah, his lieutenant, arrived with a bit of grace to tide him over. His loyal followers had been regularly sapping bits of their power to keep their leader alive. However, it could be hours, maybe even a day, before Hannah returned, and this system would not work much longer. He needed a long time solution, but it sounded as if Sam had enough problems already.

"I'm alright, Cas," the youngest Winchester sighed. "I just...it's not me these demons are after. I happened to run into them, but they're headed for a hunter who is currently residing in Illinois."

"What hunters do we know are living in Illinois?" Castiel asked, thinking hard. "The only one I know of is...no."

"I'm afraid so, Cas," Sam said quietly. "I'm headed to his place now, to warn him."

"Sam, are you sure that's a good idea? We have no idea what he's like! It's been _nine months _since we last saw him."

"Cas, I can't just leave him undefended," Sam sighed across the phone. "I'm not even an hour from his place."

"I can try and get to you," Castiel offered.

"Cas, you're already weak," his friend said. "Worry about yourself for now. I'll call once we're okay."

"Sam...just be careful, okay?"

"I will."

"And, well...say hi to your brother for me."

The phone clicked dead.

* * *

><p>Sam was nervous.<p>

It was funny. He had faced armies of angels, demons, vampires, werewolves, shape shifters, wendigos, djinns, and countless other monsters. He didn't get nervous before hunts anymore, they were natural as breathing to him. Something that wasn't natural to him? Not being with Dean.

God, these past nine months had been hell. Any time something funny happened, or when Sam needed somebody to help him out, he would turn to Dean...and he wouldn't be there. It was almost worse than when Dean was dead. When Dean was dead, Sam had one mission: get him back. But now, now Dean was still here, alive, walking the same earth as Sam was, there for him to go to... but he was choosing not to. And it was all kinds of awful. He missed his big brother so much, missed driving all day in a car to the same five albums non-stop. He missed the nights at bars, watching Dean hitting on anything female that moved. He missed his brother's sarcastic, juvenile sense of humor, missed arguing and teasing each other, missed working together, missed the thrill of a hunt with a brother by your side. Cas was great and all, a good friend and always valuable on a hunt, but he could never be Dean.

But now, now that he sat parked outside a cute little two-story home with a neat lawn and a nice paint job, he was crazy nervous. He would never have believed this was where Dean was living if it weren't for the familiar, beloved black Impala parked in the driveway. That car put a lump in Sam's throat, bringing back memories of intense arguments driving down a moonlit highway, or songs from before they were born being belted off-key by two brothers, or just sitting on the hood, beers in hand, looking up at the stars. Dean was there, inside that house, Sam knew for sure. If he knew anything about his brother, it was that Dean Winchester would never leave that car behind.

Sam got out of the car and walked up to the front door, heart pounding. He didn't have long to get in there and warn Dean about the incoming demons, but his brain was screaming at him not to go in there. Who knew what awaited him? Sure, Dean sounded normal on the phone. But Sam still carried that vision of Dean, bloody Blade in hand, his face twisted into a mask of cruel hatred and fierce enjoyment, eyes black as night. Demonic. If that was the Dean that awaited him inside this cute little house...that would be worse than any demons on his tail.

It was a little after two in the morning, and the house was silent. The whole cute little neighborhood was silent, actually. Sam couldn't wrap his head around the fact that his badass big brother lived _here._ Sam picked the lock pretty easily and slipped into the house through the front door, shutting it quietly behind him.

From little shafts of moonlight peeking through cracks in the shades, Sam could make out the general layout of the first floor. He walked through a nice living room, past a bookshelf (Dean reading?), then past a nice island bar (now that was more like Dean), to the wooden staircase. The house wasn't overly furnished or decorated, but it was nice. Simple and elegant, color-coordinated, neat. Not at all like Sam would have envisioned Dean's house. In fact, Sam was starting to wonder if Dean was even here.

Then something leapt on top of him from behind, sending him toppling to the ground.

Sam grunted in pain as his head smacked against the wooden floor, stunning him for a few moments. There was a weight on his back, not as heavy as Dean. It was too light to be a full-grown man, and judging by the leg that had him trapped in a headlock, a slender, smooth, pale leg, this was definitely a woman. Sam should have been able to throw her off, even with the element of surprise she had on him, but this woman knew what she was doing. She had her weight expertly balanced on him to pin him down, and on top of that, Sam felt a cold circle of metal worm its way to the base of his skull. A gun. His heart was beating hard, his mind racing, his blood cold. Whatever he was expecting, it was not this.

"Who are you and what the hell are you doing in our house?" the woman snarled. Her voice was cold and dangerous, not betraying even a tremor of fear.

Sam was thinking hard. How to explain this? "Look, I think there's been some kind of mistake..." he tried, desperately trying to reason with whoever this was that had him held at gunpoint, defenseless and unable to fight back.

The ominous click of a gun being loaded reverberated through Sam. "I _said, _who are you and what the hell are you doing in our house?" this terrifying woman asked in an even colder, slower voice.

Sam was running out of ideas. He was starting to think how pathetic it would be, for this to be how his life ended, when a voice, low and husky and thick from sleep called from the top of the stairs, "The hell is going on down there?"

Sam's heart literally skipped a beat. Then he found his voice. "Dean?!" he cried, half relieved and half terrified.

There was a moment of silence, and then the familiar voice, the one Sam would know anywhere, cried, "Sam? Is that you?!"

Despite himself, Sam found himself laughing in relief. So this wasn't the wrong place. The woman pinning Sam down gasped, and the gun was withdrawn from his head. A second later her weight was gone, and he heard her speaking in an entirely different voice, a concerned, apologetic one, "Oh my god, you're Sam Winchester? His brother? Oh, god, I am so sorry-I had no idea..."

Sam picked himself up off the ground while the woman hovered nearby apologetically, seemingly wanting to help but unsure if she should. Sam ran a hand through his hair. "It's fine, don't worry about it," he sighed. "It's..."

His voice trailed off as he finally saw the woman who had taken him down. She stood in a patch of moonlight, wearing a lacy tank top and shorts and nothing else. And she was beautiful. Five six or so, slender but in a lean, fit sort of way, fair-skinned, with no shortage of curves, made all too apparent by her skimpy clothes. She had gentle blond curls that glowed almost silvery in the moonlight down to her shoulders, and they were wild and unbrushed. She had a pretty face, open and kind, with big, gorgeous blue eyes, and she wore no makeup. She must have woken up as he broke into the house and slipped down the stairs and somehow gotten the jump on him, a Winchester. She was good. And...she was disarmingly pretty.

Sam averted his eyes, trying not to realize how close and barely-dressed she was. "It's fine," he muttered again.

Thankfully, in that moment, Dean reached the bottom of the stairs, providing a welcome distraction. Sam looked up and, to use a cliché he hated, saw tunnel vision. All of the sudden, his brother was all that mattered, all that existed.

Dean looked good. Like, really good. Nothing like the messed-up guy Sam had left months ago, a pale, worn, dead-eyed, violent, borderline-psychotic guy. His brother looked almost younger, as if he had aged backwards. His face looked less lined, and tanner. His eyes, a bright green, had a light in them once again, and he was more clean-shaven than he had been the last time Sam had seen him. Dean was wearing only a white t-shirt and boxers, so Sam could tell that Dean was in even better shape than he had been before. Dean had always been built athletically, tall and broad-shouldered and muscular, but the muscles in his arms and chest were larger and more defined. He had been working out, and getting some sun, too. The circles under his eyes were all but gone. He had clearly been sleeping before the noise downstairs woke him. He looked...well, he looked better than he had in years. Sam had not been expecting such a healthy-looking Dean, full of life once more.

Dean had eyes only for his little brother as well. They were shiny in the moonlight, probably with tears. "Sam...?" Dean asked in almost-disbelief. It physically hurt Sam, the disbelief and shock in his brother's expression. Dean could not believe that Sam had returned, that Sam wanted to see him again. Why had Sam left his brother again? _How?_

"Hey, Dean," Sam said quietly, and just like that the tension between them, the uncertainty and pent-up hurt and anger and pain and angst dissipated. Dean's face broke into a grin, and then the two brothers crossed the floor in a couple of steps and embraced. Actually, Dean embraced Sam at first, while the younger brother hesitated, unsure if he should dare try to hug his brother. But Dean didn't seem angry, just overjoyed to see Sam. The feeling of Dean's arms around Sam was so familiar, so reassuring even after all this time, that Sam couldn't stop the lump that built in his throat or his arms from going around Dean. They hugged each other so tightly Sam wasn't entirely sure he was still breathing. Over Dean's shoulder, Sam saw the woman smiling at them, looking as if she might cry.

Sam pulled away first, and the brothers quickly composed themselves. "Sam, it's...it's good to see you," Dean said with a smile.

"Yeah, it's...it's good to see you too, Dean," Sam replied. Why was his throat so tight? Why couldn't he stop smiling?

"I didn't know you were coming," Dean said. "Otherwise I would have been, well...dressed at least."

The blond woman laughed, and Sam glanced over at her again. Dean followed his gaze, and Sam watched as his brother's face literally lit up. "Oh, right. I should introduce you two," the elder Winchester smiled. "Sam, this is Julie Carters. Jules, this is Sam."

Julie Carters stuck out a hand to shake Sam's. "It's a pleasure to meet you," she said in a warm voice. She had a pretty smile. "Dean has told me a lot about you and it's...it's good to finally meet you."

"All good things, I hope?" Sam asked with a nervous laugh. How could he expect his brother to have anything good to say about him after abandoning Dean to deal with his problems alone?

Dean laughed. "Of course. I wouldn't turn my girlfriend against you before she even met you!"

Sam blinked. He guessed he had known ever since he saw a beautiful woman in her pajamas in Dean's house that something was going on, but the thought of Dean having a steady girlfriend...it was crazy. "So...she's your.." Sam said slowly.

"My girlfriend? Yeah," Dean laughed, putting an arm around her shoulders. "What did you think she was, my nanny?"

"You could use one," Julie laughed, leaning into him. Sam stared at the grins on their faces, the ease at which they interacted, how they seemed to gravitate towards each other. It was mind-boggling for him.

Dean seemed to realize for the first time that Julie was in a tank top, shorts, and nothing else. "Oh. Uh, Jules, why don't you, uh-"

"Put some clothes on?" she laughed. "Yeah, I will. I'll be right back. Meanwhile, you should find out why Sam had to break into our house in the middle of the night and almost get himself killed." She shot Sam a grin over her shoulder before disappearing up the stairs.

Sam stared after her, and then gave a low whistle. "Wow."

"I know," Dean sighed. "She's amazing. Still not sure how I got her."

"You deserve somebody like her, Dean," Sam said quietly. Dean didn't reply for a moment, unable to accept that he was worth the love of someone like her in his true Dean Winchester fashion. Then he turned to Sam and prompted, "So why _did_ you feel the need to break in here in the middle of the night?"

That was right. He was here to warn Dean, not just reunite with his brother. Sam took a deep breath and launched into a quick explanation of the incoming threat.

By the end of Sam's explanation, Dean had already reached into a cupboard in the pantry and pulled out two huge bags of salt. He tossed one to Sam, who caught it, gasping a little as the heavy bag knocked the wind out of him. "Well, Sammy, come on!" Dean said. "We don't have much time, and we've got work to do."

Sam shook his head in wonder. Where was the broken, twisted Dean he had imagined for the past nine months? How had he gotten to this level of stability? How was he...well, Dean?

The answer appeared a couple minutes later, as they finished salting the place. She had gotten dressed and brushed her curls. They now framed her face in pretty blond spirals, curling gently against the collar of a tan hunting jacket she wore over a dark t-shirt and jeans. Julie Carter's combat boots thudded as she skipped the last two steps of the stairs. She walked over to the two brothers, depositing a duffel bag full of knives and guns at their feet. She said in a down-to-earth tone, "Well, boys. I see you salted the place, and we have devil's traps under every rug at every door. We should be set. Now...what brought you here, Sam? What is hunting us?"

Sam blinked. Then he slowly turned towards his brother, anger building in him. "You...you told her?"

Dean winced. "Sam..."

"I can't believe you! You told her about hunting? Dean, you've got to be kidding me!"

"Sam, just listen to me-"

"No, Dean! See, this is why I can't trust you; you can't even keep one secret! I never told Jessica, in all the years we were together, but you feel the need to tell every girl you sleep more than once with that we hunt monsters in our spare time? No, Dean. I can't do this. I'm so tired of you-"

Sam didn't know how it happened, but he found himself once again on his stomach on the cold, hard floor, with a knee pressed into his back and a hand pressing his face down. "Okay, Sammy," he heard Julie say from on top of him. Again. "Listen up. Your brother did not tell me he was a hunter. He did not tell me about hunting at all. Now, going off of that and the fact that this is the second time in the ten minutes I've known you I've put you on the floor, and you're supposed to be one of the greatest hunters alive, what does that make me?" Sam mentally kicked himself. Of course. "Come on, Sammy," she teased him. "Dean tells me you're pretty sharp. Put it together."

"You're a hunter, too," he sighed.

"And we have a winner!" Julie was off of him in an instant, and this time she felt comfortable enough with him to grab his arm and help him up. She was grinning, but not in a malicious way. Her eyes were teasing, but her smile was genuine. Behind her, Dean was trying not to laugh.

"Hope I didn't hurt you too much," his brother's hot, kickass hunter girlfriend smirked.

"You didn't hurt anything, just my pride," he muttered. She laughed. Sam looked at her, and felt a little swell of pride and something else. He had made her laugh. He couldn't help but smile, and Julie grinned back. "One more thing," he said, braver now.

"Yeah?"

"Don't call me Sammy," Sam said. "Only he gets to call me that."

"Point taken," Julie said respectfully. Sam looked over and saw Dean really, truly smiling.

"Dean, Sam and I can guard the house fine on our own," Julie said, surprising them. "Why don't you go get dressed and meet us back here?"

"Good idea," Dean smirked. He leaned down and kissed Julie before going upstairs. That kiss made Sam stare. It wasn't a long, lingering, making-out kind of kiss. It was the kiss your father gave your mother before going to work. A short, sweet kiss, a little expression of love.

Dean was in love. That thought finally hit Sam, like a ton of bricks. That was how his brother wasn't a wreck. He was in _love._

There was a brief pause as Sam processed this. "Sorry about taking you down the first time," Julie said lightly.

Sam decided to try and wrap his head around the idea of Dean in love later. He smirked. "Only the first time?"

Julie laughed. "Yeah, well, the second time you deserved it. You wouldn't shut up long enough to let Dean explain, so..."

"So you judo-flipped me onto the floor. Again."

"Pretty much." They both chuckled a little, and then stood in silence. Sam didn't know this woman, and he had no idea what to talk about. They had two things in common: hunting, and Dean. He could talk about the demons hunting them with her, but everything in him was begging for answers. How was Dean? How had he been in all this time apart? How did they meet, how long had they been together, how did _Dean Winchester _settle down with a girl?!

"So, uh...you and Dean, huh?" Sam tried lamely.

Julie smiled a little. "Yeah, me and Dean. I hope...I hope it's not weird for you. I know it's been a while since either of you have really settled down with somebody..."

"It's not weird," Sam assured her. "And...yeah, I guess it has. So...he's told you a lot then, huh? About us about our pasts?"

"Everything," she replied. Sam couldn't stop a quick expression of disbelief from showing on his face. Dean wasn't really the touchy-feely type. He didn't talk about the past, or how he felt. He acted tough and pushed on and buried his pain in beer and hunts and one-night stands.

"I know you probably don't believe me when I say he told me everything, but he did," Julie said after a moment. "Sam...when you left Dean, and I'm not saying I don't get why you left, because he told me that, too, and he firmly believed you did the right thing...but when you and Castiel left your brother, it destroyed him. He had given up the Blade and was hunting alone when I met him, about three months after the fact, and he was a mess. A self-hating, borderline-suicidal mess who buried himself in hunts so he didn't have to think. Or feel."

Sam wanted to tell her to shut up. Never mind. He didn't want to hear what Sam's abandonment had done to Dean. He just wanted to be happy that Dean was okay now. "What...what happened?" Sam asked quietly. "What changed?"

"Well." She hesitated. "When I met him...it was on a hunt. A demon had me pinned, and it was about to cut my throat, and he killed it."

Despite himself, Sam smiled. "That's Dean alright."

"Yeah," she smiled slightly, lost in thought. "My uncle and cousin and I, we let him stay with us for a bit. He went on another hunt with us, and in the process, he took a crazy risk. Used himself as bait when he didn't have to. Could have died. _Should _have died. Got his arm cut pretty bad before I killed the werewolf about to eat his heart out. He didn't need to take that risk, and that's when I realized...he almost wanted to die."

Sam's blood ran cold. If Dean hadn't been fortunate enough to find this girl, if she hadn't saved him... what would have happened to his brother? Sam knew the answer. He would have destroyed himself.

"So, that night, while I was stitching Dean up...I got on him. About being reckless, about trying to get himself killed. I asked him what could possibly make him think that he didn't deserve to live, and then...he told me."

"Told you what?"

"Everything. Who he was, although I had already guessed that, and everything that's happened to you guys over the past few years. He told me about the Mark and the Blade and you and Castiel leaving him and how he gave up the Blade and just wandered around, killing things and waiting to be killed, and then..."

"And then?" Sam prompted.

"I comforted him. He told me how tired he was of being alone. And then...we kissed."

Sam blinked. "Wait. So you're telling me he told you all this _before _he slept with you?"

Julie smiled a little. "Uh, yeah."

"Wow. He must have really loved you."

Julie was the shocked one this time. "Oh, no. I don't think he loved me yet." Sam smiled knowingly. "Or at least, he didn't realize it yet. It was another couple days before we even...you know..."

"Before you even what?" Sam asked, all wide-eyed innocence.

"Before we had sex, okay?" she snapped. He laughed, and she punched his shoulder lightly. "Shut up. Anyway, we stayed with my family a few more days, and then we hunted together, and then we settled down here."

"How long has it been?" Sam asked.

"Over four months we've been living here," she said.

"Wow." Sam looked around at this house, trying to imagine Dean living here, coming home from work to kiss his beautiful girlfriend like on an old black-and-white family TV show. It was mind-boggling. Sam was reminded strongly of Dean's time with Lisa and Ben, but this Julie was nothing like Lisa. Well, she was pretty, and female, but that was where the similarities ended. "He must really love you," Sam said slowly, trying to wrap his mind around the idea once more.

Julie smiled a little. Before she could reply, Dean reappeared, saying, "Are you guys talking about me behind my back?"

"I was just agreeing with Sam on how you take longer to get ready than I do," Julie smirked.

"One of us has to look beautiful," he fired back, grabbing Julie's waist and pulling her in so he could kiss her, long enough for Sam to feel awkward standing there. When the happy couple finally pulled apart, Sam felt comfortable looking at them again. Dean was decked out in his leather jacket over a dark button-down shirt, old, dark jeans, and his good old combat boots. He looked like his old hunter self, shedding this settled-down Dean as easily as a change of clothes. "Alright, Sam. I'm assuming the demons didn't arrive while I was getting dressed?" Sam raised an eyebrow and looked around at the quiet, almost peaceful house around them. "Well then, I say we get out of here."

"What?" Sam asked, confused.

"Well, Sam, this is kind of our home," Julie said. "And we really don't want it trashed in a fight against some demons. And, more importantly...we have friends around here. They're just people, and they would have no way to defend themselves if demons came to town."

Sam felt awful for not thinking of the innocent civilians around them. "Right. Okay. Well then, let's get out of here, try to draw them away from-"

The windows rattled as a fierce wind blew all around the house. Dark smoke clouded the windows, blocking out the moonlight, as demons hurtled through the air around the house. Sam and Dean raised their salt-filled shotguns, and Julie reached for a silver angel blade.

"I think it's a little late for that," Dean muttered as the three hunters prepared for a fight.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Six Months Earlier...**

"I can't believe him. Can you believe him?"

Taylor Carters rolled her eyes. "No, cuz, I can't believe him."

"He won't let us help him kill that demon because 'he needs to keep us safe'? Are you kidding me?!"

"What a jackass for wanting to keep his kids safe," the twenty-eight-year-old, tall, tanned, busty blond sighed.

"If I hadn't been there on that last hunt, that wendigo would have eaten him!" Julie Carters snapped. She stood on edge, gun strapped to her hip and knife gripped tightly in her hand. She and her cousin stood in the lobby of a rundown hotel where a demon was rumored to be living, when he wasn't trying to get humans to sell their souls or sleeping with prostitutes and leaving them dead in hotel rooms across the city.

That was what had caught the attention of the three Carters', and the hunters had gone to work.

Well, Jasper and his niece, Julie had. The two of them were pretty formidable hunters: Jasper, a forty-nine-year-old man who had been hunting since his parents were killed by ghouls when he was nineteen, and Julie, a twenty-seven-year-old woman who had been raised in the life but only was allowed to hunt when her own father was killed when she was just fifteen. Jasper had then been tasked with raising her and his own daughter, Taylor, only a year older. While Julie was desperate to become a hunter and get revenge for her father's death, Taylor didn't want this life. She wasn't good at hunting, she didn't enjoy it, she just wanted out of this life. But once you got in deep enough, there was no out.

Taylor and Julie could have been sisters. They were both sexy blonds, with slender, curvy builds, and they were both sassy and sarcastic and tough enough to easily fend off the advances of any guys. However, the similarities ended there. Julie had standards. She didn't want to sleep around a lot, had only had four serious relationships, the longest lasting only six months. She wore little makeup and turned away almost all guys. And then there was Taylor. As a sign of rebellion against her father, Taylor had started going to parties, getting drunk, and sleeping around at age sixteen and never stopped. She was a slut, and proud of it. She was the kind of girl that all the guys wanted to pick up at bars: pretty, almost always drunk, and looking for meaningless sex, just like them.

"Dad will be fine, Julie," Taylor sighed, fluffing her bleached blond curls. "He's got this. We just need to watch the door and make sure that demon doesn't-"

Down the hall, there was a loud thump and a man's shout of pain. Julie started, recognizing the voice. "Uncle Jasper!" she shrieked, and just like that she was off and running, Taylor jogging behind her in the ridiculous red heels she insisted on wearing.

Julie reached the room where her uncle and the demon, possessing a red-haired, bearded construction worker were. Her uncle was lying in a pile of broken boards where he had been thrown into the wall, struggling to get up. "Jasper!" she yelled angrily, moving protectively in-between him and the demon.

He grinned, eyes flashing black. "Well, if it isn't the lovely Juliet Carters?" he laughed. "I've heard of you, kid. Been making quite a name for yourself these past few years, huh? Killed a lot of my brothers."

"And you're next," she snarled, lunging towards him.

She plunged her blade, soaked with holy water, hilt deep into his right shoulder. The demon roared in pain and lashed out, throwing Julie to the ground. She smacked her head on the ground and lay there, dazed. It was a stupid move she had just made, induced by rage at seeing her beloved uncle lying hurt on the ground. By the time Julie had recovered, so had the demon. As she started to sit up, he appeared, pinning her down with her own knife to her throat. Julie struggled not to swallow, the cold steel stained with blood digging into the exposed skin of her neck.

"Julie!" Taylor shrieked as she finally reached the room. Jasper hauled himself up and yelled angrily, "Get your hands off her, you filthy son of a bitch!"

"I don't think so," the demon smirked, pressing the knife harder into her neck. Julie winced as she felt her skin split under the knife. "I think I'll skin pretty little Juliet here while you two sit and watch. And then I'll kill you, Carters, and your daughter, too. Make a day of it. Have some fun!"

"Jasper, get out," Julie said in a hoarse whisper. Her uncle widened his eyes. "He's gonna kill me no matter what. He's got nothing on you two. Get out!"

"No!" Jasper said angrily. "Let her go, demon. Let the girls go, you can have me instead."

"Tempting but...I don't think so."

"They're just girls," Jasper pleaded quietly.

The demon just laughed, and he pulled the knife back to plunge into Julie's heart. "Juliet!" her uncle roared, and Taylor gasped in horror. Julie's brain was doing double-time as adrenaline pumped through her. She saw the cruel glee on the demon's face as he started to bring the knife down on her.

Then she heard the sickening sound of a knife cutting through a spinal cord. The demon seemed to glow with a fiery light from the inside as he gasped in pain. The he went slack, dead as a doornail. His knife clattered to the ground an inch from Julie and she stared up in shock as the dead demon was thrown to the side.

A man stood over her. He was a terrifying-looking man, although maybe that was just because he was towering over her, bloody knife in hand. He knelt a little to grab her arm and help her shakily to her feet. "You okay...Juliet?" he asked in a surprisingly low, gravelly voice.

Julie blinked as she really took in the guy, and had one thought: damn.

He was tall, a little over six foot. Broad-shouldered, muscular, dressed like a hunter in combat boots, a leather jacket, and dark jeans. And handsome. Really, classically handsome, with proportionate features, a stubbly, straight jaw, gorgeous green eyes, and shortish, styled brown hair. Julie wasn't sure she'd ever seen a hotter guy, although part of it she was sure was the fact that she had just saved him. But he was really, really good-looking. However, Julie had trained herself long ago not to think of guys like that. It always ended in sex and then waking up to find herself alone, abandoned now that her usefulness was over.

"Julie," she muttered, still a little overwhelmed.

"What?" he asked in that low voice. A sexy voice.

"My name is Julie," she said more confidently.

"Oh. Sorry. It's just..." He glanced over at Jasper and Taylor. "He called you Juliet."

"Despite the hundreds of times I've asked him not to," Julie said pointedly, turning to glare at her uncle.

He grinned. "Well, Juliet, I called you that for fifteen years..."

"And you have been calling me Julie for twelve," she replied coolly. Then she turned to face her savior again. "Sorry about that. I, uh...thank you. For saving me back there."

"Don't mention it," he muttered.

"No, thank you, really," Jasper said, walking over to this mystery man and sticking out his hand. "You saved my niece's life, and for that I am eternally grateful. I'm Jasper, by the way."

"I'm...Dean," he said, hesitating a little as if unsure what to say for his name. Automatically, Julie went through her mental list of hunters she knew of named Dean. She could only think of one, and that was just preposterous. The only hunter named Dean she knew of was Dean Winchester, and that guy was more legend than reality. He and his brother, Sam, were the legends of the hunting world, the greatest hunters alive, so people said. They had stopped the apocalypse, the leviathan threat, Abbadon, killed every monster and demon and angel that had gotten in their way. They had died, and their angel ally Castiel had just brought them back. They were feared by all monsters, and most hunters, too. They were rumored to be psychotic, master torturers and killers, and even hunters were a little afraid to cross paths with them. But this Dean couldn't be a Winchester. For one, he had just saved her life. And he seemed...well, normal. At least, normal for a hunter. Besides, he was alone. And there was one thing that was always guaranteed about the Winchesters. They were, well...the Winchesters. As in, plural. Both brothers. They never seemed to be anywhere without the other.

"Well, Dean, it is a pleasure to meet you," Taylor said, almost pushing her uncle out of the way so she could shake Dean's hand. A slow, lingering handshake full of sexual tension. At least on her half. Dean raised an eyebrow, amused by her obvious attraction to him. He seemed like the kind of guy who got that a lot, and knew how to work it.

"So, Dean, you're pretty obviously a hunter," Jasper said, trying to save Dean. He shrugged. "You were hunting that demon, too?"

"Yeah," he said nonchalantly. "Good thing, too."

"It was indeed," Julie's uncle smiled. "So, are you here alone, Dean? Or do you have other hunters somewhere around here?"

"No, it's...it's just me," Dean muttered.

"Really? A young, handsome guy like yourself, alone?" Jasper asked in disbelief. Dean shifted awkwardly, looking down. "No family, no girlfriend, nothing?"

"No, it's just me," Dean muttered, and Julie was a little worried about the darkness in his tone.

"That's too bad," Julie said quickly, trying to stop her uncle from pushing this poor guy any further. "Well, Dean, you should come hit a bar with us, then. Celebrate!"

Dean looked like he wanted to refuse. "Come, Dean!" Jasper said happily. "It's on us. Stay the night, too, if you need a place to stay."

Dean eventually agreed to come out to celebrate with them, and to stay the night. He had a case already lined up just an hour away, one that the Carters' hadn't even heard about. He was good. They offered to come along on the case and help, and he agreed, looking a little excited at the prospect of spending time with other people.

It hurt Julie's heart. At a first glance this guy was tough, impenetrable, and he didn't need any help from anyone. And then you got a little closer, and realized that he was all alone. Not just alone. Lonely. She didn't believe that he had never had other people he cared about; you didn't get to be thirty-five, which is how old he later revealed himself to be, without having some loved ones. But he was alone now, and no one should have to go through this life alone. So Julie decided then and there that she was going to make sure this guy did not ever feel lonely the entire time he was with them.

At the bar, Taylor hit on Dean for a while before finally accepting she wasn't getting anything from him tonight. Once she got bored, and considerably drunk, she went over to a table of three absolutely hammered guys and hit it off immediately. Jasper hung out for a while at the bar with Julie and Dean, getting to know this new hunter. Jasper commented on Dean's skill as a hunter and talked up Julie as well. However, a pretty woman of about forty entered the bar, and Jasper soon left to do a little skirt-chasing, leaving Julie and Dean alone at the bar, after a quick warning to Dean to keep his hands off Jasper's niece.

Dean chuckled as Jasper walked away. "Sorry about that," Julie muttered, trying not to blush.

"Don't be," Dean said. "He's just protecting you. He seems like a good guy."

"He is," Julie agreed.

Dean took a nice long swig of his second or third beer. Julie did the same. She had never been the kind of person who was bothered by silence; in fact, she rather liked being able to just sit in silence with someone, unlike her chatty family. It seemed Dean was much the same, and for a while they sat next to each other and sipped their beers. Then Julie turned to Dean and asked, "So, Dean. Got a last name?"

He shrugged. "Yeah."

She blinked. "Okay...are you going to tell me?"

"No." Julie smirked, she couldn't help it, and he smirked, too.

"Alright, I respect that," Julie said. "Got anything you will tell me?"

Dean turned a little on his bar stool to face her and smiled a little. For the first time since she had met him, she could see little laugh lines around his eyes and mouth, not just the creases in-between his eyebrows. "What do you want to know?" he asked.

And so, over the next half hour, Julie got to know this mysterious Dean. He had been raised into the life, a born and bred hunter. When she asked about his friends, he gave a long list of well-known hunters: Bobby, Rufus, Ellen, Jo, Ash, and others. Every single one of them was dead, had been dead for a while. No wonder this guy was like this! He had lost every single person he cared about.

And in return, Julie told Dean her story. Her father, Thomas, and her uncle, Jasper, had started hunting when their parents were eaten by ghouls when Jasper was only nineteen and his younger brother, Thomas, only seventeen. They hunted for a year, until they managed to find and kill the ghouls who had killed their parents. Then they settled down, Jasper with a somewhat flighty blond girlfriend who gave birth to a little girl, and Thomas, with his high school sweetheart, Katrina, a sweet, gentle blond girl. They got married, had a little girl a year later than Jasper, and were living a happy, normal life together.

At least until the vengeful mate of a vampire Thomas had killed in his year of hunting broke into their house in the dead of night and killed his wife.

Thomas and Jasper returned to hunting then with a new fury. Jasper's girlfriend left him, leaving little Taylor behind, which left two guys in their early twenties with little toddlers to watch out for. The cousins were often left at babysitters while the brothers hunted monsters together. For years it went on like this, until Thomas and Jasper found a nest of vampires. They were expecting four, and got nearly ten. Thomas was killed that disastrous night, leaving fifteen-year-old Juliet an orphan now to be raised by her uncle alone.

"I'm sorry," Dean said quietly, moving to put his hand over hers, and then changing his mind. "I lost both my parents too. I know how it feels."

Julie blinked back a wetness from her eyes. "I...that's why I hate being called Juliet. That's what my parents named me, and that's what they called me until I was fifteen. But then my dad died, and now when people call me that...well, it reminds me of him. So I'm Julie now."

"And I will respect that," he said.

They talked for a little while more, until one of the bartenders, a sleazy guy around Dean's age came over and started hitting on Julie. She rolled her eyes and blew him off a couple of times, but he just kept bothering her. Finally, he grabbed her arm and said, "Come on, Julie. Come home with me. You know you want to. Ditch this guy, we'll get out of here."

"Leave me alone!" she snapped, pulling away from him.

"Oh, don't be like that, sweetheart," he tried again, reaching for her.

Finally, Dean was no longer content to sit there drinking his fourth or fifth beer. "Hey!" he snapped in a low, rough voice. "She told you to leave her alone."

The bartender was looking for a fight, and he turned to grin nastily at Dean. "And what are you going to do about it, tough guy?" he smirked.

Dean just rolled his eyes. "That's what I thought," the bartender growled, and he grabbed Julie's arm again. She threw him off, and the next second there was a knife quivering in the wooden bar, having barely missed the bartender's fingers. He stared in shock and horror at how close he had just come to being short a finger or two.

"The only reason you still have all five fingers is because I want you to," Dean growled. He pulled his knife out of the counter and snarled, "Now, leave, before I get even more pissed."

The guy disappeared, wide-eyed, probably to call some cops. Julie bit her lip to keep from grinning. "You know, Dean, you're kind of terrifying," Julie laughed as the two of them quickly gathered her family and bailed before the cops showed up.

"You don't seem too scared," he shot back, an eyebrow raised.

And Julie looked him straight in those gorgeous green eyes and said truthfully, "I'm not."

* * *

><p>"Ouch!" Dean winced through gritted teeth. "That hurts."<p>

"Yeah, you're right," Julie snapped back as she finished sewing shut the gash across Dean's forearm. "Having your arm slashed open by a werewolf does hurt, not that you seem to care."

Dean's eyes narrowed. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Julie sighed. "Dean, you had no reason to throw yourself in front of the werewolf like that."

"I was protecting you-"

"I was fine," she snapped. "I could have easily killed the thing, but you put yourself in harm's way, for no reason. God, it's almost like you wanted to be killed!"

"I could think of a lot worse things happening than me dying," he muttered under his breath.

Those words filled Julie with a deep rage. Over the past three days she and Dean had gotten close. Working a case always brought people together, but she had really gotten close with this guy. He was funny, and charming, and caring, and tough, and secretive. She wished he wasn't, because she was really starting to care about him. She hated to admit it, but somewhere between the days of investigations and research, during the boring hours spent in the car or talking over whatever crap was on cable in the motel rooms that night, she had really started to care about him. When she got up in the morning, there was a little ache that wasn't satisfied until she saw him there, eating crap food from a vending machine, a goofy smirk on his face, or standing in her kitchen, trying and failing to help Jasper make eggs. When Taylor would hit on Dean or squeeze close to him on the bed, not-so-subtly showing him her rack, a little flare of jealousy would fill her. Julie would think of a funny comment, she'd say it to Dean, and do a private little victory dance inside when he gave her that panty-melting half-grin.

The thought of this Dean she had only known a few days dying? It made her crazy. The thought of him thinking he deserved to die? That death for him wouldn't be so bad? Now that made her pissed.

She and Dean were back at the Carters' place, in the shed where they kept their hunting supplies. Dean was sitting on a counter where all wounds were patched up, and Julie had just finished tying a clean, sterile bandage over the scratch on his arm. He was lucky he hadn't been bitten. He was lucky he was still human. He was lucky he was still alive.

"No, Dean!" Julie snapped with an anger that surprised herself. "You are not going to think like that. You are not going to do that to yourself, or the people who care about you. And don't give me that shit about nobody caring-I know that's not true." Words were just pouring out now. "I care, okay? So you need to start taking care of yourself, because whether or not you believe it, you're a great hunter, and a good man, and the world needs more people like you."

For a second, Julie thought maybe, just maybe, she had gotten through to him. Then he shook his head bitterly. Anger flared in her again, and she said, "Damn. You really don't believe a word I'm saying, do you?" He glared at the floor. "What the hell happened to you, Dean, to make you really believe you don't deserve to live?" she asked in a softer tone.

He couldn't meet her eyes. Something she said must have struck him, though, because he said softly, "To list every reason I don't deserve to be here right now would take a good couple of years, Julie."

She crossed her arms and studied him. "Well? I'm waiting."

Dean shook his head and sighed. "I...I've killed people. A lot of people. I've got an ocean of blood on my hands, innocent blood. I got so bad that even the only people I had left couldn't stand to be with me anymore. And I wanted to be angry with them, for leaving me like that, but...they did the right thing. Good for them, for escaping. Good for Sam for finally getting rid of the baggage."

Julie blinked, stunned. For one thing, he was finally opening up, actually sharing something real. And the pain and the hurt and the hatred, the hatred of himself in his eyes and his voice broke her heart. But there was something else...Sam. He had said Sam. And how many hunters were there, who were kickass, skilled men with oceans of blood on their hands who had been close friends with Bobby Singer and knew and loved a man named Sam? There was only one, and that name was the last bit of information she needed, the final proof to what Julie had known since the first night she met him. She just hadn't wanted to believe it.

"Sam?" Julie asked softly, in a whisper. Dean winced, knowing he had just blown any chance at hiding who he really was.

"Dean...what's your last name?" Julie asked slowly, giving him one last chance to deny it.

"You know, Julie," he sighed. "You've known for a while, haven't you?"

"Winchester," she got out. "You're...Dean Winchester."

"In the flesh," Dean said with a smirk, trying to lighten the mood. "Took you long enough. I mean, I gave you my real name and everything!"

To his surprise, she laughed a little, too. "Yeah...I guess I just didn't want to believe it," she admitted. She laughed again, and Dean studied her, curious. This was not what he was expecting. Screaming and running away, hitting him, telling him to leave, trying to kill him...those were all more along the lines of what he was expecting.

"What are you thinking?" he asked softly. "Why are you smiling?"

"I don't know, because you're real?" she laughed. He blinked. "The way people talk about you...you and your brother defeated the devil, stopped the apocalypse, took down Dick Roman and Abbadon, stopped those angel wars...well, it sounds crazy."

"It was crazy, alright," Dean muttered wryly.

Julie locked her beautiful blue eyes on him, and the feeling he had been trying to suppress for days stirred in his gut again. "They're wrong though, the people and the things they say about you. They make you out to be some kind of psychotic, kill-and-torture-crazy...well, monster."

"Are you saying I'm not?" he asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

"Well, if I was a monster, I'd be running, and I'm sure you are...quite the killer and torturer when you need to be, but..." She leaned towards him a bit without realizing it. "You're a good guy, Dean. You're not the guy they make you out to be."

"I doubt you'd be saying that if you knew half the things I've done," Dean muttered coldly, the familiar wave of self-hatred washing over him like an old friend. This poor, sweet, beautiful, brave girl thought he was good. She called him a good man. Maybe once he had been good, but that was years ago, before Sammy died and he sold his soul, before hell, before he broke, before the Mark and the Blade...Dean wanted so badly to be this good guy that she thought he was. To be the funny, charming, tough, brave guy she had known these past days, the guy who she made smile, the guy who watched her smile and talk and work and wanted her, and not just her body. Wanted her light, her happiness even after all she'd gone through, wanted her love. Why couldn't he just be good? Maybe then Sammy and Cas wouldn't have left, would still love him. Maybe then she could love him, too...

Dean looked up as he felt her hand on his, and watched as Julie sat down on the counter next to him. Her face was soft, her eyes concerned and sad. "Tell me?" she asked softly. It was just a request. He could shrug it off and leave and never see her again, stay locked in this shell, trapped with his dark past and his mistakes and his grief and his guilt. Or he could tell this sweet, brave woman, this good woman, too good for him, and she could share his pain.

And the thought of not being alone any longer was so wonderful to him that Dean finally let down his walls for the first time in months. And over the next hour or so he told her everything. His shitty childhood, about his dad and his mom and how she died, how he was raised in the life. He told her about Sam going off to college, Dad disappearing, the two brothers trying to find him and coming back to Sam's wonderful girlfriend murdered by a demon. He told her of their hunts, their fights, the times they died, the friends they lost, the mistakes they made. He told her everything, until he finally recounted what the Mark of Cain and the First Blade had turned him into and how he had lost the only two people left who mattered. His throat was raw from talking and the pain was fresh after just recounting everything that he had been through in his awful, hellish life, but he did feel a little better for a moment. The moment before Julie got up and ran away from him, horrified at the things he'd done, never wanting to see him again.

"Dean..." her voice came, a soft, concerned whisper. "I...I'm sorry. I can't even imagine."

Her concern made him want to cry. Was it even possible? Could somebody like her even care about him, care that he was hurting? He said bitterly, "Yeah. I honestly have no idea why I told you all that."

Julie hopped off the counter and moved so she could face him. Dean also slid off the counter and stood for the first time in over an hour, just starting to realize how long he had talked. "Maybe...you just needed to tell someone?" she guessed. "Dean, that's...that's a lot. That's more than anyone should ever have to go through, and you honestly can't bear it alone. You can't do everything on your own! Sometimes you need some help." She smiled a little at him.

God, she was beautiful, he thought again. He had thought that a lot in the time he had known her, but he had never really been trying to get in her pants. He had realized pretty early on how good she was. Too good for him. He didn't deserve a girl like her, didn't even deserve a one night stand with her. She deserved better than to have to wake up and realize he had left her in the middle of the night, having gotten what he wanted. So he had kept himself focused solely on the case. However, that... hadn't worked well. She was just too clever, too funny, too kind, too tough and brave and gorgeous and he couldn't help but start to fall for her. And that was bad, bad news for her. Anyone close to Dean got hurt. That was just a fact. So now, it was time for him to leave, before he ruined another wonderful person's life and ended up getting them killed.

Only one problem: Dean was weak. He was selfish, and lonely, and weak, and he couldn't leave. She was right, he needed help. "I'm tired of this, Julie," he admitted quietly. "I...I don't want this anymore. I'm so tired of being alone."

Julie Carters took another step closer to him. She was so close, he could feel the warmth radiating from her. There was something in her eyes, an emotion he couldn't quite read...but he was pretty sure he was mirroring it exactly. "You're not," she whispered, and then she slowly leaned in.

Dean leaned the rest of the way in, and their lips met. Her lips were soft, and Dean felt a tension that had been building in him for days release the moment they kissed. One hand went behind her back and drew her closer in, while his other hand stroked her blond curls like he had been aching to for a while now. Julie's hands made their way to the back of his neck, and she pulled him a bit closer.

After a long, sweet moment, they pulled apart slightly and leaned their foreheads together. Julie breathed in deeply, trying to cement this moment in her memory forever. The shed smelled of sawdust and disinfectant, and Dean smelled of sweat and motor oil. His thumb brushed against her cheek, his other hand at the small of her back, spreading warmth through her. She hadn't realized how badly she'd been wanting that kiss until now, now in the euphoria after it. He was a good kisser, and she wanted more. Dean leaned in and kissed her again, their mouths moving together, tasting each other. This time when they pulled apart, they laughed a little uncertainly. Dean gave her that smirk she had grown to love, the one that crinkled his eyes and actually showed some genuine happiness. And she knew then, in that moment, that she was in trouble. She really, really liked this guy.

Julie wanted to stay in Dean Winchester's arms for the rest of her life. She wanted to keep kissing him, to sweep everything off the counter and tear each other's clothes off and...

No. No, she didn't. She quickly shut down all thoughts like that and just focused on the facts. She knew this guy a lot better than she had an hour or two ago, but she still did not know him well enough to have sex with him, according to the rules she had lay down for herself after her rebellious stage, where she had a lot of meaningless sex and got nothing out of it. With a sigh, Julie pulled gently out of Dean's embrace and smiled at him. "I'm going to get some sleep," she said quietly. "You should too, Dean."

She worried for a moment that he would think she was rejecting him, but he didn't seem hurt or put-out at all. He leaned back against the corner and said, "Goodnight, Jules."

"Julie," she corrected automatically, and he quickly apologized. But then she stopped. Jules didn't make her feel flimsy and girly. Jules didn't remind her of her dead father. Jules was just a nickname, a pet name that had rolled off of Dean's tongue so easily he must have thought it before. A pet name only Dean could call her. She didn't mind that...

She turned to face Dean. "Wait. I actually...don't mind that. I can be Jules, to you."

Dean grinned that same half-grin she had first gotten out of him at that bar that first night, the one that had made her stomach twist then and did now. "Well then, I'll see you tomorrow, Jules."

"You will be here tomorrow, then?" she asked, hating the desperation in her voice.

He smiled a little. "Do you want me to be?"

She thought about playing it cool, but decided against it. "Yes."

Dean Winchester smiled. "Well then, Jules, I'll be here. As long as you want me." There was a double meaning to those words, but she didn't care. She just hoped Dean knew that she might want him around for a very long time.

* * *

><p>The next three days passed in a blur as Julie and Dean continued to fall for each other. Each morning, they would get dressed and rush downstairs just to see each other across the kitchen. They didn't bother trying to hide anything, making eyes at each other over the breakfast table, while Taylor pouted and Jasper watched, amused. The first day after that kiss in the shed, Julie had to run errands, and she and Dean got into his Impala and ran all the errands they could possibly think of. They had lunch at a nice diner and then Julie took Dean to her favorite spot in town: the dock of the small manmade lake in town. They sat on the edge of the dock, hanging their feet over the edge and drinking beers, talking about their favorite songs and movies and silly, pointless things. The next day, they did inventory with Jasper and Taylor, cleaning weapons, did some shooting on the shooting range, played poker late into the night. And the next day, Julie woke to find that Dean had made plans for the day. He had two tickets to a baseball game, and they drove with the windows rolled down, blasting Metallica and ACDC and Bon Jovi, singing at the top of their lungs. They watched the game, Dean's first, eating crap food and cheering for whatever team was winning, laughing and kissing under the bright summer sun. They hung out at the Carters' for a while, until Dean asked Julie out to a formal dinner date at the nicest place in town.

Dean had been trying his hardest to act like a normal boyfriend, going through the motions and kind of enjoying it. It was weird for him, going on a date with a girl, sitting and talking and getting to know her, actually enjoying himself. And he knew, he knew deep down he was falling in love with her, although he didn't want to admit it. He just didn't fall in love; he was Dean Winchester. He had really only been in love once, and that had not ended well.

But Dean put on his cheap FBI suit for the date and waited at the bottom of the stairs for Julie. And the moment she came down, wearing a sexy black dress, blond curls tighter, wearing only a little makeup and black heels, Dean knew it was all worth it.

He was adorably bad at this whole dating thing, Julie thought. He remembered to open the car door for her and pull her chair out for her at the restaurant, but he was so inexperienced and nervous that she finally just kissed him to calm him down. After that, they were able to talk and eat and laugh like normal. And as Julie stared at Dean across the table, as he made her laugh and she took in how unfairly gorgeous he was in a suit, she knew. She was in love, and that was not good. Not good at all.

But then why was she so happy?

After dinner, they got in Dean's Impala and just drove for a while. They drove back to the dock and sat on the edge again. Julie kicked her heels off and dangled her feet over the moonlit water and leaned back into Dean's solid warmth. And then they really talked. They talked about their dreams in life. Julie told Dean about her rebellious stage, where she had gone to medical school and gotten her degree to be a nurse, and how she had slept around a lot. That reminded Dean of Sam running away to college, and he told her more about Sam. They talked about past relationships. Dean told her about Ben and Lisa, and in return Julie told him about her most recent boyfriend, James Hawthorne, a fellow hunter who she had really liked and dated for six months, but who had then wanted her to stop hunting and work only as a nurse so she could raise their kids. That had not gone over well with her, and they had broken up.

Eventually, they drove back to the Carters' house. Dean walked Julie to the stairs before they said goodnight. He kissed her once, long and soft, and that seemed like it would be it. "I had a great time tonight," he said softly.

"Me too," Julie smiled.

Dean took a deep breath. "Look, Julie...I'm no good at sappy stuff like this, but...these past few days... they've changed me. I'm still a screwed up mess, but I'm so much the better for knowing you. You are probably the best woman I have ever known and I...I care about you. A lot. I have a terrible life, and I would never want to drag anybody into it, but, Jules, I..."

Julie pressed a finger to his lips to stop him. "I love you too," she whispered with a little smile.

For a long second, they stared at each other. And then, gently, Dean leaned in and kissed her. It was a good kiss, but it left her wanting more. Julie grabbed the collar of Dean's shirt and pulled him closer. They kissed more passionately, lips moving together, Julie fumbling around until she undid Dean's tie and pulled his jacket off. Then, finally, Dean couldn't take it anymore, and he picked her up easily and carried her into his bedroom.

Dean never forgot that night, no matter what he went through. It was always there, one of the best nights of his life, the first with the woman who would soon become the love of his life.

* * *

><p>The next five days passed happily, Dean and Julie falling more and more in love. Each morning they would get up after a perfect night together, shower and get dressed, and come downstairs to a breakfast of teasing from Julie's family. They didn't care. They were high on their new love, spending every second possible together. However, as the days passed, they began to get restless. They had not hunted in a while, and being idle was not something hunters knew how to do. And so, finally, Julie brought up the subject of leaving. Dean didn't want to take her from her family, but they both agreed this couldn't go on forever. And so Julie left her home to hunt with Dean Winchester.<p>

Their goodbyes were hard, especially for Julie. She had to say goodbye to the slutty, annoying, bitchy cousin who had become a sister to her. She had to say goodbye to the beloved uncle who had become a father to her. But Dean and Jasper's goodbye was the hardest.

Jasper pulled Dean aside. They all knew that he was the hunter of legend by now, so he said, "Dean Winchester. You're one of the greatest hunters in the world. You're a good man, and you love my niece. Hell, over these past weeks you've become like a son to me. But I made a promise to my little brother as he died, that I would keep his daughter safe. Can you imagine your brother giving you one last request, how badly you would want to follow it?"

Dean thought of Sam's last wish, that Dean live with Ben and Lisa. And he had, right up until Sam returned. "I can, actually."

"Well then, you'll understand how hard it is for me to let Julie go," Jasper continued. "Dean...the people around you or your brother...they get hurt. They die. And I need to know, I need to hear you say-can you promise me you will keep my Juliet safe?"

And Dean looked at him with a heartbreaking expression and said, "No. No, Jasper, I can't. I would die to keep her safe, but I can't promise that."

Jasper sighed and nodded. "I know," he whispered. "I know..."

But Julie left with Dean anyway. And for a few weeks they lived the life of crappy motels and life-or-death hunts, always on the road, working a job. But eventually, Julie wanted more. So they settled down in a cute little town in Illinois. Dean got a job as a mechanic and Julie went to work at the hospital as a nurse. They were pretty popular, a new, attractive, young couple. Julie had a very close friend, Elaine, a fellow nurse and one of their neighbors, and Dean would often go out drinking with the three other men who worked at the mechanic's shop. Julie went shopping with some of the other women in town, and they were both hit on by both single people and people in relationships in the town. They would throw barbeques and watch games with their friends, doing a very good job of playing the role of happy, normal, all-American couple. It was exhausting but fun. And every day after work, when Dean would come into the house smelling of motor oil and sweat and scoop Julie up and kiss her, she would be so thankful for this life.

And every once in a while, they would disappear for a few days. None of the neighbors knew why, but they were actually on the occasional hunt that popped up nearby. And they were happy. They were happy, in love, living a "normal," settled-down life. And piece by piece, Julie picked up the broken man she loved and put him together, until finally, Dean was whole again. And he was happy, or as happy as he could be without his brother and Castiel. As happy as a Winchester could be.

And then, one fateful night, Sam Winchester broke into their home in the middle of the night, and everything changed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

"Sam and Dean Winchester! We know you're in there, boys. Come on out to play!"

Julie shifted closer to Dean, instinctively, her leg brushing his. Dean pressed his side against hers in a comforting gesture, keeping his eyes on the door and his shotgun raised. The voice they heard calling from the streets was a woman's, high and mocking and triumphant. Julie hated this whole situation, trapped in their warded house, surrounded by demons. She wouldn't mind if it weren't for all the innocent civilians in their unprotected homes. Her best friend, Elaine, lived just next door. When the demons got smart and went for victims to draw the boys out, she would be the first one.

"Got a plan, Sammy?" Dean muttered, on high-alert.

"My plan was to get here and warn you before these guys killed you," Sam shot back.

"Good plan."

"Oh, boys!" the demon out in the street shrieked. "It's not polite to keep a lady waiting..."

"Alright, here's the plan," Dean said grimly. "I'll go out in the street, distract them, start a fight. You know, my specialty. And you two run out the back and get out of here."

"Not happening," Sam and Julie said at the same time. Julie glanced up at Dean's huge, tough baby brother, and Sam nodded at her. It was just like Dean to want to sacrifice himself so that the people he loved could get out, and it was nice to see Julie wasn't the only one who refused to take that option anymore.

"Got a better idea?" Dean asked angrily, to a response of deafening silence.

"Do we have to drag you boys out ourselves?" the female demon cried. The Winchester brothers and Julie did not reply, but stood tensely by the door, armed and ready for an attack. "Here, I'll cut you a deal," she tried again. "Sammy, sweetheart, you send Dean out and we swear, we'll let you go your merry way. We really only want big brother, see? After all, he's the one who killed our queen, not you."

"Great," Dean muttered. "More Abbadon followers."

"You've faced them before?" Sam asked, surprised.

"We've been quite popular with demons lately," Julie explained. "Abbadon enthusiasts especially. You'd think they would learn when not a single one of them ever comes back alive."

"I'm getting impatient, boys," the demon in the street cried. "You'd better come out to play before I start burning down houses and skinning the poor people inside."

"Gotta love demons," Dean muttered, and Julie could see the cold fury in his eyes. These were his friends, too. If that demon bitch and her friends so much as touched these innocent people...

"We need to go out and fight," Sam said firmly. "Otherwise, they'll start attacking civilians."

"I'll go out, and you and Jules go out the back way and sneak around and ambush them," Dean replied, picking up a flask of holy water and attaching it to his belt.

"Dean..." Sam started to protest, but he was cut short by a woman's scream.

"Too late!" the demon cackled. "Dean boy, I've got three of your neighbors out here, sweetheart. A pretty little brunette, and a nice couple. What are your name, folks?" There was a beat of silence, and then a woman's shriek of pain. Julie gasped and Dean had to grab her arm to keep her from tearing out of the house. "Alright...we've got an Elaine, and a Heather and a Greg. Sound familiar, honey? I think they know you, don't you folks? Wouldn't want to let your friends die for you, now would you?"

"Dean, those are our friends," Julie whispered desperately, clutching at his arm. "We have to help them!"

"I'll give you boys one minute to come out, and then I start snapping necks." Julie turned to stare, wide-eyed at Dean. _What do we do?_ her eyes asked him.

"Alright, Jules, I don't think they know about you," Dean said, thinking fast. "Sam and I will go out there and distract them, and you sneak around the back way and get them out safe, okay?"

"Alright," Julie breathed, grabbing Dean's hand. "Dean...be safe. You too, Sam."

The brothers nodded at her and then stepped out of the safety of the house into the street.

There were five demons, two possessing burly, construction-type guys, another in a woman in a business suit, one in a lawyer-type, suit-sporting guy, and one in a woman who was very obviously a prostitute from the skimpy outfit and heavy makeup she wore. The man and woman in suits were holding guns and had them pointed at two terrified women and one man. The older woman was clinging to the man, wearing a nightdress, her brown curls frizzy and wild, and the man wore a night-shirt and his boxers, his dark hair receding. A thin, terrified woman of about twenty-eight stood next to them, dark hair wild, wrapped in a cardigan, shaking with fear and cold. When the young woman saw Dean, she cried, "Dean!" The couple spotted him next, and the man yelled, "Dean, what the hell is going on?!"

"Friends of yours?" Sam muttered to Dean, who replied calmly, to his brother's surprise, "Yes."

"Alright, bitch, we're out here," Dean snapped as they reached the edge of the street, addressing the prostitute he was sure was the demon who had been addressing them before. "Now let those people go, and we'll settle this the old-fashioned way."

The demon laughed. "Drop your weapons, then we'll talk," she retorted. Sam and Dean dropped their shotguns and kicked them away when instructed to. Dean removed the holy water from his belt, and Sam was forced to hand over the demon-killing blade. Then one of the burly demons approached Sam and patted him down, finding another knife inside his jacket and taking it, while the lead demon approached Dean and patted him down slowly until she found the knife tucked away in his boot. She smirked as she took it, her hands lingering too long on every part of him.

"Hey, at least I'm getting felt up by the hot chick," Dean muttered to his brother, who almost smirked.

"Okay, we're unarmed," Sam said to the leader of the demons. "Now let these people go; they've done nothing wrong."

"All the more reason to keep them here," the female demon replied with a smirk. "They're friends of yours, aren't they, Dean?" she asked him with a sickly sweet smile. "They seem to know you at the very least."

"They're just people," was Dean's growled reply. "Let them go."

"Make me," she shot back, standing too close to Dean. "Come on, Dean. Show me those legendary skills. We've missed you, these past few months. You haven't been hunting, not like Sammy here. I've been itching to peel the skin off your bones, to boil those pretty green eyes, and where were you? Pretending to be normal with these maggots?"

"I was trying to do you demons a kindness," Dean replied with a smirk. "Trying to give you sons of bitches a chance to recuperate after I killed so many of you, after I took down your precious queen."

The demon's pretty face twisted into a mask of hate and she punched him hard in the face. While Dean's vision went spotty, he heard his three trapped friends cry out. Dean ignored them. They had no idea who he was, how little a punch in the face hurt compared to the countless tortures he'd endured. He raised his head and grinned at the demon. "Sorry, sweetheart," he smirked. "I hope I didn't upset you."

"You will pay for what you did to the queen," she snarled. "You will suffer for all eternity in hell, after we've killed you and your precious brother."

"Do you have any idea how many demons have tried and failed to do that?" Sam smirked. "You're in over your head."

"We'll see who is really in over the head," the demon smirked. "Put them over there with the others," she ordered her fellow demons. The two burliest demons grabbed the Winchester's arms and pinned them behind their backs before marching them over to the other victims.

"I missed this, Sammy," Dean smirked. Sam just stared at his older brother, unable to comprehend the goofy grin on his face.

Sam and Dean were forced over to the other three people. "Dean, what's going on?" the pretty dark-haired woman, Elaine, Julie's best friend asked. Her eyes were wide with fear and concern. "Are you okay?"

He almost laughed. "Me? I'm fine. You guys, are you okay?"

Dean's friends nodded, still pale and scared. The older woman, Heather, was staring suspiciously at Sam. "Who is that?"

"Sammy, meet my neighbors," Dean said brightly. "Heather, Greg, Elaine, meet my little brother, Sam. He's great, you'd love him. If you weren't probably about to die, that is..."

Everyone stared at Dean, unable to believe how calm and light-hearted he seemed right now. In truth, he was concerned, but he was still living on the high of having Sammy back in his life. Anything was possible now that he was back with his brother once more.

"Where's Julie?" Greg asked loudly. "Is she still in the house? Is she-?"

Elaine stomped on Greg's foot while Sam and Dean shot him terrifying glares. The older man wisely shut up, but the damage was done. The lead demon chuckled darkly. "What's this, Dean?" she asked in a sickly sweet voice. "Is there someone else I'm forgetting about? Do you have a pretty little girlfriend hiding in there?"

She came too close to him once again, and Dean glared down at the demon before him. Her eyes flashed completely black and Heather shrieked. The demon gave Dean a cat's grin and cried, "Torch the house! If there's someone still in there, make sure they can't get out."

One of the demons moved towards Dean's house, getting lighter fluid out of a nearby truck. Elaine gasped and Greg went white as a sheet. Heather began to wail hysterically as the demon lit the front door on fire. As for Sam and Dean...the brothers exchanged a concerned glance. There was a good chance that Julie got out already, but if she hadn't...if she was in that burning house...

Dean watched his home slowly go up in flames, a cold sense of dread and fear filling him. Heather was crying, and Elaine drew closer to Dean and asked in a soft, terrified voice, "Dean...was she in there?"

Before he could reply, the main demon cried, "I hope you weren't too attached to this 'Julie,' Winchester, because she'll soon be dead. Just like you."

"Well, bitch, what are you waiting for?" Dean snarled. Whether or not Julie had been in the fire, that was his house she had just burned. He was ready for a fight.

She didn't reply, just punched him again. His ears were still ringing from the punch when she hit him again in the gut. If not for the demon holding him up, he would have collapsed. His friends shrieked while the demon hit him again and again, laughing, and he was vaguely aware of Sammy struggling and swearing nearby. But there was nothing anyone could do as the burly demon holding him up finally threw him to the ground at her feet and the demon lifted his bloody head by his hair, tracing his own demon-killing knife along his jaw.

"_You_ are the great Dean Winchester who killed our queen?" she smirked, adjusting her grip on the knife and preparing to slit his throat. "Well...let me just say, you were an utter disappointment."

"I'll try to do better next time," Dean smirked, and then he kicked the demon's legs out from underneath her.

Julie, who had been hovering nearby in the shadows, everything in her screaming to kill the bitch hitting her boyfriend, leapt forward now, while the demon's leader was still surprised. She hurled her silver angel blade through the air and it landed with a satisfying _thunk _in the back of the demon holding Sam's arms. The younger Winchester immediately tackled the nearest demon, and Julie retrieved her blade from the demon's back.

"Julie?" Heather cried in a shocked, horrified voice.

"Oh my god…" Greg whispered.

Julie didn't have time to even spare them a glance. Dean had tackled the demon, and they were scrabbling wildly on the ground, kicking and punching each other as they both tried to reach Dean's demon-killing knife lying a couple feet away. Normally, Dean would overpower the demon, but his face was covered in his own blood and he was still a little weak and sore from the serious beating he had just taken. Julie took a step to go to his aid, but then Elaine shrieked and something came whistling towards her.

Julie ducked just before a bullet whizzed over her, right where her head had been. She turned on the demon firing on her, a woman in a pantsuit, and managed to slice her shooting arm. The demon dropped the gun and shrieked horribly at Julie before lunging at her.

The two women spun in a blur of flying fists and feet until Julie managed to get in a good solid hit to the demon's head. She was stunned for a moment, and in that second, Julie drove her blade hilt-deep into the demon's heart. The demon flashed with a fiery light and collapsed, dead.

She whirled around, just in time to see Sam scoop up a nearby shotgun and fire two rounds of salt into the two demons he had been sparring. They collapsed, unconscious, and Sam and Julie both turned just in time to see the female demon finally pin Dean down.

"Dean!" they both shrieked, but the hardened hunter wasn't done yet. He grinned, his teeth stained with his own blood, and drove the blade, which he somehow must have grabbed during the scuffle, into her gut. The demon shrieked, glowing with the same fiery light as the other two demons Julie killed, and then died. Dean threw the poor, dead woman who had been possessed off of him and Julie and Sam rushed to help him to his feet.

Dean was weak and battered, but somehow still grinning. "Looks like we're back in business, Sammy," he smirked as they were finally able to haul him to his feet.

Sam shook his head with a little smile, and they turned to the three humans. Heather and Greg were clinging to each other, pale and terrified. Elaine's eyes were wide with fear and amazement. "What just…?" she started to ask in a tremulous voice.

Julie sighed internally. Here we go. She was about to lose three friends and she knew it. "Look, guys, if you would just let us explain…" she started.

She took a step towards her friends, but they all backed away. "I don't know what the hell just happened, but I swear, if you don't stay right where you are…" Greg said, trying to sound fierce, but he was shaking.

Dean pushed off of Sam and stood on his own. "Greg, listen to me-"

"Stay away!" Heather shrieked, and he too froze.

"Let us explain, please," Julie said quietly.

"You…you're killers! You're crazy!" Greg snapped. "I don't know who the hell these people are, but you killed them."

"Hey, look pal, they were going to kill you if we didn't stop them," Sam snapped.

"Sam…" Julie said in a warning voice.

"Who are you?" Elaine asked in a voice barely above a whisper.

Julie looked so heartbreakingly sad, Dean wanted to hug her and hide her away from this mess. "We're the same people you knew before, your friends," Julie insisted.

"You're crazy," Greg said. "Stay away from us! I'm calling the cops!"

He and Heather took off for their home. "Hey, Greg!" Dean yelled. "Come on, man! We just saved your friggin' lives!"

"Elaine…" Julie tried, but the young woman turned and fled back to her own home. Julie sighed, defeated.

"Look, guys, I'm really sorry, but we've got to go," Sam said gently, touching his brother's arm. "The cops will be here soon."

"Right, right…" Dean sighed. "Okay. You two go and exorcise those poor guys over there, and I'll see if I can get anything out of the fire."

"Be careful," Julie said softly, gently touching his arm.

Dean nodded and left his brother and his girlfriend to clean up their mess. The whole house hadn't burned just yet, and Dean was able to slip in the back door and get the emergency supplies they kept in the closet before the smoke became too much. When Julie and Sam returned, they found Dean sitting on the Impala, holding two bags of spare clothes, weapons, salt, a couple thousand dollars, a little bit of food, and studying a picture. Julie smiled a little when she saw it was the two of them, arms around each other's waists, grinning at the camera. Really, truly happy.

"Let's go," Sam said gently.

"Where?" Dean asked hollowly.

"Look, Dean…" Sam took a deep breath. "I'm sorry. About me and Cas leaving you before. It was wrong, it hurt you, and…I'm sorry."

"It wasn't wrong, Sammy-"

"No, it was," Sam said firmly. "You're my brother, and you needed me, and I wasn't there. But…I'm here now, and, if you can forgive me…do you…will you and Julie come back to the bunker with me? And stay there?"

There was a tense moment, and then Dean broke into a grin and hugged his brother. "Are you kidding me, Sammy? Of course I'll come back!"

He glanced at Julie. Before he could even ask, she said, "Of course."

Sam smiled. "Alright then. Well, before the cops come and arrest us…what do you say we go home?"


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

Dean stretched out across his old bed on his stomach, resting his head on his arms. This room was so familiar to him, his home for a year, along with his brother. Though it had been nine months since he had last lived here, this room was the same. The same books of lore and porno magazines he'd spent hours poring over. The same bed where he'd spent countless nights, not sleeping. These familiar spots in the wall which he had stared at for hours, struggling with a new case or the guilt of lying to Sam or the awful nightmares brought on by the Mark and the Blade, the desire to get up out of bed and stride into his brother's room and end his life with a single swipe of a blade, to end all lives…

He shook off those awful thoughts, but he felt the burn begin again in his forearm. He resisted the urge to scratch at the Mark, tried to put it from his mind. It hadn't bothered him in so long, hadn't caused him to think like this or burned or even itched in so long…

The reason why stood in front of him, unpacking their two emergency bags and a few other supplies they had picked up along the way into the lone dresser and the closet. Dean watched her move with efficiency, making the room look like a home in the space of a few minutes like only a woman could. He shook his head as he took her in, a pretty, slim, young woman in jeans that fit her in just the right way and a sweater that hugged her curves perfectly. For a minute, Dean just stared at her hair, a lovely shade of gold in the yellow light of the room, tied in a loose knot at the base of her neck. She hummed a little as she finished folding his flannel shirts into a drawer of the dresser. He smiled.

"There," Julie sighed after a while, dusting her hands off. "Everything is officially unpacked."

"Great," Dean chuckled. "Now why don't you lie down, get some sleep? You've been awake over twenty-four hours."

"I am a _hunter_, Dean Winchester, I can go for _days _without sleep," Julie retorted with a smirk, turning to a stack of Dean's old stuff that Sam had left behind all this time Dean had been gone.

Dean smirked and shook his head again. There was something both wonderfully familiar and unsettling about seeing Julie in his old room, a place he had only shared with Sam and occasionally friends like Kevin or Charlie, or reluctant allies like Crowley. Things were changing here at the Men of Letters bunker. Dean had no idea what the future may hold, but he was pretty sure that he was going to like it, having the two people he loved most together with him in the same place.

"Uh…Dean, sweetie…what is this?" Julie asked carefully, holding up a faded copy of the unmistakable porn magazine he had once loved, _Busty Asian Beauties._

Dean swallowed and laughed nervously. Okay, so maybe things wouldn't be all happy and fun with Julie here at the bunker after all.

"In my defense…this was long before I met you," Dean said quickly, giving a hopeful, winning smile.

Julie rolled her eyes at him and shrugged it off like it was nothing, although he did catch her crumple the magazine slightly before stuffing it back in the pile. "C'mere," Dean grinned. She rolled her eyes again, but she did come and sit on the bed next to him. Dean sat up and pulled Julie into his lap, kissing her before she could protest.

After a moment, she pulled away, laughing a little. "You can't appease me just like that," she said, trying to sound gruff and failing miserably.

"I'll just have to try harder," he smirked, pushing her gently onto her back and straddling her.

"I thought I was supposed to sleep," she replied with a smirk.

Dean didn't reply, just kissed her again. Julie gave in and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him even closer. Dean smiled as he brushed his lips across her collarbone, slowly untangling her hair out of its knot, letting her hands slip up under his shirt…

* * *

><p>Dean awoke several hours later, Julie's head resting on his chest, her golden curls trailing across his skin. Before he could quite gather where he was, someone knocked on his door, and Sam's voice came through the door. "Dean…you up? Dean, there's, uh…there's someone here who wants to see you."<p>

Dean sat up a little in bed and Julie gave a soft moan and rolled over. "Sammy…?" Dean asked groggily. "What? Who are you talking about…?"

"It's me, Dean," a familiar low, rough voice said in its usual flat, awkward tone. Dean's eyes widened, and he was suddenly wide-awake. Next to him, Julie groggily opened her eyes and sat up, pulling the sheets up to cover her.

"Cas?" Dean called after a moment. "What are you doing here?"

"Look, Dean, why don't you come on out here and we'll talk," Sam said quickly.

"I don't understand, why don't we just go-"

"He's got a girl in there, Cas," Sam said in a quiet voice that somehow all four of them heard.

"Oh."

"I'll be out in a minute, guys," Dean called after a moment, and he heard their footsteps retreat into another room.

He turned to Julie's wide blue eyes and unruly blond bedhead and almost smiled. "Was that really…?" she started to ask.

"Castiel?" Dean smirked. "Yeah, yeah it was. I had better get dressed and talk to him."

Julie watched Dean quickly find a clean pair of pants and a dark button-down shirt. "Dean…how are you feeling?" she asked gently.

"About last night?" He took a moment to grin at her. "Pretty damn good."

Julie rolled her eyes as she got out of bed herself and started getting dressed. "I mean about Cas. And Sam too, for that matter. I mean, they were gone for nine months, and now they're just back in your life and I just…are you sure you're okay?"

Dean stopped for a moment to think, and then smiled. "Jules, I really am."

She couldn't resist smiling, too. "I'm glad." They kissed for a brief moment before continuing to get dressed. Once Dean was fully dressed and Julie was wearing a tank top and jeans, Julie stopped him for a moment and said, "I'm glad you're happy, Dean, but…are you sure I really belong here?"

"What?" Dean cried. "Jules, of course you do!"

"Dean, you've gone through more with this angel and your brother than I probably ever will with you, and I just…I don't want to make things uncomfortable for you guys," she said carefully. "I don't want to get in the way."

Dean took her hands. "Julie Carters, I love you. If these guys want me back in their lives, then they sure as hell better be ready to take you in too. Besides, they'll love you. Sam already does!"

"Really?" Julie asked uncertainly.

"A couple nights ago, at the motel? You and Sammy were hitting it off so well I barely got a word in edgewise!"

Julie laughed a little. "You ready to meet a real live angel?" Dean smirked after a moment, and he pulled Julie out of the room with him before she could protest.

Dean froze for a moment, staring at the two men talking in the main room of the bunker. There was his brother, his tall, buff, floppy-haired bitch of a brother, who he loved. And there was his best friend, or his former best friend, a dark-haired, blue-eyed guy in a trench coat. You would never think that the not-very-impressive guy in front of you was a kickass angel unless you had fought side-by-side with him or been dragged out of hell by him.

Sensing that Dean was there, Cas glanced over and froze as well. For a long moment, the two men stared at each other, until Julie, who was hovering behind Dean, gave him a little nudge forward.

The spell was broken, and Dean walked up to the two other men, Julie following a few steps behind him. "Sorry about that, Cas," Dean said, trying to act as if it had been nine days since he had seen the angel, and not nine months. "Eight in the morning is far too early to expect _me _up."

Cas just stared at him. Dean swallowed. "So. Uh, what's up? Just dropping by, or…"

"He's got a case for us," Sam said quickly, stepping in when Castiel said nothing.

"Really?" Dean said. "What are we dealing with? More demons? Monsters?"

"Angels, actually," Castiel said.

Julie blinked, but didn't say anything. "I thought you took all the angels back up into heaven with you when you took down Metatron," Dean said slowly.

"There were a few angels who had learned to appreciate earth and wished to stay," Cas admits. "And…there were others who did not trust me, and did not want to return to a heaven where I was in control."

Dean felt a twinge of sympathy for this angel in front of him. It was pretty clear his friend didn't want to be in control either, but God had up and left during the apocalypse, and no one knew where he had gone to, leading to a civil war between Castiel's angels and Raphael's angels, and then later a war between Metatron and Cas. The angel before him had a rough life, but it had gotten so much worse since he had become Dean's friend. Dean couldn't blame him for leaving…

"Cas says that a couple angels here on earth have gone a little kill-crazy, smiting people who preach falsely or non-believers," Sam explained. "They're killing people, and we've got to stop them, and Cas's grace is too weak for him to do it on his own…"

"Wait, what?" Dean asked. "Cas, are you okay?"

"I…am fine, Dean," the angel said haltingly. "My powers have not been the same since Metatron made me human, but…I am okay."

Dean nodded, and for a moment they just stared at each other. Then Cas's blue eyes flicked to the woman hovering nearby, and he frowned.

"Who is…?"

"Cas, this is Julie Carters," Sam said quickly. "Dean's girlfriend."

"Dean's…" Cas repeated slowly. His expression was unreadable. "I see. A lot had changed with you, hasn't it, Dean?"

Dean chuckled nervously. "Uh…yeah. Yeah, a lot has."

For a moment, no one spoke. Then Julie stepped forward and held out her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Castiel," she said kindly. "Dean's told me a lot about you."

Cas stared at her hand for a moment before shaking it. His face was still blank, and Julie stepped back, sensing that he didn't seem to like her much. When the angel didn't reply, Sam stepped in.

"Well, we should get to work on that case," he said quickly. "Cas, do you have any leads?"

"I know who the angels are," the angel said gravely. "One is Rebekah. She was once a lieutenant of mine, and very powerful if a bit…harsh. The other is Jonah, an old friend of hers. Jonah does not seem the type to kill like this, so I would assume he is simply following her orders. Either way, they must be stopped."

"Right, so we'll find these angels and put a stop to them before they kill somebody else," Dean said.

"Dean, wait," Cas said quickly. "We do not want to just kill them. They may be killing humans, but they are still my family. And we do not have a lot of angels left. If there is any way we can stop them without killing them…that would be ideal."

"Got it," Dean replied. "Stop them without killing them. Sounds simple enough."

"Now we've just got to find them," Sam sighed.

"They're not too hard to track," Cas admitted. "Most people notice when an angel smites someone in broad daylight."

And so, the three hunters and the angel went to work, searching for a lead. It was only a couple hours before they found a pastor who had been smote only a few hours ago, in a neighboring state. But within those couple hours, it became pretty clear that Cas was not very fond of Julie.

It wasn't anything she had done. In fact, Julie was perfectly kind and accepting of Castiel. But he was cool and distant, all but ignoring her. It was bothering Dean, and it was making Julie feel even more out of place. As they prepared to head out, Sam grabbed Dean's arm and pulled him aside.

"I'm sure you've noticed how Cas is behaving," Sam muttered.

"Yeah? What am I supposed to do about it?" Dean shot back.

"Look, I don't know what's up with him, but I'm pretty sure being in the car with Julie for three hours is not going to help."

"What are you suggesting, Sam?"

"We split up," Sam sighed. "I'm perfectly happy to drive with Cas, and you with Julie, but…I think it would also really help not just Cas, but you, if you two worked together." Sam's face softened. "Cas really missed you Dean, and I'm sure he wants to fix your relationship as much as you do. And I think the best way for you two to do that…"

"Is to go kill some sons of bitches together, yeah, I know," Dean sighed. "That sounds good, I guess. You sure you and Jules will be okay?"

Sam turned around to look at Julie, who was standing nearby, carefully not making eye contact with Castiel. "Hey, Julie!" She looked up. "You cool with riding with me and investigating just the two of us?"

She smiled. "Sure, Sam. Sounds good."

Sam turned to Dean with a smirk. "We'll be fine. You'll have enough to worry about just you and Cas."

And so, the two groups split off. Cas and Dean went to investigate the church where the pastor had been killed, and Sam and Julie went to investigate the nearby churches and places where the angels would most likely strike next. Sam and Julie's car ride was easygoing and fun, the two of them chatting happily and getting to know each other better, listening to the classic rock Dean so loved, or riding along in an easy, comfortable silence.

Then there was Cas and Dean's car ride.

At first, the two estranged friends had nothing to talk about. Dean's classic rock blared out of the car as they drove in silence. Then, Dean was brave enough to ask, "How have things been, Cas?"

"Good, I suppose," his old best friend sighed. "Sam and I…we've been hunting together occasionally."

"Yeah, I heard."

"Yes…well, we've been good. Okay, at least." Castiel sighed.

"Alright, cut the crap, Cas," Dean snapped. "You're not okay, are you? What took you so long to get to the bunker? It's been three days since Sam called you to say he was going to find me, and you couldn't just zap yourself here or whatever it is you angels do?"

Cas was silent. Dean sighed. "Right. You said something about your grace not being strong enough…is that true?" The angel nodded. "So…what does that mean? You don't have your mojo?"

"That's part of it," Castiel admitted. "I am weaker now than I have been in a while. Hannah and some of my other followers are supporting me, but…I can't keep up like this for much longer."

Dean spared a concerned glance for the angel that was once his best friend. "What does that mean, Cas?"

"It means…well, I'm not sure, Dean. But…I'm fairly certain unless I find another angel's grace to take, well…I may die."

Dean shook his head. "Not happening. Alright, if we can't reason with one of these angels, we'll take their grace, okay? You're not dying on us, you hear me?"

Dean glanced over at Cas when he didn't reply, and was surprised to see the angel smiling. "What?"

"I missed you, Dean."

"I…I missed you too, Cas."

After that, the two friends were able to slip into their usual banter, Dean teasing Cas and roaring with laughter at the angel's naivety, and by the end of the car ride, things were almost back to normal between them.

The two of them changed into cheap suits, fished out the good old FBI badges, and entered the church. Almost immediately, a distraught, frizzy-haired woman in her forties leapt on them. "You must be here about Pastor Jacobs!"

"I, uh…" Cas stammered.

"We are," Dean said firmly. "Agents Shirley and Jonathan. What can you tell us about the victim?"

"Oh, he was just wonderful!" she cried. "He was the nicest man, so good to everyone. He never hurt anyone, and I just don't understand why…why anybody would want to hurt him!" She was dissolving into tears, and Dean did his best to soothe her.

"Did you see him die?" Cas asked bluntly. Dean shot him a look over the stunned woman's head.

"I…I did, yes," she said in a shaky voice.

"Ma'am, I know this must be very painful for you, but can you please tell us what happened?" Dean said as gently as possible.

"He…he was right up there," she said, pointing at the pulpit. "He was teaching a Wednesday night Bible study and then…" Her bottom lip shook. "A strange woman came in. No one knew her, and she said…she said he was a hypocrite. Then she said she was from…from _God, _and then she…she touched his head and then his eyes bled and…and…"

The woman dissolved into tears again. Dean awkwardly patted her shoulder and consoled her. Once she had collected herself a little more, Cas asked, "I am sorry for your loss, ma'am. But, uh…do you have any idea what this woman meant, about him being a hypocrite?"

She frowned. "Well…people say the most awful rumors, you know how it is…but some people believed he was cheating on his wife. With a _twenty-year-old. _It's ridiculous, but…"

"Thank you for your time, ma'am," Dean said quickly. "We will do everything we can to catch the killer."

Once they were out, Dean turned to the angel beside him. "First off, how many times do I have to tell you: _empathy_!"

Cas sighed. "If that rumor is true, that would explain the angel killing him," he said. "And it sounds like Rebekah did it. It's very much her style, dramatically accusing her victim before she smites him…"

"Alright, so we know who, and we think we know why," Dean muttered. "Now we need to figure out where this Rebekah bitch is and stop her before somebody else dies."

* * *

><p>"That's the third church today, Sam," Julie sighed, sitting on the hood of the car. "I'm having no luck finding angels by pretending to be an innocent passerby. How's the fake fed doing?"<p>

"No better," Sam admitted, sitting next to her and loosening his tie. "I really hope Cas and Dean have a lead, or else we're screwed."

"Right, Cas…" Julie muttered.

Sam studied her. "Is he bothering you that much?"

"I just don't get it!" Julie said. "I'd really like to like the guy, as much for Dean as for myself. But I feel like he hates me, and I have no idea why!"

"My guess would be he's jealous," Sam shrugged.

"You're kidding, right? Why would a freaking _angel_ be jealous of _me_?!"

Sam smirked. "My brother and Cas…they've got an _interesting _relationship. I don't know what's going on between them. I feel like I never do. But…they're close. Or at least they were. Cas isn't going to like anyone else getting close to Dean, and he probably is also hurt that Dean went and found someone else while he was separate from Cas."

"Wait. Are you saying Cas and Dean were like…together?" Julie said slowly.

"No! No, nothing like that," Sam said quickly. "Just that…well, Cas is very protective of Dean, and the other way around. He doesn't know you well enough to realize you would never hurt Dean."

"And if he keeps this up, he may never know me well enough to realize that," Julie muttered, pulling her hunting jacket tighter around her.

"Hey," Sam said gently. "Give it time. Cas is still getting used to having Dean back. Before long, he'll love having you around. He just needs time to adjust. I mean, hell, it was months before he got used to Dean, and look at them now!"

"Where are they, anyway?" Julie muttered. "I thought we were meeting them some time soon."

"They're over at the dead pastor's house, investigating," Sam explained. "They aren't sure when they'll be back."

"So…next church then, I guess?" Julie sighed.

Sam pulled out the keys and they drove to the next church on the list. This church had lost one of their leaders two days ago, and they were holding a prayer meeting for him. Sam went around talking to church leaders, trying to get information, but no one had been at the church when this man had died.

Meanwhile, Julie joined the thirty or so people talking quietly or praying in the pews. She had learned long ago that sometimes, being a pretty woman could get you answers that even an FBI agent couldn't get. So she set out for the nearest guy around her age, a skinny, nerdy-looking guy sitting and talking with a couple people around her age.

"Hey," she said shyly, and he looked up, smiling.

"Uh, hi," he stammered. "Would you like to sit?"

"Thank you," she blushed, playing the shy, pretty new girl perfectly. She sat down next to him and he smiled eagerly at her.

"I'm, uh, I'm Alex," he said almost nervously.

"I'm Natalie," Julie said, saying the first name she thought of.

"Are you new here? I don't remember seeing you here before."

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm new in town," she admitted. "I came to see about joining this church and I was just wondering why there are so many people here."

"Oh, well…" Alex glanced over at the young man and woman next to him, who were bent over in prayer. "One of the leaders here, Frank Halstead…well, he died a couple of days ago."

"That's horrible!" she said. "Do they know what happened?"

"People are saying heart attack, but…" He glanced around excitedly.

"But what?" Julie asked.

"I was here with one of my buddies the night they found him," Alex admitted. "I saw the guy, and, well…I don't want to scare you."

"What do you mean?" she asked, putting on a confused expression and batting her eyelashes.

"I don't think it was a heart attack," Alex muttered, proud of himself for figuring this out. "His eyes…they were all bloody. I've never seen anything like it."

"Wow," Julie breathed. "That's…that's crazy. What do you think caused it?" She gasped. "You don't think…someone actually killed him, do you?"

"Nah," Alex said, blowing it off.

"No?" the young woman sitting nearby asked, sitting up. She had shoulder-length red curls and she was rather pretty, although her face was stony.

"Oh. Uh, hi, Kathy. Didn't see you there," Alex said nervously.

"Do you think he was killed?" Julie asked Kathy innocently.

The woman narrowed her eyes at Julie. "I…I do not. But he was a liar, and he preached lies. I can see why someone would kill him."

"Kathy, that's horrible!" Alex, said appalled. "Frank was a good man."

The young man next to Kathy sat up. He looked to be about Julie's age, with a slightly less stony expression than her, but he still seemed cold. "Perhaps we should go, Kathy," he said carefully.

They both stood and walked stiffly away. Alex stared after them, confused. As for Julie…well, as suspicious as they seemed, she was distracted by Sam, who looked almost comedic, a good head taller than anyone else in the church, dressed in a suit, and looking more than ready to go. He shot her a look, and she nodded.

"I should probably go, too," Julie told Alex. "It was nice meeting you."

"You too, Natalie," he smiled.

She almost felt bad for lying to him. He seemed like a nice enough guy. She gave him one last smile and walked over to where Sam waited, near the door. "Any luck?" she asked under her breath.

"Same old, same old," he sighed. "You?"

"Not much," she muttered. "Let's go."

What neither of them noticed was the young man and woman watching them suspiciously. When the FBI agent and the new girl walked out together, Kathy smirked and shook her head. "I knew there was something off about that Natalie girl."

"Did you see him?" the young man hissed nervously.

"The tall one in the suit? He was a little hard to miss," she snapped.

"Bekah, that was a _Winchester_!"

"You think I don't know that?" she hissed.

"If there's a Winchester on our trail…"

"Don't worry, Jonah," "Kathy" smirked. "The other one is out of commission, remember? We'll take care of him and that girl before they get in our way."

"Rebekah, are you sure-" Jonah started.

"How many of our brothers and sisters has that man killed?" the angel snapped, turning on her companion. "We will end him before he ends us."

"One problem," Jonah pointed out. "Castiel is supposedly travelling with the Winchester."

Instead of looking scared like he expected, Rebekah grinned. "Perfect," she smiled. "If Castiel is indeed here, he will come for his human friend, I'm sure of it." She shook her head. "Alright, Jonah. I have a new plan…"

Julie leaned against the wall of the church as Sam dialed Dean's number. There were no other churches they could think to investigate, and the two hunters were all out of options. But Dean still wasn't picking up. "He and Cas must still be busy," Sam sighed, hanging up.

"What do we do now?" Julie sighed.

Before Sam could reply, something collided with the back of his head. Julie cried, "Sam!" as he collapsed to the ground, unconscious. But before she could even get her knife out, a silver angel blade was pressed against her neck and someone pinned her arms to her side.

Julie swallowed carefully, trying to avoid cutting her neck on the cold blade pressed to her throat. Her eyes were locked on her friend, sprawled unconscious on the ground. But as she stared at Sam, a woman stepped over his fallen body and she stared at the redhead from inside the church, Kathy.

Julie glared at her. "I knew something was off with you," she spat at the woman before her.

"Kathy" smirked at her, stepping closer to study her. "I'm afraid I don't know who you are, girl," she said haughtily.

Julie just glared at her enemy. "Very well," the other woman sighed. "Jonah, take care of her. I'll deal with the Winchester."

Before Julie could even try and get free and help Sam, something hard hit the back of her head and everything went dark.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

The first thing Julie became aware of was the lump on the back of her head. For a moment, the pain was blinding, but slowly it faded to the point where she could open her eyes. She was in an old, dusty house, clearly abandoned. When she tried to move, she realized that her arms and legs were bound to a heavy, solid chair.

"Julie? Julie, are you okay?" Sam asked, sounding panicked. It took her a moment to realize that he was also tied to a chair back-to-back with hers. When she tried to move her hand, it brushed his.

"I'm okay, Sam," she said. "You?"

"Well, I'm tied to a chair in a strange house probably about to get killed, but you know, other than that I'm fine."

She snorted despite herself. "Has anyone come in yet?"

"No, but I've only been awake a few minutes," he admitted. Julie wished she could see Sam's face, but instead had to just focus on his voice and hope he was going to be okay. That they both were.

"Look, I saw one of them before they got me," Julie said in a quiet, careful tone. "It's that redhead I was talking to before, Kathy. She seemed suspicious in the church, and I think she may be that Rebekah angel Cas talked about."

"So we got trussed up by the very angels we were trying to stop," Sam sighed.

Before Julie could reply, the young man and woman from the church walked in. Sam groaned. "Great. I'm guessing you two are Jonah and Rebekah?"

"How do you know about us, Winchester?" the man, Jonah asked, sounding more concerned than angry.

"He's working with the traitor Castiel, remember?" the woman, Rebekah snapped.

"Cas is not a traitor," Sam snapped. "If anyone is betraying heaven and their cause, it's you two."

Rebekah's eyes flashed. She moved in front of Sam. "You know not what you speak of, human," she snarled. "Castiel caused our people to fall. He started the civil war, and many of our brothers and sisters died because of him, and then he expects us to follow him and serve him again? No! I am no traitor for refusing to serve a murderer."

"Metatron is the one who made you all fall!" Sam protested. "Metatron started that whole war, Metatron is behind all of this. You can't blame Cas for somebody else's mistakes."

"Silence," she snarled. "I do not wish to hear you defend Castiel."

"Well then, what do you want?" Julie snapped. "Because we're not false preachers or anything like that, so whatever you're doing this for-"

"Be quiet, girl," Rebekah snapped, moving to face Julie. "I do not know who you are, but I do not need you alive. So you will do what you are told, or I will put you out of your misery."

"I'm actually not very miserable-" Julie smirked, but before she could finish whatever snappy comeback she was about to make, the angel smacked her so hard her head snapped to the side.

"Hey!" Sam yelled. "Leave her alone!"

"So she's your little girlfriend, then?" Rebekah smirked.

"What? No, she's…" Sam stopped himself. "Look, what do you want with us?"

"We don't want you," Jonah snapped. "We want Castiel. But you're how we find him."

"Fantastic," Julie muttered. "We're bait."

Rebekah picked up Sam's phone and dialed Cas's number. Sam swallowed. To his surprise, Julie took his hand, and for a moment he thought she wanted to hold his hand. Then he felt her fingers begin to pull at the complicated knots binding his wrist and understood.

While Julie worked painstakingly at the ropes, Cas picked up the phone. Rebekah put him on speakerphone so they could all hear him ask, "Sam? We just finished up at the pastor's house. Where are you two?"

Sam opened his mouth to shout at Cas, but Jonah pressed his angel blade against Sam's throat, daring him to speak.

"Sam can't come to the phone right now," Rebekah smirked.

There was a beat, and then Castiel growled, "Rebekah."

"That's right, Castiel," she smiled. "I have your little human friends, and I will end their pitiful lives if you do not surrender to me."

There was the sound of a scuffle on the other end and then Dean's low, dangerous voice growled into the phone, "Listen, bitch. I don't know who the hell you think you are, but if you so much as touch either of them-"

"Who is this?" Rebekah asked haughtily.

"This is Dean Winchester, bitch, and I will personally kill you myself if you hurt either of them." Sam wanted to be happy with the knowledge that his big brother was out there, wanting to help him, but they were still in a whole lot of trouble. As for Julie, she had stopped trying to untie Sam when she heard Dean, but she started up again, fueled by the anger in his voice.

"I thought you were gone," Rebekah said flatly. "Possibly dead."

"I was, and now I'm back," Dean snapped. "Now you let the two of them go, or I swear to god I _will _kill you."

"You are in no position to make threats, Winchester," Rebekah said haughtily. "Now put Castiel back on the phone and learn your place."

"Leave Cas out of this," Dean snapped.

"This is _about_ Castiel," she said coldly. "If he doesn't surrender to us, then your brother and this girl will die."

"No," Dean snarled. "This is about you. You messed with the wrong people, sweetheart. So either you let my brother and that 'girl' go, or I kill you. That's how this is going to be."

Rebekah's eyes flashed. She turned towards Sam and Julie and studied them. "Cut the girl," she ordered Jonah.

"What?" Dean asked.

Jonah moved away from Sam and faced Julie. Rebekah moved closer and held the phone up to Julie. Carefully, Jonah made a cut from Julie's jaw down her neck, but she kept her teeth gritted, refusing to cry out. Sam, on the other hand, was snarling, "Stop it! Leave her alone! Hey!"

"What are you doing?!" Dean growled into the phone.

"This girl is stronger than I thought," Rebekah said, surprised. Then, without another word, she took Jonah's angel blade and drove it into Julie's shoulder.

Julie screamed through gritted teeth, and Dean yelled, "No!" into the phone. Rebekah pulled out the blade as Sam struggled wildly to get free and help his friend. When he realized how pitifully stuck he was, he had to settle for gently squeezing Julie's hand and telling her it would be okay.

"What did you do to her?!" Dean snarled into the phone, but there was fear mixed in with that rage.

"Dean, I'm okay-" Julie cried before Jonah hit her, silencing her.

"She is still alive, although that will change if you do not put Castiel on the phone right now," Rebekah snapped.

Dean hesitated for a moment, but within a few seconds they heard Cas ask, "What do you want of me, Rebekah?"

"There is an abandoned house about fifteen minutes away from the town you are currently in," the angel said slowly. "I will give you instructions and expect you here within twenty minutes. Any longer and these humans start losing fingers."

Rebekah left the room, continuing to talk on the phone with Cas, and Jonah followed her, pausing to give Julie an almost apologetic glance. As soon as they were gone, Julie hissed, "Sam, we have to get out of here!"

"How?" he shot back.

"See if you can untie me," she replied. "I have a knife that I can almost reach, and if I'm untied I can cut us free. Then, hopefully, when Dean and Cas get here, we can help them finish off these angels."

"Good plan," Rebekah smirked, and they realized with a start she had returned. "I'm afraid not, though. Jonah and I will be keeping a very close guard on you two until Castiel and your brother arrive here. After that, I'm afraid we'll have no further use for you…"

"Since when were angels murderers?" Julie snapped.

"We kill only those who deserve it," the angel said gravely. "Those who lie, those who cheat and steal, those who _kill,_" she added with a pointed look at them.

The two angels settled down to watch them, and Sam sighed. There was no way they were getting free with this close a guard on them. He put his head back in defeat and rested the back of his head against Julie's, trying not to think about the fact that this tough, funny, brave, wonderful girl he had known only a few days could be dead along with him, his brother, and Cas within a matter of minutes.

* * *

><p>"If that bitch so much as touched them-"<p>

"Dean, I'm pretty sure she touched them," Cas said gravely. "To capture them, she would probably have to touch them."

Dean stopped his ranting for a moment just to stare at his friend. "That's…that's not what I meant, Cas."

"Well, either way, she has Sam, and if you go in there, guns blazing as usual, she'll kill him," Castiel warned him.

"And Julie," Dean said. "She has Julie too."

"Right. Julie." Cas stared straight ahead as Dean sped to the house where the two people he loved most were being held, his face blank. For some reason, that reaction, on top of everything else going on sent him over the edge.

"What is it about her you don't like, Cas? Because she's great, you know," Dean snapped. "You haven't even given her a chance, and you already hate her!"

"Is this really the time, Dean?" Cas sighed, and Dean didn't reply. After a moment, Cas added quietly, "And I don't hate her."

Before Dean could reply, they arrived at the abandoned house. It was out in the middle of nowhere, where no one would expect to find people, and no one could hear you scream. Great.

Dean and Cas got out of the car. They had formed a plan on the way over, but it was a crazy, reckless plan, and there were about a million ways it could go wrong. Dean fingered the silver angel blade tucked inside his jacket, full of a nervous anger. All he wanted to do was burst in there and skin the angels who had his brother and girlfriend, but their lives depended on him and Cas playing along with these angels.

Dean kicked the door down, which wasn't hard. The house was old, falling apart in sections, and the hinges were weak. There was no point in being stealthy, and anyway, Dean wanted to hurt something, even if it was just a door.

"In here," the woman's voice from the phone call said from a different room. Dean's fists clenched and he took a step towards her voice, but Cas rested a hand on his shoulder. Dean let his friend go first and followed the angel into what was once a sitting room. Two people were sitting in the center of the room, tied to back-to-back chairs. Dean had to fight the urge to leap forward at the sight of the woman he loved and his baby brother tied to chairs, and he had to fight the urge to kill these sons of bitches when he saw the blood on Julie's neck and shoulder.

"Sammy…" Dean breathed as his eyes met his brother's. Sam didn't look afraid, just calm and steady. He gave Dean an almost reassuring look, and that was when Dean realized. At some point, his baby brother had grown into this man in his thirties, a tough, strong, calm, steady man who didn't need Dean to save him anymore. And Dean wasn't sure if that made him proud or sad.

Julie turned her head, and her name slipped out of his mouth before Dean could stop himself. He took a step towards her, and the female angel chose that moment to step in-between them.

"You came, Castiel," Rebekah said calmly.

Cas studied her sadly. "What has happened to you, to drive to you to this, Rebekah?" he sighed. "These people have done nothing to harm you. Leave them out of this. It is me you want, not them."

"This girl was asking about the hypocrite I smote," Rebekah said coldly, sweeping her hand towards Julie. "And I'm sure that the Winchester was making similar investigations. They were hunting us, Castiel, with the intention of killing us."

"We didn't want to kill you-" Sam tried.

"Quiet!" Jonah snapped. "Why else would you be after us, _hunter_?"

"We did wish to stop you, but we had no desire to kill you," Cas said as calmly as possible. "And I was the one who involved them. Do not blame these people for my mistakes, Rebekah. Your quarrel is with me. Please, just let them go…all three of them."

Rebekah approached Castiel and they stared each other down. "You're quite fond of these humans, Castiel," she said softly. "You care for them."

He didn't reply. "I cared for my brothers and sisters, Castiel," she said coldly. "The ones that died in the fall. The ones that died fighting here on earth in your civil war. The ones you slaughtered when you were _God_. Don't you think it only seems fair to take the ones you care about? What is it—an eye for an eye?"

Cas winced. "So he messed up a few times," Dean snapped, moving protectively next to his friend. "We all do. That doesn't give you the excuse to kill him and all of his friends."

"Watch your tone with me, Winchester," she snapped. "I see no reason to spare you, so you should be very, very careful."

"Not exactly my strong point," Dean smirked cockily, and her eyes flashed.

"Bekah…" Jonah said carefully. "Castiel is not wrong. These humans…they're not part of this. You got what you wanted, you got him. Why…why not let them go?"

Rebekah shot him a look. "These humans are with Castiel, Jonah. They will only attempt to kill us if we do not kill them first."

"You're not wrong," Dean snapped, and before the angel could react, he pulled out his angel blade and drove it into her heart.

"Rebekah!" Jonah cried, as Castiel snapped, "Dean, wait!"

Jonah whipped out his blade and pressed it hard against Sam's neck. Dean froze, just now seeing the big gaping hole in his plan. His brother swallowed, taking shallow breaths to keep from cutting himself on the blade. As for Jonah, the distraught angel was frozen, staring at Rebekah's fallen body.

"Jonah, I am sorry it had to come to that, but please, do not cause any more bloodshed," Cas said as gently as he could.

"You killed her!" Jonah snarled at Dean. "She…she was the only friend I had left!"

"She wasn't herself anymore, if she was killing humans," Cas said in the same soothing voice. "That was never our calling, and I think you know that, Jonah. It's our duty to protect humans, not kill them."

"But they can kill us?" Jonah cried, his eyes flicking from Dean to Rebekah.

Dean couldn't speak, just stare at his brother, one quick slice away from death. He couldn't do a single thing to save Sam, and any second that angel could go over the edge and kill his little brother.

"Jonah…I regret what Dean did, but he did not have much of a choice," Cas said slowly. "Rebekah had two of the people he loved most, and she was going to kill them. You know as well as I what it's like to lose those you love, and what someone will do to stop that from happening."

Jonah was breathing heavily, looking conflicted. "He killed my family," Jonah said quietly. "Why shouldn't I take his?"

"No!" Dean gasped, finally speaking. "No, no please…if you want to punish someone, punish me. Not him, please."

Jonah's hand was trembling, and Sam was pale. Every single one of them was silent, the entire room holding their breath to see what the angel would do.

"Jonah," Julie said softly, and the angel's wild eyes flicked to her. "I don't know you, and you don't know me. But you haven't done anything to make me believe that you don't have good intentions, even if you killed people and hurt me. Angels make mistakes as much as humans do. But please…Sam is a good man. And so is Dean, and so is Cas. Yes, they've made mistakes, but you're not exactly perfect yourself, are you? You didn't want to kill those humans, I don't think. But you were doing what you thought was right. And so were these men. They don't deserve to die, nor do you. So please…don't shed any more blood today." She swallowed, and he still hadn't moved. "Please?" she whispered.

Hands trembling, Jonah stepped away from Sam. The entire room took a collective breath, just relieved that he wasn't going to kill Sam. "I…" he said softly.

"Thank you," Julie whispered.

After a moment, Dean moved forward and cut the two of them free. He helped Julie to her feet, studying her shoulder. "It doesn't look too bad," he said, more to himself than her. "Are you alright, Jules?"

"Yeah," Julie said quietly, letting him pull her into a very careful embrace. She buried her head in his shoulder, and Jonah stared at them, looking almost guilty.

"I never meant to hurt anyone," Jonah said quietly, and Cas put a hand on his shoulder.

"Neither did I, brother," Cas sighed softly, and the five of them left the house in silence.

* * *

><p>"How's Cas doing?" Sam asked Dean.<p>

"He's alright, I think," the elder Winchester sighed, pouring himself a glass of vodka. "He's in one of the spare bedrooms."

"So Jonah's back in heaven then?" Sam asked, taking the bottle from Dean and pouring himself a glass.

"Cas's lieutenant, that Hannah chick, she's got an eye on him," Dean explained. "He seems to be doing better, though."

"I'm glad you didn't kill him," Sam sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"I'm glad he didn't kill you," his brother replied coldly.

"Yeah. You've got your girlfriend to thank for that. Without her and Cas to convince him, I'm pretty sure I'd be dead."

"And it would have been my fault," Dean muttered.

"Here we go," Sam snapped. "We're not starting this already Dean. You are not going to blame yourself for every bad thing that happens."

"Like you and Julie getting kidnapped because I split off from you guys, or my girlfriend getting hurt because I wouldn't get off the damn phone? Or my brother almost dying because I couldn't control myself?"

"See, that's exactly what you're _not _going to do," Sam replied. "How is Julie, anyway?"

"She's a lot better," another voice said, and they turned to see Julie approaching, a clean white bandage on her shoulder. She smiled fondly at the brothers and kissed Dean on the cheek. "Where's Cas, honey? I'd like to talk to him, if you don't mind."

"Take a left over there, he's the second door," Dean told her. She smiled at him again and followed his instructions.

Sam smirked. "'Honey'?"

"Shut up, bitch."

"Jerk."

Castiel was seated on the edge of the bed, deep in thought, when he heard a soft knock on the door. "Yes?" he called.

"Cas, it's…it's Julie. Do you mind if I come in?"

Cas stiffened slightly, but he called, "Not at all." The door opened and the pretty, young, blond woman entered. She studied him for a moment with sharp, big blue eyes and gave him the tiniest of smiles. "How are you?" she asked carefully.

"I am…alright," he said in an equally careful tone. His expression softened as he noticed the bandage on her shoulder. "How are you, Julie?"

"I'm okay," she said honestly. "That could have been a lot worse."

"It would have been, if you hadn't gotten through to him," Cas replied.

"It wasn't all me."

There was a long pause. Then she sighed. "Look, Castiel, I get it. I'm new, you don't know me. I don't know you either, but I've heard a lot about you. You've saved Dean's life, and Sam's, and you died for them on more than one occasion. You're Dean's best friend in the whole world, and he cares about you a lot, and I'd really like for you to like me. However, I also understand that you have no reason to like me, or even trust me really, and I guess I'm just asking that you…give me a chance."

To her surprise, Castiel smiled. "There's something I never really told Sam," he said. "Every once in a while, when I was missing Dean or concerned about him, I would find him for just a few minutes, to make sure he was alright." Julie blinked. "I watched him fall in love with you. I saw what you did for him." Cas sighed. "I care about Dean Winchester a lot, and I know you do too. He loves you, Julie Carters, and that's more than enough reason for me to like you."

"But before…" she said slowly, still confused.

"I…I'm not sure what was wrong with me," Cas sighed. "Jealousy, I suppose. Dean doesn't have a lot of people very close to him, and I think I was a little concerned that he no longer wanted some angel around, when he was very clearly happy with you. But…you're a good person, Julie. You make him happy, and that's more important than my…insecurities."

Julie smiled at Castiel. "Thank you for that," she said softly. "That means a lot. Now I just hope that I can get you to like me for me, and not because Dean does."

Cas chuckled. "I think we can make that work," he smiled. After a moment he said, "Would you like to watch television with me, Julie? I don't exactly know what's good, and I'd appreciate your input."

To his surprise, she grinned and plopped down next to him. "Just wait, Cas. I've got some shows you'll love, and if not, then at least I'll be entertained."

As she flicked through channels, Castiel allowed himself a small smile. His own selfish desires aside, this woman was a wonderful person. The kind of person Dean deserved. He was just glad that Dean had found someone who loved him, and who made him happy.

Castiel settled back against the pillows with that wonderful person, and within the hour, the two were chatting happily, making jokes, and laughing at the television. Sam and Dean came to investigate, and the four sat down together to watch together, four hurting, tragic people who had found others who loved them, who they could depend upon. A family.

And for that brief moment at least, they were happy.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

Officer Jim Morgan was having a bad day. He had woken up to his dog peeing on his foot, which would have been only a slightly annoying and extremely funny incident if he wasn't already ten minutes late to work. By the time he got to work, frazzled and still exhausted from working late into the night, his boss, Sheriff Anderson was pissed at him. Technically, Anderson was just pissed. Anderson was a big, beefy guy, good at his job, but angry at the world. He had never married, and he lived alone, which probably added to all of his anger, but today he had decided to focus all that rage on the unfortunate Jim Morgan, thirty-one, good-looking, good-natured Jim, good at his job and a nice enough guy who had just happened to be late that morning.

But that wasn't even the worst part. Over the past week, three men had gone missing, and yesterday, two of them had been found dead by a dumpster not far from the police station, completely drained of blood. Anderson had no leads, didn't even know what could have drained the bodies like they were, and not knowing made him angry. The whole police force was focused on this strange case, but because of Jim's lateness, he had gotten the worst job. While others got to go out and search for the place where the missing man, Jacob Lee, was, or got to flip through files, or got to take the bodies to the morgue, Jim got the worst job of all.

He got to deal with the feds.

They had called yesterday with the news of the third disappearance and said three agents would be coming to take over the investigation. Sheriff Anderson knew they could use the help, but he, like all small town cops, hated feds. The FBI swept in and took over your case, ignored all the hard work you did, and if they solved the case, they got all the credit. And it they didn't solve it, then no one blamed them. If the feds couldn't do it, no one could. As a rule of thumb, feds were dicks.

But Jim was willing to make an exception to that rule when the three agents entered the police station. There were two tall, classically handsome guys in suits, the kind of really good-looking guys that all other men immediately disliked. The taller one had longer hair framing his handsome face, and the shorter guy, still about six-two, had the absolutely unfair kind of face that made girls throw themselves at him. Jim wasn't a bad-looking guy himself, but these were the kind of guys who could easily beat him out, and they just had that air of arrogance and cockiness that made Jim immediately dislike them.

And then there was the other agent.

As handsome as these guys were, she was just as pretty. She was wearing a nice pantsuit, and somehow she looked sexy even in black slacks, a white button-down, and a jacket. She was plenty curvy, and she had shoulder-length blond curls, a very pretty face, and two of the prettiest blue eyes he'd ever seen. She, on the other hand, Jim liked immediately.

"You must be the agents who called yesterday," Jim said slowly, trying not to stare at the woman.

"That's us," Mr. Sexy over there said. He pulled a badge out of his suit jacket, and his two companions followed suit. "I'm Agent Johnson." He nodded at the shaggy-haired agent, saying, "That's Agent Black, and that's Agent Thorne."

Jim nodded. "I'm Officer Morgan," he said. "It's nice to meet you," he added, although he was really only addressing Agent Thorne. She smiled politely at him, and returned the smile. "I'll be catching you up on the case."

"Yeah, so you've had three disappearances?" Agent Black asked, putting away his badge and cocking his head curiously.

"So far," Jim admitted. "And two…they weren't disappearances. We found the bodies last night."

"Bodies?" Agent Thorne asked, concerned. "So they were murders, then?"

"Well…come see for yourself," Jim sighed.

He led the three agents to the morgue, where a buddy of his, Harry Cooper was sitting behind a desk, looking bored to tears. "Jimmy!" he said as they entered. "Who've you got?"

"The feds that called in yesterday," Jim shrugged. "I want to show them the bodies we found last night."

Harry chuckled. "I hope you guys don't scare easy, because that's some pretty weird shit in there."

The woman smirked, and Agent Black looked like he wanted to laugh. Agent Johnson raised his eyebrows, unimpressed. "Trust me, boys. Whatever you think is weird is an average day for us."

"Oh, really?" Jim smirked, not liking his superior attitude one bit. "Explain this for me then, agent."

He wheeled out one of the victims, pulling back the sheet to show his pale skin and what looked like several teeth marks in his skin. "We would guess animal attack, but this guy, and the other victim as well were both completely drained of blood. Now, tell me what does that, if you can."

"A vampire?" Johnson smirked, and Jim chuckled.

"Okay, now something real."

The three agents exchanged a look. "We're good now, officer," Johnson said. "We can take it from here."

Jim didn't like being dismissed, but he didn't really want to hang around that arrogant fed either. He left, shooting one last glance at Agent Thorne before shutting the door behind him.

"I'd hit that," Harry said without looking up once Jim shut the door.

"Which one, the short-haired pretty boy or the tall one?" Jim smirked.

Harry rolled his eyes. "Hilarious, Morgan. Seriously, if I had known the girls would be that fine, I would have totally been a fed."

Meanwhile, inside the morgue, Sam and Dean, for it was indeed them, were studying the first corpse, while Julie checked the other one. "Same thing, boys," she sighed. "Bite marks on the neck, and I don't feel like splitting him open, but I'm guessing he's been drained, too."

"Look at this," Sam muttered, studying the first victim's wrists. "He's got bruises on his wrists, like he was chained or something."

Julie checked her corpse. "Yep. Same here." She turned towards the brothers. "What do you think? Obviously it's vamps, but don't they usually just kill their victims, not chain them up?"

"Maybe they were saving them for later?" Dean guessed. "We've come across a couple nests that like to play with their food first."

"If that's the case, I'd hate to be that guy who went missing yesterday," Julie muttered, wheeling the second victim back into place.

"What's our next move?" Sam asked, putting the other corpse back.

"Well, I'd say we look for places nearby that could be a nest," Dean said.

"Great idea," Sam muttered. "Got any ideas on where we start?"

"I'd bet you that Morgan guy could be helpful," Dean pointed out.

"That's true," Julie said. "Bet that would be quite the conversation. 'Hey, officer. I was just wondering if you had any ideas if there's a place where vampires might be living nearby.'"

Sam smirked. "So, don't ask him like that," he chuckled. "Use your _feminine charms_."

"Excuse me?" Julie asked, amused.

"Yeah, what was that again?" Dean asked, less amused.

Sam was smirking even more now. "Oh, come on. He was totally checking Julie out. I'd bet he'd tell you anything if you hit on him a couple times."

"Good point," Julie smirked. "And he was kind of cute, too."

"Hold up," Dean protested. "I'm not sure I like this plan."

"I'm kidding, Dean," Julie laughed. "Trust me, I'm only into you." She winked at him as she walked away. "I'll be back, hopefully with answers."

Dean glared after her. Sam laughed. "Look, dude, she's not actually cheating on you. You know that, right?"

"You know how these past few weeks, we've been really busy hunting?" Dean sighed.

"Yeah, I guess," Sam shrugged.

"Well, we've been so busy that Julie and I haven't been having a lot of…alone time, if you know what I mean."

Sam winced. "So, basically, you're horny, that's what you're telling me."

"I have not done anything more than kiss my girlfriend in a week, Sammy," Dean sighed. "And not even a good kiss."

"You know, maybe she's really been cheating on you with Officer Morgan this whole time," Sam smirked. Dean punched his arm a little harder than necessary.

Meanwhile, Julie found Jim Morgan back in the lobby and they talked for a while. Julie hit pretty heavily on him, asking him about his personal life, hinting heavily that she was single, saying flirtatiously how good-looking he was. Normally, Jim was a pretty down-to-earth guy, but her flirting really went to his head. He was floating on such a high from her obvious interest in him that when she began to ask slightly suspicious questions about abandoned houses or barns and other places on the outskirts of town, he gave her several addresses without thinking twice.

When Julie rejoined Sam and Dean, she flicked a piece of paper with several addresses at them, smirking. "Boobs, boys," she said cockily. "They can get you very far in life."

Sam grinned and rolled his eyes, but Dean seemed a lot less amused. Especially when they rejoined Jim Morgan, and he and Julie struck up an easy, flirty conversation. Dean really lost it when Jim asked with a smirk, "So, Agent Thorne-"

"Please, call me Julie," she insisted, smiling at him.

"Julie," Jim amended with a grin. "Well, Julie, what time do feds get off work. Is it a never-ending sort of job or more of the nine-to-five variety?"

"My job is over when this case is either solved or declared unsolvable," she replied with a smirk. "But, if the nights get slow, well…"

"I'll call you," Jim said cockily, and Sam knew it was time to stop this flirting before Dean broke somebody's nose.

Sam quickly pulled Jim away to go look up something or other. Dean didn't really care. He grabbed Julie's arm and dragged her over to an empty section of the police station, by the bathrooms.

"Dean, what is wrong?" Julie hissed, pulling her arm away.

"What is going on with you and this Morgan guy?" Dean snapped.

Julie laughed. "You're joking. You don't actually think I'm serious, do you?"

"You got the information, so you can cut the act now, right?" Dean said coldly.

"We never know when we could use his help, Dean, so I'm keeping up the act," Julie snapped. "Because that's what it is. An _act_."

"Hey, if the nights get slow though, at least he can call you," Dean muttered. "You gave him your number?!"

Julie stared at him for a long moment. "This isn't really about Jim, is it?"

"Oh, he's _Jim_ now?"

"Oh, calm _down_, Dean!" Julie snapped. "There is nothing going on there, and you know it! Now, what is this really about?"

Dean sighed, and some of the fight went out of him. "I don't know, Jules. Things have been so crazy busy lately, and, well…I don't know. I guess I just…miss you."

"_That's_ what this is about?" Julie asked in a much more gentle voice, stepping closer to him. "Dean…I'm with you literally twenty-four-seven."

"Yeah, I know, it's just…I miss just _us_ time."

"You mean you miss sex," Julie smirked. Dean opened his mouth to protest, but Julie gave him another look, and he gave up. He went for a winning smile, and thankfully it worked.

"You know, since we've spent over a week sleeping in the same hotel room as your brother, that would be a little weird," Julie pointed out with a smirk.

"Sam's not here right now," Dean replied, putting his hands on her waist.

"Yeah, and we're also kind of in a police station pretending to be FBI-" She was cut short by Dean kissing her. For a moment, she melted and kissed him back, wrapping her arms around him and pressing as close as she could to him.

Dean pressed Julie's back against the wall, kissing her almost hungrily. Suddenly, it wasn't enough, and he pushed open the men's bathroom door and dragged her in.

"You're kidding," she panted, looking around.

In response, he picked her up and hitched her legs around his waist. Julie gave up and let Dean kiss her neck while she worked his tie off. He pressed her up against the wall and got her jacket off within a few seconds. She pulled Dean's jacket off as well and they both were working on unbuttoning each other's shirts, kissing each other's lips, necks, cheeks, ears, and jaws when the bathroom door opened.

Neither of them realized for a moment, until a man cleared his throat.

Julie and Dean froze, and then slowly looked over at the doorway. Jim Morgan stood there, his expression cool and unreadable. "Glad to see you're behaving professionally," he said drily, glancing from their jackets and Dean's tie on the floor to their half-unbuttoned shirts and position. He left without another word.

For a moment, neither of them moved. "Well, that was awkward," Dean muttered, and then Julie started to laugh. Soon, the both of them were laughing as they quickly got dressed again. Dean stopped Julie before she could leave and kissed her one last time.

"When we get back to the motel, we are getting a separate room and finishing that," he warned her, and she shook her head, smiling.

* * *

><p>"Hurry back," Julie muttered into the phone. "I know we decided I'd stay behind, but avoiding Jim is getting increasingly harder."<p>

Dean chuckled. "So you don't think you're going home with Officer Morgan anymore?" he smirked, tucking his phone between his ear and shoulder as he helped Sam force open the door of an abandoned barn on the outskirts of town open.

"Watch yourself, Winchester," his girlfriend said darkly, but he just chuckled, and he could imagine her face softening.

"Just keep us posted on any developments," Dean said. "If they find that other missing guy, Jacob Lee or whatever, or if somebody else goes missing-"

"I'll call," she sighed. "Go kill some vampires, honey."

Dean smirked. "I'll try. Talk to you later."

He hung up, and Sam turned to smirk at him. "What? No 'Love you, honey'?"

"I am not afraid to beat your ass, Sammy," Dean said, giving him a warning look, but Sam just laughed. Dean sighed and turned to enter the abandoned barn.

Then someone screamed.

The two brothers whirled around, gripping their handy machetes. "Hello?" a woman's voice wailed. "Is somebody there? Help me!"

Dean edged around the corner of the barn and saw a young woman who looked to be in her twenties stumbling towards them. There was blood on her white blouse, and she looked terrified, her dark hair tangled and dark eyes wild.

"Help!" she shrieked when she saw Dean, and he moved towards her suspiciously.

"What's wrong?" he asked gruffly. "Are you hurt?"

"I…I was looking for my boyfriend," she said shakily. Sam joined them, keeping an eye out for attackers. "Jake…he's been missing since yesterday."

"Miss, I need you to calm down," Dean said firmly. "My partner and I, we're investigating your boyfriend's disappearance. Now, I need you to tell me what's wrong."

"I was…I went inside that barn, trying to find him," she said breathlessly. "And then—is that a machete?!"

"Oops," Dean muttered, trying to hide it behind his back. Sam did the same, but it was too late. "Are you guys going to kill me?!" she wailed.

"No! No, miss, we're not going to hurt you," Dean said quickly. She sobbed until he finally threw down his machete and kicked it away. "Look!" he snapped, holding his hands up in surrender. "We're not going to hurt you."

Sam followed suit. "We're here to help," he said gently.

The young woman stared at them for a moment, and then suddenly grinned. "Bad move, boys," she laughed.

Dean's blood ran cold. He turned to dive for his machete and found himself staring right at a pretty woman with long blond curls, wearing very short shorts, a cut-off tank top, and flashing vampire teeth. She held up a long knife and rested the tip on his heart. "Hello, Dean…" she said slowly, grinning. "How kind of you to join the fun."

Sam winced as two female vampires twisted his arms behind his back and pushed him towards the barn. One had choppy, short, bright red hair and there was blood on her tattered army jacket. The other one, a tall, black, Amazonian-type teasingly brushed Sam's hair out of his face when he stumbled. "Careful, Jade," the black vampire smirked. "We don't want to bruise such a nice specimen."

Everything in Dean wanted to cut these bitches up for putting their hands on Sam, but he was a little preoccupied with the blond in front of him, and the "victim" they had been about to help. "What do we do with them, Scarlett?" the vampire who had tricked them asked, studying Dean with big, clever dark eyes.

"Let's have some fun, Tasha," this Scarlett vampire smirked, stepping too close to Dean. "It's not every day we catch the Winchester's…"

The two vampires forced him into the dark barn, digging the tip of Scarlett's knife into the small of his back. Tasha left him to Scarlett and disappeared into the darkness. A moment later, light went up to reveal…well, not what Dean was expecting.

The place was pretty well-lit for a vampire nest. There were a few beds spread around the barn, the fancy, plush kind of beds you saw in mansions and pornos. More concerning were the chains dangling from the walls. There was an Asian young man dangling from chained wrists in one corner, and he lifted his head when the lights went up. His eyes widened, seeing the vampires had brought home new victims, and Jacob Lee, for Dean was sure that was him, gave them a pathetic look.

"Well, at least this is nicer than the last nest we took out, huh, Sammy?" Dean smirked.

"Those psychos in Washington?" Sam replied with a smirk, glancing over at his brother. "The nest looked like a bad set from a cheap horror film."

"And they weren't even hard to kill," Dean chuckled. "There were what, four of them?"

"There were seven, but you only killed four of them," Sam replied, keeping up their lighthearted banter. "I took out the rest."

"Right," Dean smirked. He locked eyes with the blond vampire pinning his arms. "Killing four vamps? That's nothing."

"Scary," she smirked back. "But I think you'll find us a little harder to kill, handsome."

Scarlett waved her hand lazily, and the two vampires pinning his brother forced him down slightly so the black one could prepare to bite his neck. "Hey! Leave him alone!" Dean yelled angrily.

"That's just to make sure you don't try anything stupid," Scarlett said soothingly. She let go of him, but he couldn't fight her with Sam a swift bite away from death.

"Take your jacket off," Scarlett said after a moment.

"You're kidding me, right?" Dean smirked.

"She's not, pal," Jacob Lee groaned. "You're going to want to play along."

"I am not giving anyone a lap dance, just to be clear," Dean snapped, pulling off his suit jacket and throwing it at Scarlett's feet.

She pouted. "Oh, don't be like that," she said teasingly, and the other vampires laughed. She moved closer to Dean and started undoing his tie. Everything in him wanted to kill this monster and raise some hell, but there was Sam a few feet away, a vampire a second away from ending his life. As long as his brother was in danger, Dean could do nothing but stand there and let Scarlett pull his tie off and undo a couple buttons of his dress shirt.

Sometimes, having good looks like Sam and Dean had paid off, when you could just walk into a bar and pick up the hottest girl there pretty easily. And sometimes, like now for instance, captured by some pretty horny female vamps, they would be better off as average-looking guys.

Scarlett took a long, deep breath, drinking in the smell of Dean's blood. She grinned a shark's grin at him and smirked, "You smell _delicious,_ hunter."

The next moment, she and the other vampire holding him, Tasha, were pushing him against the wall, forcing him to his knees and chaining his wrists in place. Dean felt pretty useless as the other two vampires pulled off his brother's jacket and tie and forced him to his knees next to Dean.

"We've got quite the haul today, don't we, ladies?" the redheaded vampire, Jade, smirked. "I'm still pretty full from Bill last night," she sighed almost longingly. "Anybody else hungry?"

"Hank was pretty filling," Scarlett smirked, rubbing her toned stomach. "Tasha? Olivia?"

Tasha giggled. "I just got a snack from Jake." She winked at the two brothers and added, "But don't worry, boys. I'll be hungry soon. Or should I say thirsty…?"

"I could eat," the black vampire, Olivia, shrugged, and without another word suddenly she was crouching over Sam, pulling his head back by his hair, and then Sam was moaning in pain.

"Hey!" Dean cried, pulling at the chains holding his wrists. "Get off him! Leave him alone, bitch!"

After a few seconds, the vampire pulled away from Sam and grinned at Dean, her teeth stained red. Sam groaned as he lifted his head, and Dean's stomach flipped at the sight of his brother's bloody neck.

"You're going to pay for that," Dean snarled in his lowest, most dangerous voice.

They all laughed again. Scarlett bent a little to run her hand through Dean's hair, and he suppressed a shudder. "Don't worry, pretty boy," she smirked. "We'll be back for you soon…"

The vampires went into another room of the barn, tittering and discussing how Sam tasted. Dean's fists were clenched so hard he was losing feeling in them. "I'll kill every last one of those bitches, I swear to god…"

"Good luck with that," the other man, Jacob Lee said flatly. "Hank used to be like you, pal. He was going to get out of here and get his revenge on these…these vampires. And now, well…let's just say they got to him first."

Dean didn't reply. He shifted as close as possible to Sam, who was breathing heavily, and asked softly, "You okay, Sammy?"

"I…yeah," his brother sighed. "It wasn't a bad bite. I'm guessing these vamps are pretty good at keeping their victims alive for a while."

"How do you guys know them?" Jacob Lee asked suspiciously.

"We don't," Sam said. "I'd never seen them until one of them pretended to be a victim so the others could get the jump on us."

"But they know who you are," Jacob pointed out.

Dean snorted. "Well, every monster who's been around for a while knows who we are, _pal_."

Jacob blinked. "Wait. You mean there's more than just these ones?"

"A lot more," Dean explained. "And not just vampires. Werewolves, ghosts, shape shifters, demons, angels…you name it, we've probably killed it."

"Are you messing with me?" Jacob said suspiciously.

"How is it anymore hard to believe that there are werewolves than vampires?" Dean pointed out.

"Aw, man, I'm literally living in a Twilight book," Jacob Lee moaned, and both Winchester's smirked.

"Not exactly," Dean said. "These vamps sure aren't drinking animal blood, and I doubt they're really looking to fall in love."

Sam turned his bloody head to stare at his brother. "How do you know that much about Twilight?" he smirked.

"Shut up," Dean muttered, glaring at him.

Jacob looked back and forth between them, and asked suggestively, "So…are you two…?"

Sam's eyebrows shot up in surprise and amusement, and Dean groaned and leaned his head back against the wall. "We're _brothers_," he said in the exasperated tone of a man who was all too used to being mistaken for his brother's boyfriend.

"Oh, just making sure," Jacob said quickly.

"I've got a girlfriend," Dean added, just to be sure. "Speaking of which…shit. Julie's going to flip when she realizes we're missing."

Sam glanced over at him, concerned. "How long do you think it'll take for her to figure out…?"

"An hour or two? She's pretty sharp."

"Shouldn't be too hard to find us," Dean said almost hopefully. "As long as she doesn't go rushing in and lose her head…"

"These…_vampires _will kill any help you've got coming," Jacob muttered darkly. "Face it, guys. We're not getting out of here."

"Cheer up, Jake," Dean smirked. "We've been in plenty worse situations than this."

"I highly doubt that," the other man smirked.

Sam and Dean exchanged a look. "Forty years in hell makes this look like a picnic, don't you think, Sammy?" Dean said coolly. Jacob Lee gave them a disbelieving look, and then his eyes widened when he saw they were dead serious.

For an hour or so, Sam and Dean worked tirelessly, trying to get out of their chains, but there was no point. By the time Dean finally gave up and flopped back against the wall, the vampires returned, Olivia and Jade taking swigs out of beer bottles and laughing raucously.

"Hope you boys weren't too lonely without us," Scarlett smirked. She knelt down in front of Dean, her hazel eyes locking with his green ones. He gave her a look so full of hatred and anger most people would have folded under it. Instead, she just smirked and forced his head to the side. She inhaled deeply again. "Mm. I'm honored. Not many girls get to drink from a Winchester…"

And before Dean could try to throw her off, she sank her teeth into his neck. There was a stabbing pain, and then a strange sore, aching pain as she drank his blood. For a moment, Dean flashed back to a time in his life where he had been turned into a vampire for a brief spell. He remembered the burning need to feed, the thirst for blood. It sickened him to think once he had been like this monster.

Eventually she pulled away and wiped her bloody mouth on her hands. She cleaned her hands with his shirt as he struggled to get his head to quit spinning.

He closed his eyes and tried to block out the laughing, jeering vampires and his brother's concerned, angry exclamations. Just make it all go away. Let him sleep…

Scarlett jerked his head upright and he was forced to open his eyes and glare at her. "Don't give up on me yet, Dean," she smirked. "We're just getting started…"


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

Jim was having a really, really bad day.

His boss was pissed at him, they were making zero progress on the case, his dog had peed on him, all that crap. And now to top it all off, the funny, sexy FBI agent he had been really into, and who had seemed really into him, was playing him. Either that or she was playing Agent Johnson, and judging by the fact that they were tearing each other's clothes off in the men's bathroom, he would guess that he was the one she had been fooling.

He hadn't seen Julie Thorne since that incident, and he was kind of okay with that. He didn't want to have to face her and realize what a total idiot he was, _again._ Agents Johnson and Black had gone off to investigate and she had stayed behind, but they were doing a great job of avoiding each other in the small police station.

At least until the door to his office opened and she walked in, uninvited.

He cleared his throat. "Agent Thorne," he said carefully. "Can I help you?"

"Look, we both know that I was using you earlier, and I'm sorry about that," she said quickly, not one to beat around the bush. "That was pretty awful of me. But I need you to move on past that, just long enough for you to help me."

Jim wanted to still be pissed at her, but she looked truly concerned. He sighed. "What do you need help with?"

"I haven't been able to get ahold of my fellow agents for almost two hours," Julie Thorne said. "And before you tell me not to worry, that's very serious. They were investigating the addresses you gave me, and I think they might be in trouble."

"What do you need me for?" he asked, still not comprehending, although he was a little concerned now.

"They took the car," she admitted. "So I kind of need a ride. But I want you to help me find them. I know it's a lot to ask but they're…they're my coworkers, as well as my friends, and I don't want anything to happen to them."

"Just your friends?" Jim muttered, and she didn't reply. He sighed and gave in, standing up and heading towards the door. "Well, come on. I've got a cop car out back. And if you're really lucky, I'll even let you use the sirens and the flashy lights."

Julie smiled despite herself as Jim led her out to the parking lot. She was in love with Dean, and no other guy could compare to him or take his place. Still, this guy was nice, and funny, and a good, brave, competent cop, and he wasn't too bad-looking either. He was the kind of guy she would have maybe been interested in, if it weren't for Dean.

It was a twenty minute drive to the barn where Sam and Dean had been when Julie last spoke to them. For the first couple minutes of the drive, there was an awkward silence, but eventually Jim's phone went off and he pulled over to the side of the road to read it, brow furrowed. After a moment, he looked up and asked, "So, these guys. Have you known them a while?"

"Well…I've known Agent Johnson almost a year, and I've only known Agent Black a couple of months, but he's a great guy," Julie said carefully, but also truthfully. "If something happened to them…"

Jim turned to Julie and put his hand on hers. "Hey," he said gently. "They'll be okay."

Julie looked up and gave him a brief smile, and then suddenly he was closing a handcuff on her wrist. She just stared at him as he handcuffed her to the dashboard and gave her a cold look. "Jim, what-?" she started, completely surprised and confused by this change of events.

"I looked you and your 'friends' up," Jim Morgan snapped. "There is no Julie Thorne or Dean Johnson in the system. There is a Sam Black, but he's five-six and, in fact, black." Julie stared at him, trying to think fast and coming up blank. "You're not FBI," he said coldly. "I don't know what you're up to, but I am taking you in right now, and we'll figure out what to do with you there."

"No!" Julie gasped, snapping to her senses. "Jim, please, you can't do that!"

He smirked. "Pretty sure I can."

"Jim, please," she said desperately. "You're right, I lied. I'm not an FBI agent. But I wasn't lying about my friends. Please, I think they're in a lot of trouble, and I can't let something happen to them. At least give me a chance to explain!"

Jim Morgan stared at her for a long second. "You've got two minutes to convince me before I haul your ass back to the station," he snapped.

"Thank you," she sighed. "Okay, so my name's not Julie Thorne, it's Julie Carters. Those guys that were with me…that's Sam and Dean Winchester. They're brothers, and Dean is my boyfriend of almost a year." Jim nodded a little to himself. Of course a guy like that would get a girl like her.

"This is going to sound crazy, but this is our job," she continued. "This is what we do, we investigate murders and disappearances like this that the government can't explain. I know you probably won't believe me, and you'll think I'm crazy, but we think that…well, we think a vampire or more than one is killing these people."

Jim blinked. Then he smirked. "Okay, you almost had me," he chuckled. "Alright, we're going to jail now-"

"No! No, Jim, please, you have to believe me," Julie said, and he was surprised to see real honesty and fear in her eyes. "Look…I care a lot about Sam, and I love Dean. I cannot lose these guys. So please, just…give me a chance. You can turn us in if I'm lying, just please…let me save them." Jim stared at her, looking conflicted, so she whispered, "Please. _Please_, I can't lose them."

After a long pause, Jim sighed. "I'm going to let you out of those handcuffs," he explained. "If you try to run, I'll knock you out and you can forget about finding those guys."

"I'm not going anywhere," Julie said firmly, and he unlocked her wrist.

Jim sighed again. "Okay. Let's find those lying bastards," he muttered. Julie gave him a look, and he corrected, "Sorry. Let's find your lying _friends_."

* * *

><p>Sam suppressed a groan as the vampire crouching over him pulled away from his neck. He was extremely lightheaded from blood loss, and yet these vamps had only been toying with them for an hour or so. The dark-haired vampire in front of him, Tasha, wiped her mouth and smacked her lips. "You're right, he's pretty tasty too," she sighed. "And a real pretty boy, too…"<p>

She brushed her fingers along his cheek, leaving a smear of his own blood. Sam spat at her, hitting her square on the cheek, and he was gratified that Dean had the strength to laugh.

"Thatta boy, Sammy," his brother chuckled weakly. Tasha glared at him for a moment, wiping off her cheek, and then hissed, opening her mouth to reveal what looked like shark teeth.

Sam tensed, waiting for the vampire to leap on him and kill him, but their leader, Scarlett, laid a perfectly manicured hand on Tasha's shoulder.

"That's enough, you two," she said with a smirk, and Tasha stepped away from Sam, although she still looked murderous. Sam wondered what it was about this pretty blond vampire that made the others obey her without question.

"So what do you think, Tash?" Scarlett sighed. "Which do you prefer?"

Tasha looked thoughtfully between the two chained, pissed brothers. "Hmm…I'm going to have to go with Dean," she said, winking at him.

Dean smiled sarcastically. "I'm flattered, sweetheart. No, really, thank you. I'm glad you'd rather eat me than these other guys. It's what every guy wants to hear."

Sam almost smirked. "I'd have to go with Sammy," Olivia sighed dreamily, giving him a seductive look. Sam bit back a few choice words and just glared at her.

"Jade?" Scarlett asked, amused.

"Jake's blood is a bit thinner now, but I'd have to go with him," she said after a moment. "Sorry, boys."

"Bummer," they muttered simultaneously.

"What about you, Scar?" Olivia asked. The other vamps looked to their leader eagerly.

Scarlett looked thoughtfully around. She approached Sam and he tensed. She bent and touched his bloody neck, causing him to wince, and next to him Dean jerked on the chains holding him and swore quietly. Scarlett slowly tasted the blood on her finger, then walked over to Dean.

Sam's stomach clenched at the sight of his brother chained to a wall, his neck and half-buttoned shirt bloody. If there was anything worse than being chained up and toyed with and having your blood sucked by vampires, it was having the same thing done to your brother.

She dipped her finger in the blood on his neck and tasted it, then grinned. "Sorry, Liv. I'd say Dean wins this round."

"Lucky me," Dean muttered, and Scarlett smiled.

The next second, she was sinking her teeth into his neck. Dean cried out in pain before he could stop himself, and Sam struggled violently against his chains. "Hey! _Hey_! Don't hurt him, _stop it_, you-"

"Get the hell away from my boyfriend before I kill you," a deadly calm, cold voice said from the doorway of the barn, and everyone froze.

Scarlett whipped around, her chin and mouth red with Dean's blood, and Dean put his head back against the wall, breathing heavily, eyes closed. But Sam had eyes for only Julie, who stood several yards away, holding a machete and wearing the most dangerous, pissed expression he had ever seen on her pretty features.

"Who is this?" Scarlett snarled, standing in-between Dean and Julie, which was a very dangerous place to be.

"Julie Carters," she said calmly. "I'm a hunter, and I would kindly ask that you step away from him before I make you."

The vampires exchanged a look, and then laughed. "What are you going to do, sweetie?" Scarlett called teasingly. "There's four of us and one of you, and to top it off, we've got three victims I'm sure you wouldn't want us to hurt any further, isn't that right?"

"I'm giving you one chance to let these men go and leave here and never return," Julie said slowly. "Otherwise…I will kill you, I can promise you that."

"How about…no?" Scarlett smirked.

"Suit yourself," Julie shrugged, and in the next second she had raised a gun and fired on Olivia, who was standing near Sam. The vampire howled and crumpled, and when she fell, Sam saw a dart sticking out of her chest. Dead man's blood. This girl was good.

Jade howled and leapt at Julie, but she swung her machete and in one quick, swift, neat movement, Jade's head left her shoulders.

However, Tasha had gotten behind Julie and before the hunter could turn around, the vampire grabbed her arm and twisted it painfully behind her back until Julie gasped and was forced to drop her machete.

Tasha yanked Julie's head to the side, leaving her neck exposed. "No!" Sam cried desperately, trying to help her but getting pulled back by his chains. Dean lifted his bloody head and even though he was weak, he still managed to look horrified at the sight of Julie an inch from death.

Scarlett moved away from Sam and Dean and approached Julie. "Kill her," the leader of the vampires spat, and Tasha growled, her mouth stretching wide to reveal her vampire teeth.

"Jules…" Dean cried weakly, as helpless as Julie was.

Thankfully, Julie hadn't come alone.

Tasha was stopped literally dead in her tracks as her head was taken clean off her shoulders. Jim Morgan stood there, holding a bloody machete and looking absolutely shocked at what he had done. Julie whirled around, looking for Scarlett, but the leader of the vampires had disappeared the moment she realized she would lose the fight. "Dammit," Julie muttered before quickly rushing over and finishing off Olivia before the vampire could get back up.

"You…weren't lying," Jim Morgan breathed, looking around, white and shocked.

"No, I wasn't," Julie muttered.

"Hey! Officer! Somebody, get me out of here!" Jacob Lee cried, rattling his chains. Jim moved to help him, while Julie turned to the Winchesters.

"Are you guys alright?" she breathed, taking in for the first time the blood on their shirts and necks.

"We're okay, thanks to you," Sam assured her.

She smiled genuinely at him, and then knelt down in front of Dean. "Oh, god…Dean, honey, are you…?" she asked in a horrified voice, trailing off as she took in the blood all over him and his pale skin.

Dean raised his head and gave her a weak smile. "I'll be fine, Jules. Although we both would have died without you."

"And me!" Jacob Lee snapped, and they turned to see him standing shakily, pale from blood loss. Jim tossed Julie the keys, and she nodded gratefully. Julie quickly unchained Dean, and he collapsed into her gentle embrace. For a long moment they held each other, Julie being careful not to brush her head against his wounded, still bleeding neck.

Jim unchained Sam, and he rubbed some life back into his arms. The officer helped Sam up as Julie helped a shaky Dean to his feet. "We should get going before she comes back," Sam pointed out, and the others nodded.

"We need to get you guys some medical attention," Julie said, slipping into nurse mode. "I don't think you two have lost too much blood, but Mr. Lee here is probably in worse shape. He'll need hospital attention-"

"Don't you think that's for a medical expert to decide?" Jim Morgan said uncertainly.

"Good thing I've been to medical school and worked as a nurse for two years," Julie replied coolly.

Jacob turned to Dean. "That's your girlfriend?" he asked.

"Yeah."

"Where can I find another one?"

Julie started to smirk, but her smile faded as she heard sirens approaching. Dean and Sam both tensed and looked up as three police cars pulled up to the barn. Julie whirled on Jim. "What the hell?!" she cried.

"I'm sorry," he said, and he sounded like he genuinely meant it. "I didn't realize you really were being honest. So…I called backup."

"The hell is this about?" Dean snapped, instinctively stepping back as the sheriff got out of his car. He had been arrested countless times, gone to jail repeatedly, and been on the FBI's most wanted list so many times it wasn't even funny. The thought of going to yet another prison was not something he was too thrilled about…

"Jim kind of realized we weren't really FBI," Julie said carefully, shifting into a defensive stance in-between the approaching police and Sam and Dean.

Jim saw her move and sighed. "Look, Julie, I really am sorry about this. But please…don't make this harder on yourself. Since you were honest about this whole situation, I think I should be able to help get you out within a couple days if you just work with me."

"And Sam and Dean?" she asked. He didn't reply or meet her glare, confirming her suspicions. Julie turned to Dean, who was staring down the sheriff. "Hey, Dean, how long does someone go to jail for assaulting a cop?"

"Depends," Dean rattled off without thinking. "If you hit him and knock him out and run, versus just hitting him and maybe causing a bruise-"

"Time frame, please, sweetie."

"Could be years-"

Before Dean could even finish his answer, Julie had slugged Jim Morgan so hard he fell flat on his butt, nose gushing blood. Sam, Dean, and Jacob stared at her as she smirked, "As long as my boys are going in the slammer, might as well join them."

Dean shook his head and grinned. He put his arm around Julie and kissed her head. "God, I love you, Jules," he said as the officers moved forward to arrest them.

* * *

><p>"Does it burn with silver?" Dean asked in a distant, bored voice.<p>

"Nope," Sam answered in the same flat tone.

"Um…does beheading it work?" Julie asked, clearly as disinterested as the brothers.

"Guess again."

"Can you kill it with fire?" Dean guessed, absently rubbing a strand of Julie's hair between his fingers.

"Yeah."

"Wendigo," Dean said confidently. Sam nodded. "Yahtzee!" Dean said triumphantly, and Julie rolled her eyes.

They were a funny sight, three people in handcuffs sprawled around a small jail cell. Sam sat on the metal bench, the sleeves of his bloody shirt rolled up, picking absently at the sterile bandage on the side of his neck. Dean lay sprawled on the floor, his arm around Julie a little awkwardly, due to his handcuffs. Julie was snuggled close to him, resting her head on his chest, absently playing with the silver chains on his hands. They were about the most calm, collected prisoners to ever be in this cell, as comfortable in a jail cell as most people were in their own homes.

"Your turn then," Sam sighed.

"Alright…I've got mine," Dean said after a moment.

"It's a vampire," Julie and Sam said simultaneously, and he frowned.

"How did you-?"

"That's been your answer the past three times!" Julie complained.

"Well, maybe that's because that's the monster that used me as their personal chew toy just a few hours ago!" Dean snapped.

"Julie, go," Sam said, ignoring his bitching brother.

"Got it," she said after a moment.

"Iron?"

"Nope."

"Salt?" Dean guessed.

"Nice try."

"Silver?" Sam sighed, rattling through the basics.

"Guess again," she replied.

"Angel blade?" Dean guessed, and Julie hesitated to answer. "Angel!" Dean cried triumphantly, and Sam and Julie rolled her eyes. "I win again!" he chuckled.

"Just pick something," Sam snapped, and a moment later Dean said, "Ready."

"I swear to god, if the answer is vampire, you are getting no sex for a week!" Julie growled, and Dean quickly said, "Wait, just kidding, I still need to think."

Jim Morgan backed away from their cell, shaking his head. He had sneaked past his fellow officers to check on the hunters, expecting angry people trying to escape. Instead, he found the three calmest prisoners he had ever seen, completely at ease, sprawled around a cell, playing some game about how to kill monsters. Anyone would think they were insane, but the worst part was, he knew they weren't. Well, at least not about the monsters.

Jim backed away, and returned to the main office. It was night, and there were three other officers besides him and Sheriff Anderson, waiting for the real FBI to come and take these three people away. Jim couldn't help feeling a little guilty, even though he was carrying out his job. They had broken the law and they had to face the consequences, even if they did seem like nice enough people who really had been trying to do the right thing…

He sighed. This was ridiculous. He had never felt so guilty about arresting someone. Maybe it was Julie's expression when she realized Jim had betrayed them. Maybe it was the way he had seen her rush to Dean Johnson…no, Winchester, the concern in her eyes, the way they held each other…once they went to jail, they wouldn't see each other again for god knows how long. Most likely though it was his conversation with Julie in the car as she pleaded with him. She loved him, she had said. Jim hadn't truly loved someone since…well, he had never loved someone. Not like she loved him. And he didn't want to be the one responsible for ruining that.

Someone walked into the police station. Jim didn't look up, not wanting to have to look at the men who were coming to take away the people he had turned in. But then one of his fellow officers, Kyle Simmons asked, "How can we help you, miss?"

Jim looked up, surprised, and a cold wave of panic swept over him. A pretty, scantily-clad, blond woman stood in front of the desk Kyle sat at, smiling seductively at him. Jim knew the second he saw her that she was the one vampire who had escaped, and he cried, "Kyle, no! Get away from her!"

The vampire's eyes flashed to him and she hissed, her lips curling back to reveal pointy teeth. Kyle cried out and scrambled back. Jim turned and ran into the other room, Kyle on his tail. Right as Jim reached the safety of another room, Kyle screamed, and Jim turned to see his coworker fall, the vampire tearing at his neck. For a moment, Jim was too terrified to move, and then he slammed and locked the door just before the vampire abandoned Kyle's body and lunged towards him.

Jim backed away from the door, horrified. Kyle was dead. That took a long moment to process, and then an almost blinding panic overtook him. He could very well be next, with that dangerous vampire loose in the police station.

Jim turned around and there were Anderson, his friend Harry, and the only female officer, Maggie Bloch, staring at him. "Did…did that woman just…?" Harry sad shakily.

"That's the thing that's been kidnapping and killing people," Jim told the shocked officers. "She just got Kyle, and if we don't fight back, she'll get us, too."

"We should be safe in here, right?" Maggie asked shakily.

"As long as that door stays locked, we'll be fine," Jim said, more hopeful than certain.

"What about those prisoners?" Anderson pointed out, and Jim's blood ran cold again.

* * *

><p>Dean was trying to braid Julie's hair when they head a man scream in pain. All three hunters sat straight up, immediately on high alert. They scrambled to their feet and backed up to the far wall of the cell, pressed shoulder to shoulder, waiting. "Do you think…?" Julie started quietly.<p>

"Scarlett," Dean said, and there was no question in his voice. "She doesn't seem like the type of bitch to just forgive and forget."

For a long, tense minute or two, they stood listening and waiting for a vampire to appear. After a couple of minutes, all three of them jumped slightly as someone started trying to force open the door to the room where all the prison cells were. Dean subtly tried to push Julie behind him, and then the door swung wide open.

"Jim?" Julie sighed in relief. "God, don't scare us like that!"

"There's a vampire," Jim Morgan gasped as he rushed to their cell. "Somewhere in here, that other vampire."

"We figured," Dean muttered. "Get us out of here, we'll take care of it."

Jim hesitated for a moment, looking conflicted. "For god's sake, let us save your life!" Julie snapped. Jim gave in and quickly unlocked their cell. The three hunters scrambled out and quickly found their weapons lying nearby. But just as Dean was enjoying the feeling of his good old machete back in his hands, the power went out.

"Son of a bitch," Dean muttered, finding Julie's arm in the dark. "Sammy?" he hissed.

"Right here," his brother breathed from a couple feet away.

"Get your back up against a wall and get ready to swing," Dean ordered the three other people, doing so himself. "Morgan, don't you guys have emergency power?"

"It'll take a couple minutes to kick in," Jim replied, feeling around for a wall and pressing his back to it. He tried to steady his breathing, but his heart was pounding so wildly he was certain that the vampire could hear it beating.

They waited in tense silence, trying to sense the vampire coming. But vampires were creatures of night, and they moved with such silence and stealth that no one heard Scarlett coming until it was too late.

Julie screamed next to Dean, and there was a thud in the darkness. "Jules!" he cried, but he couldn't dare risk swinging the machete if it could hit Julie instead. He waited in the darkness, hoping to hear Julie's voice or Scarlett's cry of pain, but he heard nothing.

After a few moments that seemed to last years, the lights finally flickered and came on, dimmer but before, but working at least. "No!" Dean cried, when he saw Julie lying on the ground, blood trickling from her forehead, and Scarlett standing over her, pressing Julie's machete to the unconscious woman's throat.

"One move and I'll kill her, Winchester," Scarlett smirked, gloating. "Like she killed my sisters."

Dean froze, staring in horror at Julie. He couldn't tell if she was breathing or not. Sam and Jim Morgan were frozen as well, unable to help Julie or kill this vampire before them. Scarlett grinned, enjoying their helplessness. She nudged Julie with her toe. "So," she smirked. "This is your girlfriend, huh, Dean?"

Dean didn't move or speak, just gritted his teeth.

"Do you love her?" Scarlett continued, grinning now. "Would you cry if I killed her?"

"Stop," Sam said in a voice so filled with pain it surprised Dean. "It's not her you want, not really. It's us."

"She killed my sisters," Scarlett snarled.

"Vampires killed her father," Sam replied, and Dean blinked. He didn't tell Sam that. How did he know that? Had Julie told him? "So she had a reason. Killing vampires is all she's ever known."

"You're still not explaining to me why I shouldn't slit this bitch's throat right here and now," she snapped.

"Because I'll surrender," Sam said, and both Dean and Scarlett blinked, surprised. "You leave her alone, promise not to hurt her, and I won't try to kill you. I'll do whatever you want, just leave her and the rest of these people out of it."

Scarlett studied him for a moment, and then laughed. "Dean, sweetie, I thought you were the boyfriend," the vampire smirked. "Yet it's Sammy here who is trying to save her, who is willing to take her place."

Dean gritted his teeth, unable to explain why those words bothered him so much. Before he could reply, though, he realized that Julie's eyes were open. She winked at him, and before he could even be stunned, she rolled over and stabbed a dart into Scarlett's leg.

The vampire shrieked as dead man's blood shot into her system, and Dean took his chance. He leapt forward and with one clean slice, he killed the last vampire.

Sam moved forward, and the two brothers helped Julie to her feet. "You okay?" Dean asked her, gently touching the spot on her head where she must have been hit, his fingers coming away bloody.

Julie nodded a couple of times and buried her face in his chest for a moment. When she pulled away, she turned to Sam and said, "Thanks for the distraction."

He nodded at her, smiling slightly. "Anytime."

"But that better have just been a distraction," Julie continued, giving him a sharp look. "I never want you, or Dean, or anyone taking my place in situations like that."

Sam shook his head. "Come on, Julie. We both would, without hesitating. And you know that."

Julie sighed. "I know. And I need to work on fixing that."

Sam chuckled, and Dean looked back and forth between them. He couldn't explain it, but something about that exchange had bothered him. He tried to ignore the strange emotion trying to crawl its way out of his stomach, and he turned to Jim Morgan. "Alright, Morgan. We took out your vampire. I'd say it's only fair if, in return, you _accidentally _let us go."

Jim sighed and smiled slightly. "Sure. That's twice I owe you three now. Just get out of here before my fellow officers get brave enough to risk coming out."

Sam and Dean gathered their stuff and headed for the door. Julie stopped for a moment and surprised Jim by giving him a brief hug. "Thank you," she said quietly, nodding at him.

Jim Morgan nodded back at this strange, tough, funny, brave, sweet, beautiful woman, and as he watched her walk away with those two men, Sam and Dean Winchester, he felt a pang of concern for her. Life with those two didn't seem very safe, and she was a good person, the kind who deserved to live a long, happy life.

Jim just hoped she got to live it, before a monster came along, one that they couldn't beat.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

"This is ridiculous," Julie laughed. "There is absolutely no way those Ringwraith's couldn't find the hobbits."

"What, you really think they could sense the Ring's presence from a whole three feet away?" Sam chuckled.

Dean shook his head as he watched them. His brother and girlfriend, sitting together on the couch, eating popcorn and mocking _The Fellowship of the Ring_. He'd be totally cool with being in there with them if they were just watching the movie. But, _no_, those two nerds had to compare it with the book!

Sam, Dean, and Julie had been living together here at the bunker for three months, although they spent most of their time in motel rooms on a hunt. They were having their first break from work in weeks, and the two were having a great time, marathoning Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. Sometimes it concerned him how nerdy his hot girlfriend could be.

More concerning was how well she got along with his brother. They had become close friends by the second hunt the three had done, and now they were the best of friends. They never fought, and they never seemed to run out of things to talk about. It was actually a little scary, how much the woman he loved was like his brother. They were both extremely smart, talented, hardworking people who could easily have had successful lives and careers if it weren't for hunting. They had similar interests, and not just hunting. They liked the same books and movies, and Dean often caught them trading books and discussing them afterwards. It was quite scary.

There was another thing that bothered him a little about the amount of time Sam and Julie spent together, although he tried to ignore it. It was the primal instinct any man felt when he saw another young, handsome guy with his girl. But it was Dean's brother, and he knew Sam would never do anything to hurt him. But every time they exchanged a look or smiled knowingly at each other or laughed at some inside joke, something deep inside him stirred angrily.

It was stupid, and he knew it. So he ignored it. Instead, he just focused on the positives. If Sam _didn't_ like Julie…now imagine how awkward that would be. This couldn't work, and he was so happy right now…he should just be grateful.

The phone rang, but Sam and Julie were far too engrossed in the movie to notice. Dean sighed and got it himself. "Hello?" he asked gruffly.

"Dean?"

Dean grinned. "Jasper! How are you?"

"I'm doing great, son," Julie's uncle said. "Well, actually, I was doing great until a couple of hours ago."

Dean frowned. "What happened?"

"I got a call. From Julie's grandmother."

"What happened? Is everything okay?"

"Oh, yeah, don't worry," Jasper said quickly. "Listen, can you put Julie on the phone? I should probably tell her this."

"Of course," Dean sad quickly. He covered the phone with his hand and yelled, "Julie? Jasper's on the phone, he's got something to tell you!"

A moment later, Julie appeared. "Thanks, sweetie," she said, kissing him briefly. "Here, go keep your brother company. And tell me how many inconsistencies there are with the book while I'm gone!"

Julie watched Dean walk away, knowing he would have no idea what were inconsistencies and what weren't. Then she turned to the phone. "Uncle J?"

"Juliet," her uncle said fondly. She cleared her throat and he quickly amended, "Julie."

"What's up?" she asked, sitting down.

"Okay, so, first of all, don't hate me," he said. That made her nervous, but he plowed on. "So, as you may remember, this weekend is your Grandmother Helen's annual family get together-"

"No."

"Julie-"

"Uncle Jasper, you know how much I hate those things!" Julie cried. "I'm twenty-seven years old! I don't need to spend an entire weekend getting told what a disappointment I am and how I should marry some rich old guy like she did so she won't be ashamed to mention my name."

"I know, Julie, they're awful," Jasper sighed. "God, you know how much she hates Taylor and I. But the thing is…well, over the past month, two maids have gone missing, and a chef was found dead in the house."

"Wait, what?" Julie asked. If she didn't know better, that sounded like…

"We think there may be a case going on there, and this seems as good a time as any to investigate."

Julie thought for a moment. "Okay. So, say maybe I'm interested in the case. I am not going alone to that thing, though."

"Of course not!" Jasper said quickly. "Tay and I will be there, and you should definitely bring Dean."

"Sam too," she added quickly.

"Ah, yes," he said. "The infamous Sam Winchester."

"That's right, you haven't met him!" Julie realized. "Well, I'll convince the two of them, and we'll be there. When is it?"

"We're meeting there tomorrow night at six for a formal dinner," Jasper groaned.

"Thanks for giving me lots of time to prepare!" Julie snapped.

"Hey, I was hoping she might cancel!" There was a beat, and then uncle and niece laughed. "So, I'll see you tomorrow. You better give those boys fair warning. And you also might want to pretend Sam is like a billionaire lawyer or something, and you're actually dating him and Dean is just your personal servant…"

"Goodbye, Jasper," Julie said firmly, hanging up on him. She took a deep breath to steel herself and then walked back into the room, forcing a smile. "Hey, guys."

"What was up?" Dean asked.

She took another deep breath. "You guys like me, right?"

"Of course!" Sam said, confused. "Why?"

"Well, just remember how much you like me…" Julie sighed.

* * *

><p>"I still can't believe you talked me into this," Dean muttered, fiddling with his tie as they got out of the car.<p>

"Oh, no you don't!" Julie cried, smacking his hand away and tightening his tie. "She cannot stand a man with a loose tie."

"Or a man who drinks beer out of a bottle, or a man who discusses sports at the dinner table, or a man who shows public displays of affection, or a man who doesn't speak at least three languages, or a man that doesn't read classic literature, or a man who doesn't have at least a few hundred thousand dollars in the bank, or a man who wears cheap suits, or-" Dean rattled off sarcastically.

"Okay, I get it, it's a lot to ask," Julie sighed. "But this is my family, and I do want them to like you, even if I hate them."

Sam pulled their suitcases out of the trunk. "Is this everything?" he called.

"Let's see, there's our three bags, plus her gift which has to be separately bagged, and then the hunting bag which we're going to have to hide because it's burlap…" Julie stopped when she realized both brothers were chuckling and shaking their heads at her. "What?"

"I've seen you take on demons and angels and vampires and ghosts and every monster imaginable," Dean said. "And yet I've never seen you as terrified of anything as you are this woman."

"Shut up," Julie muttered, shoving his chest lightly. He grabbed her and pulled her into a long hug. She sighed and relaxed a little. "I hate this," she admitted.

"Come on, it'll be fun," Dean smirked, letting her go. He smiled at her and added, "Have I told you that you look beautiful yet?"

"Four times," Julie muttered, blushing a little.

"Well, you do." And she did. He blond hair was twisted back into an elegant bun, a couple blond curls framing her face. She wore some light makeup, two inch black heels, and a sleeveless black dress with a deep neck that showed off her ample cleavage. Sam and Dean both wore suits, against their will, but Julie had made it very clear they could not get into the house if they were not dressed in black tie formal.

"Julie!" someone cried, and the three of them turned to see a man wearing a suit, with greying hair and Julie's blue eyes approaching. A busty blond young woman walked behind him, somehow keeping up in three inch heels, wearing a strapless purple dress with a short hemline. She looked bored and moody until she spotted Sam and Dean, and just like that, her expression turned flirty and suggestive.

"Jasper! Taylor!" Julie cried, rushing to meet her family. She hugged them both as the Winchester's joined them. "I've missed you guys."

"We missed you too, sweetheart," Jasper smiled. He grinned at Dean. "Dean Winchester…"

"Hey, Jasper," Dean smiled, giving the man a brief, one-armed hug. "Good to see you."

"Hey, Dean…" Taylor practically purred.

Dean smirked and nodded politely at her. "Taylor."

"And this must be your brother, Sam," Jasper said, turning to face the other Winchester. He stuck out his hand. "It's nice to finally meet you."

"You too," Sam said, shaking his hand. "I've heard a lot about you. I have to say, I'm very fond of your niece."

"Aren't we all?" Jasper grinned. "You two are the lucky ones. We get the occasional call saying she's not dead, but besides that…"

"Oh, shut up," Julie said, pushing his shoulder. "We've been busy!"

"So…you're the famous Sam Winchester, huh?" Taylor asked flirtatiously. Sam smiled a little uncomfortably. "What is it with your family and handsome men? Your girlfriend is pretty lucky."

"I don't have a girlfriend," Sam said carefully.

"Really? Lucky me," Taylor said, and she winked at him.

"I am so sorry," Julie muttered to Sam, and he smirked. "What do you say we get this over with?" she asked the group, and the five of them approached the huge mansion in front of them.

A doorman took their bags and waved them into the huge dining room where several well-dressed people stood talking, holding cocktails. "Where is the alcohol?" Jasper asked right away. "I need the alcohol."

Sam, Dean, Julie, and Jasper headed straight for the bar, while Taylor peeled off to go hit on a couple of Julie's second cousins. The nice thing about this for Taylor was that she was not related to a single person in here by blood, and therefore, they were all available to her.

Julie didn't even make it to the bar before one of the bachelors found her. There were several people here like Taylor and Jasper, who were only related by marriage, and far too many were men for Julie's taste. Chris Book was one of these men, and for the past six years, he had been trying to sleep with Julie. He caught her before she even made the bar and said, "There she is. The ever lovely Julie Carters."

"Bye, Chris," she said coolly.

"Oh, don't be like that," he said. "Let me buy you a drink."

"They're free."

"I'll pay you to have a drink with me, then," he smirked. "Come on, Julie. What do you say?"

"Is this guy bothering you?" a low, gruff voice asked, and they both turned to see Dean standing there, arms crossed.

"Who's this guy?" Chris asked coolly. "I don't remember seeing you before."

"Chris, this is my boyfriend, Dean," Julie smirked, putting an arm around Dean's waist. Dean smirked and did the same.

"Wait. Seriously?" Chris groaned. "Is it serious?"

"Very."

"Dammit. I bet Gabe five thousand that I could get you in bed by the end of the weekend," Chris grumbled.

"And that was a stupid-ass bet you would not have won even if I was single," Julie snapped. "Now, bye, Chris."

He walked away and Dean raised his eyebrows. "Is that normal?"

"Dean, that was just the beginning," Julie sighed. "I'm going to need that open bar if I'm going to get through this weekend."

Julie hadn't even gotten a whole glass in her before a woman cleared her throat behind her. _I'm not drunk enough for this,_ she thought, but then she turned around anyway and forced a smile. She took in the woman before her, looking surprisingly good for a woman nearing eighty, dressed in a deep purple dress, her silver hair swept up in an elegant bun. "Grandma!"

"I insist you call me Grandmother," Helen Mayor said in her unbelievably pretentious way. "It sounds much more sophisticated, and if you cannot do that, then call me Helen or Mrs. Mayor; you know the rules." She was the mother of Julie's mother, Katrina, but Helen was as different from Julie as could be. Helen Mayor, then Helen Aldrich had married an extremely wealthy man when she was twenty and he was forty-six. She was his beautiful young trophy wife, and proud to be so. She gave birth to two strong, handsome, wealthy sons who had gone on to be great business men and had several children each, creating for her a nice, big, wealthy family. And then there had been her only daughter.

Katrina was a small, sweet, shy, beautiful girl who had fallen in love with a boy in high school and eloped with him. She and Thomas Carters barely scraped by, raising their little daughter in a small home, both working to keep themselves afloat. Helen had frozen their assets when Katrina refused to go with the plans her mother had made for her, and Katrina was the disgrace of the family.

Still, she had been Helen's favorite. No one said it, but everyone knew it. And when Katrina was murdered in her home by a vengeful vampire, leaving behind a widowed, vengeful, young hunter and a two-year-old daughter, it broke Helen's heart. She never forgave Thomas, blaming him, and it wasn't until after Thomas had died and Julie was eighteen that she finally began trying to reach out to her estranged granddaughter.

Julie knew, deep in her heart, that Helen loved her. Helen saw in her at least the tiniest spark of Katrina, and she hoped that Julie could be everything Katrina wasn't. But that wasn't who Julie was. Julie couldn't be the perfect little doll, marrying an old, rich politician and being his beautiful trophy wife until he died, leaving her rolling in piles of money. That was not her. Helen and Julie both knew it, but Helen was determined to change that.

"Sorry, Grandmother," Julie sighed. She took another swig of her drink.

"What is that you're drinking?" Helen asked, sounding offended. "It doesn't look like the sort of thing a lady should drink."

"I don't even know," Julie shrugged. "Sam made it for me."

"Pardon? Who is this _Sam_?" Helen sniffed.

Sam, who had been pouring himself a drink a couple feet away looked up. He joined Julie and nodded at Helen. "You must be Julie's grandmother," he said in that impossibly charming way of his. He held out a hand to shake hers. "It's a pleasure to meet you. This is quite the gathering."

She delicately shook his hand, taking in the tall, well-built, handsome man in front of her. She nodded, satisfied with his appearance at least. "This is Sam Winchester, Grandmother," Julie said, encouraged by that nod. She searched quickly for something about the hunter next to her that would actually please her grandmother. "He got a full ride to Stanford right out of college and was top of his class."

"Impressive," Helen said, actually giving a small smile. "And how long have you two been dating?"

Both Sam and Julie blanched. "Uh…" Julie stammered, then laughed nervously. "Grandma...Grandmother, I mean…we're not dating."

"Yeah, we're not…" Sam said, laughing nervously as well.

"No?" Helen asked with a smirk. "You bring a handsome, intelligent young man here with you, and yet you're not dating? Jasper did inform me you were bringing your boyfriend with you in that charmingly vague way of his."

"Well, I did bring my boyfriend here," Julie said, still reeling slightly.

"And yet it is not this Sam. Although he is standing here next to you, and he poured your drink, and you just praised him to me, and you two make a very handsome couple," Helen smirked. "Do you see my confusion, Juliet?"

"It's Julie, and that's actually my boyfriend over there with Jasper," Julie explained, pointing to Dean a few feet away, chatting with Jasper. He noticed her pointing and came over.

"It is rude to point," Helen said coolly as Dean joined them.

"What's up?" Dean asked Julie, completely ignoring Helen. She frowned.

"Um, Dean, I just wanted you to meet my grandmother, Helen Mayor," Julie said quickly, gently turning him towards her.

"Ah, right," Dean said, sticking out his hand. "Nice to meet you, ma'am. This is quite the house you've got here."

Helen did not shake his hand, just raised her eyebrows. "It is, isn't it?" she said drily.

Dean dropped his hand and shifted awkwardly. "Thank you for inviting us," he tried again, smiling weakly.

"I don't actually recall inviting anyone but Juliet. However, she's such a strong independent woman she chooses what to do and who to bring herself, doesn't she?"

Julie bit her lip to keep from snapping at her grandmother. She had been rather nice, for her at least, to Sam, but she was already acting like she hated Dean. And that wasn't fair.

"Well, Grandmother, I thought you would want to meet my boyfriend," Julie said, going for a smile. "This is Dean Winchester. He and I have been living together for a year now, and I thought you would want to meet him since things are pretty serious."

Dean gave her a small smile. "Winchester?" Helen asked suspiciously. "Isn't that also Sam's last name?"

"We're brothers," Dean explained. Helen shot him a cold look that said very clearly she was not asking him. He gulped and took a small step back.

"I see," she said slowly. "And why exactly did you feel the need to bring your boyfriend's brother along then, if you two aren't also dating?"

"Well, Grandmother, Sam and Dean are very close," Julie said carefully. "They're…business partners. I actually…work with them, and we live together, so it just made sense to bring Sam-"

"You mean to tell me you live with two men?" Helen asked, sounding scandalized.

"Yes, Grandmother, I do," Julie snapped. "Sam is a very close friend of mine, and Dean is my boyfriend, and they both agreed to come with me, so I ask that you treat them both with the utmost respect and courtesy."

Helen studied her. "I shall try, Juliet," she sniffed after a moment.

"Julie."

"So, what is it you do then, Dean Winchester?" Helen asked coolly.

"I…well, Sam and I actually…we work for the government," Dean explained. "Julie actually does, too."

"My granddaughter works for the government, and no one thought to tell me?" Helen asked.

"It's a small job, Grandmother, not important-"

"Does it pay well? Are any of you very wealthy?"

"Well…" Dean glanced to Sam and Julie for help. "Not exactly."

"Of course," Helen said almost under her breath. "Alright then. Well, Dean… how old are you?"

Dean blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Do you have hearing problems? I asked how old you are. Is that hard to understand?" she snapped.

"No, no I just…I'm thirty-six," he finally got out.

"And you, Sam?"

"Thirty-two."

"Hmm." Helen sniffed. "Don't you think he's a little _old _for you, Juliet?"

Julie glared at her. "Your husband was over twenty years older than you, Grandmother," she shot back.

Helen smirked slightly. Then she sighed dramatically, "I suppose that is all. I should go speak to some of my other guests."

She walked away without another word, and Julie swore quietly. "I cannot believe her!"

"You weren't exaggerating," Dean muttered. "She really hated me."

"She didn't…" Julie tried weakly, but no one believed her.

"Hey, I think she liked _me_, at least while she thought I was your boyfriend," Sam said, trying to lighten the mood.

"What?" Dean snapped.

Sam and Julie both sighed. "It's going to be a very long weekend," Julie muttered, before pouring herself another drink.

* * *

><p>If Dean had not already been to hell, this would probably be pretty close to how he would have imagined it.<p>

He was surrounded by the kind of judgmental, pretentious snobs he despised, and every single one of them hated him. Some hated him because he wasn't one of them and all the women hated him because when they hit on him, he turned them down. The men hated him because he was with Julie, who was the most desirable bachelorette here, apparently. And then Helen Mayor hated him because he wasn't an old, rich guy who was about to die and leave Julie filthy rich. She hated him because he wasn't intelligent and mannerly and wealthy and perfect. She hated him because he wasn't good enough for her orphaned granddaughter.

After that first long, painful first evening, where neither Sam, Dean, Julie, Jasper, nor Taylor could get any information on the case (although Tay wasn't trying very hard), he and Julie collapsed into bed. Dean got out of the suit he had to wear and just tried to sleep. Julie joined him, and she touched his bare shoulder gently. He opened his eyes and stared at her. She was so beautiful, and young, and intelligent, and good. She deserved to live in a place like this, deserved a guy who could give her everything she wanted. Not a guy like him, who would probably eventually get her killed.

"I'm so sorry," Julie whispered, and he pulled her as close as he could to her and tried to forget the way these people made him feel. It was ridiculous, because normally pretentious assholes like this would make him laugh. But this was Julie's family, and he knew that she wanted them to love him. And they didn't. He wasn't good enough for them, for her, and everybody here knew it, and he saw it in the way they looked at him, and it really got to him. He hated to admit it, but it bothered him. A lot.

Julie stroked his hair, touched his cheek. "Dean, I hate this," she said. "These… these assholes…" She laughed bitterly. "My _family_…they shouldn't treat you like this. You're too good for this."

He snorted bitterly. "You are," she insisted. "Sam too." But they weren't as rough on him, because he wasn't a surly, borderline alcoholic high school dropout. Sam was the kid who had gotten a full ride to Stanford and been top of the class. He was charming and intelligent, and he easily could have been one of these people, with beautiful Jessica on his arm, living a life like this if Dean hadn't dragged him back in.

Dean sighed and kissed the top of her head. "I like you better than the rest of your family," he muttered.

She laughed lightly. "I love you," she whispered.

"Get some sleep, Jules," he sighed. She rested her head against his shoulder and he lay still until her breaths were regular on his skin. Then, finally, he was able to fall asleep too.

* * *

><p>The next day, they were able to dress in their normal clothes. The five hunters met up for breakfast, a serve-yourself kind of thing at a huge buffet in the dining room. Full of delicious food, Dean felt a little better. He and Julie split off from the group to talk to some of the older couples about the accidents that had happened recently, while Sam talked with a group of guys who were grilling out for lunch, Taylor tried to get information out of all the single men, and Jasper talked with the more serious adults.<p>

The hunters rendezvoused for lunch, but not a single one of them had found any leads. Lunch was another tough ordeal, when Helen reappeared and sat down next to Julie, surprising all five of them. She then proceeded to spend the entire meal asking Julie questions about her life and the two brothers she now lived with, hinting heavily that Julie should be dating Sam, not Dean. At one point, Helen was so blatantly obvious and rude that Dean excused himself and walked away.

"That's it," Julie snapped, and since the meal was wrapping up anyway, she stood up and said coldly, "Grandmother, if you would come with me."

Helen glared at her. "You cannot be serious?"

"Deadly."

Helen sighed dramatically, excused herself, and the two women stalked angrily upstairs to Helen's grandiose bedroom before Julie whirled around. "You are being horrible," she snapped, not bothering to beat around the bush.

"Juliet, that is terribly rude to say-" Helen started.

"No, you're the one who is being terribly rude!" Julie cried. "I didn't have to come here. I didn't even want to come! And I brought Sam and Dean with me because they're a very important part of my life, and if you don't approve of that, then I'm sorry but-"

"I didn't say I don't approve of Sam," Helen sniffed. "He seems like a fine man, and a very good match for you."

"Stop!" Julie snapped. "Just. Stop."

"Juliet, I don't understand-"

"It's Julie, _Grandma_!" Julie said, finally letting everything out. "And you're right. Sam's a great guy, and he's a very close friend of mine. But I've known him three months, and I've been with Dean coming up on a year!"

"Just because you meet this Dean first doesn't mean he's the right one for you," Helen said, and her voice wasn't cold or superior, but honest. She was really trying to convince Julie.

"Listen to me," Julie said. "I admitted to myself that I was in love with Dean a week after I met him. And you're going to think that's crazy, but it's not. And he's a high school dropout, and he isn't wealthy, and he has a hell of a lot of baggage. Being with him isn't always easy. We fight sometimes. He's in danger a lot of the time, and I could lose him while he's…working. And those are all reasons I'm sure you think I shouldn't be with him."

"He's not good enough for you," Helen said coldly. "You may not be my only granddaughter but…you're the only one who matters, really. You were Katrina's…you were her only daughter, and she made a foolish mistake when she was young, and look where it got her."

Julie was surprised by the pain in her grandmother's eyes, but she wasn't done. "My mother didn't make a mistake," Julie said softly. "She married a man she loved, and she was happy with him. Life wasn't easy, and her life…it ended bloody. But I'm sure if she was still here, she wouldn't change her decision. And neither will I."

"Why?" Helen asked softly. "Why does it have to be him? This _Dean Winchester_? Why can't it be someone who can take care of you and treat you well, why can't it be the kind of man you deserve? Why can't you just…why can't you just make the smart decision?"

It struck Julie how right her grandmother was, even though she didn't even know how dangerous and crazy being with Dean Winchester really was. Why couldn't she pick a nice, normal, good guy who would take care of her and love her? Someone who she could be safe with, someone she could marry and raise a family with and grow old with. Why did she have to pick this crazy life, when she could have a nice, normal, simple one like that? A good life.

"Because I love him," Julie whispered, surprised by the overwhelming wave of emotion that hit her as she admitted it.

Helen shook her head and turned away. She strode over to her dresser and studied the picture on it, of her, a good forty years younger, with her husband, Heath. She shook her head, and Julie realized with a start that her grandmother looked on the verge of tears.

"I didn't love him," Helen Mayor choked out after a moment. "Not like I should have. Not like you love this…this Dean."

"Grandma…" Julie tried gently, concerned.

Helen stiffened suddenly, and then a moment later she turned around, and her expression was hard again. "I am getting old, Juliet," she said flatly. "My time is running out, and before long, I'm sure I will join the husband that I didn't love."

"Grandmother-" Julie started.

"I wrote my will a month ago," her grandmother continued. "I could have given all of my property to one of my sons, and they would continue my husband's legacy, run this house and this business right. But instead…" She chuckled bitterly.

"Instead, I'm giving it all to you," she continued. Julie blinked, stunned. "I'm giving this house and a good chunk of the family fortune to you, the foolish daughter of my foolish daughter. And maybe, if you were with that Stanford-graduate Sam or some other man who knew what he was doing, my fortune would be safe, but no, you have to be with a high school dropout who will probably just leave you when someone better comes along. It's okay though, because you _love him_."

"Grandmother!" Julie snapped, hurt and appalled.

"You're young and naïve, Juliet," Helen sighed. "You've never known heartbreak. You haven't learned yet that there are more important things in life than being with someone who can make you happy, for a time. You have to make smart decisions, decide what you want out of life, and then go and get it yourself. Me? I wanted to be rich and live in a fancy house and have everything I desired. I wanted a large, successful family of people like myself, and I have all of those things. And you, Juliet? What do you want?"

"I want you to quit calling me that," her granddaughter snapped. "I want to be with the people I care about, people who care about me. I want to help people. And I'm doing those things, with the people I love, and while you may have a family here, I can almost guarantee you that there is not a single person here who actually genuinely loves you, Grandmother."

"I am appalled at you!" Helen said disapprovingly.

Julie laughed. "I can say the same. Look, just…don't talk to me. Don't talk to Dean, or Sam, or Taylor or Jasper either, because I know you hate them. Because they're my family, and I love them, unlike everyone else in this hell of a family. Just let us get through this weekend so we can go home and never have to see each other again. And give your inheritance to someone who actually wants it."

Julie walked out without another word, and Helen stared after her, mouth hanging open. Eventually, she composed herself, but the words stung. And the worst part wasn't even that they had come from the granddaughter she wanted most to love her. The worst part was that…she was right.

Helen looked up as a young, fresh-faced maid walked into the room with a tea tray. "Tea, ma'am?" the maid asked sweetly.

"Did I ask for tea?" Helen snapped. "Get out of here, you foolish girl!"

The girl's eyes flashed, and she stepped away from the tray. "Wow. Bad call, _ma'am_."

Everyone else was still down at lunch, and Julie had already rejoined them, so no one could even hear Helen scream.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

"I hate this place," Julie muttered, as the five hunters sat on a marble bench, surrounded by beautiful smelling rose bushes, overlooking a glorious fountain and a neat, extravagant garden.

"Thirty-six hours, and we are out of here," Jasper muttered, looking down at his watch.

"But that also means we've only got thirty-six hours to figure out why those maids disappeared and that chef died," Sam pointed out.

"Maybe the maids changed their name and moved to a different country to escape Helen Mayor," Julie said sarcastically.

Dean chuckled. "And maybe the chef dropped dead of sheer terror of that woman."

Taylor sighed and stretched. "Whatever's going on here, can we just figure it out? I think your hot cousin, Jason, is totally into me, Julie."

"But…you're also my cousin," Julie pointed out.

"Not by blood, darling, and that's what counts," Taylor said, winking at them. "Well, it seems I'm not going to be of any further use here, so…" She hurried away before they could stop her.

"Let her go," Jasper sighed. "I hate to admit it, but I think we'll do better without her helping, actually."

The four of them sighed. "So. Let's think. We have no leads, and everyone here is either clueless or hiding something," Julie said after a moment.

"Gee, this thinking is fun," Dean muttered, and she kicked him.

"If you two could quite playing footsie, I think I've got an idea," Sam smirked as the couple shot him glares.

"We're all ears," Jasper said, eager for something to do. They had been avoiding all guests for nearly two hours, relocating to a new spot outdoors every time they heard voices, but even that was getting tiresome.

"So, we've talked to almost every guest about the disappearances and the death, but we haven't talked to the actual staff," Sam pointed out. "And they're the ones who knew the people anyway. Wouldn't they be more likely to know?"

"I see," Jasper smirked. "So Sam's the brains of the operation, Dean's the muscle, and Julie's the eye candy."

"Shut up," Julie muttered kicking him too for good measure.

"It's a good plan," Jasper pointed out. "I say go for it. I'll go hit on—I mean check on those maids…"

Julie rolled her eyes. "Let's split up. Dean and I do kitchen duty, and Sam can keep an eye on you while you check with the maids. Sounds good?"

"Sure, I guess," Jasper sighed. They all got to their feet and prepared to go back to work. "Sam, son, I don't suppose you have a thing for maids, do you?"

Julie shook her head as she watched them walk away, talking and laughing. "Ready to go?" she asked Dean.

"Hell yeah!" he said. "I may hate this place, but I do love the food."

"We're working, not eating, you know."

"Yeah, whatever."

They didn't end up getting a lot of work done, though. The help was cold, quiet, and being paid enormous amounts of money not to answer any questions not about food. After a while, Dean and Julie gave up, and Dean stole a couple muffins just to spite them.

They met up with Jasper again, but he had made no progress either. Sam had gone off to question the guests that they hadn't spoken to yet when the maids had no answers, and the three hunters were at a loss. They sighed and went back inside, but Julie was grabbed almost instantly by her grandmother.

"I don't want to talk to you," Julie snapped coldly.

"Julie, please, I need to speak with you," Helen insisted, and Julie was surprised by the earnest look in her eyes and the use of her right name. She gave in and left Dean and Jasper behind to go speak with Helen in an empty room.

"What do you want?" Julie snapped after Helen shut the door behind them.

"Julie, please," her grandmother said. "Can we just talk civilly?"

"Fine," she replied, crossing her arms. "What is it you wanted, Grandmother?"

"I wanted to talk about these men you travel with," Helen said carefully.

"You mean live with?" Julie snapped. "We're not homeless."

"Right. I'm sorry." Helen collected herself. "How well do you know them?"

Julie snorted. "Uh…pretty well."

"So what is it exactly you do then, for a living?"

Julie's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "I told you…we work for the government."

"But, see, sweetheart, that's a little vague," Helen said, trying to smile sweetly, her face looking unnatural when she did so.

_Sweetheart? _Julie took a half-step away from her. Something was off about her grandmother. "Grandmother, what's wrong with you?" she said suspiciously.

"Nothing, Julie," Helen said quickly.

"You keep calling me Julie."

"That's your name, isn't it?"

"Yeah, and you don't call me that."

Helen, or whatever else this was, because Julie was becoming more and more certain it wasn't her, frowned, trying to think of an answer. Julie reached into the pocket of her jacket for the small silver knife she carried around with her at all times, and realized it was gone.

Helen grinned suddenly. "Looking for this, sweetheart?" she smirked, holding up the silver knife in her gloved hand.

Julie turned around and tried to open the door, but it was locked. She whirled around and glared at the thing pretending to be her grandmother. "What are you?" she snarled.

"I don't really have a name," the monster said thoughtfully. "I was a really gorgeous prostitute for a couple months named Myra, and I really liked the name. I guess you could call me that, or Grandma, if you'd prefer that."

"You're a shifter?" Julie guessed.

"Busted," this Myra monster smirked, and it was so odd to look at this old, silver-haired, elegant, cruel old woman and realize she really was a monster. "So you really are a hunter, too, then."

"And you're the one killing people and making them disappear."

"A sharp one, too," Myra smirked. "My brother and I, he likes to go by Horace, we came here and pretended to be some maids for a while, but they were pathetic, so we got new bodies as chefs. Then one of the other chefs caught on, so something had to be done about him…"

"And I suppose the other maids are dead, then?" Julie said slowly.

"Unfortunately," the monster sighed. "They tried to resist us. Don't make their same mistake, Julie Carters."

Julie smirked. "Why are you here, anyway?"

"Your grandma's rich," the monster pretending to be her grandmother said with a sly grin. "And we want her inheritance once she's dead. So our plan was to take her out while the whole family was here, see who got the inheritance, and become them long enough to get loaded, and then split town. Pretty ingenious, huh?" Myra grinned.

"Only problem was, then you showed, and the inheritance goes to you, a hunter. Of course, we wouldn't have known you were a hunter, but then you brought the two most dangerous hunters alive along with you, so that was a bit of a tipoff."

"Yeah, and those two hunters you're so scared of?" Julie smirked confidently. "They're still here. And they'll notice when I don't come out of here, they'll find you and take care of you."

"Don't worry about them," Myra chuckled, and it was so eerie looking at her grandmother and knowing she could be about to kill her. "My brother is working on taking care of the Winchester's as we speak. And as for you…well, you will come out of here. Or rather, I will, and you'll be dead, but close enough."

"Don't bet on it," Julie replied cockily.

"Oh, really? Why not? I've got your silver knife, sweetie. You can't touch me."

Julie bent and pulled something out of her boot. Before Myra could move, Julie threw a small silver knife through the air, and it lodged in the center of her throat. Julie smirked as the shifter fell to the ground dead, and replied, "Because I've always got a second knife."

Julie hid the body in the closet after retrieving her knives, and she found a key in the shifter's pocket. She unlocked herself and rushed to find Dean.

"Hold this knife!" she ordered him as soon as she saw him.

He blinked. "What?"

"Just hold the damn knife, Dean!"

"Okay, I will! Calm down," Dean said, surprised, but he took the silver knife she was holding and didn't flinch or burn. She sighed and relaxed visibly. "What's wrong?"

"My grandmother just tried to kill me."

"Hold on. What?!"

"There was a shifter pretending to be her, and she was going to kill me, but thankfully she monologued first, so I know her plan," Julie said in a careful whisper. "She and her brother want the inheritance, and they know we're here and that we're hunters. They want to take us out, kill my grandmother, and then become whoever would normally inherit the inheritance. Anyway, I took care of one of them, but anyone here could be a shape shifter, and they're after you and Sam."

"Damn. Okay." Dean took a deep breath. "We've got to find Sam, and warn Jasper and Taylor for that matter. We should split up."

"Right," Julie breathed. "Here, take one of my knives."

Dean took the silver knife again and kissed her quickly. "Stay safe."

And the two hunters took off in opposite directions without another word.

* * *

><p>"This place has a pool," Sam said in disbelief.<p>

The man with him, Julie's cousin, Jason chuckled. "Yeah. Helen's loaded. I mean, she's a bit of a bitch, but she's got a hell of a house."

Sam smirked slightly. As far as Julie's relatives that Sam had met so far went, Jason seemed okay. He was about Sam's age, a couple years younger, and less snobby than the others. He had asked Sam to drink a beer and chat with him, and Sam was more than willing to chat with this guy, hopefully furthering the investigation.

"So," Jason said after a taking a long drink of his beer. "You're here with Julie, huh?"

"Yeah," Sam shrugged.

"Julie Carters…" Jason said thoughtfully. He smirked. "The black sheep of the family. And one hell of a woman, although I'm sure you know that." Sam blinked, a little surprised at how this was going. "These gatherings are for the people who are actually related by blood to catch up, and those who aren't to hook up, and for Helen to feel like she actually cares about her family and feel good about herself," Jason explained. "And Julie is number one on most guys' hit that list. She is probably the hottest unmarried woman here."

Sam almost choked on his beer. "But…isn't she your cousin?"

"Relax, Sam," Jason chuckled. "I'm not going to hook up with her. She's all yours, buddy."

Sam almost choked again. "I-"

"There's a lot of guys here who want to be you, pal," Jason said, shaking his head. "There's no good way to say this as her cousin, but that is one smoking girl you got there."

"I'm…we're not…she's not my girlfriend," Sam finally got out.

"So it's just sex, huh? She seemed more like the serious relationship type to me."

"No, I…" Sam took a deep breath to clear his head. "I'm not with Julie. My older brother, Dean…he's the one dating her."

"Oh. Well." Jason laughed. "Sorry, man. That must be awkward."

"Not really," Sam muttered. If one more person here mistook him for Julie's boyfriend, he was afraid he would hit them. And it wasn't because he didn't like Julie. She was great. She was funny, and sweet, and brave, and a kickass hunter, and she was so smart, and they had so much in common, and she was so pretty…it wasn't that he would mind being her boyfriend. That could never happen, though. She and Dean were together, and they were so happy, and he would never do anything to change that. That's how things were, so if everyone could just leave them alone…

"But you're…business partners with her, right? That's it?" Jason asked curiously.

"Uh…yeah, we work together. It's government work, actually."

"Hmm." Jason studied him, and there was something unnerving about how cold and calculating his eyes were.

"Something wrong?" Sam asked carefully.

"I've just never heard hunting referred to that way before," the man smirked.

And before Sam could react, Jason smashed his bottle against the top of Sam's head.

The shifter wanted to stop and gloat, but he heard a man yell, "Hey!" His deep, angry voice echoed around the pool. The shape shifter looked up and saw Dean Winchester running towards him.

The monster posing as Jason hesitated for a moment, and then heaved Sam's unconscious body into the deep pool before taking off running. "Sammy!" Dean yelled, torn for a moment. But in the end, he leapt into the pool to save Sam, letting the monster go. He barely stopped long enough to pull his jacket off and kick his boots off his feet before he dove in after his brother.

Sam was sinking quickly, leaving a little trail of red in the water from a cut on his forehead. Dean grabbed the back of Sam's jacket and swam hard, struggling to get them back to the surface. Once they were back above water, Dean had to work hard just to keep Sam's head above water. After a few moments, Sam started spluttering and his eyes opened.

Dean breathed a sigh of relief, and he managed to swim over to the edge of the pool. He heaved himself out and helped Sam onto dry ground. The two brothers lay side by side, gasping for air and sopping wet. "Sammy…you okay?" Dean asked after a few moments.

"I…think so," Sam sighed. "God, my head."

Dean sat up just as someone else entered the room. "Dean! Sam!" Julie shrieked, and she ran to them, Jasper and Taylor behind her.

Julie knelt beside Sam, helping him sit up. "What happened to your head?" she asked, concerned.

"That guy, Jason…he hit me over the head with a bottle and tried to drown me," Sam said slowly. Julie gasped. "If Dean hadn't been there…"

"Somebody get me a first aid kit," Julie ordered, and Jasper disappeared to find one.

"They both clean?" Dean guessed, eying Taylor suspiciously.

"I checked, and they're good," Julie said as she forced Sam to lie back down again and rest. "Taylor was actually hitting on Jason when I found her, so when someone said Sam was with Jason in the pool room…"

"What's going on?" Sam asked, confused. "What was that? A shifter?"

"There were two of them, but Jules took care of one already," Dean explained. "And, of course, they know who we are, and they want to kill us before we kill them. Dammit, Sammy, when did we get so famous?"

Julie smirked and ran a hand through Dean's wet hair, spiking it up. "I'm glad you two are okay," she said softly.

"Well, my head is bleeding and I just almost drowned," Sam pointed out.

"You're fine, you big baby," Julie retorted, although she did fret over him quite a bit as she patched up his head once Jasper returned.

Sam, Dean, and Julie returned to their adjoining rooms and the two men stripped out of their wet clothes and changed into fresh, dry ones. Then the five hunters reconvened, quickly checked each other with silver, and made a plan.

"We need to find out what happened to Helen, and we need to find that last shape shifter," Jasper said once they were all together. "Any ideas?"

"The last place I saw Grandmother was up in her room a couple hours ago," Julie replied. "Some time after that fight, one of the shifters must have done something to her."

"Alright," Dean said. "Here's the plan. We go search that room, look for Helen, hope we find that shifter. And no more splitting up," he ordered. "Gets too confusing and easy for it to take out one of us."

"Makes sense," the others agreed, and so the five hunters slipped past the party, which was celebrating another extravagant dinner, not even realizing or caring their hostess was missing. When Dean opened the door to Helen's bedroom and four hunters poured in, they saw about the last thing they were expecting though.

Helen was awake, sitting there tied to a fancy oak chair. Jason, or the shape shifter posing as him stood nearby, holding a small pistol to the woman's head. The four of them froze in the doorway, glaring at the monster, but unable to attack as long as he shut the door.

"Please, do come in and shut the door like gentlemen," he said reprovingly. "And lady," he added with a flirtatious wink at Julie.

Sam closed the door, and Julie growled, "Look, asshole, I'm having a really hard time not coming over there and killing you, so I'd suggest you surrender, and we might spare you."

"Now, why would I do that?" he smirked.

"Because you're outnumbered?" Dean replied coldly. "Just saying."

"I could have hidden in that huge crowd down there, or fled, but I didn't, even though you've already killed my sister," the shifter said coolly. "Obviously, I'm not going to surrender, if after all of that, I still wanted to face you." He added mockingly, "Just saying."

"Just kill the monster so we can be done with this," Dean muttered to Sam.

"I'll blow dear Granny's brains out if you even try it," the shifter smirked.

"You overestimate how much we actually want her alive," Julie said coldly, and Jasper and Taylor stared at her, surprised.

"You talk tough, Juliet," Jason smirked. "But would you really let me kill your grandmother in cold blood?"

Julie hesitated, and he smirked. "I thought so."

"Of course she wouldn't let you do so, you fool!" Helen cried. "She is my granddaughter! Now surrender to them, and these nice men will make sure you only get put in prison for a few decades."

"Now we're nice?" Dean muttered to Sam bitterly.

"You're not calling the shots anymore, Helen," the Jason imposter smirked. "In fact, you are so out of depth, I'd suggest you keep your mouth shut entirely, so as not to sound stupid."

Helen looked outraged, but Jasper added, "Yeah, Helen, you really should shut up." He turned to grin at Julie. "Always wanted to tell her that."

The shifter shook his head. "You think this is a joke? _I'm_ the one calling the shots now, and I say the four of you are going to put down all your weapons and get on your knees, now."

The four hunters obeyed reluctantly, kicking their silver weapons over to him and kneeling down. As the four hunters surrendered, there was a loud noise just outside, and Julie shrieked, "Taylor, go! Warn the others!"

The shape shifter growled angrily and took off towards the door. He swung it open, and Jasper tripped him. The shifter stumbled through the open door and straight into Taylor's waiting silver knife.

"Oops," she smirked, before throwing the dead monster to the ground.

"Nice, Tay," Julie said, high-fiving her cousin as the three men moved to quickly gather the corpse and hide it in the closet. The two cousins quickly cut Julie's grandmother free, but the old woman sprang away from the five of them the moment they were free.

"What the hell are you people?" she asked in a low, horrified voice.

Julie glanced at the others. "We're hunters," she sighed. "We work together and kill monsters like this one."

"Your _cousin_, Jason? You just killed your cousin and now you're calling him a _monster_?"

Julie looked to the others for help, but they were silent. "That wasn't my cousin. That was a shape shifter pretending to be him."

Helen blinked. "So, not only are you a murderer, but you're all insane, too!"

"He tried to kill you!" Dean cried.

"I don't want to hear anything from _you,_" Helen said coldly to him.

"And you won't get to, because now that we've saved your ass, and everyone else's here, we're getting out of this hellhole," Julie snapped. "And you can keep that inheritance, give it to some other person who actually wants it. Come on, guys," she said, and they all started to leave.

"I can't believe I ever saw anything in you," Helen said coldly, and Julie stiffened.

Dean turned around and looked her in the eye. He said coolly, "With all due respect, Helen…and that is none...the fact that you saw something in Julie…I think that may have been the only time you were actually right."

And without another word, the five of them left, and they never returned.

* * *

><p>The hunters said their goodbyes, promising to keep in touch and work together again soon, and then Taylor and Jasper went their own way. Sam, Dean, and Julie didn't say a word for much of the drive home. "God, I hate my family," Julie said suddenly after a long silence, and she sounded near tears. "Every last despicable one of them."<p>

Dean was driving, so he couldn't comfort her, but Sam, who was sitting in the back with her, put his arm around her. "Forget about them," he said gently. "We're your family now, if we're not too despicable for you."

Julie laughed a little and buried her head in Sam's shoulder. He hugged her for a long time, and Dean watched them in his rearview mirror, trying to ignore the angry beast in his chest. They were just friends. Sam was just being a good friend, comforting her after the terrible ordeal she had just endured.

Julie eventually fell asleep like that, with her head on Sam's shoulder instead of Dean's. Dean knew it shouldn't bother him, but it did, just the tiniest bit. And as for Sam…he knew it shouldn't make him happy. He knew he shouldn't love the feeling of Julie in his arms…but he did. Just a little bit.

"Hey, Sam?" Dean asked after a while.

"Yeah?"

"I just…I'm glad we're not like that. Being judgmental and cruel, secretly hating each other…I'm just glad I've got family. Whatever you call that, it's _not _family."

Sam smiled a little. "Yeah. Yeah, I'm glad too. Thanks, too. For saving me earlier, in the pool…"

"Hey, what is family for?" Dean said with a small smile. And Sam smiled back, before closing his eyes and drifting off himself.

* * *

><p>Julie looked up when someone knocked on the door of the library. Ever since they left the hellhole that was her grandmother's home yesterday, Julie had spent a lot of time in the library, curled up with warm tea and a soft sweater and a pile of thick, leather-bound books, her favorite way to de-stress. For a while, Sam had sat and read with her, but now she was alone.<p>

Dean stood in the doorway, looking amazingly good in blue jeans, combat boots, and a red plaid flannel shirt. He gave her a small smile, his green eyes twinkling. "Hey, Jules. You got a minute? I found something I want to show you."

Julie closed her book and got up. "What is it?" she asked.

"It's a surprise," he said, and his excitement was so contagious, she couldn't stop herself from smiling back.

He led her into a room of the bunker she had seldom visited, one of the storage rooms with a wide open floor. Dean walked over to something, an old record player, and started it up. Julie grinned when she heard the song, an old jazz song, "The Way You Look Tonight." She shook her head at Dean. "How did you know?"

"That you love this song?" Dean asked. He grinned. "Back at our house, you used to sing it all the time while you cooked. And when I found it, well…"

Julie shook her head, smiling. She loved him, so much. No matter how truly awful her family was to Dean, they didn't matter. What mattered was him, and how funny and charming and sweet and good he was, even if he didn't realize it.

"Dance with me?" he asked.

Julie laughed. "No way. You don't actually expect me to believe the great Dean Winchester can dance?"

"You tell me," he smirked, holding out his hand. She took his hand, and he pulled her in close. They began to waltz a bit awkwardly to the song. He really couldn't dance very well.

"You don't really know what you're doing, do you?" she smirked.

"Not even a little," he replied, and they both laughed. "I've only ever seen people dance in movies. How am I doing?"

"You keep stepping on me," she pointed out.

"True. At least I've got one part down." And as the song swelled, Dean suddenly dipped Julie, and she shrieked with laughter. He kissed her, the kind of sweet, tender kiss girls dreamed about. When they straightened up, Julie stared at him, and maybe it was because she was lightheaded from the dip and the kiss, but she was speechless.

"I love you, Jules," Dean said after a moment.

"Stop it," she said. He blinked, confused. "Stop being so goddamn perfect!"

"Trust me, I am _not_ perfect-" he started.

Julie kissed him just to shut him up. "Shut up," she told him when they pulled apart.

He chuckled, and they continued to dance, teasing each other and laughing and kissing, in a blissful little bubble of love. And neither of them noticed Sam watching them through the crack in the doorway almost…jealously.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten**

Sam took another handful of popcorn from the bucket and shook his head at Dean and Julie. The three had spent twenty minutes arguing over what movie they should watch, with Dean and Julie finally teaming up on Sam to watch one of their personal favorites, _Back to the Future._ They were only twenty minutes into the movie, and yet already Sam was ready to lock his brother and best friend in another room. They were quoting every other line in weird voices, to boot. And as much as he loved them, he was seriously considering knocking them both out just so he could enjoy this movie in peace.

"Come on, Sammy," Dean said happily. "You gotta admit, this movie is a classic."

"Yeah," Sam smirked. "Now if only I could actually watch the movie and hear what was going on."

"We're much more entertaining," Julie replied, draping her arm over Dean's shoulders. She was sitting on his lap, sharing their own bowl of popcorn, which translated into Dean eating all the food _and _drinking both of their beers.

Sam opened his mouth to reply, but before he could, they heard a door close from down the hallway. Dean and Julie, who had been about to kiss, froze, and Sam paused the movie.

Without a word, the three hunters stood. Julie started to slip towards a nearby table, where her angel blade lay. But before she could even reach it, a woman's voice called, "Sam Winchester? Dean Winchester? Are you here?"

The brothers exchanged a look. "Hannah?" Sam called.

"Yes," her voice came again. "Where are you?"

"If you're in the main hall, it's the fifth door down on the right!" Dean yelled. Then he turned to Sam and Julie. "What is she doing here?"

"I don't know," Sam shrugged.

"How did she even get in?"

"Oh, I fixed the place so Cas and Hannah can just come in," Sam replied.

"Wait, when was that?"

Before Sam could reply, Hannah walked into the room and flipped on the light switch. The dark-haired angel stopped for a moment and cocked her head, confused. "Sam, Dean, there is a woman in here."

The three hunters exchanged a look. "Um…yes, there is, Hannah," Sam said carefully. "What's the problem? Is there a…a reason you're here?"

"Yeah, where's Cas?" Dean asked.

Hannah's normal blank expression suddenly changed into one of pain and worry. "That's why I'm here, Sam and Dean and…" She glanced uncertainly at Julie.

"Julie Carters," she said quickly. "Dean's-"

"Dean's girlfriend, yes," Hannah. "Castiel mentioned you a few times."

"Where is he?" Dean asked again, his expression dark and concerned.

"He's in heaven," Hannah sighed. Her stiff, robotic shell was breaking down, and the pretty woman looked overwhelmed. "He…he's in trouble."

"What's wrong?" Sam asked, concerned.

"His grace has been weakening, but he won't let any of us help him anymore." Hannah took a deep breath. "He's dying, and he won't let me help him. He's so weak that he can't leave heaven anymore, and since everyone else is afraid to go up there, we can't help-"

"Hold on," Dean stopped her. "What do you mean, everyone is afraid to go into heaven?"

"It's…it's Metatron," Hannah sighed. "He's powerful, even now, in a cell. He's figured out how to manipulate small parts of heaven at a time and, well…it's tolerable, just a nuisance. But, well…"

"You're all terrified of him," Sam guessed. The angel sighed, but didn't try to deny it.

"So let me get this straight," Dean said coldly. "That asshole of an angel is chasing you angels out of heaven, where Cas is trapped, and he's dying? How long does he have?"

Hannah gave him a pathetic look. "A few hours?"

"You're kidding me." Dean looked at Sam and Julie in disbelief. "How could you wait this long?!" he cried angrily.

"Castiel ordered me not to tell you!" Hannah snapped. Her blue eyes flashed as she stared him down. "But I could not let him die and so…I need your help."

The three hunters exchanged a look. "Of course we'll help!" Julie said after a moment. "It sounds like we don't have a lot of time, though. So…what's your plan?"

Hannah shook her head. "I don't know. There's nothing I can do to help Castiel. He won't take one of his follower's graces. And besides, Metatron is careful to manipulate heaven so we cannot approach the prison anymore. I was hoping that…well, one of you could come up with a plan."

Sam and Julie exchanged a look, at a loss for words. But Dean stepped forward and said, "I've got a plan."

"Really?" all three of them asked.

"Yeah," Dean shrugged. "It's obvious. I'll kill myself."

* * *

><p>"I can't let him do this," Julie said desperately.<p>

"Julie-" Sam said gently.

"No! No, I can't, Sam. I can't let Dean die! Are you really saying you can let your brother kill himself, not even knowing if he'll be able to come back?!"

"Julie," Sam said in an even softer, gentler tone. "I know it's hard, but you've got to let him do this."

"Sam!" she cried.

"No, listen to me. You know Dean. He'll do this whether we want him to or not. And going off of his track record, I'm pretty sure we'll find a way to get him back. But, Julie, the thing is…he has to do this. For Cas. He cares about Cas, so much, and if there's anything he can do to save him…he'll do it."

"But…does he really have to die?" Julie asked, and she was ashamed to realize she was on the verge of tears.

"Hey…" he said soothingly, pulling her into a hug. "Listen to me. He'll be okay. He'll get into heaven, find Cas, get him some grace, kick some angel ass, and be back before we know it."

"How are you so sure?" Julie muttered into his shirt.

Sam sighed and shook his head. "Honestly? I'm not. But if I don't believe that… I'll never be able to let him do this."

After a long moment, Sam and Julie pulled apart. They composed themselves and walked back into the room, where Dean was sitting on a couch, Hannah hovering nearby, with a small bottle of a rare and deadly poison they'd found in the bunker. "You guys ready?" Dean asked gently.

"No," Julie snapped before sitting down next to Dean on the couch and kissing him for a long, sweet moment.

"I love you," Dean told her when they pulled apart.

Julie buried her face in his shoulder and murmured, "Then don't do this."

Dean sighed and stroked her hair. "I've got to, Jules. He needs me."

Julie got up and took a few steps back. Sam shook his head. "You're coming right back, you hear me, Dean?" he said firmly. "Because otherwise I'll do anything to get you back."

"I'll be back before you even realize I'm gone," Dean said confidently. He studied Sam for a moment and then suddenly smiled. "Sammy…I just want to say how glad I am you were able to forgive me and-"

"Stop it," Sam snapped. "Don't you dare say goodbye. You're coming right back, with a fully functional Cas as well."

Dean nodded and smiled slightly. "Damn right. Alright, Hannah. Where's that poison?"

"Dean…I can't ask this of you," the angel said as she handed him the bottle.

"So, you're not asking. I'm volunteering." Dean took one last look at the two people he loved most and gave them a small smile. "Bottoms up!"

Julie knelt beside him and took his hand as he swallowed the dark liquid. For a few seconds, he felt fine. Then his throat began to burn. He coughed, and then suddenly he was choking. Dean grew lightheaded, and the room began to spin. His stomach was churning and his throat was like fire.

Julie barely bit back a scream as Dean began to choke, foaming at the mouth. She squeezed his hand as his whole body trembled with spasms. "No," she breathed. "No."

All at once, Dean gave one last twitch and slumped to the side. Dead. "No," she repeated in a dull, flat voice. Sam's arm went around her and he drew her into another hug as Hannah gently pushed Dean's eyes closed. Julie closed her eyes, trying not to sob as she clung desperately to his hand.

* * *

><p>"Another job done," Sam sighed, holding a beer out to Dean.<p>

Dean took the beer from his brother and popped the cap off. Sam took a swig of his own beer and sat down on the hood of the Impala next to his brother. The two of them took a sip of beer and sighed in unison

Sam didn't need to say anything, and neither did Dean. The two brothers could just sit next to each other, drinking beers in silence, and they would understand all the things the other wasn't saying. That's the way things were between them. They loved and understood each other, they took care of each other, they were each other's missing half. And as long as Dean was here, content to be with Sam…it was like heaven.

Or, rather, it was heaven.

"Dean? Is that really you?" Dean looked up, snapped out of his peaceful bliss by the sound of Cas's voice. His voice was thinner than usual, and when he saw Castiel, he understood why. The angel was dressed in his usual suit and trench coat, but he was much paler than normal, and he had dark circles under his eye.

"Cas." Dean stood up and set down his beer on the car. Sam didn't notice because, as much as he hated to admit it, Sam wasn't real. None of this was, it was all just…memories.

"What are you doing here?" Dean asked. "In _my_ heaven?"

Cas winced, slightly embarrassed. "Well…I can't exactly leave heaven right now because I'm…well, I'm-"

"Dying," Dean finished. "Yeah, I know. Me too, actually. Not exactly though, because I'm already dead, so…"

"What happened to you, Dean?" the angel asked, looking heartbroken. "Who killed you?"

"Me."

"What?"

"Well, Hannah came to Sam and Julie and I and told us that you were in trouble so…" Dean shrugged. "I'm helping you."

"I could not ask that of you," Cas sighed.

"You didn't ask that of me; I volunteered," Dean replied firmly. "Now, come on, Cas. Let's go find that bastard Metatron and get you some grace back."

Castiel smiled sadly at Dean. "Dean Winchester, you are a better friend than I deserve."

"Shut up, Cas. We don't have time for you to get all sappy and emotional. Just tell me how we get to heaven's prison. Is there like a yellow brick road or what?"

Cas shook his head. "You've been to heaven before, right?"

"Several times, apparently, although I only remember one time," he answered.

"Well, humans travel differently through heaven than angels, but I believe if you just know where you want to end up and keep plowing through, we should eventually arrive at the prison."

And so, angel and human, or whatever Dean was now that he was dead, set out. They passed through memories of Dean's childhood home, walked past a young Dean teaching an even younger Sam how to shoot a gun. They stopped for a few moments to watch Bobby Singer teasing an adult Sam back in his old home, but Dean moved on within a few minutes, when the memories of Bobby became too painful.

Dean was very tempted to stay when they entered the bunker to see Sam and Julie playing poker, and they invited Dean and Cas to join them. However, they had to keep going. Dean again grew weak when he stepped into the roadhouse and Ellen and Jo Harvelle offered him and Sam drinks at the bar. And when he entered the Carters' household and Jasper asked him to stay for dinner, he wanted more than anything to stay with them at least for a few minutes. But Cas was growing slowly weaker, and Dean could see it, so he forced himself to keep moving, pushing aside all the happy memories he would love to relive.

Dean stopped when the scene changed into a small, cute, suburban house, complete with a neat green lawn and white picket fence. Dean had never seen it in his life, and everything here was supposed to be a memory of his. He frowned and looked around curiously.

"Where is this, Dean?" Cas asked, noticing his hesitation.

"I…don't know," he admitted.

The two exchanged looks and then headed towards the front door. Dean knew he should keep moving, but the curiosity was killing him.

He knocked on the door and heard someone yelling, a woman's voice from the sound of it. A moment later, footsteps thudded down a flight of stairs and the door opened. A tall, skinny, brown-haired, eerily familiar-looking teenager of about fourteen or fifteen grinned at Dean. "Oh, hey, Dean! There you are. Mom was just about to call."

"Is that Dean?" a woman's very familiar voice called, and Dean froze. This couldn't be happening. "Tell him to come in here before I kick his ass for being late!" she yelled.

The kid shrugged. "You heard her." He stepped out of the doorway, expecting Dean to come in, but Dean was completely frozen in shock.

"What's going on? What memory if this?" Cas asked Dean quietly.

"It's…not a memory," Dean replied carefully.

"Then it must be Metatron," Cas sighed. "But I don't understand. This doesn't seem like some violent, torturous vision. Why would he…oh."

Cas stopped when a tan-skinned, dark-haired, pretty woman who looked to be in her mid-thirties stepped into the doorway and put an arm around the teenage boy. Of all the things he had expected…this was not it. _She _was not it.

"Hey, Dean," Lisa Braeden said with a smile. "Are you coming in?" She laughed, and something in Dean broke. "I was just kidding about kicking your ass. In fact…" She stepped away from the teenage boy, her son, Ben, and grabbed the collar of Dean's shirt. She stretched up on her toes and kissed him briefly before he could recover from seeing her.

"Gross, Mom," Ben moaned. "Get a room!"

Lisa turned to smile at her son and then turned back to Dean. She noticed his shocked, conflicted expression and asked, "Sweetheart…what's wrong?"

"I have to get out of here," Dean said softly, turning away from her.

"What? Wait!" Lisa cried, running after Dean and grabbing his arm. Ben followed, and Cas stood nearby, just watching. "Dean, what are you talking about? Are you okay?"

"I can't…this isn't right," Dean got out, his heart breaking all over again for these two people he had lost. These two people represented a whole life that he had given up for Sam, two more people he had loved who had gotten and hurt and almost died because of him. It still hurt to think about how he had to have Cas wipe their minds so they would never get hurt because of him again.

"What are you talking about? Of course it's right!" Ben snapped. "Dean, what's wrong with you?!"

He was scared. The kid was scared, scared to lose Dean, and Dean felt his love for his almost-son swell up in him again. He had almost moved on, almost forgotten the pain, and here it was again being thrown in his face. "I don't belong with you two," Dean said, more to himself.

"What?" Lisa asked, sounding hurt. "But…_Dean…"_

"This life, it…had to end. It wasn't mine." Dean took a deep, steadying breath. "Lisa…Ben…I don't belong here with you guys, living happily ever after. I belong on the road with my brother and my girlfriend, saving people, hunting things…Believe me when I say I didn't want to leave you two, but…I never belonged here."

He felt stronger now. He knew he was right, and he would just walk away without a backwards glance, Dean Winchester the hardened hunter once more. But Lisa, eyes shiny with tears, said softly, "Dean, of course you belong here. You were happy here. You loved us, and we loved you. _I _love you."

Where was that resolve again, that strength to leave? Why did he even want to leave?!

Lisa leaned in to kiss him, and all of the sudden, Dean saw Julie. The last thing he had seen before his vision gave out, her face above him, concerned and caring. Julie. Jules.

He stepped away from Lisa, who blinked, hurt. He turned and walked quickly away. "Dean, wait!" she cried after him. "Don't you love me?!"

He kept walking.

Ben joined her. "What did we do? Were we not good enough for you? Was _I _not good enough?! Dean, I _loved_ you! You were the closest thing I ever had to a father and now you're leaving me? _Again?_ Dean. _Dean!"_

Dean kept walking until Ben's voice and that house that could have been his home faded away. To think that those people could be his family, that house could be his home, if only he hadn't chosen this life. And just as he had finally been moving on…

"Dean," Cas said gently, and Dean became aware of the angel following him. Cas sounded comforting, and he started to console Dean further, but Dean could not take any more pity. He could not take thinking about those people and that life for another second.

"Don't," he snapped. "Don't try to…comfort me or whatever. In fact, don't ever mention this again."

Castiel blinked in surprise, but he respected his friend's wishes. The two men walked in silence until the scene changed, and they were suddenly in a white chapel. The place was practically empty, except for a man in a suit standing by the altar. He grinned at Dean. "Hey, Dean," the tall, long-haired man in a tux said. "Nervous?"

Dean stared at his brother, confused. "What is this?" Dean asked Cas quietly.

"You don't remember this either? It looks like a wedding."

"The only wedding we've gone to in…well, ever was _Sam's,_ and this isn't it," Dean explained.

"Sam got _married?!_"

"Long story," Dean muttered, looking around. The place was small, yet elegant, a nice, quiet little chapel. The kind of place people went for discreet, quiet little weddings and ceremonies. It felt weird to admit, being a tough guy and all, but this was the kind of place he could see himself getting married, if that was ever a possibility.

"Whose wedding is this?" Dean muttered almost to himself.

Cas was smiling and looking past Dean at something, or someone. "Well, judging by the best man and the bride coming down the aisle, I'd say _yours_," Castiel said softly.

Dean turned around and his heart jumped into his throat. Because there she was, halfway down the aisle, blushing like she felt stupid, but real joy in her sparkling blue eyes: Julie. She was wearing a beautiful, strapless white dress, her blond curls up in an elaborate hairdo underneath her veil. And she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

"Now this is more like heaven," Dean said softly, smirking slightly. Because he was really, truly happy in this moment. He had never wanted to admit it, because it wasn't possible, but he wanted to get married. He wanted to have a nice little house with a wife who he loved. He wanted them to raise their kids together; he wanted a beautiful little girl and he wanted a little boy who he could raise right. But he was Dean Winchester, and those things weren't possible.

But he had to admit, in the joy that he felt watching his beautiful bride coming down the aisle towards him, that he wanted it. Bad.

Julie was close to Dean now, a couple feet away, and she gave him the most dazzling smile. He grinned back.

And then everything went wrong.

The chapel went dark. The windows shattered, and Cas tackled Dean as broken glass rained down on them. When Dean raised his head, he saw Sam several feet away, his face cut up and bloody, a large chunk of glass embedded in his forehead, his eyes open, but with no life in them.

Dean felt something die in him. "Sammy!" he cried, his voice breaking. He hauled himself to his feet, but before he could run to his brother, a woman screamed.

Dean looked up and another wave of cold horror rushed over him. "No," he breathed.

But it was happening again. Julie, in her beautiful white wedding dress, was pinned to the ceiling, pale and terrified, mouth opened wide in an endless scream, her dress bloody from a gash in her stomach. "No!" Dean screamed as she burst into flames. The fire spread across the ceiling of the chapel, and Dean couldn't move. Within a few seconds, Dean had lost Sam _and _Julie, and he couldn't move. What was the point?

The fire was swallowing the chapel, and he could do nothing but stare at the ceiling in shock and horror. "Dean!" Castiel roared. "Move!"

The next second, someone tackled him and Cas and Dean fell through the doorway of the chapel. Their surrounding changed to stark white walls and floors, but Dean didn't care.

He lay on his side, eyes closed, just focusing on the cold floor pressed against his cheek and nothing else, trying to recover. Sam and Julie weren't dead. They were alive, back on earth, waiting for him to come back. Because _he _was the one who was dead.

It was alarming how soothing that thought was to him.

Dean's eyes opened when a familiar voice started cackling. A burning, fiery hatred rushed through him as that all-too familiar voice shrieked, "Sammy! Oh, Julie, no!" He burst out laughing again as Dean got to his feet, breathing heavily, eyes dark with rage.

And there he was. Standing there in his cell, wearing a straightjacket and laughing gleefully. Metatron smirked at Dean, "What did you think of my visions? The one with Ben and Lisa was pretty well-done, I'd say, but that last one…" He chuckled. "I thought, why not give Dean Winchester his most secret desire, and then take away everything he cares about!" Metatron's gleeful eyes suddenly went icy. "It's exactly the kind of end a self-hating, pathetic maggot like yourself deserves."

Dean lunged forward and grabbed the collar of his shirt through the bars. "One more word and I will kill you, you sick son of a bitch," Dean snarled in his deadliest voice.

"You can't," Metatron giggled. "Kill me, and my law-abiding brethren will come down on you, and you know it. Besides, you tried it before, and dear old Sammy stopped you, remember?"

"Sam's not here now," Dean smirked.

Metatron looked scared for a fleeting moment, and then his expression hardened. "Go ahead, Dean Winchester. Kill me. It won't save Castiel, though. In fact, I'd say it's already too late to save him."

"What are you-?" Dean started, turning around to look back on Cas. The angel was still lying on the ground, pale and weaker than before, and as Dean watched, he began to choke until he coughed up his own blood.

"No," Dean breathed, panicked. "Cas!"

"He was already dying, and then when he had to save you, well…that took the last of his strength," Metatron smirked. "Say goodbye to dear old Cassie, and your ride out of here."

Dean turned back to the asshole of an angel and punched him hard in the face, probably breaking his nose. As good as that felt, he had other problems. He rushed to Cas's side, and his best friend weakly moved his hand to the inside of his jacket. "Do it," Cas whispered weakly.

Dean nodded and reached into the pocked inside Cas's trench coat, pulling out his angel blade and a small vial. Before Metatron could fully recover, Dean grabbed his jacket again and slammed his bloody face into the bars.

"You can't kill me!" Metatron shrieked, sounding truly scared.

"Not going to," Dean smirked, putting the small vial against Metatron's neck. "I've got a better plan."

"No, wait!" the angel shrieked, realizing what he intended to do. "You don't want to do that!"

"And why not?" Dean snapped.

"I still know where Castiel's true grace is," Metatron said quickly. "Let me go and I'll give it to you. He'll never need another angel's grace ever again."

"Nice try," Dean smirked. "I'm not letting you screw us over again. I think I'll just take your juiced up grace and give him that." And Dean made a small cut in Metatron's neck, carefully catching the silvery substance that oozed out in the vial. Metatron wailed throughout the entire process, until Dean screwed on the top of the vial and punched him again for good measure.

Dean rushed to Cas's side and poured the vial into his mouth. For a moment, nothing happened, and Dean worried he was too late. And then Castiel began to glow, and Dean scrambled away.

When the white light faded, Dean looked up to see Castiel standing tall and strong, looking healthy and kickass once more. He helped Dean up and gave him a hard to read look. "You saved me again, old friend," he sighed.

"I didn't-" Dean started.

"You did, and for that I thank you," Cas insisted. "Now, it's time I return the favor."

Cas touched his palm to Dean's forehead and everything glowed white.

* * *

><p>Sam watched Julie sadly. She had been sitting there in a chair next to Dean's…Dean's corpse for four hours. Hannah had tried to get her to move several times, but Julie simply refused. Granted, Sam hadn't left the room, either, but he couldn't help pacing around, trying to keep moving so he could ignore the fact that his brother was dead, and he had let it happen.<p>

He tried to tell himself that Dean would be right back. Hannah had never been involved in anything like this, and she had no idea how long it would take. So, things could be going excellently in heaven, and they could be waiting agonizingly down here for days even!

Dean had died far too many times though. Sam was far too accustomed to this grief, this awful, agonizing pain. At least usually he had a goal to work towards: doing anything he could to get Dean back. But now…all he could do was wait.

And Julie…well, she had never had to lose Dean before. Although she had watched him almost die several times before, there was nothing that could compare to actually seeing his body stiff and cold. She had never felt so alone, even though an angel and her best friend were also in the room, and he could be coming back any second. She had cried twice already, and not the gentle weeping of beautiful movie actresses, but full-out sobbing, where Sam had to hold her until she could control herself. He had cried a little himself the second time.

She loved Cas. He was Dean's best friend, and in the few times they had talked or seen each other since their initial meeting, they were quickly becoming close friends themselves. She would do anything to help him, and so would Sam and Dean, but… there must have been another way besides this! This…this _hell_.

Julie could feel the tears coming on again, and then suddenly Dean took a huge gasp and his green eyes flew open. Julie gave a soft scream, and then promptly burst into tears. Sam rushed to Dean's side and helped the weak, disoriented man sit up.

"Dean…Dean, you're alive," Sam said softly as Dean slowly adjusted, and Sam suddenly felt near tears himself.

Dean smiled sadly at Julie and Sam, so relieved to see them alive, and not at all like they were in the nightmarish vision Metatron had given him. He touched Julie's cheek as she wiped furiously at her tears, and she surprised him by practically tackling him in a hug.

"Never do that again," she muttered sullenly into his ear, and he chuckled, wrapping his arms around her. She started to laugh, too, which eventually turned into more crying.

Dean smiled slightly at Sam over her shoulder, and his little brother shook his head. "You scared me, Dean," Sam said carefully, and Dean heard the emotion in those four words and gave his brother an apologetic look.

"Castiel!" Hannah cried, and the three humans looked up to see the angel standing a few feet away, smiling slightly.

"Cas, you're okay!" Sam cried, getting to his feet and hugging to angel. Cas hugged Sam awkwardly back as Julie released Dean and quickly wiped her tears away.

"I'm so glad you're okay, Cas," she said with a watery smile.

"You have Dean to thank for that," Cas said. "I'd be dead for sure if it weren't for him…well, dying."

"I am glad you're alright, Castiel," Hannah said carefully, and Cas gave her a warm smile. Sam, Julie, and Dean exchanged a look, wondering what exactly had just passed between the two angels.

"So…you're back to full strength then, Cas?" Sam asked after a moment.

"Yes, I am," Castiel said, and he smiled slightly at the thought of it.

"And Metatron is down to no power," Dean smirked cockily. They all grinned at the thought of that.

"I'm not sure what to do now," Cas admitted after a pause.

Dean looked around at the two angels and two humans around him, all a little emotionally unstable right now. They all needed a pick me up, including him.

"I've got an idea," Dean said, standing up and pulling Julie up with him. "We have a movie to finish, don't we?"

Sam and Julie grinned at him, and so the five of them settled down in front of the TV and started _Back to the Future_ over again. After a lot of explaining, Hannah was able to understand what was going on, and the first time that a joke got Hannah and Castiel to laugh, Sam and Dean grinned at each other.

Julie drew closer to Dean, and he put his arm around her waist. "I love you," he murmured into her hair so softly she couldn't even hear it. His mind wandered away from the movie, to that vision of Julie coming down the aisle, looking so beautiful, his soon-to-be wife and the way that had made him feel.

But then that last vision came crashing through, shattering those happy thoughts. That vision of Julie burning on the ceiling like his mother had, and Sam's love, Jessica. The pain and horror of that moment was stronger than anything happiness a marriage could bring him.

And so Dean pushed all of those thoughts away, and just focused on this one moment, this one moment of peace and happiness with his friends. Because these moments were very few and far between, and he needed to appreciate them before he died again, and this time no one could bring him back.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven**

Dean woke with a start as someone knocked on the door of the motel room where he, Julie, and Sam were staying. He muttered a string of swear words as he kicked off his warm sheets and sat up. Next to him, Julie mumbled something and sat up, pushing her hair out of her face. "Dean…?" she asked sleepily.

Another harsh knock came on the door. Dean groaned and got out of bed, wearing boxers and a t-shirt. As he yanked on a pair of jeans, Sam groaned and sat up, watching blearily as Dean got dressed. "What's going on?" Sam asked, confused.

"Some asshole won't quit knocking," Dean snapped. He yanked a jacket on over his t-shirt and, after a moment of hesitation, grabbed the demon knife off the counter. They always demon-proofed wherever they were staying, but he still wanted to be safe.

A third impatient rap came on the door. "Just a minute!" Dean snapped, losing his cool.

"I'd like to speak to you _now_, if that's alright, Dean," an all-too familiar voice with a British accent snarled through the door.

Dean froze, surprised and on-edge. Sam slipped out of his bed and pulled on his own pair of jeans. "The hell do you want, Crowley?" Sam asked coldly as he got dressed himself.

"Wait. That's…?" Julie said softly, surprised. She got out of bed herself and quickly got dressed as the boys snapped at the king of hell through the motel door.

"I understand you boys are here on a case?" the king of hell sighed through the door.

"Some kids have been disappearing in town lately, yeah," Dean said carefully. "We got here last night, and we're going to see if there is a case here or not. Do you have a problem with that?"

Crowley chuckled. "No need to sound so hostile, Dean. I'm here to help you."

The brothers exchanged a look. "No offense, Crowley, but we really don't need your help," Sam said slowly.

"No? But I've been nothing but helpful to you boys!" he said, sounding truly offended.

They exchanged another look. "You've betrayed us time and time again, you helped send my brother to purgatory, and you then started killing off everyone we ever saved to get to us," Sam said in an icy voice. "_And_ you're the king of hell. You're not exactly my favorite person. You, Dean?"

"I'd have to agree with Sam on this, Crowley," Dean shrugged. "Sorry. Guess we'll be seeing you…well, hopefully never."

"Just let me in, boys," Crowley snapped, sounding completely done with their shit. "You're going to need my help in this case just as much as I'll need yours."

"And why is that?" Dean smirked in disbelief.

"Because I think that this case is about a Knight, boys. A bloody Knight of Hell."

Sam and Dean stared at each other in horror while Julie looked in-between them, confused. "Do I have your attention, boys?" Crowley smirked.

"I'm going to open the door, Crowley," Dean said slowly. "Then you're going to step inside into a devil's trap and _then _we'll talk."

"Fine, fine, whatever you want, darling," Crowley said dramatically. "May I come in now?"

Dean carefully stepped forward and opened the door. And there was Crowley, a rather short, smirking, older man with dark hair and a beard, dressed in a stylish black suit. "Hello, boys…" Crowley smirked in his usual fashion before stepping grandly into the motel room.

Dean quickly shut the door behind him, and Crowley tried to take a step further into the room. But the moment he tried to step off of the rug serving as a doormat, he was pushed back. "Clever," he drawled. He opened his mouth to say some other snappy response, but then he spotted Julie.

"Now, boys…who is this lovely young lady?" Crowley smiled winningly at her and she blinked, unimpressed. "Sam, did you finally get another girlfriend?"

"Why does everyone always assume—she's _my_ girlfriend, okay, Crowley?" Dean snapped, exasperated. "That's not the point, though. What is this you were saying about a _Knight_?"

"I've got news for you boys," Crowley said smugly. "But first—do tell me you have some fine whiskey in this hellhole of a motel room. It's quite disgusting, the squalor you boys live in."

"Nothing but cheap beer around here," Dean shrugged. "Sorry, pal."

"Of course," Crowley sighed dramatically. "Well, miss…" He glanced at Julie again.

"Julie Carters," she snapped, crossing her arms. "And before you ask, I'm a hunter, and I'm not your biggest fan after what you've done to these guys."

"I know you!" Crowley said, to their surprise. "I tried to kill you."

The three hunters stared at him. "Well, not me exactly," Crowley sighed. "One of my henchman, actually several of them have requested to go topside so they could try to kill some upstart hunter named Juliet Carters…none of them ever came back. Hmm. You're pretty tough, aren't you, Juliet?"

Julie just stared at him. "First off, it's Julie. And second of all, telling me how your men tried to kill me isn't helping me like you much."

"Of course, forgive me," Crowley said grandly. "I suppose you're working this case with these two idiots as well, then?" Julie smirked a little and nodded. "Well, hopefully that means I won't be the _only_ one here with the slightest idea what they're doing."

Dean opened his mouth to make a snappy reply, but was stopped when Julie laughed instead of protesting. "I don't know, Dean," she smirked. "He seems alright."

Both the king of hell and his girlfriend laughed a little at his expression. "This is too weird," Dean said after a moment. "I can't handle this. Just explain about this whole Knight thing, Crowley."

"Gladly," the demon replied calmly. "However, I would at least like a chair to sit on if I can't move out of this spot. We may be talking for a while…"

Sam pushed a rolling chair over to Crowley, and he somehow managed to settle into the cheap chair like it was a throne. "So, here's the deal, gentlemen…and lady." He winked at Julie. "I've been having some…management trouble in hell. Somehow, there are still Abbadon loyalists out there, and there are few demons truly loyal to me. Of course, I've been doing my job, and we're getting new souls in hell every day to replace all of those traitors. But…well, it's hard for me to admit, but…I'm losing my grip on hell. There's a lot of chaos and things going on that even _I _can't control."

"Yeah, yeah, you suck at your job," Dean muttered. "Get to the point."

"You've never been a very pleasant person, Dean," Crowley sighed. "The _point _is…a few days ago…or years ago, hell time is very fluid. Anyway, some time ago, a large number of the souls in hell vanished. I discovered later they had been sacrificed, and then all of the sudden, about half of the demons in hell up and left. The kingdom's utter chaos, so I've been topside, investigating, and I think I know why all those souls disappeared…"

Crowley paused for dramatic affect. "You think…they somehow brought back a Knight?" Sam guessed. "How? Dean killed Abbadon, and she was the only one left!"

"Not quite," Crowley admitted. "See…our old friend, Cain, you remember him, Dean?"

"Hard to forget meeting the father of murder," Dean muttered. He touched his forearm. "Plus I've still got his Mark."

"That's good; we'll be needing that," Crowley said. "You see…he didn't really kill his Knights. Any of them."

"What?" Dean cried. "But when we went to his house, he said-"

"I thought it better not to call his bluff, when he could kill me in a second," Crowley replied. "But he exaggerated the demise of the Knights. He did hunt down every single one of them, but he couldn't kill them. He had trained them, turned them into what they were, and he couldn't bring himself to destroy such _perfect _demons. So he placed them under a spell, stopping them, and he threw them into a deep pit of hell and that was the end of it. Except for Abbadon, of course, but you took care of her…"

"What are you saying?" Julie snapped.

"I'm saying, the Knights aren't in that pit anymore," Crowley snapped. "To reverse the spell would take a massive sacrifice, like dumping thousands of souls into the pit so the demons could consume them and rise. And I'm missing thousands of souls _and _some helpless Knights, so one would assume…"

"They're back," Julie breathed.

"How many?" Dean asked sharply.

"Five," Crowley replied gravely.

"You've got to be joking!" Sam cried. "We barely stopped _one_!"

"Unfortunately, I am serious, and deadly so. We've got Asmodeus, their master torturer, and a sex-crazed gambler from the rumors I've heard," Crowley rattled off. "Then there's Apollyon, a psychotic seductress and sister to Abbadon who probably won't be real fond of you for ending her sister, Dean. Then there's Adramalech…he's probably the weakest of the six Knights, so in olden days he preferred to prey on weaker victims like young women and children especially. And then there's Behemoth, the muscle, one of the most powerful, murderous demons in all of history. I hear he was a load of fun at parties. And then… Beelzebub."

"Like in the Queen song?" Dean asked. All three of the others shot him a look.

"Isn't that another name for Lucifer?" Sam asked nervously.

"Common mistake," Crowley sighed. "Beelzebub was Lucifer's favorite demon, and he did most of the pillaging and raping and torture for the big guy. He was practically Cain's equal when that guy was in his prime, and now that he's gone soft and given all his power to Dean…"

"So, basically, that guy is bad news," Dean summarized.

"Yes, thank you, Dean," Crowley said crossly. "I suppose I should have just said that, so you all could understand better with your tiny little brains."

Julie raised an eyebrow. "It's not too hard," she smirked. "This Asmodeus guy is the torturer, Apollyon's a seductress, Adramalech or whatever goes after kids, Behemoth has the raw power, and Beelzebub's the big baddy."

Crowley smirked at the boys. "I'm liking her more and more. She could give you a run for your money, Moose."

"Moose?" Julie mouthed questioningly at Dean. He gave her a _don't-ask_ look.

"And what makes you think that this is a Knight's work?" Sam snapped.

"If I'm right, they've been up here a couple weeks. I can't imagine them staying quiet forever, and this children disappearing act seems like it could easily be the handiwork of Adramalech. And since Dean is the only weapon we have capable of killing a Knight…"

"I don't do that anymore," Dean snapped.

"Of course you don't," Crowley sighed. "Either way…I could use your help. Are you in?"

The three of them exchanged a look. "I don't see why he would be lying," Julie shrugged after a minute.

"Fine," Dean snapped. "But we're calling all the shots, so don't get any ideas."

"Why would I do that?" the king of hell smirked. He gestured to the rug hiding the devil's trap holding him in place. "Well then…why don't you let me out of here so we can get to work…?"

* * *

><p>"So be honest with me," Julie muttered to Sam as they watched Dean and Crowley arguing a few feet away. "Do we trust this demon?"<p>

Sam sighed. "I don't know. He's helped us on more than one occasion. But then again, he's also betrayed or tried to kill us on more than one occasion, so…basically, Crowley works with us when it's beneficial to him, and he works against us when we're doing something that could hurt him. As long as we have the same goal…I'd say we can trust him at least a little."

Julie nodded. Before she could reply, Dean stormed over with Crowley following him calmly, smirking.

"The _king _here says that we need to split up," Dean explained in a moody voice. He was still a bit grumpy about being woken up by Crowley, so anything the demon said was going to piss him off.

"Three children have already gone missing in the past week," Crowley sighed. "Whatever's taking them probably isn't going to stop just because we're here. So I just thought instead of all of us going together to talk to some weeping mothers, two of us can go take precautions with the houses of other children. You know, to try and keep even _more _children from disappearing and possibly dying. But by all means, if you want to risk that so that all three of you can watch me, go ahead, Dean."

The hunter and demon glared at each other until Dean finally backed down. "Okay, so that's not the _worst _idea I've ever heard," he muttered sullenly.

Crowley smirked cockily at him, and Julie touched Dean's arm gently, stopping him from launching into another argument with the king of hell. "So who will talk to the families who've lost kids, and who will go protect the other families?" Julie asked quickly.

"Julie and I can talk to the parents whose kids are missing," Sam suggested.

Crowley gave him a careful, calculating look. "I don't think Dean is very open to working with me," the demon pointed out drily.

"I'm really sorry about this, Sammy, but…can you go with this son of a bitch?" Dean growled.

"What did I ever do to you, Dean Winchester?" Crowley said, mock-offended.

"Really?" Dean snapped. "I've lost track of how many times you've tried to have us killed, Crowley-"

"Oh, move on," the king of hell sighed dramatically. "I mean lately. I've done nothing but help you, Dean. I got you the Mark and the Blade, I got you Abbadon-"

"That was all to help yourself," Sam snapped. "And anyway, the Mark ended up almost making Dean a…"

He stopped abruptly. There had been an unspoken pact between Sam and Dean not to speak of what had happened when Dean had almost killed Metatron. The Blade, Mark, and his hatred of the angel before him combined had driven Dean to become something evil, almost…demonic. And then, Dean had refused to give up the Blade, and Cas and Sam had been forced to leave him, unable to save him from himself.

"I'm also the one who saved our boy here," Crowley snapped. "If Dean had kept on killing with that Blade, it would have made him a demon, and yet, _I'm _the one who actually helped him give it up. And where was his loving brother then, when he needed him most? Hmm?"

This time, Sam was the one who moved towards Crowley, looking for a fight. Julie stepped in front of Sam and gently pushed him back. "Come on, guys. Please," she pleaded softly. "So, there's a lot of water under the bridge. But I think we're all on the same side, and if we don't work together, kids could get hurt. So can we please just…put it behind us?"

She looked between the three men, and Sam and Dean sighed and relaxed. "Juliet, darling, you have no idea how much these two boys have needed a girl like you to keep them from making foolish mistakes," Crowley chuckled.

"My name is Julie, Crowley," was all she said in reply.

And so Sam and Crowley went off grudgingly in a Mercedes that Crowley had probably stolen to take some protective measures on the houses of children, while Dean and Julie drove in the Impala to the house of a woman named Gwen Stephens, a single mother with five children, the oldest of which had disappeared four days ago.

Dean and Julie marched up to the front door in their typical FBI dress clothes. Julie knocked on the door and heard a woman shouting. Maybe twenty seconds later, the door opened and a small girl of about five or six stared up at them. She had light brown hair in pigtails and wore a cute, pink dress. However, she looked a little terrified staring up at Dean, who towered over her.

Julie knelt slightly and said in a gentle voice, "Hi, sweetie. What's your name?"

The girl stared at her, wide-eyed and frightened.

"I'm Julie," she said with a smile. "I'm here to talk with your mother. Is she home?"

"Just a moment!" a woman cried, and a few second later, a slightly-overweight woman who looked to be about forty rushed to the door, cradling a baby of about six months in one arm. She herded the girl away from the door, saying, "Lily, Lily, go keep an eye on the twins. I need to talk to these nice people for a moment."

The girl nodded and rushed away, looking back once to stare at Julie again. The woman let Dean and Julie in and shut the door behind them.

"Mrs. Stephens?" Dean asked her politely.

"Yes, that's me. I'm so sorry about the mess," she sighed, sounding flustered. "The kids are crazy as always, and I haven't had a chance to clean in ages. A lot of questioning going on, obviously."

Gwen Stephens took a deep, steadying breath. "You don't look like police," she said, really looking at them for the first time.

"We're from the FBI," Dean explained, and they held out their badges. "I'm Agent Jackson, and this is my partner, Agent Evans."

A wail went up from the next room. "Well, Agent Jackson, it's nice to meet you," Gwen said quickly. "This is my kid, Max. Hold him for me, will you?"

And without another word, she pushed the baby into Dean's arms and rushed into the next room. Dean awkwardly held the little boy, who blearily opened his eyes, saw that Dean was not his mother, and began to wail as well.

"I—um—Julie?" Dean stammered, trying to rock the baby and shush him at the same time.

Julie rolled her eyes, although his nervousness and inexperience with babies made her want to grin and hug him. She gently took Max from Dean and settled the baby into her arm the way Gwen carried him. Julie shushed the baby gently, rocking him slightly, and he quickly calmed down. She hummed softly to the baby as he stared up at her, wide-eyed.

At first, Dean was just relieved the pressure was not on him to take care of the baby. But then, as his panic passed, something strange bloomed in him. Seeing Julie holding that little child and humming to him…it made Dean feel a strange sort of happiness and longing. She was so beautiful to him in that moment, holding that child, a mother if only for a couple of minutes. And it brought up something in him, something he had pushed down years ago and buried, or so he thought. A foolish, impossible desire to one day settle down, have a beautiful wife and a family, his own little family, to have a child, _his_ child…

"Come here," Julie said softly. Dean blinked. "He won't bite you, Dean! Come here, and look at him. Isn't he just precious?"

She beamed at the little baby, and Dean moved closer to Julie. And the little baby was indeed adorable, a chubby, rosy-cheeked little guy with a tuft of light brown hair and huge, dark eyes. He opened his mouth and gurgled a little, and Dean found himself chuckling.

Julie beamed at Dean, and he put his arm around her waist. God, there was just something about seeing her with a child, even if it wasn't theirs…it made him inexplicably happy.

Dean and Julie looked up as two curly-haired boys who couldn't be more than four dashed past and bounded up the stairs, closely followed by the little girl from earlier, Lily. "Thank you," Gwen sighed, and they realized she was only a couple feet away. "It's a lot of work taking care of fi…four kids on your own."

For a moment, it seemed her composure would snap and the woman would begin sobbing. Then she swallowed and forced a smile. "Anyway. You two got any kids of your own yet?"

Julie and Dean blinked and said nervously, "Oh, we're not…"

Gwen smirked at them. "You really expect me to believe you two aren't in love? I won't tell anyone, if it'll get you two in trouble at work. But that moment there, with Max…" She smiled sadly at them. "It was sweet. Reminded me of Jonathan and I…"

"Your husband?" Julie guessed gently.

"Yes," Gwen sighed. "He died last year. Cancer. Never even got to see his son…" She looked down at her baby, near tears. "And now, now James is gone and I just…"

She looked about ready to break down. "We're very sorry, Mrs. Stephens," Dean said gently. "We are going to do everything in our power to find your son, and these other children as well. If you could just tell us what happened…"

"I have no idea!" she cried, wiping at her eyes. "I put my kids to bed, and then when I got up the next morning, he was just gone. No signs of struggle, no blood, no… there was nothing. He was just…gone."

She was clearly distraught, so Dean and Julie gave her some space. They went up to the boy's bedroom and looked around for a while. The room looked innocent enough, a few Legos dumped in a pile in one corner, the bed unmade, posters of a spaceship and the planets on one wall. A pretty typical room for an eight-year-old boy. They couldn't find anything suspicious, until Dean noticed something on the windowsill…

"Damn," he breathed, running a finger through a thick layer of yellow dust on the windowsill.

"Is that…?" Julie started.

"Sulfur. More than I've ever seen."

They exchanged a look. "So, it's demons," Julie said after a moment.

"A pretty freaking powerful one," Dean added.

"Do you think…do you think Crowley's right?" Julie asked, concerned.

"I'm afraid he might be," he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose to ward off the oncoming headache. Killing Abbadon had been hard enough, and it had nearly cost him his humanity. If there were _five_ Knights of Hell now roaming the earth…

Dean picked up his cell and dialed Crowley's number. The demon picked up on the second ring. "Have you found something, Dean?" he asked, sounding a bit smug.

Dean sighed. "Alright, Crowley. I hate to say it, but I think you may be right. Which means…we are in a hell of a lot of trouble."

"That's the first thing you've said all day that I actually agree with," Crowley replied. Dean gulped. If he and the king of the hell were _agreeing o_n something…well, that meant that things were pretty bad, and about to get a hundred times worse.

* * *

><p>Crowley hung up the phone and turned to the youngest Winchester who stood by the stolen Mercedes, waiting stony-faced and cold as he always was towards Crowley.<p>

"What did Dean want?" Sam asked gruffly as Crowley reached him.

"Nothing much," Crowley said nonchalantly, smirking to himself when Sam took the bait.

"Come on, Crowley. What's going on? Are he and Julie okay?"

"They're fine, Moose," Crowley sighed dramatically. "Just called to say they found sulfur at the sight of one of the disappearances, and lots of it. The great Dean Winchester thinks that _I _might be right!"

"I still don't see why he didn't just call me," Sam muttered sullenly.

"He probably realized that I am obviously the best ally he can have working this case. I hope you're not too jealous, Sam. I'd hate to ruin the dream team's dynamic."

"Just stop, Crowley," Sam snapped. "I'd really like to be able to work this case with you without wanting to kill you, but you're making that a little difficult at the moment."

"Someone's sensitive today," the demon smirked. "Could it be because Dean is the one who gets the beautiful girl, while you get to sit by and watch?"

Sam's expression got even darker, if that was possible. "I don't know what the hell you mean by that, Crowley…"

"Never mind. My mistake," the king of hell said innocently, smiling a little to himself when he turned away. He had spent enough time with the Winchester brothers to tell when there might be trouble in the home, and he could sense a slight unease with Sam. And he would bet almost anything it had something to do with Dean's beautiful hunter girlfriend…

"Can we just focus on the case?" Sam snapped. "We've got three more houses we should demon-proof, and then we should meet up with Dean and Julie before I get too fed-up with you and do something I might regret."

"You talk tough, but could you really kill me?" Crowley asked, a challenge. "If I'm right, and the Knights are back, I'm your only hope at stopping them. I'm the only one who knows where the Blade is, and without it there is no way to kill them. You'll lose before you even start."

They stared down each other for a moment, and then Sam opened the driver's seat of the car and snapped, "Let's just get this over with."

"Oh, come on, Moose! You know you've been dying to spend time with your favorite demon again," Crowley said teasingly, getting into the car as well.

As the hunter and demon drove off to the next house where young children lived, a mailman and the old woman who lived next door to the house they had just demon-proofed stepped around the corner of the house and watched the car disappear. "Our lord was right; they came," the mailman said, sounding caught between fear and excitement.

"It sounds like the other Winchester and that upstart girl with them are here, too," the old woman said in a surprisingly low, cruel voice. "I'm surprised the king would really stoop so low as to work with those maggots."

"I'm not," the man replied. "They seem to be his favorite little pets, especially the older one, the one with the Mark."

"Yes," the old woman said thoughtfully. "If he's here, we should warn our lord. He could be a serious threat."

"I'm not worried," the other demon chuckled. "Three humans and a demon are no match for us, as long as our lord fights with us."

"These aren't just three humans and a demon though, you fool!" the old woman snapped scathingly. "These are the same men who took down the queen and stopped the apocalypse years ago, or have you forgotten? And the king is a formidable fighter, even if he is going soft with these humans…"

"We will be fine," the male demon chuckled confidently. "No one can stand against a Knight of Hell."

Both demons chuckled darkly. "Let's go tell him," she chuckled. "Everything is going according to plan."

And the poor humans they were possessing opened their mouths wide as dark smoke poured out of them and sped off to their waiting master, leaving two crumpled humans behind on the ground.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve**

Julie and Dean got back to the motel room first. They changed from their FBI outfits into more comfortable jeans, t-shirts, and jackets and settled onto their bed, watching crappy cable shows for an hour or so until someone unlocked the door and Sam and Crowley walked in. Judging by their expressions, the two of them had not gotten along nearly as well as Julie and Dean had while working.

"What took you guys so long?" Dean asked, getting up.

"Crowley decided he needed to disappear on me halfway through," Sam snapped, glaring at the king of hell.

"You should be thanking me, boys," Crowley smirked. "Once we were pretty sure that a Knight of Hell was behind this, I went off to get some ingredients for a spell that should locate any demons nearby. One use only, so we better be smart about it."

"I hate to say it, but good work, Crowley," Dean muttered. "What's the deal with the spell?"

"I'd try to explain it, but I'm afraid it's too much for your thick head," he said condescendingly. "The point is, it will locate any demons nearby, besides me, obviously. Of course, they already know we're here, so we won't exactly have the element of surprise…"

The three hunters exchanged alarmed looks. "What are you talking about?" Sam asked.

"Oh, come on, Moose," Crowley sighed. "Surely you've noticed all the suspicious people guarding almost every house we demon-proofed, just watching us?"

Sam didn't reply, since he hadn't. He had been so concerned with the demon he was being forced to work with and the thought of Dean and Julie off somewhere, possibly in danger that he must have been off his game.

"No?" Crowley smirked. "Well, I counted four different demons following us around town."

"Why didn't you take them out?" Dean snapped.

"They didn't attack us because they were afraid, Dean," Crowley said slowly, so he could understand. "They weren't sure what to do, and I doubt they knew where you were, and every demon in their right mind, even Knights, are at least a little afraid of the man with the Mark of Cain. They were waiting to see what we would do, and so I did the same. Besides, if I attacked them and a Knight appeared, your little brother and I would have been annihilated. So you should be thanking me."

The two brothers glared at Crowley. "He's got a point, boys," Julie admitted. "Until we know for sure a Knight is really here and where he is, starting a fight unprepared is about the most suicidal thing we could do."

"Great," Dean muttered. "So for all we know, we're surrounded by demons, and a Knight of Hell could be literally right around the corner, and we don't have any way to kill him."

"Well…" Crowley started.

"No," Sam snapped, taking a step in-between Dean and the king of hell.

"Come _on_, boys!" the demon sighed, exasperated. "We're talking about one of the most powerful, cruel, dangerous demons in all of existence. If there's a way to kill him, shouldn't we take it?"

"No," Sam and Julie both said this time. Julie moved closer to Dean as she said, "There are other ways to take one out, right? Dean said that before you were able to chop Abbadon up and bury her in different places, and that kept her down, until you put her back together, at least."

"He wouldn't be dead," Crowley pointed out darkly. "If another Knight found him and pieced him back together…"

"We'd try again," Julie insisted. "The Blade's not worth it."

Dean looked in-between his brother and his girlfriend, both standing protectively around him, defending him from the mere idea of using the Blade again. He knew he should be touched, and he was, but there was also a part of him that thought that he might as well just use the Blade to kill the Knights, and if he went dark again, then just let Crowley or someone finish him off. Was his life really worth letting five horrible, powerful, impossible-to-kill demons roam the earth?

And then there was the Mark. It had flared up the first time he saw the sulfur in James Stephens' bedroom, and in every other disappearance site they'd come across. He knew this was the work of a Knight, and so did the Mark of Cain. It was burning like it hadn't in months, and as much as he tried to ignore it, it was calling him to take up the First Blade again and finish what he had started. Wasn't that his job, anyway? To save people and kill evil, no matter what the cost to himself?

"Fine," Crowley said. "As long as Dean doesn't want me to go get it, I'll leave the Blade where it is. That is what you want, isn't it, Dean?" The demon smirked slightly at him, and Dean knew then that Crowley must realize what this conversation and the presence of the Knights back on earth must be doing to him.

"Dean?" Julie asked gently. He looked down and saw her blue eyes staring up at him, concerned and a little afraid.

He cleared his throat and looked away. He met Sam's eyes for a second and saw the little spark of fear in his brother's eyes. That's what decided it for Dean. If two of the people he loved most were so scared at the thought of him taking up the Blade again, then it couldn't be right.

"No," Dean said stiffly. "That's not what I want, Crowley."

"Are you sure?" the demon asked carefully. "It can't be easy. The wielder of the Mark is also meant to wield the Blade. You're meant to carry that Blade, Dean. And think of the good you could do with it!"

"He doesn't want it, Crowley!" Sam snapped. "So back the hell off!"

Crowley raised his hands in surrender. "Alright, alright. My mistake." After a tense silence, the king of hell said, "Well, why don't I set up for the spell, while you people do something useful?"

"We should make some of those devil's-trap bullets," Sam said, and the hunters went to work while Crowley drew circles and symbols on the floor in what he assured them was lamb's blood. He put several different ingredients, including bones, feathers, and what looked sickeningly like an animal heart into a bowl and, when the time had come, he lit them on fire, saying a Latin incantation in a low voice. Once the ingredients were nothing but ashes, he spread them across a map of the county, and a small cluster of them glowed fiery red.

"It looks like they're in…an abandoned prison about seven miles from here," Crowley read. He cleared up the mess and turned to the hunters. "Well, boys. Juliet darling. Are we ready to go take on a Knight of Hell?"

The hunters exchanged a nervous look. As for an answer, Julie turned to Crowley and snapped, "For the last time, it's Julie," and walked confidently past him out of the room, Sam and Dean following her.

Crowley couldn't help but smirk a little as he followed them out.

* * *

><p>"Amateurs," Crowley muttered. "If a bunch of demons are kidnapping children and hiding them away somewhere, the last place you should keep them is the only abandoned prison in town. I mean, really! Clearly I must be teaching these demons wrong or something."<p>

The four of them stood staring up at the dark, run-down prison in front of them. Julie had to admit, it was the stuff of cheap Hollywood-horror-movie sets. Any hunter worth their salt would check here first, with or without a fancy spell.

"I doubt they're really trying to hide from us," Sam pointed out grimly. "We probably don't even stand a chance."

"Aren't you a regular old ray of sunshine?" Dean muttered. "Well, guys. What do you say? Go in guns blazing, try not to get killed?"

"It's a miracle you have survived this long," Crowley sighed, exasperated. "Oh, wait. I forgot. You two have died so many times I've lost track!"

He turned to Julie. "Juliet, darling, please tell me _you've _got a better plan than _that_."

Julie smirked a little. "Yeah, I do, actually. First, you're going to quit calling me that. And secondly, I'd say saving the kids is top priority. So, if you and Sam and Dean could distract any other demons, I think I should be able to find and get them out safely."

"Not a bad idea," Crowley admitted. "You know, maybe I'll just work with her instead of you two idiots."

Sam and Dean rolled their eyes. "Alright," Sam said. "No point in putting it off. Ready?"

"No," Dean and Julie both replied, but the four of them forged ahead anyway.

The door was unlocked, which was never a good sign. Dean walked in first, with Crowley behind him, then Julie, and Sam taking up the rear. They walked in silence through a dark hallway, knives and guns held at the ready. Nothing happened. No one came out, no demons tried to kill them. If Crowley was right, and the demons knew they were here, they were letting them wander around here on purpose.

Julie opened her mouth, about to say something to Dean. But before she could get a word out, Dean swore violently and there was a dull thud a few feet in front of her.

Everything exploded into chaos. Julie ducked out of pure instinct and a knife whistled over her head. Behind her, Sam was tackled by another demon, and he struggled for a moment to overpower the possessed man fighting him. Sam drove an angel blade into the demon's gut, killing him, while Crowley waved his arm and the demon assaulting him flew several feet back.

As for Dean, he was fighting two demons at the same time. As Julie watched, he slashed the throat of one demon with the knife Ruby had once given them. The demon who had tried to kill Julie just a few seconds earlier leapt forward to take the place of the demon Dean had just killed.

A second wave of demons rushed in, and Sam yelled, "Julie, go! Find the kids."

She hesitated for a moment, but Sam, Dean, and Crowley were regrouping, even against the nearly ten demons facing them. And, even though they were vastly outnumbered, somehow Julie wasn't too concerned for those three men.

She took off down the hall until she reached the first locked cell she'd come across. Thankfully, the door had a simple enough lock, and the keys were hanging nearby on the wall. She pulled them down and unlocked the door, trying to ignore the sounds of a battle behind her and the terrifying thought that any second one of those demon's blades could go through Sam or Dean's heart.

The door creaked open on its rusty hinges, and Julie poked her head inside. A small whimper came from the corner, and she spotted three small, dirty children huddled against the wall.

Her heart broke for them. They stared at her, wide-eyed and terrified as she entered the room.

The oldest-looking one, with a dirty mop of brown eyes and big, dark eyes tried to push the youngest one, a small, blond girl behind him. "Hey," Julie said gently. "Are you James Stephens?"

The boy stared up at her. "Look, I'm here to help you," she said as gently as she could, trying to ignore the gunshot that has just went off where the others were fighting. "We need to get you out of here, okay? Can you walk?"

The oldest boy and the little girl stayed where they were, but the other boy stood shakily. "Are you going to hurt us?" he whispered.

He heart broke for them all over again. "No, no I'm not," Julie assured them. "I'm here to help, really. Come on, let's get you out of here. You want to go home, right? Let's get you home safe."

The oldest boy, who she was almost certain was James Stephens, stood up. "How do we get out?" he asked as bravely as he could, although his voice shook a little.

"Follow me." The boys took the hand of the little girl, and the three of them ran after her as they rushed for a door.

They had nearly reached the exit when a tall, muscular, bearded man stepped in front of them, blocking the door. Julie pushed the kids back behind her as he held up a large butcher knife and grinned.

"Get in that room and keep the door shut no matter what happens," she ordered James quietly, and he pulled the younger children into a side room, slamming the door.

"I'll still get them," the demon chuckled darkly. "You didn't save those children. They're going to die, just like you, sweetheart."

"Shut up and fight me," Julie snapped, pulling an angel blade off her belt.

The demon lunged forward, but she was faster. She dodged his first strike and deflected his second one away from her head. She was quick and clever, but she could tell from those two strikes he was much stronger than her. She couldn't overpower him, so she'd have to beat him another way.

"Well, it's pretty obvious _you're _not the Knight of Hell," she smirked.

He growled. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"A big, bumbling idiot like you couldn't be one of the strongest demons alive. In fact, I doubt a Knight would deign to work with the likes of you. I bet there isn't even a Knight here, is there?"

"Fool," the demon chuckled. "You have no idea what you're up against. We are just a test set by our lord. This trap is nothing compared to what's in store for you…"

"So he's not here then?" Julie asked.

"No, he's-" The demon stopped, realizing he'd said too much.

Julie grinned. "Thanks, pal. That's all I needed."

"You won't live to tell," he snarled, leaping at her.

But Julie fired one of the bullets they had prepared into his skull, one with a devil's trap carved into it. The demon was powerless to move or fight until Julie stabbed him in the heart and finished him off.

Once the demon was dead, the place was eerily quiet. Julie stood frozen, trying not to panic. Finally, she gave in and yelled, "Dean? Sam?"

"Jules!" Dean yelled in reply, and she visibly relaxed. "Where are you?"

"By the exit!" she yelled back, and a few second later, Dean, Sam, and Crowley jogged around the corner. There was blood on their hands, but they looked remarkably unharmed for having just fought off all of those demons.

"Nice job," Sam smirked, noticing the dead demon on the ground.

Julie checked to make sure they were all okay before getting the kids out of the room where they were still hiding. As they took the trembling children to their cars, Julie explained what information she had been able to get out of the demon before she killed him.

"So that was just a test?" Sam asked nervously. "And you still don't know where the Knight is?"

"And I say we get out of here before he shows up," Julie said. "I don't think we're ready for a fight yet."

The others agreed. So they drove the children back into town and, at just past midnight, the four "FBI agents" returned the kids to their families.

The police thanked them profusely. Crying parents shook their hands and embraced them, saying through their tears how grateful they were. While Crowley rolled his eyes and waited impatiently for the people to leave with their kids, Dean watched Julie interacting with the kids. The little girl had been clinging to her leg, still scared, until her parents arrived. The little girl gave a shriek of joy and rushed to her mother, who held the girl and sobbed. The father shook Julie's hand and thanked her about a hundred times. Before the little girl and her family left, the child returned to Julie and hugged her for a long moment.

Dean couldn't help it; he smiled warmly at them. There was just something about seeing Julie with kids that made him love her even more, if that was possible.

As people began to clear out of the station, Sam approached Julie. "That went better than I could have hoped," he sighed, watching James Stephens leave with his family. Gwen Stephens turned to give them one last grateful look before ushering her large family out of the police station.

"It's not over, though," Julie sighed. "This is for real, Sam. If there's one Knight out there, who's to say there aren't five?" He didn't reply. "How are we going to do this, Sam?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "We'll be working around the clock now. And just when things had been calming down a bit, too."

"Sam…" Julie glanced over at Dean, who was talking to Crowley a few feet away. She lowered her voice and asked, "Do you think we should let Dean use the Blade again? If it's the only way to kill them…"

"No," Sam insisted. "Look, Julie…you didn't see what that thing did to him. I care about Dean way too much to let him go dark like that again."

Julie nodded. "I know. I know, you're right, it's just…what if we can't always win like this? What if people do die because we won't let Dean kill these Knights? Won't that be our fault? Can we really just let that happen?"

He sighed. "I don't know, Julie. I don't know what we're supposed to do. I know we should try to kill them, but…it's _Dean_."

They hugged for a long moment, trying not to imagine losing Dean to darkness and failing miserably. Crowley watched them embracing and his brow furrowed. "So, Dean," he said after a moment, and the hunter turned to face him. "Things going well with you and this Julie girl, then?"

"Yeah, they are," Dean said. "Do you have a problem with that, Crowley? Because if you're going to try and mess up what she and Sam and I have going, give me fair warning so I can take you out of the picture. We're happy right now, and I'd like to keep it that way."

"Oh, calm down, Dean," Crowley sighed. "You couldn't kill me and you know it. We're besties, remember?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Anyway, I'm actually looking out for your best interests," Crowley continued. "Have you ever noticed anything…_concerning _about dear old Sammy and your lovely lady friend?"

Dean's expression darkened. "What? No. The hell are you going on about, Crowley?"

"I've just noticed…they seem pretty _close_ to me," the king of hell commented.

"Yeah. So?" Dean snapped defensively.

"I'm just saying…you might want to keep an eye on them," Crowley said lightly. "Wouldn't want your brother stealing your girl, would you?"

"There's nothing going on there, Crowley," Dean snapped. "So why don't you keep your nose out of other people's business and worry about your own problems? Like these Knights we've apparently got roaming around."

"Alright, no need to be so defensive about it," Crowley smirked. "And we'll worry about those Knights once we get back to your place and we can do some more in-depth research."

"Wait. He's coming back to the bunker with us?" Sam asked, and Crowley and Dean looked up to see Julie and Sam approaching. Everyone else was gone, and they were free to go now.

"Admit it, boys," Crowley said. "You're going to need my help on this and you know it."

The three hunters exchanged exasperated looks. "He's probably right," Julie muttered.

"Fine," Dean snapped. "But I am still driving, and you sure as hell are not riding shotgun!"

Within an hour, the four of them were back on the road, driving through the night in the hopes to get back to the bunker as soon as possible, in case the Knight was still around. Sam and Dean rode up front, struggling slightly to stay awake, while Julie and Crowley chatted in the back. It was a little unnerving for both brothers how well Crowley and Julie seemed to get along. Honestly, if he didn't constantly call her Juliet darling, to her extreme annoyance, Sam might be a little worried about getting replaced.

Dean began to doze off at one point, and the car began to drift towards a ditch in the side of the road. All three passengers cried out, and Dean snapped back to attention and quickly got them back on the straight path.

"Are you still sure you should be driving?" Crowley snapped. "I don't need sleep like you humans do. I could easily drive without putting every other passenger at risk."

"I might be working with you, but that doesn't mean I trust you," Dean replied coldly. "For all I know, I let you drive and you'll crash the car and try to kill us all, since you can just walk away no matter what happens."

"Really, Dean? Did you miss the part where I need you to kill these Knights of Hell?"

The two of them launched into yet another argument as Dean drove down the moonlit highway. Julie looked ahead of them and then screamed when a dark figure appeared in the middle of the road, right in front of the car.

Dean tried to swerve to miss the figure, but they vanished suddenly. It was too late to save the car, though, and before the four of them could do more than cry out, the Impala careened into the ditch with a sickening crunch.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen**

"Julie? Jules, honey, you've got to get up. Jules. Jules!"

Julie blearily opened her eyes. Everything in her ached, and there was something wet and sticky coating her arm. Somehow, through her throbbing head and fuzzy vision, she made out Dean standing over her, reaching out for her. The ride side of his face was scratched up and bloody, but he didn't look too bad for the fact that they had just crashed into a ditch.

Julie took his hand and, after cutting herself out of her mangled seatbelt, let him help her out of the car. The Impala was on its side in the ditch, and the engine was smoking, but it didn't look too bad. They could probably get it working again soon enough. The airbags had gone off and were now lying deflated in the front seats. Julie thanked God for those airbags, because otherwise Sam and Dean, who were both a little scratched up and bloody, but for the most part alright, could very well have died.

Crowley stood nearby, with nothing but a lump on his head to show for the crash. He was looking around nervously. "Where did it go?" he asked in a low, concerned voice.

"What _was _it?" Sam asked in the same tone.

Dean didn't seem to care. He held Julie up, although she could stand on her own, and fretted over the bump on her head and the cuts on her arm from broken glass. "Are you okay, Jules?" he asked, not seeming to care at all about the blood on the side of his face.

"Yeah," she said, still out of breath. "What about you?"

He seemed to notice his wounds for the first time and wiped at some of the blood before giving up. "Everybody okay?" he asked louder.

"For now," Crowley muttered. "I'd bet almost anything that person you almost hit was our missing Knight, though. We need to get out of here before-"

"Before what?" a man's thin, reedy voice called, and someone walked out of the trees bordering the ditch they were in.

"How long do you want to bet he was waiting for that moment?" Dean muttered sarcastically, brave and funny in the face of danger as always. Still, she saw the way he tensed up at that voice, and Julie noticed Dean's arm, the one bearing the Mark of Cain, twitching.

The Knight, for surely it was him, walked towards them slowly, chuckling. Sam and Dean both moved in front of Julie, and she would have rolled her eyes at them if she wasn't so concerned with this demon before them. He looked surprisingly ordinary. Not very intimidating, just a tall, thin man with stringy hair that was once blond but was greying. He looked more like a washed-up druggie than a dangerous Knight of Hell, but his presence was pure evil.

"I must admit, I'm impressed you're all still breathing," he said in that same surprising thin, high voice from before. Not very terrifying. "I thought my demons would be able to do at least a little damage."

"That little trap back there?" Dean smirked. "That was nothing, pal."

"I had hoped you would survive that," the Knight admitted, grinning at Dean with yellowed teeth. "Dean, isn't it? I can sense the Mark on you. So you must be the one who killed dear old Abbadon."

The three hunters and demon stared up at him, not replying. The Knight started to laugh, which sounded dangerously like him hacking up a lung. "Oh, don't worry. I hated Abbadon. Treacherous little bitch. Thought she was better than the rest of us, and so she split off from us when Cain started hunting us. And I'm sure she thought she had won when we were thrown in that pit, but…well, look who's laughing now!"

The four still just stared at him. "Forgive me, I'm being rude," he said once he was done gloating over Abbadon's fall. "I haven't even introduced myself. My name is Adramalech, and I-"

"You're the weakest Knight, right? The one who only goes after kids and women because you can't take on a real opponent," Dean smirked.

Julie smacked his arm. "I would consider myself a real opponent," she snapped, and he quickly corrected himself.

"Now tell me…who is this delightful girl?" Adramalech chuckled, cocking his head. "I've heard of Sam and Dean Winchester, of course, and then there's the old king, Crowley-"

"_Old _king?!" Crowley cried, offended, but they all ignored him.

"But who, my dear, are you?" Adramalech asked Julie, taking a step closer. Sam and Dean both moved protectively in-between them, but Julie rolled her eyes and pushed them aside to stand even with them.

"Julie Carters," she snapped. "And, yes, I might not be as famous as a Winchester or the king of hell, but I sure as hell am not just some weak woman that you can prey on."

"I wouldn't dream of it," Adramalech said in a sugar sweet voice. "A pretty little thing like you? No, I'm afraid I'll probably have to give you to Beelzebub. He usually ends up getting all the pretty female slaves…"

"Did I say anything about being a slave?" Julie asked him.

"Well, you see…Julie, is it? Well, anyway…my orders were to make a case for Sam and Dean Winchester, draw them out, and take them to the new king. You weren't technically supposed to be here, but I'm sure that Beelzebub will have some purpose for you."

"Well, he's not having her," Dean snapped. "Or us, for that matter. I have to admit, I wouldn't be too choked up about it if you took that guy over there"—he nodded towards Crowley, who flipped him off—"but taking _us_? Yeah, that's not gonna happen."

Adramalech chuckled. "Lord, I missed you humans. Your naivety, your stupidity, your stubbornness…it's so amusing."

Sam suddenly raised his arm and fired his gun. But Adramalech dodged it somehow and lunged forward so quickly that Dean and Julie couldn't move to stop him. Before they quite knew what was happening, the Knight of Hell had Sam's arm twisted behind his back, and he was pressing Sam's gun to the hunter's temple.

"Sammy!" Dean cried, taking a step forward, but Julie grabbed his arm and stopped him.

"Clever girl," Adramalech smirked. "Careful, Dean Winchester, or I may have to kill your brother. Although I am to bring him in, technically, you're the only one who _must _be alive."

Sam winced as Adramalech twisted his arm again. With Sam's tall, muscular build, you would think he could take down this scrawny demon, but it was clear that this body Adramalech was possessing did not hinder his strength in any way.

"Now, Sam," Adramalech said in a reprimanding tone. "Didn't anyone ever teach you? It's rude to shoot at people you barely know."

"If I get to know you, then can I shoot you?" Sam replied with a grim smirk.

Adramalech shook his head disapprovingly. "I'm not appreciating your attitude much. Perhaps you need to be taught a lesson."

And before anyone could so much as cry out, the Knight of Hell jerked Sam's arm in an odd angle and Sam screamed in pain.

"_No_!" Dean roared, and he lunged forward towards Sam. This time, Adramalech dropped Sam on the ground and moved towards Crowley now, ignoring Dean and Julie as they rushed to Sam's side. His arm was broken, bent at a horrifyingly angle, and Sam's teeth were gritted in pain, his breaths fast and sharp.

"Oh, god, Sam…" Julie whispered. There wasn't much she could do for him now, not without a proper first aid kit, but give him her hand to squeeze in pain as they helped him sit up.

"Well, while they're busy with that," Adramalech sighed as he approached Crowley. "I've been wanting to speak with you, Crowley."

"Me too," the demon snapped. "First of all, I am not the _old _king. I am the _only _king, and I know you've been down a while, but-"

"Come now, Crowley," Adramalech sighed. "You're not a fool. You have little to no control over hell or demon-kind anymore, and you know it. They all know we're here, and they know where a demon's allegiance should truly lie. As should yours."

"So, you really just wanted to threaten me, is that it?" Crowley snapped.

"On the contrary," Adramalech replied. "I just wanted to assure you of something. We know in the past that your allegiance has occasionally lay with the Winchesters, and that you assisted them in the killing of Abbadon, but all this can be forgiven. We could use a demon like you, Crowley. Not only are you quite the salesman, but you are a _survivor_. While we were down in the pit, you made it through the apocalypse and countless other ordeals and came out on top."

"You're quite flattering," Crowley smirked.

Adramalech grinned his yellow grin. "We Knights have no particular quarrel with you. Your assistance in killing Abbadon can be forgiven, since you were only doing so to survive. As long as you join our cause and ally yourself to the right side, the _winning _side, I'll let you walk out of here unharmed. You can go about your life, and we'll call when we need you. Just promise me you follow the Knights now, and you are free to go."

Crowley looked over at the three humans a few feet away, conflicted. Sam was back on his feet, Julie helping him stay upright, and Dean was staring right at Crowley, green eyes begging him not to do this. Not to betray them. Dean, who had been the closest thing to a friend he had found in literally centuries. Dean who, despite all their fighting, really did trust Crowley, at least a little. Could he really betray that man, and Sam and Julie as well?

After a long moment of hesitation, Crowley turned to Adramalech and grinned. "We have a deal, my friend."

"Actually, I would be your lord now," Adramalech corrected, but he was grinning as well.

"Crowley!" Dean yelled angrily as they shook hands. The demon forced himself not to look at the man as he cried, "You're just leaving us? We trusted you, you double-crossing son of a bitch!"

"Take it easy on the girl, would you?" Crowley said quietly to Adramalech. "She hasn't done anything to make me hate her yet."

The three hunters stared at Crowley as he suddenly vanished in his typical demon fashion. Dean was almost blinded by rage. He couldn't believe, after all that he had gone through with that demon, that he would just abandon them to die like this!

"So I guess we _shouldn't_ have let him in yesterday," Julie muttered bitterly. "If he was just going to abandon us…"

"Oh, don't be too upset," Adramalech said condescendingly. "If your friends were all about to tortured to death, and you didn't have to be sentenced to the same fate, would you really be foolish enough to join them?"

"Yes," all three of them growled.

Adramalech shook his head. "Humans. I will never understand them."

"You were human once," Sam pointed out through gritted teeth.

"Huh. I had almost forgotten." Adramalech shrugged. "No matter. I know I should probably get you three to Beelzebub and Asmodeus, but once they get their hands on you, I'll never have any chance to have some fun. What do you say, brave little hunters? Shall we play a game?"

Dean glared at the demon as he held out a knife for Dean. "Come on, Dean Winchester. I'll make you a deal. You beat me right now, and I'll let the girl go. I technically don't even need her, and I must admit, I do like a good gamble every now and then."

After hearing this, Dean didn't hesitate for a second. "Deal. I beat you fair and square in a fight, she walks free and you don't go after her ever again. You got it?"

Adramalech chuckled. "I love it when they play tough. Sure, Dean Winchester. There's no way you will win, anyway."

"Try me," Dean growled, and without another word, Knight of Hell and human launched into a fight.

At first, Dean was holding his own. Dean was fast, strong, a wicked good fighter. But there was that inescapable fact: Adramalech was a Knight of Hell. Within the first minute of sparring, he got a good jab in and sliced Dean's arm. Julie cried out, but Dean kept fighting. He got a good kick in Adramalech's gut while the demon was still gloating, and then he lunged forward to stab the demon in the heart.

Unfortunately for Dean, he overestimated how much his kick had really affected Adramalech. The demon kicked Dean's blade out of his hand and punched Dean in the jaw so hard that Dean stumbled back. While Dean was still stunned, the Knight lunged forward, dropping his blade, and began to punch and kick Dean over and over until he lay on the ground, bloody and weak.

Adramalech raised his arm to punch Dean yet again, and the hunter was too weak to fight back. But Julie shrieked, "Stop it!" and dove in-between them, standing protectively over Dean.

Adramalech stepped back and chuckled. "So sorry, Dean. Looks like you didn't save the girl this time. In fact, I think she just saved you."

Julie knelt and gingerly helped Dean sit up. He had a hard time even seeing through the blood on his face and his swollen black eyes. "You're weaker than I expected," Adramalech said thoughtfully. "Normally the Mark would make you stronger, but…you must not be using the First Blade anymore. Rather foolish of you, I must say. Makes situations like this impossible to escape, really."

"Leave him alone, asshole," Julie snapped.

"I must admit, this girl is growing on me, Dean," the Knight of Hell chuckled. "It'd be a shame if only Beelzebub got to enjoy you…"

Before Julie could reply, Adramalech had suddenly grabbed her and slammed her against a nearby tree. Sam and Dean both cried out, outraged, but neither could help her. Julie glared at Adramalech, breathing heavily, as his greedy eyes roamed over her body.

"You are quite lovely," he sighed, tucking a strand of blond hair behind her ear. Julie bit back about a hundred foul words as he stroked her cheek. "I suppose you're probably one of these boys' girlfriend, aren't you?"

She didn't reply, and he chuckled. "I would guess Dean the way you went to protect him. I'm sure he doesn't like me doing this much, does he?"

Sure enough, Dean yelled, "Leave her alone, you son of a bitch! It's not her you want anyway."

"On the contrary, my dear Dean," Adramalech chuckled. "You and your brother are very handsome men, I'll give you that, but I'd have to say that I definitely want her…"

Adramalech's fingers slowly slid down her neck, lower and lower... "Get away from her!" Sam yelled angrily.

"I swear to god, if you touch her again, I'll-" Dean started to growl.

"You'll what?" the Knight chuckled. "There's nothing you can do to me, Dean Winchester! You're just a weak, pathetic little human without your Blade."

"Maybe it's not him you should be worried about," a low, furious voice growled, and Adramalech whirled around just in time for an angel blade to go straight into his heart.

Julie gaped at Castiel as he stood there, terrifying in all his angelic glory. The angel grabbed her arm and pulled her away from the stunned, wounded Knight as he slowly pulled the blade out of him. He lifted his head, furious, and opened his mouth, but before he could so much as speak, a gunshot went off and a bullet went straight into his forehead.

Sam and Dean turned their heads and stared at the last person they had expected to come to their rescue: Crowley. The demon stood there, still holding up one of the guns which had been stocked with devil's trap bullets. He smirked slightly and called to Adramalech, "Don't bother moving, _my lord_. You're trapped there until we decide to do something with you."

The Knight started to swear angrily at them, until Crowley fired another round into him for good measure, and the Knight just stood there, whimpering in pain.

"Cas," Julie breathed, her mind still reeling by this crazy turn of events. "How did you know to find us?"

Cas nodded towards Crowley. "He contacted me the moment he left here, told me the situation. I'm just glad we weren't too late."

"So…you didn't really abandon us?" Dean asked Crowley slowly as he heaved himself to his feet, trying to ignore how every part of him ached.

"No, in fact I saved your miserable asses, so I would be groveling if I were you," the king of hell snapped. Of course, none of them groveled, but Julie nodded gratefully at him, and Crowley knew that was the best he was going to get.

Castiel moved over to Dean and touched his face for a brief moment. When he moved his hand away, all blood and wounds were gone. "You saved us, man," Dean said gratefully, pulling the angel in for a brief hug.

Crowley cleared his throat, and Dean sighed and added, "And Crowley too." The demon smirked smugly as Cas healed Sam's arm as well, and then the five of them gathered around the Knight, who glowered at them and spat a few swear words until Dean took the machete Crowley was offering him and cut the demon's head clean off.

For a moment, there was silence. Then Sam muttered, "Well. Let's get to work."

* * *

><p>It wasn't even twelve hours later that they finished burying bits of the Knight around the state and returned to the bunker. Sam, Dean, and Julie collapsed into chairs at the grand oak table, exhausted, while Crowley and Castiel stood by, trying to plan their next move.<p>

"With the return of the Knights, the angels are going to have to get to work," Cas said grimly. "We may not be able to kill them, but we can slow them down, do some damage control."

"Almost all of my followers have left me for the _winning side_," Crowley muttered sullenly.

"Oh, boohoo, so you lost your throne," Dean snapped. "We've got bigger problems now, Crowley."

"We've got to let everyone know that the Knights are back," Julie pointed out. "You guys know quite a few hunters. We should let them all know, and they can help spread the word."

The others nodded. "I'll get the angels watching out for any unusual activities," Cas said. "If we notice anything, you'll be the first to know."

"And I'll have those who are truly loyal to me keep an eye out too," Crowley sighed. "I can probably get some spies on the inside, and hopefully get some inside information."

"And all the hunters should be looking out for them as well," Sam added. "It shouldn't be too hard to find them, once we get the system working."

"Finding them won't be the hard part," Cas pointed out. "Killing them will be. We did a good job of dealing with Adramalech, but if another demon finds him and puts him back together, we're back where we're started."

Dean put his head in his hands, feeling like he was filled with lead. All he wanted to do was sleep and put these crazy past forty-eight hours behind him. He wanted to go back to the way things were just a few days ago, where he and Sam and Julie had a good system going. They were happy, they had fun, they saved people and did their work and got to relax every once in a while. But now, those good times were gone, possibly for good. And he knew what he had to do.

"We all know what needs to happen," Dean sighed, sounding a thousand years old. Sam, Julie, and Cas looked at each other, concerned. "Somebody's got to kill them, guys. I'm the only one who can."

"We'll find another way," Julie said gently, touching his shoulder.

"We don't need to!" he said, frustrated. "We've got a surefire way to kill Knights, and we might as well use it."

"Dean, it's not worth it," Sam said firmly.

"Are you even hearing yourself? One person's life isn't worth stopping five of the most dangerous, evil things to walk the planet?"

"First of all, we don't even know if you'd be able to kill all five," Julie pointed out coldly. "I think that is our last resort, if we've tried everything else we can think of and there's just no other way."

"Or we could just let the man use the Blade and end this a lot quicker and a lot less bloody," Crowley said coolly.

Sam and Julie glared at him. "There's no guarantee of that!" Sam snapped protectively. "Sure, if we locate all the Knights and we know that Dean can just walk in and kill them all easily, then use the Blade. But the likelihood of things working out like that is ridiculous."

"I agree with them," Cas said gravely. "It's not worth sending Dean down that path again unless we're certain that he will be able to take care of them once and for all."

Crowley glowered at the three of them for a moment, while Dean sat in his seat, not bothering to voice his opinion. He wasn't even sure he had one. Sure, he wanted to stay himself, to stay happy and human with Julie and Sam. But he also knew that it was his duty to stop evil no matter what the cost to himself. All he really knew right now was that he wanted to sleep and make this all go away, at least for a few short hours.

"Fine," Crowley finally said. "Dean, when you're ready to use the Blade, let me know. Until then, I've got work to do."

The king of hell, or rather the former king turned and walked out of the bunker. The three hunters and angel watched him go. In the silence after his exit, Julie finally said, "We need to make some calls. Dean, Sam, you two go get some sleep. Cas and I can handle this."

"Julie, I can help," Sam protested.

"You two have suffered a lot today," Cas interrupted him. "I may have healed you, but your body needs to heal itself. Go, sleep. We'll be fine."

Sam sighed and gave in, barely making it to his own bed before he collapsed. As for Dean, he got into bed and his exhausted body quickly forced him to sleep. But he had barely even drifted off before the nightmares began.

He was in a dark room, and his vision was literally red with rage. Everything in him was burning with hatred and the urge to kill. He lunged forward and drove an ancient, bone blade, the First Blade into the person in front of him. The sensation was so wonderful, the burning urge in him to kill sated for a moment.

But as the red haze faded and he could see and think clearly, he had to fight the urge to scream. Because the body in front of him, the bloody, mutilated corpse he had murdered…that was his brother. That was _Sam_.

And when Julie came into the bedroom, expecting to see an unconscious Dean sprawled across the bed, she instead saw Dean, face pale and worn, sitting on the edge of the bed and staring at the Mark of Cain seared into the skin of his forearm.

She went to his side and sat down next to him, gently putting an arm around him. "Dean…" she started, but she didn't know what to say or how to help. She remembered when they were first together, she would occasionally notice the Mark bothering him, and she would distract him with kisses or a new case. But this…this was different. The Knights were back, and that Mark would be urging him to go out and kill them as long as they were.

And there was nothing she could do to help.

Neither of them could think of a single thing to say, and so they sat there in silence, holding each other, until finally Dean was so physically exhausted that he slipped into unconsciousness. Julie tucked him in like she would a child and pressed as close as she could to him, trying to ward off the darkness of the Mark, as if her closeness could remind him that he was Dean, a good man, and not whatever the Mark wanted to make him into.

But no matter what she did, Julie could not save Dean. She had been able to before, but now…now this was Dean's battle, and he had to fight it alone.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen**

"I come bearing gifts," Julie announced as she entered the room.

Dean set down the sandwich he was eating and Sam closed the huge, leather-bound book he had been reading. "Please tell me it's food," Dean said.

"Dude, that's your third sandwich in the past hour!" Sam cried.

"The Mark of Cain makes a guy hungry," Dean said wisely.

"That's your excuse for everything. Yesterday after you ate all those burritos you said the Mark of Cain made you gassy."

"You never know, it might have," Dean shrugged.

"Anyway…back to these gifts," Julie said, and they turned their attention to her. "Well, technically it's really more of news, but…"

"Good news?" Dean asked hopefully. "Please, I cannot take any more bad news."

"Any news is good really," Sam pointed out. "It's been two weeks since Adramalech, and nobody's got even a glimpse of a Knight. All we've been doing is sitting around waiting for something to happen and it's killing me."

"Then I have great news!" Julie said, handing them a few sheets she must have printed off the internet. "Boys…I have found us a case."

"Thank god!" they both sighed, reaching for the papers.

"Let's see…we've got three unexplainable deaths in the last year, that's always good," Dean muttered as he flipped through. Both Sam and Julie stared at him, and he quickly added, "Not for those people, though. Obviously."

"Wait. Why are there also articles about two sisters both winning the lottery in here?" Sam asked. "Do you think they're connected?"

"I wouldn't normally, but this is the third time these sisters have won something like this in the past two years," Julie said. "Last year, they won ten thousand dollars on a game show, as well as a _new car_!" Sam smirked at her game show host voice. "And they won thirty thousand dollars in the lottery last year as well, and then this year they won half a million dollars! I just can't believe anybody has this kind of luck, and in a town with unexplained deaths, too…"

"Does sound suspicious," Dean said. "What do you think it is? Sounds like witches to me. God, I hate witches."

"More than you hate being cooped up in here doing nothing?" Julie pointed out, and within the hour, the hunters were packed up and headed on another case.

It was such a relief to be back on a case. They could almost pretend that things were normal, joking around in the long car ride, moaning when Dean started the same album over for the fourth time in a row, stopping for cheap, crappy burgers at a diner and laughing when the cute waitress wouldn't quit making eyes at Sam. Things felt normal, back to the way things had been just a few weeks ago. Before the world was suddenly in danger yet again, and it was up to the Winchesters to step forward again.

Except that they couldn't step forward when they knew practically nothing about the Knights except that they were back. The demons sure knew how to hide themselves; even with all angels, hunters, and quite a few demons on the alert, no one had heard so much as a whisper. And so, Sam, Dean, and Julie had been forced to sit around and wait, which none of them were good at.

A couple days after their encounter with Adramalech, Dean had been able to get the Mark under control once more, and he returned to himself again. Still, Julie and Sam were uneasy. Dean would often walk into the room and they would stop talking abruptly, trying to pretend they hadn't just been discussing him in concerned whispers. Sam was always trying to cheer him up or keep him busy with useless tasks around the bunker, while Julie was treating him like he was made of glass or something. She hovered around him, encouraging him, comforting him, being sweet and loving and caring.

He could not take another minute of it. Dean was not the type of person who could handle being babied. What he wanted was for his brother and his girlfriend to go back to normal. He wanted them to tease him and make fun of him, and he wanted to be able to have an actual argument with someone. Although he had the Mark of Cain under control, he was still a little antsier and grumpier than usual. He wanted to be able to let out some frustration in an argument, but every time he tried to pick a fight, Sam and Julie instantly gave in, agreeing with him so as to avoid conflict, thinking he couldn't handle it. It was driving him insane.

But more than anything, he wanted to be busy. He wanted to work. A case like this was exactly what Dean needed.

_This'll be fun_, he thought as he sped down the highway towards the town that led to the quaint little town of Oakwood, Missouri.

He had no idea how wrong he was about to be.

* * *

><p>"Well, if I had half a million bucks, I would live in a place like this," Dean admitted, staring up at the huge white mansion before them. They had parked the Impala on the street and walked up to the fancy iron gate keeping them off the perfectly manicured lawn.<p>

"Do we knock?" Sam smirked.

Julie rolled her eyes and pressed a small button on one of the posts. After a pause, a voice came through a hidden speaker, "State your name and business."

"Uh, yeah," Dean said nervously. "Um, I'm Dean Powell and I'm here with a couple of my coworkers. We work for a local newspaper, and we were hoping to get an interview with Ms. Summers and Ms.…Summers? We heard they live here."

There was a beat, and then Dean distinctly heard a woman's voice say, "Oh, he's hot!" Before he could even find the small hidden camera she must be seeing him with, the woman said, "Come in, Mr. Powell, come in!"

The gate swung open smoothly, and the three hunters exchanged a look before walking up the stone walkway to the huge house.

Dean hadn't even put his hand out to knock before the door opened, and he found himself staring at a pretty blond woman who looked to be about thirty. Her hair was perfectly curled, spiraling around her face, which was so enhanced with makeup it looked like an airbrushed photo. She wore a slinky white dress, and she dazzled him with the most blindingly white smile he'd ever seen; it almost hurt to look at.

"Come in, come in!" she said brightly. "Welcome to our humble home."

Julie and Sam both snorted, and the woman whipped her head towards them. They gave her their most winning smiles, and she moved on. "I'm Lucille Summers, but you can call me Lucy," she said to all of them, although her eyes were resting on Dean. "Or whatever you like, really," she added, winking at Dean.

His mouth twitched as he tried not to smirk, and Julie smacked his arm when Lucille Summers wasn't looking.

"Who was at the door, Luce?" another woman called, and a woman nearly identical to her came down a fancy flight of stairs. Her eyes were green instead of her sister's blue, and her blond hair was straight instead of curled, but they had similar, picture-perfect faces, and she even wore the same dress, although it was dark red.

The woman stopped at the bottom of the stairs and stared at them, surprised for a moment, before giving another dazzling grin. "Now, what do we have here?"

"Lena, this is…" Lucille Summers stopped and turned to face them. "I'm sorry, I don't recall your names."

"Dean Powell," Dean said, shaking Lena Summers' hand.

"I'm his brother, Sam Powell," Sam said, shaking both of their hands since he hadn't been introduced to either of them yet.

"I'm Julie Andrus," Julie said, moving to shake Lena's hand. The woman just stared at her coolly, so she dropped her hand awkwardly. "We're, uh…we're reporters. We were hoping for an interview about the lucky sisters who won the lottery yet again!"

In an instant, they were happy and bubbly again. "Oh, yes," Lena giggled. "We're just so thrilled!"

"So thrilled," Lucy echoed, beaming at Dean. "Here, Mr. Powell—or should I call you Dean?"

"I…uh, well-"

"Dean it is!" she chirped, linking arms with him and dragging him after her into a fancy parlor. "Well, Dean, you and your friends come in here and we can get started."

Lena latched onto Sam and within a minute, Sam, Dean, and Julie were seated on a couch across from the wealthy, beautiful women. Sam set up a small recorder, and Julie started taking notes as Dean began questioning the women.

"So, you two have been on quite the lucky break lately. What's it like to be about the luckiest people on the planet?"

Both women laughed lightly. "Well, I hardly think it can all be luck," Lena said carefully.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, trying to sound innocently curious.

"I think good things happen to those who deserve them," Lena said smugly, and Lucy nodded in agreement.

"Huh." Dean bit back about a thousand instances he had of terrible things happening to good people and instead asked, "Well then, how do you plan to use all this money?"

"Well, we already bought this house, and that took a decent chunk out of it," Lucy admitted. "But hopefully we'll win another lottery sometime and then we can get a bigger house or some more new cars!"

The sisters laughed, and Sam and Dean joined in weakly. "So, you really think you'll win again?" Dean asked carefully.

"You never know," Lena shrugged, and Julie caught them exchanging a sly glance.

For a while, Sam and Dean went on questioning them, but Julie excused herself to use a bathroom. She went upstairs and dug around in a few closets and rooms with closed doors, looking for something suspicious. But she couldn't find a thing, and by the time she returned, Sam and Dean had run out of questions. Lucy hinted heavily that she wanted Dean's number, but he politely declined, and she soon escorted them out after that.

The three hunters waited until they were in the car to discuss what they had found. "Nothing," Julie muttered. "I couldn't find any evidence."

"They didn't seem like killers," Sam admitted. "Although they were a little suspicious."

"Alright," Dean sighed. "It's getting late. Sammy, why don't we drop Jules back at the motel and we can get some grub?"

"I can just come with you guys," Julie said.

"What you can do is relax," Dean said firmly. "You've barely slept for the past two weeks, and you're always busy doing something. Also, we could use a break from each other," he added in a lower voice.

"What?" she snapped.

"Jules, all you do is worry about me! Why don't you just have an evening to yourself? Just hang out for a while, we'll be back in an hour, tops."

Julie sighed and gave in, not bothering to point out that the reason she barely slept was because she would hold him all night, soothing him when a nightmare came, unable to sleep or do anything but worry over Dean. And of course all she did was worry about him; he needed her!

It was a little nice to get some alone time though. She had spent so much time fretting over Dean she barely got to be alone. Once she got back to the motel, she settled down on the bed to watch some mind-numbing television. Julie tried to remember what she had liked to do in her alone time before Dean and Sam, but Dean, and then later Sam had been her life for a little over a year now. They were a part of her, and although it was nice to be alone, she kind of missed Dean's constant presence near her and Sam, always there to talk to or laugh with when Dean did something stupid of goofy, which he inevitably would.

Damn, she was getting dangerously codependent. She had used to be independent, living her own life, never letting men define her. And now, isn't that what she was doing? Every demon, angel, or monster they came across thought of her as the Winchesters' little girlfriend, just there for sex and moral support. At least until she stabbed the monster.

Things were different with Sam and Dean, Julie decided. They needed someone like her, to hold them together after all they'd gone through. And she was happy like this. This was what she wanted.

Julie sighed and turned off the television. She was supposed to be relaxing, not questioning her life choices! And anyway, Sam and Dean would be here any second and she couldn't be in the middle of an existential crisis when that happened. She got up and found a beer in the mini fridge, probably Dean's but he wouldn't mind her taking it. She took a long swig of beer, relishing the strength of it. Dean sure did like the strong stuff.

As Julie swallowed, something odd happened—her throat seemed to close up. A wave of panic swept over her, and she began choking and coughing, trying to breathe. It felt as though an invisible hand was choking her. She dropped the beer bottle and it shattered at her feet. Julie clutched at the table as she grew increasingly lightheaded, choking and gasping for even a little bit of air.

Finally, she was able to cough hard enough that something cleared in her throat and she got a shallow gasp. Unfortunately, she had just coughed up her own blood. The taste in her mouth made her gag as it dripped warm and wet from her mouth. Julie's vision was growing darker, the room was spinning, she was on all fours now, coughing up more blood…

There was the sound of a key scratching in the doorknob. A moment later, the door opened. Julie barely lifted her head enough to see Dean walking into the room carrying a couple plastic bags, half-turned to talk to Sam.

"Dean…" she choked out, her voice weak and strained.

He whirled around, eyes wide at the pain in her voice. When Dean saw Julie collapsed on the floor, blood dripping from her mouth, barely conscious, he froze for a moment, horrified. The next second he yelled, "Jules!" and rushed to her side, pulling her upright and trying to figure out was wrong.

"Julie? Jules?! What's happening? Oh, god, Sammy…" Dean cried in a panic. Sam had dashed into the room and was now frozen in shock and horror.

All of the sudden, something clicked in Dean's brain. "The witches!" he cried. "Sam, look for a hex bag! Quick!"

Sam started dashing madly around the room, checking in cabinets and under beds and any other place where a hex bag might be hidden. As for Dean, he pushed the hair out of Julie's face and stared at her in panic. She was pale and weak, and he wasn't entirely sure she was still even breathing.

"Julie, stay with me," he begged her. "Come on, just a few more seconds. We'll save you, Jules, just…stay with me, please!" Her eyes fluttered slightly, but she was so weak, and she was fading so fast… "Sam! Hex bag!" Dean cried, so terrified he couldn't even form a full sentence anymore.

"I'm trying, Dean!" Sam cried, sounding just as anguished and terrified. "I just-" He suddenly stopped and stared at the purse sitting by the bed. The purse she had brought with her to the Summers' home.

Sam lunged forward, fumbling for his lighter with one hand as he tore through the purse with the other. He found a small purple cloth tied around some ingredients just as Dean yelled, "Sammy!"

Sam threw the hex bag to the ground and lit it on fire. The thing burned for a few seconds before slowly crumbling to ashes. Sam looked up and saw Dean clutching Julie to his chest. But she wasn't moving.

"Jules?" Dean asked in the smallest, most terrified voice Sam had ever heard him use.

A second later, Julie's eyes suddenly flew open and she took a huge gasp of air before choking on whatever blood still lodged in her throat. Dean wiped the blood away from her mouth as Sam collapsed against the bed, sighing in relief. "Dean…" Julie started, eyes wide and terrified.

"It's okay, honey, I've got you…" Dean said softly, pulling Julie into his chest. They rocked back and forth slowly, Dean stroking Julie's hair and reminding himself over and over that she wasn't dead.

Dean met Sam's eyes and nodded gratefully. Sam nodded back, and the brothers slowly caught their breath along with Julie, trying to ignore how close to losing Julie they had just come.

* * *

><p>Dean slammed the door of the Impala behind him as he started towards the huge mansion before him. Normally he would be at least a little concerned about stealth, knowing almost for certain that the two women inside that house were witches, but they had tried to kill the woman he loved, and that was unforgivable. The moment they were certain Julie really was alright, Sam and Dean had gotten into the Impala and driven off to take care of the witches, after trying and failing to convince Julie to stay behind. And now that they were here…Dean really wanted to put a bullet through their picture-perfect heads.<p>

Sam and Julie followed behind Dean, guns in hand as he found a dip in the fence around the house and launched himself over it. Sam gave Julie a boost over and climbed over himself. They waited for a moment for alarms to go off, but somehow the huge mansion must have a pretty shitty security system.

Dean walked up to the door, prepared to kick it down if necessary, but found it not only unlocked but slightly ajar. For the first time, he was a little concerned about barging in there on two deadly witches. Open, unlocked doors were never a good sign.

One look back at Julie's wide blue eyes and he was ready to go, though. No matter how many bad vibes this house was giving him, practically screaming trap, the fact that these people tried to kill Julie…that was enough for him to push the door wide open and barge in, gun raised.

The house was well-lit, but completely silent. All the servants must have gone home, and the witches were surely in hiding. Dean glanced back to make sure Sam and Julie had him covered before inching into the sitting room Sam and Dean had sat in just a few hours ago.

He immediately lowered his gun and fought back a wave of horror and nausea. Because there were the beautiful Summers sisters, stiff pale corpses sitting up in their plush chairs, eyes completely liquefied into blood, with dried blood coming from their noses, ears, and mouths as well.

Julie groaned and looked away. "Damn," Sam muttered. "Guess we got here too late."

"What do you think happened?" Dean asked, carefully approaching what had once been Lucy Summers. "I've never heard of witches killing themselves doing a spell…"

"I think something else must have done it," Sam said, following Julie's line of vision. She was staring at the spell ingredients on the coffee table before the two dead sisters. It was the kind of hex spells she had come across often, but she had never seen one aimed at her. A black-and-white photo of her that must have been taken by a security camera outside had a red X over her face drawn in blood. It was eerie, and for a moment, she almost felt like her throat was closing up again.

"What do we do?" Julie asked quietly. "This isn't over, I don't think."

"Let's look around," Dean suggested, and the others agreed. Dean looked upstairs, while Sam searched the ground floor, and Julie took the basement.

Julie walked through the lavish house, gun raised and ready to fire. She found only an elegant, glamorous basement nicer than any place she'd ever lived except maybe the grandiose bunker. Still, this place was ridiculous. The fact that people lived in this kind of excess while others starved…it made her furious, but there wasn't much she could do about it.

Julie was about to turn and go back upstairs when she saw a closet door slightly ajar. She edged closer and pushed the door open. It wasn't really a closet, but a smaller, dimly-lit room unlike the rest of the house. She quickly stepped inside and looked around.

This room proved those women had been witches. Weird, shriveled ingredients and even body parts were sitting on shelves, while bottles of blood and other potions sat on another shelf. A small altar was set up in the corner, and Julie moved closer to see what sort of spell was set up on it.

Just as she did, there was a thud, and she turned around to see the door slam shut behind her. Julie ran to the door and tried to move it, but it was sealed shut, and any amount of force she exerted couldn't budge it.

That would have been bad enough, but then the altar burst into flames. Julie whirled around, biting back a scream as blue flames swallowed the black altar and crawled slowly towards her, devouring everything in their wake.

Sam was walking carefully around the corner, past the door to the basement, when he heard someone screaming. He stiffened, and then he was able to make out the words and the voice: Julie screaming, "Help! Sam! Dean! _Help_!"

By the second help he was already dashing downstairs, all caution thrown to the wind. Julie was in trouble, and that was all that mattered. He had almost watched her die earlier, and that would not happen again.

When he reached the lavish basement, he immediately smelled smoke, and heard Julie banging on a closet door. He rushed to the door, but the doorknob was already wicked hot, and the door seemed magically sealed shut anyway. "Julie?" he cried, banging uselessly on the door.

"Sam?" she cried. "Sam, help! There's a fire in here and I can't put it out and I can't get out, Sam! I can't-"

"Calm down," Sam said, trying to get his head on straight. He couldn't save her when he was in a panic. "Julie, you'll be okay. I'll get you out of there, I promise."

"Sam…" she pleaded, and he could practically see her in his mind's eye, trapped against the door as flames advanced on her. He had to be able to save her. He just had to.

"There's no point," a woman's voice said, and Sam whirled around. A woman with long black hair and bright green eyes walked slowly towards him. She was dressed oddly, in a long, flowing black dress, with bangles on her arms and heavy, dark makeup. She was eerily pretty, in an almost unearthly sort of way. She smiled slightly, but it looked odd and forced on her face.

Sam raised his gun, but she only smiled wider. "The infamous Sam Winchester," she sighed. "Always charging into battles gun-blazing, that's you and your brother. Fire that gun, and that pretty little girl will not be able to escape that room until she's nothing but ashes."

Sam hesitated. Julie started coughing inside the closet, choking on smoke he was sure. He couldn't stand at a stalemate like this for too much longer, or she'd die anyway.

"Who are you?" he growled.

"My name is Raven," she said calmly. "I believe you met my apprentices earlier, Lena and Lucille?"

Sam clenched his jaw. "Did you kill them?" he asked in an icy voice.

"Indeed," she sighed. "Such a shame. They had promise, too. Selfish, semi-competent bitches like them make good witches. However, they failed. They were to take care of all three of you, and instead they couldn't even kill the girl. I just did your job for you, really, since you would have killed them anyway."

Sam glared at her. "And you killed those other people, too, then?"

"Those who cross me don't tend to last long, if that's what you're saying," she smirked. "One man cut me off in traffic. He was found dead the next day. Another insulted me on the street, and they found him impaled on a tree. You should learn from that, Sam Winchester, not to cross me."

"I'm not too scared," Sam smirked. "Here, I'll cut you a deal. Let her out of there, let her go, and I might not kill you."

"I think not," Raven said coldly. "I am over two hundred years old, boy. I have trained some of the deadliest witches alive; I _am o_ne of the deadliest witches alive. A foolish human like you cannot touch me-"

She stopped speaking abruptly when a gunshot went off and she fell, a bullet through her heart.

"God, I hate it when they monologue," Dean muttered, lowering his gun.

"Dean!" Sam cried, horrified.

"What?" Dean snapped. "That was the witch killing people!"

"She was the only one who could stop the spell about to kill Julie!" Sam cried, and Dean turned white as a ghost in a second.

The two brothers rushed to the door, Sam crying, "Julie?! Are you okay?"

"Help me, please!" her voice came, weak and panicked.

Dean tried to kick the door down, but he could barely budge it. "Jules, can you get away from the door?" he cried.

"There's fire everywhere, Dean!" she cried back.

"Julie, please, just trust me!" he yelled back, and a moment later she cried, "Okay, I'm clear! But hurry!"

Dean fired a couple rounds into the hinges of the door, weakening it. Sam fired another round for good measure, and on three the two brothers threw all of their weight against the door. It shook violently but didn't give. Without even needing to speak, they immediately did it again. And again. The third time, one of the hinges snapped, and the door opened a small crack. Dean and Sam reached their arms into the smoke-filled, fire-engulfed room, helping pull a weak Julie to safety. She was coughing and choking from the smoke, and her clothes were singed, but she was alive at least.

Sam moved to wrap Julie in his arms, but Dean brushed him aside, thankfully not realizing what his intentions had been. Sam immediately felt guilty. He was not the one who should be holding Julie as she recovered from nearly dying for the second time in two hours. That was Dean's job. Not his.

Dean brushed Julie's sooty curls out of her face and pressed his lips to the top of her head, steadying himself. She was alright, there was still air in her lungs and light in her eyes. God, this was awful, this mind-numbing, life-threatening panic he had felt twice today, the overwhelming fear of losing her. He had been able to successfully ignore the thought of Julie ever really dying until…well, until today, really. But now… with her coming so close twice in one day…

"I hate this damsel in distress thing," Julie muttered after a while, having recovered enough to have her sense of humor back.

Sam laughed lightly, and she sat up on her own and squeezed his hand. "Thank you, Sam," she said gently, looking him in the eyes. "I'd be dead if you and Dean hadn't found me."

Sam felt light and happy. He started to smile back, but then suddenly his face grew dark and he pulled his hand away from Julie. She blinked, confused, but Dean was suddenly pulling her upright. "Come on," he said. "That fire's still coming."

They tried futilely to put out the roaring blue flames, but in the end there was nothing they could do. They fled the house and called the fire department, but in the end, Sam, Dean, and Julie stood watching the Summers' gorgeous mansion slowly go up in flames. And, although they had managed to stop the evil witch, they had to admit, it didn't really feel like they had won. Because no matter how witches they killed or people they saved, there would always be another monster to fight. And the Knights were still out there. This had done nothing to help them stop the evil threat out there.

One thing it had done, however was introduce Sam and Dean to the feeling of what it would be like to lose Julie. Both brothers had lost the other time and time again, and they knew how to cope with, or at least survive the death of the other. But the thought of losing this woman who was still rather new to their lives…that dark thought kept both brothers up all night long…

* * *

><p>Two figures watched from a distance as the last remaining structure of the Summers' mansion finally crumbled. The shorter figure, a portly, middle-aged man grinned at the glowing embers. "Well, my lord?" he asked the other figure. "Did you get what you wanted?"<p>

The other figure thought for a moment. "I must admit, I'm a bit disappointed in Raven," he said in a low, smooth, attractive voice. He himself was an attractive young man, maybe thirty, with sleek dark hair, clever dark eyes, and a handsome face. He wore dark clothes, and it seemed he might just disappear into the inky darkness around him. "That witch has killed countless hunters, and she couldn't even kill that girl with them."

"They _are _the Winchesters, sir," the other man pointed out.

"Please, call me my lord," the younger man chuckled. "Or, rather, my king."

"My apologies, my king," the other man said, groveling now.

"They seem fairly competent," the young man said after a moment. "Certainly worth taking notice of. And the older one, you say he carries the Mark of Cain?"

"He carried the First Blade as well," the older man said, head bowed. "He killed our queen, Abbadon."

"Yes, yes, he killed my treacherous sister, I get it," the other man sighed dramatically. "Frankly, I don't really care what he did to her. What I care about is what he might do to _me_."

"He no longer carries the Blade, my king. You could go follow him right now and kill him yourself; he couldn't kill you."

"Are you certain of that?" the younger man smirked, and his follower hesitated. The leader chuckled. "You demons are quite afraid of him, aren't you? Both of them?"

"They have killed many of us," the demon said quietly. "They defeated Lucifer himself-"

"A fluke," the other man snarled. "No humans could really defeat him. He's just biding his time, until some loyal demon can bring him back."

The demon eyed him nervously. But before he could ask, the young man continued, "For now though, I suppose we should worry about those pesky Winchesters." He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "They seem awfully fond of that pretty little thing with them. I thought they might lose it when Raven's apprentices nearly got her."

"What are you suggesting, my king?" the demon asked almost nervously.

"Nothing, yet," the king sighed. "For now, we'll continue on like we are. I'm in no rush. I'm rather enjoying being back in a real body, on the surface again."

Before his underling could reply, another demon appeared out of nowhere. This demon was possessing a thin, pale little thing, barely over eighteen, with big, wide eyes. She spoke in an icy cold voice, though. "My king, I have a message for you. Your brother, Asmodeus, wishes to see you in hell."

The young, handsome man sighed. "Go on ahead. Both of you. I'll be there in a moment."

Both demons vanished, and the young man stared thoughtfully down at the smoldering house. Suddenly, he smiled slightly. "Go on with your petty little lives, _Winchesters_," he said softly to himself. "I'll be meeting you myself soon enough."

The female demon appeared again and said, "Beelzebub, I'm afraid Asmodeus is quite insistent-" she started.

The young man closed his hand into a fist, and the demon dropped to the ground, choking and spluttering until her insides glowed with a fiery light and she lay dead.

The king of the Knights of Hell shook his head and sighed. "I _said _I would be there in a moment," Beelzebub told her corpse, and with one last look at the burnt house, the Knight vanished into thin air.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen**

Dean blearily opened his eyes as something near his head started buzzing. He turned his head and saw that his phone, which was sitting on the nightstand, was getting a call. He groaned as he pushed himself upright, and Julie, who was sleeping peacefully next to him opened her eyes to stare at him.

He stroked the top of her head with one hand while reaching with the other hand for his phone. "Go back to sleep," he whispered, but she pushed herself upright in the bed as well and shifted closer to him as he answered the phone.

"Hello?" Dean asked curtly in a voice lower and gruffer than normal from sleep.

"Dean Winchester, don't you use that tone with me," a familiar woman's voice smirked, and a smile spread across Dean's face.

"Jody?" he asked, suddenly wide-awake.

"Hey, Dean," his old friend said with a smile in her tone. "It's been too long, kid. How are you?"

"I'm…" Dean stopped to think for a second. "I'm…okay, I guess."

"Because that's not cryptic at all," Jody Mills muttered, and Dean smirked.

He glanced over and saw Julie, hair still mussed from sleep, head cocked as she watched him in confusion. "Who is that?" she mouthed.

"Jody Mills," he mouthed back, and she nodded.

"How are you really, Dean?" Jody asked gently. "I haven't seen you in…wow. A year? Sam told me that you had…well, that you'd gone off the deep edge, and that you two weren't together anymore. But then, I get a call a few months ago from Sam saying you're back, and then you never call even once?"

Dean winced. "Sorry, Jody," he sighed. "Things have been insane. Especially of late. Sam got ahold of you about the Knights, right?"

"Oh yeah," she sighed. "I have to tell you, kid, I'm in way over my head. I just hunt monsters, Dean. I haven't even killed a demon, and now you boys want me looking out for five all-powerful, undefeatable Knights of Hell?"

"Yeah, well…like I said, things have been insane."

"Dean…how are you doing?" she asked in an almost motherly tone. "You know…with the Mark?"

Dean visibly winced, and Julie touched his arm, concerned. He put an arm around her and pulled her closer so she could hear the conversation between Dean and Jody, and so that he could be reminded he wasn't alone. He had her. What was the Mark of Cain when he had Julie and Sammy watching out for him?

"I'm okay, Jody," he told her. "Really. When I gave up the Blade, it went dormant for a while."

"And…is it still dormant?" she asked carefully.

Dean thought about admitting to her that it still bothered him, that on hunts he had to fight the urge to go ballistic, and that when he was pissed, he was on the verge of going on a killing spree. He had to fight the urge to confess the dark, murderous nightmares it brought him now. But he didn't need to worry Jody with that, and he sure as hell thinking the Mark was bothering him more than she already did.

"For the most part," he said offhandedly. "Anyway, that's not important. What about you? How are things with you and Alex…?"

"She's a messed-up teenage girl," Jody sighed. "What do you think?" Dean smirked, feeling sympathetic. He remembered Sam's moody teenage years, which ultimately ended in him abandoning both brother and father for college and a chance at normalcy. "But that's not actually what I'm calling about," Jody added.

"So you don't really want to catch up then, I see how it is," Dean smirked. "What's up, Jody? Got a case? Need some help?

"Actually…" Jody laughed a little uncertainly. "How close are you to Blue Rapids, Kansas?"

"Not far at all, actually," Dean said. "Why do you ask?"

"Well…lately monsters have been getting a lot cockier, if you haven't noticed," Jody said.

"Oh, we've noticed," Dean sighed. "In the past two weeks we've had five separate cases. What I wouldn't give for just one day to stay home and relax!"

"Well, sorry, Dean, but no relaxing today," she said. "I've got a pretty weird case, even for you boys, I'd say."

"Oh really?" Dean smirked, not really believing her.

"Yeah," Jody Mills said. "As of two days ago, in Blue Rapids, Kansas, two people have risen from the dead."

* * *

><p>Jody stood leaning against the black truck that she was driving nowadays as a familiar engine revved. And sure enough, a familiar black Impala sped into the parking lot, making a sharp corner to park almost perfectly next to her car. She shook her head at the man in the driver's seat who was grinning cockily.<p>

"As a police officer, I could arrest you for that show of illegal driving right there," she said as Dean Winchester got out of the car.

"Come here, Jody," he grinned, pulling her into a hug. "You know you love me."

She rolled her eyes, but it was true. She was extremely fond of this deadly hunter, and that ridiculously tall, floppy-haired brother of his who was getting out of the passenger's seat.

She hugged Sam too, smiling fondly up at the Winchester's. But before she could say anything, a third person got out of the car, and Jody stared in disbelief. A pretty woman with shoulder-length blond curls and big blue eyes got out of Dean's car and came to stand next to him. She was one of those naturally beautiful women who could get up and brush their hair and go out into the world and still have guys chasing them. She wore a button-down, checkered red-and-black plaid shirt and tight-fitting, dark jeans. Jody had to admit, she looked good with the plaid-wearing, jean-clad Winchester's. Like she belonged there.

Dean glanced in-between the short-haired, middle aged, brunette cop to his girlfriend. "Oh, right. You wouldn't know…Jody, this is my girlfriend, Julie Carters. Jules…this is our good friend Sheriff Jody Mills."

"They've mentioned you a few times before. It's nice to finally meet you," Julie said with a nice smile, sticking out her hand. Jody shook it and gave Dean an approving look after Julie's firm handshake.

"Funny how these boys completely forgot to mention they finally had a woman around to look out for them," Jody said, shooting them a look. The brothers smiled sheepishly, and she softened.

"So…how did this happen, then?" Jody asked carefully, looking in-between Julie Carters and Dean Winchester, trying to imagine how a tough, flirty, one-night-stand type of guy like Dean could get a girl like her.

"Well, while I was…a little more screwed up than usual…I met Julie," Dean explained. "She helped me put myself back together, and I fell for her, and then…"

"Sam came back?" Jody guessed, smiling slightly. She knew those brothers couldn't stay apart for long.

Sam and Dean both looked down. "No, actually…Julie and I lived together for about four months or so before Sam came back."

"So…you were back to normal, and you two still didn't…?" Jody stopped, realizing how sensitive of a subject this must be. "You know what, it doesn't matter. What matters is you boys are back together, and I need your help."

"Right, the case," Sam said, eager to move on and not think about how he had abandoned his brother, no matter how good the reason. "So, Dean says that apparently people are rising from the dead?"

"It's not unheard of, obviously," Jody shrugged. "You two are great examples of how it is very, very possible to just keep coming back again and again…"

Dean smirked. "So, what do you think did it? Angels? Or maybe demons, in exchange for some souls?"

"Well, whatever it is, they're up to no good," Jody said. "I've got two eyewitnesses who say they saw two people who had been dead for weeks walk out of a graveyard. Normally, I would think they were crazy, especially since it was a couple drunk college guys jacking around, but they got it on video."

"What makes you so sure they're evil though?" Sam asked, confused.

"I'm not absolutely certain, but that exact same night, a couple guys from a local firm both vanished. It could be a coincidence…"

"But when is it ever?" Dean sighed. "Alright, Jody. You've got me convinced. Let's go talk to these guys who saw them come out of the cemetery."

"Any ideas where they'd be?" Julie asked.

"Jake's Bar," Jody said confidently. "It's a couple blocks south of here. They're always there. _Always."_

So the four hunters started walking to the bar. Jody began to question Julie about her past, how she had gotten into hunting, what her family was like, and what living with the Winchester's was like. By the time they reached Jake's Bar, the two women were already laughing and chatting like old friends.

Julie stepped inside the bar first, followed by Sam. Jody put an arm out to stop Dean as he tried to walk in, and she said quietly, "You picked a good girl, Dean."

He smiled slightly after her. "Yeah, I know."

"You love her." It wasn't a question. She had barely seen them interact, except for one moment as they were walking, when Julie turned to ask Dean a question, and Jody had seen the way his face softened and his eyes lit up a little just looking at her. She had seen the way they brushed casually against each other, as comfortable with each other as two people could be. And she knew. She knew Dean Winchester loved this woman.

"I do," Dean said quietly after a moment.

"Good for you, kid," Jody said, patting his arm. "I'm glad she makes you happy. You deserve to be happy."

"Thanks, Jody," Dean said, smiling fondly at her. She gave him a one-armed hug, and he hugged her back before they walked into the dimly lit bar.

Already, a couple sleazy college guys had spotted Julie as she looked around the bar for the two eyewitnesses they were meeting there. The braver one took another shot of whatever he was drinking and approached her.

"Hey there," he said, smirking in a way he probably thought was hot, but immediately made Julie dislike him. The kind of smirk a guy wore when he thought he was God's gift to women, and that she would be lucky to hook up with him. "You look a little lost. Can I buy you a drink?"

Before Julie could even reply, a muscular arm went around her shoulders. "Sorry, pal," Sam said in a falsely friendly tone, his eyes deadly. "She's taken."

Julie blinked, surprised, and then gave the guy an apologetic smile. "Sorry, you heard the man," she shrugged, and he gave six-four, buff, handsome Sam one look and quickly backed off.

Both of them laughed a little once he was gone, and Sam pulled his arm away. "Sorry 'bout that," he said, sounding a little sheepish.

"No, thank you!" Julie said. "God, guys like that kill me. You just saved me a lot of trouble."

"Well then, good," Sam smirked, and the two of them laughed again as they walked over to where Dean and Jody had been watching them.

Jody stared at Sam and Julie for a moment, and the ease and comfort with which they interacted. Julie's arm brushed against Sam's and she didn't even notice, she was so comfortable with him. Sam noticed though, and he stiffened slightly, his face automatically going blank as he tried to suppress an unwanted emotion.

Concern sparked in Jody for a moment, but she quickly pushed it away. She was reading too much into everything. Instead, she pointed out a skinny, floppy-haired guy of about twenty-one with nerdy glasses and a short, stocky, sandy-haired guy of the same age in a dark corner of the bar, talking in low tones. "That's them," Jody said. "Keith Stone and Andy Michaelson."

The four of them ordered beers and went over to join the young men in their large booth. "Hey, boys," Jody said in a cool voice as they reached the booth.

The guys looked up and blinked. "Uh, hey, officer," the sandy-haired one said nervously. "What's up?"

"I've got some friends of mine who are interested in hearing what you saw two days ago." She jerked her head towards Sam, Dean, and Julie.

The nerdy-looking guy gulped nervously. "Are they cops too?"

"We're off-duty right now," Sam said in his friendly voice that people automatically trusted. "We're honestly just curious. It sounds like quite the case."

"Mind if we ask you a few questions?" Julie added with a winning smile, and they two guys exchanged looks.

"Sure!" they both said after a moment, eyes on Julie.

The four hunters squeezed in with the two college guys, Jody being forced to sit next to the nerdier of the two guys, while Julie sat next to the blond. "Thanks for agreeing to talk with us," Julie said, smiling sweetly at them. "Since we're off-duty, I'm Julie."

The guys smiled. "I'm Andy," the floppy-haired guy said a little shyly.

"Keith," the other guy said more confidently.

"Dean, and this is my brother, Sam," Dean finished. "So, what can you guys tell us about what you saw that night?"

The two guys exchanged looks. "Well…we saw Jacob Hendrickson," Andy said after a moment. "And his wife, Sarah or something?"

"Clara," Keith corrected. "Remember, she died right after him."

"And you said…you said these people were dead?" Dean asked skeptically.

"_Were_, yeah," Keith said darkly. "Jacob Samuels died in a car crash last month, and then his wife committed suicide. Everybody knew they were dead, but they just walked out of the graveyard, I swear."

"We've got it on video!" Andy tried triumphantly. "We took it to the cops, but they thought it was fake, so they ignored us."

"Can we see this video?" Sam asked.

"Well…" The college guys exchanged looks. "They took it from us. But she was able to talk to one of the officers and watch it," Andy said, nodding towards Jody.

"It looked real to me, guys," Jody said.

"What did they do?" Julie asked. "These people, when they came out of the graveyard. Did they say anything?"

"No," Keith said. "We…we actually panicked and hid when we saw them. We thought they were…well, we thought they were cops."

"So they didn't know you were there?" Dean asked.

"I don't think so," Keith said.

The hunters asked a few more questions, but it was clear the guys actually knew very little. They soon left the bar, and they walked back to the privacy of their cars before talking about what they had heard. "You believe them?" Sam asked Jody.

"They've got no reason to lie," she shrugged. "And that video was real."

Julie and Dean nodded. "Well, guys," Dean said after a moment. "It looks like we've got some work to do."

* * *

><p>Several hours later, the four hunters arrived at the very same graveyard where Keith and Andy had seen the three dead people walking. They had gone to the firm of the two missing men, but they had not been able to find a single clue or reason that anyone would want to harm the two victims. It was most likely that those guys had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time, if this really was a monster problem. Now that night had fallen, Sam, Dean, Julie, and Jody had decided to go straight to the source, decked out with machetes, silver knives, guns, and any other weapons they could possibly need.<p>

Although they had been unable to find any answers that afternoon, they had gotten a lot of catching up done. Dean and Jody had caught up on all the things they had missed in the past year of each other's lives, and Julie and Jody were really hitting it off. They were both strong-willed, independent, caring women who were deeply protective of Sam and Dean, and Dean could see them quickly becoming close friends as they continued to work the occasional case together.

However, Jody had noticed something else as the afternoon wore on. While Sam and Dean were back to their close brotherly relationship, something was different. It didn't take Jody long to realize that it was Julie. Whenever Sam said something funny, his eyes flicked to Julie, and he would look gratified at whatever smirk or laugh he got out of here. They were obviously extremely close, gravitating towards each other almost constantly, joking and talking and just standing near each other at all times. If Jody didn't know better, and if Dean and Julie didn't occasionally share some sort of intimate moment every once in a while, she would probably assume that Julie was with Sam and not Dean.

Jody was quick and sharp, and she knew the boys well. She could see how much Dean loved Julie, and it seemed like Julie really loved him. But she also caught every longing glance or carefully controlled expression from Sam, and she had a sinking feeling that there was something going on between the three of them that not even they realized.

But they had bigger problems than complicated relationships right now, like whatever monster might be lurking in the graveyard. The four hunters moved carefully through the rows of headstones, weapons at the ready, but they found nothing more than a few mice and bugs around the cemetery. However, after about ten minutes of searching, Sam discovered an old, forgotten crypt in a far corner of the cemetery. The sort of place monsters loved to hole down in.

Dean and Sam went first into the crypt, with Julie and Jody following behind them. The two brothers turned on flashlights and held them so they could also have their guns at the ready. They shined the shafts of light around the tomb until Dean's landed on a shivering figure.

"Over here!" Dean cried, and he and Sam rushed to the hunched figure. They helped the man to his feet, and Jody stared at his pale face.

"That's one of the men who went missing," she told them.

"Help me," the man half-sobbed. "Please…Mason and I…they were going to kill us!"

"Calm down!" Sam told the man. "Where's the other guy? Mason, you said?"

Another man rose out of the shadows and stumbled over to them. "Get us out of here," he said in a hoarse voice. "Quick, before they get back!"

"Okay, okay," Dean said, trying to calm the panicked men while searching the shadows for a monster. "What—I mean who did this to you? What happened? Did you see who took you?"

As Dean questioned the men, and Jody and Sam pointed their guns into the shadows, tensed and ready for a fight, Julie noticed a coffin in the corner that was cracked slightly open. She inched closer to it and peered inside. Immediately, her stomach lurched as she not only saw a fresh corpse inside, but recognized the face as well. It was one of the men standing right there, mere inches away from Dean.

"Dean!" she yelled suddenly, turning around and drawing her machete. "They're not human!"

It only took Dean a second to process what she said and go for his machete, but the larger man, or rather monster was faster still. He lunged for Dean, but Sam fired a bullet into his chest and the monster stumbled back, momentarily stunned.

In the next second, the other man had lunged forward and sank his teeth into Sam's shoulder. Sam cried out in pain as the monster, which Julie realized now must be a ghoul, bit down harder on him. Jody pulled out her own machete and moved to help Dean fight off the other ghoul, while Julie leaped forward and plunged her machete into the back of the ghoul attacking Sam.

It howled in agony and released Sam, who struggled to stay on his feet. Julie withdrew her machete from the monster and in one quick swipe, she beheaded the monster, effectively killing it. Meanwhile, Julie was able to distract the other ghoul long enough for Dean to swing his machete and take the monster's head clean off his shoulder.

For a moment, the crypt was silent other than the four of them catching their breath. Then Julie rushed to Sam and peeled off his jacket to get a better look at his shoulder. It was bloody, but not very mangled. The ghoul hadn't been able to do much damage before she killed it.

"Ghouls," Dean muttered sullenly, lifting the lid off of another coffin to reveal the corpse of the other man the ghouls had been pretending to be. "I can't believe we didn't figure that out."

Jody stared sadly at the face of the corpse in the coffin, white in death. "I wish could have helped them," she said quietly.

"You can't save everyone," Dean said in a low voice, and there was a lot of guilt and grief in those four words.

Julie looked up from Sam, who she had been fretting over, when she heard those words. It broke her heart, the pain Dean had suffered and the amount of people he had cared about and been unable to save. Sam glanced over at his brother as well, trying and failing not to think of Mom and Dad and Jess and Bobby and all those people they couldn't save…

And it wasn't just them, either. Jody had lost her husband and child, unable to save either of them. And Julie had lost her father and mother to the monsters in the dark, and she was constantly in danger of losing Sam or Dean or herself as well. It was an impossible fact to accept, but it was true: not everyone could be saved.

"Come on," Julie said after a moment. "Let's get out of here."

And the four of them left the crypt, continuing on in their foolish attempt to try and outrun all the grief and guilt of their dark pasts.

* * *

><p>The four hunters cleaned up their mess, called the cops and alerted them to the dead bodies, and left the cemetery. Sam, Dean, and Julie offered to have Jody drive the hour or so with them to the bunker to spend the night, but she already had a room in a motel in Blue Rapids.<p>

Julie patched up Sam's shoulder, worrying over him as Jody and Dean looked on. Jody thought long and hard on how to say what she was thinking, until she finally just blurted out in a low voice only Dean could hear, "Dean…can I just say something?"

"Shoot," he said.

"Do you…have you ever…?" She stopped for a moment to organize her thoughts. "Sam and Julie are pretty close, don't you think?"

Dean glanced over at them. Sam was wearing only a thin t-shirt, one sleeve pushed up so that she could finish wiping his shoulder clean and wrapping it in a white bandage. As she patched him up, Sam muttered something, smirking slightly, and Julie laughed. Sam smiled to himself at the sound of her laugh.

"Sure, I guess," Dean said, trying to ignore that stupid, ugly emotion that reared its head whenever Sam and Julie interacted like this. "Why?"

"Well, I just…I don't want to say anything I shouldn't, because I've known Julie for only a day, but…" Jody swallowed. "Dean, do you think there's something going on between them?"

"What? No!" Dean snapped, and Julie and Sam both looked up. He waved for them to go back to what they were doing and hissed at Jody, "Why the hell would you say that?!"

"Look, Dean, I…I just think they seem almost _too _close, you know?" Jody said carefully. "And, you know…Sam's a great guy, and good-looking, too, and Julie seem wonderful, and she's beautiful, and I just…I could see something happening between them, is all I'm saying."

"Well, nothing's going to," Dean snapped defensively. "Nothing is going on there, and nothing will be, because neither of them would ever do that to me. Come on, Jody, you know Sam! You know he'd never do that!"

"I know, I know, I just…" Jody looked up at Dean sadly. "I don't want you getting hurt."

Dean glowered at her. "Please, don't be upset with me, Dean," she pleaded. "You're right, that was stupid and over the line. I'm wrong, I'm just being silly. Overprotective, I guess. I don't want to see you get hurt is all."

Dean softened slightly. "I guess. I…I'm sorry," he added after a moment.

"Don't be," she sighed. "I'm the one who should be sorry. And I should probably get going. You three should, too."

Dean nodded and said goodbye to Jody. The four of them promised to meet up again, and soon, hopefully under better circumstances. Within an hour or so, Sam, Dean, and Julie were back at the bunker. Sam soon went to bed, but Dean's head was too full of conflicting emotions and wild thoughts to sleep.

He went into his and Julie's room and sat down on the edge of their bed. Julie followed him and shut the door behind her. She leaned against the door as she stared at Dean. Something was obviously bothering him; that much was clear from his furrowed brow and dark expression.

"What's wrong?" Julie asked Dean after a long moment, and he looked up. She stood there, the same beautiful girl he had once saved from a demon all those long months ago. Except then, there had been confusion and awe and even a little fear when she looked at him. Now there was concern, and tenderness, and love. She loved him. It was so clear, even in the way she looked at him, and that fact washed away all his doubts. She loved him. He knew that.

Dean shook his head slightly and sighed. "Nothing. I'm fine."

"No, you're not," Julie said in a matter-of-fact tone. "You haven't been since long before I met you. And you definitely haven't been since the Knights came back." Dean stared up at her. He had never said even once how much the Mark of Cain had been bothering him. In fact, he had tried to hide it, but Sam and Julie just knew. They could tell when he was hurting, and they would do anything to help him.

Two people who loved him like that would never betray him like everyone seemed to expect them to. They cared too much to do that to him.

"Look," Julie sighed, walking over to Dean. "You don't have to tell me what's wrong. But please, Dean, let me help you. I hate seeing you like this."

She touched the side of his face gently, and he smiled slightly. "Jules, really. I'm okay." She stared at him in disbelief, and he smiled wider. "I've got you."

Julie smiled slightly and leaned down until their lips met. Dean put his arms around her waist as he kissed Julie for a long moment. He pulled her down on the bed next to him and kissed her again. They sat on the bed, kissing, until Julie pulled Dean's shirt up over his head and started to kiss his jaw, his ear, his neck, his shoulder, all the while running her hands over his shoulder blades and the muscles in his back.

Finally, Dean couldn't take it anymore, and he pushed her gently onto her back and unbuttoned her shirt. Julie lay still, trying to catch her breath and ignore how Dean was getting her heart racing.

"You seem happier now," Julie smirked after a moment, still slightly out of breath.

"Like I said," Dean replied, smiling down at her. He kissed her again for a moment and whispered, "I've got you."


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen**

Julie sighed contently, living in the peaceful space between consciousness and sleep. She was warm and comfortable, the silk sheets soft on her bare skin. She sighed again as a strong, muscular arm went around her waist, and a pair of lips brushed against the back of her neck.

She rolled over and kissed him full on the mouth. He parted his lips, and she traced them with her tongue tantalizingly. One of her hands moved to cup his face, while the other ran through his hair.

When Julie pulled away for a moment to get some air, she opened her beautiful blue eyes and smiled at him. "I love you, Sam," she whispered.

Sam's heart leapt. He had been aching to hear those words for so long. He had tried to ignore it for weeks, but it was undeniable, his attraction for this woman. She was so sweet, so brave, so funny and tough and good and clever and beautiful. How could he not love her?

Sam trailed his fingers down her neck and along her spine. "I never want this to end," he said softly, almost wanting to laugh at how sappy he sounded right now.

"So…it doesn't have to," Julie replied, resting a hand on his bare chest. Wherever she touched him, he felt warmth spread through him. This was so perfect, the two of them like this. Happy and together and in love. This was how things were supposed to be, and nothing could ever ruin how perfect this moment was.

And then someone knocked on the door.

"Sam?" his voice called through the door. No other voice could bring him down from this high, make him feel so dirty and guilty with one word. "You in there?" his brother asked.

Julie stared at Sam, panicked and guilty. "Sammy, I can't find Jules!" Dean yelled, banging on Dean's door.

"Just a minute!" Sam called, and the knocking stopped.

"Oh no," Julie whispered, sitting up in bed and wrapping a sheet around her. "Oh no, no, no."

"Julie…" Sam started, unsure what he was going to say next. Stay with me? Forget about Dean? Both sounded terribly selfish.

"He can't know," Julie whispered.

"Shouldn't we tell him-?" Sam tried to ask.

"No!" she hissed. "It'll break his heart. We can't do that to him!"

"He'll have to find out eventually," he pointed out.

"I've got to go," Julie whispered, wide-eyed.

"No, wait!" Sam reached out and grabbed her arm. "Julie, wait. Don't go. Not yet."

"I have to!"

"But, Julie, I love-"

"But Dean!" She pulled her arm free and started to leave him.

"Julie, wait! Don't leave me!" Sam called after her, reaching out for her, but she was gone, just out of reach, and he couldn't touch her or kiss her or tell her he loved her, he couldn't have her—

Sam jolted up on the couch, his heart beating wildly. His stomach was churning, and he felt sick.

But more than anything, he felt guilty. How could he? How could he have dreams like that, how could he want Julie when she was Dean's? When she loved his brother, and he loved her, and she made him so happy? He loved Dean, and to want to take away that happiness…what kind of a person did that make Sam?

Sam put his head in his hands and groaned. It had just been getting worse. It used to be a stupid, passing thought he would occasionally have, when Julie would suddenly look so beautiful to him and he would ache to touch her. That he could ignore, but they kept getting closer and closer, becoming best friends, spending all day, every day together, and despite all of his willpower, it had happened.

He had fallen for his brother's girl. He was the biggest asshole there was. No one could despise Sam more than he did, but it didn't change the fact that every time Sam saw Julie without Dean, he wanted to hold her and kiss her and have her, and whenever he saw her with Dean, he wanted Dean to be gone.

_Asshole_, Sam thought angrily. _You're a sick bastard, Sam Winchester._

But as much as he hated himself for it, he couldn't change his feelings.

Sam heaved himself off of the couch, a monumental effort with him so upset, and went into the kitchen to make coffee. He did what the Winchester's did best: shut down his emotions and just focused on the task at hand. He poured himself a cup of coffee and leaned against the counter, sipping his coffee, and trying not to think.

And then, because the universe obviously despised him as much as he did himself, a half-asleep Julie walked into the kitchen, her blond curls adorably mussed from sleep, wearing only an oversized, red button-down shirt that was obviously Dean's. She looked up and blinked, startled. "Oh. Hey, Sam. I didn't realize you were up."

"Uh. Yeah, I, uh…I get up pretty early," Sam said lamely, trying to look anywhere but at her long, bare legs.

"I see," Julie smirked, pushing her hair out of her face. "Coffee me?" she asked.

"Sure," he replied, getting out a mug and pouring her a cup. Julie was so comfortable around him, even in nothing but his brother's shirt that he couldn't help but relax a little and slip back into their easy relationship. If the two of them didn't get along that well, or had little in common, Sam knew that he wouldn't have fallen for her, even though she was beautiful. But he and Julie had so much in common, and they had a great relationship. They could sit and read in the same room without speaking for hours and be perfectly content. They could talk and laugh for hours and it would never be awkward. They could tease the crap out of Dean, and Sam loved it. He loved spending with Julie, loved her sense of humor and her sweet, sensitive side, and he loved…

Sam shut down his brain as he reached that dangerous thought. He quickly handed Julie her mug. Her arm brushed his as she took the mug, and he gritted his teeth. It was ridiculous how an accidental touch like that could send his heart racing, and it was _wrong._

"Mm." Julie took another sip of the coffee. "This is good. How come I've never had your coffee?"

"You sleep late," he shrugged. She moved to stand next to him, leaning against the counter as well, and he was again distracted by her bare legs. He cleared his throat and asked, "So, um…you planning on getting dressed?"

Julie looked down and blushed. "Oh, right. Crap. I forgot."

Sam couldn't help it; he smiled slightly. She had forgotten she was wearing practically nothing, she was so comfortable with Sam. If she had been with Dean, she wouldn't have forgotten. She would have felt pressured to be sexy for him, but with Sam she could be herself…

_Stop it!_ Sam thought angrily at himself. _This isn't right. _He had to stop thinking like this!

"Have you seen Dean?" Julie asked, snapping Sam out of his thoughts. "He wasn't in bed when I woke up."

"Haven't seen him. But I haven't been up long. He's around here somewhere, I'm sure."

Sure enough, within a couple seconds, Dean came around the corner into the kitchen, hanging up his phone. He saw Julie first and smirked. "Nice outfit."

She rolled her eyes as she walked over to him. "Shut up," she muttered, and he chuckled and put an arm around her waist, pulling her close to him so he could stick his tongue in her mouth right in front of Sam. Sam worked his jaw furiously in an attempt not to snap at Dean to cut it out, and he looked away.

After a long, agonizing moment, Dean and Julie pulled apart, and Julie asked, "What was that call about?"

"It was Matthew Bones-you guys remember him?" Dean said. "He worked that haunting in Florida a couple months ago with us?"

"Yeah," Sam and Julie both said in unison. "What did he want?"

"Well, he's got word of a case, but he's too busy to take it, so he called up—who else? The Winchester's." Julie smiled a little when she realized he was including her in that blanket term.

"What's the case?" Sam asked.

"Within the past month, three separate people who were in a seemingly happy relationship suddenly killed their partner for someone else," Dean explained. "I would think nothing of it, except that they happened so close in time in a pretty small town where the likelihood of it happening is almost ridiculously low."

"Sounds worth checking out," Julie said.

"You should probably go get dressed then," Dean pointed out.

"We both know you don't really want me to," Julie smirked even as she walked away to the bedroom to get dressed.

Dean shook his head, grinning, as he watched her go. "She's something else, Sammy…" he sighed.

"Yeah, she is…" Sam said softly, and the two brothers watched Julie walk away with matching expressions of fondness and longing.

* * *

><p>"So, officer, you say Mrs. Kim just up and killed her husband two days ago for her coworker?" Dean asked skeptically.<p>

"Yes," the older, heavier, moustache-sporting police officer sighed grimly. "And the Kim's were the nicest couple you could know…good Christian folks and everything!"

Dean swallowed and shot a glance at his brother who stood nearby, looking around the small home of Mr. and Mrs. Kim. Sam was eying a crucifix over the door, but at the officer's words, he glanced over and Sam and Dean had one of their mental conversations.

This was the third couple they had investigated today and the second officer they'd spoken to. Every time it was the same; they were nice enough people who loved each other, or so it seemed, and it seemed completely out of character to murder their spouse or partner. The first couple they had investigated had been a couple of college kids who had been high school sweethearts, and all their friends had expected that they would get married. At least until the guy, a Joey Johnson had beat his girlfriend to death and promptly tried to hook up with her best friend.

The other couple had been in their mid-twenties, and though they'd only been together a few months, they seemed to love each other a lot. Rumor had it that the woman, Jessie's ex was back in town and trying to get back with her, and then her boyfriend had been found stabbed with a steak knife. Many people would have suspected the ex, but Jessie had admitted in tears that she had done it, and she had no reason why. She couldn't help it, she had told the police before they arrested her.

This definitely seemed like a case. But the cops didn't know anything, and Sam, Dean, and Julie hadn't found any leads as they pretended to be state officers looking into the murders.

"Thank you, officer," Dean sighed. "You've been a lot of help. We'll look around some more, if that's alright."

The officer nodded and wandered off to make a call or eat a donut, whatever small town cops did. Sam and Dean walked into the room where Mr. Kim had been found, killed by the shotgun they kept hidden in the closet.

Sam stiffened as they entered the room and saw Julie crouched down, studying the blood and the tape outline on the floor. Her back was to them, and her shirt had slid up enough to reveal a couple inches of bare skin. As much as Sam tried not to look, he couldn't help himself. He noticed the tattoo on her lower back, the same anti-possession tattoo he himself had on his chest. He had never known that was there. Dean did of course. He probably saw it every night as he ran his hands over her and screwed his gorgeous girlfriend every single night…

"Dammit," Sam muttered, hating himself for being unable to control his thoughts. However, Dean heard him and asked, "What?"

"Nothing, sorry," Sam said quickly. "Just…frustrated we haven't found any leads."

"Never say never," Julie said, straightening up and turning to face them. "I found these pictures on the nightstand." She held out a couple photos of a smiling, Asian couple in their mid-thirties, arm in arm outside a fancy restaurant. "I asked one of the officers, and he was actually pretty close friends with Mr. Kim before…well, you know. Anyway, three days ago was their anniversary. They went to this nice, romantic restaurant in town, and then that night, apparently Mrs. Kim killed her husband, even though everyone who saw them said they looked so happy."

"Huh," Dean said, taking one of the photos. "Hang on. D'Angelo's? Isn't that the last place that Jessie chick and her boyfriend were seen before she killed him?"

"You're right…" Sam said slowly.

"And how much you wanna bet those college kids went there, and then one brutally killed the other?" Dean said, looking oddly excited. There was something about these _aha! _moments in a case that got him excited, even as he talked about people murdering each other.

"You think it's all tied to this restaurant?" Sam asked.

"It's possible," Julie admitted. "What do you guys say? Should we go get some Italian food, kill some sons of bitches and be home by midnight?"

"No!" Dean said with surprising conviction. "You're not going."

"What?" she snapped.

"Jules, three couples have gone into that place and promptly murdered each other. I'm not having the two of us go in there so then you can try to kill me!"

"I would never-" Julie started, appalled.

"You wouldn't want to, but I doubt these other folks did either," Dean pointed out. "Whatever's doing this will probably be able to control us as easily as them."

Julie couldn't think of a valid argument, so she sighed and gave in. Sam pointed out there was no point in going until they knew what this was and how to kill it, so the hunters returned to the motel room for some good old research.

Within a few hours, Sam came across a hit, the first one they actually found believable. And even then it was pretty unbelievable.

"You think Aphrodite, the goddess of love is making happy couples murder each other?" Dean asked skeptically.

"I know it's a bit of a stretch, but I've been looking at that restaurant's website, and it's got so many things that are tied to pagan gods in it, and there are so many symbols pointing to Aphrodite it'd be stupid not to ignore it," Sam explained. "Look at the paintings on the wall. Doves, roses, horses, mirrors, sparrows, swans…these are all symbols sacred to her. The place even is constructed like an ancient Greek temple a bit."

"That might just be to attract tourists," Dean pointed out.

"Okay, look at this," Sam continued, going to another page of the website. There's a special room you can pay extra for, a private, romantic room. The walls are literally murals out of Greek mythology praising Aphrodite. And the woman who owns the place, Cythera D'Angelo? Well, Cytherea, which is pretty damn close, is another name for Aphrodite."

"Damn," Julie smirked. "This guy really does his homework."

"I bet he already knew all that before this," Dean muttered. "Well, it sounds like you may be right. Do we know how to kill her?"

"Typical stake through the heart bit," Sam said. "I've got the list of things we have to do to bless it right here."

"Somebody came prepared," Julie laughed, bumping Sam lightly with her shoulder. He smiled, proud. She was impressed with him. Nothing felt better than impressing her.

"But that doesn't explain why she's doing this," Dean pointed out.

"Think about it," Julie said thoughtfully. "These couples…they all killed their partners so they could be with someone else, right? So…they were acting out of love in a really twisted sort of way, right? Maybe she's just magnifying their love for someone they're not really with until they are willing to kill their partner to be with that other person."

"Could be," Dean admitted. "Another reason you are not going with me then. I am not going to have you killing me to be with somebody else."

And of course Sam didn't want Dean to die. That was the last thing he would ever want! But the thought of Julie going to kill Aphrodite and realizing in the meantime that she actually loved Sam, too…that sounded really good to him. Too good. God, he was awful.

"She shouldn't go," Sam said firmly. "Dean, you and I can handle this."

"I'm coming, too, even if I'm just there for backup," Julie snapped. "I'm not some housewife you boys can leave at home."

"I know, I know," Dean sighed. "That's part of why I love you." He kissed the top of her head quickly before going to work preparing stakes to kill the goddess of love.

Sam shook his head. He had just told Julie in such an off-hand sort of way that he loved her, and then he had barely even brushed the top of her head with his lips before moving on. Sam would not ever be that casual with his affection for Julie if he ever got to show it. Dean didn't even know how lucky he was!

And yet somehow, it didn't even cross Sam's mind how dangerous it was to be walking into a battle against a goddess who forced people in happy relationships to throw them away for another lover when he himself with so in love with his brother's girlfriend.

* * *

><p>It was only a couple minutes before closing when Sam and Dean walked casually into D'Angelo's. A skinny kid in a formal waiter's uniform was sweeping in one corner of the Greek-style restaurant, while a woman who looked to be in her mid-forties stood by the counter.<p>

"Here they are," she said with a bright smile at the boys. "Jeff, you can go."

"It's Jim, actually," the kid muttered.

"Get out of my temple before I kill you, Jeff," the woman said with a forced smile, and he muttered in consent and walked past Sam and Dean out the door. They saw that his eyes were glazed like someone possessed, which he surely was.

"Sam. Dean. Have a seat." The woman gestured to an elegant table, lit with romantic candles and a vase of flowers and everything.

Dean snorted. "Yeah. Right. Look, if you know who we are, that must mean you're Aphrodite then."

She smiled slightly. "Well, I prefer Cythera now, but a handsome fellow like you, Dean Winchester? You can call me whatever you like."

Dean rolled his eyes. The goddess looked like a washed-up beauty queen. Her face was stretched oddly to try and prevent wrinkles since she looked to be in her mid-forties. She wore a little too much makeup, and her dirty blond hair was obviously dyed. She wore a purple, V-neck dress that was clearly meant to make her look sexy, but instead showed how her body was beginning to show signs of age. She had once been very beautiful, Dean could tell, but she was trying too hard to stay young and gorgeous, and it was somehow making her look worse.

"Wow," Dean whistled when she smiled again, and it was clear that her lips were not real, but obviously the outcome of plastic surgery. Her teeth were too white to be natural, and everything about her reeked of someone trying far too hard. "Listen, sweetheart, for the goddess of beauty, you really let yourself go."

She snarled at him, and her face grew quite unattractive. "I was once the most beautiful, desired woman in all of earth," she growled, stalking closer to them in ridiculous heels. "People came to me to find someone who loved them, or to be beautiful and desirable. If you were beautiful and loved, what more could you want? I was worshipped, and beloved by all. But now you, you pathetic, arrogant little mortals, you don't _need _love do you? Who needs love when you have war and politics and your fancy new sex toys? Who needs love when you have wealth and fame? Who needs beauty when you have that cursed _Photoshop_?!"

Sam and Dean both smirked slightly. "So because we don't need you anymore, you started killing us?" Sam asked, slightly confused.

Aphrodite laughed suddenly, her mood change startling them. Yep. She was a woman alright. "Nothing of the sort. You see, Sam Winchester, I believe in true love."

Sam groaned quietly, and Dean glanced over, a little confused. "Everyone has a perfect match, my dear," Aphrodite continued. "Someone who shares their interests, someone who makes them smile and laugh, someone who cheers them up when they are sad, someone they could spend the rest of their lives with. The most beautiful person in all the world to them."

Dean looked back and forth between Sam, who was glaring at his feet, and Aphrodite, who was smiling knowingly at his brother. "Some people have many possible matches, but I decide who their true love will be," she continued. "You may have heard of it—I hear kids these day call it _shipping_?"

Both brothers groaned. "However, unlike others, I can actually force my ships to be together!" she continued, clapping her hands delightedly. "Unfortunately, people are often with the wrong match. When I see someone who is with the wrong person, I just reveal to them who they truly should be with. Who they _truly _love. And if they choose to take out their spouse or partner so they can be with their one true love…well, who am I to stop them?" She laughed, morbidly amused.

Both brothers glared at her and pulled out stakes, but she waved her hand and they flew out of their hands across the room. "You're sick, Aphro," Dean snarled, defenseless but still able to always have a snappy comeback. "Can I call you Aphro?"

"No!" she snarled.

"Well, Aphro, it's just wrong to take someone who is already happy and make them give that up and hurt someone they love for something else they don't even really want. Someone _you _picked for them."

"Of course _you _would feel that way," she smirked. "I bet you Sam might be of a different opinion though."

"What?" Dean asked, confused, turning to his brother. Sam shook his head ever-so-slightly at the goddess, begging her with those puppy dog eyes not to do this.

"I don't _make _people fall in love," Aphrodite said with an almost cruel smile. "These people are already in love with someone else, and they just need a little push to admit what they know is right. Like…you two, for an example. And what excellent examples! Like you, Dean. You loved Lisa, but unfortunately that was never meant to be."

Dean stiffened like she had just hit him, but she plowed ahead. "And so many women have loved you, Dean, but you could not return their affections. Take Jo, for example. And so many others, all in love with the mysterious Dean Winchester they could never have. They simply weren't the ones, and now you've got lovely Julie and you two are so, so happy…so in love…and nothing could ever change that, right?"

Dean glared at her. This bitch was throwing all sorts of painful memories in his face, and if she was going to try to mess with him and Julie now…

But she had moved on to Sam. "And Sam…oh, poor, tragic Sam. You found your love, Jessica, but she was killed—how awful." Sam's eyes darkened with rage, and Dean wanted to kill the bitch. "And there were many other women…Amelia, Madison, Ruby…now that was a fun one! Not your best pick, Sammy, but always an entertaining story. I've watched you boys, and you're quite fun for an old gal like me. Such big, strong, handsome heroes…you just make the girls go wild. And you're brothers too. But the best part is…with all the women who would throw themselves at you, I've found myself a case even within two people as close as you."

"The hell are you talking about?" Dean snapped, trying to ignore the horrifying way his stomach had just dropped out of him.

"Like I said, I've been watching," Aphrodite explained. "Watching you and Julie fall in love was sweet, Dean. It got me interested in your love lives again. The great Dean Winchester, his heart stolen by a pretty, young hunter who saved him from the darkness inside him…how beautiful. And then, to top it off, she stole another's heart, and I couldn't help but interfere."

"Look, bitch, I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but-" Dean started to growl.

"Don't," Sam pleaded, and Dean stopped. "Please."

"But Sam, you know, don't you? It's not often I give someone a second chance at true love, but you deserve it. And you know you belong with her more than he does, don't you?" She smiled wickedly.

"What is she talking about, Sammy?" Dean said in a cold voice.

"Tell him, Sam. Tell your brother how you really feel. You don't have to hide anymore. You know as well as I do…he's not the right match for her."

"Sam…" Dean said slowly, his expression careful and cold.

Sam didn't want to. He wanted to go on pretending so they could be happy, but Aphrodite wouldn't let him. The words were pouring out, and he couldn't stop them. "Dean, I'm so, so sorry. I never meant—if I could have stopped it…I never wanted to hurt you…you were so happy, and I didn't want to ruin it…"

"What are you talking about." It wasn't a question anymore. They both knew, although neither wanted to say it.

"She's just so…so _good_," Sam continued at a whisper. "I didn't know how to…to not fall in love with her."

"Sam," Dean growled, his green eyes dark and cold. "No."

"Dean…I'm in love with Julie," Sam admitted finally, and he felt so free after getting it out, he added, "I have been. For a while now."

And there it was. The bombshell dropped because of this bitch goddess, the one that would destroy their relationship, which they had just gotten back to normal. And now, now Dean would hate Sam and leave him and he had lost everything because he couldn't stop himself from loving her.

"No," Dean repeated.

"I'm sorry," Sam said brokenly. "I couldn't help it."

"No, Sam, you could help it," Dean snarled, and Sam was scared by the intensity in his brother's voce. "You could help it, but you were always the spoiled one. Dad and I, we took care of you, made sure you were as happy as we could make you, gave you whatever you wanted. And now you saw something you wanted, and now you want to take it. Well, you know what, Sam? You can't have her. She is _mine-_"

"I know, Dean! I was never going to take her from you," Sam said quickly.

"You're right, you're not," Dean snarled. "She's in love with me, Sam. Not you. And just because you want to be banging my girlfriend does not mean that she's leaving me."

"I know that!" Sam snapped. "God, Dean, I would never take her from you! And it's not that I want to bang her! I mean, I kind of…but it's about _her_, Dean! She's so good, and we haven't had anyone good around in so long, and she and I-"

"Are never going to happen," his older brother snarled, and they were dangerously close. "And yeah, I know she's good, Sam. She was the one who saved me and helped me get myself back to normal when you were—where? Oh, that's right, _abandoning me_ when I _needed _you, Sam!"

Sam blinked, stung. "I…I'm sorry, Dean. I didn't mean for this to happen."

But Dean, like always, wasn't listening to his baby brother. "You're kidding me," he ranted. "Out of all the women in the world, you had to pick the one, the _one _that was in love with me, the one that I loved more than I've ever loved any woman?! No, Sam. You're not doing this. Stay out of my way, and don't you dare go near her, or I swear to god I'll kill you."

It was then that Dean knew this wasn't all him talking. Aphrodite must be fueling his anger somehow, because never, no matter what, would he threaten to kill his brother. But the two of them were riled up to stop and realize what she was doing, and the goddess stood near the door, arms crossed, watching the action unfold and smiling.

"I'm sick and tired of you telling me what to do, Dean!" Sam growled. "I'm not a kid. And I can't help that I love her, but you might as well give her a chance to see if she loves me too. You should at least let her choose!"

"She'd pick me, every time," Dean growled back, and they were practically nose-to-nose.

"But you're too scared to find out, aren't you?" Sam smirked. "Because you _know _Aphrodite's right, and we should be together. Not the two of you."

Dean finally lost it. He threw a punch, and Sam stumbled back, shocked. But then Sam recovered, and he slugged his older brother hard in the jaw, and within seconds they were fighting like only Winchester's could. They punched and kicked each other, spinning in a whirlwind of powerful, fast strikes. Finally, Dean got the jump on Sam and threw his brother into a wall. Sam stumbled, dazed, and Dean took a moment to pause and wipe the blood from his nose away.

But Sam had only been pretending to be dazed, and he lunged towards Dean, knocking the older Winchester flat on his back. Sam pulled out his knife and pressed it against Dean's throat, and Dean stared up at his baby brother, the spell broken for him as he realized Sam was about to kill him.

Sam pinned Dean down, breathing heavily, eyes frenzied. Dean grabbed Sam's wrist and struggled violently to throw his brother off of him, but Sam was bigger and had a good hold on him. Dean gave up and said, "Sam…"

Sam's brows furrowed as he began to doubt what he was doing, but Aphrodite appeared at his shoulder and whispered eagerly, "Do it, Sam. You know what you have to do. Kill him and take what you want. What you _deserve_. You know she would love you if it weren't for him. So why don't you allow you and Julie to be together, like you belong?"

"Shut the hell up," Dean growled at Aphrodite. Sam frowned and dug the edge of the blood into the soft skin of Dean's throat, and he froze. "Sam…" Dean said carefully. "Don't do this. This isn't you. Come on, think."

"He doesn't deserve her," Aphrodite crooned into Sam's ear. "You do, Sam. You would give Julie what she deserves, you know you would. Dean tried his hardest, but he's not good enough for her. He'll only get in the way."

Sam nodded slowly, and Dean saw it in his brother's eyes. Sam wasn't going to kill him, under this bitch's control. "Wait!" Dean cried. "Sammy, please…"

For a moment, it seemed that Sam was back to himself. But then Aphrodite touched his shoulder, and her power surged through him. "Do it for her, Sam. If you truly love her, you'll do this for her."

Sam gritted his teeth and pulled the knife back to stab Dean. Dean's eyes were wide with fear and disbelief and guilt. He had driven his little brother to this. It was his fault that Sam was going to kill him…

And then the only voice that had enough power to break Aphrodite's spell in this moment cried, "Sam, _no_!"

Sam stopped and his head whipped to see Julie standing in the doorway, holding a blessed stake. She looked absolutely horrified, and the spell was broken at the look on her face.

"I'll do this myself!" the goddess snarled, pulling Sam's knife out of his hand and lunging to stab Dean. But Sam roared in anger and tackled her, kicking the knife away from her. Sam held the goddess's arms down, and Julie rushed forward and stabbed the stake into her heart. Aphrodite wailed, and then she was still.

The entire room was still and silent as the three of them recovered. Then Julie scrambled over to Dean and helped him sit up. "What happened?" she asked him softly, taking in his bruised face, as well as Sam's.

"She…she was forcing us to try to kill each other," Sam said after a moment, still shocked and horrified at what he had admitted to Dean and what he had almost done to his brother.

"Oh, god…" Julie said, horrified. "Dean…"

She hugged him tightly, burying her face in his shoulder, and Sam looked down, ashamed. He had let that goddess get in his head. Of course she loved Dean and only Dean. Why on earth would she even for a second consider Sam? They were so happy, and he was the worst person imaginable for trying to ruin that. And the fact that he had nearly killed his brother over this…

Sam finally lifted his eyes to meet Dean's and his heart sank when he saw his brother glaring at him, even as he held Julie in his arms. And it was then Sam knew. He had ruined everything, the wonderful past few months they'd spent together. Nothing could ever be the same now. His secret was out, and now…now his beloved brother would probably hate him forever.

* * *

><p>The three hour car ride back to the bunker was completely silent. Dean was icy and cold to both Sam and Julie. There were a few moments when Julie tried to talk to Sam, but he sat in the back seat in some sort of stunned, guilty silence, hesitant to give her even one syllable answers. She gave up and played some great classic rock on the radio, but neither brother could get into the music, so she gave up and they drove through the darkness in silence.<p>

As soon as they got home, Julie quickly left them alone to work through this awkwardness so things could go back to normal. The second she was out of earshot, Sam turned to talk to Dean, and he found himself being thrown into the wall.

"Dean!" Sam choked out, surprised to find his older brother pinning him against the wall, eyes fiery. "What are you-?"

"You were going to kill me so that you could steal my girlfriend," Dean snarled.

"Dean…I…that wasn't me! At least…not all me," Sam said desperately.

"That doesn't change what happened," Dean said icily. "You try to make a move on Julie…you try to hurt me again…and I'm leaving Sam. And I'll take Julie with me, because despite what you seem to think, she's with _me_, not you!"

"I didn't…Dean, I know that!" Sam pleaded. "I didn't mean for that to happen. Ever. I won't do anything, I promise." Dean released him and turned away, disgusted. "I'm sorry," Sam said softly. "Please, Dean, how can I fix this?"

"You can't," he replied tiredly, and he walked away.

Sam resisted the urge to punch the wall. Just like him to screw up whatever happiness they had had before this. Because now, he had ruined it all in his usual Sam Winchester fashion. He didn't just screw up—he blew any chance he had at happiness out of the water.

* * *

><p>Julie looked up when Dean came into the bedroom. "Hey," she said gently, seeing the tired, worn, dark expression on his face. "You okay?"<p>

"Great," he muttered, pulling off his button-down shirt and his jeans without looking at her.

"Dean…what happened with you two?"

"That bitch made my little brother try to kill me," he replied icily.

Julie blinked, watching him get ready for bed in sharp, swift movements, radiating an icy distrust towards her. "Did I do something?" she snapped after a moment.

"Not a thing," he said shortly, and she couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic or not.

"What is wrong?!" Julie cried finally, when he wouldn't say anything else.

"Nothing," he said in a clipped voice, still not meeting her eyes.

"Bullshit."

Dean raised his eyebrows but didn't reply. He crawled under the covers and lay with his back to her. After a while, Julie tentatively reached out and touched his arm. "Dean…" she tried gently.

He flinched away from her touch. She couldn't remember a time he had ever done that. And it stung.

After a while, when it was clear he didn't want her there, Julie got up and walked out of the room. She found a quilt, one Sam had bought her for her twenty-eighth birthday a little while ago, and she curled up on the couch. It was a little while before she finally let the tears fall.

Meanwhile, alone in their bed, Dean stared up at the ceiling, full of raging, conflicting emotions, until he couldn't bear it and he started cussing and punching the pillow, hoping if he could just get all this hurt and jealousy and rage out, things could go back to the way they were.

And Sam lay in bed, not sleeping for hours, stuck in an endless cycle of self-hatred. He had ruined everything because he couldn't stop himself from falling for Dean's girl.

And for the first night in over a year, Dean and Julie slept alone and apart. And it wouldn't be the last.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen**

Julie woke up pissed. And not because of the crick in her neck from sleeping at an odd angle on the couch. Dean was thirty-six years old! He was a big boy now, and he could talk about his problems instead of pouting, or else he and Julie were going to have some serious problems…

It was a little after eight in the morning when she got off the couch and marched over to their bedroom. If he wasn't already awake, Dean soon would be. She knocked harshly on the door and got no answer. "Dean Winchester, get up right now!" she snapped. "We're going to talk about what the hell happened with you and Sam last night, and don't you dare try to ignore me!"

However, he was apparently brave or stupid enough to not reply, so Julie tried the door and found it unlocked.

She barged in, ready to tear into him, but instead found the bed empty and neatly made. Immediately, she knew something was wrong, even before she noticed his gun he kept by his pillow and his hunting knapsack were both gone, as well as his boots. She could feel it in the air in the room, and she knew. She knew he was gone, and as much as she wanted to pretend he was just in the bathroom, cowering in fear of her, she felt her stomach turn as the realization sunk in.

Julie noticed a folded piece of paper on Dean's pillow and slowly walked over and unfolded it. There, in his blocky handwriting read:

_Jules._

_I'm so sorry about this, but I can't be with you and Sam right now. I need to take some time, clear my head, and think about things. Don't be mad, please. I'll come back, at least to say goodbye for good if I'm really going._

Julie stopped reading as a wave of shock and horror hit her. She reread that last line about a dozen times as rage slowly filled her. If that man thought he was walking out on her after everything they'd been through, no matter what his reasoning, he was beyond stupid.

She took a deep breath to calm herself and then continued on reading.

_I can't tell you why I'm doing this. But just know that I can't be with Sam right now. Or you. And it's nothing you did, it's honestly my fault._

Of course it was _his_ fault. Freaking Dean Winchester, blaming himself for everything from Adam and Eve first eating some forbidden fruit to a little kid stubbing their toe halfway across the country!

_I found a case nearby last night. I'm pretty sure it's a djinn. Don't worry about me, Julie. I will be completely fine, and I'll come back when I know I can. Until then… watch out for Sammy, okay? __And tell him_

_I'll see you soon, Jules. Don't worry about me. I love you._

Julie stared at the paper for a long time, and then suddenly crumpled it in her fist before storming out of the room.

Sam was in the kitchen, pouring himself coffee, trying not to think about how just this time yesterday things were still okay between the three of them. He hadn't nearly killed Dean, and he hadn't let his dark secret slip, and he hadn't possibly ruined the great relationship they had going forever…

Sam looked up, startled, as Julie stormed into the kitchen. "Tell me what the hell happened between you and Dean last night," she snapped.

He stared at her, surprised by the intensity of her voice and how pissed off she seemed. Were she and Dean fighting? That was the last thing he wanted! Although, if they broke up…

No. Dean and Julie's relationship being ruined because of his selfishness was the last thing he wanted. "I don't…" Sam started weakly.

"Last night I slept on the couch because Dean wouldn't freaking talk to me, and now he's gone!" Julie cried. "You are telling me what happened, Sam Winchester, and what was bad enough to make my boyfriend leave me without even a goodbye besides some stupid note!"

Sam went white. "He…he left?"

"He's off on some hunt, _clearing his head_ and _thinking about things_," she said, practically spitting the words. She took a deep breath and stared up at Sam, and he saw fear and hurt in her eyes now that she was done ranting. "He _left_, Sam. And he said he was coming back, but…what the hell?" Her voice was softer and a lot more scared now.

Sam's face softened, and Julie saw a whole lot of guilt and pain in them. "I just…Aphrodite made us say things…things that we didn't…things that hurt each other. She was controlling me, Julie. I would never hurt Dean…"

"I know," Julie said gently, and she moved to comfort Sam, but then suddenly stopped. He looked down at her, confused at how she had suddenly stopped and the look of slow realization on her face. "Sam…" She stopped for a moment. "What did you fight about?"

He gulped. She was smart, and it wasn't too hard to guess. And as bad as Dean finding out had been, to actually have this woman, his brother's woman find out that he was in love with her…

He met her eyes, and for a long time they stared at each other. "You know," he sighed finally, looking down and turning away slightly.

Julie blinked, still overwhelmed at the sudden realization she had made as she moved to comfort Sam. And he had just confirmed it, hadn't he? They understood each other so well…he could tell what she was thinking, and he had confirmed it.

Sam. She had never thought of Sam that way. Well…that wasn't exactly true. There had been a couple moments when he had looked so handsome, or been so brave, or so funny, or so sweet…but no. Those were just little slip-ups, stupid, girly moments. She loved Dean, with all her heart. And Sam…she couldn't…could she?

Sam and Julie stood in the kitchen, not looking at each other in a horribly long, awkward silence. "We need to find him," Julie said after a long moment, when she had recovered a little from that shocking realization. "He's on a hunt, and he's unstable… the last time he was on a hunt like that with me, he was borderline suicidal!"

And just like that, Sam and Julie compartmentalized. Although they had a lot to work through and a lot to discuss, right now, Dean could be in trouble. And if there was one thing that could get them to move past all that, whether or not they loved each other, it was that they would both always love Dean.

* * *

><p>Dean sat up and looked around. He was in a small, messy apartment, beer cans strewn about the head of his bed. A couple pornos lay discarded on the floor, and a greasy burger wrapper and empty chip bag were sitting on the crowded table nearby. The place was messy and a little gross, if he was being honest. And he had no idea how he had gotten there.<p>

Dean got up and looked in the closet. He found a green button-down shirt, one of his own, and an old, worn pair of jeans that he knew well. So this was his place, then. Huh.

As he was finishing getting dressed, his phone started ringing. He rushed to pick it up and then froze, staring at the name flashing on the screen.

Bobby Singer.

Hand trembling slightly, Dean answered the call and asked in an almost scared voice, "Hello?"

"You're late, boy," growled a voice so familiar and gruff it made Dean's heart leap into his throat. "You were supposed to be here twenty minutes ago."

"I…Bobby?" Dean choked out, not even processing the words, just soaking in the voice. God, he had missed this man who had been like a father to him. At least until a few years ago, when he had been shot through the head by Dick Roman, a Leviathan, and died, leaving Sam and Dean completely alone with no one but each other.

Now, Dean may be about to lose Sam, but if he somehow miraculously had Bobby back…

"No, it's that kinky Asian chick from a couple nights ago," Bobby growled. "Of course it's me. Where the hell are you, Dean? We've got a full schedule."

"I'm…sorry, Bobby. I'm…still at my place," Dean said slowly, looking around and trying to figure out what was going on.

"Dean Winchester, you may be the closest thing I've got to a son, but I am not afraid to whoop your ass if you don't get over here, _now_!"

"Over where?" Dean asked stupidly.

"Over-?" Bobby spluttered, sounding like he couldn't believe Dean right now. "Jesus Christ, Dean! What did you _do_ last night?!"

"I, uh…" Last night he left Sam and Julie to…to what again?

"Forget it," Bobby sighed. "Over to _work_, you idiot."

"…Work?" Dean asked weakly, knowing how dumb he sounded.

Bobby took a moment to get his temper under control before spitting through his teeth, "Yes, work. That thing you and I do together? Even the great Dean Winchester has to deign to work sometimes." Dean didn't say anything, and Bobby sighed. "My mechanic shop? Next to Gary's restaurant?"

"Gary Hoover?" Dean guessed, finally understanding something.

"At least he remembered something," Bobby muttered. "Yes, you absolute moron! Get over here, pronto."

Dean couldn't help it; he grinned a little at that moment of sheer Bobby. But then his brow furrowed. "Wait. Gary Hoover used to live in…Lawrence?"

There was a beat. "I'm not even sure I want you coming into work," Bobby said after a moment. "Yes, he lives in Lawrence! So do you, Dean! And me, and your mother and Sam and-"

"Mom?" Dean cried, and then stopped himself as he finally realized what must be happening.

"Just get here as soon as you can," Bobby sighed, exasperated, and Dean distinctly heard him mutter, "Idjit," before he hung up.

Dean wasn't sure whether to laugh, cry, or stab himself. He remembered now everything that had happened that morning after he left the bunker. He had found the warehouse where the djinn was staying. He had stabbed the monster with a knife covered in lamb's blood and let his guard down, thinking it was over.

But the djinn had a mate. And when he had killed her mate, she had thrown herself at him, shrieking about how she would make him pay, and then everything had gone dark.

But if this was her punishment…she must not be very good at her job. To give him back the man he loved like a father _and _his mother was one of the greatest gifts anyone could ever give him!

Dean knew he should kill himself to escape whatever world the djinn had concocted for him and try to kill her, but who knew if he woke back up if he could even get free? And she would surely just kill him if she knew she couldn't keep him down. And…why not at least take a chance to see Bobby and his mother for a little bit before he went?

Dean drove to work quickly and Bobby greeted him by cussing at him for a good thirty seconds before he stopped to take a breath. Dean just grinned and wrapped the bearded, baseball cap-sporting older man in a bear hug.

"The hell-?" Bobby started.

Dean quickly released him and grinned. "Sorry I'm late," Dean said quickly, grinning so eagerly that Bobby's face softened slightly.

"Just get to work on that car," Bobby sighed, shaking his head as Dean practically ran over to an old Ford truck and began tinkering with the engine.

And so, Dean spent one of the most enjoyable days he could remember, working on cars with Bobby, talking to the man he had once loved so dearly, and still did. He got all caught up on the world he was stuck in, one where all the people he loved dearly seemed to living in the same town and got along well. Bobby and Dean kept their banter going for a while, teasing each other and cussing and laughing together like they had since he was about ten. God, had he missed this!

At one point, Bobby stopped and asked Dean if he was going over to Mary's tonight. "What for?" Dean asked, confused.

Bobby's expression darkened. "Come on, Dean. I know that you two have never been…that close, but can't you just go? For your mom's sake? It would make her so happy."

Dean wanted to ask what he was talking about, but it seemed like acting like he didn't know what was going on was an asshole move, so Dean just assured Bobby he was going, and at the end of the work day, he hugged his surrogate father goodbye and drove over to his childhood home, the place where his mother had once died, but now apparently lived.

When Dean knocked on the door, Mary Winchester opened it and stared at him in shock. She looked lovely, even though she looked significantly older than the last time he'd seen her. Her hair was greying and up in a bun, and she wore a pretty purple dress. Her pretty, slightly wrinkled face broke into a smile and she cried, "Dean! You came!"

"Yeah," he laughed a little uncertainly. His mother pulled him in for a hug, and he held her longer than necessary, burying his face in her shoulder until he could compose himself.

When he pulled away, he grinned at her. "Mom, you look beautiful," he sighed, taking her in again.

She smiled fondly and patted his shoulder. "Thank you, Dean. You look handsome as always. Still no girl?"

"I…" Dean swallowed. "No. Nope."

"Too bad," Mary sighed. "Come on in, sweetheart. Sam will be here any minute, and then we can go out." She took in Dean's outfit and bit her lip. "I do wish you had dressed up a little more…" she sighed.

"I just came from work. With Bobby." It had started out as an excuse, but now he was proud. So what if in this world he lived alone, with no girlfriend? He worked with Bobby, his mother and brother were alive and well and they all lived in the same town. How could this be any better?

Dean and Mary talked for a while, and he was basking in her glow, still kind of awed to see his mother alive and well and having actually aged and lived her life. She had gotten to watch her sons grow up, and they had not become hunters. It was all she had wanted, and he was so happy for her.

Not long after Dean arrived, there was a knock on the door. Mary rushed to answer it and pulled the tall, long-haired man before her into a long hug. "Oh, Sammy!" she sighed, stroking her hair. "Happy anniversary, sweetheart!"

Dean smiled slightly. So _that's _why they were meeting. Sammy had finally gotten the life he had wanted, the life he deserved, and Dean could not be happier for his little brother.

Sam spotted Dean and looked surprised. "Wow. Hey, Dean. You came."

Why was it such a surprise that Dean had come to his brother's anniversary? They were _brothers _for god's sake!

Before Dean could reply, Sam suddenly turned and said, "Oh, sorry, honey. Come in."

He stepped out of the doorway so his wife could come into the house, and Dean started to grin, expecting to see Jessica, beautiful as always and living the life she was supposed to with Sam.

But instead he found himself staring at a different blond, blue-eyed beautiful woman in a black dress he would recognize in any universe. And then he understood how this djinn was getting her revenge for Dean killing her mate.

Because Sam's wife was Julie.

* * *

><p><em>You are formally invited to the wedding of Juliet Grace Carters and Samuel Winchester.<em>

Dean reread the framed wedding invitation on the wall and then turned and looked at the photo next to it. The photo was straight out of a photo-shoot, two impossibly attractive people with their arms around each other, about to cut a beautiful wedding cake. The groom was tall and muscular, with a handsome face and shaggy brown hair, and he was staring down at the beautiful bride with love in his eyes. She was laughing, her eyes closed, blond curls falling around her pretty face, looking absolutely gorgeous in her white wedding dress. Two happier people you had never seen. Dean knew he should be overjoyed seeing Sam at his own wedding, looking that happy and in-love.

But that was _his _Julie standing next to Sam in that picture. And that was _his _Julie sitting next to Sam just a few feet away, smiling and chatting with his mother, holding hands with her husband. Her husband who wasn't him.

This was all wrong. Dean couldn't bear it. All night, at the fancy restaurant they had gone to, he had barely been able to say more than a few words to Julie as she and Sam talked about how successful and happy they were, a lawyer and a nurse. He wasn't sure what was worse: the loving looks they kept giving each other, or that moment when Mary had asked about kids, and they had admitted that even though it had only been two years, they were thinking about it.

Kids. Sam could be a father, and Dean would be an uncle, and the thought of the joy that would bring his baby brother made Dean so happy he thought he would burst. But that baby would be Julie's kid too, and the thought of Julie bearing anybody's kid but his own…

This whole night had been salt in his wounds. He had gotten away from Sam and Julie to clear his head, and instead he was having to watch them be a happily married couple thinking about kids. He knew he should go into the bathroom and slit his wrists with a steak knife or something and get out of here, but there was something else.

Sam was so happy. Sammy was so friggin' happy, and Julie was too. Although they were both a little cool and distant towards him, not seeming very comfortable around him, Dean could tell how truly happy they were. And a world where the two people he loved the most were so happy, and where his mother and Bobby were all alive…that was a world he never wanted to leave.

Dean sat on the sidelines the whole night, just watching. He watched his beautiful mother, beaming with pride at her successful son and his beautiful, wonderful wife. He watched Sam and Julie sipping champagne, watched Sam whisper something probably dirty in her ear, watched them making out when they thought no one was looking. And it was so painful that he ended up leaving early so that he could crash the Impala into a tree or something so that he could get out of here and not have to be reminded how perfect Sam and Julie would be together.

But as Dean sat in his car, trying to figure out the least painful way to kill himself, Sam and Julie walked out of his mother's house. He watched them walk to their car in the moonlight, watched the sweet, tender way they kissed and the smile Julie gave Sam before they got into their car and drove home.

They were happy. They were happy and in love. His mother was alive, and she too was happy. Bobby was alive as well, and as happy as Bobby could be. And Dean knew then that he couldn't leave a world like this where four people he loved were so happy just because he was miserable.

And so Dean drove back to his small, dirty apartment, and he found himself actually starting to look forward to the next day…

* * *

><p>Okay, so maybe splitting up had not been the best idea.<p>

It hadn't taken Julie and Sam long to find the djinn case Dean had gone to take care of, since half of their tricks for finding cases they had learned from each other. Within twelve hours of discovering Dean's disappearance, the two of them were outside the very warehouse he had entered not long ago. The two of them had spoken strictly about the case and finding Dean since that moment in the kitchen, but now, possibly about to walk straight to their deaths, or to find Dean dead…Julie's emotions were heightened. And muddled. And being near Sam was not helping.

So she suggested they split up. Julie wandered alone through the dark warehouse, a knife coated in lamb's blood gripped tightly in her hand. She searched for nearly ten minutes before she finally found a room where a teenage girl and adult man hung side-by-side from the ceiling, their chained wrists holding them upright.

Julie's stomach lurched when she recognized Dean and saw a little blood on his neck. The djinn must already have drunk from him and put him under their spell in the few short hours he'd been gone. Time passed differently in that dream world though, and Dean could feel like he had been under for days.

"Dean," she gasped before rushing to him. And, like an idiot, she dropped her blade and cupped his face in her hands. He was limp and unconscious, though, and she got no response no matter how much she pleaded for him to wake.

Julie was so worried about Dean she didn't even hear the djinn coming up behind her until suddenly…

Julie shot up in bed, breathing heavily. Something was wrong. Something with Dean. She couldn't remember what exactly though. It had probably just been one of those nightmares she had about him in danger or him dying or him killing with the Blade that she often had.

The man in beside her stirred slightly, and he rubbed her leg soothingly. Julie sighed and turned to look at Dean's sleepy green eyes and mussed light brown hair and instead found herself staring at a completely different hot, shirtless Winchester.

"Sam?" she blanched, taking in the puppy dog eyes and shaggy hair of the younger Winchester. The hell was she doing in bed with _Sam_?

His brow creased. "Hey, Julie. You okay?"

"I…I…" Julie's head was spinning. Something was very wrong. This wasn't right. The last thing she remembered was Dean, Dean chained up somewhere, a dark place, a warehouse…

Everything clicked into place, and she wasn't sure if she should be relieved or terrified. Julie pushed her loose blond curls out of her face and took a deep, steadying breath, trying to think. But Sam sat up next to her and his large hand brushed across her bare shoulder, and then she couldn't think at all.

"Hey," he said gently. "What's wrong? Did you have a nightmare?"

Julie stared at him with wide, blue eyes. "Sam, I…I have to talk to Dean."

She got out of bed without another word and dug through the dresser until she found her clothes and started to get dressed. Sam stared at her, not sure he'd heard that right. "Dean as in…my brother?" he asked suspiciously.

"What other Dean's do we know?" she pointed out, pulling on a pair of jeans. Julie knew she should feel more awkward in front of Sam in little more than her underwear, but modesty was the least of her worries right now.

"But…have you two ever actually talked just the two of you? Like…ever?"

Julie turned to stare at him and saw he was serious. Wow. In whatever universe this was, Dean and Julie didn't even talk. She couldn't even imagine…

"Look, Sam, I just…I need to talk to him." She found a phone on the nightstand, her phone, and found Dean's number on the cell. Sam got out of bed and quickly got dressed, watching her in confusion as she began to talk to his brother on the phone.

Dean picked up on the third ring and asked almost suspiciously, "…Julie?"

Julie sighed, so relieved to hear his voice. "Dean? It's me."

Dean laughed nervously. "I know it is. Is there something you and Sam need?"

"No, Dean, listen. It's _me_."

There was a brief moment, and then Dean said in a much more intimate voice, "Oh, god. Jules?"

Julie laughed in relief. "Yeah. Yeah, it's me. Really me. Listen, Dean, what's going on? How come I woke up in bed with _Sam_?"

The youngest Winchester stiffened at that last question and gave her an odd, hurt look. She wasn't even paying him a bit of attention, though. "Julie, he's, uh…in this universe…he's your husband," Dean said carefully.

Julie gasped as she noticed the beautiful silver ring on her hand. She stared at it, still processing. "I…what…Dean, I don't understand. Did the djinn send you into this universe?"

"Yeah. Did she get you too then?"

"Yeah, but Sam's there too," Julie said. "He'll help us. But listen, I need to talk to you. And actually see your face. Where are you?"

"My apartment," he said, and there was a smirk in his voice. "I have an apartment now."

"Wow. What is this place?"

"It's great, Jules," Dean said, sounding like a happy little kid. "My mom and Bobby…they're both alive. I've been here three days and I guess it's just…it's good to be with them, even if they're not actually real."

"That's great, Dean," Julie said. "But listen, we've got to get out of here. Who knows what could be happening back in the real world right now? How close are you to…wherever I am?"

"I live about ten minutes from your place," Dean said. "I'll be there as soon as I can."

"Great. Okay." Julie took a breath. "And then we can talk about you leaving Sam and I."

She could imagine him wincing. "Jules, I'm sorry-"

"Don't worry about it right now," she sighed. "Just get here. Fast."

"I will."

"Okay. I love you." Julie added that last bit without a second thought, purely out of habit, and then she hung up.

She had forgotten about her husband standing three feet away though.

Julie turned around and saw a mix of shock, jealousy, hurt, and anger on his face. She opened her mouth, but she could not think of a single thing to say to even begin to explain this.

She just hoped Dean got here fast.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes later, Dean knocked on the door of the nice house where Sam and Julie lived. He had visited once since being put in this alternate universe, but it was clear Sam and Dean weren't close, so he hadn't stayed long. Also, it was hard for him to look around and know that Sam and his girlfriend had probably done it on that couch, that seat, the floor over there, that rug…<p>

This time, though, he barely even had time to knock before the door flew open, and someone grabbed his collar. Sam dragged him inside and slammed the door behind Dean, who was struggling to keep his balance. "What the hell, Sam?" Dean snapped, righting himself.

He saw Julie standing a few feet away, covering her mouth with her hand. He knew in an instant that it was his Julie. The other Julie had curled her curls even more every day and wore sheer blouses or fancy skirts. This Julie had done little more than brush her curls, and she wore faded jeans and a t-shirt.

"What the hell is going on between you and my wife, and for how long?" Sam growled.

"Sam, what are you-?" Dean started.

"Don't play dumb," Sam snarled, and for being the younger brother, he was pretty freaking intimidating. "Three days ago, you actually come to our anniversary, and then you're suddenly talking to us and being friendly. At first I thought you were finally being less of an asshole, but then my wife, _my wife_, calls my brother and says she _loves_ him? The hell did you do?!"

Sam shoved Dean angrily, and Dean laughed bitterly. "Oh, you don't want to pick a fight with me, Sammy. Not in this universe. You're not even a hunter here."

"A _what_?!"

Dean looked past Sam towards Julie. "Should we even bother trying to explain, or just blow our brains out now?" he asked her.

"What?" In an instant, Sam went from confused and pissed to confused and terrified. "Or do _what_?!"

"We should definitely explain," Julie said. "He deserves an explanation."

"What is going on?" Sam asked, sounding more defeated than angry now. The fight was going out of him as he grew more and more lost.

"Well, first off, Julie is not your wife," Dean said. "She is my girlfriend. So she was in no way cheating on you with me because she is in fact with me."

"She's not my wife?" Sam asked in disbelief. "_That's _the excuse you're going with?"

"It's not an excuse, Sam," Julie said gently. "He's telling the truth. Whatever Julie was your wife is gone now, and I'm sorry."

"We're hunters," Dean explained. "We were fighting a djinn and it sent us into an alternate universe where people we loved were dead, but the woman I love was with my brother as revenge for me killing their mate."

Sam stared at them. "You're crazy. I can't believe this."

"You don't have to," Dean snapped. "It's the truth, though. This happened to me once before. To escape I had to kill myself, and I'm pretty sure that's what we have to do to get out of this one."

"_Pretty _sure?" Julie repeated nervously.

"Maybe ninety percent…"

"I don't like that ten percent."

"Stop," Sam said, and he sounded so desperate that both Julie and Dean turned and looked at him. Julie's heart broke for the confusion and panic on Sam's face. She couldn't even imagine having her spouse wake up a different person, a person apparently in love with her sibling, who was talking about killing himself…

"Wait. Please." His eyes were shining. "Julie…you can't kill yourself. Please, you're my wife. I can't lose you."

She bit her lip. "Sam, I'm sorry, but…I'm not your wife. You don't even know me."

"No?" Sam snapped. "Is your name Juliet Grace Carters?"

"Well, yes, but-"

"Were your parents Katrina and Thomas Carters?"

"They were, but, Sam-"

"Do you love to read poetry and science-fiction and fantasy? Do you still believe Harry Potter is the greatest book series you've ever read?" Julie smiled slightly at that, but Sam wasn't done. "Have you always wanted a dog, but you're allergic? Do you love the smell of apples and rain? Have you always wanted to be a singer since you were a kid?"

"Sam…" Julie said weakly.

"Am I your best friend in the whole world?" he continued, his eyes determined.

Julie's mouth twitched. "Yes," she admitted softly.

"Do you love me?"

Julie looked down. "Look, Sam…I'm not her. I'm not your wife."

"You're the same person, though!" Sam cried. "You could be, if you wanted. You could love me again, I know you could!"

Julie glanced over at Dean, who was looking down. "I'm gonna call my mom and Bobby, say goodbye," he said quietly before walking out of the room.

"Sam, listen-" Julie started again.

"No, you listen!" he snapped. "I met you four years ago in New York on a case. You were singing in a bar, and you were the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen. I thought I'd never see you again after that night, but then you moved to Kansas a few months later to just be a nurse, and I knew." Sam moved closer to her and put his hands on her shoulders, talking earnestly. "Julie, I love you so much. And you love me too, I know you do. Or you did. You could. Please, Julie, just…don't do this."

Julie looked down, the spell he had been casting with those words and those eyes breaking. "This isn't real," she told herself. "You're not real."

"I'm not real?" he snapped. "This isn't _real_?! You're wrong, Julie. This _is _real. That year in France was real, our wedding was real, me falling for you, _you _falling for _me_…that was real, and you're never going to convince me it wasn't."

"I don't have to convince you," she sighed. "It won't matter in a couple minutes anyway."

"How can you do this?" Sam asked after a moment, hurt. "And why would you want to? We were so happy! Are you really telling me you're happy back in that other world where you hunt monsters and kill things?"

"I…" Julie took a deep breath and stepped away from Sam. They were too close, and his voice was too warm and his eyes were too gentle and hurting…

"I'm sorry, Sam," she whispered. "I have to."

Sam shook his head. After a long moment, he asked, "So in this other world, you're in love with Dean?" She nodded. "But not me?" Julie looked down. "How could I not love you?" he asked, frustrated. "I just can't believe that in any universe I wouldn't love you."

"Actually…" Julie said weakly.

"Oh." Sam swallowed. "So, I'm in love with you in your other world, but you _still _don't love me?"

"I never said…" Julie sighed, so overwhelmed by all of these emotions and everything that was going on. "I can't, Sam! I love Dean, and he loves me! I can't love you, too!"

"Can't or won't?"

"It doesn't matter," Julie snapped. "None of this does. I'll be gone in a minute, and it won't matter."

That's how it should have ended, but Sam's expression changed into a heartbreakingly scared one. "Julie, no, please," he begged her. "Don't do this to me. I can't lose you, I just can't. Please. I love you."

Maybe it was the fact that none of this would matter in a minute anyway, or that he was hurting so much, or the way he said those three words. But Julie just couldn't anymore. She couldn't fight that part of her anymore, and without consciously deciding to do so, she suddenly stepped forward, stretched up on her tiptoes, and kissed Sam Winchester.

It was a good kiss. A great kiss. It was as natural as breathing for them, which was odd because Julie had never kissed Sam before. His hands fit on her waist and the back of their head like they were made to, and her hands curled behind his head, tangling in his long hair. Their lips parted and moved in the same rhythm, and for a long moment, Julie was on a kind of high she had almost never experience before.

It was the kind of kiss that made every part of you come alive. The kind of kiss that left you wanting more. And when Julie pulled away after a long moment, she did want more. A lot more.

But out of the corner of her eye, she saw Dean standing in the doorway, watching them, his face an unreadable mask.

Julie quickly pulled away from Sam, and Dean walked over to them. "I made the calls," he said flatly. "Ready?"

He held out a gun to Julie, and she took it, hands shaking. "Dean…" she started, but he looked away and she stopped.

"Wait," Sam begged. "Please. I can't lose my brother and my wife in the same day."

"I'm sorry, Sammy," Dean said softly. "Give Bobby and Mom my love, if you don't cease to exist after this."

And he pulled the trigger.

Sam cried out, and Julie squeezed her eyes shut. Although she knew it wasn't really real, she could not look over there and see Dean's bloody corpse. Not after everything else she'd gone through today.

Sam's eyes were shining with tears. "Dean…" he said weakly. Then he turned to look at Julie. "Honey, please…_no_…"

Julie took a deep, shuddering breath. There were so many emotions going through her, but there was one that she had been suppressing for weeks, and she knew this was her one chance to admit it. So Julie raised her eyes to meet Sam's familiar ones and admitted for the first and probably last time, "I love you, Sam."

And then she pulled the trigger.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen**

Julie woke up crying Sam's name. She thrashed wildly for a moment before she realized that she was in a dark warehouse, dangling from chained wrists, not in her and Sam's home. The next thing she realized was that she was crying. She was crying over having lost that world where Sam was her husband and they were happily in love.

"Julie!" She realized that Dean was hanging only a couple feet away, and he was trying to calm her down. "Julie, it's okay! You're okay. We both are."

Julie glanced up at the chains holding them up, and Dean smirked very slightly. "Well, maybe not okay, but not dead…"

His face…Julie's insides contracted with guilt. His eyes were dull and lifeless, and there was grief and hurt etched in every line of his face. Not only had he just lost his beloved mother and surrogate father all over again, but he had walked in on Julie and Sam making out and then had to watch his girlfriend crying over losing Sam. And if he knew how Sam felt about her, which he surely did, she was only making things worse for him.

Julie took a slow, deep breath and got her emotions under control. "We have to get out of here," she said after a moment.

"Good luck with that," a woman's high, cold voice said, and Dean and Julie both looked up to see a heavily tattooed woman with white skin and inhuman blue eyes approaching them. She shook her head slightly. "I should have known putting you in the same dream was too risky. But you two really should have stayed asleep."

She advanced on Julie, and Dean panicked. "Hey, leave her alone! _Hey_!"

At the last possible second, even as the djinn raised her hand to touch Julie's head and it glowed with blue flames, Julie suddenly jumped and, using the chains holding her as a support, got up high enough that she could give the monster a hard, two-leg kick in the chest.

The djinn went flying backwards as Julie landed, and they were safe for a second at least as the monster recovered. Dean yanked hard on his chains, but he was trapped and useless.

The djinn got to her feet and growled at Julie. She dove at Dean's girlfriend, and he started to cry out, but a tall, broad-shouldered figure leapt out of the shadows and drove a bloody knife up into the djinn's ribcage.

Dean stared at Sam as he threw the dying djinn to the ground. "Sam!" Julie sighed in relief as he quickly found a key and unlocked her wrists. She fell into his arms and they held each other for a long moment.

Dean was finding it hard to swallow. All he could see was Julie and Sam kissing, arms wrapped around each other, tongues down each other's throats…it hadn't been this Sam, obviously, but that didn't change the fact that Julie had kissed his brother. As much as Dean had wanted to hope against it, it was clear that Julie had feelings for Sam, too.

Julie seemed to remember Dean was there, and she quickly pulled away from Sam. They got Dean free, and they freed the teenage girl who was the other victim. She woke up groggily and they rushed her to the hospital before piling back into the Impala and driving home in silence once again.

Julie knew what was going to happen. Sam and Dean would push their emotions down and ignore the problem in the hopes of preserving their relationship, and then over time things would get worse until everything exploded and this system they had going would be gone for good.

She couldn't let that happen. She couldn't lose either of them, and she couldn't let the two brothers split apart because of her. So when they got back to the bunker a little before midnight and walked silently into their home, ready to go to their separate beds without speaking, she snapped, "Where the hell do you think you're going?"

Dean, who had been headed for their bedroom, looked up, confused. "To bed?" he muttered.

"No, you're not," she snapped. "You either, Sam. We're going to settle this right now and then you both can get over this stupid fight and be brothers again."

Dean and Sam refused to look at each other. "It's not going to be that easy, Julie," Sam said quietly. "I said some pretty awful things because of Aphrodite-"

"We don't have to do this, Sam," Dean interrupted him flatly. "This isn't going to be an issue."

"I'm pretty sure it already is," Julie pointed out.

"I'll go," Dean said, sounding so very tired.

Sam and Julie stared at him, shocked. "What do you mean 'go'?" Julie snapped.

"I mean I'll get out of your way. Your grandmother saw it, Crowley saw it, Jody saw it, the friggin' goddess of love saw it, and now the entire universe seems to be saying it, so I'll get out of your way."

He turned around and started to walk away, but Julie rushed over and grabbed his arm, spinning him back to the face him. "Oh, hell, no, Dean Winchester," she said fiercely. "You are not running out on me. Not over something like this."

"Something like-?!" Dean spluttered. "Julie, my brother is in love with my girlfriend, and she's in love with him. If there was ever a time to walk out, it would be now."

"Not happening," Julie said firmly. "I am not losing you, I don't care what your reasoning is. Sam, do you want Dean to leave?"

"Of course not!" Sam said honestly, without hesitation. Although there was a part of him that wanted Julie all to himself, nothing on this earth was worth losing Dean.

"Great, so you're staying." Dean sighed, and Julie snapped, "Dean, we can fix this! We can work through this. We don't have to lose each other! But you have to work with us…"

"Not tonight," Dean said in a voice so tired and pained Julie instantly felt bad. "Just…please, not tonight."

This time, Julie let him go and watched Dean disappear into the many halls of the bunker, trying to hide how hurt and scared she was right now. She could _not _lose him. Not now, not ever.

"Julie, I'm…I'm sorry," Sam said after a long moment.

"Don't be," Julie said softly, still staring after Dean.

"I screwed everything up," he said in an anguished voice, putting his head in his hands for a moment. "God. If I had just been able to control myself, but…Dean's right, I'm selfish…I never meant-"

"Stop," Julie said suddenly, turning to face him. "Do not hate yourself for this, or blame yourself-"

"But it's my fault!"

"Don't you think Dean is sitting in his room thinking the exact same thing?" Julie pointed out. "Don't you think I blame myself? Look, we can't be angry with ourselves for what we feel. We just need to…control it. Control ourselves. I think, over time, we could get over it and things could just be normal again."

"I could just go," Sam said softly. "Then you two could be happy again."

"We wouldn't, though," Julie insisted. "Sam, you are everything to Dean! He can't lose you, not again. And besides…I would miss you, too. You…mean a lot to me. I just…I want to find a way to save this…us."

Sam nodded, but there was a creeping suspicion slowly filling him. The way Julie was talking, the way she wouldn't meet his eyes, and what Dean had said about his girlfriend being in love with his brother as well…

"Julie…" he tried carefully. "I…do you…?"

She looked up and her blue eyes actually met his. She bit her lip and then sighed. "I don't know, Sam. I'm all mixed up right now, and I love Dean…"

"I know, I know," Sam said quickly. "I'm sorry. I ruined that, I did. And I just…I'm sorry."

Julie took a step towards Sam to comfort him, but then both of them stiffened. Damn, this was going to be hard. But if this was ever going to work, if they were going to get over their feelings for each other…they were going to have to back off. No more long embraces or inside jokes, no long, midnight conversations or hours of reading together. They both knew that to prove to Dean that nothing was going on between them, they were going to have to back their relationship off. A lot. There was no other way Dean would believe that Julie loved him and only him, and that Sam was not in love with her anymore.

But damn, was this going to be hard!

Sam and Julie both smiled and laughed a little nervously. "Okay," Julie said after a moment. "So…"

"I should go to bed," Sam said quickly.

"Me too."

They started to walk in opposite directions, but Sam had to know. "Julie…?" he called, and she stopped and turned to face him.

"What happened to you and Dean?" he asked carefully. "What did you see?"

She took a deep breath and looked him right in the eye. "We were in a world where Bobby Singer and your mother were still alive, and you are I were there too. And we…we were married."

Sam blinked. "And…he _stayed_?"

"Well, he was surrounded by people he loved," Julie said. "And we were happy. All of us…we were very happy."

Sam nodded. He wanted to ask what his other world self, Julie's husband had been like and what happened between them. He wanted to ask her if she loved him, or if she could learn to. He wanted to kiss her so badly.

"Goodnight, Julie," Sam said stiffly, and he walked away, shutting down those thoughts. From now on, those thoughts were completely off-limits. Because as much as may want Julie, as much as he thought he loved her…she was not worth losing Dean over.

Julie watched Sam go, and she thought of all those nights spent talking, the way he made her laugh like no one else could, how he had saved her on various hunts, the way his arms felt around her, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, how his bangs fell into his handsome face, the way his lips had felt on hers…

She loved him. Even if it was just a little bit, she knew she did. But as great as Sam was, as much as she may want that…she couldn't lose Dean. Nothing was worth that to her. Nothing.

Dean looked up as Julie walked into their bedroom. He had half-wanted her to come in so they could talk, half-hoped that she and Sam would hook up so he could just leave for good and not be stuck in this uncertain new territory.

They stared at each other for a long time, and then Julie said softly, "We need to talk."

"Are you breaking up with me?" Dean smirked, only half-joking.

Julie sat down on the bed, a respectful distance away from him. "Please, Dean. I can't handle this…this…I don't even _know_ what this is! But we've never had a fight like this, and I don't know what to do to prove to you that…"

"That what?" Dean asked. "That you don't love Sam? Because, Julie…do you? Do you love Sam?"

"No!" she snapped, appalled. And then, "…Maybe. A little. I don't know."

Dean put his head in his hands. It was happening. He couldn't stop it, and he couldn't change it. But hadn't he always known this was coming? Aphrodite was right; they were perfect for each other. Why get in the way?

"Dean, look," Julie said firmly. "Maybe, in another world, if it weren't for you, Sam and I could love each other. But there is a you, and I'm always going to choose you, okay? Always. And I know Sam would never do anything to hurt you, and you know it too. The two of us are going to work together to fix this, but you have to work with us, please." He was silent, head still buried, and she asked in a tiny voice, "Dean?"

"Can I just sleep?" he asked flatly.

Julie blinked, a little hurt. Although surely not as hurt as he must be. "I…okay. Just…promise me you won't leave again?"

"I won't leave," Dean sighed, and Julie knew that was the best she was going to get. So she left, and Julie and Dean spent their second night separate and alone.

* * *

><p>Julie had always hated love triangles in books and TV shows and movies. One, it was always two amazingly gorgeous, funny, caring guys fighting over one completely ordinary girl, which was a little ridiculous. But she had always believed that any woman who kept two good men dangling because she liked being the center of attention was pretty damn awful.<p>

So for the next week, she did her best to make it very clear where she stood. This was not a love triangle. This was a couple on the brink of falling apart, and then Sam on the outside.

To be fair to Sam, he was being absolutely wonderful. Although neither of them had gone out and said it, they both knew that, while there may be feelings between them, they had to stop. Sure, Sam and Julie could still be friends. But there couldn't be anything romantic between them. Neither of them wanted a relationship enough to risk losing Dean, and so for the next week, they were able to slowly get their emotions under control. They were careful to keep their interactions casual and nothing more than friendly, and a lot less frequent than normal.

And…it sort of worked. When they weren't together, both of them were able to think clearly and realize that this just wasn't worth it. And over time, Sam got his dark, forbidden thoughts under control, and Julie sorted through her emotions until she knew where she stood: she would always love Sam as a close friend. But she could never love him like she loved Dean, and that was that.

On the fifth day after returning to the bunker, Sam and Julie ran into each other in the library and had their first real interaction since then. For the first time in days, their conversation didn't feel slightly forced, and there were no awkward pauses. They laughed for real, and suddenly things felt like normal again. But in a different, less intimate way. Julie was able to look at him and think how great he was without feeling like she was cheating on Dean. And for the first time in ages, Sam was able to appreciate Julie without a sort of longing to have her as his.

They had really done it, or were in the process of doing it. They had overcome the feelings that had threatened to destroy what they had built over the past few months. And it was all because they were willing to work together and let go of the past, and because they wanted to save their relationships with Dean.

Even Sam and Dean were able to speak again. At first, they only spoke when necessary, but five days after returning to the bunker, Dean stumbled into Sam's room, half-drunk, and started apologizing so profusely Sam had to tell him four times to shut up before he stopped. Eventually, Dean passed out on Sam's bed, but for the next two days, things felt more normal between them. They were careful not to fight, but there was no longer any anger between them. Even from the limited amount of time Dean spent with Sam and Julie, he could tell that they were moving on, for his sake.

So, things should have been okay. They should have been able to move on. Sam and Dean had, and so had Sam and Julie. But the thing was…those relationships had been saved because both sides wanted to save them.

Dean was really starting to act like he didn't want to save his and Julie's relationship.

Dean holed himself up in his room for hours on end. He spoke to Julie only when required to and rarely actually met her gaze. He was almost always in some state of drunkenness, and twice as surly as usual. At first, Julie had believed it was because of what had been going on with Sam and Julie and what he had seen in that other dream world. But then, when he forgave Sam, it became clear that this wasn't really about Sam.

It was about her. And she was tired of waiting for him to tell her what she did wrong. So a week after the djinn incident, Julie found them a pretty simple, easy haunting in Louisiana, and the three hunters drove to Louisiana, Dean blasting Metallica's "Enter Sandman" for four straight hours so he didn't have to talk to Julie. They solved the case within twenty-four hours of driving into the small town, but it hadn't helped their relationship like she had hoped. So after they returned to the morel, Julie barged into Dean's adjoining motel room and glared at him.

Dean was sitting on his motel bed, calmly flipping through a book of demon lore they had brought with them. He barely glanced up when she shut the door behind her.

"Look at me, Dean," Julie snapped, and he sighed and got off the bed, crossing his arms and turning to face her.

For a second, she was a little intimidated. He was wearing a black Led Zeppelin t-shirt, and with his arms crossed, his muscles were bulging almost threateningly. He was significantly taller than her, and the fact that he could look down on her pissed her off for no apparent reason.

"What's going on with you?" Julie snapped. "You've barely done more than grunt at me for a week, you just sit in your room on a never-ending hangover. What's wrong?"

"What's-?" Dean started in disbelief. Then he smirked and shook his head. "Did you miss the part where my brother and my girlfriend fell in love with each other? Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I consider that a pretty valid excuse for not wanting to be with you two twenty-four-seven."

"Oh, get over yourself, Dean," Julie snapped. "We've been doing everything we can this past week to move on and prove to you that nothing's going on. And I know that you're not still mad about that, because you forgave Sam two days ago. So I guess the better question is what the hell did I do to make you so mad?"

"You kissed my brother," he pointed out.

"That wasn't the same Sam out there," she replied. "That Sam was my husband, and he was in pain, and I was…confused. But believe me, I have it under control now. That won't be happening again, so if that's all you're worried about…"

"That's not just it," Dean sighed, some of the fight going out of him.

Julie realized they might actually be about to get somewhere. "Okay. Then what? What did I do? Tell me, so I can fix it!"

"You didn't…you didn't do anything," Dean sighed, rubbing his eyes in the way he did when he was so weary he was just done. "I…"

He stopped suddenly, and Julie was frustrated. He had been about to say something, something important, she could tell. "What? _What_, Dean?!" she snapped. "God, what is _wrong_? I can't live like this anymore, you hiding away from me and not so much as looking at me."

"So go," he muttered, and that answer came far too quickly. Almost like he'd been thinking it for a while.

"…What?" Julie said slowly.

Dean looked at the floor, his expression unreadable. "Dean, what the hell?" she cried. "Do you really want me to go? Do you not even want me here anymore?!"

"I just…" Dean swallowed and then steeled himself. "I don't know, Julie," he said, meeting her eyes. His expression was so hard she was a little scared. "I mean, do you really belong here with us? We're the Winchester's, after all. We don't really need your help. And if you're just going to cause us more trouble…"

Julie stared at him, mouth hanging open. "Oh my god," she said coldly after a long moment.

She turned away, unable to look at him anymore. She was so angry, and so hurt, and there were tears welling up in her eyes, and that asshole, that asshole that she was so desperately in love with did not get to see her cry. "I'm going to go take a walk," she said flatly before storming out of the motel.

Dean sighed sadly as she fled. He sat back down on the bed and put his head in his hands, digging his palms into his eyes like that could force the tears away. Hurting Julie was literally the last thing he wanted to do, but being with Dean wasn't safe. The more time she spent with him, the more likely she was to get hurt. And his worst fear was that she would get hurt so bad he couldn't save her. If he had to choose between hurting her to send her away and watching Julie die…the choice was obvious.

But it sure as hell wasn't easy. Dean got his emotions back in check enough to lift his head and reach for another bottle.

* * *

><p>Julie pulled her jacket tighter around her. She had been walking for nearly half an hour, and the tears had dried half a mile back. Now she was just pissed. At first, she had been hurt that Dean wanted her to go, but that had soon passed once she cried a little. Now she was mentally raging on the stuck-up bastard who was stupid enough to think he could make it without her after she had put him back together.<p>

Even that, she knew, wasn't true though. Although she was mentally waging war on Dean, she wasn't really truly mad at him. Because she knew Dean well enough to know he'd never do anything as drastic as send Julie away out of selfish reasons. And he surely didn't really want her gone. Somehow, in his twisted way of thinking, he probably thought he was protecting her or something by wanting her to leave.

Well then, he could get off his high horse and realize that she didn't need him to protect her. She may not be a Winchester, but she could still kick ass and take names. And she was not going anywhere anytime soon.

Julie slowed as she realized another figure was walking the opposite direction down the path towards her. It was getting a little late for people to be walking around in the woods, and this place was in the middle of nowhere. That was suspicious enough, and then she got closer to the figure approaching and got a good look at her.

She was one of those unfairly sexy women you couldn't really compete with. She had long, thick, sleek black hair which seemed to somehow always look like it came straight out of a magazine despite the wind blowing Julie's curls around. She had smooth tan skin, big, heavily made-up, dark eyes, a pretty face, and a very curvy body made obvious by the low-cut tank top and tight jeans she wore. No one looked this great just to walk alone on the edge of an empty highway, and there was something about this woman's very presence that exuded darkness.

The woman smiled as she reached Julie. "What brings you out here, sweetie?" she asked innocently.

"I live in the neighborhood," Julie said airily, casually reaching behind her for the angel blade tucked into her waist band. "Just taking a walk."

"I think you're lying to me," the beautiful woman said, and Julie stiffened. "Believe me, I would know; I practically invented lying. I think you're Dean Winchester's little bitch."

Julie suddenly lunged forward and drove the angel blade hilt deep into the woman's stomach. She frowned and looked down, mildly annoyed. "Now that was uncalled for," she said reprovingly. "We were just talking!"

Julie was in so far over her head. She gulped and scrambled away from this powerful…whatever she was. And Julie had a pretty good idea who she was, even before the woman pulled the knife out of her and grinned nastily at Julie, eyes flashing pure black.

"Apollyon?" Julie guessed, trying not to panic. So she was alone with a Knight of Hell and unable to fight her. So what? Sam and Dean knew where she was.

Except…they didn't. And Sam had tried to stop her from going out, but she had told him not to follow. And Dean sure as hell wouldn't be following her.

"You did your homework…Juliet Carters?" Apollyon smirked.

"It's Julie, actually," she said as cockily as she could.

The Knight laughed. "I like you, darling. And you're quite a looker yourself. I mean, you're no Miranda—this meat suit, that is—but you'll do. Especially with the influence you've got on those _sexy _Winchesters…"

"I don't know what you're talking about, but I sure as hell am not going to be your meat suit," Julie snarled, slowly backing away.

"See, that's the nice thing about being a demon versus an angel," Apollyon sighed, stretching and cracking her knuckles. "We don't have to ask nicely—we can _take _what we want."

Julie turned to run, but the demoness was right in front of her, grinning. The Knight hit her so hard and fast that Julie fell to the ground, stunned. In the next second, the demon was pinning her down, laughing as she pulled a long silver knife out of her boot.

Julie gritted her teeth and struggled wildly against the Knight. But she couldn't get her arms or legs free, so she finally just head-butted the demoness as hard as she could.

Apollyon laughed again. "Oh, I _really _like you! This is going to be fun!"

The demon's eyes roamed over Julie's body. "Now where's this tattoo of yours? Please tell me it's not on your ass, because that's going to be a little unpleasant for both of us."

Julie glared defiantly at the Knight. "Fine," Apollyon shrugged. "Don't get the wrong idea when I start making you strip."

The demoness lifted Julie's shirt up to her ribcage as the hunter struggled as wildly as she could. Apollyon forced Julie onto her back and smirked, spotting the tattoo on her back. "Bingo."

Julie forced herself not to gasp as the cold metal tip of the knife traced along the skin of her lower back. Then Apollyon slowly made a cut in her skin, breaking the anti-possession sigil. Julie gritted her teeth, refusing to show weakness.

"Say aah," Apollyon smirked, and then smoke poured out of her mouth and into Julie.

The sexy woman who had been possessed by Apollyon fell to the side, and for a moment the two women lay still and facedown on the grass. Then suddenly Julie sat straight up and got to her feet. She stretched and moved her hands and feet experimentally.

Then she turned towards the direction of the town where Sam and Dean were sitting, unaware of the danger coming for them, and grinned. "Oh, _boys_…" she smirked as her eyes flashed black as night.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen**

Sam pulled on his jacket and stuck his head inside Dean's room for a moment to let his brother know he was going out. Ever since Julie had stormed out after her fight with Dean, Sam had been bouncing around the motel room, full of nervous energy and the need to do _something _so he could make two of the people he cared about most happy again. He needed to walk around, clear his head, calm down, and tell himself that things were going to be okay.

Sam left the motel and walked through the nearly deserted parking lot. There was practically no one staying in this crap hole of a motel, but it was dirt cheap, so the three of them didn't mind too much. Considering they'd slept on the ground or even in cells, this place was pretty nice for them.

Sam stopped walking when Julie came around the corner of the motel. She looked surprisingly calm for having stormed off nearly an hour ago, near tears. Sam noticed how her shirt was unbuttoned enough to show off her cleavage, and then quickly glanced away. Although lately it had been a lot easier to shut down his dark thoughts, staring at her breasts sure wasn't going to help.

"Hey, Julie," he said carefully. "Are you…?"

"I'm okay, Sam," she said, stopping a few inches away from him. He gave her a skeptical look, but she insisted, "No, really! If Dean wants to be a jackass, fine. Who needs him?"

Sam swallowed. This was not what he wanted to hear. He wanted Julie to say that she loved Dean, and for him to say it back, and they could go back to those happy days when the three of them first started living together, before everything got so messed up.

"Julie…" Sam started.

"Please, don't," she said, and Sam looked down, surprised, as she put her hand on his arm. "Don't tell me that I should just give him another chance and try to make up. Why should I? He doesn't treat me like he should." Sam realized that she was moving closer to him, her hand sliding from his arm to his shoulder to rest on his chest, right above his pounding heart. "Like I know you would," she whispered.

"Julie…I…" Sam couldn't think. What was happening? Julie would never do anything like this! But who cared? Hadn't this been his most secret fantasy for weeks? To have Julie stretching up towards him, eyes closing, about to kiss him…

Sam suddenly pushed Julie away from him, and she blinked, surprised and a little hurt. "Julie, what the hell are you doing?" he snapped, pushing his hair out of his face, shaken.

"I was just…" She took a deep breath. "He's not the right one for me, Sam. I know it, and you know it, too. _You _are-"

"Stop it!" Sam snapped, breathing heavily. "This isn't you talking, Julie."

"Who else would it be?"

"I don't know—you're drunk, you're upset…you're not you!" Sam cried. "Look, we can't do this. I'm not the one you love. That's Dean."

"He doesn't even want me anymore-" Julie protested.

"Bullshit," he snapped. "My brother is so crazy about you, it's probably not even healthy for him. And I'm sure as hell not going to screw it up. Not again. Just…go in there and talk to him. Please. Fix this."

"But, Sam-" she tried again.

"I need to clear my head," Sam said shortly before striding quickly away.

He got a couple blocks away before he realized he had done it. He had resisted Julie, sent her back to Dean, done the right thing. And it had been so long since Sam had done what he knew was the right thing that, even with all this drama going on, Sam found himself smiling.

Apollyon watched Sam walk away, pissed. Men didn't just turn her down. That never happened. The fact that Sam had resisted her, especially in the body of a woman he had once had feelings for, or maybe still did…he must really love his brother a lot.

"Fine," Apollyon muttered through Julie's lips. "Dean, it's your turn."

* * *

><p>Dean was hunched over the table in his room, trying to read the slightly blurry words of some book of demon lore when his phone rang. He glanced over and saw a picture of him and Julie, grinning, arms around each other. Happy and in love.<p>

He wasn't sure if he should be relieved or not. Julie had been gone an hour, and the fact that she was calling instead of just coming inside was probably not a good sign…

He picked up and asked, "Julie?"

"Hey, Dean." She was silent for a moment. "Look…could you come outside?" she asked a little nervously after a heavy silence.

Dean frowned. "Why?"

"I want to…to try that again," she said carefully. "Look, Dean…can we please just go somewhere and talk? And I mean really talk. I need to know what you're thinking. I need to…talk to you."

"And we can't do that here?" he asked reluctantly.

"I'd kind of like to get away from Sam for a bit," she admitted. "I mean, he's been really great about this whole thing, but…I'd rather it just be you and me. You know, like it used to be? When we were…"

Happy. When they were happy, and Dean would come home and pick her up and kiss her so long and hard they were both light-headed. When they would lay on a picnic blanket in their backyard, grilling out with friends. When they would have sex in their big, warm bed and then eat food in bed and laugh and kiss. Before Sam came along and everything changed.

But this wasn't all Sam's fault. He could forgive her for that whole mess and move on, he knew he could. But if Julie got hurt because of him…that was something that he could never move on from.

"Sure," Dean sighed after a moment before hanging up. He had to end this, he knew he did. But he could not bear to send her away or see any amount of pain on her face. He couldn't do that to her, his Jules.

Dean pulled on a green jacket and considered downing another beer so he could get through this, but he knew if he saw her face when his mind was addled he would give in and kiss her and refuse to let her go.

Dean left the motel and saw Julie standing in the parking lot a few feet away from the door, waiting slightly impatiently. Her expression changed to something unreadable when she saw him, and Dean walked cautiously over to her. "Hey," he said after a long moment.

"Hey," she said softly, staring up at him. There was so much longing and lust in her eyes, and it was so clear she wanted him. She wanted him to grab her and kiss her and haul her into the motel room for some pretty friggin' fantastic makeup sex. But he couldn't. Not if he wanted this to end in something other than her death.

"Look, Jules…" he started weakly, but she stepped closer to him and shook her head.

"Shut up and kiss me," she whispered, and then she grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him in.

It was nothing like one of their normal kisses. She practically forced her tongue inside his mouth and then bit his lip a little too hard. Her hands grabbed at him, dragging him closer to her, holding him there. And although it wasn't like their other sweet, tender kisses, he was still getting pretty turned on. Despite all his resolve, Dean's hands started to slide up under Julie's shirt and up her back.

But as he did so, Dean felt something warm and wet on her skin. He pulled away from her and stared at the blood on his hands. "Julie, you're bleeding!" he said, turning her gently around to inspect the cut.

Then his blood ran cold. Because the tattoo protecting her from demon possession was broken.

Dean reached for a weapon, but Julie, or whatever else this was inside her, held up the gun he kept in his waistband teasingly. "Surprise!" she smirked, her eyes suddenly flashing entirely black.

"Get out of her, you son of a bitch," Dean growled.

"Make me," the demon taunted, and it was positively horrifying feeling all this hatred directed at a thing that looked and talked like the woman he loved. "No, really. Try and make me, Dean Winchester. That was some pretty good kissing, but you can do better I bet."

Dean wanted to lunge at the demon inside Julie, but for some reason his vision was going a little blurry and he felt woozy. "What…did you do?" he moaned, trying to stay on his feet.

"A little knockout drug on the lips is all," she smirked as he fell to his knees. Beautiful Julie Carters stepped forward and ran a hand through his hair, stroking his jaw teasingly as Dean slowly lost consciousness. Normally, her touch would feel so good, but this…wasn't her…

"So nice to finally meet you, Dean," Julie said softly. "I've been dying for us to meet. I'm Apollyon, and I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot of each other very soon."

If she said more, Dean would never know. He finally slipped into unconsciousness and slumped facedown on the ground, out cold.

* * *

><p>Dean woke up with a pretty bad headache and dry mouth. He tried to move his arm to massage his forehead, and found himself held in a standing position, arms spread wide by two chains that held him up. He tried for a few seconds to pull the chains down, but it was useless. He was trapped in whatever dark barn he had found himself in.<p>

Next he noticed Julie—no, not Julie, that Knight of Hell, Apollyon—standing a few feet away, watching him. She smirked slightly when their eyes met and shook her head.

"Nice to see you finally awake, princess," she smirked. "I swear, if you were out much longer I would have gotten bored and started without you."

Dean didn't like any of what she was implying, and he sure as hell did not like seeing a Knight of Hell inside the woman he loved. "Alright, bitch," he groaned. "Cut it out. We can settle this however you want, just get out of that woman."

"Now, why would I do that?" Apollyon laughed. "I'm quite enjoying this body." Dean noticed she had Julie's shirt un-buttoned farther than Julie ever wore it, so her ample cleavage was practically popping out. The demoness circled ever closer to Dean as she talked. "She's quite sexy, Dean. But you know that. Bet you were banging this girl every night." The Knight stopped in front of him and smiled seductively. "What do you say you and me do it right now? I won't tell Julie."

She laughed, and Dean glared at her. "What?" Julie—no, Apollyon pouted. "It's the same body! And believe me, over the centuries I picked up some tricks I bet she's never shown you. I'd give you the time of your life."

"Go to hell," Dean snarled.

"I'm on a slight vacation away right now," she smirked. "So I take it that's a no? Your loss, gorgeous."

"I'm assuming you didn't bring me here just to do me," Dean snapped, rolling his eyes.

"No, I actually brought you here to ask you some questions about this lovely little Mark on you arm." His girlfriend moved closer to him and traced the inside of his arm, where the Mark was burned into his flesh. Dean closed his eyes and gritted his teeth as she pressed down on the inflamed flesh and it glowed slightly, angered by her presence. For a second, all he could think of was snapping these chains and driving the First Blade into this bitch's heart again and again…

But she was inside Julie. To kill Apollyon he would have to kill Julie, and that absolutely was not happening.

"So, it still bothers you, huh?" she asked, watching his expression. Dean opened his eyes again to glare at the demon. "Bet you want to kill me right now, don't you, Dean? Want to snap my pretty little neck?"

"Well, obviously I can't," he snarled. "I think you would know if I had the First Blade on me."

"That's right," she sighed. "You're not using it. Now, why is that? Frankly, it's stupid of you. There's five of us, and only one of you, and you're the only being alive capable of killing us, yet you refuse to? I'd almost say you're on our side!"

"I'd die first," Dean snarled.

"And you just might," Apollyon admitted. "I'm technically supposed to bring you straight to my lord and king and pompous big brother, Beelzebub, but you see, I've got a little score to settle with you, Dean." She whipped out a small, delicate knife meant for carving and forced Dean to lift his chin to look at her with it. All Dean saw was the beautiful woman he loved, and he was torn between aching to save her and wanting to kill her. "You killed my sister," Apollyon said darkly.

"Right," Dean muttered. "I had almost forgotten. She went like a bitch, you know. Kind of pathetic. All that talk about Knights of Hell, and then a puny human took her down."

Julie snarled at him and hit him so hard his ears rang. Then Julie—no, Apollyon grabbed his chin and forced him to look at her.

"I don't care about anyone," the Knight of Hell snarled. "I haven't in thousands of years. But the person I hated the least was my sister, Abbadon, and you slaughtered her. So now, before I hand you over to the true masters of torture, I'm going to have a little fun myself."

Apollyon made a small cut along Dean's cheekbone, and he flinched but didn't cry out. Smirking with cruel enjoyment, the demon tore his t-shirt open and traced the tip of the knife over his skin, teasingly tracing the anti-possession tattoo on his chest.

"You know, if it weren't for Beelzebub's little obsession with you, I might possess you myself," Apollyon said thoughtfully. "With a face and a body like yours… god, the women must just fall at your feet. Once I'm done with you though, I doubt you'll even be recognizable."

She slashed his arm, and Dean cried out through gritted teeth as his blood dripped onto the floor. His hard green eyes met hers and he spat on her cheek.

Apollyon took her time wiping Julie's face clean. Then her blue eyes hardened as she said, "Damn, Winchester. You really are as dumb as you look."

Filled with a new fury, the demoness tore into him, punching and kicking and cutting until Dean's face was bloody and his whole upper body either red with blood or black and blue.

The worst part wasn't even the pain, though. The worst part was that it was Julie's face twisted in hatred and glee, her hands hitting him in the gut again and again until he tasted blood, her carving him up with that knife.

After a while, Apollyon threw down her bloody knife and forced Dean to lift his head by his hair. "You're pathetic," she snarled. "And that's not me talking, you know. This is all Ms. Julie Carters. This is all her. You have no idea how long she's wanted to take this all out on you, Dean. How she's dreamed of this."

Dean shook his head. "You're lying," he groaned.

"Why would I?" Apollyon smirked. "We both know she hasn't loved you in weeks, if she ever did. It's Sam now, and it has been for a while. But you know that, don't you? That's why you two were fighting. That's why I was able to get inside your pretty little girlfriend, because you just had to fight with her and hurt her, didn't you, Dean?"

"Shut up, bitch," he growled. "You've got no idea what you're talking about."

"I'm the one inside her head, Dean," Apollyon reminded him. "It took her a while, but she finally realized how stupid she was for being with you when she could just have Sam. I mean, _come on_, Dean! Just look at Sam. He's smart and charming and handsome and kind…better than you in every way. You've always known that. So why would you believe any woman could love you when there was Sam to choose instead?"

"Stop it," he said, because hearing these words out of Julie's mouth was really getting under his skin.

"And you know what she thinks of _you_, Dean?" Apollyon snarled, bending slightly to be level with him. "Do you know what _I_ think?" And now she was speaking as Julie, or at least pretending to. "I think you're pathetic. I think you're a pathetic, stupid, self-hating grunt. You're the soldier, Dean. You take the fall so the real heroes like Sam can get the glory and the girl. So get out of the way, why don't you?"

Dean closed his eyes, trying to block her out, but her words were working their way inside him. And those awful words, his deepest, darkest thoughts and fears coupled with the torture he was enduring was all too much. And then there was the issue of Julie being possessed by a Knight of Hell, Julie in danger just to mess with him.

"Talk to my brother like that again, bitch," a man's low voice snarled, and Dean's eyes flew open just in time to see Sam douse Julie in holy water.

She screamed in agony and fell to the ground, wailing. Immediately, Sam launched into a rapid-fire exorcism as Julie twitched and moaned. Dean was confused, though. Exorcisms didn't work, not on Knights of Hell. All they would do was weaken the Knight, not expel her.

However, when the person she was possessing was as tough and pissed as Julie, there was no way a weakened Knight could keep in control.

After a few agonizing seconds, Apollyon suddenly smoked out of her meat suit, leaving a gasping, shuddering, weak Julie. Sam helped her to her feet, asking her half a dozen times if she was alright.

"I'm…I'm okay, Sam," Julie gasped, pushing her wet curls out of her face. Then her eyes landed on Dean, dangling weak and beaten and bloody from those chains, and her stomach turned. "Dean…" she breathed, and Sam immediately rushed to help Dean get free.

Julie however, was frozen in horror as she relived the past hour or so. She felt her hands and her knife tearing into Dean, heard herself saying those awful things to him, watched him break all over again. She was so overwhelmed and horrified she thought she might burst into tears or puke.

Sam got Dean free and forced his own jacket onto his battered older brother. Dean lifted his eyes and met Julie's for a moment, and her heart sank at the blank, distant stare he gave her.

"We need to get out of here," Sam said. "This place is only a couple miles outside of town, and I've got the Impala still running, but that bitch could be back any second."

Sam helped Dean walk towards the door to the barn while Julie followed them in a daze. But, as they threw the door open to leave, the same sexy woman Apollyon had been possessing appeared out of nowhere and lunged straight at Dean, wielding a knife.

Sam and Dean were too shocked to move, but thankfully, Julie wasn't. She threw her arm protectively in front of Dean, and Apollyon's knife cut a gash in her arm. Julie cried out in pain, but she had given Sam enough time to get out the makeshift flamethrower he had brought, and he set Apollyon on fire like he had her sister a couple years ago.

The demon shrieked in agony before smoking out of her dead meat suit. Sam put an arm around Julie and Dean and rushed them to the Impala. Dean got shakily into the passenger seat, while Sam pulled off his button-down shirt and wrapped it around Julie's heavily bleeding arm, leaving himself in a t-shirt. She assured him that she would be okay and got into the back of the car, and Sam sped back to the motel as quickly as he could, trying to ignore how his wounded passengers gritted their teeth to keep from crying out whenever he hit a bump in the road.

It wasn't until they were all safely inside the motel that Sam really stopped to think about what had just happened. He had been suspicious about what had been going on with Julie, and when he returned to the motel after a couple of hours to find Dean missing, he went looking for them. Soon, he had found an abandoned barn and broke in to find what appeared to be Julie torturing Dean. Pretty quickly, it became apparent to him what was really happening, and he was able to swoop in and save them both.

But now, as the three of them stood just inside the crappy motel room, still catching their breath, Sam slowly began to realize with horror what all had happened and what damage had been caused.

Julie almost dying had been rough on their relationship. Sam having feelings for Julie had almost blown the whole thing to pieces. But now…this incident, if anything, was going to be the thing that destroyed Dean and Julie's happy relationship once and for all.

They may be safe from Knights of Hell, but the trouble was nowhere near over.

* * *

><p>Sam finished tying off the bandage on Julie's arm and stepped back. "There," he sighed, exhausted. "You should be all good."<p>

Julie moved her arm around experimentally. Her arm still hurt, but it could have been a hell of a lot worse. She could have bled out, or been cut somewhere other than her arm. She could have not moved in time and Dean would be dead.

Julie could not think of a single thing to say. Her skin was still crawling with revulsion. She had been possessed by a Knight of Hell, and she had been forced to torture and lie to the man she loved. She had hurt Dean, and not just physically. Yes, it was her hands that had cut into him and hit him again and again. But that she could almost bear. It was the pained, hopeless, broken look she had seen on his face as he heard those lies and believed her. He really had believed that demon when she said Julie had never loved him, and that he wasn't good enough for her.

How could he believe that, after all they'd been through, after all she'd done for him? After all those nights together, after literally hundreds of I love you's…how dare he believe she would leave him for Sam?!

Julie wanted to go into the adjoining room and chew him out. She wanted to bitch at him, knock some sense into that man. She wanted to rage at him for all the crap he'd been giving her, all the fights and sulky silences and cold nights alone in separate beds, for that little scoff he made every time she said something about loving him lately. He just didn't believe her anymore. Couldn't believe her. Just because she and his little brother had chemistry? After all they'd been through? No! No, that was not how this was going to work. She and Dean would fix this, and they would go back to those sunny days of happiness when they first fell in love. Where had those perfect days gone?

It didn't really matter when or where they'd gone. They were gone, and they weren't going to come back. Dean had watched her almost die one too many times, she and Sam had hugged or talked without Dean one too many times, and that happy, easy relationship was gone, for good. She should accept that and walk in there and break up with Dean before he dumped her like every other girl once he was done with her.

But the thought of ending this was literally hell to her. Julie loved him still, and probably always would. She didn't want this to end. She wanted to go in there and apologize for what Apollyon had made her say and stitch up his wounds and kiss him like she had once, a year or so ago, in a barn that smelled of sweat and sawdust, and they could begin again.

"Sam…" Julie said after a moment. "About that thing outside the motel, when I was possessed…"

Sam looked down. "Look, Julie, it wasn't you. I get that."

She touched his arm again, but there was something different this time. This was a comforting, grateful touch, nothing like the way she had touched him before, like she wanted him. Now, she was thanking him. And _this _was his Julie, not that other woman outside the motel.

"Thank you," she said gently. "For…not giving in to her…to me. Just…thanks."

Sam couldn't quite meet her eyes. So instead, he said, "Go talk to him. I'll find some way to kill time. Just…if you're going to screw each other, at least keep it in his bed."

Despite herself, Julie snorted. "Sam, look…"

"Don't worry about me," Sam said in a firm, serious tone. "I'll admit, there were times when I kind of wanted you two to fight, but…this is hell. Go fix this so things can be the way they were before."

Julie nodded gratefully at him as he left the motel. Then she took a deep, calming breath and knocked on Dean's door.

There was a grunt of pain. "Come in," his low voice growled. Not very welcoming, but she walked in anyway.

First aid supplies were strewn all over the coffee table. There was blood in the sink, and his blood-stained, tattered t-shirt was in the trash can. Dean wore a clean black tee, and white bandages poked out from under the sleeves, like hers did. His face looked a lot better, but still bruised and pained.

His screams of pain hit her ears all over again, and she felt like she might puke. For a second, she was digging a knife into his ribs again, his blood on her hands, and she was enjoying it…

Julie looked down at the floor until the tears went away. She had done this to him. And that was far worse than any demon bitch torturing Dean. Because she had felt him flinch and bleed and break under her hands, and that was never going to leave her.

At least he looked better now. Judging by the empty beer bottles and burger wrapper nearby, he was fed and watered. He met her eyes, his weary and dark and not at all welcoming.

"We could have helped, you know," she said after a moment, glancing at the first aid supplies strewn around him.

"I'm a big boy now, Julie," he muttered sarcastically. "I can take care of myself."

There was a beat. Julie wanted to snap at him, "Right, because you were doing such a good job of that when I met you!" But she couldn't, because she had to save this relationship, not make it worse.

"What do you want, Julie?" Dean asked. Not rudely, necessarily, like he wanted to know but was afraid of the answer.

"Dean, I wanted to…I just want to say, I am so, so sorry," Julie said guiltily.

"It's not your fault," he sighed, looking down.

"It doesn't matter. I hurt you, and I never wanted to hurt you. I don't care if I'm possessed or pissed at you or…confused. I never meant to hurt you."

He smirked bitterly. "Thanks for that."

Julie's temper flared, but she held her tongue. "I mean it. You know I never meant that to happen, but you have to know…what Apollyon said…none of that was true."

"Demons can read the minds of the people they're riding," Dean pointed out darkly.

"And they also _lie,_ Dean!"

"Unless they know the truth will hurt." They locked eyes and glared at each other for a moment.

"Dean Winchester," Julie said slowly. "In all the time I've known you, I've never done anything but care about you. I have never done anything but love you, and you know that."

"Except for love my brother," he muttered, turning away slightly.

"You know what? You're right," Julie snapped, and he looked up, surprised. "I do love Sam. And Cas, and anyone else in your life—hell, I even tolerate Crowley because he's part of your life. You care about them—Sam and Cas at least—a lot, and so I do too. Because I love you."

"Right," he muttered, looking away again.

And that finally made her snap. His little contemptuous, disbelieving "right." If this was going to end, it would not be because he didn't believe she loved him.

"That's it," Julie snapped. "Look at me, Dean, and you listen to what I'm going to say. You can snort and roll your eyes at me. You can fight with me and sleep on the couch for the rest of your life and keep on living in your delusional world where I love your brother more than you. You can keep on carrying on like the pig-headed jackass you're being, and it doesn't matter, because I will still love you."

Dean's face hardened. "Right, because I'm feeling so loved right now."

"You're a big boy, Dean" she retorted. "I'm not gonna sugarcoat to spare your precious feelings. I am so tired of you not believing me when I say I love you. I don't know what makes you believe you don't deserve to be loved, if it's because Dad and everybody else always loved Sam better or what-"

"Drop it," Dean growled.

"But you need to hear this!" Julie snapped. "Dean, Sam is a good man. You know it, and I know it. And you know who raised him to be that way? You. You're every bit the man Sam is, and you need to stop hating yourself so much and realize that _you_ _deserve to be loved_. Sure, you made some mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes, but they're just mistakes."

"Yeah, but does everybody break down in hell and start torturing people? Does everyone let down all the people who have ever loved them? Does everyone start the friggin' apocalypse?" Dean's eyes were so filled with pain Julie wanted to hold him, but they had to finish this.

"You stopped it, too," she said quietly.

"No, Sam did."

"He couldn't have without you, and you know it."

Dean shook his head. "You know, Julie, I'm not a good guy like you think I am," he said darkly. "I try to be, but everything I touch is _ruined_. I fail everybody, and they end up dying because of it. So maybe the problem isn't really that I don't believe you love me, or that I don't think I can be loved; maybe it's just that I know what happens to the people who do love me, and I can't let that happen to you."

Julie stared at him, stunned. This was it. This hadn't been about Sam for a while now, and they both knew it. This was the real reason Dean hadn't been trying to save their relationship, wasn't it? Because he was trying, in his own twisted way, to save her…

"Dean…" Julie said softly, hating how her eyes were beginning to sting with tears.

"You know what happens to people who care about me, Jules?" Dean's voice wasn't hard, it was hurting. "Do you know where they are? They're rotting in the ground."

"Sam and Cas-"

"Have both died, _repeatedly_, because of me," Dean snapped. "I can't even tell you how many times I've failed to save Sammy, how many times I've had to watch my brother die. And Cas? He fell from grace to help me, Julie, and he _died _because of me. My dad? He sold his soul and went to hell because I was dying. Bobby? Died helping me. Kevin? My mess. Ellen, Jo, Ash, Rufus, Pamela…" His voice was cracking and he was breaking down. "I've watched too many people die for me. I've buried too many loved ones. I'm not burying you."

"It doesn't have to be like that, Dean," Julie whispered.

"You're right," he said, breathing heavily. "Because you're going to get out."

"What?" she asked, stunned and hurt.

"Look at today, Jules!" Dean yelled. "A Knight of Hell possessed you just to get to me, and then you almost died trying to protect me. You got hurt. And I swear to god, that will _not _happen again." He took a step towards her, almost threateningly. "Which is why you're going to leave. You're going to go home and you're going to escape me."

There was so much pain in his eyes, but Julie as certain there was more in hers. She said slowly and firmly, "No."

Dean blinked. "What?"

"Dean, no! I don't want to leave you! I _love _you, for god's sake! How many times do I have to say that to get it through your thick head? I'm not leaving you-"

"What if I don't want you here?"

There was silence. Julie's heart was pounding so hard she thought it might burst. "Dean…do you really…?" she asked, hurt. They stared at each other for a small eternity. "Fine. If you can look me in the eye and say that you don't want me here with you, that you want me to leave, I'm gone."

Dean steeled himself. Those green eyes burned into hers, and for a second they were so heartbreakingly sad. And then he said slowly and calmly, "I want you to go home, Julie. I want you to leave me."

And her heart stopped.

Julie couldn't move, at least not until she turned away because she didn't want him to see her cry. "Alright then. I'll get my stuff," she said, proud of how level her voice was.

And she walked out of the room to gather all of her clothes and personal belongings into a large duffel bag. She walked back into Dean's room to say goodbye, and for a second before he realized she was there, he was a man burning on the stake, tortured and broken, looking on the verge of losing control. But then he realized she was there and went cold again. "I just want you to know, Dean," Julie said as calmly as she could. "No matter what happened, ever since I've known you, I've loved you. I never quit loving you, not even for a second, so don't you dare think that I don't."

They stared at each other, but neither could say goodbye. So Julie walked out of the motel to the extra car they had rented.

Sam had chosen that second to risk returning to the motel room. He stopped when he saw Julie walking towards the spare car, head down, and when he realized she was crying, he ran over to her. "Julie? Julie, what happened? What's wrong? Julie, where are you going?!" he cried, finally grabbing her arm and stopping her.

She turned to look at him, and whispered brokenly, "I'm leaving, Sam. I'm going home."

"What?" Sam cried, panicked. "Does…does Dean-?"

"He's the one who wants me to go," she said flatly.

"I…but…Julie, please tell me you're not serious!"

"He is," Julie muttered, throwing her bag into the car and wiping her eyes. "I have to go, Sam."

"No," he breathed. "Julie, wait! Please. I don't understand. Why would he send you away? He loves you! He needs you. We both do."

And Sam looked like he was burning on the stake, too, although not nearly as badly as Dean had been. She felt like she was being cut again by Apollyon's knife, but it was much worse. "Sam…I'm sorry," Julie said softly. "I wish it didn't have to be like this. God, I wish that."

"Please…" he begged, but they both knew it was pointless. He sighed. "You were at least going to say goodbye, right?"

Julie smiled through a film of tears. "Bye, Sam."

He crushed her in a hug so tight she could barely breathe. Julie buried her face in Sam's shoulder, trying her best not to sob. Why did it have to end like this?! It couldn't! After all she and these two brothers had gone through, two of the people she loved most…it could not end like this.

"Don't go," Sam whispered in her ear.

Julie finally sobbed.

They pulled apart after a long moment. Julie gave Sam a watery smile. "If you and Dean ever need anything, anything at all, you call me. Make sure he knows that, too."

Sam nodded. "Take care of yourself," he told her.

"You too," she replied. "And take care of him, too."

Finally, there was nothing left to say. Julie surprised herself by stretching up on her tiptoes and kissing Sam on the cheek. "I'll see you, Sam," she whispered.

"You will," he said firmly, refusing to accept that this was goodbye.

And Julie got into the car and drove away. Sam stood alone in the dark, watching her go, his insides boiling. He wasn't sure if he was pissed at or sad for Dean. All he knew was he wanted Julie back. But he knew where Dean was coming from, too. She was safer away from them, and he could not bear to see her dead because of them.

Julie got a couple miles away before she finally lost it. She pulled over on the side of the road, turned the car off, and put her head in her hands and sobbed. Out of all the ways that this could have gone, this was the last one she had expected.

There were still so many things left to say to Dean. So many more kisses and embraces and nights together. So many happy moments, so many fights and birthdays and hunts left to have together. This could not be the end. She could not bear the thought of never being with Dean again.

And as for Dean…he stood alone in his motel room, watching Julie and Sam say goodbye. He watched them comfort each other, watched Sam hug his girlfriend… no, his ex. He watched Julie kiss Sam on the cheek and then drive away. He hadn't gotten a last kiss from her. But then again, he had sent her away.

There was so much left he had to say to her. He had to run after her and make her stop the car and tell her he knew that she loved him. He knew that she would never try to hurt him, and Dean would tell Julie he loved her, more than he had ever loved anyone. He would tell her he couldn't do this without her, beg her to stay, and they would kiss and then they would finally sleep in the same bed again, and they could be happy again. She would make him whole. They would be able to get through all of this Knight stuff because they had each other.

But instead, Dean let her go. He would face this Knight drama alone, just him and Sam, and she would go back to her family, and she would be safe. She would leave. And over time, she would get over him. She would move on and find another man, a better man, and they could be happy and actually have a life together.

Because Julie was not his to keep. She deserved a life, and Dean could not give her one. He had done the right thing, he knew it. But then why was it so hard?

Dean reached for a hunter's oldest friend: a bottle. He leaned against the wall and drank and drank, wanting to cry, but far too sad and empty to muster a tear.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty**

Jasper glanced to his daughter for help as he risked knocking on Julie's door. Since they had returned from a vampire hunt last night, she hadn't left that room. Julie rarely came out except for meals or to go on another hunt. Jasper knew his niece as well as he did his own daughter, and normally being on a case, having something to do always distracted her and cheered her up.

Not this time, though. For these past two weeks, Julie Carters had been a different woman than the one he had raised. She was quieter, moodier, and angrier at everything and everyone. She sat in that room, blasting classic rock angrily through her speakers, reading or watching television or drinking. Julie had never been a very big drinker, and she rarely actually got drunk, but he'd seen her hung over five times in the past two weeks.

Jasper was concerned about Julie. She was like a daughter to him, and to see her this destroyed over a breakup…he wanted to hunt down Dean Winchester and break his handsome face in. But Julie had told Jasper once the pain wasn't so fresh what had happened and why, and he had to admit, he agreed with Dean. Nothing was worth losing Julie.

Jasper knocked on Julie's door and after a few seconds, she opened the door. She was wearing faded jeans and an oversized sweatshirt, her curls loose and wild around her face, expression carefully neutral. "Hey, Uncle Jasper," she said with the slightest of smiles. "Come on in."

He ventured inside after her. Julie's room was small, and normally very clean. She had a bottle of wine and a glass on her bedside table, and a few books were in a haphazard pile on the floor, though. Julie sat down on her bed, and Jasper settled down on her dresser across from her and took a deep breath.

"How are you, sweetie?" he asked, clearing his throat a little nervously. But his eyes were soft and concerned, and Julie let her guard down a bit. Her uncle was just worried about her.

"I'm…" She wanted to say "good", but she didn't want to lie to Jasper.

He shook his head slightly. "I know it's rough, kid. When Taylor's mother left me…I got pretty bad. I drank way too much, I was angry and bitter and I started to shut out my brother and even my little girl."

"What happened?" Julie asked gently. Jasper, like her, preferred not to bring up painful incidents in the past. She'd never heard much about this part of her family's lives.

"Well, you had your second birthday," Jasper admitted. "And I didn't come to see you. So your daddy came storming into my house saying that I had to move on. He was sorry she had left me, but if I wasn't going to move on for my own sake, then I was going to do it for my daughter and my niece."

"And that worked?"

"It did," Jasper said, shaking his head and smiling fondly. "Thomas…he was the greatest man I ever knew. Eventually, I got tired of letting down him and Katrina, and letting down my baby girls." Jasper reached out and tousled Julie's curls, and she let him, smiling shyly. "Then I came over and you hugged my leg and you knew my name even though I hadn't visited you in weeks, and you were so precious…and they were so happy…"

Jasper stared up at the ceiling until the wetness in his eyes passed. He swallowed and said, "The point is, if I hadn't moved on, I would have missed that valuable time. With you and your parents, my own kid, the people I loved…and I can't let you make that mistake, either."

"Jasper…" Julie said, looking away.

"Look, Juliet-"

"Julie."

"Just this once, let me call you Juliet, like I used to when you actually listened to me," Jasper snapped, and Julie was surprised by the frustration in his voice. "I know it's really hard, but sweetheart, you've got to at least try to move on."

"Jasper, can we please not talk about this right now?" Julie muttered, looking down.

"I haven't talked about it for two weeks. I let you grieve, and then I asked a couple questions just so I knew I didn't have to go beat those boys with a baseball bat. But Julie, I can't let you waste your life moping over Dean Winchester!"

"I spent over a year with him, Jasper!" Julie snapped. "I've never loved anyone like him. Never. I can't just get over him like that!" She snapped her fingers.

"I know, but you could at least try," he said gently. "You could come out and talk to us every once in a while. You could distract yourself. You and I both know you could find another man, if that's what you want."

"It's not, Uncle Jasper," she said coldly. "You know what I want. That's not going to change."

Jasper took a deep breath and stood up. "He did the right thing, you know."

"What?"

"I wish you and Dean could have stayed together. That man was like a son to me, and I've never seen anyone make you so happy. But he and Sam are in a huge mess right now. They have four, maybe five Knights of Hell after them, and people around them are going to get caught in the crossfire. Juliet, I can't let that be you, and neither could he, and I agree with him there."

"It wasn't his choice to make," Julie snapped. "It was mine. _I_ get to choose what matters most to me-"

"And you'd choose Dean, and then you would die," Jasper snapped.

For a second, they glared at each other. "Please go," Julie said after a long moment, and Jasper left, frustrated. Behind him, Julie suddenly started blasting a song on her stereo, Tom Petty's "Free Fallin'." Jasper shook his head and sighed before walking over to where Taylor waited, shaking his head.

They both sighed and walked away, unable to help Julie as long as she wouldn't let them.

Julie poured herself another glass of wine and downed it all before putting her head in her hands. She focused on the words to the song to distract herself from thoughts of Dean, but the lyrics sure as hell were not helping:

"And I'm a bad boy 'cause I don't even miss her,

Yeah I'm a bad boy for breaking her heart…"

* * *

><p>"And I'm free, free fallin',<p>

Yeah I'm free, free fallin'."

Sam turned down the song Dean was blasting through the car and turned his head slightly to glance at his brother, concerned. He wasn't letting Dean drive because he was constantly half-drunk, so Dean had been sulking in the passenger seat in silence for thirty minutes.

These past two weeks had been awful. Dean rarely spoke to Sam, although Sam was pretty sure he wasn't mad at him anymore. Dean just didn't talk. He drank even more than normal, watched an obnoxious amount of television, and just tried to keep moving, finding a new case every couple of days. Most were easy and simple, but they kept him moving, kept him out of the bunker, where he would come across Julie's things constantly and want to cry or hit something.

Sam felt terrible for Dean, but he was starting to get fed up with his older brother. Sam knew how much breaking up with a woman you loved hurt, but he hadn't been _this_ bad. And yesterday, he had found that Dean had been using his computer and opened it to find a porn site. Ever since Julie, Dean had quit with the porn. He had even slowed down the drinking, to the point where he was rarely ever actually drunk. Dean had smiled more, and laughed more. He had joked with Sam more, and just been happier and healthier in every way.

Finding that porn site yesterday had been the final straw. For some reason, it really pissed him off that Dean was trying to forget Julie by distracting himself with other women, total strangers who were nothing to him. That had been the way things were with the old Dean, but even after Julie had left, Sam still felt she deserved better than that.

And so last night, Sam had called in some help.

Sam pulled into the parking lot of a dirty bar about a half hour away from where he and Dean were staying, in yet another crappy motel. Dean looked out the window and asked, "We drove all the way here for this place?"

Sam got out of the car and walked inside, Dean following him sullenly. The two brother sat down at the bar, and Dean immediately ordered their strongest whiskey before Sam corrected him and said, "Just water for both of us."

Dean shot him a dirty look and then stared at the bar, focusing on the tiny grains of wood so he wouldn't think of her.

They hadn't even been there ten minutes before a pretty, red-headed woman of about thirty came over and sat next to Dean. She was really quite hot, with shoulder-length, straight, bright red hair and a very pretty face and a sexy body. She gave him a nice smile and said, "I'm Kat."

Dean blinked. "Um, hi, Kat. Dean."

"Dean." She smirked. "Nice name. Sexy."

Dean blinked again, and glanced sideways at Sam to see if this woman was for real. Sam's eyes were wide. Kat leaned forward so Dean had little choice but to look at her nice rack. "Listen, Dean…I'm here with some people who are total bores. What do you say you and me get a drink and talk? I'm sure you're much more interesting than them."

Sam swallowed. He wasn't ready to watch Dean pick up his old streak of one night stands. They hadn't really bothered him before, but he didn't want Dean banging random women so soon after Julie…

But to his surprise, Dean said coolly, "I'm flattered, Kat, but I'm here with my brother, so…sorry, but I'll have to decline."

She blinked, surprised and annoyed. She didn't look like the type of woman who got turned down often. "Your loss," she muttered sullenly before walking away.

Dean shook his head and then looked down at the bar again. Sam didn't have to read his mind to know why Dean had turned down a woman that hot without a second thought.

"She doesn't look very happy with you, Dean," an all-too familiar voice smirked as Crowley took Kat's seat.

Dean stiffened. "Crowley? What are you-?"

"Moose called," the former king of hell replied drily. "Apparently, you're not taking your breakup very well."

Dean wasn't sure if he should be more annoyed with Sam or Crowley at the moment. "Shame, too," the demon continued. "She was a blast, that one. Funny, tough, and quite sexy, I must say…oh, I'm sorry. This probably isn't helping you."

Dean glowered at the demon, even as another voice said flatly, "You know it is not helping him to be reminded how wonderful Julie is, Crowley. Yet you continue to antagonize him anyway."

Crowley blinked and stared up at the trench coat-sporting angel that had just appeared behind Sam. "What is he doing here?" the demon snapped.

"Same thing you are," Sam said. "Dean, I know breaking up with Julie has been hard. But you did it to keep her safe from this whole issue with the Knights, and also, I'm sure, because of me…but anyway, my reasoning is that if we can the Knights out of the way, then I can get out of the way and you two might be able to be happy again."

"Sammy…" Dean started weakly. "It wasn't about you, not really. It…it was about-"

"Keeping her safe, right," Sam said. "So, these two are here to help us plan. We're going to figure out how to deal with these guys and then, if we survive… hopefully, you can be with her again."

That moment right there was when something shifted in Dean, and he finally realized that Sam really had moved on. No one who was still in love with Julie would be this desperate to get her and Dean back together. He opened his mouth to say something probably sappy to Sam, but Crowley rolled his eyes. "We get it, you boys are finally forgiving each other, very touching. I'm tearing up. Can we just get to work? I have a very busy schedule, you know."

"Oh, really?" Castiel asked. "You are no longer king of hell. What are you doing that's so much more important than this?"

"Okay, Mr. Ruler-of-Heaven, explain to me how you have time to meet the Winchester's in some random bar if _you're_ so busy!" Crowley snapped, and the angel and demon started bickering. Eventually Sam got them to stop for the moment, but, needless to say, it took the four men a long time to get much of anything done.

There had been sightings of both Asmodeus and Behemoth since they had first met and defeated Adramalech. Asmodeus had gone on a killing spree in Vegas a month or so ago, somehow finding time in all of his gambling to sleep with eight different prostitutes and leave them dead in hotel beds. And Behemoth had demolished a small, starving village in Africa, killing a couple hundred people just because he was bored.

"These demons have got to go," Dean muttered darkly. "I would think they'd have done more by now, but maybe we'll be able to stop them before they go even more wide scale with their killing."

"You'll need the Blade for that," Crowley pointed out.

Sam bit his lip. They all three knew that the demon was right, but neither Cas nor Sam wanted to let Dean go down that path again. And Dean…he knew what he must do, but then he saw Julie in his head and imagined her face if he did ever kill the Knights and come back to her and she looked into his eyes and didn't recognize him… he couldn't bear that.

"We should have it on hand," Dean decided after a long pause. "In case we need it."

After a moment, Sam and Cas sighed and gave in. Crowley smiled slightly. "I'll be back in a jiffy, boys," he said, and then he was gone.

Castiel frowned. "Dean…I'm not sure how much we should really trust Crowley. He seems a little too eager to see you use the First Blade."

"He's working with us because he wants the Knights gone," Dean replied. "And me with the Blade is our only way of killing them. So of course he wants that. But I'd say as long as we stand a chance of beating them, we can trust him. Because he needs us."

Cas and Sam both had to agree. Only now did they realize that the bar was all but empty except for an employee sweeping the floor and a bartender washing out a glass. "You guys about ready to go?" he asked pointedly, eying them. "We closed five minutes ago."

Sam, Dean, and Cas stood up and started to walk out the front door. They all stopped when they heard the bartender give a horrible gurgle and a glass shatter. Sam and Dean whirled around, pulling out knives, and they saw the bartender fall dead, a black-eyed man standing over him with a bloody knife. Dean stepped towards the demon threateningly, but another three or four demons stepped into the bar after him.

Suddenly Cas was pushing Sam and Dean into the center of the bar, and they realized that even more demons were coming through the front door. The two hunters and angel stood back-to-back, glaring at the ten demons who made a loose semicircle around them.

"What do we have here?" chuckled a demon who had just killed the other employee unfortunate enough to still be here. "The Winchester's _and _their pet angel?"

"Quite a haul," another chuckled darkly, turning his knife over in his hand.

"Cas, can you get us out of here?" Dean muttered quietly.

"There's another power here," the angel said darkly. "He's stronger than me, and he won't let me leave."

"That would be me, sorry," a rather pleasant voice said lightly, and the demons parted to let another man through. He was about Sam's age, a tall, dark-haired, attractive man in a nice dark button-down shirt and dress pants. He smiled pleasantly at his three captives. "I do apologize, Castiel. I wasn't really planning on capturing you, too, but I can't just let you run off with my boys!"

"Who are you, and what the hell do you want?" Dean snarled.

"Really, Dean?" the man said disapprovingly. "Don't you think we can have a pleasant talk without spewing profanities at each other like cavemen?"

"Considering you're a demon, I'd say no," he replied coldly.

The attractive young demon shook his head and went behind the bar. He began mixing himself a drink, talking in that same pleasant tone as he did so. "What do you say, boys? Anyone up for a drink?"

He glanced up to three dark glares, and shrugged. "Alright then. Just me." He took a swig of his glass before settling down on a bar stool, facing them. "I don't believe we've been formally introduced. I can tell from the trench coat you must be the infamous Castiel," he said, nodding at the angel. "And you must be Sam, then," he continued, taking in the youngest Winchester. "They really don't exaggerate—you are gigantic!"

Sam rolled his eyes. "Look, you son of a bitch, we obviously don't want to chat," Dean snapped. "So either try to kill us or whatever or let us go home, because I'd really like to get some sleep. So, if we're done here…"

"And they really don't exaggerate about your attitude, Dean Winchester," the man smirked. "I'm curious to see—do they exaggerate about this Mark of yours? May I see it?"

"Who's asking?" Dean snapped, although the way his arm was throbbing, he already knew.

The demon grinned. "Well, technically I'm inside a wannabe actor from Hollywood named Trevor Smith, but you boys would probably know me better by my actual name—Beelzebub."

Behind Dean, Sam stiffened, and then reached into his pocket for his phone. Dean sighed. "I was wondering how long it would be before you quit sending your siblings in and just get the job done yourself."

"Yes, I'm a bit disappointed in Apollyon and Adramalech," the king of the Knights of Hell smirked. "So Polly's currently rotting back in the pit where we were kept for another couple weeks before she gets ungrounded. And I'm letting Adramalech stay the way you boys put him for a little longer, before I decide he's been properly punished."

Dean was surprised. If this is what Beelzebub did to his siblings and closest allies, what was he going to do to them…?

"But let's not talk about them, Dean," the Knight said in almost friendly voice. "Let's talk about you and your friends here. You three are quite the heroes, and I've had several people tell me I should be watching my back for you boys. So tell me, Dean. Sam. You won't be trying to cause trouble for me, will you?"

"Well, my mother taught me not to lie right before one of your kind killed her so, sorry, pal. I'm definitely out to get you," Dean snarled.

Beelzebub sighed. "You know, Dean, I'd like you a whole lot more if you didn't have to act like the generic hero from every badly-written action movie ever."

"I don't really give a damn if you like me, considering I'm just going to kill you," Dean replied.

"With what Blade?" Beelzebub smirked. "I know you don't have it with you. Why else do you think I would come talk to you in person? I'm not stupid enough to come near you when the First Blade is around."

"So, if we had the Blade, you'd go running scared, huh?" Sam smirked. But he wasn't just asking to anger the Knight of Hell before him. This was more for the demon on the other end of the phone call he was making as this conversation went on.

"The point is, you don't," Beelzebub snapped, breaking his cool for the first time. "So I suggest you boys don't try to cause me any trouble, because, while you can't touch me, I can do virtually anything to you."

"If you try to harm them, I assure you, I will kill you and all of your demons here," Castiel said protectively, stepping in front of the brothers.

"And how will you do that?" Beelzebub smirked. "Without that Blade, you can't so much as touch me."

"Well, I'll need to fix that," Sam heard Crowley mutter into the phone, and the demon hung up.

At least he had gotten the message across to Crowley. Cas, Sam, and Dean were trapped with the king of the Knights of Hell, and if they didn't get that Blade quick, they could all soon be dead. But everything was hinging on Crowley actually being on their side and coming to save them. For now, all Sam could do was wait and hope…

* * *

><p>Julie looked up from the book she was reading when the doorbell rang. "Doorbell!" she yelled when it rang again.<p>

"Get it yourself!" Taylor yelled back, and Julie rolled her eyes before getting off her bed and going to the front door. Today she had actually gotten up and put on jeans and a button-down, dark blue shirt like her old self, so even if she didn't feel normal, she looked like it.

Julie answered the door opened the door just as Jasper walked into the hall, curious to see who would show up so late to their house. Julie found herself staring at literally the last person she would expect to see ringing her doorbell.

"Crowley?"

"Yes, yes, I know, it's great to see me," the demon muttered, agitated. "Look, Julie, we don't have time for pleasantries. We've got a problem. A very big one."

"Who's at the door?" Jasper asked before Julie could ask Crowley what he was talking about.

"One of Sam and Dean's…friends," Julie said carefully. If she said he was the former king of hell, her uncle would try to kill him, and she did not have time to explain. "What's wrong?" she snapped at Crowley.

"Beelzebub has got Sam, Dean, and Cas trapped," he said darkly, and her stomach dropped out of her.

"No," Julie gasped. "Where?"

"Some bar in Minnesota," Crowley said. "Doesn't matter. I'll get you there, and you get in there and you take this to Dean."

He held out an odd shape wrapped in brown cloth. Julie realized what it was and shook her head.

"No," she snapped. "You know what that will do to him if he uses it."

"Juliet, that man, as well as Sam and Castiel, is going to _die _if you don't get this to him!" Crowley yelled, and Jasper appeared next to Julie.

"What?!" her uncle cried, alarmed, but they didn't have time to explain.

"Take me to them," Julie said firmly, stepping out of the house. If Crowley were a normal demon, she would no longer be protected, and he could kill her. It was crazy, but she trusted him.

And Dean needed her. Dean and Sam and Cas needed her, and she would do anything to save them.

"Why do you need me to do it?" Julie asked, realizing that he could just do it himself. "Why don't you give it to Dean?"

"I'm helping you hunters, but I'm not suicidal," Crowley muttered. "If I go in there right now, I die."

"Oh, but you're okay risking me?"

"Does this really matter? Boyfriend—no, I'm sorry, _ex_-boyfriend could be dying!"

Julie moved towards Crowley, but Jasper grabbed her arm and stopped her. "Juliet, what are you doing?!" he cried.

"Sam and Dean and Cas need my help," Julie said, pleading with him with her eyes to let her go right now. "I have to go, I'm sorry. I'll be right back, hopefully with them in one piece."

Jasper opened his mouth to protest, but Crowley grabbed Julie's arm, and suddenly they were both gone. Jasper blinked, stunned and still extremely confused. And he couldn't shake the feeling that he had just seen Julie for the last time. And he hadn't even gotten a goodbye.

* * *

><p>Dean's head collided with the hard wood of the table, and he lay on the ground, bleeding from a gash on his arm, stunned for a moment. All around him, the demons were laughing cruelly, and their mocking voices fueled him to get back on his feet. He stood, ignoring how his bruised ribs cried out in pain as he did so, and wiped some blood off the side of his face.<p>

Beelzebub had been enjoying toying with him for at least five minutes. At first, the Knight had let Dean try to attack him, even letting him use his demon-killing knife, but soon the Knight had gotten bored with that and just started beating Dean senseless. Sam and Cas were both being pinned by demons, forced to watch the king of the Knights beat Dean's ass.

"Is that really all you got?" Beelzebub smirked. "This is kind of pathetic. _You're_ supposed to be the one who can kill _me_?"

Dean spat blood onto the floor and then went in for a right hook. Beelzebub blocked it easily, but that had just been a feint, and Dean kneed the demon right in the gut. The air whooshed out of his opponent, and Dean began hitting Beelzebub in the head again and again-

So fast Dean could barely see it, the demon caught his arm and twisted it. Dean heard a sharp pop, and then pain shot through him. He groaned through gritted teeth as the demon twisted his dislocated shoulder even further out of place before throwing him to the ground.

The demons laughed and roared insults. "Dean!" Sam yelled, struggling to help his brother. He was completely helpless though, as he watched Beelzebub kick Dean in the stomach over and over.

Eventually, the Knight finally seemed to get bored with beating Dean. He grabbed the poor man's shirt and forced him up against the wall, taking in the blood dripping out of Dean's mouth and the pain in his dull eyes.

"Pathetic," the demon spat, before pulling a curved, vicious-looking blade off of his belt.

"No!" Sam begged. "Please, don't!"

Beelzebub chuckled. "That's smart, Sam," the Knight smirked. "Appealing to my sense of pity. Too bad I have none."

Beelzebub suddenly stabbed the knife towards Dean, stopping an inch from his heaving chest. He scared Sam and Cas, though, and they both cried out before realizing he had just tricked them. The demons roared with laughter as Beelzebub muttered, "This time's for real," looking at Dean with cold, black eyes.

But he stopped as he realized one of the most raucous laughs had been cut off. Another demon suddenly made a gurgling, dying noise, and Beelzebub whipped around just in time to see a demon falling, dead, next to another already dead demon.

He dropped Dean and lunged forward as a third demon fell to reveal a pretty blond woman, eyes blazing with anger. Unfortunately for Beelzebub, she had just killed both demons pinning Castiel, and the angel raised his hand, his powers clashing with the demon's. Beelzebub had to struggle to force back the angel's powerful, smiting white light with his own darkness.

While Beelzebub and Cas tried to force each other's power back, Julie lunged forward and stabbed one of the demons pinning Sam. With one arm free, Sam grabbed his knife and stabbed the other demon pinning him, and Sam and Julie lunged into battle, making quick work of the other panicked demons in the room. It had been a couple weeks since they had fought together, but they were still quite a formidable duo.

Finally, Beelzebub overpowered Castiel, and the angel stumbled back into the wall, unable to compete with his overwhelming force. Beelzebub whirled around to stab Dean, but instead found that same blond woman standing next to Dean, who Sam had helped to his feet.

"And you're the lovely Juliet, I assume?" Beelzebub, back to his smooth self in an instant.

"And you're that stupid son of a bitch who tried to kill my boys?" Julie snapped. Although every part of Dean was still aching and sore, he suddenly felt about a thousand times better. Julie was here, Julie was here and she was still calling them her boys.

Beelzebub chuckled and shook his head. "You shouldn't have come. I'll have to kill you too, now."

"Not if we kill you first," she smirked, unfolding a brown bundle in her arms to reveal…

The First Blade. Beelzebub's eyes went wide, and then his eyes flicked from the only weapon capable of killing him to the only man capable of killing him with it within a few feet of each other. He hesitated for a second, and just like that, the king of the Knights vanished.

All four of them sighed in relief. Castiel quickly moved to Dean's side and healed his wounds. Dean sighed in relief as the pain vanished, and he moved his shoulder around, glad he was back to being able to move, at least.

"That could have been really bad," Sam sighed, pushing his hair out of his face. "Thank god for you, Julie."

"Thank Crowley, actually," she corrected as Sam wrapped her in a bear hug. Dean watched them hug, feeling empty inside. It was clear their easy friendship was still intact. But, although Julie had just saved him, she was probably too pissed to so much as look at him.

After a long moment, Sam and Julie pulled apart. "I missed you," they said simultaneously, and then laughed lightly. Dean looked down, not feeling jealous so much as just sad. They could still be happy together, but he had ruined everything yet again. He had no hope of ever getting Julie to even forgive him.

Suddenly, as if ordered to, Sam and Cas both stepped away from Dean and Julie, giving them some space. Julie's blue eyes met Dean's for a moment, before she looked down at the floor. Dean did the same.

"So, Crowley got you?" he asked awkwardly after a moment.

"Yeah," she said carefully. "Good thing, too. You'd be dead without me. So you're welcome."

Dean half-smirked, but something was bothering him. He looked up and actually met her gaze. "You came," he said slowly.

Julie frowned. "Of course."

"Why?"

"What…what do you mean, 'why'?" Julie snapped. "Why wouldn't I come?"

"I mean, I was a dick to you," Dean said. "We broke up. Why…why would you come?"

Julie stared at him, unable to believe that after all this, he was still surprised she had dropped everything to save him. But then suddenly she smiled and said gently, "Because you needed me."

"You needed me." He needed her. That was all that mattered. They needed each other, they loved each other. Forget the rest of the world, forget what had happened between Sam and Julie, all that mattered was that he fix their relationship, that Dean get Julie back for good.

He found himself grinning at her, and she was grinning back. Dean took a step forward, and so did Julie, and slowly, he leaned in towards her. They would share an amazing kiss, and then things would be okay between them, everything would be okay…

It all happened so fast. Julie was staring into Dean's eyes, thinking how nothing else mattered but that she loved him. And then she saw him reappear behind the man she loved. She saw Beelzebub pull back that knife to drive into Dean' back, and without even thinking, Julie screamed, "_Dean_!" and dove forward, shoving Dean to the side, out of the way.

Sam yelled, "No!" but he and Cas were too far back to help. And as for Dean, he scrambled to regain his balance and turned just in time to see the blade go straight through her heart.

It took a few seconds for everything catch up to Dean. He heard the sickening sound of the blade going through her, the little gasp of pain and surprise she made in the deafening silence that followed. He heard Beelzebub roaring in laughter, and then he saw the Knight vanish, taking his blade with him.

For a second, Julie stood suspended in space, eyes wide with pain and shock, face pale. And then she fell.

And that's when Dean snapped.

"_Julie_!" he roared, lunging forward and catching her head before it hit the ground. Dean knelt on the ground, putting her head in his lap as Sam and Cas rushed to his side.

"Cas, heal her," Dean ordered, trying to keep everything under control.

Cas touched Julie's face tenderly, but then he frowned. "Dean, I—I can't," he said brokenly. "Whatever enchantment Beelzebub had on that blade…I can't save her."

"No," Dean said flatly. "No. She'll be okay. We'll find a way to save her." He looked down at the trembling, pale, beautiful woman and said, "Okay, Jules? You hear me? You're going to be okay. We'll get you some help, just stay with me. Okay, sweetheart?"

She was gasping for air. Dean's heart sank as a trickle of blood came out of the corner of her mouth. Blood was seeping through her shirt as well, staining her red.

This wasn't happening. No, no, no. Dean would save her, he'd get help. She'd be okay. Because he could _not _lose her after all of this, after her saving him from himself, after that wonderful year of being in love, after sending her away to keep her safe. She could not die the moment she came back!

Julie was trying to say something. Dean brushed the curls off of her sweaty forehead and whispered, "Shh, it's okay, Jules. It's okay, honey, I got you. Don't worry." His voice cracked, and he realized she was getting a little blurry through a film of tears.

Julie gasped and struggled and managed to get out one word: "Dean." She wasn't pleading for help, or scared, or angry. She just wanted to say his name.

And then her beautiful blue eyes went lifeless. She quit trembling. She quit breathing. The earth was still.

"No," Dean said in a low voice that slowly built. "No, no, please, _no_! Not this! Not after everything…Julie, stay with me. Not her, dammit! _Not her_!" He was yelling now, and he took a deep, shuddering breath and whispered, "Please don't…please, I love you. I can't…"

But it was pointless. She was gone. The woman he loved was dead, because of him.

For a moment there was silence, and then Dean yelled, "Jules!" his voice so full of pain it brought tears to Cas's eyes.

Silent tears were already streaming down Sam's face. In his mind, he saw Julie a dozen different times. The first time he'd seen her, standing in her pajamas in the moonlight. The first time he made her laugh, the way her eyes lit up. He saw her stand against a Knight of Hell, saw her punch a vampire about to kill her in the face. She snapped at her bitchy grandmother. She fought demons like, well, a demon. She teased Cas. She rolled her eyes at Crowley. She hugged Sam, sobbing. She laughed, high and sweet and clear. She kissed Dean, long and sweet. She drove away.

She lay bloody and pale in his brother's arms. Another loved one dead and gone for helping them.

And Dean saw her in his mind's eye, too. He saw her face the first time they met, after he had just saved her life. The first time he made her grin. Their first kiss, his throat raw from talking for hours, his arm throbbing from a cut, yet it was still the most perfect kiss. That day at the ballgame, that night at the restaurant, that first night together. Perfect. He remembered their lives together, coming home every day to her beautiful face, working and living and relaxing and loving each other like normal people. He remembered those early hunts with Sam, what an unbeatable team they had made.

And now…he had promised himself he would keep her safe. He had promised Jasper, who was practically her father, that he would keep her safe. He had sent her away, he had hurt her, so that he would not have to bury her, too.

And that night, Dean Winchester buried Julie Carters.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong>

**First off, thank you all for all your support! This is my first fic so any feedback you can give me is great! Secondly, I apologize for all the sadness and drama. I'd love to write happy stories and fun adventures for the boys and Julie, but I honestly don't think that's really staying true to Supernatural. I originally created Julie as the woman who would be able to help Dean realize he deserved to be loved and just kind of tell him everything he needed to hear and love him. However, she's kind of evolved and I really hated killing her. However, I think it had to happen eventually. She was just too close to them. However, this story is far from over! I don't believe there's any way Sam or Dean especially would ever rest as long as they knew Julie was dead, so there's still a lot to come. Please keep reading and reviewing! Thanks!**


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty-One**

Jasper hadn't slept a wink that night, since Julie had disappeared with that strange man. He sat at the kitchen table, sharpening a knife to keep himself busy as the hours ticked away. It had been a little after midnight when Julie vanished, and it was almost four when someone finally knocked on the door.

Jasper leapt up, but Taylor, who had been watching TV to distract herself from the thought of what could be happening to her cousin, reached the door first. She opened the door, ready to snap at whoever it was, but then immediately softened when her eyes landed on the two very attractive Winchester brothers. She smiled at them and said smoothly, "Sam. Dean. Come on in, boys."

The walked in without a word, faces blank and pale and tired. Taylor shut the door behind them and turned to start hitting on them in her usual fashion, but stopped when she saw the dark circles under their eyes and the way Sam's eyes were still slightly puffy from crying.

Before she could ask any questions, Jasper reached them. "Sam, Dean," he sighed, relieved, before patting Sam's shoulder and pulling Dean into a hug. Dean didn't return the hug, though, so Jasper released him. "I'm so glad you boys are okay," he said. "When Julie ran off like that…we were worried."

Neither brother said anything, and Jasper frowned. He finally took in the barely masked pain in their expressions and the way they stood, like an unbearable weight was dragging them down. Jasper knew then what had happened, but his brain immediately shut down that horrific thought and he asked as if nothing was wrong, "Well? Where is she?"

Sam looked down, but Dean kept staring straight ahead at nothing. His expression was so blank, his eyes empty…Jasper knew, but he refused to accept it.

"Where's Julie?" Taylor asked suddenly in a voice much sharper than any Sam or Dean had ever heard. "Sam, Dean…tell me. Where's my cousin?"

Sam swallowed and glanced over at Dean, but it was clear he wouldn't be saying much. Reluctantly, the youngest Winchester raised his gaze to Jasper's and said in a soft, broken voice, "She…we just buried her."

There was a beat of silence. Then Taylor snapped, "No. Why would you say that? That's not funny, that's not…" She had to stop because there was a growing lump in her throat, and her vision was getting blurry with tears. Taylor covered her mouth and looked away from them. Sam watched sadly as she lost control and began to cry. A few seconds later, she stormed away to the basement where she lived, slamming the door behind her.

Sam flinched at the bang the door made. Still, he had expected worse. Julie was…no, had been like a sister to Taylor. Sam knew if he lost his brother again, he would react a lot worse than that.

But the storm was far from over. Jasper was staring blankly at them. "Tell me you're joking," he said surprisingly calmly after a long moment.

Sam glanced at his brother again, but Dean was staring at the floor. "I'm so sorry, Jasper," Sam said weakly. "She…she saved us from the Knight of Hell, but then he came back and…he was going to kill Dean, and she saved him, but…I'm sorry."

There was a never-ending silence as all three men stood there, paralyzed by grief. Then, finally, Dean raised his eyes and said in a pained, guilty voice, "Jasper-"

And Jasper finally snapped.

Dean didn't even get out an apology before Jasper had lashed out and hit him across the face. Sam cried out, surprised, but he was too stunned to be much of any help to Dean. Jasper hit Dean in the jaw again, and then slammed the younger man into the wall before hitting him in the gut. Dean doubled over, and Jasper threw another punch. Sam knew Dean could have blocked it, because Jasper was getting sloppier and sloppier as he was overcome with grief, but Dean let the older man's fist catch him on the side of the face. He let it happen, and Sam found that he was letting Julie's uncle beat up his brother as well.

Jasper grabbed Dean's collar and shook him roughly. "You _promised_!" Jasper yelled. "You promised me you would keep my Juliet safe, Dean Winchester! I let you have her, and then you sent her away and you broke her heart, just so you could get her _killed_!"

Jasper was red in the face with rage, but there were tears in his eyes as well. "You promised," Jasper repeated angrily, shaking Dean again.

And the younger man raised his head and said in a voice more broken and guilty than any Jasper had ever heard, "I know."

With those two words, all of the fight went out of Jasper. He could not hit this man who refused to fight back, this man who had been like a son to him. And he couldn't hate Dean either, because Dean had done all he could to protect Julie.

Besides, there was nothing he could do to Dean that could hurt him more than losing her had.

Jasper let go of Dean, and he started to slide down the wall until Sam caught his arm and pulled him upright. Jasper stared at the two brothers for a moment and then said, "You can sleep here tonight. But be gone when I get up."

He walked into the kitchen and shut the door. Dean picked up his bag and started up the stairs, but not before he heard glass shatter in the kitchen and Jasper yelling in anger and pain and grief.

* * *

><p>Needless to say, Dean didn't sleep well that night.<p>

He and Sam slept in the room where Dean had stayed for a couple weeks. The room where he had first slept with Julie. Everything in here brought up memories of her, and when Dean's eyes, which couldn't shut without seeing her bloody corpse, roamed around the room, he saw a picture on the bedside table. One of Julie and Taylor, wearing dresses for some wedding or other event the family must have gone to before Dean met them.

There was the face that Dean had spent the past year staring at with love in his eyes. The same hair he had stroked when she cried. The same body that lay next to his each night. The same lips he had kissed hundreds of times.

He couldn't take this. Making sure Sam was asleep, Dean got up and went into the kitchen. He got out a beer and walked around outside the house, trying to lessen the pain by drowning it in alcohol. One of the disadvantages of having a high alcohol tolerance was that it took a lot to get him drunk, and so by the time he came across the shed where he had first kissed Julie, he was still thinking very clearly.

Dean stepped inside and stared at the counter where they had sat, talking for hours. He could still find the exact place he had stood when they first kissed. And there was the corner of the room where they had sex once, just because they could.

Dean rubbed his eyes and ran his hand over his face, trying to stop the wetness in his eyes. Eventually, the tears passed, and he stood there feeling…empty.

"Are you happy now?"

Dean turned slightly to see Taylor standing in the doorway. He had never seen her without makeup, or with the puffy red eyes she had from crying. Dean was surprised by what almost looked like hate in her eyes.

"Are you happy now?" she repeated, taking a step towards him. "Now that you got her killed?"

Dean stiffened like she had just hit him. "Taylor…" he started weakly.

"It's _your fault_, Dean!" Taylor cried, grief-stricken. "She was back at home, and even if she was miserable, she was safe! And then you two get in trouble, and she rushes off to save you, and you get her killed. You took my cousin away from me and you got her _killed_!"

"I know I did," Dean said flatly.

"You don't seem very sorry about it!" she snapped. "You come in here and tell us she's dead, that she died for you, and yet you're fine! What makes you worth her dying for?"

"Nothing," he said. "I wasn't worth it."

Taylor slapped him, and he had to admit, he was surprised. He'd rarely seen Taylor do anything violent, even on hunts. Dean blinked and slowly turned to look back at her. She was breathing heavily, and she spat, "It should have been you."

Dean's temper flared. "Don't you think I know that?" he snarled. "Don't you think I wish _I _was the dead one?! She was never supposed to die—that's why I sent her away. So that she would never get hurt because of me. I didn't deserve her, Taylor, and I failed her, and you've got every right to want to kill me. I would, too."

They stared at each other for a long moment. Taylor wanted to hit Dean again, but staring into those grief-filled, green eyes, she realized she could never hate this man as much as he hated himself for what had happened.

Dean watched as she turned her back on him and walked out. Taylor and Jasper. Two more people he had cared about and probably lost forever. But the loss of them could never compare to losing her.

Dean returned to the room where Sam was sleeping and waited a couple hours before waking up his brother. Within a few minutes of getting up, the two brothers were gone, leaving Taylor and Jasper behind probably for good.

It was for the best, anyway. As long as those two stayed away from Sam and Dean, they had a whole lot better chance of not ending up like Julie.

* * *

><p>Cas returned from his mission to find and revive Julie the next day, with one of the worst pieces of information Sam and Dean had ever received: not only was Julie dead, but Beelzebub had dragged her soul down to hell.<p>

The Knights of Hell had the woman Dean loved in hell to torture for all of eternity. And he knew exactly what that entailed, having endured forty years of hell himself.

Castiel assured Sam and Dean that he and his angels would be doing everything they could to save her, but she was under even heavier guard than Dean, the righteous man, had been, with at least Beelzebub, if not more Knights of Hell guarding her and torturing her.

And that was the thought that kept Dean going for the next month. Whenever he would think about how hopeless this was, when he would get fed up chasing dead trails and searching for answers that weren't there, he would only have to think of Julie in even a fraction of the agony he had felt in hell, and he was filled with a new fury.

Sam began to seriously worry about Dean. He had never been present when Dean would have to deal with the loss of his brother, obviously, but he imagined that Dean would have been something like the man he saw now. Dean was letting himself go—he rarely slept, and if so, it was only for a few nightmare-filled hours. He drank so heavily Sam began to worry about his health. He rarely ate or spoke. He was pale all the time, with dark circles under his eyes. He wore the same clothes several days in a row, rarely shaved, and the bunker, or at least his room, was slowly falling into disrepair.

All that was bad enough, but Sam had even bigger worries. He was really beginning to worry about Dean's mental health and his control over the Mark. He often woke up to Dean's screams as in his nightmares he relived his torturous years in hell and imagined Julie enduring the same agony. And Sam had walked into the room more than once to find Dean staring at the Mark of Cain on his arm, or to find Dean's hand trembling uncontrollably, his eyes dark and conflicted.

Sam did everything he could for Dean. He tried to keep him moving, kept the research and lore flowing. He even found a couple cases for them to work, but it was clear Dean was not interested in anything but saving Julie. There were a few times Sam tried to talk to Dean about what was going on, but Dean refused to talk about it. He was shutting down his feelings, and they were slowly destroying him.

Sam had to admit, he wasn't doing a lot better. He had his own fair share of nightmares, and he struggled with a drinking problem of his own. He often found himself turning to say something to Julie, and her loss would hit him like a punch in the gut all over again. Sam knew if he didn't have Dean to worry about, he would probably already be falling apart. And Sam knew he was the only thing holding Dean together.

But this couldn't go on much longer. Both brothers were slowly falling into disrepair, and no one really seemed to be able to help them. Cas visited a couple times, but he never had good news. Crowley wisely stayed away from the boys. While he had saved them, he had sent Julie in instead of himself, and both Sam and Dean blamed him in part for Julie's death. The demon had been smart enough to get the Blade back so they needed him, because otherwise Dean would probably have hunted him down and killed him just so he had someone to punish besides himself.

Jody visited for a couple days, and Dean made himself presentable as long as she was there. The three of them were miserable together, but as soon as Jody had gone back to the teenage girl she was raising, Dean had fallen apart all over again. That was three weeks after Julie's death, and Sam was beginning to give up hope. No demon was stupid enough to make a deal with the Winchester's, and no angel seemed to be able to save Julie. If heaven and hell both couldn't help them…who or what could?

If Beelzebub had meant to destroy Sam and Dean, he had found how. A month after Julie's death, the two were threatening to fall apart at the seams. Dean was sure the Knight of Hell would be quite proud of all the damage he has caused.

And the worst part was, there was no end in sight. Cas had been out of reach for several days, Crowley was gone, no demons or angels would help them…with all of their resources, after everything they had done, Sam and Dean Winchester were completely helpless to rescue Julie from hell.

She was gone. Every day, Dean would wake up and realize it, and slowly but surely he was starting to realize that wasn't going to change. And it was destroying him. If he continued down this path, Dean knew he would lose himself, and Sam was too broken already to save him. The only person who could save him was dead…

* * *

><p><em>Screams. Fire. Blood. Choking on air so thick with the smell of sulfur it coated the inside of her throat. Or was that just her blood? Didn't matter, she no longer had an arm and she was on fire now and she was screaming and he was laughing, and she was so near death but she couldn't die, no. She was already dead. And then, when the pain was so bad she was going to just cease to exist-<em>

_It stopped. She was whole once again and he would lean close and whisper into her ear, "What do you say, Juliet? Are you ready to get off that rack and join me?"_

"_No." Every time, it was always no, even if she was sobbing or her voice was so broken she could barely speak. It was always no, and then he would begin again, or Asmodeus, or one of their other demons when they wanted a day off. Never ending, for all of eternity, nothing but torture and torture and more-_

_And then all of the sudden there was white light. White light cutting through the fire and the blood and the screams and the agony and she heard a high-pitched noise so powerful it shattered her. All around her, screams and bright light and the sounds of fighting, and she was too weak and battered and broken to even lift her head._

_Beelzebub's voice, his voice that had been the only sweet thing she'd heard down here, that syrupy tone turned sour. "You were a fool to come here, Castiel!"_

"_You were a fool to take her," another voice said coldly, a voice she hadn't heard in years. The voice of a friend. "You were a fool to hurt them."_

_Then there was more fighting, and she finally found in her the strength to lift her head when she heard her friend cry out in pain. He was bleeding, clutching his side, but he staggered over to her anyway, and his hand, the first gentle touch in ten years, touched her shoulder where, many years ago, he had touched _him.

_For a moment, she thought of him, of his green eyes and his smile, and the way he had talked and the darkness in him and the light, too. And in that instant before the white light swallowed her, for the first time in ten years, Julie smiled a little._

_She was going to see him soon._

* * *

><p>Sam tensed as he heard someone knocking on the bunker door. The only person he could think of coming here would be Cas, but Cas normally just appeared inside and scared the shit out of them. Sam glanced around for Dean, but he was holed up in his room, nursing his wounds with a bottle, Sam was sure. As per usual.<p>

Sam cautiously found a few weapons and stuffed them on his belt before approaching the door suspiciously. He had no idea what could be behind that door as he swung it open, tense and ready for a fight.

And he found himself staring at the last face he had expected to see…well, ever again. Sam's throat worked furiously as he stared in shock at her. Finally, he got out one word: "_Julie_?"

Julie blinked as she took him in. Wow. Had Sam really been that tall? And had his hair really been that long? He definitely hadn't had that scruff. Julie decided she was making Sam shave as soon as they got past the whole you're-not-dead phase.

Sam Winchester stared down at her in shock. Lips trembling slightly, he asked again, "Julie?"

Julie found herself smiling. It felt odd. Smiling wasn't something she'd done in…well, years. "Hey, Sam," she said gently.

All of the sudden, he was splashing a small canteen of water onto her neck. She blinked before wiping herself dry. "Right. Holy water. Good call." Sam stared at her in shock, and she said, "Well, don't stop now! Test me with some silver to make sure I'm not a shifter."

Sam held out a silver knife with a trembling hand, and Julie pressed it to the bare skin of her arm. She was wearing a black tank top and jeans that she had stolen from some poor, unsuspecting family a few miles back. Walking around in smelly, dirty clothes that had been on her corpse for about a month was getting her weird looks, so she had stolen some clothes and brushed her hair and teeth in a gas station bathroom on the way here. It had been a long drive in a car that she had also stolen (oops), but she had come almost without stopping to the bunker. She was desperate to see Sam and Dean after what had been ten years for her.

Sam started to smile when her skin didn't burn at the silver. "…Julie?" he asked again, really starting to believe she was there.

"Surprise!" she said, smirking slightly.

Sam suddenly tackled her in a hug so tight she could barely breathe. "Can't—breathe," she choked out, and he eased up a little. Julie hugged Sam back tightly, taking in his solid warmth. It felt so freaking amazing to have physical contact with someone, anyone, and not have them torturing her.

Julie's eyes were wet when they pulled apart, and so were Sam's. "I—but—how?" Sam got out, overwhelmed by this sudden turn of events.

Before Julie could reply though, the other Winchester walked into the room, muttering, "Who was there, Sammy?"

He didn't look up, but that didn't stop Julie from staring at him like she was seeing a ghost. He was wearing his typical faded jeans and button-down, dark shirt. But he didn't look so good. He had more stubble than normal, and his skin had an unhealthy pallor. There were dark circles under his eyes, which were dull and lifeless. Julie's heart squeezed painfully. She had missed him so much in hell, and he obviously hadn't fared well, either.

Dean looked up and then went even whiter, if that was possible. But, for the first time in weeks, Sam saw a light come into his eyes. Sam grinned, he couldn't help it. He watched Dean and Julie stare at each other for a long moment, and then he said, "Dean…I checked. It's really her."

Dean still didn't say anything, so Julie said carefully, "Hey, Dean. Um, it's, uh, it's good to see you. I missed you. A lot."

Suddenly, Dean took a large breath and unfroze. "Jules?" he asked as if he couldn't believe his eyes, and Sam stepped quickly out of the way as they ran to each other.

Dean held Julie tightly, afraid to let go. She buried her face in his neck, and he pressed his face into her hair until he could compose himself. In an instant, everything had changed. Just a few minutes ago, he was struggling to find the will to keep moving, wondering what the point was, about to give up hope. And then there she was at the door, saving him again.

Neither one of them seemed to want to pull apart, but eventually Julie stepped away from Dean. "I don't understand," he said slowly. "How…what…?"

"Cas," Julie said warmly. "He took practically every single one of his followers into hell and attacked and he got me out, but…" Her expression darkened. "He lost a lot of his followers. And he got hurt pretty badly."

"What? Where is he?" Dean asked, concerned.

"I don't know," Julie admitted. "He brought me up where you guys buried me, but after that I don't know what happened to him. And we need to find him, guys. Beelzebub stabbed him. It wasn't a mortal wound, I don't think, but…I'm just worried about him."

Dean nodded. "Okay. We should go back to where you were raised, start there. Sam, could you check hospitals, and Julie and I can search the area for him?"

Sam nodded, staring in wonder at his brother. Here was the woman he loved, back from the dead, but because Dean's best friend was in danger, he was completely ignoring the fact. The guy sure knew how to compartmentalize.

And so, without another word, Sam and Dean and Julie got into their separate cars and drove off, back to work.

* * *

><p>Dean slammed the Impala door as he got out to pace, running a hand through his hair, frustrated. Julie quietly got out of the car and leaned against the body of it, watching him.<p>

They'd been searching for Cas for nearly six hours, with no luck. It was nearing midnight, and they both knew they should call it a day and find a cheap motel to get some sleep. Julie hadn't slept in years, and Dean still looked like he could use some sleep. She had gotten him to eat at a crappy diner, and with her back, he had been able to eat again, eating so much food she felt a little sick. He did look better now than he had when she first saw him, but something was still different about Dean.

Julie studied him. He was the same man she had left…was it really only a month ago? There was an extra crease between his eyebrows, and he frowned more, but he was the same tall, handsome, tortured man she had been remembering all that time in hell. The demons had constantly thrown visions of him in pain, visions of him torturing her at Julie, but she had been able through all of that to cling to the thought of Dean as he really was.

He had been the only thing that had gotten her through that…well, hell. Even thoughts of her family, of Sam hadn't been enough to get her through some of the truly awful tortures Beelzebub or his second in command, Asmodeus, dreamed up. But the thought of Dean kept her going, kept her saying no when Beelzebub gave her the offer to torture instead of being tortured.

Julie pulled herself out of those dark, nightmarish thoughts and focused on Dean. He ran a hand over his face and sighed, the moonlight glinting off the ring on his hand and throwing his handsome face into shadow. Julie had forgotten about that little bump in his nose from it being broken repeatedly, forgotten about the way his body contorted as he walked. She had forgotten the shape of his lips and the roundness of his shoulders. But seeing him now, really seeing him, she felt whole again, enough to look around at the bushes they were parked behind and smirk, "We're not going to find Cas by hiding behind some bushes, you know."

"We're not going to find him tonight, anyway," Dean sighed. "There's not a motel for another couple dozen miles, and I'm sick and tired of sitting in that car, not talking."

Julie blinked. "Okay, so let's talk."

"You went to hell," he said flatly.

"Fun subject!"

Dean shook his head. "What…what was it like, Julie? What did they _do _to you?"

Screams and blood and fire, her own burning flesh filled Julie's mind for a moment. "You know, Dean," she choked out.

"For how long?" he asked, anguished.

"Ten years."

He looked down at the ground. "I'm…did you…did you ever say yes?"

"No," Julie said truthfully. "I never once tortured another soul down there."

Dean's eyes darkened. "I did. For as long as you were down there, I was torturing souls."

"But Dean, you made it through thirty years before that," Julie protested. "Anyone would give in!"

"Not you," Dean said firmly. "Not my dad, either."

"This isn't important," she said, trying to change the subject so he would quite hating himself.

Instead, he decided to get pissed at her. "You're right; it's not. Julie, you went to hell. For me. The whole reason I sent you away was to keep you safe from me, and yet you go and die and go to hell for me anyway?"

"I'm not going to say I'm sorry," she said firmly.

"No, of course you're not," Dean muttered. "You're too stubborn for that."

This was not happening. They were not fighting already! "I'm not going to say I'm sorry because I don't regret what I did!" Julie snapped. "I mean, sure, I wish I hadn't gone to hell, but saving you…I'm glad I did it. I'd do it again. If anybody needed to not go through hell again, it's you, Dean."

"Well, I guess you failed, because every day without you has been hell!" he snapped. Julie blinked, hurting for him. "Why did you do it, anyway?" he sighed. "We were fighting. We were broken up. Why would you come save us, why would you die for me?"

"You're kidding, right? Dean, has nothing I've ever said to you actually sunk in? I came because _I love you._"

"And what about Sam?" Dean pointed out.

Julie sighed. "I'm sure he didn't tell you this, but those couple of weeks we were broken up, I talked on the phone with him. A lot. We talked about us, how whatever was between us wasn't going to work, if we ever wanted to be together again, the three of us. I think he was moving on, and I know I was, too. And then, in hell…you were the thing that kept me going. Not Sam, not my family, just the thought that if I got through this, I could see you again. Loving you is the only thing that…that kept me sane."

It looked like Dean might be on the verge of tears. His hand trembling a little, he reached out and gently brushed his hand across her cheek. She closed her eyes and leaned forward, touching her forehead to his. They stood alone in the dark, so many things unsaid between them, just content to be together again. "Jules…" Dean started, but what more was there to say that she didn't already know?

When Julie opened her eyes and pulled away slightly, her expression was a little mischievous. "You know…we really don't have to meet up with Sam until tomorrow morning. And there's not much we can get done now anyway."

Dean began to smile. "What exactly are you suggesting?"

"It's been ten years for me, Dean," Julie said. "And dammit, I cannot wait any longer!"

Dean grinned at her, a real, honest grin he hadn't given anyone in six weeks. Then he bent slightly to kiss her. It was a good kiss, a long, passionate kiss. When they finally pulled apart, Dean immediately walked over to the trunk and unlocked it, pulling out a couple quilts. He threw them to Julie who smiled to herself as she opened the back of the car and spread them across the backseat. While she was still bent over, Dean grabbed her hips, brushing his thumb across the anti-possession tattoo on her back that she had gotten replaced just before she had died…

Dean pushed that thought aside. Nothing else mattered but that Julie was here now, alive and well, with him. He turned her to face him, and she reached up and kissed him, one hand on the back of his neck and another in his hair. He pulled her even closer and they kissed fiercely, mouths moving together.

Finally, Dean wanted more. He started pulling her jacket off of her thin shoulders, and she shook it off, leaving her in jeans and a black tank top. For a moment, Dean stopped to stare at the imprint of Castiel's handprint on her shoulder. He had a matching one, although it was much less recent. Then Dean and Julie both took off his jacket, and Julie unbuttoned his shirt, tossing it onto the pile of discarded clothes in the bottom of his car. Julie ran her hands over his muscled arms and chest as they kissed again.

After a while, Dean came up for air and smirked, "Ladies first!" Julie lay down on her back in the Impala, and Dean straddled her, slamming the door behind him with his foot. Lying underneath him, Julie kissed Dean's mouth, then the stubble on his jaw, his neck. Her hands slid to the hem of his shirt, and she pulled it over his head and tossed it onto the floor.

Julie ran her hands over Dean, reminding herself how his warm, tan skin felt underneath her touch, the way his muscles rippled and strained as he moved. She touched the Mark of Cain on his arm, Castiel's faded handprint on his shoulder, the anti-possession tattoo on his chest. The marks of heaven, hell, and a hunter. She kissed the light freckles on his shoulder, breathing in the smell of him. Dean closed his eyes and rested his head against the cold window, drinking in her touch like she was drinking in him.

They carried on for a while, reacquainting themselves with each other. Gradually, their clothes all hit the floor of the Impala, and Dean and Julie enjoyed one of their greatest nights together. Eventually, Dean lay down next to Julie in a sprawl of limbs and bare skin, pulling a quilt up over them. Julie drifted off to sleep first, and Dean brushed his lips across her arm, which was draped across his chest, before he finally drifted off, lips pressed to the top of her head. That night they slept well, happier than they had been in a long, long while.

* * *

><p>Sam looked up as the Impala pulled up next to his car. Dean got out of the driver's side and rushed to Julie's side to help her out like a gentleman. She laughed as he helped her out, and Dean pulled her in for a long, sweet kiss.<p>

Sam waited for that ugly rush of jealousy he had once felt whenever he saw them like that. Instead, he felt only a rush of some warm, fond emotion, and he grinned. Clearly, those two had made up. All Sam had wanted for the past six weeks was for his brother to be happy again, with Julie. And somewhere, in all that wishing for his brother to be happy, he must have moved on. Without her there every second of every day, that passion had slowly faded until he could think clearly. Losing Julie had given him perspective; Sam could survive if Julie died, as long as Dean was there. But Dean could not.

Sam got out of the car and walked over to the happy couple. Julie grinned at him. "Hey, Sam. Any luck?"

"I think so," Sam said, smiling fondly at her. She looked really good today, for someone who had probably quit screwing his brother just long enough to get dressed and drive over here. A lot healthier than she should, having been dead until yesterday. And Dean looked a _lot _better. There was light in his eyes, and he couldn't stop smiling. The circles under his eyes were faded, and his skin had a healthy flush to it. Sam hadn't looked in the mirror in a while, but he was sure that he looked better, too, now that the three of them were back together.

"So you think he's here?" Dean asked, looking up at the small hospital in front of them.

"Yesterday, someone found a Caucasian man with dark hair in a trench coat with a stab wound on the side of the road, unconscious, and brought him here," Sam recited. "So yeah, I think he's here."

"Well, let's go see the man who saved our Julie then," Dean grinned before putting an arm around Julie and leading them inside.

The place was strangely quiet, which was their first warning sign. Dean described Cas to the first nurse they saw, and she pointed them to a room at the end of the hall. Sam muttered, "Christo," as she walked past him, but she didn't even notice. The three of them relaxed slightly and stepped into Castiel's room.

"Cas," Dean breathed, relieved, rushing to the side of the bed where his best friend lay in a hospital gown. Julie and Sam hurried to Cas's side as well.

"No, Dean, don't!" Cas started to protest, but it was too late. The door slammed behind them, and the three hunters turned to see four demons stepping out of the corner, wielding wicked, curved knives. Dean immediately shoved Julie behind him and pulled his demon-killing knife out, while Sam did the same with an angel blade.

"We figured you boys would be coming for Cassie soon enough," a tall, bearded demon smirked, eyes flashing black. His eyes landed greedily on Julie, and he grinned. "Juliet, sweetheart…looks like you found your boyfriend already! Good for you. Too bad we're going to have to take you away from him again when we send you back where you belong."

Dean opened his mouth to snarl at the demon who dared talk to the woman he loved like that, but Julie brushed Dean aside and said coolly, "Cute. Unfortunately for you, Damian, there's no Beelzebub or Asmodeus to hide behind up here. Just you and me. And I am going to kill you, that's for sure. Whether or not I kill you slowly to make up for all those years…that depends on whether or not you leave these guys out of it."

"No can do, sweetheart," the demon, Damian chuckled. "These boys belong to the king. And Castiel…well, we'll put him out of his misery."

Dean glanced back at Castiel, concerned. Was his friend really in such terrible shape? He didn't look too bad, just exhausted, and obviously not back to full strength if he couldn't take on these demons by himself.

However, he didn't need to. And neither did Sam or Dean, it turned out.

One of the demons was stupid enough to lunge at Dean while he was turned to glance at Cas, and Julie's knife flicked out wicked fast, slicing the demon's throat wide open. As that demon bled out, two others leapt forward. Dean lifted his knife to help Julie, but he and Sam both found themselves staring openmouthed as she made quick work of the two demons.

Julie had always been a good fighter, fast and clever and quick on her feet. However, opponents as big and tough like these demons could overpower her, or at least the old her. But something had happened to Julie in hell. She had gotten tougher and stronger and abandoned all principles while she fought. She stabbed one demon in the spinal cord so that he was paralyzed but not dead, and then sparred the other for a couple seconds until she was able to stab him in the gut. She stabbed him again in the throat and turned around to finish the other one off.

The fourth demon, the one she had called Damian, turned and tried to run. Julie straightened up, saw him running, and threw her angel blade. It spun through the air and hit him in the back, killing him almost instantly. All that had happened within ten seconds of her killing the first demon.

Sam, Dean, and Cas stared open-mouthed as Julie brushed her curls out of her face and looked at the four dead demons lying at her feet. She walked over to Damian and pulled her knife out of his back before wiping it clean on his shirt. Then Julie turned to face the three of them, smirking slightly.

Her smirk faded when she saw how all three of them looked nearly scared. She knew that hell had changed her, hardened her, but she had hoped that these men she cared so deeply about wouldn't have to know about it…

Julie cleared her throat awkwardly. "Um…sorry about the mess. I'll clean that up in a minute. You okay, Cas?"

"I'm still healing," Castiel admitted, looking down at his body. He was not used to having a limit to his power. Ever since Dean got him Metatron's juiced-up grace, he had been feeling great. But after that disastrous battle in hell for Julie where he had lost several of his most loyal followers and gotten that wound from Beelzebub's enchanted blade, it was taking him longer to recover than he had expected. He knew that Metatron's grace was slowly fading, but he still had a while before he needed to worry too much…

"Do you think you can walk?" Dean asked, and in answer the angel stood and stretched.

"I'm still not as breakable as you humans, Dean," Cas smirked. Dean searched the room until he could find Cas some clothes, while Sam and Julie did their best to mop the blood off the floor. Once Cas was back in his usual clothes, Sam and Julie carefully sneaked the corpses out behind the hospital to dispose of them. Meanwhile, Castiel studied his old friend.

Dean looked remarkably better than the broken, slowly failing man he had checked in on occasionally. Julie had only been back a day, and yet already she was healing him. All that time ago, Julie had saved Dean from himself, but it was clear now, after losing her once, that she was still needed to keep him sane and himself. Once, Sam would probably have been enough, but Sam had enough trouble trying to keep himself whole. Although, after everything Julie had endured before Cas was able to save her…she wasn't in great shape herself, either.

"You saved her," Dean said suddenly, and Cas was snapped out of his thoughts. Dean's green eyes were locked on him. "You risked yourself and all those followers to save her."

"Of course I did," Cas said, surprised. "She did not deserve to be down there. And besides, you and Sam needed her, and…she's my friend."

Dean smiled slightly. "Still…I couldn't ask that of you."

"She was worth it," Cas assured Dean.

Dean shook his head. "God, I don't deserve you. Or her, or Sammy…"

"Don't even start with that," Julie snapped as she and Sam reentered. Her eyes softened as they landed on Cas, and she smirked slightly, saying, "You look _good_, Cas."

The angel smiled sheepishly. "As do you, Julie. I'm glad to see you…"

"Alive again?" she finished. "Well, that's all thanks to you."

"Don't mention it," he muttered, looking down.

"No. You risked your life and some of your followers died so that you could save me. I didn't deserve that."

"Of course you did," Cas insisted. "You are far too good to be in hell, and besides…these men needed you. Of course, I would do anything to save you."

Julie grinned and hugged Cas briefly. He stood stiffly until she released him and rolled her eyes. "Well, we should get going, boys. If there were four demons, there could always be more..."

And so, the four of them started out to their cars and set out for home, together again, and ready to go back to work.

* * *

><p>Sam looked up as Julie knocked on the door to his room. Ever since Hannah had showed up at the bunker around midnight to help Castiel back into heaven, Sam had holed up in here to give Dean and Julie some space, so he was a little surprised to see her here and not banging her brother to make up for all that lost time.<p>

"Hey, Sam," she said carefully, stepping into his room.

Sam turned off the TV he had been watching and patted his bed for her to sit. "What's up?"

She settled down a respectful distance away from him. "Look, Sam, I just…I wanted to make sure everything is…okay between us."

He nodded. "Right. Well, I don't think I'm still in love with you, if that's what you mean."

Julie's mouth twitched. "Yeah, I think I'm over that too." There was a long silence. "I just…I don't want things to be awkward between us, you know? You were my best friend, and I still want you to be, but I understand if that's too hard…"

"No, I want that, too," Sam assured her, and they both laughed a little, relieved. After a moment, they hugged briefly. When they pulled apart, Sam told her she could stay and hang with him for a while.

"I'd love to, but…I'm pretty sure Dean would rather I be with him right now, you know?" Julie said carefully. "We've got a lot of…catching up to do."

Sam waited for that surge of jealousy at the thought of Dean screwing Julie all night, but it didn't come. He was so relieved he leaned forward and kissed Julie on the cheek, surprising them both. "I'm so glad you're back," he said softly.

Julie hugged Sam again, much longer this time. "Me too," she whispered, finding that in his warm, solid arms she could effectively block out those awful memories of hell for a few seconds.

Eventually, they pulled apart, and Julie left Sam's room. She walked to the room she shared with Dean and stopped in the doorway, smiling gently. God, the poor guy must not have slept in…well, a month. He was out cold, even though five minutes ago he had been taking off his clothes and trying to get her to do the same. However, she had wanted to make sure things were good with Sam as soon as possible, and Dean had not been able to stay awake for the five minutes it took to check on Sam.

She didn't even care, though. She was just glad that he was able to sleep again. Julie changed into pajama shorts and a tank top and slipped under the covers next to Dean. He stirred slightly, and Julie rubbed his bare back soothingly, kissing the light freckles on his shoulder blade.

Dean sighed contentedly, but after a few moments, he rolled over to face Julie. He kissed her for a long, sweet moment and whispered, "I love you, Jules," still half-asleep.

He draped his arm over her waist and within a few seconds, he was out again. Julie smiled again and pressed her cheek against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat.

"I know," she whispered. And, while Dean slept soundly in a bed for the first time in a couple months, really, Julie slept fitfully, afraid to truly drift off and wake Dean up with her screams as memories from hell haunted her all night long.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty-Two**

Taylor and Jasper were going about their usual morning routine: get up, mope around, shoot dark looks at inanimate objects, eat breakfast and drink beer in a stony silence. Things had already been tense enough between them without Julie's light and sense of humor and ability to somehow force father and daughter to get along. But then, knowing that she was dead and not just running around the country with the Winchester's…the whole world seemed dark and pointless, now.

Taylor glanced up as someone knocked on the door. "I assume you're not going to get that?" she muttered, and Jasper ignored her. She sighed and got up, stalking over to the door and throwing it wide open.

Immediately, Taylor felt self-conscious. She was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt, something she normally would not be caught dead in facing a handsome guy like this. She was wearing no makeup, and her hair was unbrushed. She would be mortified if it weren't for the fact that she knew this handsome young man before her.

"James?" she asked, confused. "What are you doing here?"

The tall, well-built young man walked into the house, uninvited. He wore jeans, work boots, and a dark jacket, and he had the short blond hair and ruggedly handsome looks of a hunter. "Tell me it's not true," he said to no one in particular.

"James?!" Jasper cried, getting up. "What are you doing here? It's been…well, almost two years!"

"There's a rumor going around that Julie's in _hell_, Jasper!" James cried. "And I need you to tell me that's not true."

Taylor looked down, and Jasper swallowed. "Look, James…I think you should calm down a little bit-"

"Just give me a straight answer, Jasper," the handsome young man snapped. "Where. Is. Julie."

"Hell, alright?" Jasper snapped, throwing all tact to the wind. "She's been dead and in hell for a month."

"I don't…how…" James put his head into his hands for a moment, composing himself. Then he raised his head and his brown eyes locked on Jasper's. "Who did this?" he asked in a dark voice. "I'll kill them."

"No, you won't," Taylor snapped, everything about this interaction rubbing her the wrong way. "A Knight of Hell killed her. Their king, actually. And the only person who can kill them is the person she died to save."

"Hang on," James said, head spinning. He had just found out that one of the only women he'd ever really loved, the only woman he had ever actually wanted to settle down with, was dead. And now she was in hell, after being killed by a nearly invincible demon?

"Let me get this straight," he said slowly. "Is this person she died for…is that the same guy she ran off with last year?"

Jasper glared at the floor. If he hadn't let her run off with Dean…maybe she'd still be here. But he couldn't have stopped her, and he knew that. "Same guy," Julie's uncle said sullenly.

"But the only guy who can kill them…the guy who killed Abbadon…that's _Dean Winchester_!"

Neither father nor daughter looked nearly surprised enough by what he'd just said. "Yeah, we know," Taylor said flatly. "We were close with him and Sam, right up until they got my cousin killed."

James sat down on the couch, uninvited. He needed to get his head to quit spinning. Jasper sighed and said, "Let me get you a beer, James. It's…it's a lot to take in."

While Jasper left to get beers all around, Taylor crossed her arms and stared at James. She could remember the first time she'd met him. She, Jasper, and Julie had been hunting a couple of shifters just outside of Maine, and found another hunter already working the case. And right away, Taylor had developed a crush on the handsome, charming, quick-witted James Hawthorne. He had hit on her for a couple of minutes, and then Julie had arrived on the scene.

And just like that, he was captivated. Taylor loved her cousin dearly, but there was some quality about her that made men fall madly in love with her, and it had always pissed Taylor off. Within a few days, James was practically worshipping the ground Julie walked on, head over heels for her. Watching Dean fall for Julie had reminded her a lot of watching James fall for her. It had only taken a few days for _that _handsome, charming, quick-witted hunter to fall in love with Julie. Only that time, Julie had fallen back.

That was one thing about James and Julie that had always bothered Taylor, besides the fact that her cousin always got the really good guys. Nobody wanted a slut like her, anyways. But, while James was captivated by Julie, and she was interested in him, she played hard to get. She wouldn't sleep with him the whole time they were on the hunt, and it took him visiting their home a couple weeks later and proving to Julie he really did have feelings for her before they actually had sex. The two of them dated for six months, James sometimes staying with the Carters', and Julie sometimes travelling with him. They were happy and all; in fact, James was so happy that after only six months of dating, he asked Julie if she would consider quitting hunting so that they could settle down and have a family someday. She had been so angry at him for trying to change her that they had broken up, but there was another part to it: Julie just didn't love James. Even though he had been a great guy to her, and she had really, really liked him…she hadn't loved him.

Then Dean Winchester came along. A guy so messed-up and dark, with so much baggage he dragged anyone who got close down with him. And while he was very hot, and Taylor would have definitely hit that, she had never really had serious feelings for him. She couldn't handle that much baggage. In fact, she rather hated this lifestyle of hunting and the baggage that came with it. She wasn't very good at it, and there was a large part of her that wanted a normal life, but she kept at it. But in all honesty, Taylor didn't really want a hunter, and especially not one with that much baggage.

But Julie, the nurse, saw someone in so much pain who needed help very badly, and she couldn't help but try to save him. And along the way…she fell in love. And Dean Winchester, infamous for his love-'em-and-leave-'em lifestyle fell in love with her, too. It was so romantic it made Taylor want to gag.

A knock on the door shocked Taylor out of her thoughts. She walked over to the door and opened it, wondering how many surprises she would have to face today.

Two more, it looked like. Two tall, handsome surprises she once would have been happy to see. Before they got her cousin killed.

Taylor tried to shut the door in Dean Winchester's face, but he stuck his hand out and stopped her. "Tay, let us in," he said in that gravelly voice.

"First of all, it's Taylor to you," she snapped. "And no, I don't think I will."

Sam sighed dramatically. "Come on, Taylor. You're going to want to hear this."

"What makes you think I want to hear anything either of you have to say?" Taylor snapped, glaring at them.

Before either brother could reply, James appeared at her shoulder. "Are these guys bothering you?" he asked darkly.

Dean's eyebrows shot up, half-surprised, half-amused. "Did you finally settle down with a guy, Taylor?" he smirked.

"I'm with Julie, actually," James said confidently. Taylor glanced at him, confused on why he would lie. Probably because he still wanted to be with Julie, after over eighteen months of being apart.

Dean smirked, although his eyes were dangerous. "I don't know who you are, pal, but I know that's not true."

"Really? And how do you know that, smartass?" James snapped, immediately flaring up. Taylor rolled her eyes. They didn't even know they were both former lovers of Julie yet, and they already hated each other.

"Because _I'm_ with her," Dean shot back.

James blinked. "Wait. Are these two…?" he asked Taylor.

"Yup."

James suddenly lunged towards Dean before Taylor grabbed his arm, trying to hold him back, until Sam just shoved him away. "You got her _killed_!" James snarled angrily. "You got Julie killed, and you have the _nerve _to show your face _here_? She's dead because of you-"

"No, she's not, actually," a familiar voice said, and Julie stepped calmly out from behind Sam where she must have been waiting to make an entrance like that. Taylor and James stared at her, wide-eyed and open-mouthed. Julie smiled weakly and said, "Surprise!"

* * *

><p>"So let me get this straight," Jasper said slowly for the third time. "An angel, who is also Dean's best friend, brought his angel army into hell and saved you?"<p>

Julie sighed. "Yeah. Cas and his followers stormed where I was being kept and got me out."

"An angel," James said slowly. "I've never even met one."

"Stick around, buddy, and you just might," Dean muttered. James glowered at him, hating the superior tone that he was using. Actually, James just hated Dean. Everything about him: his stupidly handsome face, his arrogant attitude, the way he sat with his leg pressed against Julie's, the fact that she had died to save him…

"How long ago was this?" Jasper asked.

"I woke up in a grave two days ago," Julie admitted.

"And you couldn't have _called_?" Taylor snapped. She was not handling this nearly as well as Jasper or James. James hadn't really had time to adjust to the thought of Julie being dead before she suddenly wasn't, anyway.

"I wanted you guys to actually see me and believe me," Julie explained. "And…it was more dramatic."

Sam snorted and Julie tried and failed not to smile. However, the three other hunters sitting on the couch across from them did not smile.

"Look, guys, I know it must have been rough this past month," Julie said carefully after a long silence.

"_Rough_?" Jasper repeated incredulously. "Julie, you were practically my daughter, and then a month ago, these men walk in here saying you're dead, and then they call later and tell me you're actually in _hell_? That's not _rough_, Juliet."

"I know," she said quietly. "I'm so sorry. But…I'm back now, so everything's okay, right?"

"_Is_ everything okay?" her uncle asked, concerned. "I mean, Juliet…you were in _hell_. Most people aren't _okay_ after that."

Julie looked down, and Dean put his hand on her leg in a gesture of comfort that made James want to punch that bastard in the face. Was Julie really going to stay with the man who had just gotten her killed?

"I…I will be," she said carefully. "It'll just take some time. The important thing is, I'm alive now. So whatever happened before doesn't really matter anymore. Whatever you were feeling towards Sam and Dean, whatever I went through…we just need to move on."

"Oh, come on," James laughed. "You can't be serious. That guy next to you? He and Shaggy over there got you _killed_, Julie! And now you want us to pretend that all never happened?"

"Look, Jim-" Dean started to snap.

"It's James."

"Like I give a damn. Jasper? He can be as pissed at me as he wants. Taylor? She can want to claw my eyes out, and I won't blame her. But you've got no right to get so upset, Jimmy-"

"It's _James_," he growled. "And you know what? I've got as much right as anyone to be upset. She was the woman I loved for six months-"

"_Was_ being the key word there."

James moved like he was going to get up and start a fight, so Julie stood abruptly. "You know what? I think we should have lunch."

"I already ate," James muttered sullenly.

"Then you can sit quietly and pout while the rest of us eat. Dean, why don't you and Jasper help me cook?"

Dean shot James one more death glare before following his girlfriend and her uncle into the kitchen. As soon as the door shut, Julie whirled on him. "Alright, now you're going to shut it and listen," she snapped in a quiet, intense voice. "You're an adult, Dean, not a bad rip-off of that stupid love triangle in Twilight. So start acting like it."

"Did you hear him?" Dean protested.

"Yeah, I did, and I heard you too. Now make some sandwiches and keep your pretty mouth shut."

Jasper smirked for the first time all day, and Julie turned her attention to him as Dean went to work making food. For a moment, uncle and niece stared at each other in silence. Then Julie said softly, "Look, Jasper-"

"Don't," he said suddenly as he crushed her in a hug. "Just let me be glad you're alive before you start driving me insane."

Julie laughed, but it came out breathlessly as she tried not to cry. They embraced for a long time before Jasper released her and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Scare me like that again and I'll kill you," he muttered, and then they both laughed a little.

Julie looked over and saw Dean smiling slightly as he watched them out of the corner of his eye. Jasper followed her line of vision and his jaw tightened visibly when he made eye contact with Dean.

Julie could sense the tension in the room and knew there was a lot of unspoken business between these two men. "You know what, I'm going to go make sure Tay and James aren't killing Sam," she said, and then she quickly started to leave the kitchen. Just before she left though, she added, "Uncle Jasper, I know you're mad at Dean for what happened to me, but you need to know something. It wasn't his fault. I was the one who chose to go back, and I was the one who chose to die for him. There's nothing he could have done to stop that."

For a moment, Dean and Jasper both stared at Julie, unable to speak. Then she turned and left without another word, forcing them to talk through their issues.

Dean turned back to the tomatoes he had been slicing. Jasper stood there awkwardly for a moment, and then he said, "So…she's back."

Dean stopped making food and turned to face Jasper, making sure to set the knife down before starting this tense conversation. "Yeah. Yeah, she is."

"Bet you were happy."

Dean smirked almost bitterly. "I was pretty far gone, and just getting worse. Too much longer and…I don't know what I would've done." Picked up the Blade again, hunted down the Knights and killed as many as he could before one of them killed him or he went full dark-side, probably.

"You're not going to send her away this time, are you?" Jasper sounded slightly defeated.

Dean sighed. "No. No, I…I need her. I know that now. And besides, she's not safe away from me anymore. She's as much a target as Sam and I. Might as well have safety in numbers."

"And she couldn't leave you if she tried."

Dean looked down, smiling ever so slightly. "And I doubt I could make her."

After a moment, Jasper said firmly, "Good." Dean glanced up, surprised. "Dean, when my Juliet died to save you, I wanted to hate you, I really did. But any man she loves enough to die and go to hell for without a second thought…any man who loves her like you do…you two should be together. Besides…she's okay now. That's what really matters."

Dean nodded gratefully. "So…are we good then?"

"Oh, hell, no," Jasper said, and Dean blinked, surprised. "You'll need to do a whole lot of groveling and household chores and make some pretty kickass sandwiches before we're 'good.'"

Dean smirked. "Well, I can do the sandwiches at least."

Jasper put his hand on Dean's shoulder. "That'll do, I suppose." Both men smirked slightly and went to work preparing lunch together, slowly and tentatively rebuilding their relationship as the day wore on.

Taylor wasn't much for expressing her feelings, but after lunch, she pulled Julie and gave her a long hug. "Do something stupid like die for a boy again and I'll kill you," she muttered, and Julie was struck for once at how alike she and her father were.

Julie laughed. "You couldn't if you tried, Tay," she shot back, and there was no argument there.

After lunch, the six of them played some cards. Although Taylor never quite came out and said it, she slowly forgave Dean as the day wore on. By that evening, there was a familiar, easy routine between the three Carters' and the two Winchesters'. But there was still James on the outside.

It wasn't like they didn't try to include him. But he sat there, pining after Julie and glowering at Dean, making it hard to say much of anything to him. Sam tried valiantly, but James' dislike of Dean seemed to carry over to Sam, even without him knowing how Sam had once felt about his ex-girlfriend.

Still, it wasn't until that night, after most people had gone to their respective bedrooms for the night, when Dean went downstairs for a beer that the tension between him and James came to much of anything. Dean stopped abruptly in the kitchen when he saw James standing in front of the fridge, getting his own beer out.

James turned around and his expression darkened when he saw Dean standing a couple feet away. "Almost done there, pal?" Dean smirked, unable to not be snarky and condescending to this guy. He remembered once, on a dock in the town where Julie had lived when he met her, they had sat and talked about past relationships. And this had been the guy she had loved the most. Six months she had spent with this man, and although Dean had spent twice that amount of time with Julie, the thought of her sleeping with this annoyingly attractive blond guy pissed him off.

"I know you think you're tough, Winchester," James snapped. "But I'm not exactly a pushover, either, and Julie's not really around at the moment, so I don't have a lot of reasons not to break your face in."

Dean smirked. "Hey, sorry, buddy. I was just making conversation."

"You know, you're a little smug for the guy that actually got her killed and sent to hell," the other man said darkly, and Dean couldn't help it; he flinched slightly.

"You're about the last person I need reminding me of that," Dean snapped.

"Why are you still with her?" James asked, surprising Dean. "Taylor told me why you two broke up in the first place, right before she died. Supposedly, you were trying to keep her safe. Well, obviously it didn't work out so well, but now that she's back to life, you're just going to risk her dying again?"

"I can't keep her safe by sending her away. She proved that. So, I might as well let her stay where she belongs."

James snorted. "You got something to say?" Dean asked darkly, crossing his arms.

"She doesn't belong with you. You're not good for her."

"And you're any better?" Dean shot back.

"At least with me she was safe _most _of the time!" James snapped. "And she was happy, too. We could have settled down and had a more normal life. She can't have that with you."

"In case you can't remember, she didn't _want _that with you," Dean said coldly. "She told me she wasn't sure she ever even loved you."

James looked stung, and for a minute, Dean almost felt bad. He knew what it was like to be hung up on this girl. But then James shot back, "At least I would've taken care of her. I wouldn't have let her get killed."

Before he quite knew what had happened, James was pinned against the wall, a very pissed Dean Winchester grabbing the collar of his jacket. "I didn't _let _anything happen to her," he growled in a terrifying voice. "If I could have stopped that, if I could have died instead, I would have without a second thought."

There was a moment of silence. James was staring at the terrifying man before him, trying very hard not to be scared by the darkness in his eyes. And then a woman's voice cried, "Dean, let him go!"

Dean hesitated for a second, and then released James and stepped away. Dean didn't look away from James as Julie appeared at his side, wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt and still looking beautiful, somehow. James couldn't meet her disapproving eyes.

"You two are adults, right?" she snapped after a moment. Neither man said anything. "Then start acting like it. Dean, go back to our room."

"But-"

"No buts! God, I sound like your _mother_. Now go to bed."

James smirked, and Dean shot him a death glare before storming off to their room. "And wipe that stupid look off your face," Julie added with a glare at James. He immediately stopped.

"Julie, look, I-" James started.

"I really _don't_ want to hear it," Julie muttered. "What I want is to go to bed, honestly. But when it took Dean seven minutes to get a beer, well…I could guess what was going on."

"Why are you with that guy?" James snapped suddenly. "He's not good enough for you."

Julie laughed darkly. "You don't want to start with me, James."

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I just don't get it. You deserve a _nice_ guy."

"Dean is nice. Probably not to you, but I think you could understand why."

"You deserve a guy you could settle down and have a life with, Julie," James said gently, stepping closer to her.

She took a step away. "That guy isn't you either, James. You're a hunter as much as he is."

"But I would've given it up for you," he insisted.

"Well, I wouldn't have," she said flatly. "Besides, that was a long time ago. It's been…over a year and a half now, hasn't it?"

"I don't care," James said. "Julie, I still care about you. A lot. And even if you don't want to think of me in a…_romantic _way anymore, at least think of me as a friend who's looking out for you. That guy is trouble, Julie. He and his brother are dangerous. They got you killed once, and who's to say it won't happen again?"

"You know what? It probably will. But if I die again, it'll be with the people I love, doing what I'm best at, trying to do good. And that's not your decision to make, or Jasper's or Dean's or anybody's. That's mine."

James shook his head. "You always were a headstrong, stubborn bitch when you wanted to be," he muttered, but when Julie looked at him, he was smiling fondly.

Julie shook her head, smiling slightly. Although her feelings for James had faded away over time, she still had fond memories of him. She had cared about him a lot, but never the way she felt about Dean, or even Sam, if she was being honest. Maybe she really did have a death wish, but it seemed that she really only could love the people most likely to get her killed.

"And you always had trouble with letting go," Julie said softly. James looked down. "You have to. You know that, right? James…please _try _to move on. You're a great guy, and I want you to be happy. Find a nice girl who can really love you, someone who actually does want to quit this life with you. I'm just…I'm not the one for you."

James sighed. "Just…promise me you'll take care of yourself?"

"I've been taking care of all three of us for months," she smirked, before returning to the motel room where Dean Winchester waited.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Dean and Julie woke up, showered and got dressed, and walked downstairs, ready to go. Julie stopped at the bottom of the stairs, smiling slightly at the picture before her.<p>

Sam and Jasper were chatting happily in a corner, swapping old hunting stories and laughing. James was drinking a beer at nine o'clock in the morning (Julie must have a think for borderline-alcoholics), and he was talking to Taylor, who was back to her old, sexy self. She was laughing at something he had said, genuinely laughing. Not the fake laugh she used to get laid. Julie smiled at James, and he nodded once.

Who knows? Maybe there was something there with James and Taylor, after all that time that Taylor's cousin had dated him.

Sam, Dean, and Julie said their goodbyes and drove back to the bunker. As much as they would have liked to go on relaxing, they had given themselves one day to just take a break. But now, it was time to get to work once again. And they were calling in the big guns.

Castiel arrived at the bunker first. Although he was no longer suffering from his wound, thanks to Hannah and the rest of his remaining followers, Cas seemed strangely detached and quiet.

"Everything alright, Cas?" Dean asked his old friend once they got past the pleasantries.

"Yes, it's just…" Cas sighed. "I lost a few more followers after saving Julie. They think my judgment is clouded if I would let angels die trying to save one human."

Julie looked down, ashamed. Not only had Cas risked everything to save her, but he was losing some of his precious few followers because of it.

Dean gently touched Julie's shoulder, knowing what she was thinking. "I'm sorry, Cas," he said after a moment. "But I can't say I regret what you did."

"Nor can I," the angel replied.

Sam reentered the room, with Crowley following him. The former king of hell looked hilariously short next to Sam Winchester. His eyes landed on Julie and he smirked slightly. "Well, look at you! Juliet darling, you look excellent, considering you should be dead."

Julie decided to let that Juliet slide just this once. "You would know, wouldn't you, having sent me to my death?"

"I do regret that," the demon said, seemingly honestly. "If I could've prevented it…"

"You could've prevented it, but you didn't," Dean snapped. "Now, I'm willing to let that slide because she's okay now, and because we're going to need your help and the Blade to stop the Knights. But pull something like that again-"

"I saved all three of you!"

"You got her killed!"

"That's enough," Sam snapped, silencing the two bickering men. "We've got work to do, and we don't need to be fighting with each other."

"Thank you!" Crowley sighed dramatically.

"Don't think I'm not angry with you," Sam snapped, turning on the demon. "But, as it always seems we do…we need you. So I'm willing to work with you, but if you ever try to hurt Julie or Dean or any of us…"

"You'll kill me, I know," the demon muttered. "Alright then, you bunch of drama queens. What exactly do you need me here for? I'm assuming it's not just to argue."

"We're getting rid of these Knights once and for all," Dean snapped. "And unfortunately, we'll need a demon's insight to figure out how."

"I know how we can kill them all," Crowley said brightly. "You take up that First Blade and we'll find them for you and a quick fight scene later, we're done!"

"It won't be that easy," Castiel muttered.

"No, of course it won't," the demon muttered. "It never is with you boys."

There was a beat. "And there's no other way to kill the Knights?" Julie asked, desperate for any way to end this without having to watch Dean take up the First Blade.

"Not that we know of," Sam sighed. "And it seems like all we've done for the past who knows how long is look for another way."

There was a long silence. Finally, Dean said gravely, "So we find the Knights. Cas, Crowley, you two keep on the lookout for them, and we'll keep searching. Any sign of them, you call us, or we'll call you, and you can get me the Blade, Crowley, and we can end this."

Sam's fists clenched. Julie looked down and bit her lip. Castiel frowned. Crowley's expression stayed carefully neutral. Dean looked around at the four of them and sighed. "You know that's how it has to be, guys," he said in a defeated voice.

"We can keep looking," Sam said weakly, not believing himself. "There may be another way."

"There's not, Sammy, and you know it."

"What about Cain?" Julie pointed out. "Couldn't he kill them if we got him the Blade?"

"He didn't kill them before; what would make him do it this time?" Crowley pointed out.

The five of them were silent again. "It'll be okay, guys," Dean said, his eyes on Sam. "I'll be ready for it this time. And you…you can help me stay…human."

Julie put her arms around Dean and buried her face in his chest. He stroked her hair as he kept his eyes on Sam and a thousand unsaid words passed between the two brothers.

"We can do this," Dean said confidently. Julie pulled away from him and nodded at him. Sam gave him the weakest of smiles, and even Castiel seemed to agree. Crowley continued to keep his face carefully neutral, but Dean knew this was what the demon wanted.

They were all okay with this. That was the important thing. It was the right thing to do, and every single one of them knew it. And that was what mattered.

It didn't matter that Dean knew he wouldn't be ready for the Blade, that he knew he wouldn't be able to control it or himself. What mattered was that he was going to do the right thing.


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty-Three**

Dean didn't glance up from the thick, dusty volume he was reading when he heard footsteps coming into the room. He was sure it was just Sam or Julie, concerned about him, trying to get him to eat or leave the bunker or do _something _besides sitting here reading the same books over and over.

They didn't understand though. Ever since deciding to take up the Blade once they found a Knight, something in Dean had changed. He had already resigned himself to the fact that he was going to soon be slowly losing himself. So he was burying himself in his work, trying to find a way to slow the change the Blade and Mark combined would make in him, and how to find the Knights of Hell as well.

He didn't want to admit it, but he was also trying to get Sam and Julie used to the idea of slowly losing him. Dean didn't know how this was going to end, but most likely, it wouldn't end well for him, and he wanted them to be able to move on when it did.

Julie stopped in the doorway of the library, shaking her head. He was sitting there, hunched over a book like he had been three hours ago, when she had checked on him last. This was a different book at least, but he had read it before; all three of them had.

Julie sighed and walked over to Dean. She rested her hand on the table, next to Dean's arm, waiting for him to look up. He didn't.

"You've read that book three times, Dean," she said coolly after a moment. "Is it really more interesting than me?"

"Sorry, Jules," he sighed, looking up finally and running a hand through his hair. He looked so exhausted. She frowned.

"Are you even sleeping?" she asked him, sitting on the table to get a better look at him.

"Are you?" Dean shot back.

Julie was silent for a moment. "Dean, what are you doing?" she asked suddenly.

"I'm trying to find a way to find these Knights, or something that'll help me with the First Blade or the Mark of Cain…something…"

He sighed. He knew it was hopeless, and so did she. But Julie was never going to say that, not when he looked this defeated already.

"Cas and Crowley are out there looking for the Knights," she reminded him gently. "There's not much we can do to find them, though. We just have to wait."

"Waiting is not my style," Dean muttered. "So I'm just trying to keep busy, feel like I'm actually doing something."

He went back to his book, and Julie frowned. Something was odd about Dean. It was almost like he was trying to shut her out or something.

She took a deep breath and said seriously, "Dean, I've been back from hell for…what? Ten days? But I already feel like you're trying to…to shut Sam and I out, and I just…I can't lose you."

Dean looked up from the book, concerned. "Jules, honey, you know I would never-"

"I know," she said softly, putting her hand over his. "I guess I just…I'm worried about you. Sam and I both are."

"I'm okay, really," Dean started weakly, but he gave up when he saw how disbelieving her expression was.

"What is this about, really?" she asked pointedly.

He couldn't tell her, he couldn't scare either of the people he loved most with the dark thoughts he was having. So he did what Winchester's did best: he lied to somebody he loved to protect them.

"Beelzebub," Dean said darkly. "Yeah, I know we need to stop all of the Knights, but he's the leader, the brains of the operation. And also…he killed you, and he tortured you for ten years. I can't rest until he's dead, Julie."

Julie frowned. "Look, Dean…I know he's awful. God, I know that better than just about anyone. But…I don't want to see you destroy yourself over this need for revenge. I just got you back, Dean. Can't we just…can't things just be normal for a little bit?"

Dean wanted to list all the reasons why they couldn't, but it was _her_. His expression softened, and he finally closed his book. He stood up, and so did Julie. "Normal? Really? With _us_?" he smirked, slowly drawing her closer.

"As normal as things can be, when you're hunters," she amended, repressing a sigh as Dean gently brushed her hair behind her ear. "Sam found a case earlier today."

"Really?" Dean asked, surprised. "With the Knights?"

"No, a normal case. It looks like a haunting, and it shouldn't be too difficult of a case. But it's a nice break, a distraction." He looked skeptical, so Julie added, "A chance for things to be normal again. The way they were before I…" She looked down, and Dean was so eager to change the subject off of Julie's death, that he sighed and gave in.

"Alright. Where is this 'normal' case, anyway?"

Julie's expression darkened slightly. "You're going to love this…" she muttered.

* * *

><p>"Al<em>right<em>," Dean chuckled as he pulled into the limited parking of the sorority. "Don't you just love it when ghosts hunt sororities, Sammy? All these scared, slutty party girls…"

Julie smacked his arm as he tried to park, and he nearly rear-ended a car. "Hey! No hitting the driver!" he protested.

"Fine, I'll wait until we get out of the car to kick your ass," she muttered. Although she knew that Dean was joking, it still got under her skin when her hot boyfriend joked about liking other women. Even though half of these girls couldn't even legally drink, very few of them would pass up a chance to sleep with someone as hot as Dean, even if he had fifteen years on some of them. And, as they got out of the car, two pretty brunettes in shorts and skimpy tank tops walked past, and they both winked at Sam and Dean and then giggled flirtatiously.

There couldn't have been a ghost in a guy's dorm or something, huh? Although that still could have been a problem; on more than one occasion, Julie had to practically beat gay guys off her boyfriend. There were definitely perks to having a very attractive boyfriend, but it had its downsides…

"Hey, asshole!" a girl yelled, and the three of them turned to see an attractive young dark-haired woman in a tank top and skinny jeans marching over. She had big, dark eyes, a sexy body, and a pretty face. The kind of girl Sam and Dean used to sleep with all the time when they were younger. "Watch where you're parking! You almost hit my…."

She stopped abruptly as she took in Sam and Dean. Her eyes lingered on Sam, and Julie sighed in relief internally. Then the pretty young woman smiled suddenly.

"Sorry," she said a little breathlessly. "That was rude. I'm just, uh…I'm a little tense at the moment."

She was still staring at Sam, and he smiled back slightly. "Sorry about that. My brother's a pretty bad driver."

When the young woman wasn't looking, Dean kicked Sam pretty hard in the shin. There were few things about himself Dean actually took pride in, and his driving was definitely one of them.

The young woman laughed. "Well, that's okay. Doesn't really matter anyway. No harm, no foul." She held out her hand to shake Sam's. "I'm Leah by the way. Leah Jamison."

"Leah Jamison?" Sam repeated as he shook her hand. "Hang on. Were you roommates with Kelsey Bryant and Mia Holt and-"

"Olivia Nelson, yeah," she said quietly, her smile suddenly gone. "How did you know?"

"We're police," Dean explained, stepping forward. "We're investigating the murders of your roommates."

Leah looked them over. "You don't look much like cops."

"Strictly speaking, we're off duty," Julie explained, stepping forward. "It's really more for sentimental reasons that we're investigating. I went here a few years ago, and when I heard there was a suicide followed by two murders all in the same dorm within a month of each other…well, you can see why I'd want to investigate." Julie held out her hand. "I'm Julie, by the way. Julie Sanders, and this is my boyfriend, Dean Hansen and his brother, Sam."

"Wait. Which one's your boyfriend?" Leah asked, slightly concerned.

Dean put his arm around Julie's waist and kissed her briefly. Julie smirked. "Does that answer your question?"

Leah smiled slightly, glancing back at Sam. But then her expression darkened as some thought hit her.

"Is something wrong?" Sam asked her gently.

"No, it's…it's nothing," she laughed weakly. "It's just…my roommate, Mia. She would have been all over you, Sam. She had a thing for really tall guys, and…" Leah laughed weakly, but all three of them could see the pain fresh in her eyes.

Sam wanted to comfort the poor girl. "Leah, I'm…I'm sorry for your loss. Really. I know what it feels like to lose someone really close to you. Several people, actually."

"It was the most awful thing," Leah said quietly, and this bright, sunny sorority parking lot seemed too happy a place to be discussing such dark, sad things. "When Liv…when she overdosed…it was so awful. Mia and Kelsey…we were all each other had. And then, Kelsey…she…" Leah covered her mouth with her hand and tried to blink away her tears.

Sam touched her shoulder in a comforting gesture. "I'm so sorry, Leah. Look, we don't have to do this here. Would you rather do it inside?"

"No, god, no," she said quickly. "Three of my best friends have died in that room in the last month. I don't want to go in there anymore than I have to."

Dean and Julie shared a look. They both felt awful for this poor girl, but they needed to get into that room. It was very likely the place of a haunting.

"Okay," Sam said in an understanding tone. "That's fine, Leah. Listen, I know this is hard to talk about, but…do you think…could you tell us how you think your friends died?"

Leah swallowed. "Well, Olivia…her boyfriend was cheating on her. With three other girls. When she found out, she was devastated. I mean, she loved Trevor. And we tried to be there for her, but she wanted to be alone, so Mia and Kelsey and I went out and when we came back…she had overdosed. She was dead before the doctors even got there."

Leah wiped the tears away from her eyes. "Then Trevor got hit by that car, you know, except the cops could never prove that anyone had actually been in it when it hit him. There was no evidence of someone being in the car. And then, three weeks later, Kelsey was home alone. I don't know what happened, but when I got back late from a party, she… she was in the bathtub, drowned. But…the police think someone forced her from the way she was found. And then, a week ago, Mia…she got thrown out the window. She… it could have been a suicide, she could have jumped, but some kids say they saw someone standing in the room like they pushed her out."

She turned away because she was crying. Sam wanted to comfort the poor girl, but there was only so much he could do. "I'm so sorry for your loss," he said as gently as he could. "I…my girlfriend got killed, too. And both my parents. I've lost my fair share of friends, too, so…I know how hard it is."

Leah sniffed and turned back to them, red-eyed. "You know, it's funny," she said in a surprisingly stable voice for someone who had gone through so much. "I've been hearing that a lot, 'I know what you're going through' and so on. But…that's the first time anyone's ever said that and I actually believed them."

She and Sam stared at each other for a long time, some unspoken communication passing between them. Then Leah's expression changed slightly. "You know what? I think I can actually do this. Why don't I take you guys up to the room?"

The three hunters looked around the dorm room. It was very bare, with three of the girls' stuff having already been removed, and Leah, it turned out, was also moving out. Her clothes and other personal belongings were packed up in boxes against the wall. Only her bed remained unpacked, since she was spending one last night here in the dorm room before moving out. With practically everything gone, normal cops wouldn't be able to find any evidence anyway. But Sam, Dean, and Julie weren't looking for normal evidence. They were looking for EMF or other signs of ghosts, and Dean pretty quickly picked up some EMF signals.

The three of them quickly formed a plan. Dean and Julie would go to the cemetery where the body of Olivia Nelson was buried to salt and burn her. If that didn't stop the killings, they would have to do more research, but most likely it was Olivia. All three hunters had encountered ghosts who had committed suicide, and often they remained to haunt friends or foes, trying to punish those who were cruel to them or convince loved ones to join them. When they had heard that Trevor, the cheating boyfriend had died, and then that two loved ones of Olivia had been killed, it became pretty obvious what was going on.

As for Sam, he was left to keep an eye on Leah. He took her out for a late dinner, trying to keep her out of the haunted dorm room. They sat and talked for a couple hours. Sam found her surprisingly charming and easy for him to identify with. She was a very smart girl, having gotten into college on a full ride, like him. She was a senior, and she had been at the top of her class until a month ago, when she had quit trying as slowly all of her friends began to die. Still, despite all she was dealing with, she had a good sense of humor and made a few jokes even though anyone else probably would have been sitting there in a shocked, grieving silence. She was tough, smart, funny, and very pretty, and gradually, as the night went on, Sam found himself increasingly more attracted to her. He was a little old for her, considering the ten year age gap, but he couldn't help it.

And it seemed that Leah was developing a crush on Sam, too. As the night wore on, she found herself staring into his eyes for too long, or laughing too hard at the funny things he said. Around ten o'clock, when Sam brought her back to the dorm, for a second it seemed Leah might invite him in. But then she remembered this was the room where three of her best friends had died in the last month, and how selfish it would be to be having sex with a guy in here, no matter how hot and intelligent and kind and understanding he was. So Leah said goodnight to Sam and shut the door before he could try to stop her from being alone in there.

Sam waited outside the dorm building, trying not to look like a stalker. He just wanted to keep an eye on the window of Leah's room. It was the best he could do for now. He felt infinitely more relieved when Dean called around midnight to say that the bones had been taken care of, and that Leah should be safe.

Sam had given up and was turning to walk away from the dorm building when he heard a faint scream.

Instantly, he was running inside the building for Leah's room. In the thirty seconds it took him to get to the door, things had not gone well, though.

Leah had been about to drift off to sleep when she felt a cool wind stirring her hair. She sat up, confused, and found herself staring at a pale, emaciated version of the once beautiful Olivia Nelson. Her long blond hair was stringy, and her pretty face was pale and sunken. Olivia's eyes were shiny with tears, and she said in a weak voice, "Leah, come with me."

Leah screamed, horrified at this ghostly figure before her. The figure flickered and disappeared, and Leah sat there in bed, clinging to her sheets, shaking and breathing heavily.

Then suddenly she was being pulled out of bed, kicking and screaming, by some invisible force. Leah thrashed around until she got a grip on one of the legs of her bed and she held tightly to it.

"Come with me, Leah," Olivia's raspy voice whispered in her ear, and an icy hand pried her fingers off the leg of the bed.

Leah screamed again, terrified, as she was dragged across the room into the bathroom. Olivia appeared over her as she cowered on the floor, terrified, tears streaming down her face.

Olivia pointed with a shaking hand towards the toilet. "Leah, don't you love me?" the ghost whispered, crying silently. "Then come with me."

"No," Leah whispered. "No, please. Help! _Help!"_

The ghost was forcing her towards the toilet, and for all her struggling, Leah was useless. Icy hands were pushing her head towards the water, her dead friend was going to drown her, and all the time, Olivia was whispering, "Come with me, Leah. Come with me."

Suddenly there was a loud crash. Leah was so terrified she didn't realize until much later it was the sound of a door being kicked down. But just as the ghost of Olivia was about to force her head underwater, there was a gunshot, and the ghost vanished.

Leah scrambled away from the toilet, and someone caught her just before she stumbled and fell. Leah looked up and saw Sam there, saying, "Hey, it's okay. You're okay. I've got you."

Leah sobbed in relief and buried her face in his jacket. For a moment, Sam wrapped his arm around the poor girl and held her while she sobbed, but he knew this wasn't over. The ghost could be back any second, and she would try to kill Leah again, and probably Sam as well.

"Leah, listen to me," Sam said as gently as he could. "I know this is crazy, and I'll explain as soon as I can, but I need you to tell me—is there anything still around here of Olivia's—anything that she might still be connected to?"

Ten minutes ago, she would have thought he was insane. But after just about being killed by the ghost of her friend, anything made sense. "My necklace," Leah gasped, pulling away from Sam. "She gave it to me a few days before she…"

Sam started to reach for the silver locket, but all of the sudden, Leah screamed, "Sam, look out!"

Olivia had reappeared, and she was pissed. She threw Sam into the wall, and his head cracked on the counter, hard. As he lay there, stunned, Olivia advanced on him, looking to kill.

Panicked, Leah looked around for something to fight the ghost off with, anything. Her eyes landed on Sam's shotgun, the one that had gotten rid of the ghost for a few seconds. Before she really knew what she was doing, she picked up the gun. Leah had dated a gun enthusiast once, and he had taught her how to shoot a shotgun. Good thing, too.

Leah fired the gun, thankfully hitting Olivia and not Sam, and the ghost disappeared again. Sam groggily sat up and said, "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," Leah muttered. "Now what was this about my necklace?"

"Right. Here, can I see it?" he asked, pulling a lighter and what looked like a salt shaker off his belt. As confused as she was, she yanked the necklace off and tossed it to him. Immediately, Sam sprinkled some salt on it and held the lighter to it. They sat there for a few seconds, watching the locket begin to melt.

Leah looked up and screamed as Olivia reappeared in the doorway, really pissed this time. But Sam said calmly, "Sorry about this, Olivia," just as the locket finally melted away.

Olivia wailed as she slowly caught flames and then disappeared into bits of ash. For a long moment, both Leah and Sam were silent. Then Leah slowly turned to face him, shaking slightly.

"Sam, you have a lot of explaining to do."

* * *

><p>"So let me get this straight," Leah said slowly from her position on the end of the bed. "Ghosts are afraid of salt?"<p>

"I just told you that ghosts and monsters and demons and angels are all real, and that I kill them for a living, and _that's _what you're worried about?" Sam smirked.

"Well, if I think too much about that, I'll think I've gone batshit crazy!" she pointed out, and he chuckled lightly.

"It is crazy," Sam sighed, exhausted. He had quickly covered up for that mess back at the dorm room, telling the authorities how he had been walking past the dorm, heard a scream, and run to help. He said he had found some guy trying to hurt Leah and fired a couple times at him, but he had escaped. They gave a pretty generic description of some guy and both feigned being in shock to get out of further questioning. Then Sam had taken Leah back to his room in the motel where he and Dean and Julie had adjoining rooms to explain the real truth. He assumed that Dean and Julie were back and asleep, because he didn't hear any noise inside their room. He would check on them after he got everything sorted out with Leah.

"Olivia…did she kill Trevor and Kelsey and Mia, then?" Leah asked softly, just now realizing what must have happened.

"I'm afraid so," Sam said gently. "But you have to understand…ghosts are born out of violent deaths. And…they get warped to the point where…they're not themselves. Olivia was mad at Trevor when she died, so as a ghost…she killed him. And she wanted to be with you and Kelsey and Mia, but she was dead, and the only way she could find to be with you was…"

"To kill us too," Leah finished. "Wow."

Sam sat down next to her and hugged her briefly. "I'm sorry, Leah. I wish I could have helped all of them, and not just you."

"The point is…the point is you helped me, though," she said, taking a deep breath. "You saved me. So thank you."

"Don't mention it," he muttered.

"No, really, thank you," she insisted. She studied him with those big, pretty, dark eyes. "So…this is what you do all the time? You and your brother and that Julie girl? You just…save people from ghosts and monsters?"

"It's a hell of a job," Sam admitted. "And the health care plan sucks."

Leah laughed, and he allowed himself a small smile. "You're pretty amazing," Sam said, studying her. "When I was your age, I…I lost my girlfriend, and I wasn't able to laugh like that for a while."

Leah's expression softened. "I'm tough, I guess," she said softly. "And I'm sorry. About your girlfriend. That must have been rough."

"It was," Sam admitted. "I really loved her. I was going to marry her, but…she got killed. And it was pretty hard on me. Thank god for my brother, Dean. I would've lost it without him." Sam was reminded of how, only a few days ago, Dean's love had been dead, and the only thing keeping him from completely going to pieces was Sam. They held each other together through whatever hell they endured, as long as they had each other.

"You must get pretty lonely, though," Leah said. "I mean, I know I do. I haven't loved anybody in a couple of years, and I guess you just get…"

"Lonely," Sam finished. "Yeah, I know the feeling."

For a long moment, they stared at each other. Then Leah suddenly leaned in and kissed Sam. He closed his eyes and kissed her back, tilting his head to kiss her better. For a long moment, they just kissed, and then Sam found himself pushing her onto her back, and Leah's hands were sliding up under his shirt, tracing over his chest.

Sam stopped kissing her for a moment when Leah suddenly started trying to undo his belt. It wasn't that he didn't like Leah, he really did. But for a couple months not too long ago, whenever a girl would try to hit on him or want to sleep with him, Sam couldn't find it in him. Of course, that was because he was falling for Julie, and now Sam waited for Julie to pop into his head and make him forget about this funny, tough, smart, pretty girl and how much he liked her.

She never did. Sam smiled a little to himself as he kissed Leah again, hands sliding up under her shirt.

He really had moved on.

* * *

><p>Sam woke up feeling really damn good. It had been quite a while since he had sex with anybody, but last night had been good. Really good. Leah seemed to think so as she rolled over sleepily and nuzzled closer to Sam, kissing his neck.<p>

For a moment, Sam let her, absently stroking her long, dark hair. But then he remembered Dean and Julie. He hadn't seen them since they left to go deal with the remains of Olivia yesterday, and he needed to make sure they were okay.

Sam sighed as he got out of bed, not really wanting to have to return to his life. It had been nice to be a part of Leah's for a day, but that's not who he was. He was a Winchester, and he needed to get to work on stopping the Knights.

"Are you leaving so soon?" Leah smirked, watching as Sam got dressed.

"I'm sorry," he said honestly. "I would stay if I could, but…my brother and Julie and I…we've kind of got a bit of a demon problem on our hands that we should probably get back to."

"That's definitely the weirdest excuse a guy has ever used the morning after," Leah muttered, and Sam smirked. He pulled a t-shirt on and zipped up his jeans before walking over to kiss her briefly.

"Leah, last night…" he started, uncertain of how he should say what he was feeling.

"Was pretty fantastic, can't argue with that," she smirked. "But you have to go. I get it. I didn't expect anything else."

She got out of bed herself and pulled on her pajamas from last night. Sam felt a little guilty, even though she didn't seem upset. He had never enjoyed being the guy who always disappeared in the morning, unlike Dean, who had relished it until he met Julie. He didn't particularly like leaving women behind, especially not women who had lost so much so recently, like Leah.

"You'll be okay?" he asked her uncertainly.

She kissed him briefly before saying confidently, "Yes. I'm tough, remember?"

He smirked before turning to the door that was connected to Dean and Julie's. He knocked once and waited for a response. "Hey!" he yelled when there was no response. "Time to get up, guys! We've got work to get back to."

There was still nothing, not even Julie groaning as she had to get up or Dean swearing at Sam and throwing a pillow at the door, as he often did. Concerned, Sam fished the spare key out of his pocket and unlocked the door.

He and Leah stepped into Dean and Julie's room. It was empty, the beds still made, and no signs that they had ever returned from their mission. Sam's heart sank.

Leah watched, concerned, as Sam grabbed his phone and quickly dialed Dean's number. There was no response, so he dialed Dean's other number, and then his _other _other number. He tried both of Julie's and no one picked up. As the last call went to voicemail, Sam threw his phone onto the bed, frustrated, and put his head in his hands.

"Sam, what's wrong?" Leah asked, concerned.

He raised his head, and she saw real panic and fear in his eyes. "Dean and Julie….they're gone."


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty-Four**

Dean slammed the trunk of the Impala and turned to Julie. "Well, that's one less ghost we'll have to worry about."

Julie stepped closer to him, and he put his arms around her, letting her settle into his side. For a long moment they just stood, taking comfort in each other. "Is everything okay?" Dean asked her gently after a moment.

Julie pulled away and sniffed. "Yeah, sorry. I just…I don't know. I guess I just missed…this."

"You missed digging up a month-old corpse so we can cover it in salt and then light it on fire?" Dean asked in disbelief.

"I miss normal hunting stuff," she said, hitting his arm lightly. "I miss just working a case with you and Sam."

"Yeah, me too," he admitted. Dean gave her a quick peck on the lips. "Come on, Jules. We should get going, make sure Sammy's okay."

"He's probably banging that Leah girl," Julie muttered. "She seemed pretty into him, and vice versa."

Dean chuckled. "You're probably right. Well, either way-"

But Julie would never know what Dean was going to say next, because at that moment, several figures suddenly appeared out of nowhere in a loose circle around Dean and Julie.

Immediately, Julie pulled out her angel blade, and Dean scrambled to get his demon-killing knife. Six or seven men and women in dark clothes stood around them, laughing raucously, and several of them flashed their eyes black, proving that they were demons. Dean leaned so his mouth was next to Julie's ear, about to whisper an attack plan, and then a tan-skinned man with a goatee and dark, clever eyes stepped forward, grinning, as he dragged an all-too familiar figure into the middle of the circle and threw him to the ground.

"Cas!" Dean yelled, throwing caution to the wind. He rushed to his friend's side and pulled the angel upright. Cas's head lolled a little bit, and Dean was filled with rage when he saw the blood on Cas's face and neck.

Castiel's blue eyes opened slightly and he groaned, "Dean, I'm sorry…"

"The hell did you do to him?" Julie snapped protectively at the goateed demon.

"We didn't do anything!" he said innocently. "This was all Metatron."

"What?" Dean growled. "Metatron's out of commission. He doesn't have any power. I made sure of that."

"_Didn't _have any powers," the demon corrected. "But my big brother, he made a deal with Metatron—if he got the angel out of heaven's jail, got him some grace, and got him a new army of rogue angels, he would join us. And, best of all, he knows how to read an angel's mind. So we just got him Castiel here, and our new ally was able to tell us exactly where the infamous Dean Winchester was."

"I'm sorry," Cas repeated weakly. "Dean, I tried to fight him-"

"Don't worry about it, Cas," Dean muttered. "We'll take care of these sons of bitches and then we can worry about him."

"Dean, that's going to be a bit of a problem," Julie muttered, still not taking her eyes off of Goatee over there. She looked torn between hatred and terror.

"What are you talking about?" he said. "We can take a handful of demons, no problem."

"That's Asmodeus," Julie said darkly, nodding towards the demon she was still staring at.

Dean's blood ran cold. "Juliet, sweetheart, you remembered!" the Knight of Hell chuckled, opening his arms for a hug. "Did you miss me, baby? Because I sure missed you."

Cas was standing on his own now, so Dean stepped away from him and moved protectively in-between Julie and Asmodeus. "You so much as go near her, you son of a bitch, and I'll kill you," he snarled.

"It's a good thing you're so pretty, Dean," a woman sighed, and they whipped around to see a beautiful woman with long blond hair, tan skin, and a huge rack step forward. She was one of the sexiest women Dean had ever seen, but he could tell just from the way she stood and the air of pure evil she gave off who she really was, and there was no way he could ever be attracted to that bitch. "You're really quite stupid if you think you can kill us without your First Blade," Apollyon smirked, stepping closer.

Dean, Julie, and Cas all stepped away from her, but Asmodeus was coming at them from the other direction. As the two Knights slowly circled them, Dean realized how truly screwed they were. To think he'd only had Julie back for ten days, and he was going to lose her already.

"My sister here insisted on coming to collect you with me," Asmodeus sighed. "However, she had better watch herself. She's only recently been reinstated as one of us, after you two and Sammy boy defeated her without any First Blade or anything."

Apollyon practically hissed at Asmodeus. "You think you're so high and mighty, do you, brother?" she spat. "You're nothing but Beelzebub's lap dog."

"Still better than his chew toy," her brother smirked.

"Enough!" Apollyon snapped. "This isn't about who is better. This is about making these pathetic humans wish they had never even existed."

"Cas, can you get her out?" Dean whispered, shooting a worried glance at Julie. She was tough and brave, more so than just about anyone, but she was shying away from Asmodeus, shuddering as his dark eyes lingered on her. Dean could only imagine what that demon must have done to her in hell to make her so terrified of him.

"I'm sorry, Dean," Cas said brokenly. It seemed like that was all his best friend could say. "But my grace is starting to fade, and they're overpowering me."

"Fantastic," Dean muttered. Then he addressed the two Knights, "Alright, here's how it's gonna be. You two are supposed to take me to your brother so he can 'make me wish I never existed,' that's fine. I'll go with you, no fighting or anything, and do whatever the hell you demons want. You just let these two go, leave them out of it, and I'll do what you want."

Apollyon and Asmodeus both laughed. "Oh, Dean, I think you'll be doing whatever we want anyway," Apollyon smirked.

"And do you really think I could just let my lovely Juliet leave me again?" Asmodeus pouted. "She and I were so close down in hell. Why, I spent almost every day with you, darling. It was hard to even begin the day until I heard your screams."

Dean wasn't sure which one of them he wanted to kill more. Why, oh _why_ had he decided to wait until they found the Knights to use the Blade? If he had it now, he could murder these evil sons of bitches that had already done so much to hurt the people he loved, and planned to do even more.

"And Metatron is far too fond of Castiel to let him go anywhere," Apollyon added. "I think he wants you to be his new pet, Castiel. He can keep you on a leash and everything to show other angels what happens when you cross the wrong guy."

"Bite me," the angel snapped, and despite how truly screwed they were, Dean smirked slightly.

"Well, this has been fun and all, but we'd better get you three to your new home," Asmodeus said brightly. He stepped forward towards Julie, and Dean drove his knife hilt deep into the demon's heart.

Asmodeus looked down at the blade in his chest and sighed. He waved his hand lazily and Dean flew several feet back in the air and landed hard on his back. Julie shrieked and tried to run to him, but Asmodeus grabbed her arm and pinned her to him, pulling Dean's knife out of his chest to hold to her throat.

Before Dean could even get back on his feet, Apollyon had appeared next to him, twisting his arm behind his back and pinning him. Breathing heavily, Dean met Julie's eyes across the crowd of laughing demons and tried to convey to her that everything would be okay.

He was lying, and they both knew it. Rarely had they been in worse shape than they were right now.

At least Sammy was safe.

Apollyon stroked the side of Dean's face, her long nails, painted black, digging into his skin slightly when she forced his head back to look at her. "What do you think, Asmodeus?" she sighed dreamily. "If I'm a bad enough girl, do you think big brother will let me have this one, even if it's just for a little bit?"

Asmodeus laughed. "You'd have to be pretty damn evil before he let you get your hands on his precious Winchester," the Knight of Hell chuckled darkly. "Beelzebub's going to want to peel the flesh off of that one himself."

Julie thrashed against the demon, the thought of Dean at the hands of the demon who had tortured her for years worse than any pain imaginable. Asmodeus just laughed at her, tracing his thumb across her cheek as he spoke. "Juliet, baby, you don't like it when I talk about pretty boy like that, huh? Well, sweetheart…try and remember what Beelzebub would do to you back in home sweet home. Remember how much agony you were in, how you screamed and begged for death?" This time Dean was the one who fought against Apollyon, the thought of Julie in hell making him crazy.

Asmodeus whispered in Julie's ear, his breath hot against her skin. "You remember all that pain? Well, that's _nothing _compared to what we're going to do to that man."

And before Julie could scream at him or even try to throw him off, two demons lunged forward and grabbed Cas, and without another word, all of the demons vanished, taking their victims along with them.

* * *

><p>Dean leaned his head against the bars of his cell. He was sore from being pushed and kicked and thrown around until the demons finally got bored and tossed him in this cell, and the walls and floor of this prison they were being held in were spreading a deep cold through him. He hadn't slept in over twenty-four hours, and he wanted nothing more than to just rest. But he had much bigger problems than his own discomforts.<p>

It would be bad enough being captured by the Knights of Hell, but then they had to go and take his best friend and his girlfriend, too. The three of them had been sitting in silence for over an hour in their cells, trying not to think about what would soon be happening to them.

Dean wasn't sure if he was relieved or even more upset when someone finally approached their cells. Once he saw who it was, though, Dean knew exactly how he felt: like he wanted to rip this bastard's head off.

"Well, well, well," Metatron chuckled as he stopped to stand in front of Dean's cell. In the cell to Dean's left, Castiel stood up, as did Dean and Julie in the cell to his right. The three of them glared at this treacherous angel, who had never looked happier. "This feels oddly familiar, doesn't it, Dean?" Metatron said cheerily. "Except I was the one behind bars then. You were still a dead man though. Quite literally."

"I have to admit, and this means a lot coming from _me_, but even _I _didn't expect you to stoop this low," Dean growled. "Working with demons? Have you finally given up on trying to at least pretend to be an angel?"

"Heaven doesn't want me? That's fine. Hell does." Metatron shook his head. "And hell wants you too, Dean. These demons have got great plans for you, things even _I _have never dreamed of. But of course, being the moron that you are, you'll put your precious morals above your own life, and you'll refuse to do what they want, and you'll die."

"If those are my options, then I'll take death any day," Dean snarled.

"But what about her?" the angel pointed out, turning to face Julie. "Is her life really worth your morals?"

Dean hesitated, and Metatron grinned, knowing he'd found something. "Say I gave you an offer. You go along with the plans these Knights of Hell have for you, and I'll make sure that your girlfriend goes free. I can even make sure that she and Sam be set aside when the demons start their whole pillage and plunder bit. What do you say, Dean? Doesn't that sound better than having to watch her die?"

"Shut the hell up," Julie snapped at Metatron before turning to Dean. "Ignore him, Dean. You know better than to trust him. And anyway, he doesn't have that kind of power. These demons are probably just waiting until he's served his purpose so they can kill him, too."

"Oh, come on," Metatron said, mock-offended. "I don't have any quarrel with you, Juliet! In fact, I've never done anything to you to make you so…_distrusting _of me."

Julie laughed bitterly. "I don't even know where to start. You took Cas's grace, you made the angels fall from heaven, started a civil war with them, killed hundreds of innocent people and angels, tried to kill Dean, and then you went and joined the Knights of Hell and gave us to them. So it's really more of what have you _not _done to make me distrust you?"

Metatron glared at her. "You know, normally I would admire your spunk, kid. But you seem to make a habit of trusting the wrong people. You trusted the Winchester's, and they got you killed and sent to hell. You trusted Castiel, and you ended up here because of it."

"You haven't exactly proved to be trustworthy yourself, Metatron," Cas said darkly. "All you've ever done is betray your people, your cause, and now your very nature. Allying yourself with the Knights of Hell? And you call yourself an angel of the Lord?"

"Not anymore," Metatron growled. "God's dead, Castiel. Has been for years. He's gone, and he's not coming back, and I and several of my followers know it. We picked the winning side, and you three would have been wise to do the same."

"I've never been one for doing the wise thing," Dean muttered. But before he say anymore to the despicable angel in front of him, two men walked around the corner, chatting amicably.

"Alright, times up, Metatron," the taller of the two demons said in his familiar, pleasant voice. Dean saw Julie visibly flinch at the sound of the Knight's voice, and he wanted, no, _needed _to kill that son of a bitch. "Be a good boy and run along back to your little army," Beelzebub said condescendingly. Normally, Dean would have loved anyone who talked to Metatron like that, but there was no one he hated more than this Knight of Hell.

The angel hesitated for a moment, and it was clear he hated being treated this way. However, he vanished with the sound of flapping wings that accompanied an angel wherever they went, leaving Dean, Julie, and Cas alone with Asmodeus and Beelzebub.

"Sorry about that," Beelzebub sighed. "He really wanted to have a few words with you three, Dean especially, and considering he got us you two in the first place, it only seemed fair to give him a couple minutes. But not to fear, he'll leave you three alone now. Now it's our turn."

The two hunters and angel glared at the Knights in stony silence. Beelzebub sighed dramatically. "Really, boys? Is that how it's going to be? I mean, I guess I can understand Juliet being unhappy with me…after all, she didn't seem to enjoy hell too much. But can't we all just try to be civil? Dean? Can't we just have a conversation like proper adults?"

"You killed Julie, and you tortured her in hell, and you expect me to _talk_ with you?" Dean growled. "The only thing I want to do is kill you, you son of a bitch."

"At least we're talking now," Beelzebub muttered to Asmodeus. "Fine. You don't want to talk? I understand. We'll have plenty of time for that later. We're actually here for Julie anyway."

It took all of Julie's willpower not to back into the corner of her cell and beg for them not to hurt her. Dean's fists clenched as Asmodeus unlocked Julie's cell and advanced on her. "Hey!" Dean yelled. "Leave her alone! It's me you want anyway."

"Actually, I really do want Julie," Beelzebub said calmly, leaning against the door of Dean's cell as he watched his brother grab Julie's arm and haul her out of the cell. "I've missed you, darling," he said with a smile as she was dragged over next to him. "It got awful lonely in hell without my favorite toy, so Asmodeus and I decided we'd go and get you back."

"Get your filthy hands off her!" Dean growled as Asmodeus pinned Julie's arms to her side and teasingly touched the side of her face.

"Oh, calm down, Winchester," the Knight chuckled. "We won't do anything we haven't already done before."

He suddenly hit Julie so hard her head snapped to the side. Dean and Cas both cried out, but they were useless.

Beelzebub smirked. "Perhaps we should continue this somewhere where these poor men don't have to watch. Wouldn't you prefer that, Juliet?"

Julie lifted her eyes to glare at the Knight in front of her. No one could understand the amount of courage and strength it took to meet his eyes, after everything these two demons had done to her. "Bite me," she spat at him, and the king of the Knights of Hell raised his eyebrows, surprised.

"These few days back on earth have been good for you, darling," he chuckled. "The last time I saw you, if I remember correctly, you were sobbing and begging for me to just kill you. Except I couldn't, because you were already dead."

Dean lunged towards Beelzebub, but he was stopped by the bars. Both Knights of Hell smirked at him, and Asmodeus began to haul Julie away, Beelzebub following. Dean broke when they got about ten feet away and started yelling, "No, wait! Leave her alone! Take me, dammit! _Take me_!"

Asmodeus said something to Beelzebub, and both demons laughed. Just before they dragged Julie around the corner and out of sight, she turned and met Dean's eyes. He expected her to give him a reassuring look or try to convince him she would be okay so that he wouldn't worry.

Instead, he saw her blue eyes wide with terror. "Help," she mouthed to him, and then she was gone.

Dean tried pointlessly to kick down his cell door, unable to bear seeing Julie so afraid and unable to help her. Eventually, Dean sank to the ground and put his head in his hands, trying not to imagine what they were doing to Julie.

But it turned out he didn't really have to imagine. Because not even five minutes after she had been dragged away, Julie began to scream. And she wouldn't stop.

Cas watched with pain-filled eyes as Dean tried to block out her screams, but it was useless. This place had been designed so that it was impossible not to hear the screams of the tortured. And so Castiel was forced to watch helplessly as Julie's tortured screams finally became too much for Dean, and his friend silently began to cry.

* * *

><p>Crowley looked up from the row of shots before him on the bar when his phone began to ring. Sighing dramatically, even though there was no one around to hear, he pulled his phone out of his suit jacket and blinked in surprise when he saw the number.<p>

"Something wrong, Moose?" the demon asked in a bored voice as he answered the call.

"Do you have the Blade?" Sam's low voice growled. He didn't sound very happy.

"Do you have a Knight of Hell?" Crowley countered.

"No, but they've got Julie and Dean."

Crowley's eyes widened. "What? Where?"

"I don't know," the man on the other end admitted, sounding anguished. "But they went missing last night, and I found where they disappeared. The place reeks of so much sulfur it had to be at least one Knight, if not more." Sam took a deep breath. "I need your help, Crowley. I've got to find them."

"Why not ask your friend, Castiel?" the demon said airily, trying to pretend he wasn't concerned.

"Cas is missing. I got ahold of Hannah, and found out that heaven's been overthrown by a group of rogue angels led by Metatron. She thinks he's got Cas, and she and the rest of the angels are here on earth with no idea what to do. So basically, everything that could possibly go wrong has, and you're all I've got, Crowley." The demon was surprised. Sam hadn't trusted him…well, ever. The fact that he was desperate enough to beg the former king of hell for help meant things were really bad.

"Alright," the demon sighed. "I can probably find a spell that will find your brother and his girlfriend. I'll have to get the ingredients first, as well as the First Blade."

"How long will that take?" Sam asked.

The line clicked dead.

Sam sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He had been trying to ignore what was going on by always being on the move, always doing something. But now that he had to wait, all he could think of was his brother and Julie and possible Cas at the hands of the Knights of Hell, and it was killing him.

Sam had sent Leah back to her sorority the moment he had known things were really bad. She couldn't get caught up in this mess; she'd die. She had wanted to stay and help Sam find them, but he had refused. There was no way he was having any more innocent blood on his hands.

But if Leah were still here, at least he would have something to distract himself from his dark thoughts. Sam had been tortured by the devil himself; he knew what true agony felt like. So he had a pretty good idea of what Dean and Julie could be enduring right now, and the thought of good, sweet, brave Julie who had just barely escaped hell, or his brother who meant more to him than anything else in this world going through that kind of pain…

Sam blinked, startled, as something slammed onto the hood of the Impala. He turned around and saw that Crowley was back already with several ingredients for a spell. He had slammed a large bundle wrapped in brown cloth onto the hood of the car, and for a second, Sam wanted to throw that weapon as far from here as he could. The thought of it taking over his brother and slowly demonizing him again was awful, but the thought of Dean and Julie at the hands of the Knights was somehow worse.

"Well, Moose," Crowley said gravely. "Let's get to work."

* * *

><p>Julie hadn't screamed in over an hour. Dean wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not, though. For all he knew, she could be dead. They could have killed her again, and Dean hadn't even had her back for two weeks.<p>

"Dean…" Cas tried gently. He had been trying to get Dean to talk for the past three hours, ever since Julie had been dragged away. But Dean had nothing to say.

"Dean, she'll be okay," the angel said, but he didn't sound like he believed himself. "We'll find a way out of here, and then we can get her out of here. We'll all be okay."

Dean lifted his eyes, and the pain in them felt like a knife in Castiel's side. "No, she won't, Cas," he said darkly. "Nobody would be okay after this. After everything they did to her before, in hell."

Cas tried to think of something he could say to comfort Dean, but there was nothing. Dean hadn't seen Julie while she was down there. She had been almost unrecognizable; so bruised and bloody and beaten, so broken, and there was so little of her left that Cas almost hadn't realized it really was Julie. Dean was right. Nobody was okay after hell. He sure as hell hadn't been.

There was a distant crash, and couple seconds later, a groan of pain from the end of the hall. Both Cas and Dean lifted their heads at the sound of the commotion. After a few seconds, they heard footsteps approaching and both of them stood warily.

And then he came running around the corner. Dean wasn't sure whether to grin or panic at the sight of his little brother in such a dangerous place. "Sammy!" he whispered. "What are you doing here?!"

"Saving your ass," Sam muttered, approaching Dean's cell. "You okay?" he asked, eyes wide.

Dean's expression darkened. "Cas and I…we're okay. But Julie-"

"Keys," another voice said, and Dean glanced over and saw Crowley there as well, tossing Sam the keys. Sam quickly unlocked Dean and then moved to unlock Castiel. The four men grouped together, and Sam asked, "Where's Julie?"

There was a beat. "They took her a few hours ago," Cas said when it was clear Dean couldn't even talk about it. "Asmodeus and Beelzebub, they're both here. And Apollyon, somewhere."

"Great," Sam said darkly. "Where's Julie? I'll go find her and make sure she's okay. And Dean…"

He glanced from Crowley to his brother. Dean finally noticed the brown bundle in the demon's arms and swallowed. He knew instantly what it was, and the Mark of Cain on his arm burned, itching for him to hold that weapon once more.

"Right," Dean growled. "Sammy, you and Cas go make sure Julie's alright. Crowley…you and I have some demons to kill."

Sam hesitated, suddenly unable to let Dean take up that Blade. "Dean, wait-" he started.

"Go find the girl before something else happens to her!" Crowley snapped. "I'll watch out for your brother. He's safe with me, remember? I need him."

"We have to go, Sam," Cas said gently, and Sam knew he was right. The two of them turned and went down the hall where, hours ago, Julie had been dragged away. They rushed through several halls, opening every door they found until finally, they found her.

Sam's stomach flipped at the sight of Julie when they finally found her. She was unconscious on the floor of a dark room. There was a drain on the floor which her blood was slowly trickling down, and twisted, horrific torture weapons lined the walls and hung from the ceiling. Julie was pale, one of her legs twisted at a horrifying angle, and there was blood, her blood, all over her face, arms, clothes, and even in her hair.

"Julie," Sam whispered, horrified, before rushing to her side. He carefully sat her up and her blue eyes fluttered open, dull and pained.

"Sam?" she asked groggily in a pained voice.

"It's okay, I've got you," Sam said soothingly. "Cas, can you heal her?"

"My powers are blocked in here," the angel admitted, watching her with sad, tired, guilty blue eyes.

"That's okay," Sam said gently. "We'll get you out of here, Julie. You'll be okay."

"Dean," Julie choked out suddenly, eyes wide.

"He's okay," Sam assured her. "Crowley's with him, they're going to go take care of the bastards who did this to you."

"No," Julie said, panicked. "No, he can't!"

"Julie, he's got to use the Blade. I don't want him to use it any more than you do, but-"

"No, you don't understand!" she cried. "While Beelzebub…while they were torturing me, he told me a bit about their plans. They've got plans for Dean, and they want him to use the Blade. They _want _him to, Sam!"

"What?" Sam said in a low, cold voice, turning to face Cas. He looked as surprised and concerned as the two of them.

"We've got to stop him!" Julie said weakly.

"Let's go," Sam said darkly, carefully picking Julie up and cradling her in his arms. Moving carefully so as not to hurt her further, the three of them set off to find Dean before it was too late.

* * *

><p>Dean knew something was wrong. For one thing, he hadn't run into a single demon in this entire prison. It was deserted, and that should have been a sign to him that he should stop and think. But he couldn't. All he could think of was how these demons had made Julie scream, how they had done that to her for a decade in hell. They could not be allowed to live after that.<p>

He and Crowley ran through the winding hallways of the prison until finally they came across a large room with the doors flung wide open. That should have been another warning sign. They wanted him to come in, but Dean didn't care. They wanted him to kill them? Fine, he'd be glad to.

Dean barged into the room and found himself glaring at Beelzebub and Asmodeus. They had been waiting for him, and that should have been the final sign. He should have fled then, but he didn't. The Mark of Cain on his arm was like a magnet, dragging him towards these despicable demons, and the First Blade, only a couple feet away in Crowley's arms, was calling out for him to take it up once more.

"You got free, Dean?" Beelzebub smirked. "I'm impressed. Sam must have come with Crowley here to rescue you, then. I guess I'll have to kill him too, now."

"You go near my brother and I'll kill you," Dean snarled. "Actually, I'm going to kill you regardless."

"And how do you plan to do that?" Asmodeus smirked. "Nothing's changed, Winchester. You're still powerless against us."

"Not exactly," Dean smirked, and without another word, he turned and yanked the bundle out of Crowley's arms. He threw the cloth to the side and found himself holding the First Blade for the first time in over a year.

And it was like he was coming back to life. New energy and strength poured through his veins, and his heartbeat thudded in his ears, a pounding drum driving him forward. The Mark of Cain was no longer burning—it was at peace now, reunited with the Blade.

And for the first time in over a year, he felt so damn good.

Dean raised his eyes and saw two Knights of Hell before him. He relived Beelzebub beating him, watched that demon kill the woman he loved. He imagined them carving her up in hell like Alastair once had to him, and he heard Julie's agonized screams all over again.

They deserved to die. They were despicable. He was going to murder these sons of bitches, and he was going to enjoy it.

Asmodeus smirked. "What do you know, Beelzebub? It worked."

"Not quite," the king of the Knights murmured. "For it to be complete, he's got to kill."

And before Dean, Crowley, or even Asmodeus could understand what was going on, Beelzebub suddenly whipped out his blade, the one that had killed Julie, and stabbed his brother through the chest. "I am truly sorry, brother," the demon said calmly. "Out of our siblings, I always hated you and Behemoth the least."

Then he pulled the blade out of Asmodeus and vanished.

The Knight of Hell staggered to the side, stunned and weak. Dean knew that should have been warning enough. Beelzebub had just attacked his brother so that Dean would kill him. If that wasn't obvious enough that he shouldn't use the Blade, nothing was.

But it didn't matter. Asmodeus had made Julie sob and scream and bleed. He had tortured her, and he had tortured countless others, and Dean was going to make him pay.

And before the Knight of Hell could recover, Dean lunged forward and drove the First Blade into Asmodeus's heart.

The demon wailed, fiery light bursting out of his eyes and mouth, and then he suddenly went limp. In the silence after the kill, Dean heard a familiar voice cry, "Dean, _no_!"

Dean threw the dead Knight to the floor and turned around. There was Crowley, watching him with an unreadable expression. Castiel stood in the doorway, looking grave. And there was Sam, holding a weak, bloody, beaten Julie in his arms. Both of them were staring at him, horrified.

"Dean, no…" Julie whispered, echoing Sam's words.

Dean stared at them, not comprehending. "Put the Blade down," Sam said as gently as he could.

Dean tried, but he couldn't. It felt so good, so _right _in his hands…what were they upset about, anyway? He had killed a Knight. Only five more! They should be grateful!

"Dean, it's over," Julie whispered. "Put it down."

He wanted to. He really did, if it would make her happy. But his hand wouldn't move. Dean realized he was trembling, and yet he couldn't make his hand release the First Blade.

"Dean?" Cas asked gently. "It's okay. You can let it go now."

"It's over," Sam said softly. "Dean, please."

And finally, agonizingly, Dean dropped the Blade. It hit the ground and the thud echoed through the room. Dean slowly sank to his knees, and Julie watched him, tears in her eyes. She wanted to go to him, but she couldn't even stand on her own.

Sam and Cas exchanged worried glances. What should have been a victory, the death of a Knight of Hell, was clearly not what they had hoped. For some reason, Beelzebub had wanted this, and if he wanted something to happen, it couldn't be good.

Sam, Cas, and Julie watched Dean with worried looks as he slowly realized what had just happened. Then he looked up at them, wearing the same concerned expression they all wore.

Except for Crowley. While the four of them fretted over what this turn of events would mean for them and for Dean, Crowley stood in the corner, smiling.

Everything was going according to plan.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter Twenty-Five**

"Mr. Hansen?" the nurse asked gently.

Sam lifted his head. He had been about to nod off again, even though the chairs in this waiting area were far too small for him. Sam quickly stood up and grabbed his cup of coffee. "Yes?" he asked the nurse, a heavy, middle-aged woman.

"Ms. Sanders is awake now, and I couldn't find either of your friends, so I figured I should let you know. Would you like to see her?" she asked kindly.

"Yeah," Sam said quickly, and the kindly nurse led him to the room. She assured him that "Ms. Sanders" was doing much better before leaving him alone to talk with her.

"Hey, Sam," the woman lying on the hospital bed said as he shut the door behind him. Sam turned to get a better look at her. Julie Carters looked a lot better than the bloody, beaten woman he had brought into the hospital several hours ago, but she was still pale and weak. There were a few stitches on her face and arms, and she had an IV in her wrist. She looked small and frail in that hospital gown, her blond curls wild around her pale face. Still, she managed to smile at him.

"Hey," Sam said gently, coming to sit in the chair next to her bed. "How are you?"

"I've been better," she admitted. "I've also been a lot worse."

Sam sighed. "Look, Julie, I'm so-"

"Don't start, Sam," she said firmly. "We're not going to talk about what happened, okay? We're going to talk about normal people things like…well, like normal people."

"Got an example?" Sam smirked.

"Like…how did things go with Leah?" Julie asked, blue eyes curious.

"Ah, yes, because stopping a ghost from killing a woman is something normal people do."

"Shut up," Julie muttered, and he knew she would punch his shoulder if she wasn't still weak from what she had endured yesterday at the hands of the Knights of Hell. "I meant with the two of you."

"I don't know what you're talking about…"

"Oh, come on, Sam! I like to think I know you pretty well, and you were almost as into her as she was into you." Sam glanced down, but he was smirking. "So? Did anything happen after you heroically swooped in and saved the girl?"

"Maybe," he said, smirking slightly.

"Look at you!" she laughed. "Sam finally got some action!"

"Finally?" he repeated. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means you haven't gotten laid in months," she pointed out.

"Yeah, well, we've been a little busy, and I don't live with someone I can just bang whenever I want, unlike _some _people."

Neither wanted to admit it, but part of the reason he hadn't been sleeping around was her. Julie knew what it meant if Sam had started sleeping with other women again. He had moved on, and she was glad he had.

"I wish I hadn't," Sam muttered suddenly, surprising Julie.

"Was she really that bad?"

"What? No, she was…" Sam laughed awkwardly. "I just meant…if I hadn't been…_distracted_, I would have noticed you two were missing way before. Maybe I could have gotten there before you got hurt or Dean…"

"Don't put that on yourself," Julie said sharply. "It's not your fault, Sam. There's probably nothing you could have done, nothing anything of us could have done to change what happened. The point is…we've just got to figure out how to deal with what happened."

There was a brief silence. "How is he?" Julie asked softly.

"I don't know," Sam admitted. "He won't talk to me. He won't talk to anybody, really. He and Cas went somewhere to talk, I suppose, but I don't know where."

"Does he seem…different?" Julie asked carefully, afraid of the answer.

"Not yet." Sam swallowed and looked down at his shoes. "It didn't…he didn't start to change for a while. He fought it before, and I'm sure he will this time. I just…"

"I know," Julie said softly when Sam couldn't finish his thought. She moved her arm, the one without the IV, so she could rest her hand on Sam's knee. "He's gonna be okay. He knew this was coming, and he's been getting ready. And we'll help him. He won't be alone."

Sam nodded a couple times. He took a long sip of coffee and then sighed. "You're right. We'll take care of him." His eyes lifted to meet Julie's. "What about you? Are you going to be alright?"

"What do you mean?" she said carefully.

"I mean about your nightmares."

Julie blinked. "I don't-"

"You've been able to hide them from Dean somehow, but believe me, I've noticed," Sam said knowingly. "And I imagine they'll just get worse after what happened." Julie looked down at the sheets, unable to deny what he was saying. Sam put his hand over Julie's on his leg and said earnestly, "Julie, I remember what that was like. In fact, I was worse than you. I had hallucinations of Lucifer all of the time, and it got to the point where I started going crazy and my body basically started dying on me. But I got through it, with a lot of help, and I want to help you."

"It's really not that bad, Sam," she protested weakly. "I don't want to worry you or Dean any more than I have to."

"You can't hide things from us to try to protect us, Julie."

"That's literally all you guys do!" she pointed out.

"And how well did that work out for us?"

Julie sighed. "Fine. I'll talk about it with you or whatever else you want me to do, but please…don't tell Dean. The last thing he needs is another thing to worry about."

"You should tell him," Sam said gently. "He'll want to know. He would want to help you."

"He's got enough problems," Julie said. "Besides, I'll be okay. I'll get used to it. You two both did."

Sam sighed and shook his head. "You know, Julie…sometimes it scares me how well you fit in with us."

"I know," Julie said softly, rubbing her thumb across the back of Sam's hand. And Sam sat and talked with her for an hour until she was finally able to drift off.

* * *

><p>The next time Julie woke up, she was feeling significantly better. A nurse brought her a meal, and Castiel came in and talked to her for a few minutes. He told her that Dean seemed to be holding things together well, and that Dean had given the Blade to Cas for safe-keeping. Sam came in, and the three of them discussed this new issue of Metatron and his rebel angles joining the demons. It seemed that the threat only seemed to be growing.<p>

They all carefully avoided the subject of Dean and the plans the Knights had for him. And as much as Julie wanted to ask about where Dean was and why he wasn't in here with her, she restrained herself. Eventually, a nurse came in and asked Cas and Sam to let her sleep. Julie didn't want to sleep, but pretty soon, she couldn't even keep her eyes open anymore.

When Julie woke up, he was there.

He was sitting in the chair next to her bed, his head in his hands. He looked up when Julie pushed herself into a sitting position, and his green eyes met hers.

"Hey," Julie said carefully after a long moment.

"Jules, I…" Dean didn't know how to finish that sentence. I'm sorry? I should have been able to save you? I should never have let that happen?

"Come here," she ordered, and he moved his chair closer. They had taken Julie off the IV, so she was able to put her arms around Dean and rest her head on his shoulder. Dean gave in and hugged her back, and Julie closed her eyes when his solid arms went around her.

"I'm sorry," Dean said after a long time.

Julie pulled away. "No, you're not."

"Um, I'm pretty sure I'd know if I was sorry."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for. It was not your fault that the Knights found us, or that Metatron is back, or that they tortured me…absolutely none of that is your fault, so don't you try to take the blame."

Dean sighed. "God, you take the fun out of everything."

Julie smirked, and he gave her a small smile. "How are you feeling?" Julie asked him after a while, taking his hand and putting it in her lap. As he spoke, she played absently with his fingers and ended up holding his hand.

"I don't know," Dean sighed. "Not as bad as I expected. But I usually feel pretty good right after I kill someone."

Julie twisted the ring on his finger, focusing on his hand and not the Mark burned into his skin or the darkness the First Blade had put in him again. "Not really some_one_," she muttered. "Asmodeus was a monster, and he deserved to die."

"Hey, I'm not arguing with you," Dean said. "But…Cas tells me…Beelzebub told you he _wanted _me to start using the Blade again?"

"Well…" Julie sighed. "He said they've got…_plans _for you, whatever that means. And they all started with you taking up the First Blade again. Look, I don't know what he meant, and he may have just been messing with me. I don't know. But it doesn't really matter. What matters is, we're all okay. Right?"

"Right." Dean brushed the hair out of Julie's face with his free hand and she closed her eyes. His touch was still so gentle and caring, not rough or violent like she had been fearing. He was still him. "The nurses say you should be able to leave tomorrow. They don't know how you could possibly have healed so quickly. Of course, they don't know about the angel that's been healing you whenever they're not looking."

"I didn't, either," Julie admitted. "I guess that would explain how my leg is miraculously not broken." Dean smirked. "You have the best friends, you know that?" Julie said fondly.

"I'd be dead without them," Dean admitted.

They talked for a while about simple, ordinary things, watching the crappy daytime television playing in Julie's room. Eventually, Dean drifted off in his chair, and Julie turned the television off. She watched him sleep until she too drifted off.

* * *

><p>The next day, she was released from the hospital. Sam had gotten her fresh clothes from the Impala, and she got dressed in a navy blue button-down shirt and dark jeans, finally feeling like her old self. Cas had left yesterday to go help his followers regroup and figure out how to deal with Metatron's betrayal, so Sam, Dean, and Julie set out for the bunker, just the three of them. Things would have felt almost normal, if not for the First Blade, wrapped in a cloth again, in the backseat with Julie.<p>

However, they didn't even make it halfway to the bunker before Sam got a call from a fellow hunter. There was a vampire case, and a pretty serious one, in Colorado. There was a nest that had supposedly gone dormant a few years back, and they were killing again. However, the hunter, a guy named Howie Clark was a lone hunter, and there were about ten vampires in the nest. He knew he was in over his head, so he passed the case along to the Winchester's.

The case was only four or five hours out of their way, and Sam and Dean knew they should take it. But there was Julie in the backseat, still not fully recovered from the ordeal with the Knights.

Julie wasn't going to let them ignore a case like this just because of her, and so she insisted they take it. Both Sam and Dean knew better than to try to argue with Julie on something like this, and so the three hunters set out for Colorado for yet another case.

It was a pretty serious case, from the sound of it. This nest of vampires was pretty old and dangerous. They'd been around for at least a century, and several hunters had tried to kill them before, and lost their lives. Every time they killed a hunter, they vanished and didn't resurface for another couple of years, making it difficult for a group of hunters to just go in there and clean them out. However, three completely unrelated humans had gone missing in the past couple of days in a place where this particular nest had resided several years ago, and Howie was pretty certain it was this infamous nest of vamps.

Julie and Sam especially seemed uneasy about this case. If it really was this dangerous nest, they might be biting off a little more than they could chew. But Dean was surprisingly eager to be on another hunt so soon after taking up the First Blade. Julie wasn't sure what to think of that. The Blade would push him to kill more often and more brutally, from what Sam had told her, but as long as he was killing monsters, it shouldn't be too much of a problem.

By the time the hunters rolled into town, it was pretty late. It was already dark out, and they knew better than to try and fight vampires at night, when their vision and senses were heightened. So Dean drove over to a cheap diner, and the three of them stuffed themselves with greasy burgers and over-salted fries, talking and laughing like they hadn't in a while. They hung out at the diner for a couple of hours before finding a motel, on the nicer end of their scale. There were a couple good movies playing on the television, and so Sam, Dean, and Julie settled down on the bed in Dean and Julie's room and watched TV together, letting Dean flip back and forth between movies when one got boring. He practically had them both memorized anyway.

Sam and Julie joked and talked like they hadn't in months, not since he started to develop a crush on her. And Julie had to admit, despite the threat of the Knights always hanging in the air and the dangerous vampires they would soon be fighting and the evil that would soon be taking over the man she loved...she felt good. It was good to hang out with Sam, laughing and teasing Dean and brushing casually against Sam like they used to, and to not have to worry about what thoughts might be going through Sam's head, or to have to focus on controlling her emotions.

She realized she had missed Sam. Not in the same way she had missed Dean, a desperate need to be with him again or she knew she couldn't carry on. But she had missed his smile and his sense of humor and his laugh, rather rare, but warm and genuine.

She had missed this. Just her and her boys, hanging out, making fun of Dean's lack of manners and kissing him until he quit pouting, and Sam being able to laugh about it instead of sitting there watching them jealously. Once it got late and the three of them began to have a hard time keeping their eyes open, Julie hugged Sam for a long moment, and he hugged her back.

"I know I say this a lot, but I am so damn glad you're back," Sam muttered as they pulled away.

Julie smiled at him. Then a mischievous glint came into her eyes. "I missed you too, Sammy."

His eyebrows shot up. "Well, goodnight then, Juliet," he shot back

She shot him an annoyed look, and he shrugged. "Alright, I guess I deserved that," Julie admitted. "'Night, Sam!"

He nodded at her and closed the door connecting their adjoining rooms. Julie sighed and changed from everyday clothes into a camisole and pajama shorts. Dean pulled off his shirt and barely changed from jeans into sweatpants before he was out like a light. Julie smiled fondly at him as she settled into bed next to him. She absently stroked his arm, but caught herself as her fingers brushed dangerously close to the inflamed skin on his forearm.

She could go through a day like that, having fun with Sam and Dean, and she could almost believe it was the good old days again. But things were different now. She had no idea how Dean was actually doing—for all she knew, he could already be halfway down the path that would make him the near-demonic shell of himself Sam and Cas had been forced to leave.

Immediately, Julie pushed those dark thoughts away and tried to sleep. She was still pretty tired, her body still recovering from her ordeal with Asmodeus and Beelzebub. But her mind was not doing a very good job of recovering...

* * *

><p>"<em>I've got plans for lover boy, you know," Beelzebub said calmly, wiping her blood off of his knife. "Very big plans. It's really the only reason he's still alive, a dangerous man like him. I'm going to use him."<em>

"_You stay away from him," Julie said. She meant to snarl defiantly at the demon, but her voice broke on "away," and Asmodeus smirked._

"_Oh, I think we'll do whatever we want to pretty boy, and his brother, once he gets stupid enough to try and save the day," Asmodeus chuckled. "If it's any consolation, I think we'll give your angel buddy to Metatron. I mean, these angels are pretty savage and all, but nobody knows torture like us. Right, sweetheart?"_

"_Bite me," she spat, and this time she was able to keep her voice steady._

"_I've got a better idea," Beelzebub said, and without warning, he drove a burning hot poker into her already broken leg._

_Julie screamed, high and tortured. She had been trying so hard to keep from crying out, knowing that her screams would be their own form of torture for Dean out there, but these demons knew what they were doing. Not only were they the masters of torture, but they had kept Julie in hell for ten years..._experimenting. _They knew exactly what would make her scream or sob, what would hurt her the most, what would get the most pathetic noises out of her…_

"_Why?" Julie choked out, hoping to distract them for a while so they would give her a couple minutes reprieve before they continued._

"_You're going to have to specify, my dear," Beelzebub sighed dramatically._

"_Why_ him_? Why us? Why do you have to torture us, why do you have plans for Dean specifically? What did we ever do to you?"_

"_Besides kill countless demons we tortured and created ourselves, kill our sister, and possess the only thing that could kill one of us?" Asmodeus snapped._

"_To be fair, we didn't even like Abbadon," Beelzebub corrected his brother. "But then again, I don't really like anyone. I guess that's the answer, Juliet. I was created by my lord Lucifer to kill, pillage, rape, torture, destroy…the whole shebang. It's my nature, darling. And when I find people who I know will try to stand against me, people who will bend so ridiculously far before they break…well, I have to at least try to see if I can get them to snap."_

_Julie would shake her head in disgust at him if she weren't so weak. The Knight knelt in front of her and brushed some blood off of her cheek. Julie hated that it was true, but his touch was as familiar as Dean's to her. Maybe even more so._

"_Besides…seeing people as sweet and gentle and good as you, my dear…I always find it so entertaining." He smirked. "People who spend their whole lives trying to be good, to be heroes…those are the people who end up making the best demons."_

_Julie blinked. Beelzebub stood up. "I mean, take me for example! I was an upstanding man. I was courteous, just, hard-working, honest, kind…I had a wife and a daughter I loved so very dearly…" The demon shuddered. "It was quite disgusting. But I thought I was happy. And then my wife and child died of a plague. I was heartbroken, so filled with pain that I was ready for life to end. And then my lord appeared, and he offered to take away all the pain…"_

_Beelzebub smiled peacefully. "You have no idea, Juliet, how hard and painful and _insignificant_ human life is until you've moved on. Every time I threaten your Dean, or whenever I torture you…that pain you feel? It all goes away. You don't feel guilt or pain or worry…you can be yourself, who you truly are. No pretenses. No false hopes or attempting to do good and failing. You can do whatever you want to whoever you want. I must tell you, darling, it's quite a wonderful feeling."_

"_You're despicable," Julie snarled. "You try to justify what you do by saying that it makes you _feel good?"

"_Oh, no," the king of the Knights chuckled. "I don't have to justify what I do. It's great. And I know you'd enjoy it, Juliet. That pain you felt when Daddy died, or when Dean sent you away to 'keep you safe'…it doesn't hurt anymore, love."_

_Julie would never admit it, but she would love a life where she felt no pain. But she would never, _ever _become a demon._

"_You know who else would make an excellent demon?" Beelzebub smirked. "I'll let you guess. He's another one of those people who tries so hard to be good, always trying to save people and be the hero. But he always seems to fail, doesn't he? He's got so much guilt and so much grief and so much pain that he carries with him all the time. And he's got an evil in him, too, and it's just going to grow. I'd be doing your Dean a kindness if I took away all his pain and let him be who he truly is."_

"_No," Julie growled. "He'd never become one of you. He's far too good for you to ever do that to him."_

_Beelzebub laughed. "Juliet, darling, how blind are you? The man's already dangerously dark, with no help from us. And a few years back, he went to hell, too, or hasn't he told you? And he gave in after just thirty years, and that wasn't even to a true master like Lucifer or Asmodeus or me, of course. Sweetheart, I know it hurts, but you have to understand...that man you love…he's halfway to becoming a demon already. And believe me, he'd be happier as one."_

"_No," Julie whispered. "No, he would never…he would never do that…"_

_All of the sudden, the demons were cutting into her again, and her blood was flowing, and she was screaming, and she was staring at Dean's handsome face, but then his green eyes flashed black-_

"Jules, honey!"

Julie's eyes flew wide open and she found herself staring up at Dean. For a moment, she could swear his eyes really were black, but then he moved closer to her, concerned, and she saw his eyes, their familiar green, in the moonlight.

"Julie, what's wrong?" Dean asked gently, and she realized that her face was wet with tears and she was hopelessly tangled in the bed sheets from thrashing around.

"I just…" She sat up shakily, trying to wipe away the tears.

Dean softened. "C'mere," he sighed, getting out of bed and half-guiding, half-carrying her out of bed. He walked her over to the sink and she washed her face and splashed some water on her neck. She watched the water run over her hands, cool and clear, until she was finally calm again.

Julie turned around and found Dean studying her. "How long?" he sighed.

"What?"

"How long have you been having the nightmares?" he said carefully.

"Dean, I…" Julie stopped. There was no point in lying to him. "Since…since I got back."

Dean sighed again. "I figured."

"How did you know?" she asked slowly.

"Jules, I went to hell too," he said, looking about a hundred years old. "I remember what it was like when I first got back. What it's still like, every once in a while."

Julie decided not to tell Dean that this nightmare hadn't been from hell, but instead a memory from only a few days ago. "How…how do you deal with them?" she asked him softly.

"Whiskey," Dean muttered. "Working a case. Not sleeping." He looked up and met her eyes. "You."

Julie stepped into Dean's waiting embrace and rested her head on his chest. "I'm so-" she started to apologize.

"If you even try to apologize for having nightmares about the ten years of hell you went through to save me, I _will _lose it," he warned her.

They were both silent for a moment. "I'm sorry," she said firmly, and he sighed.

"Yeah, me too," he muttered after a couple of seconds.

The two of them slipped back into bed, but neither felt much like sleeping. "Talk to me," Julie said.

"About what?" Dean asked, rubbing his thumb across her shoulder.

"Anything," she said. "Something happy, or funny. No more nightmares of hell stuff."

"Okay," Dean shrugged. "I did a case here, once."

"Really?" Julie asked, intrigued.

"Yeah. It was a while ago, and some ghost was haunting that abandoned factory we passed on the way in."

Julie settled in against Dean's chest, absently tracing her fingers along his arm as he spoke. "Well, it technically wasn't abandoned yet. People were still working there, but conditions were so shitty they probably shouldn't have been. Some fifteen-year-old kid got killed in an accident working there, when he technically shouldn't have been allowed to work there at all, and he started haunting the place. Killed a couple of his bosses before I rolled into town and saved the day."

"Look at you," Julie smirked. "Did they shut the place down then, after all those deaths?"

Dean snorted. "No, that place stayed open for six more years before someone finally pointed out all the health codes and laws they were breaking and they got shut down."

"Six years?" she repeated. "But that place looks like it's been out of commission for years!"

"Yeah, it has. That must have been…wow. Summer of '04, I think."

"You're kidding," Julie said. "So you were…what? Twenty-four?"

"Twenty-five, actually," he replied.

"And Sam must have been twenty-one then," she realized. "Bet you gave him quite the night when he finally could legally drink."

"Once it's legal, it takes all the fun out of it," Dean smirked. "And actually… Sammy was at Stanford then. It was just me."

"Oh. Right." Julie squeezed his hand apologetically, wanting to kick herself for bringing up that touchy subject. Even now, fourteen years after the fact, Sam abandoning his older brother for a different life still hurt. And they had been having fun, too…

"Wonder what you were like at twenty-five," Julie smirked, changing the subject. "What do you think? Would I still have liked you?"

"Well, for one thing, you would have been seventeen," Dean pointed out. "You would have still been in high school." He pinched her cheek teasingly. "Damn. You're practically a baby."

"That's not what you were saying a few nights ago," she smirked, and that shut him up. "Anyway, ignoring the age gap. Would I have still fallen for you at twenty-five?"

"No," Dean said without hesitating. "Believe me, you would have hated me. I was a screwed up borderline alcoholic-"

"God knows how I can't stand _them_-"

"And I was a pig if I do say so myself," he finished. "I wouldn't have fallen for you, because back then…I'm not even sure I knew how to love. Believe me, Jules, I was very much the different girl every night type of guy. You would have hated me."

"But if we had met a few years later, when I went through my rebellious, slutty phase, we would have been great," Julie smirked, trying not to imagine a world where she had fallen for Dean and slept with him and he had been gone in the morning instead of by her side, looking at her with love in his eyes.

"Still wouldn't have fallen in love," Dean pointed out. "But that would have been some damn good sex."

"Can't argue with that." Julie stopped to think for a moment. "I wonder what it would have been like if we had met a lot earlier."

"I think…you would have saved me from a lot of messes," Dean admitted. "You probably still would have died though, going off my track record."

And suddenly it wasn't fun anymore. Julie sighed and stroked the side of Dean's face. "I wouldn't have cared," she whispered. "I would still love you."

"I love you too, kiddo," he smirked, and she shot him a dangerous look.

"Got it. No more kiddo. I thought we were still going off the age gap."

"Well then, I think it's a bit past your bedtime, Gramps."

Dean chuckled and kissed Julie. She kissed him back, a lot more passionately than he was expecting. She held his face in her hands even after she pulled away, as if she was afraid to let him go.

"I love you," she murmured.

Dean pulled her closer to him with one arm, tucking the covers in around her with the other. He stroked her blond curls until Julie slowly relaxed and drifted off into a nightmare-free sleep.

So, maybe she didn't need whiskey, or to always be working a case, or to just refuse to sleep. Julie would be okay. She had him.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Dean and Julie showered and got dressed before joining Sam in his room. They entered the room just as he hung up the phone, smiling slightly.<p>

"Who was that?" Dean asked as he grabbed a bagel out of the bag Sam had bought and ate half the thing in one bite.

Sam rolled his eyes at his brother's horrific table manners. "Um…that was Leah. The girl we helped."

"Why was she calling?" Dean asked with him mouth full. "Everything okay back there? You did gank the ghost, right?"

"I—yeah," Sam sighed. "I think she was calling for more…personal reasons."

Dean's eyebrows shot up. Then he chuckled. "Look at Sammy, back in the game! Jules, I owe you ten bucks."

"Already took it," she said coolly, taking a bagel and settling on the end of Sam's bed. "What did Leah want?"

"To make sure we were all alright," Sam shrugged. "I spared her the gory details and just said you two were with me and you were okay."

"So does she know about hunting now, then?" Dean guessed.

"Yeah, and she was pretty chill about it. She didn't seem to have any plans after college, and it's her senior year, so…I think we may have accidentally created another hunter." Sam smirked almost proudly.

"You know, maybe she could hunt with us for a while, if she does become a hunter," Julie said. "Bet you two would have loads of fun."

"Ooh, and could we go on double dates and everything?" Dean said in mock-excitement. They both shot him looks, and he grinned, always able to amuse himself, if no one else. "Sorry. No, she seemed pretty cool. Hot, too. Nice job, Sammy. She could come by anytime she wanted."

"Thanks, guys, but…" Sam sighed. "Right now, we should focus on the Knights. I'm not really interested in bringing her into our lives if it's just going to get her killed. She stays out, she stays safe. Maybe, if we survive all this…maybe then we could visit her again or something. But until then…"

"I get it," Dean said. "I know what it's like, wanting to protect someone you love from all this."

For a moment, there was a beat of silence. "Well, boys, we have a nest of vamps to kill, unless anyone has any objections," Julie said finally, to break the tense silence.

Neither of them did, so the three of them loaded into the Impala. They drove through town, checking out any abandoned buildings or barns where vampires might be likely to settle down. After they had killed a hunter here about thirteen years ago, a couple of his friends had come seeking vengeance, and when they realized the vampires were gone, they burned their old nest. So, if the vampires were even here, they could be anywhere.

It was getting close to noon, and all three of them were miserable and frustrated, when Dean suddenly had a flash of inspiration.

"The factory!" he cried suddenly, slamming on the brakes as they passed it for the third time that morning.

Sam groaned, having smacked his head on the roof of the car. "What about it?"

"It's abandoned, isn't it? We haven't checked there, though."

And so the three hunters parked a safe distance away from the deserted factory and crept up to the back door. Dean made quick work of the cheap padlock on the door, and they crept silently through the dark halls of the factory until they came to a room where the workers had once assembled goods on the conveyor belts. The conveyor belts were still there in the room, but there were still and rusty. There were some other, newer things in the room as well.

Stretched between a few conveyor belts were four or five hammocks. Sleeping bodies were sprawled inside them, and Dean couldn't make out much more than a couple limbs dangling out of the hammocks. Over in the corner of the room, though, there was another body, one that made his stomach lurch. The man was obviously dead, his head half-disconnected from his body. His skin was even paler than a corpse's, and there was so little blood for such a gruesome wound he must have been sucked dry.

"That's one of the missing men," Sam whispered.

"Great," Dean hissed back. "Well, we found the nest. But where are the rest of them? Aren't there supposed to be like-?"

"Get down!" Julie suddenly hissed before shoving both brothers into a maintenance closet. The three of them squeezed inside just as footsteps rounded the corner.

"…Bit risky to come back to a town we've already hit, Morgan," a man's low, gruff voice grumbled.

"It's been thirteen years, Horace," a woman's voice snapped, surprisingly low and cold for a woman. "And honestly, I don't quite care if some idiot hunters find us and try to take us out. I want revenge for Millie and Logan."

"Look, I'm sorry your brother and his mate got caught, Morgan, but they were being _stupid_," a third voice snapped. He sounded younger than the other too, not much older than a teenager. "You can't kill someone and then leave a witness. It just makes it that much easier to get caught. You'd think we've been around a couple weeks and not centuries."

"You're not even two-hundred, Joe," the woman, Morgan snapped. "So don't talk down about my brother or Millie."

Both men sighed. Julie was so tense she thought she might snap. They had stopped walking and were standing maybe three feet away. If it weren't for the awful stench of this place, they would have detected three beating hearts, three bodies full of blood already.

"But he's got a point," the older man sighed. "That last hunter we killed here…he had a partner, remember? That guy got out, and we learned long ago survivors tend to come back to bite you in the ass."

"He's come up in the system a couple times since then," the young man added. "Carters, Jasper Carters, I think it was." It took everything in Julie not to cry out as she realized what they were talking about. If she so much as gasped, though, they'd be dead. "He's been killing quite a few of our kind the past decade or so."

"Oh, don't tell me you're scared," Morgan smirked. "Joey, we've had this system for a couple centuries, and we've survived long after they're all dead. One vengeful brother is not going to be enough to wipe _us _out."

The other male vampire, Horace, chuckled, and their voices and footsteps faded away. "Come on," Sam whispered, forcing Dean and Julie out of the closet. The two brother took off, half-dragging Julie back to the car, since she seemed to be in some state of shock. But as they finally reached the Impala and safety, Julie suddenly threw them off and turned to go back.

"Julie, what the hell are you doing?" Sam cried, grabbing her arm. "We're not ready to take on that many vamps, especially ones who know how to survive like those do. They've been around _centuries_, Julie. We can't just march in there and kill them right now. They'll eat us alive."

"You think I _care_?" Julie snarled, and both brothers were surprised by the intensity and anger in her voice. "Did you hear them?!"

"Yeah, they mentioned Jasper," Dean shrugged. "So what? They didn't know about you."

"No," Julie said in an oddly choked voice, and she suddenly looked near tears. "Didn't you _hear _them? That hunter they killed thirteen years ago had a partner who survived, and that was Jasper. '_A vengeful brother'_?" she cried, and Sam's stomach dropped out of him as he finally realized what she meant, and what those vampires had been admitting to without even realizing.

"Oh, Julie…" he said weakly, wishing he could help her, but knowing he couldn't.

Julie stared at them with tears in her eyes and said slowly, "Those are the vampires that murdered my father."


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter Twenty-Six**

**Thirteen Years Earlier…**

"Juliet?"

Juliet Carters looked up, excited, as the front door of Jasper's house opened. She and her cousin, Taylor, had been staying there alone for about a week until their dads returned from a hunt. And that must mean…

"Dad!" she yelled, practically running into the other room. And there he was in the doorway, tall and lean, wearing faded jeans and a battered hunting jacket. Thomas Carters grinned when he saw her and opened his arms.

Juliet hugged her father tightly. She remembered that in her younger days, whenever her father returned from a hunt, she would leap into his arms, squealing. She was a bit old for that now. Fifteen years old, and he _still _wouldn't let her hunt! He had taught her how to fire all sorts of guns, all the tricks to protect yourself from all different kinds of monsters, and she was proving to be an excellent fighter herself, tough and smart and quick. But Thomas did not want his daughter getting any more involved in the life he led than she had to.

Thomas pulled away from his beloved daughter and tousled her long blond hair. She wore it down nearly to her elbows in long golden curls. She had a pretty, fresh face, big blue eyes, and she had already developed the body of a young woman. One of his biggest fears while he was away, besides the fact that a monster could come and try to hurt her, is that a young man would try to do the same to his beautiful daughter.

Juliet smiled up at her father. Despite all he'd been through in his thirty-five years, Thomas still looked relatively young and handsome. He and his older brother both did. They looked similar, with handsome, square-jawed faces, close-cropped, dirty blond hair, the same slight wrinkles in-between their eyebrows from furrowing their brows, but also the same laugh lines around their eyes. "How'd it go, Dad?" she asked. "I'm assuming you won and all…"

"Oh, hell yeah, we did!" another voice chuckled, and her uncle, Jasper stepped into the house behind Thomas. His had more stubble than Jasper, and there were deeper lines in his face, but he too was handsome in a rugged sort of way. He tried to tousle Juliet's curls as well, but she dodged away and shot him a look, causing him to grin.

"I would appreciate it if you didn't swear in front of my daughter," Thomas sighed.

"I don't give a damn about it, Dad," Juliet said sweetly with an innocent smile up at them.

Jasper laughed and gave the girl a one-armed hug. "Oh, I missed you, Juliet. Now, where is _my _daughter?"

Juliet looked down, slightly ashamed. "She…she went out again. With that Derek guy. I tried to tell her not to, but she wouldn't listen to me."

"Of course she wouldn't," Jasper sighed, his good mood gone. "Great. Tommy, you just be glad you've got a good girl there."

He stomped off to go hunt down his wild, rebellious daughter. Thomas hugged his daughter again. "I do, don't I?"

Juliet grinned. Then father and daughter put away all of the weapons they had brought on the hunt and settled down for a meal and to catch up. Juliet told her father all about school that week, how she had aced three more tests, and how two more boys had asked her to the homecoming dance in a couple of weeks.

"Are they nice boys?" Thomas asked in-between bits of her sandwich.

"Luke, the junior, he's really sweet," she shrugged. "Paul…well, I probably won't say yes to him. He's a senior, and a jock-type, and I think he's just taking me to try to get laid at the end of the night."

Thomas clenched his fists. It was difficult for him to even hear his sweet young daughter talking like that. "Well, if you do go with him, remind me to whoop his ass when he comes to pick you up. Oh, and one more thing—you're not going with him!"

"Calm down, Dad," she sighed. "I wasn't planning on it. I'm smarter than that."

"I know you are," he replied fondly. Then Juliet asked Thomas all about the hunt, and how they had managed to kill the djinn.

"It was tough," Thomas admitted. "He almost got me under at one point, but Jasper stepped in and saved me. That's the job of big brother's right? Always saving you?"

"And fathers," Juliet added, hugging her him tightly. "Remember last year, when you actually let me go on a hunt for a once, and that ghost tried to drown me? You shot it with rock salt and saved me."

"I couldn't let anything hurt my sweet girl," he sighed, stroking her hair. Then he frowned. "Listen, Juliet…I'm really sorry about this, sweetheart, I truly am. But…Jasper and I already found another case. It's a vampire nest a few hours from here, and they've been pretty active lately. We figured we'd go take them out and be back in time for your homecoming dance, easy."

Juliet frowned. "How long will you be gone?"

"A week tops. Probably not even that long. All we've got to do is find them and do a little beheading and we are out of there."

"And when are you leaving?"

Thomas sighed. "Tomorrow. I'm sorry, sweetie…"

"Don't be!" Juliet insisted. "I have the coolest dad in the world! He runs off to kill vampires and save people's lives, but he'll still be back in time to send me to the homecoming dance. If only he would just take me with him…" she added hopefully.

"Not on this one, Juliet," her father said. "This'll be a tough hunt, and I'm not letting you get hurt, no matter what."

Juliet sighed, but she didn't pout for very long. She only had her father back for a day, anyway. After a couple hours, Jasper returned with Taylor and they yelled at each other for a good ten minutes before calming down. Then the family settled down to talk and watch TV for a few hours.

The next morning Juliet helped Thomas and Jasper get ready for their hunt, while Taylor pouted in a corner, watching. The two brothers loaded up their truck, talking in their usual easy, teasing banter. Jasper hugged both girls goodbye before getting into the driver's seat, because he always insisted on driving everywhere.

Thomas hugged his daughter tightly for a very long time. For some reason, this goodbye was feeling especially hard. Maybe it was because their time together had been so very short. He wished he could stay with his darling daughter forever, but he had a job to do.

"I love you, Juliet," he said quietly, and she smiled, looking near tears for some reason.

Juliet was feeling odd about this goodbye as well. It felt strangely…final. She pushed that dark thought aside and whispered, "I love you too, Dad."

He kissed the top of her head and got into the truck. And the two brothers drove away, waving at their daughter as they disappeared into the distance.

That was the last time Juliet ever saw her father again.

* * *

><p><strong>Thirteen Years Later…<strong>

"I'm going back in there, and I'm killing those bastards," Julie snarled, pulling her arm free of Sam's grip and stepping towards the abandoned factory.

"Jules, no!" Dean snapped, stepping in front of her. "Look, I know how hard it is to lose a father, believe me. And I remember how much I wanted revenge. But we have no idea how many vamps are in there and what we're up against."

"I don't care!" Julie snapped. "Dean, he was my father! I loved him more than anything, and they murdered him, and you honestly believe I'm going to let them keep breathing for another _minute_ now that I've found them?"

"Julie, just listen to us," Sam said as gently as he could. "I remember when I was in your shoes, ten years ago. We found the yellow-eyed demon that killed my mom and Jessica, and I wanted to charge into a burning house and try to kill it. I knew it was suicide, but I didn't care, because I _needed _revenge. And if Dean hadn't been there to stop me, I would have killed myself trying to get revenge. Is that really what you want?"

"He was the best man in the world, and he was the only parent I had left, and they killed him," she said softly, but now she seemed closer to tears than charging in there to go down fighting.

Dean could swear he could hear his heart breaking seeing Julie like this. She never talked about her dad, or her mom either, but she had been two when Katrina Carters had died, so she didn't really remember her well. Her father, on the other hand, had raised her until she was fifteen, and the thought of his death was so painful she never talked about it.

The death of John Winchester had messed Dean up a lot, but for different reasons. He had loved his father, despite the hell of a life he had put him through. But it wasn't just the loss of his father that had screwed Dean up. He had been twenty-six, an adult who had been living and hunting without John for a year, and he knew he didn't need his father anymore. It was the knowledge that John had sold his soul to save Dean and had essentially died and gone to hell to bring him back from the dead. And Dean could not cope with that grief and guilt.

But this was different. Thomas's death hadn't been for Julie, but he had been such a good, kind, loving father, unlike John in many ways, that his death had destroyed her. And now that she had the chance to get revenge, Dean could understand why she would throw all caution to the wind and go in guns blazing.

"Julie, sweetheart, I promise we will get your revenge, okay?" Dean said carefully, looking her in the eye. "But we can't just go charging in there! We've got to think, we've got to plan-"

"What planning?" Julie snapped at him. "We've got weapons, we've got training, we have the advantage during the day. What else could you possibly want, Dean?"

Dean had almost never seen her lose her cool like this. The last time she'd snapped at him like this was when they were fighting about her and Sam and her safety. He had lost her then, and he was not willing to lose her again. So he took a deep breath to keep from snapping back and said carefully, "I want you to calm down. I'm not letting you go in there like this—you'll get yourself killed!"

"So what? I let them walk free?!"

"No," Sam said as calmly as he could. "You just need to get some perspective. If it were any other hunt, you wouldn't go in there and fight a bunch of vamps without a clear head."

"He's right, you know," a woman's cool voice said, and the three hunters whipped around, all arguments forgotten. Because now it didn't matter whether or not Julie was too upset to fight.

The vampires had brought the fight to them.

Sam and Julie drew their machetes, and Dean resisted the urge to pull out the weapon that he was keeping in his jacket. That was a last resort, if nothing else could possibly work, but as eight vampires slowly formed a circle around him and the two people he loved most, Dean had to fight the urge to whip out the First Blade and massacre these vampires.

"Did you really think we couldn't smell you?" the female vampire who had spoken before smirked. Dean recognized her voice as the one who had been talking inside the factory, the one called Morgan. "Thought you were going to sneak around in a building full of vampires and not get caught, little hunters?"

Dean clenched his fists, trying to ignore the way the Mark of Cain was burning, egging him on, urging him to pull out the First Blade. But he knew from experience the more he used it the faster he deteriorated into something that…well, wasn't him.

"You know what? I'm glad you found us," Julie said coldly. "Makes it that much easier to kill you."

"She's cocky, this one," a tall, burly vampire with a ponytail chuckled. He crossed his muscular arms, and they bulged. "What makes you think you can kill us, sweetheart? There's three of you and eight of us. And you're just hunters. You can't win."

"You have no idea who you're up against," Julie snapped.

"Well, obviously the Winchester's," Morgan sighed dramatically, pushing her long, dark hair out of her face to study them with cold, dark eyes. Sam and Dean blinked, surprised that she knew them. "What?" the vampire smirked. "Are you really surprised that we know you? Every monster who's not practically a newborn knows who you boys are. And to think we'll be the ones who get the honor of killing you…"

"Yeah, good luck with that," Sam muttered. "A lot of monsters have tried and failed. What makes you think you're any better than them?"

Morgan glanced around at the seven other vampires with her. "Most of us have been alive for over two-hundred years. You boys are tough and all, but you're babies compared to us. We know how to _survive_, Winchester."

"You know, you wouldn't have to survive like this if you didn't kill," Sam snapped.

"We're vampires!" a young male vampire laughed, and Dean recognized his voice as well as the one belonging to the vampire they had called Joey. "We have to kill to survive!"

"We've met vampires who survive without killing humans, so don't you pretend you don't have a choice," Sam shot back.

"No, he's right," a petite blond vampire laughed. She would seem pretty and innocent if not for the darkness in her eyes and the dried blood around her mouth. "I have to admit…there's something so _fun _about the thrill of the hunt, watching the life fade from a human's eyes, tasting that fresh blood…" She chuckled darkly, and Dean suppressed a shudder at this evil creature before him. He hated vampires, but there was a small part of him that could identify with them after his brief spell as a vampire himself. He remembered those sickening urges to drink and kill, and he could understand why they would just give in to their nature and embrace it.

Sometimes it got hard to fight who, or rather _what_ you were.

The other vampires were chuckling and nodding at what the blond vampire had said. "I have to admit, I don't know who you are," Morgan said, studying Julie.

Dean moved to stand protectively in front of Julie as he often did instinctively, but she shoved past him, eyes fiery with anger. "You want to know who I am? I'm the daughter of Thomas Carters, a good man who you and your nest here murdered thirteen years ago."

Morgan blinked and then laughed. "Oh, that's right! I remember him. He and his brother came in, cocky and tough and all talk, it turns out. Your daddy? He died pitifully. We tore him up pretty bad, and his big brother dragged him out of there so he could bleed out in his arms. I'm sure it was sweet and all. All I really remember was that he was tasty, and I'd bet you are too, my dear."

Julie's fists were shaking with rage. "He was the best man in the world, and you murdered him, and I swear to god, I'll kill you all," she growled.

The vampires chuckled. "I'd like to see you try," a burly vampire laughed, and then they all leapt forward as if commanded.

Julie tried to behead Morgan, but the vampire was fast on her feet. She dodged Julie's swipe and struck her across the face. Julie stumbled backwards straight into a waiting vampire who tried to wrestle her to the ground. Meanwhile, Sam beheaded one vampire before three vampires leapt on him, disarming him, and they descended on Dean's brother.

Dean watched in horror as his girlfriend and brother fell at the hands of the vampires who would kill them without hesitation. And he knew then he had no choice. If he had to choose between losing a bit of his humanity and watching either of them die, he knew what he would pick.

Morgan's head whipped up and she started to step towards the shorter Winchester. But she froze as the man pulled a strange bone knife out of his jacket. She didn't know what it was, but somehow she could sense its power. There was so much strength and power and evil in that weapon, and as she watched, the man's expression changed to something dark and malicious.

For the first time in over a century, Morgan felt fear of a human. She turned to run, but this man was too fast and strong. She barely got three feet away before he caught up to her and with one quick sweep, the vampire was beheaded.

One of the male vampires roared in anger and leapt at Dean. The hunter dodged the vampire's first strike and then slugged him hard in the face. The undead monster, which should have been stronger than any human, stumbled back. Two more scrambled forward to take his place, and Dean made quick work of them.

The remaining four vampires all went at Dean at the same time, leaving Julie and Sam forgotten on the ground. They watched in awe and horror as Dean beheaded the blond vampire in a quick swipe and then easily beheaded the burliest vampire. The remaining two vampires realized they were doomed and tried to run, but Dean caught the larger, burlier one and slammed the hilt of the Blade into his spine, breaking something. The monster screamed in pain and fell, and Dean beheaded the vampire calmly before approaching the final vampire.

The young vampire, Joey, backed away from him, trembling. "Wait, please," he begged. "I didn't want to hurt you…I was never going to…I was just obeying Morgan! Please, you have to believe me!"

Even with all of her hatred of these monsters who had murdered her father, Julie felt a twinge of sympathy for this pathetic monster. "I'm sorry, please!" Joey wailed. "Please, don't-"

His begs were cut off abruptly, along with his head.

For a moment, Dean stood with his back to Sam and Julie. They slowly got to their feet, uncertain what to do, as he stood there, breathing heavily, the bloody First Blade still gripped tightly in his hand. Julie tried not to look at the corpses of eight vampires lying at Dean's feet. As much as she had wanted them dead, this didn't feel like much of a victory. Because that hadn't seemed much like Dean killing them. The cold, unfeeling way he had obliterated these monsters…that had seemed almost monstrous itself.

Julie risked a glance over at Sam and saw the same fear and concern mirrored on his face. So this really was a problem, and she wasn't just imagining it.

Dean turned slowly, and she expected the same scared, confused Dean she had seen the last time he had killed with the Blade. But instead, the man she loved looked remarkably calm and even a little smug. He knelt and wiped the First Blade clean on Joey's jacket before tucking it back into his jacket.

And then he smirked at Julie. "Told you you'd get your revenge, didn't I?"

Julie swallowed, feeling oddly hollow inside. She had thought revenge would make her happy, or at least give her some peace, but she was somehow even more upset now than she had been when those evil vampires had still been alive.

* * *

><p>The Impala pulled up in front of the gates of the Cedar Hill Graveyard in Colorado. Three hunters got out of the car, two men and a women. But instead of the usual salt and gasoline they brought into cemeteries for salt-and-burnings, they carried with them only two bouquets of flowers. White lilies and lavender, the flowers that had made up the bouquet at the wedding of Katrina Mayor and Thomas Carters. Thomas had told Julie that one time, when she was eight, as they went through old photo albums, and she had somehow remembered it for twenty years.<p>

Sam, Dean, and Julie walked through the graveyard in silence until they found the two tombstones, side-by-side. One was white marble and had Katrina Mayor-Carters engraved on it in flowery script. It was beautiful, and expensive, and Helen Mayor, Julie's grandmother, had it made when Katrina died. It said all sorts of things about her being a perfect wife and mother and daughter and upstanding citizen and a woman of good upbringing. Julie absolutely despised the tombstone. She had visited it twice in her life, once with her father, and once after he died, cold and grieving and alone. She and Jasper had made sure that a specific tombstone was put next to it, though, because even in death, they would want to be together.

Thomas Carters' tombstone was just a grey tombstone. It said Thomas Carters and the years he had lived and it stated simply at the bottom: "A good man."

Some people might find that rude or cold or bland. But it wasn't, it was just true. There was nothing more that needed to be said. Thomas Carters had been a good man, the best, and that was all that should have to be said about anyone at the end of their life, if they lived it right. It could say "loving husband, father, brother, and uncle," or "he died too early," or "he was too damn good to die." All of those things were true, but Thomas honestly would just want to be remembered as good.

Julie knelt in front of her parents' tombstones and gently placed the bouquets in front of them. She sat in silence for a while, the chilly wind blowing her hair in her face, but she didn't care. She had wanted to come here for some closure after everything that had happened with the vampires who had killed Thomas, but now she didn't know what to do or say.

She just sat there, feeling empty and sad and alone. Julie was just beginning to regret coming here, when she felt someone kneeling down next to her and turned to see Sam kneeling on her right side. Dean knelt down on her left side and the three of them sat in silence in front of the tombstones were Julie's parents' remains lay. They sat there until they grew numb, and then Julie buried her face in Dean's jacket and pulled Sam into their embrace. For a long time, the three of them held each other, and then without another word, the three hunters got up and walked back to the car.

* * *

><p>Dean toweled off his wet hair and walked into his bedroom. Julie was curled up on the bed with a thick novel in front of her, but her eyes weren't moving across the page. He sighed and stopped on his mission to find a shirt to ask her, "Do you feel any better now?" Now that she had gotten revenge for her father's death and visited his grave. Now that she should theoretically have closure.<p>

"No," Julie said flatly. They'd only been back at the bunker from that traumatic hunt for a few hours, and yet already Dean had cleaned the room, cleaned out his guns and sharpened all his knives, cooked and eaten a huge meal, and showered. She knew he was trying to keep himself busy so he wouldn't have to think about what he'd done, but she honestly needed him right now. It was selfish, but she wanted him to stop for just a moment and actually talk to her.

Dean somehow seemed to sense how she was feeling, and he sat down on the bed next to her, wearing only a battered old pair of jeans. Oh well. He didn't need a shirt to be there for the woman he loved, who was hurting a lot right now.

"I'm sorry," Dean said softly, putting an arm around Julie and pulling her a bit closer to him.

Julie sighed and tossed her novel on the floor. "It's not your fault," she muttered.

"You're right," Dean admitted. "Even _I _can't find a way to blame myself for what happened to your dad. But it shouldn't have happened. Your mother shouldn't have died either. No one should have to go through that."

"You did," Julie pointed out.

"Which is how I know how much it hurts." Dean hesitated. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No. I don't know." She bit her lip. "It might help."

"Tell me about them," he said gently.

And so Julie did. She told Dean about her mother, who she could barely remember, but had been a sweet, gentle woman. Mostly, she talked about her beloved father, and how tough and funny he could be, but also how gentle and loving and caring. She recounted stories of him teaching her how to defend herself, about how defensive he got of her around boys, of his wonderful relationship with Jasper and how destroyed the elder brother had been when he lost his little brother.

"Sounds a bit like me and Sammy," Dean admitted.

"Maybe I just like to surround myself with dysfunctional brothers who hunt supernatural creatures and always seem to be getting killed." Julie had meant to say it as a joke, but it came out harshly honest.

"You would've liked him," she said after a long moment. "And he would have liked you. After he got past the whole wanting to kill you for sleeping with his daughter bit."

Dean laughed lightly. She hadn't heard him laugh since before they had found the vampires' nest, and it was such a rare, wonderful sound…

"I wish he could have met you," Julie whispered, leaning into Dean's bare chest.

"Me too, Jules," he sighed, stroking her blond curls. It was a comforting gesture for both of them, one that soothed them no matter the circumstances.

Julie suddenly realized how selfish she was being. Here was Dean, struggling with the Mark of Cain and the First Blade and the new need to kill slowly overtaking him, and yet she was just rambling on about her dead father. Thomas had been dead thirteen years—Dean was struggling _now_.

"Forget about that, though," she said, sitting up straight to look at Dean. "Let's talk about you."

Dean glanced down. "Or we could not," he muttered.

"Look, I'm not complaining about those vampires dying, or about you saving Sam and I, but…Dean, the way you killed them…it just didn't seem-"

"Human?" Dean smirked bitterly. "Yeah, well, you had better get used to that, Julie. I'm not going to be human for much longer. That Blade and the Mark are going to take over me and turn me into a killing machine, and we had better be able to kill all of the Knights before then, because when I go full monster, you or Sam or Cas is going to have to put me down."

"Dean!" Julie snapped, shocked and horrified. "Don't talk like that! It doesn't have to be like that-"

"Yeah, it does," he said darkly, getting up. "Look, Jules…I can feel this…this _evil _inside of me. And it's just going to get stronger. This happened to me before, but it's happening faster now. I guess it's because I've already used the Blade before and it's picking up where it started or something, but it's going to take me over, and I don't want to live like that. You'd be doing me a kindness if you just ended me."

"Stop it!" Julie snapped, getting up as well. "That's not going to happen. You can fight it, and we'll help you, and once all the Knights are dead, you can give it up again. You did it before with no help but Crowley, and you can do it with all of us there for you."

Dean nodded, but Julie got the feeling he was only doing that to make her feel better. He pulled on a t-shirt and walked out of the bedroom to go get more food or something, leaving Julie alone. She stood there alone in the room for a long moment, trying and failing not to imagine Dean going dark and them having to "put him down."

She had hoped that they would have months before they really had to worry about this. But it was clear that things were moving a lot faster now, and if they didn't hurry, they'd lose Dean before he even managed to kill all the Knights, and it would all have been for nothing.

* * *

><p>Crowley sighed and rubbed his eyes tiredly. Demons didn't need sleep, but they sure got exhausted. He couldn't remember the last time he had just gotten to sit down at a bar and relax, and he was grateful for the chance now.<p>

He ordered several shots of the darkest, strongest thing the bartender could find. As he sat, waiting, he found his mind wandering to Dean Winchester and what he would be doing right now. That man had taken up the Blade again to get revenge for his precious girlfriend and to protect the people he cared about most. A noble cause, but a foolish action. And while Crowley had been trying to get Dean to take up the First Blade again, there was a very small part of him that felt bad for the poor man.

He just wanted to get to live happily ever after with that girl and his brother. And after all that he had done, was that too much to ask?

Apparently so, because everyone, including Crowley, still had many plans for the eldest Winchester.

The bartender returned with four shots of extremely strong stuff that he didn't even bother giving a name to. "And what would you like, sir?" the bartender asked someone behind Crowley.

"Just to talk to my friend here," the man said in a horribly familiar, pleasant voice.

Crowley stiffened and tried not to show fear as the handsome young man sat down on the stool next to him. "How have you been, Crowley?" Beelzebub took one of Crowley's shots and whistled after downing it. "Damn. Those are _strong. _So not too well, huh?"

"What do you want?" Crowley growled, glaring at the bar. The Knight was preventing him from teleporting out, and he knew he was about to die, but he at least wanted it to be quick.

"Just to talk," the Beelzebub said calmly. "I've got some questions for you about our dear Mr. Winchester. I know you two have a reasonably close personal relationship, and I know you have some influence on him. Obviously, you got him to start using the First Blade again, with a little help from me."

"About that," Crowley said. "Why would you want the only man capable of killing you wielding the only weapon that can kill you?"

"For the same reason you do," the Knight shrugged. "The end result. And I _am_ aware that he can kill me now. So I'll be steering clear of him, sending however many monsters and demons and angels it takes for him to finally lose himself, or until one of them kills him. And I assume that's what you want, too…"

Crowley nodded hastily, afraid to disagree with this dangerous demon. "But what do you need me for?"

"Well, Crowley, so far things are going according to plan, although I do wish I could have sacrificed Apollyon or Adramalech instead of Asmodeus. I was rather fond of my brother. I mean, you should have seen him torture that poor girlfriend of Dean's—he was a true master, and always good for a game of poker. But sometimes you have to make sacrifices for the greater evil."

"Sure," Crowley shrugged. "But you've got him using the Blade again, and I'm not sure why you want me."

"I'm here to make you a deal, Crowley," Beelzebub said with a charming smile. "As I'm sure you know, I'm king of hell. But once Dean Winchester is defeated and our plans can really come to culmination, I will no longer be wanting hell. I'll be turning earth into the new and improved hell, but I will need a second-in-command to run downstairs for me. So what do you say, Crowley? You be a little spy for me, let me know how our Dean is doing and how I can speed up the process, and once it's complete, you get your old throne back?"

Crowley hesitated slightly. "Your other option would be me killing you now," the king of the Knights of Hell added darkly.

"We have a deal!" Crowley said quickly, and the former king of hell and the current one shook hands.

"Another round, sir!" Beelzebub called as Crowley quickly downed the rest of the shots, trying not to think about what he was doing. The bartender brought out another round of shots and Beelzebub proposed a toast.

"To the fall of Dean Winchester!" he chuckled, and the two demons drank to that.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter Twenty-Seven**

_Hooks dug into Julie's flesh, one in her thigh and another in her shoulder, and she screamed. They pulled her in two opposite directions and she wailed as skin and muscles tore._

"_Please," she sobbed. "Please stop."_

_The hooks released her and she was falling. She hit something hard, and the impact broke several bones in her body. She was in so much agony that she knew she should be dead, but she couldn't die, and it wouldn't end._

_Asmodeus's true form appeared before her, horrifying and disgusting. He laughed cruelly, and she felt something pierce the skin just below her ribcage and slowly cut downwards. She was far too weak to scream, so she made pitiful, dying animal noises._

_Her stomach was sliced open, and he began to fish around inside. Julie found the voice to scream again, tears pouring down her bloody, bruised, ravaged face, but he wouldn't stop. The demon was dissecting her, and he wouldn't stop, and she couldn't die, and it would never end…_

_Suddenly, her leg was on fire, and Julie screamed until her voice broke, the smell of her burning flesh filling her nostrils, the agony too much for her to bear, and she was wailing, "Please, please let it stop, please let me die, _please…"

Julie shot upright in bed, her hands flying to her stomach. She ran her hands over the smooth skin, assuring herself that she was once again whole and sound. Her leg wasn't a blackened, burnt mess, and her skin was smooth and showed no signs of the horrific ways Beelzebub and Asmodeus had torn it apart and put it back together again so they could destroy her in a new way. It had been a game to them, her in never-ending agony.

Julie was coated in sweat, and she was trembling. The sheets were tangled around her legs so that she knew she had been thrashing around, and she was sure she had been screaming. But somehow Dean was still asleep next to her. He was rolled over so that she could not see his face, but she knew he must be asleep. If he was conscious, he would not be able to bear hearing her scream and beg like she had surely been doing.

Julie carefully got out of the motel bed, making sure not to disturb Dean. She wiped the tears from her eyes and stripped, stepping into the shower to run cold water over her body. She wasn't in hell. She was here on earth in some shitty motel with Sam and Dean, and she had been alive for a month now. She was okay, at least physically.

The nightmares had been getting less frequent, and Julie had hoped they were ending. But they still came occasionally, and they never ceased to be horrible. Her memories of hell were so vivid that it usually took a lot of gentle words and soothing touches from whichever brother woke up first to bring her back to reality.

Julie had no idea how Sam and Dean had done it without help. They were stronger than her, she knew that, but they hadn't really been able to put themselves back together, either. They still bore the mental scars of hell, and they would never heal or go away, and neither of them would ever be okay again.

It was horrible to think of what those good, brave men who she loved so dearly had to endure. Julie pushed those painful thoughts away and dried herself off. She pulled on a cotton robe and dried her hair as best she could before stepping back into the motel room.

Immediately, she knew something was wrong. Dean was twitching, and his bare chest was shiny with sweat. As she watched, confused and concerned, he rolled over and moaned in pain, his brow furrowed. He was having a nightmare, too, Julie realized. No wonder he hadn't woken up—he was going through his own little bit of hell.

Dean made a pitiful noise that made Julie sick to her stomach. He suddenly thrashed violently, and Julie was finally snapped out of whatever spell that had held her there, staring at him. She rushed to the side of the bed and touched Dean's face, saying over and over, "Dean, it's okay. You're okay. I'm here. Dean, honey, wake up!"

But he wouldn't, or couldn't. Julie began to panic as Dean begged, "Please, stop. Help me, _please_!" His voice broke, and there was so much pain etched in his face, and every muscle in his body was straining, and she couldn't seem to wake him up.

Julie was panicking. This was her own little nightmare, seeing Dean in any kind of pain, even a memory. She shook his shoulder, crying, "Dean, honey! You're okay! _Dean_!"

* * *

><p><em>Dean strained against the cold metal bars that held him strapped to the table. The table where Alastair was doing his own "procedure" on Dean. He had told Dean as he strapped the damned man to the table how he enjoyed taking people apart to see how they worked. He was extremely curious to see what made Dean tick. And so the demon had slowly began to carve at him, peeling away layers of skin and muscle, straight to the bone, trying to see what would break Dean first.<em>

_Dean screamed through gritted teeth as Alastair stripped the muscles off of his thigh. "I can stop, Dean," the demon said almost gently. "I'll stop hurting you right now, and all this pain will go away. Just join me-"_

"_No," Dean groaned. "No, you son of a bitch, I would never…"_

"_You've been saying that for a decade now," Alastair sighed. "And I'm impressed, Dean, I really am. You fought long and hard. You're a hero. Now give into your nature."_

"_No," Dean repeated, but he hesitated slightly this time._

_Alastair latched onto that slight hesitation and cut into Dean with a new passion. Dean twitched and fought and screamed until he finally couldn't even move. He just lay there, sobbing silently, as the demon slowly destroyed him. He should have been dead long ago, but he couldn't die, and it would never end…_

"_One little word, Dean," Alastair said teasingly. His blade teasingly traced the outline of Dean's mouth. "One word and I'll stop." He sliced Dean's bottom lip open and hot, thick blood poured into the poor, broken hunter's mouth. "It'll all end, all the pain, all the fighting. You can step off this rack and do what you were made for. And you'll never have to watch Sammy die again, or see someone hurt that woman again, because it won't hurt you anymore. Just say yes, Dean. Just use the Blade."_

_And suddenly, Alastair wasn't Alastair anymore. He was Beelzebub, speaking in his smooth, charming voice. "I'll spare them," the Knight of Hell assured Dean. "I'll set them aside, and they'll be able to live together, safe from harm. I'll even throw in the angel."_

_Dean finally saw them, kneeling behind Beelzebub. There was blood on Sammy's face, and Julie looked pale and weak, and two demons held knives to their throats, a split second away from slitting their throats. He wanted to cry out, but he had no voice. A pathetic gurgle was all that came out of his broken body._

"_They'll be safe, and you will never feel pain again," Beelzebub said gently. "You won't have to fight any longer, Dean. You can be yourself. Just say yes. Just step off that rack, take up the Blade, and everything will be okay."_

"It's okay, Dean. You're okay._" It was Julie's voice, but it wasn't coming from the weak, scared one he saw before him. He felt the nagging sensation that there was something else, somewhere else he needed to be…_

"_Just give in," Beelzebub urged him, holding out the First Blade, and the metal bar holding Dean's arm down disappeared, and suddenly his arm was intact. He found his fingers reaching for the familiar First Blade, stretching towards it and the peace it promised him._

_Sam and Julie and Cas would be saved. He wouldn't have to fight it anymore. He could be himself, and quit pretending to be some good hero. He wasn't. He was evil, a murderer and a torturer like this demon before him. Like Alastair._

_Dean's fingers brushed the Blade, and then Julie's voice reached him. _

"Dean, honey, _wake up_!"

His eyes flew open and he took a huge, gasping breath. Slowly, he got his racing heart and wild breaths under control and found himself staring up at a wide-eyed, terrified Julie.

"Dean, are you…?" she started to ask, but then she stopped.

Dean couldn't think of a single word to say. Julie lay down beside Dean and wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in his shoulder until slowly he quit shaking. But even as the horror and the pain from that nightmare of hell faded, Beelzebub's words didn't.

"_Just give in. You can be yourself. You won't have to fight any longer. Everything will be okay. Just say yes."_

* * *

><p>"Is he doing any better?" Julie asked Sam softly.<p>

"Well, he's drunk. Not sure if that's better or worse." Sam smirked bitterly as he studied his older brother through the motel window. The man sat outside on the hood of the Impala, leaning back against the windshield, taking another swig of his beer. He didn't look any more tired or haggard than normal. The stubble on his jaw was thicker than normal, and there were dark circles on his eyes, but those weren't exactly new.

Sam had woken up to hear Julie crying Dean's name over and over, sounding panicked. By the time he got out of bed and unlocked the door to their motel room, Julie had woken Dean up from his nightmare, and she was holding his brother, trying to get him to calm down. Once Dean became fully conscious, he was ashamed to have Sam and Julie see him like this, and he locked himself in the bathroom until he was fully composed. He had then proceeded to get drunk at not even eight in the morning.

Things had been going so well, too! They had just finished up their first real hunt since killing the vampires who murdered Thomas Carters two weeks ago. Julie was upset because of the reminder of her father's death, and she was miserable because of her nightmares of hell, but also because of her concern for Dean and the affect the Blade would have on him. And Dean had been getting slowly but surely more surly and closed-off. Sam had watched this happen before, but it hadn't been anywhere near this quickly. And he was forced to watch miserably as his brother slowly began to drift away.

A hunt had been just what they needed, and they had solved the haunting in a couple of days. It had been oddly invigorating, investigating and salt-and-burning once again, like the good old days. Dean had laughed like he hadn't in a while, and Sam and Julie had felt encouraged, seeing him back to normal.

Or so they thought. Clearly, things were not getting better. Julie had been so shaken after seeing Dean like that, and even Sam was a bit overwhelmed. This was all happening too quickly. He was supposed to have Dean for _months_, and they were supposed to kill all the Knights of Hell before they got anywhere near losing Dean…

"I should go talk to him," Sam sighed. The last thing Dean needed was to think he was alone in this.

"Alright," Julie whispered, watching Dean with a sad expression.

Sam grabbed a beer for himself out of the cooler they always kept handy and left the motel to walk over to his brother. Dean didn't even glance up as Sam approached.

"Move over, Dean," Sam ordered. "You do not have to take up the entire hood of the car."

Dean smirked ever so slightly, and Sam felt gratified. "Fine, you floppy-haired bastard," he muttered, shifting so Sam could sit on the hood of the Impala as well.

Sam smirked slightly, settling down next to his brother. They both took long drinks of their beers and didn't speak for a long moment.

"Did she send you out here to check on me?" Dean asked flatly after a moment. "Because I'm fine, Sam-"

"Well, first of all, that's bullshit," Sam said. "And no, Julie didn't send me, although she's worried about you, that's for sure."

"It was just a nightmare," Dean muttered. "Nothing new."

Sam studied his brother for a moment, trying to figure out the best way to say this. "Dean…you remember a few years ago, when I was having those hallucinations of Lucifer?"

"Hard to forget the devil driving my little brother crazy," Dean muttered darkly.

"Well, Dean…that was like living a nightmare. There was no way I would have gotten through that if you weren't there for me. You were there for me when I needed you, Dean, but if you're not going to let Julie and I be there for you-"

"I'm _fine_, Sam!" Dean snapped. "Really." He took a deep breath. "Look, I just…it was just a nightmare. I'm just usually better at hiding them from Julie. It's nothing new, nothing to be worried about. Just good old, screwed-up me."

Sam wanted to help his brother, but he couldn't find the right words to say. Finally, he just sighed and said, "Okay, Dean. Just…just know that we're here for you, okay? I know you can get through this, and Julie does too. You just have to believe it yourself."

"Right. Okay, Sammy." Sam was pretty sure his brother was just saying that to make him happy, but there was no point in fighting Dean.

Both brothers sighed and took another swig of their beers in unison. Sam wanted more than anything to be able to help Dean, but this was his problem and his battle. Once again, Sam was helpless to help his big brother, and he was getting sick and tired of feeling so useless while Dean was in pain.

"Guys?" Dean and Sam both looked up as Julie stuck her head out of the motel room. She looked concerned. "Look, I'm really sorry, but…something just came up on the police radar. There was another death on that abandoned McGrath farm just a couple hours ago."

"What?" Sam asked. "But we just torched that ghost!"

"They think it was a suicide," Julie explained. "But it seems really weird, you know, since there was just a case there. I was thinking we should try to see what's going on once the police leave."

Sam glanced over at Dean, who stood up and chucked his empty beer bottle into a nearby trashcan. "Let's get to work," he said flatly.

* * *

><p>It was just after dark when the police finally wrapped up their investigation and left the McGrath farm abandoned. The three hunters, who had been waiting in the Impala, cleverly parked in a small patch of bushes and trees and hidden from view, quickly got out of the car and crept across the property of the farm to the abandoned barn where a young woman had been found dead, having been shot by her boyfriend. He had confessed to the police near tears, saying he had no idea why he had done it, except that a strange, mysterious, wonderful woman had told him to, and he had been forced to. Of course, no authority would buy that, and no mysterious woman could be found.<p>

Sam, Dean, and Julie had been there just yesterday, to put to rest a ghost of a man who had hung himself in the rafters of his barn and had done the same to a couple of teenagers who had sneaked into the barn to smoke some drugs. This seemed to be something else, though. If it was a supernatural occurrence, and not just a lying murderer, there were many things it could be. A seductive ghost, a demon, a shifter, a siren…they had come prepared for just about any monster possible, armed with silver, bronze, and demon-killing knives, and plenty of salt and guns as well.

Still, Julie was feeling very uneasy. Part of it was her concern for Dean, yes. She was worried about what another hunt would do to him in this fragile state. But it also seemed odd that another possible case had just popped up. Almost like whatever it was wanted to be found, and was maybe even coming to them…

Sam carefully opened the barn door and led them inside, shining his flashlight in all the corners of the dark barn. The three hunters checked every inch of the place in tense silence, but it was soon clear that there was nothing in this barn to even suggest a monster or something else evil.

"Split up?" Dean muttered after five minutes of searching.

Sam and Julie exchanged a worried look in the dim light of their flashlights. Dean sighed. "Don't worry about me, okay? I'm still Dean Winchester. I can take care of myself long enough to look around this place. I don't need a babysitter."

"That's not what we-" Sam started.

"Let's just split up," Dean snapped. "I can take the area around the house. Sam, you got the field?"

"Sure," Sam sighed. "Julie, you want to keep searching the area around here and those couple of sheds?"

"Fine," Julie sighed, still watching Dean with a concerned expression.

The three hunters split up. Dean looked around the abandoned house, shining his flashlight into bushes and trees and then finally peeping through the boarded-up windows. He found nothing, so he kept searching.

Dean was just thinking about kicking the door of the abandoned house down and searching through it when a woman asked in a smooth, attractive voice, "Dean?"

He whirled around, raising his gun, and then froze. An absolute bombshell stood in front of him, her long, dark hair falling in luscious curls down to her huge rack. Her face was almost too pretty, and her body was long and tan and curvy. She wore a very low-cut tank top and extremely short shorts, showing off as much of her tan, toned body as she could. Everything from her big, dark eyes to her full lips to her sexy body was perfect, and despite the fact that Dean knew he should be fighting, he was stunned for a moment.

"Hey," she said, somehow seeming both shy and innocent and sexy at the same time. She smiled slyly at him. "I was hoping I'd find you here."

Dean's head cleared a little as he remembered that he was hunting her. Dean cocked his gun and snapped, "Move and I'll shoot."

"It won't hurt me," the woman said calmly.

"What are you?" Dean snapped. "Because I'm pretty sure I've got something that will hurt you."

"If you're referring to the First Blade in your jacket there, we both know you're bluffing," she smirked slightly. She stepped closer to him, and there was something so sexy about the fluid way she moved that Dean forgot to take a step back. She looked up at him from under thick, dark eyelashes and smiled slightly. "It's not worth killing little old me to go dark, now is it, Dean?"

"How do you know about that?" he asked shakily.

"I know a lot of things," the gorgeous woman sighed. "My employer told me all about you, Dean. And I'm supposed to make you do things…such horrible things…" Dean's grip on the gun, which was going slack, tightened up, but she gave him such a sad, sweet look that he hesitated.

"But now, seeing you…you're not a monster, Dean," she continued. "You're a good man. I see that now. I could never do what he wanted me to do. Not to you."

She was standing so close to him that he could feel the warmth radiating off of her and smell her sweet perfume. Why wasn't he backing up? She was talking about doing horrible things to him!

"What…what did he want you to do to me?" Dean asked shakily.

The beautiful woman raised her hand and ran her fingers through Dean's hair. Something about her scent and her gorgeous looks and her soothing, pleasant voice was making him heavy. He dropped his gun, but neither of them noticed. She stretched up to kiss Dean and stopped, her lips an inch from his.

"He wanted me to make you kill your brother," the woman whispered.

That snapped Dean out of the spell he was under, but before he could fight her off, the woman had grabbed his face and was kissing him. After a couple of seconds, he threw her off and stared at her, chest heaving.

"What did you…what are you?" he asked angrily, but he was finding it hard to think clearly. He wanted to be angry with this woman…but, god, she was so wonderful and beautiful, _perfect_…

"I'm a siren, Dean, sweetie," the woman smiled. "And you're mine now."

* * *

><p>Sam jogged up to Julie, who had her back to him, surveying the dark yard before her. "Any luck?" he asked as he reached her.<p>

Julie jumped, and then smacked his arm. "Sam, don't scare me like that!" she snapped.

"What happened to you being a hardened hunter?" he smirked back.

"Shut up," Julie muttered. "Anyway, I haven't found anything. No signs of a monster or anything. I think the guy was just crazy."

"Yeah, me neither," Sam sighed. "I guess we can talk to him tomorrow, but there's not much point in hanging around here if there's nothing to find."

"Guess we just find Dean," Julie sighed, pulling out her phone and hitting speed dial one. Her phone rang for a couple seconds before she realized she heard a phone going off behind her.

Julie turned around and hung up, smiling slightly at Dean. "There you are," she said. "We were about to go find you. We don't think there's a monster around here."

"You're wrong," Dean said flatly, and then he suddenly lunged forward without warning and his hands closed around Julie's throat.

It was odd. She had seen him beat demons and monsters with his own bare hands, watched Dean kick down doors, watched him wipe out an entire nest of vampires without breaking a sweat and even watched him kill a Knight of Hell, but Julie had never really realized how strong Dean was until he was crushing her windpipe. Julie was too shocked to struggle as Dean choked the life out of her. Her head was spinning by this unimaginable turn of events and the sudden cutoff of oxygen to her brain, and everything was going fuzzy.

Sam had been staring at his brother in shock, unable to comprehend what was happening. This couldn't be Dean, because Dean would never lay so much as a finger on Julie. So be it shape shifter, demon, or even the Mark and the Blade controlling him, this wasn't Dean. He wasn't going to stop, and so Sam had to make him.

"Dean!" Sam cried, snapping out of his shock and tackling his brother. It took all of Sam's strength to pry Dean's hands off of Julie and she collapsed, gasping for air. The two brothers struggled for a moment until Sam pushed Dean a few steps back and stepped protectively between Julie and Dean. He offered her an arm to pull herself up with as he stared at Dean, shocked and horrified. "What the hell was that, Dean?" he snapped.

"Christo," Julie coughed out in a hoarse voice. Dean didn't flinch but glared unblinkingly at Julie. So he wasn't a demon, then. Shifter, maybe?"

"Don't you worry, this is Dean alright," a woman's smooth, pleasant voice said, and Sam and Julie both stared, wide-eyed, as a truly gorgeous woman stepped out of the shadows to stand next to Dean. She brushed her long dark curls out her beautiful face and smiled pleasantly at them.

Sam swallowed a few times, trying to get over how ridiculously beautiful she was. "Who…_what_ are you, and what are you doing to my brother?" Sam asked her darkly, finally finding his voice as Julie touched his arm and he remembered who the enemy was and who was on his side. This woman, whoever she was, sure didn't seem to be.

"My name is Cynthia," the beautiful woman said sweetly. "I am one of the oldest and most powerful sirens alive."

A siren. Julie somehow hated this unfairly beautiful woman who was controlling her boyfriend even more. This monster had somehow managed to transfer her poison through saliva, probably by kissing Dean, and now she was manipulating him into doing whatever she wanted. She could make Dean try to choke the life out of Julie, she could control his body, make him a great new sex toy, she could make Dean kill himself…the thought made Julie's blood boil.

"And you're controlling my brother?" Sam asked darkly. "Bad idea, _Cynthia_. Demons and angels have been trying to control him for years, and there hasn't been a single one of them who can tell Dean what to do and not end up dead."

"But I'm not telling him what to do. Am I, sweetheart?" the siren asked Dean sweetly, shooting a glowing smile towards him.

Dean put his hands on Cynthia's waist and then, right in front of Julie, they kissed, sticking their tongues down each other's throats. Red colored her vision as jealousy filled Julie, causing blood to roar in her ears. She understood a bit how Sam must have felt back when he loved Julie, and he would have to watch Dean and Julie kiss in front of him.

But this was different. Dean loved her, and she loved him, and Dean was _hers_. That siren was beyond dead. Julie was going to hack that bitch to pieces.

Dean and Cynthia pulled apart, and Dean turned to face Julie, his green eyes filled with contempt. It hurt her more than many of the physical pains and tortures she had endured over the years, even if it was just the siren's control over him causing Dean to look at her like that.

"I was hired by Beelzebub," Cynthia sighed, stroking Dean's arm. "My job was to find you three and make Dean kill one of you. It was supposed to be Sam, because the moment Dean killed his own brother, he'd be so far gone that there would be no coming back from that, not ever. But if all I really have to do is make my lovely Dean kill someone he cares about so that he'll go dark…I'd much rather it be you."

Cynthia's beautiful dark eyes landed on Julie. "See, handsome Dean here is easily one of the most…_enjoyable _men I've vanquished. But somewhere inside of him, he's still got feelings for you, Julie Carters. It's quite annoying, so I gave him an ultimatum. Either he can take you out of the picture…or we can never be together."

Julie hated to admit it, but she was worried. Normally, she wouldn't be worried. She had never been afraid that Dean would hurt her; she had been afraid for him and of what he might become, but she had never believed even for a second that Dean, _her_ Dean, would do anything to hurt her if he didn't have her best interests in mind.

But this siren…she was undeniably beautiful, more beautiful than Julie. And she seemed very powerful. And on top of everything, Dean had already been struggling to control himself with the Mark of Cain and the First Blade driving him to kill. With all of that combined…part of Julie believed Dean might actually kill her. He had already attempted to once.

And sure enough, Dean took a step towards Julie threateningly, reaching inside his jacket to pull out the First Blade. Julie bit back a scream. This was her worst nightmare, worse than tortures in hell. _Dean _killing her, _Dean's _hands ripping her apart, _Dean's _cold eyes being the last thing she ever saw, his cruel laugh the last thing she ever heard.

"Dean…" she pleaded, taking a step back.

He frowned. "Cynthia…do I have to?" Dean asked the siren, not taking his eyes off of Julie.

"If you want to be happy with me," the siren said softly, coaxingly.

Dean gave in, her expression growing hard once more. He pulled out the First Blade and stepped towards Julie.

Before she could do more than panic, though, someone stepped in front of her. Sam. He shielded her with his body, glaring at his brother, or rather the siren controlling him.

"Dean, this isn't you," Sam said darkly. "You love Julie way too much to ever hurt her, let alone try to _kill _her. But if you try it again, I _will _stop you."

"You can't, Sam," Dean sighed. "Not when I have the Blade. I'm stronger than you."

"But you don't want to hurt me, or Julie," Sam insisted. "You can fight this bitch, and you can stop her from controlling you. You won't kill me, or Julie."

"Let's see who's right," Cynthia smirked, and Dean lunged forward.

Sam was ready. He dodged Dean's first swipe with the First Blade. It was far sloppier than any attempt to kill someone Dean would ever make, and for a moment Sam was filled with hope. There was a part of Dean trying to fight the siren controlling him, and if Sam could just reach that part…

But that part wasn't doing so hot. Because Dean lunged forward again, and this swipe came dangerously close to Sam's head. The younger brother barely dodged the Blade and then grabbed Dean's arm, trying to wrestle the powerful weapon out of Dean's hands.

"Get out of the way, Sam," Dean growled.

"No," Sam growled back. "Dean, just stop. Fight this!"

"Dean, sweetheart, think about us," Cynthia said softly, her voice carrying easily to Dean.

Filled with a new fury, Dean slugged Sam hard in the jaw and they broke apart. Sam shook his head to clear it and pulled out a bronze knife. Dean lunged forward again, but his strike was once again slower than normal, allowing Sam to block it and try to force his brother back.

"Just let me kill that bitch, and she can't control you, Dean!" Sam cried desperately, when Dean stood his ground. Dean obviously was using all of his remaining willpower not to kill Sam, but he still seemed bent on killing Julie, and Sam knew he couldn't beat his brother when he was hopped up on the Blade and the Mark. He'd have to get through to him somehow.

"You won't lay a hand on her," Dean growled protectively.

Sam was desperate. He couldn't hurt Dean, but there was no way he was going to be able to get to the siren and kill her as long as Dean was here protecting her…

Dean suddenly lunged forward again, throwing Sam to the side. Instinctively, Sam lashed out, and his blade nicked Dean's forearm, getting the tip wet with his brother's blood. Sam hit the ground hard, but Dean ignored his brother, clearly not wanting to kill him. Instead, he advanced on Julie.

She took a couple steps back, trembling. "Dean, please," she whispered. "Don't do this. I don't want to have to fight you…"

Dean said nothing, but marched towards her, face hard. Julie had rarely been more terrified than she was now, and she drew her knife with a shaking hand. She couldn't hurt him, but if she didn't defend herself, Dean would kill her.

"Dean-" Julie tried again desperately.

"Shut up," he growled, lashing out with the First Blade.

Julie deflected his first swipe, but within a couple of seconds, Dean struck again. Over and over he swung the First Blade at her, and while he wasn't quite up to his normal fighting caliber, Julie knew he was stronger and a better fighter than her. She was going to lose.

Sure enough, Dean suddenly performed a clever move with the Blade and disarmed Julie. His fist shot out and he struck her on the cheek. Julie stumbled back into the wall of the barn, but there was nowhere to go, and he was closing in, and he was going to kill her…

"Dean, please," Julie begged him softly, tears in her eyes. "Don't do this. Come back to me."

Dean hesitated, and for a second there was something familiar in his eyes. Then Cynthia cried, "Don't listen to her, Dean! She's just manipulating you! Take care of her now, so that you can be with me forever, like you want to be."

Dean's jaw twitched, and he looked slightly conflicted, but then his face hardened and he raised the First Blade. Julie knew she should scream or try to run or fight, but she couldn't. She could only watch as the man she loved swung his Blade to kill her.

And then Sam drove a bronze knife covered in the blood of someone under her spell, the only thing that could kill a siren, into the monster's back.

Cynthia wailed in agony and then slumped to the ground, dead. Dean froze, and suddenly life came back to his green eyes. He looked around, confused, at his brother, who had just killed the monster, to Julie, who was backed up against the wall, staring up at Dean with terror in her eyes.

And then Dean slowly realized what had happened. He realized what that bitch siren had done to him, what he had done to Sammy, what he had been about to do to Jules…

No siren should have been able to push him to that. There was only one explanation for the siren having that much power over him.

It was the Blade in his hands. The one that gave him awful nightmares each night, the one that filled him with such power and evil, the one he could not force his hand to release.

The one that, even now, with the spell broken, was still screaming for Dean to drive it into Julie's heart and kill the woman he loved.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter Twenty-Eight**

The whole drive back to the motel, Sam watched Dean out of the corner of his eye through the rearview mirror. His brother sat in stunned silence, hunched up as if wishing he could disappear. It had been a long time since he had seen Dean look this guilty and shocked, since the night that Julie died, actually.

Dean hadn't spoken since Sam killed Cynthia and freed his brother from her spell. There had been a long, tense moment right after Dean snapped out of it, when he stood there in front of Julie and he wouldn't drop the Blade. Finally, Sam simply said his brother's name, and Dean released the First Blade. Sam had quickly picked it up, and he had waited for Julie to rush to Dean and put her arms around him and comfort him like she always did.

But instead, she just stood there and stared at Dean, still looking a little afraid of him. And who could blame her? That man had just attempted to kill her. Twice. But…it was _Dean_. She loved him, and he loved her. They would be okay. Sam kept telling himself that as he burned the siren's corpse and gently guided Julie and Dean to the car. Neither one had spoken in almost half an hour, and Sam was starting to get really concerned.

Julie rode in silence in the passenger seat next to Sam. She was pale, but she at least seemed to be recovering from what had just happened. By the time they got back to the motel, Julie stopped Dean in the doorway and said gently, "Dean, look, can we talk about-?"

"I can't," he whispered, unable to meet her eyes. "Please, I just…I can't right now." Julie looked a little hurt, but mostly concerned. "I'm sorry," Dean added in a whisper, and then he stepped into his motel room and closed the door.

Julie stood there, feeling a little lost. That was her room too, but it was clear Dean needed to be alone. She wasn't sure what to do, and then Sam put a large hand on her shoulder. "You can stay in my room tonight, if you want," he offered.

And so Julie slept in a separate bed from Dean once again. This time felt different than the last time they had slept apart, when they were fighting. This was a one time thing. Dean just needed to fix things with himself. That was all. It had better be.

Sam insisted Julie take the bed, so he stretched out on a slightly battered couch in the motel room and attempted to drift off. He couldn't sleep though, and he doubted Julie was doing so well either.

Sure enough, after maybe thirty minutes of attempting to sleep, Julie's voice asked softly, "Sam?"

"Hmm?"

"Dean…what the siren made him do…that was all her, right? All her and not…"

Sam tensed up at the concern and fear in Julie's voice. "That was all the siren's doing," he assured Julie. "Well…her and the Blade and the Mark. But Dean…he would never-"

"I know!" Julie said quickly. "I know he would never try to hurt me. I just…I don't know. I'm worried about him."

Sam smirked bitterly. "If you weren't, _I_ would be worried. I wish so badly that we could help him. I wish I could do this instead of him. But it's got to be his battle, and if he won't let us help him…"

"We'll make him," Julie muttered defiantly, and Sam smiled slightly in the dark. God, how had Dean survived without this woman? Dean was a ball of guilt and grief and anger and pain held together by duct tape and Sam, and the Mark of Cain and the First Blade were threatening to undo him. Without Julie to put him back together before and to try and hold him together now, Dean would crash and burn.

Sam was reminded suddenly of another young, sweet, beautiful blond woman. Jessica Moore, the woman who had represented happiness and safety and a normal life to him. He had loved her so much, and lost her, and it would have destroyed him if it weren't for Dean. Now he wanted to be able to help save Dean, but if his brother wouldn't let him…

Sam pushed those thoughts away and tried to sleep. Things would be better in the morning, or at least he really hoped they would.

* * *

><p>The next morning, Sam checked to make sure Dean was still here, and that he hadn't run off, and then he stepped outside and dialed a familiar number. Castiel picked up on the third ring and asked, "Sam? Is everything alright?"<p>

Sam laughed bitterly. "Uh, no. Look, Cas…I'm worried about Dean. He's not doing so hot with this whole Blade thing."

"What exactly is wrong with him?" Cas asked, concerned.

"Last night…well, last night, a siren found us and put Dean under her spell. Then she forced him to fight me and attempt to kill Julie. And he's really messed up about it. And he's having nightmares too, and I just don't know what to do…"

"I am not sure what to do either, Sam," Cas admitted. "I've never seen anything like this. Nobody has, not since Cain."

"I know, Cas," Sam sighed. "I just thought you should know since he's your…" What even was Dean to Cas? He wanted to say friend, but it almost seemed like something more. Cas was the one who pulled Dean out of hell, the one he spent a year with in Purgatory. Sam supposed they were best friends, but there was a deeper bond between them than that. They were connected, and Sam knew what it would do to the angel if he had to watch Dean go dark and eventually "put him down."

Castiel sighed. "I wish…I wish I could go to him. But the angels…we are in turmoil. Metatron is keeping us busy, sending his angel and demon minions alike after us to keep up from doing much in the way of helping you. It's all I can do to keep my brothers and sisters together as is."

Sam sighed. Everything was falling to pieces. He couldn't ask anything of Cas, not when he had an angel war to fight. And Crowley…he didn't trust that demon well enough to bring him in on this.

It looked like it was just Sam, Dean, and Julie.

Sam said goodbye to Cas and stepped into his motel room. Julie had gone out to get some food before they hit the road and headed back to the bunker. Sam had to assume that Dean was still in his motel room.

Sam wandered over to the dresser and found himself staring at the bundle of brown cloth in front of him. He knew what was in there, and for a moment he wanted nothing more than to smash it to pieces or burn it or throw it into the ocean for what it was doing to his brother. But if they ever wanted to kill another Knight, they would need it.

"Keep it," a hoarse voice said behind him, and Sam whirled around to see Dean standing in his room. He must have opened the adjoining door, and Sam hadn't even noticed. Dean looked pale and tired and worn, and he was purposefully looking anywhere but at the weapon sitting on the dresser.

"Dean-" Sam started.

"Keep the Blade, Sam," Dean said firmly. "Keep it and make sure I don't even touch that thing until I'm face to face with a Knight."

"But, Dean-" the younger Winchester tried again.

"Keep it away from me, Sammy!" Dean pleaded. "Please, I…I can't let it do that to me again. Because no siren, I don't care how powerful, could make me do that to you and Jules. It's going to turn me into something I don't want to be, and if I hurt either of you…"

Dean looked down, ashamed, as tears welled up in his eyes. "Okay, Dean," Sam assured his brother. "I'll keep it away from you. But…you know that if you don't kill with the Blade, you'll start to…to…"

"To die?" his brother smirked bitterly. "Oh, well. Let's just hope I find those Knights first."

Sam swallowed. "Dean, I can't just let you die, because that's what will happen if you don't use it! What if you just use it on monsters?"

"Don't you get it, Sammy?" Dean snapped. "Every time I kill something with that Blade, a part of me dies. If I keep killing, the human part of me is going to die, and then I could very well end up killing you and Julie, and I can't let that happen."

"Dean…" Sam stopped, knowing that as much as he hated to admit it, his brother was right. He sighed. "Alright. Fine. But we're going to find the Knights and we're going to kill them before we ever have to worry about something happening to you. You got it?"

Dean smirked, but his eyes were hollow and tired. "Okay, Sammy," he whispered, looking about a thousand years old.

Dean knew he wouldn't last long enough to find and kill every one of those Knights. But whatever kept his baby brother happy…that was what was important.

* * *

><p>The next week seemed to stretch on for months to Julie. Part of it, she was sure, was how boring it was, digging through books of lore and going through every death or weird occurrence in all of the country that could possibly be the doing of a Knight of Hell. The only breaks she ever got from the research was to eat, sleep, or call Castiel. She and Sam were trying to do their best to keep the angel updated on everything that was happening so he wouldn't feel so bad about not being with his best friend in such a rough time.<p>

But Julie wasn't sure how much having Cas around would really help Dean. He was doing his best to shut everyone out, surely to keep them safe after what had happened with that siren, but it was killing Julie.

Every day, Dean would look slightly paler. The circles under his eyes were slowly but surely getting darker. At one point, Julie walked into the room to find Dean clutching the wall for support. Once he knew she was there, he pretended he was fine, but she knew what she had seen.

Dean hadn't killed anything in three weeks, since that hunt with the vampires. Julie wasn't sure how long the Blade and Mark would allow him to go without killing, but judging by the way he was slowly deteriorating, she would guess not very much longer.

Julie wanted more than anything to try to help him, but Dean was avoiding her as much as possible. And it wasn't because of anything she had done. He just couldn't look at her without his eyes suddenly filling with guilt and pain. Every time he looked at Julie, he saw the fear in her eyes right before he tried to kill her, felt his hands closing around her throat. What he had done was inexcusable no matter what sort of spell he was under, and there was no way Julie could forgive him.

Except that she had. Julie had forgiven Dean the day after he tried to kill her, and she had told him so. He hadn't replied, just looked down and flinched ever-so-slightly when she touched his arm. That night, they had slept in the same bed, but Dean had kept his distance from her. Julie had been upset, but the distance between them didn't feel like it had a few months ago, right before she died. Julie didn't doubt that Dean loved her; in fact, somehow this guilt and pain he was filled with that was keeping him away from her somehow proved he loved her even more.

But Julie was getting tired of it. So a week after returning to the bunker, Julie walked into the room where Dean sat at a wooden table, reading a book of lore he had read twice before, carrying a plate with a couple of sandwiches on it, on a mission.

"Eat," Julie ordered Dean, sitting down next to him and pushing the plate in front of him.

Dean hesitated. "You haven't eaten anything all day," she snapped. "Now eat the food I made before I feed it to you like you're two."

The shadow of a smirk twitched across Dean's mouth, and he picked up one of the sandwiches. He took a bite and nodded. "Thanks," he muttered once he had swallowed.

For a moment, his green eyes met her blue ones, and the space between them was charged with all the things they hadn't been saying for a week.

"I'm sorry-" Dean blurted suddenly.

"Stop it," Julie snapped, and he blinked, startled. "That's about the only thing you've said to me for the past week. 'I'm sorry.' Well, I forgive you, Dean. I did a week ago."

"But I haven't forgiven myself," Dean muttered, looking down again.

"Big surprise," Julie said sarcastically, and Dean looked up once again, surprised by the amount of attitude she was giving him right now. "Dean Winchester is struggling with guilt, and he can't forgive himself, and he's blaming himself for everything little thing that's ever gone wrong. What else is new?"

"It _was_ my fault," he muttered darkly. "_I _was the one who tried to kill you and the one who fought Sam."

"Under the influence of a monster and the First Blade," Julie shot back. "The real you would never have laid a finger on either of us."

"But it still happened, and it's inexcusable!" he snapped, unable to understand how Julie wasn't angry about what he had tried to do to her.

"Funny, because I'm excusing it," she said. "Now, you need to do the same and move on. I'm fine. Sam's fine. The only one we're worried about is you."

"I'm fine," Dean muttered, looking down, and Julie laughed bitterly.

"Funny, because it seems like the only time you ever say that is when you're on the verge of falling apart."

"Which for me is always," Dean said sarcastically to cover up the truth of those words. "I don't even know why you're still here, Julie. Why do you put up with me? Why didn't you just get out when you had the chance? Why don't you now?"

Julie's face softened as she realized he was honestly asking. Julie reached out and touched Dean's arm, and for the first time in a week, he let her. "Dean…I honestly don't know why I stayed at first, when I first met you. I must just have a thing for really dangerous guys. I would have been a lot safer if I had just left…but now I'm in this. I'm a part of this as much as you and Sam, and shutting us out isn't going to keep us safe. Leaving us won't keep us safe. The Knights will just find us and use us as bait. And pushing us away will just make you lose yourself faster. Please, just let us help you!"

Dean swallowed. He looked very conflicted, but then suddenly he lifted his head and looked Julie right in the eye and said, "Okay."

Julie blinked, surprised that had worked. "Really?"

"Yeah. I…I need help. I don't want to become what I almost did last time and…I need help, Jules. I can't do this without you and Sammy and Cas…"

"I know," Julie said, her heart breaking at the pain and fear in his eyes. She moved closer and put her arms around Dean, letting him lean into her and take comfort in her touch. "It's okay, Dean. We're going to help you. You'll be okay."

For a long time, they just held each other. Eventually, Dean composed himself and pulled away, back to his tough hunter self. He closed the book or lore on the table and said, "You know what? I am sick and tired of sitting around all day, reading books."

"I know," Julie sighed. "Thankfully, Sam and I, in all of our digging around, have found a case."

"Really?" Dean asked, slightly surprised.

"Yep," Julie said. "There's a town four or so hours east of here, and they've got this huge corn maze. It's a big deal to the locals, and it's supposed to be super complicated or whatever. But in this past week alone, three teenagers went in there and two of them disappeared, and the third one came out screaming and sobbing. They found out later she had just gone insane, and no one could get out of her what happened in there. They closed the place, and when these two cops went in to search the maze, they never came out. No one's going in anymore, but we think it sounds like a case."

"Huh," Dean said. "I haven't heard of any monster like that."

"Sam hadn't either," Julie said. "Looks like we've found the only type of monster on the planet that Sam and Dean haven't ganked yet."

Dean smirked slightly and stood up. "Where are you going?" Julie snapped.

Dean frowned. "To get ready for that hunt."

"Not until you finish your food, you're not."

Dean smirked. "You're joking." He took in Julie's expression and quickly amended, "You're not joking."

"I made that food, and you are going to sit your ass down and eat it and you are going to like it!" Julie ordered him.

All of the sudden, Dean grinned and as he sat back down, he leaned over and kissed Julie for a brief moment. "I love you," he admitted.

Julie grabbed the collar of his jacket and pulled him closer to kiss him back. After a long kiss, Dean pulled away and smirked, "What about eating?"

"God, Dean, it's just food," Julie muttered. "You can eat later." And they both grinned as they leaned in again and kissed, and for one single, shining moment, things felt normal and happy once again.

* * *

><p>Sam and Dean closed their car doors in unison and walked over to the entrance to this infamous corn maze. A few cops stood outside the maze, talking in low, concerned voices.<p>

As the two brothers and Julie approached the policemen, they pulled their badges out of their jackets and casually held them open. "Is there a problem here?" Dean asked the officers.

The oldest man, who looked to be in his late forties with a bushy moustache and beard, asked suspiciously, "If there was, why would you care, agent? Don't the feds have bigger problems than this?"

"Than four disappearances in one week?" Sam asked sharply. "Seems pretty serious to me."

"Five, actually," a young officer muttered.

All three hunters turned to face him. "What?" Dean snapped. "Did you let someone else go in there?"

"It's not our fault!" the young officer snapped. "Some kid sneaked past us when we weren't looking and he ran inside."

"How long has he been in there?" Julie snapped.

"A couple of hours," one of the officers admitted. Sam, Dean, and Julie exchanged concerned glances. They had better get in there fast to save the kid, if he wasn't dead already.

Another officer walked over to them, comforting a thin, pale woman who looked maybe thirty. She was sobbing, and Dean instantly felt sorry for her.

"The mother?" he guessed, nodding towards the sobbing woman.

"Melanie Wolfe," the oldest officer said. "Her son, Johnny, is still in there."

"Not for long," Dean muttered. He started towards the entrance, but one of the police officers moved to block him.

"The hell do you think you're doing?" the officer snapped.

"I'm going to go save that kid instead of sitting on my ass like the rest of you," Dean snapped, and even Sam and Julie were a little surprised by the anger in his voice.

"I don't really like your tone-" the officer started.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I hope I didn't hurt your feelings. Now get out of my way before I make you."

"De…Agent Combs, maybe we should stop and think about this," Sam said carefully, touching his brother's arm.

"There's a kid in there, and who knows what could be happening to him, and I think it is our duty to try to save him," Dean said.

"Everyone who has gone in there in the past week hasn't come out," the youngest officer warned them.

"We'll be okay," Julie said, more to Sam than to the officers. "We know what we're doing."

Dean nodded, and Sam sighed and gave in. The cops gave in and let the three "FBI agents" into the maze.

It was dark out, and there was a pretty strong wind blowing. The corn around the three hunters rustled noisily as the wind blew through it, making it near impossible to hear something sneak up on them. Dean kept his hand near his waist, fingering the gun tucked under the waistband of his dark slacks. Julie checked on the various silver, iron, and bronze blades she kept tucked inside her jacket, and Sam gripped a small canteen of holy water as they walked. They had no idea what to expect, so the hunters had come equipped with every weapon at their disposal, except one.

Dean felt himself wishing that he had the First Blade. There was so much uncertainty in the air, and Dean knew he would feel much more confident if he had the weapon that could kill nearly every creature in existence.

But more importantly, he wouldn't feel so damn weak. Exhaustion was making his limbs heavy, even though he had been sleeping six or seven hours most nights, which was a record for him. He couldn't eat anywhere near his normal amount of food, or else he would just puke it back up. He coughed often, but insisted to Sam and Julie it was just a cold. He tried to hide how truly awful his condition was, but he doubted he was really fooling them.

He was dying. He knew it, and he knew deep down they probably knew it, too. But Dean tried to ignore that fact and pretend it was just another case.

They had been wandering through the vast maze in silence for maybe ten minutes when they heard the first scream.

It was a child's desperate wail, and Julie instinctively grabbed Dean's arm at the sound of a young boy in such fear and pain. The three hunters turned to the west, where the scream had come from, and they were about to take off running when another scream came from the east.

This one was a woman, and she sounded as if she was sobbing, too. They hesitated, unsure what to do.

"Split up," Julie said, knowing how foolish that was in a case like this. But they had no choice. If they saved one victim, but another died because of their refusal to split up, they would never forgive themselves.

The brothers hesitated for a moment, but they knew she was right. "Julie, you go with Dean and save that kid," Sam ordered. "I'll find the woman."

Julie nodded and took off, Dean at her side. They ran through the corn until they came to a fork in the path. Unsure which way led to the child, they froze.

"Which way…?" Dean asked uncertainly.

Julie was torn. Part of her was certain the boy had sounded a little to the south of here, while the other knew he had been only a few yards to the north of here. She didn't want to do this, but she knew she had to.

"You've got you phone, right?" she asked Dean. He pulled his out. "And Sam's got his. So we can reach each other if we have to."

"Right," Dean agreed, obviously understanding what she meant. "I'll go left, you go right?"

"Sure," Julie sighed. She hesitated for half a second and whispered, "Be safe," before taking off down the opposite path.

Julie ran for a while, until her feet were sore and she was out of breath. She was about to give up, certain Dean's path had been the right one, when a small, dirty boy of about seven or eight stumbled onto her path.

Julie dropped to her knees in front of the small, shaking child. He stared at her with big, teary, brown eyes. "Hey, you're okay," Julie assured the young boy. "You're fine. I'm going to get you out of here and back to your mom, okay?"

"He's still in here," the boy whispered.

"What? Who?"

"The…the doctor," he said, sounding terrified. "The one with the big needle, and he said he was going to…to kill me with the big needle!"

The child started sobbing again, and Julie pulled him in for a hug. Once the child had calmed down a bit, she asked, "Johnny—it is Johnny, right?" He nodded, wiping at his nose. "Well, Johnny, where did this doctor go?"

With a small, trembling hand, the boy pointed to the east. The direction that Sam had gone, alone.

Julie pulled out her phone and quickly dialed Sam's number. But she had no service out here, and her phone was useless. She put her phone away, trying to keep her fear and frustration under control. She had to focus on getting this kid out of here safely. Then she could try to find Sam before it was too late.

* * *

><p>Sam wasn't sure how long he'd been running, but it felt like a long time. He was slightly out of breath when he paused briefly. He should have found the woman by now. Of course, he could've taken a wrong turn at any of the forks in the path he had found, but he had just been trying to follow his natural instinct. It had guided him well on many cases, and he hoped it would this time.<p>

The wind changed directions and Sam froze, the cool wind blowing his hair and jacket back. There was something ominous about that wind, about this whole maze mess. Sam had never been on a hunt like this, and something felt very off about it.

Suddenly, a woman's scream came again, and not too far away. He took off running, trying to pinpoint the location before he lost the sound again. It didn't take Sam long at all to find the place where the woman's voice had come from.

However, when he got to the small clearing where the woman's voice had come from, he found it abandoned.

Sam hesitated. He was certain that the scream had come from here, and yet there was no woman in sight. The wind shifted again, and he tensed up, reaching for his gun.

He couldn't explain it, but he could somehow sense that whatever they were hunting was near.

Sam cocked his gun and waited, tense and ready. But nothing happened, and he was beginning to doubt himself when the woman screamed just a couple feet behind him.

He whirled around, but there was no one there. He found himself staring at nothing but corn.

And then a horrifyingly familiar voice laughed lightly and said, "Oh, come _on_, Sam. You really fell for that? That's like the oldest trick in the book! I thought I taught you better than that."

Sam whirled around and pointed his gun at the figure in front of him. Sam wanted to look tough and intimidating, but his hands were shaking slightly, and he was sure he looked as terrified as he felt. There was only one thing in all of creation that could change him from feeling like a hardened hunter to a trembling, terrified kid. And that thing was standing right in front of him.

The tall, attractive, sandy-haired man waved his hand lazily, and Sam's gun flew out of his hands and disappeared into the thick walls of corn. Sam found himself standing terrified and helpless in front of the most evil creature in existence.

That evil creature grinned at him. "Heya, Sammy," Lucifer chuckled. "Did you miss me?"


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter Twenty-Nine**

Dean tensed as he heard footsteps approaching. He cocked his gun and waited, ready to fire, as something came running through the maze towards him.

But it was only Julie. Dean lowered his gun as his beautiful girlfriend appeared, her blond hair wild and windswept. She was holding the hand of a small, dirty little boy. He stared up at Dean with the shell-shocked look of someone who had just experienced true terror.

"Are you guys okay?" he asked them.

"Yeah," Julie said. "Johnny's okay, at least physically."

"What happened?" Dean asked the little boy, kneeling to talk to him at his level.

"The scary doctor with the needle tried to kill me," the boy whispered, clinging to Julie's leg.

Dean glanced up at Julie, confused. She shook her head slightly. "I don't know what's going on, Dean," she said softly as he stood up. "From what Johnny's told me, his biggest fear is going to the doctor to get a shot. I don't know if that means that whatever's in here manifests into your worst fear or what, but I do know we've got to get the kid out of here."

"We've got to find Sam, too," Dean said. "Can't even imagine what it would do to him if he got jumped by evil clowns."

Julie frowned. "Was that a joke?"

"No, the guy's deathly afraid of clowns," Dean said, smirking ever-so-slightly. But deep down, he knew that clowns couldn't really be Sam's worst fear. He had lost his parents and his big brother countless times, watched the woman he loved die, and suffered in the pit of hell with the devil himself for an unimaginable amount of time. Sam had much bigger problems than _clowns_.

"I'll go find him," Julie sighed. "You get Johnny back to his mom."

"What? No! Jules, I'm not leaving you in here," Dean snapped. "I'll go find Sammy, and you can get the kid out of here."

"Dean, you and I both know you're not doing so well," Julie said quietly but intensely. "The last thing you need is to have to fight whatever your worst nightmare would be."

"But, Julie-"

"I'll be fine, Dean! I'll find Sam and we'll both get out just fine."

Dean hesitated, but he knew Julie was right, as usual. She gently pried Johnny off of her leg and said, "Johnny, I'm going to send you with my friend Dean. He's a nice guy. He's going to get you out of here, okay?"

Johnny nodded a couple times and then stared up at Dean with wide, scared eyes. Dean softened a little, seeing this poor, scared kid. He bent a little to talk to Johnny and said, "Hey, it'll be okay. Your mom's right outside this maze, and when I get you out, she'll be right there. You'll be okay. No scary doctors are going to get you, kid. I promise."

Despite the dire situation, Julie stopped to smile at Dean. As much as he tried to deny it, Dean was naturally a good man. Even with the evil of the Mark of Cain and the First Blade in him, he was still so kind and gentle with this scared little boy. Julie wanted to stop and really appreciate how good the man she loved was, but Sam could be in trouble, and he surely needed her help.

"Alright, let's go, kid," Dean said, straightening up. He met Julie's eyes and he suddenly looked very sad. "Jules, stay safe, okay?"

"I will," she whispered, and they took off running in opposite directions.

It took Dean maybe ten minutes to find the way out. He was pretty good with directions, and he had been trying to mark the path he had taken so he could retrace his steps. At one point, Johnny Wolfe stumbled on a rock and fell down. Dean carried the small boy the rest of the way until he finally found his way back to the entrance of the maze.

Johnny's mother shrieked in joy and relief as Dean appeared, carrying her little boy. Dean handed the young boy off to his sobbing mother and nodded at the officers who were all eying him with respect and gratitude.

As much as he wanted to enjoy this small moment of actually feeling like he'd done something right, Dean knew his work wasn't over.

Just as he was about to turn around and go back into the maze, he heard one of the most horrible sounds in the world: his little brother crying out in pain. It was far away, but Dean was certain that was Sam's agonized cry.

Without even a word to the people standing around the entrance, Dean ran back in.

* * *

><p>"You're not real," Sam whispered, digging his thumb into his palm like he had once had to do to fight off the hallucinations of Lucifer that plagued him. But the cut on his hand had healed a long time ago, and besides, this wasn't a hallucination.<p>

"I don't know, Sam," Lucifer shrugged. "I feel pretty real to me. What do you think?"

He raised his hand to hit Sam, and the hunter flinched. The devil slowly shook his head and chuckled as he lowered his hand. "Wow, Sam. All these years later, and you're still terrified of me."

The man began to circle him as he talked. "You never really answered my question though, Sammy boy. Did you miss me? Because I sure missed you, old friend. Things got so boring in the pit without you. While you were running around up here with your brother, saving the world and all that jazz, I was downstairs, having to put up with _my _annoying brother for all eternity. We didn't even have you to play with. It was quite dull."

"How did you get out?" Sam asked, trying to sound cold, but coming off as more curious and nervous.

"I had a backup plan, of course, in case you somehow overpowered me," Lucifer explained. "Sooner or later, the demons would get dissatisfied with their leader, Crowley. He would go soft because of you boys, and the rebellious demons would raise their true leaders, my children, the Knights of Hell. Then Abbadon nearly ruined my plans with her own little campaign, but thankfully your brother took care of that mess. How is Dean, by the way?"

Sam glared at the devil. "Not so well, huh? Well, what else would you expect? He bears the Mark of Cain and the First Blade. Soon enough, he'll go full dark side, and you'll have to kill him, or else he'll kill you and make the demon that gave him the Mark so proud. Good old Cain…I missed him, too. I'll have to pay the father of murder a visit some time, after I've had my fun with you."

"You still didn't explain to me how you got out," Sam said, trying to keep the devil talking until he could figure a way out of this mess.

"Oh, right. Well, you see, Sam, the Knights are my most loyal followers. They are part of the very few demons I will actually allow to live once I rule the earth. And they know this, and so my pride and joy, Beelzebub, has always known that should I be returned to the pit, he must free me again. And I must say, he did a very fine job."

Lucifer stretched his arms luxuriously. "Of course, this body will eventually give out, and I'll have to find a new one. Unless you just want to say yes right now, and save us a lot of trouble?"

"No," Sam growled, stepping away from him. "Never."

"You already did once, and you will again," the devil smirked. "But this time, big brother won't be there to save you. You know why? Because pretty soon, your beloved Dean is going to be so far gone you won't even recognize him."

"You're wrong," Sam said. "Dean will fight the Blade and the Mark, and he'll win."

Lucifer laughed. "You're lying to _yourself_, Sam! You and I both know Dean's going to lose. He'll start out just killing monsters and demons. At one point, he'll slip up and kill his pet demon, Crowley, but that'll be excusable. Next it'll be angels, and not just the bad ones. He'll kill precious Castiel, and he'll enjoy it. And then he'll rip pretty little Juliet's heart out."

"He would never do any of that," Sam snarled. "Nothing could ever make him do that."

"You know that's a lie, Sam. And you know how it's going to end, too." The devil stepped closer to Sam, and he had nowhere to go. "One day, you're going to turn around and see big brother with black eyes. And then he's going to kill you too, Sam. Unless you say yes to me. Then nothing could ever hurt you again."

"Get away from me," Sam growled. "Dean's never going to do any of that, and I'm never going to say yes!"

"We'll see about that," Lucifer snarled, and then he pulled a long, curved blade off of his belt and stabbed it into Sam's shoulder.

Sam roared in pain. Trying and failing to ignore the agonizing pain in his left shoulder, he swung his fist and it collided with Lucifer's head. But the devil just straightened up, pulled his knife out, and struck Sam hard across the face. Sam stumbled, and then a boot collided with his back, sending him sprawling onto the ground.

Lucifer knelt down in front of him and lifted his chin with the bloody tip of his blade. "Let's try that again," he sighed. "Now, Sam, will you allow me to possess you and control you so that I can take over the earth and whatever else I could possibly want?"

"No," Sam said through gritted teeth.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Come on, Sam. I mean, yes, I've been dying to take you apart again, see what new ways there are to make you scream, but wouldn't it be easier just to say yes now? For both of us?"

"No," Sam said again. "All I'm ever going to say is no."

Lucifer forced him onto his back and jabbed his thumb into the stab wound in Sam's shoulder. Sam screamed through gritted teeth, and Lucifer chuckled. "I see that still hurts. What about fire, huh?" He slipped his hand into his pocket and pulled out a small flamethrower. "Does it still hurt when I melt the flesh off your bones? Why don't we give it a shot?"

"Get away from him!" a woman cried in anger and horror.

Lucifer looked up and saw Julie standing there, her gun pointed at him, but her eyes on Sam. stood up and brushed the dirt off his hands. "And here she is now, the lovely Juliet," he smirked. He glanced down at Sam, who was staring up at him with pain in his eyes. "We'll finish this later, Sam."

With no warning, he suddenly kicked Sam so hard in the head that the man went unconscious. Julie cocked her gun and pointed it at the heart of this sadistic man. She had no idea who he was, but the way he had been torturing Sam was more than enough reason for her to blow him away. But before she could fire, the man suddenly vanished.

Julie looked around, but there was no sign of him anywhere. Julie rushed to Sam's side and checked on his condition. He was bleeding pretty heavily from a deep stab wound in his shoulder, and Julie carefully peeled his suit jacket off of him to get a better look at it.

She pulled off her own jacket and used it to put pressure on the wound, hoping to stop the bleeding. Even unconscious, Sam looked slightly pained, and Julie was beginning to really worry about him when she heard footsteps.

She looked up and sighed in relief when she saw that it was just Dean. "Dean!" she cried. "Quick, get over here! We need to get Sam out of here so I can actually do something to stop the bleeding."

Dean didn't rush over to her side like she expected, but casually strolled over to them. He studied his brother on the ground, and then shrugged. "I don't know, looks okay to me. I think he'll survive."

Julie stopped fretting over Sam to stare up at Dean. "What?" she snapped. "Dean, what's wrong with you? Sam's _hurt_!"

"Oh, he's fine," Dean sighed dramatically. "I'll deal with him soon enough. But right now, I need to take care of you."

He advanced towards Julie as she straightened up, and she found herself backing away, really and truly scared. There was something wrong with Dean. He was…_different _somehow. His eyes were colder, and the corners of his mouth were turned up in a cruel sort of smile.

"Where are you going, Julie?" he laughed. "You can't escape here. You can't escape _me_."

"You're not Dean," Julie finally got out, glaring at whatever this was in front of her.

"Give the lady a prize," he smirked. "No, I'm not your boyfriend. But I'm even _better. _I'm what he's really like on the inside. I'm what Dean is going to _become._"

Julie found the knife tucked into her waistband and gripped it tightly. "No, you're not," she growled at the monster circling her. "You're just some pathetic monster who has no idea what he's up against."

Dean, or rather the monster posing as him, cocked his head and grinned a smug sort of grin that was very Dean-like. It was the one Dean wore when he knew he had the winning hand in a poker game, or the smug smirk he gave a despicable monster before he killed them.

"I don't, do I?" he smirked. "Let's see. Juliet Carters, an only child to two parents, both killed by vampires. You've been to hell and back, and you are quite the hunter. You love the Beatles, for some reason you get turned on when it's raining, your best friend in the world is lying there bleeding at your feet…need I say more?"

"How do you know all that?" Julie growled.

"I told you," Not-Dean smirked. He spread his arms wide so she could take in his tall, muscular body, which still looked so damn good in a suit. "I'm Dean Winchester. And another thing I know about you? You are desperately in love with me."

"Not. You," Julie spit through gritted teeth. "You are _not_ him."

"Not the Dean of _today_, you mean," he said, stuffing his hand in his pockets. He was still circling her slowly, like a lion stalking its prey, but there was something so familiar and truly Dean about even the way he walked, that she was finding it hard to convince herself this wasn't really the man she loved. "I'm Dean a few weeks, _maybe _months from now. Your Dean, the _old _me…he's as desperate and delusional as you, sweetheart. He really believes things can get better, that he can control the Mark of the Cain and the First Blade. I really believed that. But time passed, and the Mark got stronger, and for all my bravado, I couldn't fight it. Suddenly, your love wasn't enough anymore, and even Sam couldn't convince me that it was worth it to fight. So one day, I just quit. And now…" He gestured grandly to himself. "I'm me."

"You're not real," Julie said quietly, trying to convince herself.

"There's something nice about this new me," this monstrous version of Dean continued as if she hadn't spoken. "Life is simpler now. I don't have to carry all that guilt and pain I did before. I'm free now. I'm happy now. Isn't that what you wanted for me, anyway? If you really loved me, you would want me to be happy, right?" His smile was syrupy sweet, and his eyes were mocking her. Julie found herself irrationally terrified, staring at this twisted shadow of what had once been her Dean. This was her worst nightmare, come to life.

As Julie had backed away from this monstrous Dean, she had ended up a couple feet away from Sam. All of the sudden, he groaned slightly and his eyes fluttered open. Julie wanted to run to Sam, but Dean, or whatever else this was, was closer to him than she was.

Sam's eyes landed on this version of Dean, and for a second, Julie could swear she saw that same attractive, sandy-haired man who had tortured Sam. Then the monster was back to Dean, and his face was twisted into an angry snarl. Before Julie could stop him, Dean stalked over to Sam and kicked him in the head, hard, knocking him out again.

"Stay down, Sammy," he growled. "This isn't your nightmare."

"That's it," Julie gasped suddenly, and Not-Dean looked up to glare at her. "That's what you are. You're some kind of shifter, one that turns into people's worst nightmares. For Johnny, you were a doctor, because he's terrified of needles. And for Sam, you would have been…" Her eyes widened. "Lucifer." For surely nothing could be worse to Sam than the devil himself, who had spent an unimaginable amount of time torturing Sam, after possessing him and forcing him to kill Bobby Singer, Castiel, and nearly kill Dean. After that, a dark version of Dean didn't seem so bad.

But as this Dean just grinned and slowly circled closer to her, it was hard to imagine anything worse than this. She would have expected that Asmodeus or Beelzebub be her worst nightmare after everything they'd done to her, but this was somehow worse.

"What does it matter?" he said. "So, this hasn't happened to me yet. But it will, and we both know it. And you know what? I'll be happier. I won't have to take care of my pain-in-the-ass baby brother anymore." Julie had heard Dean call Sam that before, but it had always been said with such affection, and now it was said with contempt. "And I won't have to take care of you, the hopelessly-in-love, desperate, pathetic _bitch_." Julie flinched as he spat the word at her. Dean had never called her bitch. Never.

Dean's eyes were cold as he moved dangerously close to her. "You and Sammy? You were just holding me back, tying me to my old mistakes. I'm a new man without you two and that baggage. I'm a better man."

"You're not real," Julie whispered. She tried to sound defiant, but her voice shook. This was far too real…

Suddenly, Dean lashed out and hit her across the face. Julie clutched her stinging cheek and stared up at him in horror and surprise. "I don't know," he chuckled. "That felt pretty real to me."

Julie raised her knife to stab this thing, because it just _couldn't _be Dean. But he raised his own knife, thankfully not the First Blade, and blocked her first strike easily. Julie tried to kick his legs out from underneath him, but he easily side-stepped and got a good punch in the jaw in while her guard was down.

Julie stumbled back and then tried to straighten up to fight. But this monster was just as strong and fast as Dean, and he had already reached her. His blade flicked out and sliced her right arm open. It wasn't a deep cut, but it hurt like hell, and Julie dropped her knife.

The next second, Dean grabbed her left arm and twisted it at a horrible angle. There was a pop in Julie's shoulder, and then she screamed in pain as her left shoulder was dislocated.

For a second, she thought she heard Dean's voice from far away, crying her name. But then it came right in her ear. "I bet that felt real, too."

He threw her to the ground and Julie lay on her stomach for a moment, not caring about the fact that her face was pressed into the dirt ground, or that her blood was dripping onto her once nice white shirt. She was shaking, and not just in pain, but also in fear of this monster that was once the man she loved. Because this could so easily be Dean, if he was not somehow saved.

Dean knelt down and forced Julie to roll onto her back. He straddled her, and she found herself staring up at the monster. This was definitely not the first time they had been in this position, but it was definitely the first time he was holding a knife. He ran the tip of his knife teasingly along her cheekbone and then her jaw as he spoke.

"You want to know something else, Julie? It took some perspective, but I've finally realized the truth about how I _really _felt about you." His hands slipped lower and he undid a couple buttons of her shirt. Julie tried to throw the monster off, but he was every bit as strong and heavy as Dean, and she knew she had no hope of ever beating him. Not-Dean traced his knife down her neck to her heaving chest as he continued to speak.

"Well, it's like this. I mean, you're pretty and all, and you're pretty good in bed, I'll give you that, and you were _there _and all…but there was nothing special about you." Julie hated to admit it, but those words really stung. This monstrous Dean smirked slightly at the pain in her eyes. "I'm sure you were so proud of yourself, the woman who finally conquered Dean Winchester. But do you want to know the real truth? You were just a distraction, a good ally to have, and you made me feel pretty good about myself, seeing how desperately in love with me you were. But, Julie, sweetheart…I never really loved you. Sorry, but it's true. I'm not sure I've ever really loved any woman. There was Lisa Braeden, she was pretty good, definitely better than you. Second place isn't too shabby, though." Dean was grinning, and Julie could feel tears welling up in her eyes despite herself.

"You're lying," she said in a hoarse whisper. "This isn't Dean talking."

"No?" he smirked. "Come on, Julie. You know it's true. You were never going to be enough for me, the great Dean Winchester. I'm a legend, and you're a pathetic, lovesick bitch."

"Don't you say that to me, Dean," she whispered, blinking back tears.

Dean laughed cruelly. "I don't need you now, and I never needed you. You've served your purpose, Juliet. Now die with at least _some _self-respect." He moved his blade to rest over her heart. "I have to admit, I'm going to enjoy this. And you can watch me kill you, see what you turned me into. Because you and I both know, if I hadn't needed to take up the First Blade again to save your sorry ass, I wouldn't have become…_this_!"

And his green eyes flashed pure black.

Dean pulled his knife back to drive into her heart, and a single tear trickled down her cheek.

"_Hey_!" Dean growled, but not the one about to stab her. That monstrous Dean looked up and grinned. He stood up and walked away from Julie, forgetting her as a much more interesting victim appeared.

The real Dean stood over his fallen brother, pointing his gun at this monstrous version of himself. And despite himself, Dean's arms were trembling slightly.

"Interesting," Not-Dean smirked, slowly approaching the real Dean. "I'm not changing. That means that your worst nightmare, Dean Winchester, is me. Or rather, _you_."

Dean glared with green eyes at the black-eyed version of himself. That monster smiled wider. "Funny, because there are so many other things that I would think would scare you. Perhaps Alastair, the demon who tortured you for decades in hell?"

And suddenly the other Dean was another man with black eyes. From Julie's position on the ground, she couldn't get a good look at him, but she did see the unmistakable fear in Dean's eyes as he recognized this demon.

"Or perhaps Sammy gone dark side?" Alastair guessed, and the next second he was Dean's little brother with eyes black as night, demon blood smeared around his mouth.

"But no, not this one either," Sam sighed. Then his expression went even more malicious. "Ooh! I know. How about…Daddy?"

The monster suddenly took on the form of John Winchester, complete with dark, angry eyes and his mouth turned down in a disapproving frown. "You're pathetic, Dean," he spat, and Dean flinched. "You're a weak, disgusting excuse for a human, and you don't deserve to be my son."

There was a lot of pain in Dean's eyes, even as the monster shifted back into the twisted version of himself. Not-Dean laughed. "Damn, Dean. You're a mess. Or rather, _we_ are. You've got so much to be afraid of, and yet your worst fear is _yourself_?! Well, makes sense, I guess. You've known your whole life this is how your story was going to end. You'll kill Crowley and your beloved angel, and then you'll kill this pathetic bitch, and then you'll kill Sammy. After that, then you'll finally be what you always knew you were destined to be: me."

Dean stared at the monster in front of him, stared at himself, and there was true fear in his eyes. "You fight this so hard, Dean," the monster sighed. "You've been fighting your whole life, but all you do is mess up. Trust me, it's a lot easier just to give in. Here, I've got an idea. I'll get you your Blade, and you can kill Juliet and Sammy boy here, and then I'll help you. It'll all go away, Dean. You don't have to suffer anymore. You can-"

But Dean would never know what he could do, because a gunshot went off and the monster fell to the ground, a silver bullet through its heart.

Dean found himself staring at Julie. She had hauled herself to an upright position, even with her bleeding arm and dislocated shoulder, and she had shot the monster with a silver bullet. It must have been some kind of shifter, or at least an offshoot of the species, because the silver bullet had effectively killed it.

Dean stared at Julie, and she stared back at him, both of them wide-eyed and breathing heavily. Neither of them could think of a single thing to say. They had both just faced their worst nightmare, and it was the same thing.

Dean. Granted, it was Dean gone full-demon, but…it was _Dean_. That thing had walked and talked like Dean, and even if he wasn't real, it had _felt_ real.

Sam stirred slightly, groggily opening his eyes. He stared up at Dean, confused, and then a little scared. "You're not going to kick me again, are you?" he muttered, and Dean frowned, confused.

Julie tried to get to her feet, but she staggered a little to the side. Dean rushed forward and caught her waist, afraid to grab her arms, since both were hurt. He helped her stand, but then he looked away, unable to meet her eyes after what they had just seen.

Without speaking, the two of them went to Sam's side, and Dean helped his little brother sit up. He pressed Julie's suit jacket to the stab wound again, slowing the bleeding. "We need to get you out of here and patch you up," Dean said. "Julie too."

"What happened?" Sam asked, confused, as Dean helped him get to his feet. "I was…there wasn't any woman, and then…Lucifer…"

"Lucifer?!" Dean cried. "He was _here_?"

"Not really," Julie said quietly. "That thing was some kind of shape shifter. Except it was psychic or something, because it could read your mind, see your worst nightmare, and become it."

Sam nodded shakily. "Good. As long as that bastard stays in the pit, there's at least a small chance of us actually surviving this mess."

Then Sam frowned again. "But then, when I woke up again, Dean kicked me and knocked me out. Why would you do that?"

"I didn't," Dean said quietly, staring at the ground.

"Then what…?" Sam stopped, realizing what must have happened.

"That was my nightmare," Julie admitted softly. "Dean as a demon, basically."

"Oh." Sam swallowed. There was a long, tense silence, and then he finally spoke. "Well, we'd better get out of here then. You did find the kid, I'm assuming?"

"Yeah, he's safe," Dean said. "At least one thing went right today."

Dean led them out of the maze, and as Julie walked behind him, watching him, she tried to convince herself that monster had been just that: a monster. Not Dean. There was no way Dean would ever turn into that _thing_.

…Right?

* * *

><p>"So…Lucifer, huh?" Julie asked carefully, trying to distract Sam as she patched up his wound. She had already made him strip down to a white undershirt, given him painkillers, spread disinfectant on the nasty wound, and now she was trying to distract him as she stitched the hole shut as best she could with nothing more than a first aid kit to work with.<p>

Sam gritted his teeth, and not just because of the pain. He shifted to a different part of the hood of the Impala, uncomfortable with the topic. "You don't have to talk about it," Julie said quickly, sensing how tense and painful a subject it was.

"No, I…it would probably be good if you knew what happened," Sam admitted. "And it might actually help me to talk about it. I don't think anybody knows what happened besides Cas, and that's because he took the memories from me to save me."

"Not even Dean?" she asked, confused.

Sam's eyes met hers. "I'm his little brother, the one he's spent his whole life trying to protect. Do you really think telling him how Lucifer tortured me in the pit and drove me insane is really going to be good for him?"

Julie bit her lip. "Right. Wow. God, Sam, I'm so…" She stopped and sighed, knowing that there was nothing she could say to make what happened go away.

Julie regretted picking this subject, because now she was more focused on what Sam was saying than the gaping hole in his flesh. "Dean said you used to have hallucinations?" she asked, going back to her work.

"Yeah," Sam sighed. "It drove me crazy. Literally. He was always there, even when I was with Dean. It was easier then, when I had him to help remind me what was real, but…it was still bad."

"Did he…?" Julie started, and then stopped.

"Torture me?" Sam asked drily. His shoulder tensed up under her touch and she stopped, waiting until he relaxed slightly to continue stitching him up. After a moment, Sam took a deep breath and relaxed enough for her to go back to work. "Yeah. Not that often. Usually just when Dean wasn't there and I was alone. It was never quite as bad as when he was actually there, though."

Julie stopped probing him. She really did _not _want to know what her friend had suffered through in that pit. Sure, she had been at the mercy of hell's two greatest torturers, but they were only apprentices to the true master, who had Sam at his mercy for much longer than she was down in hell.

"So…Dean, huh?" Sam asked her after a long moment.

Julie had to stop, even though she was almost done, because her hand was trembling. "Yeah," she said softly after a long time, getting her emotions under control. "Dean."

Sam hesitated. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No."

"Okay."

A few seconds later, Julie turned back to the first aid kit and pulled out a sterile white bandage. She wrapped Sam's shoulder in it and stepped back. "There. You're all done."

Sam hopped off the Impala and patted the hood. "Alright. Your turn."

Julie raised her eyebrows. "You're not exactly a trained medical professional," she pointed out.

"No, but I'm sure I've got more experience than half of them," he shot back.

Julie hopped up on the Impala. Sam had helped her reset her shoulder before they had even left the maze. They had gotten away from the crowd of cops as quickly as they could, after making sure Johnny Wolfe was alright, and Dean drove them to the nearest gas station. He was inside buying some supplies as Sam and Julie patched each other up.

The bleeding from the cut on Julie's arm wasn't serious enough that she had been too worried about it. Still, Sam insisted on disinfecting it and wrapping it in a bandage. He finished in a couple of minutes, and Julie thanked him.

With no warning, Sam suddenly pulled Julie in for a hug. She didn't hesitate to hug him back, although she had to do it gingerly, because both of her arms were hurt. "It'll be okay, Julie," Sam muttered into her hair. "He'll be okay."

Julie nodded about a dozen times, trying to blink away the tears that were welling up in her eyes. Sam was right. Of course he was. He'd known Dean literally all of his life, watched Dean grow and change and suffer for almost thirty-three years. Sam knew Dean better than anyone, and if he said Dean would be okay, he would be. Sam and Julie would make sure of it.

"Ready to go?" Dean asked. They pulled apart and turned to see him standing nearby. Maybe it was just the dim lighting of a gas station parking lot at midnight, but he looked almost sickly pale. He was holding a coffee in his right hand, and Julie could swear it was sloshing around because of his trembling hand.

For a second, Julie could swear he was about to collapse. He looked weak, sick to the point that it bordered on dangerously unhealthy. Deadly.

Then he forced a grim smile and said, "Don't worry, this is just coffee. No alcohol. As the only non-wounded person here, I am unfortunately the designated driver."

"That's probably best," Sam admitted, wincing as he tried to move his injured shoulder.

The three hunters piled into the Impala, Sam and Dean in the front, and Julie in the backseat. They rode in an exhausted silence, and Julie was having a hard time keeping her eyes open.

Unfortunately, so was Dean.

It wasn't even a thirty minute drive to the motel they had reserved for the night, but Dean's body didn't seem to care. For weeks, his body had been giving out. He had been trying to ignore it, but he needed to kill to survive. And now, after the amount of strength it had taken to run around that maze and to face his worst nightmare…Dean was falling apart.

It came suddenly, and without warning. If Dean had felt it coming, he would have pulled the Impala over and stopped on the side of the ride. The two people he loved most in the world were sitting in the car with him!

But there was no warning. Suddenly, something in Dean decided to just quit working, and against his will, Dean's eyes suddenly rolled back into his head and he collapsed, falling forward onto the wheel.

Sam had been drifting off, but he woke up just in time to hear Julie scream as the Impala careened off the road and straight into a tree.


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter Thirty**

Julie woke up first, and immediately regretted it.

Everything hurt. Her head was throbbing, and there was a large bump on her forehead from where it had collided with the back of Sam's seat. The inside of her mouth tasted metallic, and when she coughed, she spat up blood.

She started to notice other injuries. Her dislocated shoulder was back, the impact having knocked it out of place. That pain was bad enough, and when you paired it with her awful, splitting headache and the large gash across her cheek and the several smaller cuts on her arm from broken glass, she had a hard time staying conscious.

The car was a mess. The windshield was shattered, and bits of bloody, broken glass were littered across the seats and floor of the car. There were a couple tree branches poking through the gaping hole in the front of the car, and the front of Dean's Baby had crumpled around the trunk of the sturdy oak. The airbags were out in the front seats, so it was difficult for Julie to tell through her spotty vision how bad Sam and Dean were, but she knew they needed a hospital as badly as she did, if not more.

Julie had done few tasks in her life more difficult than this attempt at dialing nine-one-one. Every movement was painful, and she could barely move her right arm due to the many cuts and bruises on it. Her left arm was immobile. Still, by some small miracle, she managed to fish her phone out, which thankfully was still working, and she dialed the emergency hotline.

She put the call on speaker and waited, trying to keep her breathing steady, as the phone rang, once, twice, three times. Her vision was a bit spotty, and she knew she didn't have long before the pain overwhelmed her.

Halfway through the fourth ring, a man picked up the phone. "Hello?" he asked.

Julie tried to speak, but instead started coughing and choking on her blood again.

"Hello? Is someone there? Are you alright? Can you breathe?" The man sounded too panicked to have been doing this long. Great. She got a newbie.

"I've been in a wreck," Julie finally got out in a hoarse voice so weak she was a little surprised he heard her.

"Are you alright, ma'am? Are there any other passengers?"

"My…my husband and his brother." Once they got to the hospital, she'd be grateful for that little lie, because family got privileges that just plain girlfriends didn't. "They're unconscious, and they've sustained pretty serious injuries. I can't…I can't get a good look at them, but my guess is…they're worse than me."

"How severe are your injuries, ma'am?"

"Pretty serious head wound, possible concussion…dislocated shoulder… bleeding in several places…possibly internally." She tried to take a deep breath, and it hurt. "Possible bruised ribs, maybe even broken."

"Those are some pretty serious injuries, ma'am," the man said nervously. "Usually you're diagnosed by a medical professional. Are you sure-?"

"Yes!" she snapped. The pain was threatening to overwhelm her. She quickly told him the name of the interstate they were on, and he promised to have help there in ten minutes or sooner.

She hung up and sat with her cheek resting on the back of Sam's seat, which was wet with her own blood. With the last of her energy, she moved forward slightly and reached out to find Dean's arm in the mess of deflated airbag and broken glass and jumbled limbs that was the front seat of his beloved Impala.

Julie finally found Dean's right arm and she felt around for his wrist, trying to ignore the way she was getting her hand wet with his blood.

With the very last bit of strength in her, Julie found his wrist and she held it for a moment. Slow horror filled her, even as she began to slip back into unconsciousness.

Perhaps it was because she was fading out of consciousness. She hoped it was because she was fading out of consciousness. But Julie could not feel any pulse in Dean at all.

* * *

><p>"My lord, your three o'clock is here," the gorgeous black woman standing in the doorway announced.<p>

Beelzebub smirked slightly. His sister, despite her many flaws, was quite entertaining, if nothing else. She got bored easily, and after playing around with her new sexy body and seeing how many men she could get to sell their souls for a night with her, she would move on to the next poor, gorgeous woman she could find. Apollyon was going through a punk phase, and today she was riding a tall, curvy, athletic black woman with choppy, short hair and a diamond stud in her nose.

"What is my three o'clock again, Polly?" Beelzebub asked her, using a toothpick to pick the olives out of his martini. He too was experimenting, with the many different ways humans drank alcohol now.

"That would be the demon, Crowley," she sighed, shooting the dark-haired, bearded man a cold look as he sauntered into the room.

Beelzebub had to admit, the demon had style. Very few demons, especially ones that he had threatened to kill, would have the nerve to stroll so casually into hell's throne room. Granted, this had once been Crowley's throne room, but there was no hint or anger of jealousy on his calm face as the demon approached Beelzebub's throne.

"My lord," Crowley said, bowing his head slightly.

Beelzebub smirked. "Wow. It must really be hard for you to be saying that instead of hearing it, and here of all places!" He gestured to the grand room that had once been Crowley's.

The demon shrugged. "If all goes according to plan, I'll get it back soon enough. Anyway, doesn't matter how I feel. I'm not stupid enough to challenge you."

"And that is why I let you live!" the king of the Knights of Hell smirked. In the back of the room, Apollyon rolled her eyes.

"Now, what news have you of the Winchesters and Juliet?" Beelzebub asked, sitting forward in his chair eagerly.

"They're trying to keep me out of the loop, which is a wise move by them, but I've got some leads," Crowley admitted. "Dean Winchester isn't using the Blade at all. He's hoping if he goes cold turkey he won't go dark."

"Fool," Apollyon smirked. "Nothing can save him now!"

Beelzebub shot her a look. "_My_ throne room. _I_ talk. Am I clear?"

She rolled her eyes, but didn't dare speak again.

"Anyway, what she said," Beelzebub sighed. "That might slow things down a bit, though. How can we speed them up?"

"Well, a week ago, your siren found them," Crowley said. "She put Dean under, and he nearly killed his girlfriend, but Sam killed the siren before Dean killed her in his typical heroic way."

Beelzebub sighed. "Yes, Cynthia failed me, what else is new. What about that strange new shifter I found? Have they discovered him yet?"

"Oh, that toy? They found him yesterday," Crowley smirked.

"And?"

"Well, they all survived. Juliet and Sam were wounded, but the girl managed to take out the shifter."

"That's my girl," Beelzebub chuckled. "Tough as nails, that one, and pretty as a picture. I do rather miss having her around. Once we get Dean under control, then we can worry about getting her back, and Sam as well. I'd love to see how long it will take me to break that one."

Crowley looked down for a second until he could get his face back into that carefully calm, controlled expression he kept around the Knights of Hell, and forced himself not to imagine the Winchesters and that girl at the hands of this demon. If he could just get through this meeting…

"I do have one other lead, though," Crowley said. "It appears Dean is deteriorating very rapidly now that he's no longer killing with the Blade. Soon, he'll be in danger for his life. I think I should be able to persuade his brother and girlfriend to help convince him to start killing again, once they see how much trouble he's in. And they won't suspect a thing."

"I have to admit, you're really beginning to grow on me, Crowley," Beelzebub said after a moment. "Go. Do what you have to. And don't even think of betraying me. I think we both know how that will end."

Crowley turned and walked out, pausing to smirk at Apollyon. She bared her teeth and hissed at him, and he just smirked wider as he walked past her. She could act tough, but there was nothing she could do to him as long as he was on Beelzebub's good side.

He had better find a way to stay there, though.

* * *

><p>"<em>Dean? Dean, honey, can you hear me?"<em>

"_I don't think he can, Julie."_

"_The doctors said he should be better by now, Sam!"_

"_What do they know? They think he's got cancer or something. They can't figure out why his body's just…quit."_

"_Well, cancer makes more sense than the Mark of Cain and the First Blade demanding that he kill or die, doesn't it?"_

"…_Julie…"_

"_He'll be okay. Won't he? He'll be okay. We'll find a way to make him okay."_

"_We can try."_

"_Sam-"_

"_No, you're right. We _will."

"…_Should we call Cas?"_

"_Yes. No. I don't know, maybe. He's got his own problems to worry about, but… he'd want to be here."_

"_I know."_

"…_Hey, Julie, it's okay. He'll be okay. I promise. Dean's gotten through worse than this. He'll be okay. Promise."_

* * *

><p>"<em>Dean? I, uh…can you hear me?...Of course, even if you <em>could _hear me, you couldn't talk. Anyway, uh…man, I feel stupid. Could you at least like twitch if you can hear me? Isn't that what they do in movies or whatever?_

"…_Okay. So you didn't twitch. Not sure if that means you really can't hear me of if that twitching stuff is bullshit. Well, I'm just going to keep talking anyway, on the small chance that you actually are listening. So, the doctors say you should be fine. Your arm isn't too bad. It's just sprained and not broken, which is a small miracle in itself. Only bruised ribs, no broken ones, which was another big surprise. You suffered some head trauma and blood loss, but still, you're not anywhere near as messed up as you could be. And then there's the whole issue of your organs failing, but…that's not much to do with the car crash…_

"_Look, Dean, I'm sorry. I should have seen what was happening to you. I shouldn't have let you drive. I should have made you keep the Blade, made you kill that shifter or whatever that was so this wouldn't be happening. If you never wake up again, it'll be on me…_

"_Dammit, I told myself I was not going to cry. I'm a mess, Dean. What am I even supposed to do without my bitchy big brother to boss me around? Julie and I…we're losing it. She's okay, physically at least. Just sits in here all the time, watching you and crying…the doctors don't have the heart to tell her you're probably not going to wake up…_

"_Great, and I'm crying again. Dammit. _Dammit!_ Dean, just _wake up_, dammit! We need you! I _need _you! Please, Dean, it can't end like this…you're my brother…I can't lose you…"_

* * *

><p>Dean opened his eyes and blinked several times. Sunlight wafted into the hospital room through cheery white blinds, making the clean, harshly white surfaces a bit softer.<p>

Dean tried to shift into a sitting position, and realized he was wearing only a hospital gown. Great. That was totally not humiliating. He tried to lift his hand to his face, and found that there was an IV tapped into his wrist, limiting his range of movement.

He glanced around his hospital room and softened. One of the stiff hospital chairs was pulled as close to his bed as it could be, and Julie was sitting in it, her arms resting on the edge of the bed, her head buried in her arms. Her face was turned to the side, and Dean studied the soft curves of her face, her long, dark lashes, the thin cut along her cheek. He lifted his free hand and gently brushed a couple curls out of her face, but she didn't stir.

"She won't wake up," a familiar voice said, and Dean practically jumped out of the hospital bed.

"The hell are _you _doing here?!" he cried as he looked up to see a familiar, pale, odd-looking man in a dark suit.

"You're sitting in a hospital. The last thing you remember was your body giving out on you and you crashing your car into a tree. What do you think I'm doing here?"

"No," Dean slowly. "I can't…I'm not…I'm not dead."

"Not yet," Death admitted, using his cane to tap on one of the machines hooked up to Dean. "These are making sure of that."

"Then I repeat my earlier question: the hell are _you _doing here?!"

Death himself shook his head, smiling slightly. "I have to admit, Dean Winchester, I have rather missed coming to collect you. It's been a whole six months, give or take, since the last time you died, I believe. I was beginning to wonder if you were actually going to live a normal life and quit dying so often."

"Like that would ever happen," Dean muttered. "Okay, so I get it. You're here for old time's sake. You want to say goodbye to me before you have to take me downstairs, is that it?"

Death studied him for a long moment. "So odd," the Horseman said suddenly. "In all of my time collecting souls, very few people have actually believed they deserved hell, especially when they knew exactly what it entailed. It's quite impressive how low your opinion of yourself is, especially when you've got people like her so desperate to prove you wrong."

Death approached Julie's sleeping form, and Dean tensed up seeing him so close. Dean knew this being could kill the woman he loved with just a touch, so when the Horseman brushed his cold, pale, wrinkled hand across her head, it took all Dean had not to lunge at Death and try to fight him, even though he knew he would lose terribly.

"Juliet Carters," Death sighed, studying her sleeping face. Dean gritted his teeth. Surely Death would not take Julie's life for no reason. He had no grudge against her, and he wouldn't take her unless it was her time. But he still couldn't relax until that powerful, extremely deadly being stepped away from the woman he loved.

"I really regretted taking her, as much as I can regret doing my job," Death sighed. "She was very good. And not just to you, but to everyone. She was a good person, and I usually regret taking them. I regret taking newborn babes from mothers. I regret taking innocent little girls from loving fathers, or mothers from poor little boys." At this, his cold, dark eyes seemed to burn into Dean, and for a moment he was back at that horrific night thirty-two years ago, when his mother had burned on the ceiling and his life had gone to hell. Literally. Surely Death himself had been present to take Mary Winchester's soul, since her death was so important to the plans of both heaven and hell.

Dean pulled his thoughts away from the death of his mother to the death of the woman he loved. "Why did you take her, then? Why did you let that son of a bitch drag her to hell? She didn't deserve that! No one deserves that, but especially not her."

"I do my job, Dean Winchester," Death said coldly. "Do not ask me to bend the laws of nature for your pretty little girlfriend."

Dean glared at him. "Fine. You don't want to apologize for letting her die and go to hell, fine. Just tell me why you're here or get the hell out."

"You should be a lot more respectful to someone who could just take your life, as well as hers and Sam's as well," the Horseman warned him.

"You won't," Dean growled. "It's not following the 'laws of nature' or whatever that bullshit was."

"Technically, all three of you should not be walking this earth. It's not natural, and I've every right to put you back in the ground. But you're right, I won't take them. But I _should_ take you. In fact, you're due in a couple of days. But I'm bending the rules for you yet again, Dean Winchester. You're supposed to sit in that coma you've been in the past four days for two more, and then you'll give up entirely, and I'll come for you." Dean blinked, surprised and a little scared. "But I came here and woke you up, because this isn't really your time. Not quite. Soon, but not yet."

"What are you saying?" Dean asked slowly.

"I'm saying this isn't the path you're meant to take. It is another path you could take, should you choose. But I consider it only fair to give you all the options."

"Alright," Dean said, trying to look as tough as he could in nothing but a hospital gown. "Let's hear my options."

"One option would be to just give up now and die, and I'll take you to your final resting place," Death said gravely. "I won't tell you which place it is, since that's not playing by the rules, but I promise you've been there before."

Dean blinked. "Did you just make a joke? Did _Death_ just make a _joke _about the ridiculous amount of times I've died and how I've gone to both heaven and hell?!"

"Clearly I will be making no more jokes," Death sighed. "Your other option would be to take up the First Blade and begin killing again."

"What? No!" Dean cried, all amusement gone.

"Those are your only options," the Horseman told him. "You are dying because you refuse to kill with that First Blade. And this time there will be no quitting. Before, you were able to stop because there were no Knights of Hell on the earth. But now they roam free, and as long as they are out there, the Mark of Cain and the First Blade will demand you kill them or be killed."

"But…you know what it will do to me," Dean whispered, not even bothering to hide his fear from Death. Death knew him a lot better than many of the people he had called friends, actually, and had seen Dean at his weakest points. He had nothing to hide from the Horseman.

"I cannot change the choices you have made, Dean Winchester," Death said flatly. "You must live with them. And perhaps you will not succumb as quickly as you think. You are strong, Dean. Perhaps you can kill all of the Knights of Hell before the Mark of Cain and the First Blade make you into something as evil as any of them."

"And what if I can't?" Dean asked darkly.

"Perhaps Juliet or Sam will be strong enough to kill you," Death shrugged. "I highly doubt it. There is a chance that Castiel will have the strength and care enough about you to stop you, but he too has a soft spot for you. Your best bet is probably the demon Crowley. While he does have a soft spot for you as well, when worst comes to worst, he'll pull the trigger. He's not as weak as your other friends."

"Whoever said Crowley was my friend?" Dean muttered.

"We'll see soon enough, won't we, who his allegiances truly lie with," Death said, more to himself to Dean.

"What do you mean?" Dean asked, confused.

"No matter," Death said quickly. "You have other problems. I'm going to give you the next two days, Dean. Instead of being in a coma, you will be awake. You can talk to your brother and kiss your girlfriend and say goodbye to your friend Castiel, because in two days, I will still come for you. Unless you take up that Blade again and kill. Otherwise, I _will _have to take you with me."

"Sounds fair," Dean said, eying Julie's sleeping face. Two days left with her. Two days to somehow find all four remaining Knights of Hell and kill them. Two days to somehow say everything he needed to say to Sammy and Jules and Cas and even Crowley…there was no way he could do it.

"I hope you choose well, Dean," Death said coolly, and then he disappeared.

Julie's blue eyes suddenly flew wide open and she sat up, confused. She saw Dean, eyes open and alert, and she shrieked, before suddenly throwing her arms around Dean. He winced slightly and sucked in a pained breath through gritted teeth as she crushed him in a desperate hug. He patted her back with his good arm and whispered, "Jules, I'm still a bit sore…"

She released him and laughed nervously, wiping at her eyes. "God. Sorry. I just…I thought you were…"

She started to cry even more, wiping furiously at her eyes. With his good hand, Dean reached out and brushed a tear off her cheek, and Julie leaned into his hand.

"God, I thought you were going to die before I said I was sorry," she sobbed.

"What are you sorry for, honey?" Dean frowned.

"My nightmare," she choked out. "It wasn't you. You know that, right? I'm not scared of you, and I would never want you to think that. I just-"

"Shh, I know, it's okay," Dean said gently. He shifted over on the hospital bed and guided her up onto the bed so she could settle in next to him. She carefully found a way to curl up next to him without hurting him, and Dean stroked her hair as he spoke. "I know, Jules. It's okay. That was my nightmare, too, remember?"

Dean tried not to think about that dark version of himself. That shape shifter, or whatever it was, had assumed the form of so many things he feared. The demon, Alastair, one of the most feared demons and most skilled torturers in all of creation, who had taken Dean apart in a million different ways for thirty years on his rack, finding new ways to break Dean, to make him scream and cry and beg for death. There was no one Dean should fear more than him. Then Sam, his beloved little brother gone fully demonic. His father, disappointed and disgusted with him.

And yet none of those had scared Dean like looking at himself had, an evil, demonic version of himself.

"How's my baby?" Dean asked to distract himself.

Julie frowned slightly, confused. "Um…I'm okay. Better off than you definitely. Sam and I are both mostly recovered."

Dean laughed a little. "That's good," he said with a smirk. "Really, I'm glad you two are okay. But…I was actually talking about the car."

"Of course you were," she muttered, but she couldn't stay annoyed with him, as he brushed her hair away from her eyes so he could get a better look at her. Julie gave Dean an apologetic look. "Dean…I know this is going to be hard for you, but…she's _not_ doing so good. She got towed to a lot near here, and Sam and I made sure they won't trash her. Once you get better, you can fix her up."

Dean glanced down, silently apologizing to his beloved car. He wouldn't actually have the time to get better and fix her up because in two days, he would be…

"I should let Sam know you're here!" Julie cried suddenly, snapping Dean out of his dark thoughts. "He's been worried sick about you. I think he went to get Cas, since we didn't know if you'd…if you were going to get better. He wanted Cas to get to say goodbye."

"Cas has his own problems," Dean frowned. "He doesn't need to come here!"

"He'll want to," Julie said gently. "He'll want to see you."

Dean hesitated, but she was already calling Sam. She barely even had to say that Dean was awake before the phone went dead, and Dean was sure it would be mere seconds before Sam came running into the room.

Julie turned back to Dean and stared at him for a long time. "What? Do I look that bad?" he smirked.

"No, you look…" The corner of her mouth twitched up in a smirk, and she brushed a finger along one of the stitched up cuts on his forehead. He looked a lot better than the bloody mess they had cut out of the wrecked Impala four days ago. They had performed two surgeries on him, and he'd been on life support for four days, but none of the doctors could quite figure out what was wrong with him. He had a badly sprained arm, four bruised ribs, some serious head trauma and quite a bit of blood loss from his many cuts and bruises, but he should have woken up two days ago. There was just so much internal damage, though. His organs were failing, and the doctors had told her and Sam yesterday that Dean was probably never going to wake up.

Well, they were wrong. Dean was back, and soon he'd be as good as new, and they would get through this somehow. Julie would never have to lose him, at least not until they had lived long, happy, full lives.

Julie tucked her hair behind her ear so it wasn't in her way as she bent to kiss Dean. She had to be careful, because his lip was split open on one side, but it was healing quickly. Dean started to kiss her back, wrapping his good arm around her waist, but then he suddenly pulled away.

"What's wrong?" she asked, confused.

"Sorry, it's just, uh…well, maybe we can continue this another time when I have more clothes on?" he said carefully, smirking a little.

"Right, because I've never seen you naked before," she shot back.

"But I don't think Sammy has, at least not anytime recently, and Cas sure as hell better not have."

Julie turned in the hospital bed and saw Sam and Cas standing in the doorway. Sam was pale, like he was seeing a ghost, but he was grinning, too.

Julie quickly got up and let Sam rush to his brother's side. "You're okay!" the younger Winchester cried as he reached Dean.

"Miracles really do happen," Dean shrugged.

Cas smiled slightly. He hadn't quite had time to adjust to the fact that Dean was dying yet, because Sam had just called him not even ten minutes ago, and then suddenly he was alright again. But he was still relieved for his best friend, and for his two other friends who had been so worried about him these past four days.

"Thank you so much for being here, Cas," Julie said, approaching the angel.

"Of course," Castiel said gravely. "If Dean or any of you are ever in trouble, don't hesitate to call me. Please, I want to help."

"I know you do, Cas, but you've got your own problems to worry about," Julie pointed out.

"I think Dean has saved the angels enough times that they can hold off their fighting for a day to make sure that he's alright," the angel said.

Julie hugged her friend tightly, and he awkwardly hugged her back until he found that he actually was comfortable hugging this woman now. Dean gave him a grateful smile over her shoulder, and Cas nodded gravely at his friend.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Sam asked Dean nervously.

Dean thought for a second about telling these three people he cared so deeply about that he had forty-eight hours left to live, or go back to the Blade. But he found them staring at him so hopefully, still high on the relief of him no longer in a coma, that he found he just couldn't do that to them. Not yet.

The time came soon enough though. After a couple hours of catching up and planning, Cas and Julie stepped out to get a meal for the three humans who actually required food. Sam stayed to talk with his brother, and for a few minutes they joked and talked about normal things, or at least normal for hunters.

But Sam could tell there was something wrong with him. There was something heavy and resigned and awfully familiar about the way he talked and the sad smiles he gave Sam. The fond way he had teased Cas, or the way his eyes had lingered on Julie as if trying to burn her image into his memory forever…

Sam was reminded of those last few horrible days before Dean's year ran out and hellhounds dragged him to hell. Everything about Dean screamed of a man who knew his time was running out, and was oddly okay with it.

So when Dean finally told Sam that they needed to talk and told him about his conversation with Death, Sam wasn't nearly as surprised as he should have been.

"This…this is good though, isn't it?" Sam said after absorbing the information.

"What? Sammy, did you miss the part where your big brother's going to _die _in two days?" Dean cried. "I mean, I know I'm a pain in the ass sometimes, but I at least thought you'd _pretend _to be sad-"

"But you don't have to die, Dean!" Sam cried. "Death said it wasn't your time! He gave you another chance to live, and all we have to do is find a monster or demon for you to kill, get the Blade, and you're fine again!"

"Sam, are you missing the part about using the Blade?" Dean cried. "That's not an option!"

"Well, neither is you dying!" Sam snapped. "Besides, Death said you can fight it. We'll help you, and you'll overcome it and kill these sons of bitches and we'll find a cure…"

Sam stopped, because his older brother was laughing drily. Dean stopped when he saw the hurt and anger in Sam's eyes. "Look, Sammy…I'm sorry. I know this is hard for you. It's hard for me to have to leave you and Julie and Cas. I really don't want to die again, but that's our only choice here. You and I both know I'm not going to win. That Blade is going to take me over and it's going to turn me into that monster we saw in the maze, and I'd rather die than become that _thing-_"

"So, you won't!" Sam snapped. "Julie and I, we'll be there for you. Cas, too. Hell, I bet Crowley would help you, too. Jody, Jasper, even Taylor…I'll get ahold of Charlie and get her back from Oz if that'll help. We'll work together, we'll keep you human, Dean. We can do this, together."

Sam was begging him. He was trying to be confident, but he was really begging Dean to say that this could work, that they could help him.

"I wish we could, Sammy," Dean said gently, wishing more than anything that he didn't have to let his little brother down. Again. "But it's not about _us_. This fight is all me, and I'm not strong enough anymore. I take up that Blade again, and I'm going to lose."

"Well, with that mindset you are-"

"No, Sam. I'm going to lose. I can't fight any longer. I'm so tired, and I'm weak. I want to be strong, for you and Jules and Cas and everybody else who died to save my pathetic hide, but I can't do it anymore." Dean stared up at the ceiling until the tears passed, and then he choked out, "Sammy, just…just let me go. Don't make me do this. You make me use that Blade and I'll just turn into that_ thing_, and I can't do that."

"Dean…" Sam choked out, eyes shiny as well.

"I'm sorry, Sammy," Dean said softly. "I wish I was strong enough for this, but I'm not. I'll lose. Trust me, it's kinder just to let me die."

"I can't!"

"But you have to," Sam's big brother said, and he smiled weakly at him from his hospital bed. Sam closed his eyes, unable to look at the defeat and pain and guilt and somehow peace in his brother's expression. He was at peace with his death, even if Sam could never be.

"Just let me go, Sammy."


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter Thirty-One**

When Dean woke up the next morning, he felt weary. Exhausted. Every part of him felt heavy and impossible to lift, and he just wanted to sleep forever.

But he couldn't. Judging by that clock, he had about thirty hours left with his loved ones before his time ran out. He had to stay strong and awake, and make these last few hours count.

"Mr. Rivers?" Dean looked up to see a nurse standing nearby with a tray of food. It was a pitifully small amount, but Dean wanted to eat. He wanted to pretend things were normal, and that he wasn't a dead man walking once again. Or rather, a dead man lying in a hospital bed.

She set down the tray and asked him how he was doing. He quickly answered all the preliminary doctor questions, eying the green apple she had brought him hungrily.

"Do you need anything?" she asked him for the third time.

"I'm fine, really," he assured her.

The nurse's expression softened as she stared at something behind him. Dean turned around and saw Julie back in that uncomfortable hospital chair, asleep again. Her brow was furrowed even in sleep, and Dean knew Sam must have told her.

"Your wife sure loves you a lot," the nurse said kindly, and Dean was confused for a second before he remembered they were pretending to be married. Not too far a stretch for them, really.

"Yeah?" Dean said uncertainly. He had thought she would hate him after the decision he had made last night.

"She's spent the past five days in here, almost never leaving your side," she chuckled. "Kept telling the doctors how to best help you, seeing as she's a nurse. Really annoyed them, but…it was sweet."

Dean nodded gratefully at the kind nurse, and she smiled once again at him before leaving the room.

"She'd love you a lot more if you weren't so intent on killing yourself," Julie muttered, and Dean smirked. Of course she hadn't been sleeping. His girlfriend's eyes flew open and he found himself staring down icy blue eyes. He had forgotten how intimidating she could be, when she'd been so gentle and caring with him lately.

Dean sighed. "Listen, Julie-"

"No, _you_ listen, Dean!" Julie snapped. "Let's say it was me in that hospital bed. Let's say I was the one with the Mark, and _I _was the one who had to choose between the Blade and dying. And I told you I'd rather die. Would you let _me_?"

"That's different-"

"No, it's not-"

"Yes, it _is_, Julie!" Dean snapped suddenly, surprising Julie into silence. She saw the pain and guilt and grief in his eyes and stopped arguing to let him say what he needed to say. Then she could disagree with him.

Dean took a deep breath. "You're wonderful, Julie. You are. You're so good, even now after ten years of hell, and you wouldn't give into the Mark of Cain. At least not for a very long time. But I've been fighting this for a long time, Jules, and I'm not as good as you."

"Dean-"

"I'm _not_," he growled. "I'm a mess. All I do is let people down. And I'm tired of it. I'm tired of fighting, I'm tired of losing, and…" Dean swallowed, and his green eyes were shiny. He couldn't look at her as he admitted, "I'm scared, Jules."

"Anyone would be, Dean," Julie said gently, moving her chair closer to be near him. "Death is terrifying, even for you, who's died so many times it's not even funny." She reached out and put a hand on Dean's arm, trying to comfort him. "But you don't have to die-"

"No," Dean said, and she stopped again, surprised. But this time it wasn't by the ferocity of his voice, but by the gentleness of it. He put his hand over hers and said sadly, "That's not what I'm afraid of."

"Then what…?" She searched his eyes and found the answer.

"Julie, please. I need you to understand. I know you can understand more than Sam. I mean…you saw that thing…you saw _me-_"

"It wasn't you," Julie snapped. "Dean, that monster was just messing with you, and with me. That could never be you."

Dean looked down and shook his head. "It couldn't!" she insisted.

He looked up, and Julie saw absolute certainty in his green eyes as he spoke. "If I keep using that Blade that will be me. The only way that won't happen is if you or Sam or Cas or somebody puts me down. Can you look me in the eye and promise me that you could kill me if you had to?"

Julie stared at him for a long time. She tried to imagine this man in front of her, this brave, kind, tough, funny, wonderful man becoming a monster. If he became evil, could she really put a bullet through his brain? Could Sam, or Cas?

Dean felt his heart break as tears welled up in Julie's eyes. "No," she whispered. "I couldn't."

Dean did his best to pull her into an embrace, which was a bit awkward from his position on the hospital bed. Julie grabbed a fistful of his hospital gown (he really needed to get some actual clothing), and buried her face in his shoulder, one of the only parts of him that wasn't still healing. When he felt a sob shake her body, he had to blink back tears himself.

"It'll be okay," Dean told her, although he was lying through his teeth.

"What about the Knights?" Julie asked sharply after she had composed herself slightly. "What about Metatron? What are we supposed to do? We can't kill the Knights if you're dead, and then they'll eventually get their hands on Sam and Cas and I and torture and kill us. Are you really going to let that happen?"

"That's not fair," Dean snapped.

She looked down. "I know," she whispered. "I know it's not, but Dean…there's no way we're going to win without a way to kill them. And there's no way we can keep going without you!"

"Jules, I'm so sorry," he said, his heart breaking. How could he leave them, with so much work left to do? There was no way they could win! His little brother and girlfriend and best friend would all die, along with the entire planet. Who cared about his humanity? He had known this was going to happen all those weeks ago, when he took up the Blade again. He should have been ready for this.

But why did it have to be him? Why did he have to be the one to suffer and become a monster? He shouldn't have to!

Neither Dean nor Julie had anything left to say, so eventually Julie got up and left, making some excuse about talking to Sam. Dean watched her go feeling cold and empty. He had little over a day left, and the two people he loved most couldn't bear to even look at him. Soon, he'd never see them again, and they couldn't stand to be near him for what little time he had left.

Dean called for a nurse and asked if he could get some actual clothes. He was healing enough that they had taken him off the IV, and she said if he was very careful with his injuries, he could put on a fresh pair of jeans and a dark t-shirt that Julie had brought from the car for him, knowing he'd want actual clothes. The nurse, who was actually a really pretty, petite brunette, offered to help him change, but for one thing, that would be beyond humiliating, and then there was Julie. He was sure she would be pretty angry if she walked in on this pretty nurse dressing her boyfriend.

So Dean got dressed himself. It was quite a struggle, and took about four times longer than it should have, because every part of him ached. He was weak as well, and his muscles shook a little when he had to stand on his own. Death had given him the strength to make it two more days, but not an ounce more.

After Dean was back in normal clothes, he considered calling for Sam and Julie. Even if they fought, it was still better than not seeing them again for his last day. But just as he was about to attempt to call them, Cas appeared suddenly at the foot of his bed.

Dean jumped. "Dammit, Cas!" he snapped. "You have got to quit scaring me like that!"

Castiel gave him the smallest of smiles. And then he frowned. "I hear you plan to let Death take you in a little over twenty-four hours."

Great. Straight to the point. "Yes, that's the plan, Cas, and please don't try to change my mind."

"I know you better than to try that, Dean," the angel sighed, walking over to sit in the chair next to his bed. Dean turned in the bed so his feet were hanging off the side, and so he could face his old friend better. He was going to miss this angel a lot, once he was gone.

"You'll watch out for the two of them, won't you?" Dean asked nervously. "I know you've got the issue of Metatron, and I sure as hell wish I got to live to see that son of a bitch dead, but maybe you could let them help you…just so you've got help and you can make sure that the Knights don't get them."

Cas sighed and put his head in his hands. "What?" Dean asked, confused.

"You can't really expect us to just sit by and let you do this, Dean!" he snapped.

"That's exactly what I expect, and I'd appreciate it if I didn't have to argue with another person about this," Dean snapped.

"Fine," Cas said coldly. "But then you certainly can't expect Sam and Julie to keep fighting. You really think once you're dead, they'll be in any kind of shape to help me stop Metatron? They're not going to keep fighting if you refuse to yourself."

"They'll move on," Dean muttered, looking down. "They'll have to."

"You know as well as I do those two are never going to recover from this," Cas said sharply. "And in all honesty, I probably will not, either." Dean felt a wave of guilt and grief go through him, seeing how upset his friend was. Then a small bit of hope lit up Cas's eyes. "Perhaps I can reason with Death, convince him that you can't die yet, not with the Knights and Metatron still…"

He stopped talking when he met Dean's eyes and saw what he already knew reflected there. There was no point. Death would not waver, and neither would Dean.

"I'm sorry, Cas," Dean sighed after a long time. "I really am. But it's got to be this way."

"Dammit, Dean!" Cas growled suddenly, standing up. "How can you do this? You know you could keep fighting, but you're giving up! You've done a lot of things, Dean, but you don't give up."

Dean's gaze was steely and almost cold as he said, "Well, Cas, welcome to the new me. I'm not going to change my mind."

"Then there's no reason for me to still be here," the angel said coldly, and he vanished.

As soon as he was gone, Dean's cold composure broke and he put his head in his hands. Dammit! He'd lost all three of them over this! At least maybe this way, if they all hated him when he died, they wouldn't grieve nearly as much. Maybe they could move on. _Maybe_ they could survive.

But Dean really doubted it.

* * *

><p>Cas appeared next to the vending machine, where Sam and Julie waited in a tense silence. The angel resisted the urge to blow up the machine in front of him in his frustration and grief, and instead growled, "He's not changing his mind. Dean is set on dying."<p>

The two humans who loved Dean so sighed, what little fight was left in them going out. "I knew he wasn't going to change his mind," Sam muttered. "But I really hoped you two could get through to him when I couldn't."

"Sam, if you can't get through to Dean, then there's no one who can," Julie pointed out. "Still…it was worth a shot."

Julie looked so tired and defeated that Sam wanted to comfort her, but the only thing that could possible make her feel any better was if Dean somehow wasn't about to die. And it looked like that would never happen.

"So…what do we do now?" Sam asked uncertainly. "We can't just let Dean die!"

"Oh, don't worry about him," a fourth voice said calmly, and a familiar figure stepped forward out of nowhere and walked up to the vending machine. He calmly bought himself a soda and took a sip of it before frowning.

"Wow. I really can only tolerate beer," Crowley admitted before tossing the almost entirely full can into the trash.

"What are _you _doing here?" Castiel asked suspiciously, fingering the angel blade tucked away in his sleeve.

The demon rolled his eyes. "Isn't it obvious, boys?" He stopped and spared a wink for Julie, adding, "And you too, Juliet, darling. I'm here to support my dear friend Dean in his time of trouble."

"Yeah right," Sam growled. "You haven't so much as showed your face since you got him to start using the Blade again. You don't care about Dean, so don't pretend to."

"You'd be surprised, Moose," Crowley said coolly. "I really am here to help save Dean from his own stupidity. But if you don't want my help, and you'd rather big brother die-"

"We want your help," Julie said quickly. Sam and Cas shot her a look. "What? We do! Anything that can help Dean, we'll take it."

"Smart girl," the demon smirked. "Nice to see _someone _here still cares about Dean."

"Shut up," Sam snapped. "Look, Crowley, if you can help, fine. But get to the point. He doesn't have a lot of time left."

"Well, we all agree Dean can't die today, right?" Crowley asked them. They nodded with varying levels of enthusiasm. "I mean, even if you all weren't crazy about the man, we'd still need him to take out these Knights of Hell. And we know what will save him, and I believe you, Sam, know where it is."

"Actually, I gave it to Cas," Sam admitted.

"I can retrieve the First Blade easily, if that is needed," the angel said coolly, still eying the demon distrustfully. "But I want to know how you know what's going on, Crowley. We didn't let you know-"

"Like I need that," Crowley smirked. "I've been keeping tabs on you hunters, making sure you're not getting yourself killed. And then when Dean decided to pull this whole dying early shit, I decided you needed some help."

"Wait," Julie said suddenly. "Even if we get the Blade for him, he's got to kill something to not die."

"I'll get you a Knight-loyalist demon, easy," Crowley smirked. "I've got about eight lined up."

Julie didn't bother asking about that, but instead pointed out, "But even then… _Dean's _got to kill the demon. He has to make the choice, and he won't."

"Let me worry about that," the demon smirked. "Let's just get to work, shall we?"

* * *

><p>Dean gritted his teeth and tried to stretch his arm. The stitches in his right arm and chest burned as he tried to move, and his sprained arm screamed in protest. Dean stopped trying to move his arm and shook his head. God, he was useless!<p>

He wanted to go find Sam and Julie and Cas, to force them to sit down and look him in the eye and listen to him. If they really loved him, and he knew they did, they would understand if they would just _listen_. He knew it was hard, of course it was hard! He wasn't ready to say goodbye to any of them. He needed more time to tease Cas and get him caught up on all the great movies and references he was missing out on. He needed another few days to sit on a couch, watching shitty TV with his little brother, or to just drive and talk and laugh in his car for hours. He needed another dozen nights with Julie, to hold her and kiss her and make sure that he would remember every little thing about her through whatever came after this. He had to thank Cas for everything and tell Jules how much he loved her and somehow find a way to let Sammy go, after nearly thirty-three years of hanging on too tightly.

He couldn't do this. Who was he kidding? Maybe he should just use the Blade so he wouldn't have to say goodbye just yet.

But if he did that, then when he did have to say goodbye to the people he loved…he wouldn't love them. This was how he wanted his brother and his best friend and the woman he loved to remember him. Flawed and hurting, but human. Green eyes, not black.

"They really shouldn't let you drive," a familiar voice commented, and Dean almost jumped out of bed. Then he rolled his eyes when he saw that it was just the former king of hell sitting in the chair next to him, watching the crappy daytime TV on his television. It had been almost four hours since Cas left his room, four hours of being alone, and he was relieved to see someone familiar, even if it was Crowley…

"What?" Dean snapped, confused and irritated. You could insult Dean's character or motives or just about anything, and he'd agree with you, but you could _not _insult his driving.

"This is the second time you've crashed that car within the past few months, and if I were dear old Sammy or Juliet, I wouldn't let Dean drive anymore. Just saying."

"The hell are you doing here, Crowley?" Dean said coldly.

"I'm here to grieve the death of my dear friend," the demon said in a falsely-sweet voice. Dean shot him a cold look, and Crowley sighed. "Fine. I'm here to bust you out, Dean. I'm doing you a favor, and you should be grateful."

"Bust me out?" Dean repeated.

"You've got one day left to live, right? I just assumed you wouldn't want to spend it cooped up in a boring hospital room."

"I'm not exactly able to just walk out of here," Dean pointed out.

"That's why I'm here," Crowley said, standing up. "I've already talked to the nurses, and by talked to them, I mean put them under a spell." Dean frowned, and the demon said quickly, "Don't _worry_! I didn't hurt them, I promise. They're just going to let you walk out of here without a second thought is all. They'll go back to normal as soon as you're gone."

"Why do you care?" Dean asked suspiciously. He had learned the hard way not to assume this demon's motives were pure, ever.

"Well, I had hoped I could convince you not to get yourself killed, but your little friends have assured me you're stuck in that," Crowley said darkly. "Oh, and about that…you're an idiot. You know death won't save you, Dean. You know where you're going, and there's nothing on this earth worse than that."

There must have been some small part of Dean that had hoped he would end up in heaven, because as soon as Crowley said that, he felt something in him die. So he really was about to go back to hell. He supposed he deserved it, but that didn't make it any easier! Dean knew better than to just believe everything Crowley said, but this was something he had already known.

"At least they'll be safe from me," Dean muttered.

Crowley rolled his eyes. "You're a fool, Dean Winchester. Don't know why they stick around you. But I'm just supposed to get you out of here. Your friends will be waiting for you, and then you all can sit around crying until Death comes to take you home. Whatever. Not my problem."

"You're right, it's not," Dean snapped, getting shakily to his feet. "Let's just get out of here."

Dean would have loved to walk out of that hospital with his head held high, but he wasn't strong enough. His legs shook dangerously underneath his weight, and a couple times he had to cling to the wall for support. At one point, he stumbled and fell, and Crowley had to grab his arm and haul him upright. As humiliating as it was, Dean found himself leaning on the demon for support as he walked shakily out of the hospital and into the sunny parking lot.

For some reason, Crowley led him into a patch of woods nearby. Dean began to get suspicious of the demon the farther into the trees he was led, and with his free hand that wasn't leaning on Crowley, he reached into the waistband of his jeans and pulled out an angel blade.

Suddenly, Crowley stopped and stepped away from Dean. He managed to stand on his own. "What the hell, Crowley?" Dean snapped. "There's nothing here."

Suddenly, three figures stepped out of the shadows of the woods, one of them dragging another wriggling figure. Dean relaxed when he saw Sam, Julie, and Cas, and then stiffened again when he saw the stony cold expressions on their face.

"What's going on?" he asked the demon, angel, and two hunters standing in front of him.

Cas pulled the hood off of the person he was dragging with him, revealing a thin man with stringy hair and wild eyes. Cas threw the man forward and the man turned and hissed at the angel, his eyes flashing pure black.

Dean's stomach dropped out of him, and at the same time the Mark of Cain on his arm began to throb painfully.

"Alright, you've had your fun, angel," the demon snarled at Castiel. "Just kill me already."

"Oh, he's not going to kill you," Crowley said calmly, and the demon whirled around.

"Crowley?" the demon cried. "What are you doing here? With the _Winchesters_?" Then the demon suddenly grinned maliciously. "Oh no…you wouldn't. You're not that stupid."

"What are you talking about?" Sam snapped at the demon.

"Nothing much, Winchester," the demon cackled. "Just that this demon's been playing you is all. He doesn't work for you boys anymore. Unless he's trying to join this side again, in which case he'll end up dead. I think he knows what happens to those who betray our lord Beelzebub."

"What?" Julie snapped, her cold composure breaking. "Crowley…are you working with Beelzebub?"

"An issue for a later time," the demon said carefully.

"No, I'd say that's an issue for now," Sam growled, raising his demon-killing knife. "Have you been selling us out?!"

"No!" Crowley snapped. "I'm here, aren't I? I'm helping you hunters, when I probably shouldn't. We can talk more about this later, once this sniveling coward is dead and your Dean's back to full health."

"What?" Dean asked slowly. "Are you guys…did you do this?" His eyes searched first Sam, then Julie, then Cas, and found guilt in all or them. "You were trying to get me to kill this demon? After I told you what my choice was?!"

"Dean, we cannot let you die," Cas said as calmly as he could. "That is not an option."

"Neither is this!" Dean cried. "I can't believe you would do this to me!"

"Oh, calm down," Crowley sighed. "It wasn't their idea, you idiot. It was me. I just convinced them. Now kill the demon so we can get on with it."

"No," Dean growled. "I won't."

Crowley rolled his eyes. "Oh, quit being such a drama queen and kill him!"

"Dean, please…" Julie pleaded.

Dean closed his eyes for a moment and steadied himself. "No. One of you can kill that thing. I've made my choice."

"That's it," Crowley snapped, and then he waved his arm. Dean was slammed backwards into a tree, and his angel blade disappeared into the shadows several feet away.

"Dean!" Julie shrieked, just as Sam yelled, "What are you doing?"

The demon turned and tried to run, and Crowley snarled, "Castiel, stop that demon, but do not kill it, or your precious Dean is going to die."

Cas hesitated for half a second, and then put out his hand. The demon flew backwards and landed on its back in the center of the group. It lay there, breathing quickly, terrified, as the two hunters and angel stared at Dean and Crowley.

The former king of hell walked calmly up to Dean as he struggled against the invisible force pinning him to the tree. "The hell are you doing?" Dean growled as the demon approached him.

In answer, Crowley reached inside his jacket and pulled out the First Blade.

Dean's breaths quickened and his eyes widened. The Mark of Cain was burning his arm now, screaming for him to take that Blade and kill that demon on the ground with it. It took all of his willpower to get out, "No. No, please, _don't_!"

Crowley advanced on Dean, his face cold and expressionless. Dean knew he wouldn't get through to the demon, but surely his brother or Julie or Cas would break. "Please!" he begged them. "Don't do this to me!"

Julie looked like she was about to cry, and Sam looked like it was taking every ounce of self-control he had not to run over there and push Crowley off of Dean. Cas looked conflicted, but in the end, none of them moved to help Dean.

Crowley grabbed Dean's right arm and forced his hand open. Dean didn't even have the strength to resist him. He was dying, for God's sake! "Wait!" Dean cried, just as Crowley forced the First Blade into Dean's hand.

His fist closed around the Blade without him telling it to. Instantly, a rush of energy and strength shot through Dean. The force pinning him to the tree suddenly disappeared, and his arm shot out, throwing Crowley backwards. Dean stood there, feeling new power slowly filling him. His wounds still hurt a bit, but nowhere near as badly as they had before. He flexed his arms, appreciating the strength in them once again, and then his eyes landed on the demon lying on the ground.

Dean slowly walked over to the pathetic demon. It sniveled and begged him to have mercy, shrieking and screaming. Dean knew he shouldn't kill it, but he couldn't remember why. All he knew was this thing was evil, and the Blade was screaming at him to kill it.

And so, with no more than a few seconds hesitation, Dean lopped the demon's head off.

Oh god, why hadn't he killed before? This feeling was so sweet, this strength and power and new life…Dean was on a high like he hadn't experienced in weeks. He stretched his arms, his injuries all but forgotten, and grinned fiercely.

Julie found herself fighting the urge to cower behind Sam as she watched new life return to Dean. His skin became flushed instead of pale, and he stood up straighter and stronger. There was new life in his eyes, but also a new darkness.

He was saved…but he wasn't. Not really. And although she knew she should be happy he wasn't about to die, all Julie wanted to do was cry.

* * *

><p>"God, you three look like you were just at a funeral. You know he's not actually going to die anymore, right?" Crowley sighed as he studied the three people before him. Sam and Julie sat very close to each other at the table in the bunker, trying to take comfort in each other's presence. Both of them looked like they hadn't slept in a week, and Julie's eyes were still a little red from crying. Castiel sat with his head in his hands.<p>

"I don't want to talk about it," Julie muttered. "You know what I do want to talk about? That stuff the demon said, about you working with Beelzebub?"

"Yeah, that's right," Sam growled. "So…what? Are you betraying us? Should we go ahead and kill you, too?"

Crowley rolled his eyes. "If I was really betraying you, I wouldn't have risked everything to help you."

"Except that Beelzebub wants Dean to be using the Blade," Julie pointed out. "So, really, you could have been working for him this whole time."

"You're right," Crowley said. "Beelzebub sent me to find Dean and make sure he start using the First Blade again."

"What?" Sam snapped. "So…you _did _sell us out?" He suddenly stood up, shaking the table as he slammed his fist down on it in anger. "That was all a trick? What did you do to my brother?"

"I saved his bloody life!" Crowley growled. "It was clear none of you were going to do it. You should be thanking me, because otherwise he would have died two hours ago."

Julie glanced down, trying not to imagine that. But Sam was still pissed. "You should have told us that Beelzebub wanted this to happen!" he snapped.

"You still would have done it though, wouldn't you?" the demon smirked, and none of them spoke. "So who's really working with Beelzebub, then?"

"That does not matter," Cas said, lifting his head out of his hands. "What matters is whether or not you will continue to go behind out backs with the Knight of Hell."

"I will still be reporting back to him," Crowley shrugged. "But I'll keep doing the same thing I was before. I'll feed him enough of the truth to keep him happy and trusting me without endangering you people. You should be _grateful _to me!"

"So…you're saying you're like a double agent?" Julie asked slowly.

"Precisely," Crowley smirked. "I still want the Knights dead as much as I did before. But I figured an easier way to get rid of them was from the inside."

"If he's telling the truth, that was a smart move," Julie admitted.

"I'm still not sure I believe him," Sam muttered suspiciously.

"Of course you're not," Crowley said, rolling his eyes. "How do I prove to you I'm on your side, Moose?"

Sam hesitated and thought about it. "Keep in touch with us," he said slowly. "Keep us updated on what his plans are, especially for Dean. And if you ever find out that one of the Knights is alone, tell us where, and we'll get Dean there and start taking them out, one by one."

"Brilliant plan," Crowley smirked. "Too bad I thought of it weeks ago."

Sam rolled his eyes. "Just know that if we find out you're playing us and not them…we _will _kill you."

"Ooh, scary," the demon muttered. "I should be getting back before Beelzebub gets suspicious." He looked at Julie. "Make sure your boyfriend doesn't try to kill himself again, darling. We need him alive."

With that, the demon was gone. Julie put her head in her arms again, not wanting to think or feel. If she thought about what they had done today, she would just feel even worse about what she'd done to Dean. She had seen the betrayal in his eyes, followed by the darkness in them after he killed the demon.

That was on her. She had listened to Crowley, and she hadn't stopped him. Yes, Dean was alive, but he wouldn't be Dean much longer…

"I should return to my brothers and sisters," Castiel said after a long moment.

"Right," Sam sighed. "Wow. I forgot about that whole Metatron mess with everything else going on."

Cas sighed. "Keep me updated on Dean. Let me know if he gets any better…or worse."

"Or if he actually talks to us ever again?" Sam finished darkly.

As soon as Cas had gotten the Blade away from Dean and healed his remaining wounds, the man hadn't spoken a word to any of them. Cas had transported them all back to the bunker, and Dean had slept for a couple of hours. Then he had spoken his only words, a simple request for Cas to bring what was left of his Impala to the bunker's garage. Cas had done so, and Dean had disappeared into the garage almost four hours ago and not come out. They were beginning to wonder if he ever would.

And Julie couldn't really blame him. He had told them what he wanted, what he had decided, and they went behind his back with a demon and tricked him into doing the one thing he refused to do.

Cas left for heaven, and Sam went to get some rest himself. Julie sat alone at the table for a while, before finally deciding to risk it.

She made her way to the bunker's garage and stepped inside. It was a huge, wide-open space, and one of Dean's favorite rooms in the entire place. It was lined with classic cars, and in one corner was a crumpled mess of a 1967 Chevy Impala. Julie felt her stomach flip seeing the crumpled front half of Dean's Baby and remembering the horror of seeing all of the blood and glass and broken bodies in the front seat right after they crashed.

Angry classic rock was blaring from a speaker near the car, and Julie edged nearer, looking around for Dean. She finally noticed his legs sticking out from under the car. As she got closer, he wheeled himself out from underneath the car. Dean was wearing a black muscle shirt and a very old, ripped, oil-stained pair of jeans. He noticed her and wiped the oil off of his hands and face before turning the music off.

Julie waited for Dean to speak, but he didn't. He didn't even look at her, just tossed the oil rag over his shoulder and turned back to his car. He picked up a couple tools Julie didn't recognize (she knew about a lot of things, but she did not know how to fix a car), and went to work on the crumpled hood.

She watched him for a while, trying to focus on the way his powerful muscles moved as he worked on the car and not the inflamed Mark of Cain on his arm made all too apparent by his lack of sleeves. Finally, she couldn't bear the silence anymore, and she asked, "Dean?"

He grunted in response, although that could have just been him grunting as he tried to strip the crumpled metal off the frame of the car. He'd have to build a lot of the car back from scratch.

Julie hesitated, and then said, "Look, Dean, I'm…I'm really sorry about what happened. I wish there had been another way, any other way…"

She waited for him to argue with her, or yell and cuss and rage at her. She wouldn't care. She deserved it.

But Dean didn't say a word.

"I'm sorry," she repeated, and he didn't speak. "Dean, please talk to me!" she snapped suddenly.

To her surprise, he turned to face her. "What do you want me to say?" he asked flatly.

"I…I don't know," she said, lost. "Yell at me, get pissed for what we did, tell me you hate me, I don't care, just…talk to me."

"You did what you thought was right," Dean said flatly. "And it worked. I'm not dead. So, good job. Glad things went the way you and Crowley planned."

He turned back around and went back to work. Julie stood there for a couple more minutes in silence. She wasn't sure what she had wanted, but it wasn't that. She wanted him to yell at her until he got everything off his chest. Then she could explain her reasoning, and then he could confide in her how he was losing it, and she could hold him while he broke down until he got everything out, and then they could work together to put him together again. They had done it before, and they could do it again. He just had to understand why she had let that happen to him, and how she couldn't lose him, and they could find a way to make this work together.

"Dean, I'm sorry," she whispered after a long silence. "But I couldn't lose you."

Julie turned and left. Dean waited until he was sure she was gone, and then he dropped his wrench and fell to his knees. He leaned back against the buckled bed of his beloved car and held his arm, staring at the Mark until the tears faded.

He closed his eyes, hoping to find some relief, and instead found himself staring into his own face. He was grinning, and there was blood spattered on his face. Dean smirked cockily and said, "See, Dean? There's no point in fighting. No matter what happens, this is how it ends. You're going to become…_me_."

And his eyes flashed pure black.


	32. Chapter 32

**Author's Note: A quick word about this chapter-first off, I had a lot of fun writing this chapter, and I'm excited for the next one. The reason why: Cain. I had always planned on bringing Cain into this story about this time, if it got this far (thanks for that by the way, guys!), because I love that character and his relationship with Dean and his importance to the story. He needed to come back at least once, in my opinion. After seeing the most recent Supernatural episode featuring Cain, I was inspired to write him in now. If you see any similarities between that episode and the way the next couple of chapters go, it's because I think that they wrote Cain and Dean's next interaction exactly how it had to go. I hope you enjoy!**

**Chapter Thirty-Two**

Dean forgave them. It took a few days, but his anger and betrayal slowly melted and faded away.

It started in little things. The next day after returning to the bunker, Sam came into the garage with a plate of burgers he had grilled for lunch. Dean took a couple and ate them and made a joke about how the burgers he made were always better. Encouraged by that, Julie came by later that day with dinner. She sat there with him while he ate and told him about how Crowley was working as a double agent. Dean said he didn't trust the demon, but then again none of them really did.

He didn't come to bed that night, but Julie hadn't expected that.

The next day, Dean was in the kitchen, making himself breakfast when Sam and Julie got up. They greeted him, and he nodded at them before returning to his work. That afternoon, Sam and Julie risked going down to the garage and saw that he was making a lot of progress on the Impala. They talked with Dean for a little bit, talking only about the car, and he seemed friendly enough. He worked on the car until about eight or nine, and then he came into the living room, where Julie and Sam were watching TV, grabbed a beer, and sat in a separate chair and watched with them. He didn't say much, but he was there, and that was something.

After a couple hours, they got up and got ready for bed. Julie noticed Dean hesitating, unsure of where to go, and she asked him gently to come to bed with her. He gave in and they slept in the same bed. He was still a bit cold and stiff towards her, but it was a big step forwards.

The next day, Dean let Sam come into the garage with him and help him work on the car. It was coming along very well, and they decided to take a break for lunch. Dean sat next to Julie and was downright friendly. She too came into the garage with them after lunch and noticed that things seemed to be almost back to normal between Sam and Dean. After a while, Sam ducked out of the garage, leaving the two of them alone, and Julie sat and watched Dean finish up the engine. Cas had also brought him all the parts he needed to fix the car, and things were going very quickly. He _had _rebuilt the car from scratch before, after all.

Julie and Dean talked for a while, keeping the topics friendly and light-hearted. When Dean was pretty much done with the car, he sat down with Julie and actually talked to her instead of the car. She noticed the way he was trying and failing not to touch the inflamed Mark on his arm.

Finally, she threw all pretenses away. "How are you doing, Dean?" she asked, nodding towards his arm.

He looked down. "I'm…not so good."

She sighed. "This is my fault," she muttered.

"It's actually Crowley's."

"It's mine as much as Crowley's," she snapped. "I let him do this to you."

"Actually, if we're being technical, this is all my fault," Dean pointed out. "I'm the one who chose to get this Mark in the first place."

"Can we not put everything on you for once?" Julie sighed.

Dean sighed. "Fine. But just because I'm still mad at you."

She frowned. "Really? I'm so sorry, Dean! What can I do to make it up to you?"

But to her surprise, Dean just laughed. And not a mean laugh, an honestly amused laugh. "I was joking," he admitted.

"Oh." She blinked. "So…you're not mad at us anymore?"

"I guess not," he sighed. "I understand why you did what you did. Honestly…I probably would have done the same for you or Sammy…"

"It still doesn't make it right, what we did," Julie said.

"No," Dean sighed. "But I can't exactly get mad at you guys for messing up when that's all I do."

"Dean-" Julie protested, but he surprised her by kissing her briefly, just to shut her up.

When he pulled away, he smiled slightly, and she smiled back. "By the way, you should know you're really freaking hot when you're working on that car," Julie said, smirking slightly.

"Good to know," Dean grinned, leaning in and kissing her again.

He soon made his peace with Sam and called up Cas and made up with him as well. While their trick really had hurt, and he was constantly reminded of it by the evil urges he constantly had to fight against, Dean knew he probably didn't have long left with the people he loved before he went dark, and he didn't want to waste it fighting. So, for the next week as they sat around the bunker doing research and waiting for a lead on the Knights or a way to help Dean, the three of them were almost back to their normal, happy, easy relationship.

One night, after a long day of doing a lot of research and making zero progress, Dean was ready for a break. He was ready to have some fun. When he came into his bedroom, Julie was lying on her side on top of the covers, still fully clothed, reading a book. He couldn't explain it, but she looked so beautiful just lying there in the same jeans and tank top she wore all the time, her hair loose and wild. It was getting longer now than it had been when he first met her, and all of the sudden he wanted to run his hands through her hair and kiss her like he hadn't in a long time.

Julie looked up, surprised, as Dean plopped down on the bed next to her and swiped her book. He tossed it onto the nightstand, and she raised an eyebrow. "You better have noticed what page I was on before you shut that," she smirked.

Dean didn't reply, either because he hadn't noticed, or he was really only focused on one thing right now. Probably that second one. He had that look in his eyes, the one that meant he was really friggin' horny, and nothing else mattered. Julie wasn't going to fight him though, since it had been a long time since they had just been together with no drama or unspoken emotions between them. If Dean just wanted to have a lot of sex, she wasn't really going to complain.

He pulled her closer to him and kissed her for a long time. Julie ran one hand through his hair, and another over the muscles in his arm. Dean ran his fingers through her hair, pressed his hand against the small of her back, causing pressure to build in her, and then his hands slid to her jeans. He started to unbutton her jeans, and Julie went with it. She grabbed the hem of his dark grey t-shirt and started to slide it up over his head.

Dean was kissing Julie's neck, and she had nearly gotten his shirt off, when all of the sudden someone cleared their throat.

Julie's eyes flew open and she froze, shocked and a little embarrassed, at least until she saw it was just Cas. He looked a lot more mortified than either Dean or Julie, and she was glad he had shown up before things got a lot more…_intimate_. She was close with the angel, and Dean was even closer, but Julie was sure none of the three of them actually wanted Cas to see the two of them naked.

Dean sighed and buttoned Julie's jeans back up before rolling onto his back, his arms still around her. "Cas, there had better be a reason you're in our bedroom at ten o'clock, especially when we're…_busy_."

"Glad to see you're back to normal," the angel said, smirking slightly.

Dean smirked back. "I know, we all missed the old me. That dying, suicidal one…what a buzzkill."

Julie glanced down, trying to ignore the casual way he talked about how close he had come to dying. As if sensing her pain, Dean rubbed her bare shoulder with his thumb, trying to give her some sort of comfort.

"And you really are okay, Dean?" Castiel asked uncertainly, shifting awkwardly. He really wished they would sit up and pretend they weren't just about to have sex, but it didn't seem to bother either of them the way it embarrassed him. Of course, it was _Dean_. The man had taken him to strip clubs on several occasions, tried to get Cas to sleep with women even when he was an angel, and Cas had quickly gotten used to the many women that came and went in Dean Winchester's sex life. If he was being honest with himself, he liked this Dean better, the one who was faithful to one wonderful woman.

Dean glanced around the room, realized it was just two people he loved and could confide in, and sighed. "Nope," he shrugged. "But I'm dealing." He brushed his hand across Julie's hair. "I've got her and Sammy looking out for me, and apparently you too, Cas. Plus, Jasper and Jody have both been calling every other day, trying to pretend they're not checking up on me. Anyway, point is, I'll be okay. I'll stay human until we can find those Knights."

Dean suddenly sat up. Julie did the same. "Wait. Did you find one? Or all of them? Is that why you're here?" Dean tried to sound eager, but Julie and Cas both heard the fear under his words.

"No," Cas said gravely. "But a couple of days ago, Crowley contacted me and said the Knights of Hell are looking for Cain. He is still the oldest and strongest of the Knights of Hell, and they obviously want him dead before he can try to put them back in that pit, but first…Beelzebub apparently believes Cain can tell him how to make you succumb to the First Blade and the Mark of Cain once and for all, Dean."

Julie couldn't help it. She gasped and clutched onto Dean's arm, careful not to brush against the Mark on his forearm. "But…he can't do that, right? He can't do that, can he, Cas?"

"I don't know," the angel said gravely. "After Crowley gave me that warning, I left the angels to search for Cain."

"What?" Dean snapped. "Cas, how could you do that? You have to put the angels first, not me!"

"Hannah has become quite the warrior, and she has some good angels underneath her," Cas sighed. "They can take care of themselves, and she leads them while I am away. Besides, Metatron's numbers are dwindling. The more evils he forces them to commit, the more followers he loses. Perhaps there is still hope."

"God, I hope so," Julie said. "You said he's losing followers?"

"Yes. In fact, he's no longer attacking us. My angels are usually the ones leading the attacks now, so there may be hope. We avoid killing at all costs, while he murders ruthlessly, which is against an angel's nature. His followers are beginning to realize that he is wrong. Perhaps we can get rid of that monster once and for all."

"I sure as hell hope so," Dean muttered. "I'm glad that's going well, but what about this whole Cain issue?"

"That's why I'm here," the angel said. "Like I said, I've been searching for Cain for two days, and it turns out…I think he wanted me to find him, Dean."

"Wait. You found him?" Dean asked nervously.

"Yes," Cas said. "Or, rather, _he_ found _me_ earlier today. I was searching a small town where he had been known to reside before, and he approached me. He wanted to see you, Dean, and he made me promise to bring you to the house where you first met him at midnight tonight."

"Are you serious?" Dean asked, standing up.

"Why would I joke about this?"

Dean sighed. "Well, that's…wow." He ran a hand through his hair. Julie got up too and stood near him, unsure whether or not she should be trying to comfort him or excited for him. Perhaps this demon who started this whole mess could help Dean fix it.

Julie touched Dean's shoulder just to remind him he wasn't alone. "That's soon," she commented. "I assume this demon isn't stupid enough to think we'll just send Dean there alone?"

"Jules, it's not safe for you to be there," Dean said firmly. "Whatever happens between me and Cain, it probably won't end well, and it'll be dangerous for anyone to be there."

"That sucks, doesn't it, since I _will _be there," she said firmly. "You are not going to be alone with the father of murder, the one who gave you that Mark. Not an option."

"Try telling him that," Dean muttered.

"Gladly. That demon thinks he's telling me what to do, then he is very, very mistaken."

Dean shook his head, smiling slightly. "Does Sam know what's going on?" Dean asked Cas suddenly.

"Not yet," the angel admitted. "I figured you'd want to tell him yourself."

Dean nodded. "Alright. I'll go get Sam caught up. We'll have to get ready pretty quickly, though. We've got what…an hour and a half?"

Castiel nodded. Dean took a deep breath and walked out of the room to find his little brother, leaving Julie and Cas to talk. Once he was out of their sight, though, he leaned against the wall and gripped his arm tightly, and realized the Mark was throbbing at the same rate as his heart. Just the mere thought of the true owner of this Mark sent his control flying out the window.

However this encounter with Cain went, it wasn't going to end well for his self-control, that was for sure.

* * *

><p>Cain looked up as someone knocked on his door. For a moment, he closed his eyes and sucked in a slow breath, trying to focus. He felt the burning in his arm begin to grow, and sighed. So the angel had brought the boy, then. Well, he would have been a fool not to. To disobey Cain meant death to just about any creature in all of creation.<p>

Cain stood up and strode over to his front door. He calmly unlocked the door and opened it wide. It was raining slightly, and he saw four slightly damp people on his porch. It was hard to quite make them out in the dark, but he recognized the angel's trench coat blowing in the wind, the tall, long-haired outline of the younger brother, and he could tell from the way the Mark was burning that the tall, athletic man in front of him was indeed Dean Winchester. He didn't know the other figure, but it didn't matter. Only the boy would be staying.

"You came," he said calmly.

"Well, we weren't going to ignore a request from someone who could kill us as easily as you," the brother, Sam, said.

Cain stepped aside to let them in. Dean hesitated, so Sam stepped forward. And Cain put out his arm to stop him.

"What are you-?" Sam asked, surprised and startled.

"You are not staying," he said flatly.

"The hell I'm not!" the youngest Winchester snapped. He was closer to the door, so Cain could now make out his face. He had seen pictures of the younger Winchester, who was now nearing thirty-three. And even though this boy looked almost nothing like Cain's younger brother, Abel, it still hurt to see the little spark of hope and goodness in his eyes. Abel had carried that spark once, but that was long before Cain had finally killed him. Lucifer had twisted Cain's beloved brother and led him astray, and Cain knew that eventually, the devil had the same plans for this boy, if he was ever allowed to rise again.

Cain would be doing Sam Winchester a kindness if he just killed him now.

"I am doing this for your own good, boy," Cain said coldly. "You will not be staying here while I speak with your brother."

"Yes, I will, and if you try to stop me-"

"Sammy," Dean said gently, laying his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Just let it go. I'll be okay."

"Wise move, Dean Winchester," Cain said. "Believe me when I say it will be a lot safer for all of us, but him especially, if your brother stays clear of here."

Sam still didn't look like he agreed, but Dean stepped past him and into the house, and Cain let him. But before Cain could so much as put his arm out, the other figure stepped into the house right behind Dean, and Cain found himself staring at her.

She was odd. She didn't belong with these dark, dangerous men. Cain could see a bit of darkness and pain in her, but it was nothing compared to the two brothers. She stared up at him with big blue eyes, and instead of looking afraid like she should, she looked like she was challenging him to tell her to leave, too.

"Who is this?" he asked Dean darkly.

"My name is Julie Carters," the woman said. "I am a hunter, and I've been living and hunting with these men for about a year. I love Dean, and if you think you're confronting him without me here, you're dead wrong."

Dean held his breath, waiting for the demon to lose it and try to kill Julie. But instead, Cain just smiled slightly. "Alright. You can stay."

"What?" Sam snapped.

"If one of you insists on keeping an eye on your brother and I, believe me when I say she's a lot safer from Dean than you are where the Mark is involved," the father of murder said calmly, and Dean frowned. Both of them were safe from him! Well, actually…neither of them were.

"Castiel, take the boy and return to wherever you came from," Cain ordered. "I will contact you when I am done with Dean Winchester."

Sam gritted his teeth. He hated the way Cain said "done" with him, but what else could he do? This demon could kill him in half a second as soon as he got on his nerves.

Cas put a hand on Sam's shoulder, and they vanished. Cain shut the door and turned to the man and woman in front of him. He smirked slightly at their wary expressions and gestured to his couch. "Well. Take a seat."

Dean hesitated near the door, but Julie took his hand and half-dragged him to the couch. They sat down carefully, watching the demon as he went into the kitchen and returned a few moments later with a bottle of very strong alcohol and a few small glasses. Dean smirked slightly, recognizing the bottle as one of his personal favorites. Too much of the stuff could make you go blind, but just enough could wipe out the pain. Clearly, he and the father of murder liked to bury their past mistakes in alcohol.

"Anybody want a drink?" Cain asked coolly.

Dean started to reach for a glass, but Julie smacked his hand. "We should probably be sober for this," she said pointedly.

"When am I ever sober?" Dean muttered sullenly.

Cain raised his eyebrows, studying the two of them. There was something in the way they sat, so near to each other, their legs brushing against each other, and in the little glances they occasionally gave each other, as if checking to make sure the other was still there and alright…it was clear to Cain that Dean Winchester loved this woman fiercely, and that she loved him back. Cain found himself thinking of Colette… and instantly regretting it.

Julie tensed up as she realized Cain was glaring at the two of them with an intense sort of fury. Her hand slid slowly towards the canteen of holy water on her belt, but then the demon relaxed, and she wondered if she had been imagining it.

"So," Cain said carefully, pouring himself a glass and downing it easily. Dean really must be descended from this guy, if they could both drink like that. The demon's eyes darkened as they fell on Dean. "Did you bring the Blade?"

"I did," Julie said calmly, pulling a bundle out of her jacket. "Dean isn't using it at the moment. In fact, as far as I'm concerned, no one should be."

Cain chuckled and shook his head. "This girl you found, Dean…she's quite the tough one."

"Yes," Dean said, laying a hand on her leg. Cain didn't miss the protective way he'd done that, and the clear threat from this hunter that if he dared try to harm this woman, Dean wouldn't hesitate to kill Cain.

The Knight smirked slightly, leaning back in his seat. "Well, boy, I've been meaning to ask…how has my Mark been treating you?"

Dean tried to tone down the anger in his gaze as he looked at the demon. "Not so well, actually."

"Have you tried to kill your brother yet?" Cain smirked, and both Dean and Julie jumped. "Or perhaps this lovely girl?"

They both looked down, and Cain nodded. "So…it's begun. I'm surprised you've held out as long as you have, and I've heard you were able to give it up for a year. Quite impressive, son. So who held you accountable, then? Her?" He nodded at Julie. "Women do have a way of making a man gentler. I know Colette did."

Dean remembered Colette. When Cain had given his story in their last meeting, he had told Dean of a woman named Colette who he had fallen in love with, and who Abbadon had tricked him into killing. That meeting was a day he often replayed in his mind: fighting off those demons and proving his strength to Cain, getting the Mark of Cain from its namesake, listening to the wails of those demons as Cain massacred them and began to kill again. He remembered what the Knight of Hell had said before letting Dean and Crowley go; he had told Dean he would someday have to kill Cain. Dean knew this was probably that day, but he wasn't ready. Killing another Knight of Hell would speed him down the path of darkness so much, and he wanted to stay good with Julie and Sam and Cas. Was that too much to ask?

"Look, Cain," Dean sighed. "I've been fighting this Mark for a while. And I'm just here because I want to know if you've got some secret on how to fight it."

Cain laughed. "Boy, look at me! I'm a demon. I'm a Knight of Hell, the first. Do you really think there's a way to fight it, to stay human?"

"He's fought it this long," Julie said defensively.

"And how many times has he hurt you so far because of it?" the Knight asked. "How many times have you seen darkness in him? How many times have you feared him, girl? And how many more, before he's fully gone?"

"Stop it," she snapped. "If all you're going to do is threaten him and tell him he can't win, then I say we should just go now."

"You're not going anywhere," Cain said calmly.

"What?" Dean asked slowly and dangerously.

"I assumed she knew, when she came in here with you, she wasn't coming out." Cain frowned. "I thought she just wanted to make sure you didn't have to die alone."

"You're not killing him," Julie snapped, standing up.

"No, I'm not," Cain agreed. "I'm just holding you two here until Beelzebub or another one of my children get around to picking up their cargo."

"What?" Dean snarled, getting to his feet. "No! You're not with them. You're against them! You're the one who put them in the pit in the first place."

"I know what I did, boy," Cain snapped, standing as well. "But things have changed. Colette is gone, and when I had to save you and your pet demon from Abbadon's demons, the Mark grew strong again. I've given in to the killing once again, and when the Knights rose up again…well, I knew how this was going to end."

"Why would you help them?" Julie cried. "Dean tells me you're not as evil as any of them. Why would you possibly side with monsters like them?!"

"My other option would be to go on their rack and be tortured by the very beings I taught to torture," Cain said coldly. "And if that's not reason enough…Beelzebub has made me a promise. Once he rules, he will bring back Colette and set a place aside for both of us."

"And you believe him?" Dean asked darkly. "Damn. I never pegged you for an idiot, Cain."

"Hasn't he promised you the same for this girl and your brother and the angel, too?" the father of murder asked him coolly.

"Yes, and I ignored him, because he's obviously lying," Dean said. "Once he has us on his side, he's got no reason to keep his promise."

"You think I don't know that?" Cain growled. "Why do you think I'm only giving you two over and not myself? As long as I'm still free, he'll have to keep his promise."

"But you _know _these Knights are monsters!" Julie cried, still standing protectively near Dean. "How can you just give us over to them, when you know what they'll do to us? To Dean? He's a descendent of yours. How can you do this to him?"

"First of all, don't you ever expect a demon, especially a Knight of Hell, to do the right thing," Cain said darkly. "And as for him being a descendent of mine, that is not a good thing for him. My children were born out of death and darkness, and that is all that their lives will be. My line is cursed, and they're all murderers, like me. Look at your Dean and his brother. They've killed more than just about anyone, and they're still fighting on the good side. Can you even imagine once Dean joins the Knights?"

"He won't," Julie growled. "He won't give in. And I won't let you give him to them."

Cain shook his head. "There's nothing you can do, girl. If you would like, I will let you go. You and Sam Winchester and Castiel can go on with your lives. Why do you think I made sure your brother did not stay, Dean? I was trying to spare him, and I will spare this girl too, if she wishes. Only you have to stay."

"No!" Julie snapped, while Dean said at the same time, "Go."

"What?" Julie cried. "Dean, I'm not leaving you!"

"If Cain is willing to let you go and let you be safe, I'm not going to try to change his mind," the hunter said gravely. "I'm sorry, Jules. But at least you'll be safe."

"No," she said just as firmly as before. "I'm not leaving you."

Cain shook his head. Foolish girl. Willing to suffer and die at the hands of the Knights of Hell so her boyfriend wouldn't have to be alone. It was stupid, and sweet.

Suddenly, Julie reached onto her belt and splashed something on Cain. He hissed in pain as holy water splashed onto his face and arm, burning him for a moment. When his vision cleared, Julie was at the door, with Dean a couple steps behind her. She opened the door, but she was too late.

Dean cried out as Julie went flying through the air away from the door. She slammed into the wall and lay there, stunned, for a moment. He took a step towards her, and the door slammed shut behind him. Before he could take more than a couple steps towards Julie, her body was lifted up by an invisible force and pushed into one of the heavy oak chairs sitting at the dinner table. Ropes uncoiled themselves and bound her ankles and wrists tightly to the chair, and by the time she was fully recovered from being thrown into the wall, she was hopelessly trapped.

Dean turned on Cain, who was glaring at him, breathing heavily. "You're a fool, girl," the demon spat at Julie. "Both of you. There is no escaping here."

The Blade was still sitting in its bundle on the couch, but that was behind Cain. Dean wasn't getting to that any time soon, so he had to improvise. He pulled the angel blade off of his belt and squared his shoulders, shifting into a fighting position.

Cain chuckled, shifting into a nearly identical position. "You really wish to fight _me_, Dean Winchester?" he laughed. "You may have killed hundreds, but I _invented _murder. You can't win, boy."

"Gotta try, though," Dean muttered, and he lunged forward.

The demon easily deflected his first strike, but Dean was quick, and he was out of Cain's range before he could make a counterattack. Dean sized the Knight up, trying to plan a better attack, and was instead distracted by the changes in the demon.

Cain looked different than the last time Dean had seen him, over a year ago. His silver hair was longer, falling almost to his shoulders in gentle silver curls. His face was harsher somehow, but he also looked healthier than he had last time. Clearly, returning to killing had hardened the Knight of Hell, who had seemed almost compassionate the last time Dean had seen him, but he did seem to be thriving now that he was taking lives again. Dean wondered if this would soon be him. But no, most likely he was going to die fighting this near invincible demon before that could ever happen.

Dean lunged forward again, and this strike was stronger and cleverer than the last one. But Cain brought out his own knife and blocked Dean's strike. For a moment, the two men grappled with each other, but Cain was stronger, and he threw Dean back. The hunter stumbled slightly before he got his footing.

Julie strained at the ropes tying her to the chair as she realized how uneven this fight was. The father of murder stood there calmly, eying her boyfriend almost smugly as Dean tried to find a weakness in the demon's defenses. She hated how useless she was, especially since, as a trained fighter, she could easily tell what was about to happen. Everything about Cain from the way he stood to the cold glint in his eyes spoke of a predator who knew he was superior. And everything about Dean from the defensive crouch he stood in, even though he was the one on the attack, to the desperation in his eyes told her that Dean knew he couldn't win.

Dean lunged forward again anyway, making a clever feint. Any normal opponent would have tried to block his false strike and found a knife in their throat, but Cain seemed to know what Dean was doing before he did, even. Cain's blade was there to block Dean's, and the demon performed a clever twist of his knife, sending Dean's flying out of his hand and sliding across the floor to stop several feet out of the hunter's reach.

Dean was now inside the demon's reach, and he knew the Knight of Hell should flick that knife out and stab him, but instead Cain just smirked. "You were a fool, Dean Winchester. You should have just had the girl leave safely and gone along with Beelzebub. Otherwise, this wouldn't have to happen."

Cain backhanded Dean, hard, and the man stumbled a couple feet back. Somehow, Cain was there, though, and he drove his fist into Dean's gut, causing the younger man to double over in pain. Julie shrieked Dean's name, but the demon ignored her, hitting Dean twice more in the stomach.

Dean tried to straighten up and fight back, and Cain slugged him hard in the jaw. Dean stumbled sideways into a dresser and used it to straighten up. Then he lunged forward and punched Cain across the jaw. The demon rolled with the hit, and he caught Dean's left fist as he tried to hit him again. Cain slowly twisted Dean's arm farther and farther, and Dean couldn't pull free of his grip.

Julie screamed for Cain to stop as there was a sharp pop in Dean's arm and the man howled in pain. Cain dropped Dean, and he fell to his knees. The Knight of Hell kicked the hunter in the back, hard, and he went sprawling onto the rug.

"Stay down until Beelzebub or one of his underlings gets here, or I'll have to do worse than that," Cain said coldly, and then he walked away from Dean to go pour himself another glass of that alcohol.

Julie tried everything in her power to get free, but she was completely trapped. Her heart broke seeing Dean lying there on the ground at her feet, his shoulder dislocated, and a couple bruises already forming on his face. She wanted to talk to him and make sure he was alright, but she needed to deal with the more pressing matter.

"Why are you doing this?" she asked Cain softly.

He turned to face her, his eyes cold. "I told you. The Knights of Hell-"

"Don't scare you, so don't pretend you're afraid of them," she snapped. "You defeated them once before, and you could do it again."

"They'll give me back my Colette," Cain said after a brief pause, and for one the first times in her life, she saw an honest emotion from a demon, not just hatred or anger. The demon looked so pitifully sad, and there was so much longing in his voice as he spoke of this Colette.

"They won't," Dean said darkly, and Julie and Cain both looked to see that he had rolled onto his back and propped himself up slightly with his good arm. He made no move to get up all the way, though, so Cain didn't attack again. He gave the demon an icy look and said, "You know that. They'll give you back some twisted shell of her, or they won't give her back to you at all. Or, worst of all, they'll give her back to you the way she was when she died, and she'll be so horrified by this monster you've become she won't want to be with you."

Cain glowered at the hunter and stalked over to Julie. "What if it was her, boy?" the demon growled, touching the side of Julie's face. She suppressed a shudder. "What if _you _were in my shoes, and you had to choose between handing me over to them or never seeing her again?"

Dean gulped. He knew what choice he would make. How could he argue with Cain if he was no better than him?

Cain smirked bitterly. "See, Dean. You're no different from me."

"He's better than you," Julie snarled. "He would never work with them, no matter what."

Cain shook his head and studied Julie. "She really believes in you, doesn't she?" he asked Dean. Julie didn't like the way his cold, dark eyes seemed to see into every part of her. "She's very…_good_. Not often you meet someone this good in this line of work, especially after time in hell." Julie blinked, and the demon smirked slightly. "Yes, I can see the mark your time there has left on you. And if I hand you over to those demons, they'll only put you through even more." He fingered the knife that he had put back on his belt and studied Julie sadly. "It would be kinder just to kill you now."

"Try it and you're dead," Dean snarled. There was an edge to his voice that Julie hadn't heard in about a week, and sure enough, when she and Cain looked up, they saw that Cain had made a fatal mistake. He had gotten distracted, and Dean had somehow gotten up and to the coffee table without Cain noticing.

Because there, in his hands, was the First Blade.

"This is about to get interesting," Cain chuckled, stepping away from Julie. She held her breath as the two men, the two bearers of the Mark of Cain, circled each other. She was worried by how amused Cain was, since he should be afraid. Dean could now kill him, and yet the Knight only seemed intrigued.

Dean lunged forward again, and the demon tried to dodge, but with the Blade, Dean was now faster and stronger. Cain ended up having to block the Blade with his own silver one. Instead of backing away, Dean attacked again. But for every powerful strike he made, Cain countered easily. The demon began to frown as he matched Dean every step of the way.

"This is wrong," the Knight of Hell said suddenly. "You should be stronger with the Blade. Unless…" Cain smirked slightly. "You're holding back, aren't you, son? You really believe if you don't give into the Blade and use it to its full potential, you'll be saved? _Nothing _can save you, Dean Winchester."

Dean's expression darkened, and he suddenly tried to stab Cain in the stomach. But the demon had anticipated this, and he dodged. He brought his own knife down and swiped a three inch cut down Dean's wrist to his hand. Dean winced as his skin sliced open, and against his will, his injured hand released the First Blade.

Cain swept it out of Dean's reach with his foot, and he swung his knife again. A strike that could have sliced Dean's throat open missed as he dodged and instead made a gash on his cheek. Dean tried to throw up his hands to catch Cain's wrist and wrestle the knife away from him, but the Knight of Hell suddenly grabbed Dean's already-dislocated shoulder and twisted it at a horribly wrong angle.

Dean groaned in pain, and Julie screamed his name, struggling pathetically against these ropes holding her down. Cain elbowed Dean in the head, and he stumbled away, but the demon wasn't done. He punched Dean in the head again and again until his right eye was swollen shut and his lip was split, dripping blood down his face along with the cut on his cheek. Dean was doubled over against the wall, and he could tell from the agony in his stomach and the way every breath hurt that all of the demon's beating had bruised if not broken a couple ribs, and severely damaged his stomach.

Julie screamed horrible words at Cain as he grabbed Dean by the hair and threw him roughly to the ground. Dean lay on his side, coughing weakly, as Cain walked calmly over and retrieved the First Blade. Julie felt a wave of horror and fear pass through her as the Knight of Hell grinned, his eyes suddenly going all black. The father of murder reunited with the most powerful, evil weapon at his disposal, and the man she loved lying hurting and defenseless at his feet.

Cain walked smugly over to Dean and rolled him onto his back with the toe of his boot. The Knight planted a boot on Dean's chest, holding him down, and the hunter glared weakly up at the demon with his good eye.

"At first I thought you were a fool for coming here and fighting me, Dean," Cain said slowly. "But now I realize…perhaps it was wise. If you keep fighting and killing, you'll eventually end up becoming like me, and that's a horrible thought for you. And if my fellow Knights ever get their hands on you, you'll wish you were never born. So perhaps it really was wise to come to me."

"What are you talking about? What are you going to do to him?" Julie cried.

Cain lowered the First Blade to hold it to Dean's throat, and his good eye widened slightly. "I'm going to do the kindest thing I can for him. I'm going to kill him."


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter Thirty-Three**

"Wait!" Julie half-sobbed as the demon pulled back the First Blade to drive into the heart of the man she loved. "Please, don't!"

For some reason, Cain hesitated slightly. Maybe because of the pure desperation in her voice. Maybe just to make it hurt more when he killed Dean. "And why not, girl?" he snapped.

"Please…he doesn't deserve this," she whispered, trying and failing not to cry. "Don't kill him, please…I _love _him…"

That shouldn't change anything. He was a demon. A Knight of Hell, for Christ's sake, and one under the influence of the Mark of Cain and the First Blade! He should just laugh and murder Dean, but the demon hesitated.

Cain looked down, shaking his head. "Why is it that the best women always seem to fall for the pathetic mistakes like us?" the Knight asked Dean, and Julie was shocked. Dean had said things along the lines of that so many times she had sworn she would hit him if he ever said something like that again. And here was a Knight of Hell who felt the same way…

"You don't have to do this," Julie whispered. "Please…don't hurt him. He doesn't deserve this."

"You're right, I'm sure he doesn't," Cain sighed. "No one deserves this Mark. But you, girl…you don't understand. I'm doing your Dean a kindness if I kill him now."

"What are you talking about?" she cried.

"I know how this works," Cain said coldly. "I've been down the same path as he is now. The Mark and the Blade…they will twist him, make him do things he would never have imagined possible. He'll start to kill more, mostly monsters, and then he'll start to just kill everything that gets in his way. Eventually, that pet demon of his, Crowley, will do something to get on his bad side and Dean will end him. He might feel a bit bad, but it was the right thing to do, wasn't it, Dean?"

Dean glared up at the demon, trying to pretend he hadn't thought down this path himself. And there were more deaths down this path, far more painful than Crowley's.

"And then one day, things will be going very poorly, and the angel, Castiel, will get in your way, and it'll happen so fast you don't even know you're doing it until the angel is dead, and his blood is staining your hands, boy," Cain spat, and his words were so vivid and his eyes so haunted, Dean knew he must be speaking from experience.

"You're wrong," Julie snapped. "He would never."

"Things will be bad after you've killed him," Cain said slowly, his eyes on Dean. "You'll feel so dirty, so evil…and it will _hurt_." Dean wondered what close friend Cain must have murdered to be speaking so personally about it. "And they'll just keep getting worse. You'll want to end your life, but if you do, you'll just come back, and worse than before. Trust me, boy, I know."

Cain's eyes were glassy and distant, and there was a growing pain in them. "And then one day, she'll get in your way. You'll try not to, you'll do everything you can not to, and it won't be enough. One little mistake, that's all it will take, and then she'll be dead, _her, _and you'll be the one who killed her."

Dean knew who the demon was speaking of now, but the thought of him doing to Julie what Cain had once done to Colette…it was horrible. He couldn't. Wouldn't.

"But nothing will hurt as bad as that one death," the father of murder said darkly, and Dean's heart sank. There was only one person left, only one person who mattered enough that their death could possibly hurt more than Julie's…

"The one kill that will destroy you. The one that will seal your fate as a monster forever. For me it was the first, but for you it will be the last. That's the plan for you, Dean, and if I don't kill you now, that's how it will end." The demon met his eyes as he said slowly and coldly, "You _will _kill your brother. Sam will die at your hands, the one thing you've always feared the most, and the one thing you've always known would happen."

"No," Dean choked out. "Never."

"Unless I save you now, that's how it ends, boy," Cain said coldly. "So what will it be? I'll let you choose, Dean. I can hand you and this girl to Beelzebub, and you can go down that path, or I can kill you now and spare you from that future."

"Stop it!" Julie cried. "Leave him alone! Just let us go, please-"

Cain's face twisted in anger as he removed his boot from Dean and whirled around. He waved his hand and a rag flew from his table to force itself into Julie's mouth, effectively gagging her. She struggled to get words out for a couple of seconds, and then she finally just gave up and glared at the demon.

He turned away from her and back to Dean Winchester and found the dangerous man somehow back on his feet, staring the Knight right in the eye.

Before Cain could even try to fight, Dean drove his angel blade, which he must have found on the ground, into Cain's heart. The demon wailed in agony, and Dean pulled his knife free and cut a huge gash in Cain's sword arm. Cain dropped the First Blade and Dean hit the demon across the head, knocking him to the ground.

Dean scooped up the First Blade and felt a surge of much-needed strength fill him, helping him forget his extensive injuries for a moment. He had barely had the strength to get up and stab Cain without the Blade. And now, with it…

Cain slowly pushed himself up off of the ground and onto his knees. The demon met Dean's eyes almost sadly. Gripping the First Blade tightly, Dean choked out, "Please, just stop. Just tell me you'll stop. Say you'll stop working with the Knights. Say you'll help us kill them. Please."

Cain just shook his head. "I was you, once, son. I hadn't killed them yet. The best friend, the lover, the brother. If I was still that man…perhaps I would help you. But it's too late for me. It's too late. Just kill me."

Dean fought back a wave of nausea. "No. Please. Don't make me do this. Say you'll _stop_. Don't make me…" He had to stop talking because his lips were trembling nearly as badly as his hands.

Cain shook his head a little, smiling sadly at Dean. "You promised me, boy. You promised me when I gave you that Mark that you would do this when the time came. Well, the time is now, Dean. It's me or you."

Dean shook his head. "If you had just left her out of it…"

"I know," Cain said, still smiling slightly. "If it had just been the two of us, you would have been happy to die, wouldn't you? It would have been easier. But this is how your story goes, isn't it? You'll kill me, and then the demon and the angel and then her and then-"

Cain stopped talking abruptly, which wasn't surprising considering he no longer had a head.

Julie stared at Dean in shock and, though she hated to admit it, horror. He stood there shakily, ignoring the bruises and cuts and the pain as he realized what he had done. This kill left him with a different sort of feeling. He felt the initial rush of strength and joy at the kill, but then he felt something sick and dark building in him, threatening to choke him. For a second, Dean was terrified the darkness was going to swallow him and obliterate him. It weighed him down, and for a moment everything was too much, and he thought he might pass out.

Julie felt tears come to her eyes at the absolute terror in Dean's eyes. She had no idea what must be going on inside him after killing the giver of the Mark, but it clearly wasn't good. She wanted nothing more to hold him…and to run from him.

Dean turned to face Julie and he stumbled over to her. Hand trembling, he put the First Blade down on Cain's table. Then he reached out and undid Julie's gag, trying to ignore the way she flinched when he reached for her.

Once the gag was out of her mouth, Julie wanted to speak, but there was nothing she could think to say. "Dean…" she whispered after a long, weighted moment.

He couldn't meet her eyes as he instead cut her ankles and wrists free. As soon as she was free, she stood up and put her arms around Dean, holding him as tightly as she could with his wounds. Dean closed his eyes and let out a long, shuddering breath, for once allowing his guard to come down and just enjoying her touch.

Dean instantly regretted letting his guard down as the tears came. He tried to fight them off, but Julie wasn't disgusted by him like he expected. She stroked the back of his head and sank to her knees with him when he couldn't stand anymore. She held him tightly, not speaking, until the fear and sorrow passed enough for him to at least stop the silent tears going down his face.

"Castiel," Julie whispered after a long time, and Dean was confused until she continued, "Cas, please, come back. We're alive but Dean needs healing."

Dean wished she hadn't said that, because not even ten seconds later, Sam was busting down the door of Cain's home, gun at the ready, prepared to kill whatever had hurt his brother. Cas was right behind him, angel blade out.

Both of them stopped when they saw the sight before them: a battered, beaten, bloody Dean leaning into Julie for comfort, and Cain's corpse only a couple feet away, his head completely separated from his body.

"Dean," Sam gasped, understanding what must have happened instantly. He rushed to his brother's side, and Julie let Dean go so that Sam could hold him as well.

Dean fell forward, knowing Sam would be there to catch him, and Sam quickly caught his brother and held him tightly, trying to ignore the fear in him. Dean was not okay. That was clear from the blood and bruises on him, but also the hollowness and fear in his eyes. And Sam wanted nothing more than to be able to take the pain and darkness from Dean, but he couldn't. All he could do was hold him.

Castiel eyed the corpse of the father of murder, trying to ignore what it was going to mean for Dean now that he had killed the demon who had given the Mark in the first place. He loved his friend dearly, and he believed in Dean more than he had ever believed in anyone, angel or human. But the darkness that was in him now, after killing Cain himself…that was going to be almost impossible to come back from.

Eventually, Sam released his brother and Cas stepped forward. He touched Dean's forehead tenderly, and when he removed his hand, the man no longer bore the signs of a beating.

In fact, you would never know what had happened if it weren't for the corpse nearby and the darkness and pain in Dean's eyes.

"We should get out of here," Julie said quickly as Sam helped Dean to his feet. "Beelzebub or another demon could be here any second."

Cas nodded and laid a hand on each of the Winchesters' shoulders. Julie took Dean's hand, and just like that, they were gone.

* * *

><p>"Get him here," Beelzebub growled, trying to contain his anger.<p>

The terrified demon standing next to him nodded quickly and vanished. Beelzebub let out his breath slowly, staring at the corpse at his feet. The blood coming from Cain's severed head was still warm, which meant they hadn't been gone along. Beelzebub had just missed finally getting his hands on Dean Winchester, and it was even more frustrating now that he was on the brink of succumbing to the Blade after this kill. It wouldn't have taken long to torture the man into submission and get him to finally fulfill Beelzebub's plans, but the angel, Castiel, must have somehow gotten here and saved the man just before Beelzebub got here.

The monstrous man in the kitchen nudged a chair with his toe, eying the sawed-through ropes scattered around it. "Wonder who Cain had tied up here?" he asked.

Beelzebub rolled his eyes. The hulking, dark-skinned, muscle-bound man that his fellow Knight was possessing pretty much summed him up: powerful, dangerous, intimidating, and thick-headed.

"My guess? Juliet," the king of the Knights sighed. "Cain was pretty clear when we spoke with him he would not be giving Sam to us as well, probably trying to make up for what he did to his own brother…but I'm sure Juliet wouldn't allow Dean to be alone with Cain."

"Juliet…the girl who went to hell for the one with the Mark?" the other Knight said slowly, turning to face him.

"Yes," Beelzebub sighed, irritated. "It's not hard, brother. Castiel is the angel, Sam the younger brother, Dean the one we want, and Juliet the pretty little toy I would really like to have back. You would like her, Behemoth. She's small, and you would think that would make her breakable, but she's very strong. You would enjoy seeing how long it takes to break her. If this works, then I think I'll let you have her for a bit."

The demon grinned, baring his teeth. "Sounds fun. But I think I'd prefer the one with the Mark. He sounds like he would be the hardest to break."

Beelzebub rolled his eyes. Asmodeus wouldn't have complained about being given a chance to have his way with Julie Carters. He would have been grateful, and enjoyed every second of it. But Behemoth always wanted more, and was never satisfied no matter how much Beelzebub rewarded him. Beelzebub didn't feel guilty about giving Asmodeus up to die, but he did sometimes regret not picking one of his other even more pathetic siblings. At least Asmodeus was fun to have around!

"I told you, if this plan works, you will not be fighting against Dean Winchester any longer!" the Knight of Hell snapped at his larger, dimmer brother.

"Do I at least get the brother?" Behemoth muttered moodily.

"I suppose you could," Beelzebub conceded. "At least for a while. You'd have to actually use the spells that keep them alive while you torture him, though. We'll need him for Lucifer when we reach that stage."

"Right," Behemoth chuckled. At least the two Knights had this one thing in common: they both worshipped their lord and master. Other Knights, like Abbadon and, to a lesser degree, Apollyon and Adramalech, feared and distrusted their lord. Asmodeus hadn't been a huge fan of the true master either, but Behemoth had no reason not to worship Lucifer. Lucifer had always been fond of his little pet disaster, and he had always enjoyed sending Behemoth into a town to wreak havoc and massacre God's pet humans. And Beelzebub was his most trusted servant, so both Knights had nothing to fear from bringing Lucifer back. And Beelzebub hoped that one day, and one day soon, he could raise his lord again.

But at the moment, he had other plans. And one of the most instrumental pieces in that plan appeared in the doorway of Cain's home, frowning.

"You called, my lord?" Crowley asked carefully, eying Behemoth. He hadn't met this Knight of Hell yet, and he was rumored to be volatile and dangerous. Crowley knew right away this was not the demon to piss off.

"There's been a change in plans," Beelzebub said darkly. "Cain did his job and found Dean Winchester."

Crowley noticed the corpse of the father of the murder on the ground, and his frown deepened. For one thing, he hadn't known that Cain was looking for Dean. He thought it was the other way around. Clearly, Beelzebub was being wise and wasn't telling Crowley everything. But Cain was very clearly dead, and the only thing that could kill a Knight of Hell, or rather the only person, was Dean, and if he had killed Cain, that was bad news for the man.

"Oh?" Crowley said carefully. "And how is that a change in plans?"

"It's what happened _after _he captured Dean Winchester that has derailed our plans slightly," Beelzebub sighed. "It was my plan to have Cain hand him over to me so that I could make sure he succumbs to the Blade and fulfills our plans. I'm not a patient demon, and I'm tired of waiting for him to grow weak. But Dean managed to escape, so that plan is out. However, it appears that our dear Mr. Winchester may have accidentally done our job for us."

Crowley tried to keep his voice and expression neutral as he asked, "And how is that? If he escaped, you can't control him."

"Killing Cain was the last straw," Beelzebub said confidently. "Dean will be so far gone now that we don't have to wait for him to give in. I say we end our plans a little early, take the choice away from him."

Crowley knew exactly what the demon was talking about, and while that was his final goal for Dean as well, he wasn't quite prepared for things to end this quickly. Oh well. Dean had to let go at some point. If it was the next day or the next year, what did it matter?

"How do you plan on doing this?" Crowley asked carefully.

Beelzebub glanced at Behemoth, who was grinning evilly. "That's where you come in, my friend…" the king of the Knights said darkly, and Crowley resisted the urge to gulp.

* * *

><p>"Juliet?"<p>

Julie sighed. "Julie," Jasper's voice corrected quickly. "I guess that means it's you and not Sam, then?"

"Yeah, it's me," Julie said softly, settling down onto the couch in the living room of the bunker. She resisted the urge to curl up into a ball and cry, just letting the comforting voice of her uncle wash over her. But no. She had to be strong. Sam was staying strong, and Dean was doing his very best to. If they could, she could too.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" Jasper asked in such a gentle, fatherly tone that Julie had to dig her palm into her eyes to fight back tears. God, she was acting stupid. She was twenty-eight years old, and at the moment, all she wanted was to be back at home so her uncle could hold her in his arms and treat her like a little girl.

"I…" Julie stopped and tried to get her emotions under control. "Dean…"

"Oh god," he breathed. "Oh, sweetheart…what happened? Is he…?"

"No!" she said quickly. "No, he's not dead. He just…we've had a really rough past day or so."

"What happened?" Jasper repeated, concerned.

"Well…you know how things have been rough for Dean lately, with the Mark and the Blade and everything?"

"I'm aware."

"Well…last night, Cas took us to Cain."

"_What? _Cain as in…Cain and Abel? The Knight of Hell, father of murder…that guy?" Jasper sounded _pissed._

"That's the one," Julie sighed, ready to be scolded.

"Juliet, how could you do that? That's extremely dangerous! You could have gotten hurt, you could have gotten killed-"

"Almost did," she said flatly. "Cas and Sam were forced to leave Dean and I behind, and Cain tried to sell us out to Beelzebub." Her uncle tried to interrupt, but she plowed ahead. "Then Cain beat the shit out of Dean and tied me to a chair and was about to kill Dean when he got the upper hand. Dean ended up having to kill him, and now…"

Her voice broke. She could imagine Jasper shaking his head on the other end of the line. "Julie…god, I wish you would just come home. I wish I could just hide you, keep you safe. I should never have let you go."

"You couldn't have stopped me," Julie pointed out. "Besides, Dean needs me now more than I need to be safe. Hiding me isn't going to keep me safe, either. So don't worry about me, Uncle Jasper."

"Right, because that's going to happen," her uncle smirked bitterly. After a moment, he asked, "Is there any way I can help?"

"I don't think so," she confessed. "Look, Jasper…I love you, and I miss you, and I wish I could come see you and Tay. And I could use a break from this, but…I can't. Dean…he needs me right now. And things are only going to get worse. I'll call as much as I can, but…"

She stopped, and she and her uncle both sighed. "You take care of that man, you hear me? But don't let anything to happen to you or Sam, either."

"I won't," Julie sighed. She quickly changed the subject, and they talked about other things, mostly about Jasper and Taylor's lives. After a while, though, she knew Dean would be needing her. She sighed, "Look, Jasper…I should go."

"Alright. I'll talk to you later, then. And Juliet…" Julie let that one time go, because they were both so emotional at the moment. "I love you."

"Love you too," she whispered. "Bye, Uncle Jasper."

She hung up and put her head in her hands for a long time. She wanted nothing more than to sleep until she had the strength to face the hell her life was quickly becoming. Cas had to go hours ago, back to his angels, and Sam had been with Dean for two or three hours straight so that she could rest, and she was certain Sam was needing some rest now himself. It was already dark out, and she had spent the day worrying about Dean and trying to sleep off the horrors she had seen last night.

Sure enough, when she walked into Sam's bedroom and saw the two brothers watching TV, Sam looked mere seconds away from drifting off, while Dean's eyes were wide and haunted.

"Hey," she said casually, and Sam jumped, wide awake again. "Sorry, I just needed a little nap. I'm back now, and wide awake. Unlike you, Sam. You should get some rest." Sam hesitated and glanced at Dean, who looked a little uncertain as well. "Dean, why don't you and I hang out in our room, let Sam get some rest?"

Dean shrugged and got up. Sam nodded gratefully at Julie, and she did the same. Julie and Dean left the room, but as soon as Dean shut the door, he turned to face Julie.

"You guys don't have to babysit me," he said flatly. "I'll be okay. If you both just need to rest, I'll be fine on your own."

"I got my rest," Julie assured him. "And we don't _want _you to be alone. Now come on. I feel like we haven't just hung out the two of us for a while."

"Well, we have, but it's always been really hard because I'm about to lose control, go psycho, and kill you in your sleep," Dean muttered.

Julie sighed. "Come on," she said, taking Dean's hand and dragging him back to their bedroom. They lay down on the bed, too tired to get under the covers, and Julie settled in next to Dean, her head on his chest. He gave in and wrapped his arms around her, settling into the comfortable position they often lay in.

Julie rubbed the sore muscles in his upper arm, and he sighed. She was very careful to stay far away from the Mark of Cain, afraid to upset it, or its bearer. But she was concerned, and a bit curious.

"Jasper called," she said after a while.

"And?"

"He's worried about you, but what else is new. He told us to stay safe, told me to take care of you."

"I don't need to be taken care of!" Dean snapped.

"Well, I'm going to anyway," she said firmly. "Sam and I, and Cas when he's free, we're all going to help you, Dean. We _want _to."

"It's not safe," he said after a minute. "You heard Cain. He ended up killing everyone: his brother, his wife, apparently his best friend, too. You guys aren't safe around me."

"Who said he's right?" Julie countered.

"He had that mark for thousands of years, I've had it for two," Dean said flatly. "I've held out this long, and that's something, but pretty soon it's going to get too strong. I can just tell. And I don't want you three anywhere near me when that happens."

Julie had nothing to say to that. She wanted to ask how badly killing Cain had affected him for the past twenty-four hours, but she also didn't want to make things worse. So she decided on distracting him.

"Well, I've got some non-Mark related news," she said brightly. "You remember my ex-boyfriend, James?"

"That ray of sunshine? Hard to forget," Dean muttered.

"Well, he's hunting with Jasper and Taylor now."

"And is that good news of bad news?"

"Just news. They could use some extra muscle, and he's helping Taylor actually become a real hunter and not a half-ass one. Mostly, they hunt with him because their hunts have been getting more and more dangerous. Seems like the Knights have gotten evil excited, and monsters are getting a little kill-crazy. And there's more demons on earth than there have been in years. Apparently, Crowley's lost all of his followers, so every demon we come across will be trying to give us to Beelzebub."

"Good to know," Dean sighed. "Is that including Crowley?"

"I don't think so," Julie admitted. "I know it's really freaking stupid, but for some reason I kind of trust him not to hand us over to them. Mostly because he's missed several opportunities to already, but also because…he really seems to care about you, and Sam, at least a little bit. Enough to risk his own life playing the double agent to help us."

"I have a harder time trusting him than you do," Dean said darkly. "You've only known him when he was almost tolerable, but there have been times when he's tried to kill us or those close to us…times he's betrayed us…times Cas has betrayed us, too. And, now that I think about it, I've betrayed Sammy time and time again, and vice versa. So congrats, Jules! You're the only one of us who hasn't betrayed the others. Other than that little stunt with tricking me into using the Blade again, but that was mostly Crowley, so…"

Julie sighed. "I'm still not going to apologize for that," she said flatly. "I do wish it didn't have to come to that, but you couldn't die then. Or ever, as far as I'm concerned."

"You don't regret that? Not even after seeing what I'm going to become?"

"You're not going to become that," Julie said firmly. "Never."

Dean sighed. "Did I ever tell you the reason Cain killed his brother?"

"Well…no. But biblically, he was jealous and so he killed him, and then God cursed him-"

"Not exactly," Dean interrupted her. "If what Cain said is true, and as far as I know, he's never lied to me, then apparently Abel was talking with Lucifer and not God. Lucifer was tricking Abel and planned on turning him into his pet, basically, and Cain made a deal with the devil: his soul in hell for his brother's in heaven. Lucifer made him be the one who killed Abel and put him in heaven, though." Dean took a deep breath, steadying himself. "Sound familiar?"

"Dean, you sold your soul to bring Sam back to life, not to kill him and send him to heaven," Julie said carefully. "And Sam would never work with Lucifer, anyway."

Dean laughed bitterly. "Already has. Granted, he did it to save the world and stop the apocalypse, but he's said yes once, and he might again, if he has to. All I know is, while I was here on earth and my brother was down in the pit getting taken apart by Lucifer, I would have done anything to take his place." Dean's green eyes burned into her. "What about that makes me any different from Cain? And if, as a human, he was just like me, who's to say I won't end up the same as him?"

"Me," Julie said firmly. "And Sam, and Cas, and anyone who knows you. That could never be you. You would never kill people like him, good people."

Dean sighed tiredly. "I don't know, Jules. I just don't know anymore."

"_I_ do!" she said firmly, sitting up. "You're too good to ever become like that."

"Nice to know someone believes that," Dean muttered.

Julie felt so truly awful for Dean. He wouldn't believe any of the things she said about him being good, and she didn't know how to help him. The best she could do now was distract him.

Julie turned on the small, rather crappy television in their room and they sat and watched dumb TV shows, making fun of them, until exhaustion overwhelmed Dean and he finally fell asleep. Julie carefully got the covers out from underneath him and tucked him in. He stirred slightly but didn't wake. After all, he hadn't slept in over a day, and he hadn't since the ordeal with Cain. If Dean needed one thing, it was sleep.

Julie settled down next to him. She was afraid to close her eyes, knowing she would see the same nightmares of a black-eyed Dean tearing into Crowley, then Cas, and then finally her and Sam that had haunted her during her earlier nap. She pressed as close to Dean as she could, trying to soak up his warmth and solidness. But he wasn't as warm as usual. In fact he felt a little cold and clammy.

She tried not to worry, and after a while, Julie drifted off. She had a couple nightmares, but no more than usual. Just sleeping next to Dean was enough to fight off the worst of them. For the most part, she slept peacefully through the night.

But she woke in terror that morning as Dean began to twitch and moan in his sleep. His skin was soaked in a cold sweat, and the veins were sticking out of his throat as he strained against an invisible force. "Dean!" Julie cried, not bothering to be gentle as she shook him. "_Dean_!"

He jolted straight up in bed, eyes wide and scared. Julie stayed a respectful distance away from him until Dean slowly realized he wasn't in whatever nightmare he'd been trapped in before. Once he was calmer, she moved closer to him and gently leaned into him, putting her arms around him.

It took a long time for Dean to get his breaths steady and hug Julie back. "Sorry about that," he muttered after quite a while.

"Are you okay?" Julie asked him gently.

"Just a nightmare. I should be used to them by now." Of course, he didn't often have nightmares about stabbing an angel knife into Cas again and again until the angel couldn't cry out because he was past dead. His nightmares didn't usually contain him stalking a terrified Julie through the bunker until he cornered her and tied her to a chair and beat her to death. And they almost never had him driving the First Blade into Sammy's heart and then laughing as the light went out of his little brother's eyes.

Julie touched the side of his face, and he had to resist the urge to flinch away from her touch. How could she look at him with concern and love in those blue eyes? Didn't she know what he was going to end up doing to her if someone didn't kill him first?!

"Can I help?" she asked.

_You can run. You can take Sam and you can run as far away from this monster as you can get. You can forget about me and try to stay safe._

"Distract me," he whispered.

Julie smiled ever-so-slightly and got out from under the covers with Dean. She gently pushed him back against the head of the bed and kissed him. Sweetly, at first, and then more hungrily when he grabbed her hips and held her tightly. God, she was sexy, and he wanted her _bad_.

Her hands slid slowly from his face down his chest to the hem of his shirt. She started to pull it off, and an animal desire rose up in Dean. Julie laughed breathlessly as he rolled over, so she was the one with her back against the head of the bed.

_Well, that worked_, Julie thought with a self-satisfied smirk as Dean ran his hands over her, kissing her neck. He seemed _very _distracted.

Dean pulled her tank top and bra strap off of one of shoulders and kissed it, his hands sliding over her to the top of her jeans. Julie was starting to get really turned on, and he was too, clearly. She pulled at his t-shirt again, trying to get it over his head, as he started to unbutton her jeans.

Dean suddenly changed directions so quickly Julie though she might get whiplash. He forgot about unbuttoning her jeans and instead kissed her on the mouth until he was lightheaded. He wanted her _so bad_.

Julie was pleasantly surprised by this turn of events. She had feared that after what Cain had said, Dean would be afraid to be with her, afraid he would hurt her. But now it seemed like all he wanted was to be with her, to have her, and she sure as hell was not going to complain!

Julie pushed herself off of the head of the bed so she could kiss him back better. Dean gripped her shoulders tightly, clinging onto her, afraid to lose her.

She suddenly quit kissing him back. Why did she do that? What did it matter? All he wanted was her, and he didn't really care if she didn't really want him at the moment.

"Dean, stop," Julie said, and in some small corner in the back of his mind, he was confused. Then she winced and cried, "Dean, let me go! You're hurting me!"

But he wasn't listening anymore, couldn't listen. Julie struggled against Dean, trying to ignore the building panic in her. She had felt a lot of things in bed with Dean, but never fear. But right now, he was scaring her. He was gripping her shoulders so tightly that it _hurt_, and she was reminded of how dangerously strong he was. This had been fun a moment ago, but now she was getting scared, and he wouldn't _stop_.

"Dean, _stop!_" Julie cried, trying to pull free of him.

He couldn't even hear her though. Dean meant to press her up against the head of the bed and kiss her until she forgot her hesitations, but something was wrong with him. He was too strong, and he didn't realize it until it happened. He had only meant to press her back against the head of the bed—that was all! But instead, he practically slammed her backwards, and her head cracked loudly on the wood.

Julie cried out in pain and lay there, dazed. But her pained scream was enough to snap Dean out of whatever primal instinct had taken it over. For a moment, he was confused, and then he saw the bruises forming on Julie's bare shoulders and the dull pain in her eyes.

Oh, god. _Oh, god_. He _hurt _her!

Slowly, Julie's head cleared and she sat up, forcing herself not to wince. She stared at Dean for a moment and saw the guilt and horror in his eyes.

"Dean-" she started, but he got up and stumbled away.

"Oh, god, I'm…I'm so sorry…" he choked out, backing away.

Julie started to get up. "Dean, wait!" she cried, but it was too late.

He was gone.


	34. Chapter 34

**Author's Note: **Once again, thank you all for the support for this story! It's wonderful to see that people actually enjoy my writing. A word about these next couple chapters: the Mark of Cain storyline, which had been developing for a long time, will finally be coming to a climax. I'm very excited about where this is going and I hope you all are too. In the next couple of chapters you may see a few similarities with a previous Supernatural episode, but that is because I've thought a lot about how to resolve this storyline and I think this is the only and best way to do so. I hope you all enjoy and I promise I will definitely not just be following the show, but doing a lot of original things with this.

**Chapter Thirty-Four**

Julie tried not to wince as she studied the bruises his hands had left on her. He hadn't meant to. She kept telling herself that. Once Dean snapped out of it and she saw the horror in his eyes, it was clear Dean hadn't even realized he was hurting her.

She wasn't sure if that soothed her or scared her even more.

There were few things in life more unpleasant than going from pleasure to fear and pain as quickly as she had. While Julie had been worried a few times over the past few weeks that the First Blade may overwhelm Dean and he might attempt to hurt her, she had never thought even for a second that it would have happened at a time like that. She had always felt safe with Dean, always known there was no way he would ever hurt her…but if he kept losing control like that, she could end up with a whole lot worse than a few bruises and a lump on the back of her head.

Julie pushed those thoughts away. No, it wouldn't be like that. It was clear Dean felt awful for hurting her, and he would never do it again. They could work through this, she knew they could. She just had to find him.

Julie changed into fresh clothes, making sure to select a low-cut grey t-shirt that covered the bruises on her shoulders. Just to be safe, she found a dark green hunting jacket and pulled that on before going to find Dean.

It didn't take too long to find him. He hadn't gone far, just to the nearest bathroom. He had stood in there, staring at his own pale, haggard face in the mirror until he got everything under control. His hands finally quite trembling and he got his breaths even.

He had _hurt _her! That thought wouldn't leave his head, accompanied by the fear and pain in her eyes as she stared up at him. He hadn't even realized what he was doing to her until he heard that sharp crack and heard her scream. If he hadn't snapped out of it then…who knows what else he might have done to Julie?!

There was a soft knock on the bathroom door. Dean stiffened, knowing who it would be. Her. Always her, always so gentle and patient and kind and forgiving and loving. He didn't deserve that, didn't deserve her. Or Sam, with his constant support and his blind faith in his big brother. The way those two, and Cas as well, believed in him, still believed he was good after everything he'd done…how could anyone have so much faith in him? He was a mess, a monster, and they just kept forgiving him.

One of these days, it was going to get them killed. That was his worst fear.

"Dean?" Julie asked, concerned, and he realized he was clutching the counter tightly, his breaths coming in short spurts again. "Are you in there?"

Dean slowed his breathing, trying to slow the frantic pounding in his chest. "Dean, honey, are you…are you okay?"

_Honey_. God. He would never have let anyone call him that, except maybe Lisa. But he wasn't the type of guy you called honey and asked if he was okay. He was the kind of guy who marched into battle and came out hours later, the only survivor, caked in blood, dead inside. _That_ was Dean Winchester. Not some nice, good guy who could make her happy, that she could live a long, happy life with, calling each other honey and sleeping peacefully in the same bed. Why couldn't she see that, why couldn't she pick someone better?

"Dean, do you need help?"

_Yes._

"I'm fine," he got out, releasing the counter and straightening up.

Julie snorted. "No, you're not. Now would you quit trying to be a tough guy and talk to me?"

"I'm not trying to be a 'tough guy,'" he said through gritted teeth. "I'm trying to keep you safe."

Julie was silent for a moment. Then she said calmly, "Dean, open the door."

"Julie, you're not safe around me! What if I lose control, what if I do worse than just make you hit your head?"

But she just said in the same calm, firm tone, "Dean, open the door."

God, she was stupid. Stupid and stubborn, and she must have a death wish if she really wanted to be alone with him right now. But god, did he love her.

Dean unlocked the bathroom door, and Julie studied him for a moment. She took a step towards him, and when he didn't flinch away, she moved forward and wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly. Dean was afraid to hug her back and hurt her yet again.

"You're okay," Julie whispered into his chest.

"It's not me I'm worried about!" Dean snapped. "I'm not the one who got hurt."

Julie pulled away to look at him. "I'm fine, Dean. Really. That was _nothing_. You've got to try a lot harder than that to hurt _me_." Then she sobered. "Besides…I'm pretty sure that hurt you a lot more than it hurt me."

Dean shook his head. "Why aren't you scared of me?" he snapped. "Do you _want _to die?!"

"I'm not scared of you because I trust you, and I know you'd never hurt me on purpose," she said calmly. "And I do not want to die. And I'm not worried about you killing me because I know you won't."

"But Cain-"

"Didn't know you like I do," Julie said firmly. "Sam and Cas and I, we all believe in you. You can do this. You can get the Blade under control, and you can fight it. We'll just have to be more careful. But you're not killing anyone."

She was wrong, about everything she had just said, except for the blind, stupid faith she and his brother and best friend all had in him. But Dean nodded to make Julie happy and hugged her back gingerly, taking extra caution not to hurt her.

Dean returned to their bedroom and changed into fresh clothes, trying to ignore how prominent the Mark of Cain was on his arm. It was getting a little more raised and red every day as its hold on him increased, but he did his best to hide it under long-sleeved shirts so the others wouldn't worry.

Dean and Julie walked out of their bedroom and into the main hall of the bunker just in time to hear someone banging on the front door. They exchanged concerned looks, and then Sam blew past them.

"This asshole will not stop knocking!" he grumbled, climbing the stairs to the door to the bunker.

"I can hear you!" a familiar, surly voice snarled through the door.

Dean and Julie exchanged another look at the demon's voice.

"What do you want, Crowley?" Sam snapped.

"To not be stuck outside with this awkward angel of yours a second longer!" Crowley snapped back through the door.

"Cas?" Sam called.

"Sam, I would much appreciate being let in," the angel said carefully. "I have been stuck out here for nearly five minutes with Crowley and I'm not sure I can bear another moment alone with him without stabbing him."

Sam smirked slightly as he quickly undid the several locks on the enchanted bunker door. He barely got out of the way before a demon and an angel pushed past him and stepped into the bunker. Sam shut the door as they bickered.

"You could not stab me if you _wanted, _Castiel," the former king of hell said testily.

"I _do _want to, and I easily could."

"I'd kill you first."

"As promising as that fight sounds, I think we have more important issues at hand." The angel glanced over at Dean, who stood on the ground floor, staring up at him.

"You know, you standing there worrying about your boyfriend gets really annoying sometimes," Crowley snapped at the angel.

Castiel frowned. "Sam is not my boyfriend. And while I _am_ worried about Dean, he is Julie's boyfriend, not mine."

"I was _joking_, you absolute _moron_!"

"Someone's in an especially bad mood today," Sam muttered, carefully avoiding stepping within arm's reach of the testy demon. He led the demon and angel down the stairs to stand next to Dean and Julie.

Crowley shot Sam a look. "It's all your brother's fault, you know. You just _had _to kill Cain and ruin everything, didn't you?"

Dean looked at the ground, and Cas and Sam both bristled. "He didn't have a choice!" Sam snapped. "Cain would have killed him otherwise."

"No, Cain would have given him over to Beelzebub, although that wouldn't be in line with my plans, either," the demon grumbled. He straightened his tie and regained his composure. "But forget about that. We've got bigger problems."

"Bigger than the Mark and the Blade getting even stronger?" Julie asked incredulously, and Dean stiffened.

"Yes."

"How much bigger?" Sam asked nervously.

"Metatron-big," Crowley said darkly.

"How do you know about his plan to attack?" Cas asked suspiciously.

"Beelzebub himself told me about his plans," the demon said almost smugly. "You're not the only one with an inside scoop, angel boy."

"Just because you're pretending to be a servant of a Knight of Hell, and therefore getting inside information, that does not make you my superior," Cas said coldly.

"Would you two quit it with the pissing contest and just explain what's going on?" Julie snapped, tired of this. She just wanted to know what the problem was so they could fix it and then she could work on making sure Dean would be okay.

"Metatron and his angels have made camp on earth in an abandoned warehouse," Castiel explained. "My angels tracked him there, but there is warding around the place keeping angels out. The good news is that he and his angels can't leave without getting back out, but they don't plan to leave for another couple of days, when they plan to begin the attack."

"What attack?" Dean asked, the first thing he'd said this whole time.

"So he does talk," Crowley muttered. "Beelzebub wants Metatron to be the one to officially begin their campaign to conquer the earth. In a little less than forty-eight hours, Metatron and his angels are going to begin to sweep the country from the west coast, killing and conquering, and the demons will sweep the east coast soon enough."

"Why now?" Sam asked. "And what's the end game? What will they get out of wiping out innocent humans?"

"My angels were able to capture one angel who accidentally crossed the border, and he confessed that the angels have been promised a chance to restore the earth to its former glory." Cas sighed. "But, of course, Beelzebub is lying. And he told them that they would have to rid the earth of sinful humans to create their new heaven on earth."

"Great," Sam muttered. "But why now? This alliance has been around for a while."

"Him," Crowley said calmly, nodding at Dean.

Cas, Sam, and Julie all stiffened and tried and failed not to turn and stare at Dean. He continued to stare at the ground. "What about him?" Sam snapped.

"Castiel was _given_ that angel that 'accidentally' stepped over the border so that he could find out what was going on," Crowley recited. "Then, according to Beelzebub's plans which, mind you, turned about to be accurate, he would come running to you and share the plan, and you would all go charging in to stop Metatron. Of course, the angels would be ready, and they would capture you all and take you to Beelzebub to be taken apart. Now, I don't know about you, but I don't think that sounds like much fun to me, but I might just be crazy…"

Julie swallowed. "Okay. Okay, so…what? We know what they plan to do to us, but that doesn't change the fact that we've still got to stop them."

"Right," Sam sighed. "So we make a plan. We know they'll be expecting us, so we have to somehow surprise them."

"My angels will fight with us," Castiel said firmly. "We can provide a diversion, and someone can get in there and kill Metatron."

"Excellent plan," Crowley said, and Julie could not for the life of her tell if he was being sarcastic or not. "I suggest sending him," the demon said, nodding at Dean.

"Why Dean?" Sam snapped. "Any of us could kill Metatron!"

"Well, first of all, Dean is our strongest fighter," Crowley pointed out. "With the Blade, he's nearly unstoppable, and you're going to need that against Metatron. He's been taking grace from Castiel's dying angels and giving it to himself, pumping him so full of angel juice that anyone other than the great Dean Winchester will have a hard time even standing a chance."

Julie frowned. "But we're saving the Blade for Knight-killing only."

"Why? To stop it from controlling him and turning him into a monster?" The demon's eyes were cold and almost cruel as he said, "Oh, come now, Juliet. You and I both know that's already happening. Besides, I'd consider this threat as bad as any Knight of Hell."

Sam and Julie both opened their mouths to object, but Dean said, "No. He's right. I'll fight Metatron, and I'll kill the bastard. Whatever toll it takes on me will be worth it to put that son of a bitch down for good."

"There's the Dean we know and love!" Crowley smirked. "Any objections?" Cas, Sam, and Julie all opened their mouths, but the demon said quickly, "Nope? Good."

"He's not going alone," Sam snapped, daring someone to challenge him. "I'll go with Dean, watch his back, help him make sure Metatron goes down."

"It won't be safe for you there, Sam," Dean said darkly.

"Then it's not safe for you, and you're not going either!"

Dean rolled his eyes, knowing better than to try to argue with his little brother on this. Sam had lost Dean far too many times to let him walk into this fight alone. "Fine. Sam will go with me."

Julie looked like she wanted to go as well, but she knew the two Winchesters' would be enough, and that Sam would watch out for Dean better than anyone. "And I can help you with the diversion, Cas."

The angel nodded. "I should contact Hannah. We should attack as soon as possible, in case they decide to begin their attack early."

The three hunters agreed, and Crowley said brightly, "Sounds good. Well, my work here is done. Hope you all survive!"

He turned to leave, and Sam snapped, "Where do you think you're going?"

"I did more than my job in warning you," Crowley snapped. "I helped you by risking my neck yet again, and I'm sure as hell not risking it again to save pathetic humans. I may be helping you, but I'm still a _demon_." His eyes settled on Dean, and for a moment, Julie could swear Crowley looked almost…sad. "Call me if any of you survive this, okay?"

He started to leave again, and Sam made a move to stop him, but Julie touched his arm. "Let him go," she muttered. "It's easier that way."

Crowley nodded once at Dean as he walked out, and an unspoken communication passed between them. And then the demon was out the door.

There was a long moment of silence as the four thought about what they were about to do. Then Dean sighed and said, "Alright. No use in putting it off. Let's get to work."

* * *

><p>Sam hated the way all of these angels were staring at him. Their eyes, which all had that spark of almost inhuman intelligence that Cas's had, followed him everywhere he went. He knew they were seeing a small remnant of Gadreel's grace in him, and they were curious about how that had happened. Most angels didn't know the story of how heaven's most wanted angel had escaped his prison, possessed Sam under the name of Ezekiel, and eventually joined Metatron, using Sam's body as a vessel to kill Kevin Tran and work for the evil angel until Cas, Dean, and Crowley were able to get Sam free. The angel had sort of redeemed himself in the end by helping them overthrow Metatron and killing himself to free Castiel from heaven's jail, but that didn't erase the memory of frying poor Kevin's brain from Sam's guilty conscience.<p>

Julie could tell something was bothering Sam as they got ready for battle alongside a couple dozen of Cas's best warriors. She never said anything about it, but Sam knew that she was picking up on his discomfort, because she hovered near him, keeping him busy preparing for battle and talking about insignificant things to distract him.

He was so grateful. There was so much riding on today, so many ways this could go wrong, and the last thing he needed to do was get hung up on past guilt and mistakes and let them distract him now. He was already worried about keeping Dean safe in the battle to come, and he couldn't be thinking about all the ways he had already failed his big brother.

Castiel and Hannah were off scoping out the old warehouse where Metatron and his followers (about twenty in number, according to Cas) were hiding. That left Dean, Julie, and Sam to keep an eye on twenty-four angels for a couple of hours in the Men of Letters bunker.

The angels seemed more curious about than suspicious of Sam, and they seemed rather indifferent about Julie. Some actually seemed to genuinely like her. She was the only one of the three hunters who had actually sat down and talked to a few angels, including good old Jonah, the angel that had once captured and tortured her and Sam to get to Castiel, but had chosen to join Cas and apparently stayed loyal. All of the angels who spoke to Julie seemed fascinated with her, and Sam noticed that her natural charm and likableness applied to angels as well as humans. It was impossible not to like Julie.

But these angels had no trouble distrusting Dean. They steered clear of him, and some even glared at him with varying levels of hatred. It was clear they still didn't trust him for the things he'd done to make them distrust him during the first civil war against Metatron, and many of them blamed him for everything that was going on, although it was ridiculous. Dean was doing the best he could!

Julie confessed to Sam what had happened between them last night, and Sam tried to hide his concern from Julie and failed miserably. "Listen…he's got it in his head that he's a monster and he can't be saved," Julie said darkly when she had finished her story. "I wouldn't be surprised if he refuses to use the First Blade, even if it means Metatron killing him. So just…promise me you'll take care of him?"

"Of course," Sam assured Julie, and they hugged for a long time. And Julie knew that there was no way Sam would ever let anything happen to his big brother.

But she still wasn't satisfied. So, when Cas and Hannah finally returned with a game plan and all of the angels went off to discuss the attack with them, Julie finally got a chance to talk to Dean alone.

The two of them went into kitchen, one of the only parts of the bunker the angels hadn't gone into, not needing food like humans. Dean tried to put off the conversation as long as possible, digging around in the fridge for something to eat, even though he wasn't hungry, and finally just popping open a beer and taking his time drinking it.

"Alright, enough stalling," Julie finally snapped, growing tired of his attempts to avoid what was coming. "Can we just talk about this?"

"Talk about what?" Dean said innocently.

Julie rolled her eyes. "The fact that you're going into battle against quite possibly the most powerful, evil angel alive today, and you and Sam will be in a lot of danger."

"It's not like we haven't been in worse situations," Dean shrugged. "And you'll be in danger, too."

"Yes, but I'm not the one who has tried to let himself die before. I'm not the one who thinks that I deserve to die, and the one who is going to see this as a perfect opportunity to get killed, thinking that will somehow protect the people he cares about."

"Oh, come on, Julie!" Dean snapped. "You don't think I'm that stupid?"

Julie didn't say anything, but her face said it all. Dean smirked slightly. "So you _do _think I'm stupid?"

"No! Well, yes, sometimes, but that's not the point. The point is…is don't do that, Dean! Promise me you're going to go into that fight and do everything you can to win."

Dean set down his beer and gently held Julie's arms, looking her in the eye. "I'm going to do everything I can to make sure Sam stays safe and that son of a bitch gets what he deserves."

Julie frowned. "You didn't promise anything about making it out alive."

Dean sighed. "Jules…look, I know you guys need me to kill the Knights of Hell, but…you've seen more than anyone how bad it is, how I'm losing the fight. Don't you think it'd be easier for my story to just end today?"

"How can you say that?!" she cried, upset and angry and scared by that thought.

"If I keep going and fighting and killing, I'm still going to die," Dean said coldly. "It'll just be different. All the good things in me, all the things you love…they'll die. I'll turn into some monster, and if someone doesn't stop me, I'll kill you and Cas and Sammy, like Cain said. And don't tell me I won't, Jules, just _don't_! That's how this ends, and I can't…I can't let you see that happen to me. I don't want to watch you quit loving me. God, I just…I can't become that…that _thing_!"

He was breaking down, and Julie thought she might cry. But now, now while he was being vulnerable and honest…now was when she had to say it.

"Stop it. Just…just stop." Dean looked up surprised at the harshness in her voice. Julie stared Dean straight in the eye in the hard voice of someone who was done playing nice.

"First of all, there is _nothing _that could ever make quit loving you, and I mean that. Nothing. If you became that thing we saw in the maze and tried to kill me and Cas and Sam…well, first of all, that wouldn't be you anymore. But that's not going to happen, you hear me? It's not, because you're strong, stronger than anyone. You're strong and you're good and you can do this. I know it, and Sam knows it, and Cas, and everyone else who really knows you. If you would just believe in yourself like everyone else who loves you, you would know that you can beat this thing."

"It's not about me believing in myself-" Dean started to snap.

"I'm not finished," Julie said sharply. "And I know it's not. But we'll find a cure. Because there is one, I'm sure of it, and we'll do anything to get it. Okay? We're going to help you, Dean, and all you have to do is let us. Because there's something that I know you haven't believed since…since long before I met you, but it's true. Look at me, Dean! Please, just look at me, and actually listen to me when I say this, because I've never meant anything as much as I mean what I'm about to say."

Dean raised his eyes from the ground and met Julie's eyes, shiny with tears, but dead serious. "You are a good man, Dean Winchester. You are good, and I love you, and you deserve to be saved."

Dean stared at Julie for a long time, to the point where she began to worry about him. Then he bent and kissed her gently for a long, sweet, sad moment. When he pulled away, he touched her cheek and said softly, "Thank you. For everything. You're the best woman I've ever known, Jules, and I love you so goddamn much."

And then he walked away.

* * *

><p>Metatron turned the silver angel blade in his hands, studying the sharp tip. These things were so interesting, possessing the ability to kill angels, demons, and, of course, humans. Oh, humans…they were so <em>breakable<em>. It was hard to find something that _didn't _kill them! Even humans like Dean Winchester, who didn't seem to be able to stay dead.

Speaking of Dean Winchester…he should be here soon. Beelzebub's plan had been near foolproof, with the only real variable being Castiel running to his precious Winchester's and telling them what was about to happen. Of course, that wasn't really a variable. The angel was far too dependent on those brothers, as desperately in love with them as he was with humanity.

One of these days, it was going to get him killed. For good.

Metatron imagined the look on Castiel's face when he realized that the heroic attack he was about to launch was straight into a trap. That stupidly selfless, heroic angel would hopefully get what was coming to him today, as well as his pet humans. To be honest, Metatron didn't really care about Beelzebub's promise of a new heaven on earth. He was willing to fight this battle just for revenge. He wanted revenge on the angel and the two brothers who were foolish enough to take his power and try to contain him. He was heaven's scribe, and he was not to be toyed with, as they would soon be learning.

The angel was starting to get a little tired of waiting for them to walk into his trap, though. His angels were all stationed outside the warehouse where he waited, hiding and waiting to ambush the foolish hunters and angels who tried to attack. If they ever did try to attack…

With no warning, there was suddenly an explosion of sound outside the warehouse. Metatron got up and rushed to the window as the roar of angry shouts and chaotic fighting only got louder.

He frowned as he looked outside and saw twice the number of angels sparring out there as there should have been. Over twenty of Castiel's angels had appeared out of nowhere and begun to attack his waiting angels. That shouldn't have been possible, because no angel could break the sigils warding angels away.

But then again, Sam and Dean Winchester weren't angels, were they?

Metatron resisted the urge to scream and rage as he realized that _he _was the one being surprised now. Somehow, Castiel and his angels must have known that Metatron and his followers would be expecting them, because they were ready.

Castiel's angels had attacked from opposite sides, drawing Metatron's angels out of hiding and causing two epic battles to break out on either side of the entrance to the warehouse. As Metatron observed the fighting, he saw the only reason his angels were standing a chance: Castiel's angels were trying not to kill their opponents. Disarm, wound, or subdue, yes, but not kill. He obviously wanted no more angel blood spilled, while Metatron didn't care anymore. Heaven had already failed, and the angels were a dying race. If they all died today, what did he care, as long as he survived?

Metatron began to grow suspicious as the angels continued to battle, but Castiel and his followers didn't even attempt to storm the warehouse where Metatron waited. Metatron got a glimpse of a familiar-looking blond woman sparring an angel and holding her own, and recognized her as Dean Winchester's little girlfriend that the demons had captured all that time ago. But neither brother was anywhere to be seen among the action.

Metatron finally realized what their game was. Castiel and his angels were just a diversion until Sam and Dean Winchester could get to Metatron through the huge opening they had created. Metatron knew he should be scared at the thought of the hunters coming to kill him, but instead he grinned.

Perhaps things were still going to end up going according to plan after all…

* * *

><p>Sam looked around nervously as the fighting only continued. Cas and his angels had more than done their job, and there wasn't a single one of Metatron's angels still guarding the entrance to the warehouse where that evil angel must be waiting.<p>

Sam, Dean, and Julie had made quick work of the symbols warding off angels so the attack could begin, and then she had gone with Cas to fight the angels. Sam tried not to worry about Julie, the only human in the midst of an angelic war. She was tough, and she could take care of herself, and Cas had assigned Hannah to make sure Julie stayed safe. Dean wouldn't be able to go on if he survived this fight but Julie didn't.

Speaking of Dean…Sam turned to face his brother. The elder Winchester dumped his bag of hunting supplies on the ground, which he had gotten out of Baby's trunk. That had concerned Sam, seeing the way Dean had lovingly patted the Impala's side and looked like it like he was saying goodbye to an old friend. Yes, there was a good chance they could die in this fight, but that seemed far too certain of a goodbye for Sam's taste.

Dean picked up an angel Blade and tucked it into his belt. He picked up his favorite gun as well, although it'd be little use to him, and tucked it into the waistband of his jeans. Then he sighed and tucked the bundle the First Blade was wrapped in into his jacket. Sam watched sadly as his brother ran a hand through his hair and sighed tiredly, looking much older than he really was.

"You ready, Dean?" Sam asked his brother gently.

Dean looked up and forced a smile. "Yeah. What about you, Sammy? Ready to take out this son of a bitch once and for all?"

Sam smirked. "This is long overdue."

"Couldn't agree more." Dean stopped and took a deep breath. "Look, Sam… before…before anything else happens, I just wanted to thank you."

"For what, Dean?" Sam asked, confused.

"For…for believing in me. For letting me come back into your life even after what I almost became and for believing in me now, even as it's happening again…"

Sam sighed. This sounded like one of Dean's stupid "Sammy, let me go" speeches again, and he was tired of them.

"Of course I let you come back into my life, Dean! I needed you, and I still do. We all do. And of course I believe in you. If there's anyone that can do this…it's my brother."

Dean smiled sadly. "Thanks, Sammy." Then his eyes somehow got even sadder. "Listen…just in case…just in case I don't make it out of this, could you…just promise me you'll take care of Jules, okay?"

"Of course," Sam frowned. "But I won't need to, because you can do it yourself."

"Right." Dean cleared his throat. "Well, let's get going then. We've got an asshole of an angel to kill."

Sam turned around and began to walk towards the warehouse. But he hadn't gotten four steps when something hard connected with the back of his head and everything went dark.

Dean caught Sam under the armpits just before his little brother's head hit the floor. He dragged Sam's unconscious body over to a dark corner behind a couple abandoned boxes, hiding him from view, grunting with the weight. "Damn, Sammy, when did you get do big?" he grumbled, knowing his brother couldn't hear him.

Sam would never forgive him for this. If Dean ended up surviving this, Sam probably wouldn't speak to him for a week. But this had to happen. No matter what happened in there with Metatron, Sam had to be safe.

Dean blinked back a bit of wetness in his eyes looking down at Sam's unconscious face. He wasn't ready to say goodbye to his beloved little brother yet. But it was time. In fact, he was running out of time. Cas and his angels couldn't fight forever.

"I'm sorry, Sam," Dean whispered even though he couldn't hear him. "You wouldn't understand. But…no matter what happens, you've got to live." Dean took a deep breath and smiled sadly down at his brother.

"You be good, kid," he muttered, repeating something he'd often said to Sam when he was just a boy, usually accompanied by a ruffle of his floppy hair. "Bye, Sammy," Dean added at a whisper.

And then he turned and went to face his fate.


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter Thirty-Five**

"Dean Winchester!"

Dean resisted the urge to roll his eyes at the smug, haughty way Metatron cried his name. How dumb _was _this angel? His angel army was obviously losing, and they both knew Dean possessed a weapon that gave him more than enough power to kill the angel. Why wasn't he already gone?

Dean stepped into the wide open space, glaring at the small, harmless-looking angel in front of him. Metatron grinned, and there was a crazed light in his eyes. The evil angel had been waiting for a long time for a chance to kill Dean, and vice versa.

"You never do seem to learn, do you, Dean?" Metatron chuckled.

"Not sure exactly what you're referring to, but probably not," Dean admitted, sticking his hands into the pockets of his jeans and walking casually closer.

The angel seemed a bit put-out that Dean didn't seem terrified. But there was almost nothing left in the world that scared Dean…besides himself.

"Do you remember the last time we were in a position like this?" Metatron said, smirking nastily. "Just you and me alone, a fight to the death. And you were struggling with the First Blade then, as well. I remember how messed-up you were, practically black-eyed already. If little brother hadn't come in and stopped you, who knows what could have happened…"

"Well, for one thing I would have killed you," Dean pointed out. "Sometimes I really regret that decision."

"Well, here's your chance," the angel said, spreading his arms wide in a welcoming gesture. "Unless Sam's around here somewhere to stop you again."

"Sam's not coming this time," Dean said firmly. "Just you and me, you son of a bitch."

"Better watch that mouth of yours. You're addressing an angel of the Lord."

Dean snorted. "I may not have the highest opinion of the big guy upstairs, but I sure as hell know that you don't work for him anymore."

"No, I suppose that's true," Metatron shrugged. "Nor do I work for Beelzebub. Once you're dead, and hopefully Castiel and your brother as well, maybe your girlfriend if I'm lucky, I'll disappear. I know how to survive, Dean Winchester. No demons or angels or pathetic hunters could ever find me. And once you all are dead and gone, I'll still remain. Maybe I'll take another shot at God once you all have failed."

"You seem pretty confident that you're coming out of this alive, considering I have the weapon that kill almost anything in creation," Dean said coldly.

"But you're afraid to use it, aren't you, Dean? You know if you kill me with the First Blade, you'll lose control. You already killed Cain, and that almost pushed you over the edge. You can hide it from Sam and that girl and Castiel, but I can tell. You're almost gone. And killing an angel, an evil act in itself, will destroy you." Metatron grinned. "Kill me and you won't even be _human_, Dean!"

"So I don't kill you with the Blade, and everything works out nice and easy," Dean said calmly, pulling out an angel blade.

Metatron did the same. "You cannot beat me without that Blade. I'm an angel, and a powerful one at that. And I've been stealing grace, growing stronger all the time…without that Blade, you can't win and you know it."

He did know it. He had known that since Cas and Crowley explained what was happening several hours ago. But that didn't matter now. What mattered was that Cas and Sam and Julie stay safe. And if this asshole died too, then that was a nice bonus.

"People have been telling me I can't win, and that I'll die my entire life," Dean shrugged. "I'm still here. They're all dead. Not sure what that means, but…"

"But how much longer can you do that?" Metatron shot back. "How many more times can you die and come back before you don't come back human?"

"Guess we'll find out," Dean muttered, and he stepped forward.

His first strike was a bit sloppy, and Metatron dodged it. The angel countered his next strike and found them evenly matched, even with all of the stolen grace powering him up. Dean Winchester had the Mark of Cain, and his natural strength and skill, and Metatron knew if this man was wielding the First Blade, he would certainly lose.

Scared by the thought, Metatron went on the offensive this time. Dean managed to block or dodge several of his strikes, but finally Metatron was able to nick Dean's side, cutting a small gash in the skin over his ribs. Dean winced slightly but kept on defending himself.

The more the angel attacked, the more he realized…there was something wrong. Dean had brute strength, but he had skill as well. He was one of the most formidable fighters Metatron had ever seen in action, and that terrifying opponent was not the man he was dueling now. This man seemed to almost be holding back to make his skills even with the angel's.

Metatron wasn't going to complain though, if it meant that he survive this fight and get his revenge on this foolish man.

Metatron finally got a good swipe in and caught Dean across the forearm, cutting through his jacket and skin. The man cried out in pain and released his weapon.

And the angel grinned. Finally, here came the good part.

He waved his arm and Dean flew several feet backwards and into a wall. He collapsed onto all fours and pushed himself upright, still a little dazed and wounded. By the time the eldest Winchester was back on his feet, Metatron had reached his opponent, and he punched the man right in his stupidly handsome face, laughing as Dean stumbled back.

"You're slipping, Dean," Metatron chuckled, hitting Dean again with a wicked uppercut. The taller man doubled over and Metatron waved his hand, sending the man crashing to the ground. The angel stood smugly over Dean Winchester and kicked him once, twice, three times in the side, his smile widening with every pained groan.

"I'm not very impressed. That was hardly a fight at all." Dean squeezed his eyes shut and held his breath as the angel kicked him yet again, hard. Couldn't the bastard just kill him quickly? He had obviously won!

Metatron stopped attacking and Dean opened his eyes. "Get up," the evil angel smirked. "I want a real fight."

Shakily, Dean hauled himself into an almost standing position. But before he could even stand upright, Metatron lunged forward and plunged his blade into Dean's left shoulder.

Dean screamed through gritted teeth as skin and muscles tore. Metatron pulled out the knife and Dean collapsed to his knees again, clutching at the bloody hole in his shoulder.

"You really thought I'd give you another chance?!" Metatron laughed gleefully as Dean struggled to make his labored breathing steady. "No. You're going to die, Winchester. I'm going to kill you."

"Then…do it already," Dean got out, glaring up at the angel.

Metatron cocked his head, confused and surprised. "That's odd. Most people don't want to die. But then again, most people aren't the pathetic mess you are."

Metatron struck him across the face, and Dean rolled with the hit. But the angel continued to rain blow upon blow on him until Dean's lips were split and his eyes were swollen and hard to see through, and there were a dozen bruises and patches of blood on his face.

The angel knelt in front of the beaten man and reached inside his jacket. If Dean had the strength or the voice, he would have made some joke about "not rolling that way," but he could barely do more than hurt. Metatron pulled out the brown bundle from Dean's jacket and unwrapped it.

"I thought so," the angel chuckled. "You could have beaten me, Dean. You could have killed me with this, but you're choosing not to. You _want _to die, don't you?"

Metatron laughed again and threw the First Blade behind him, far out of Dean's reach.

Dean's swollen eyes widened as much as they could as he saw the Blade land at a familiar pair of black, polished dress shoes.

Somehow, Metatron didn't even notice the demon standing a few yards behind him, holding an angel blade. He was too busy gloating over the beaten man in front of him. But Dean saw Crowley and met the demon's eyes.

It was clear what Crowley was doing here, what he was offering Dean. If Dean wanted, the demon would drive his angel blade into Metatron's back and end the bastard, saving Dean. He was here to save Dean. And Dean knew he should nod at Crowley, let the demon save him, and try to fight the Mark and Blade with the people he loved by his side.

But he couldn't anymore. He just couldn't. He was tired, so tired, and he had been for a decade. He didn't want to fight anymore. He just wanted to rest.

Crowley felt his stomach turn at the sight of the man in front of him. It was clearly Dean, but it was a badly beaten version of the man. And that angel cackling in front of him was obviously the one beating and cutting him up like that. Crowley had never been much of a fan of angels, but he truly despised this one. That was the closest thing he had to a friend, that broken man lying there, wishing for death.

Crowley knelt and picked up the First Blade. He knew that Dean saw him, even if Metatron didn't. And if that hunter nodded or so much as looked like he wanted help, Crowley would kill Metatron without a second thought. So that wasn't the plan. So what? Dean could fulfill his destiny later. But it didn't have to be today! He could have a few more happy days with all of the people he actually cared about before it came time for Crowley to make sure he took the next step.

But, to Crowley's surprise and something close to horror, Dean very subtly shook his head.

Crowley's frown deepened. He had always known Dean Winchester was a stubborn idiot, but this was ridiculous! Crowley was giving him the chance to live, and he would rather die at the hands of this sadistic angel?

Metatron suddenly drove his angel blade deep into Dean's thigh, and the poor man cried out in agony. It took all of Crowley's willpower not to step forward and save Dean.

"Don't," the hunter choked out, trying to pass it off as begging Metatron to stop. But Dean would never beg this angel for anything, and Crowley knew it was really that idiot telling him not to save him.

Metatron laughed. "Oh, I like that. Why don't you beg me not to hurt you some more? Maybe cry a little?"

Metatron made a gash on Dean's cheek, but the man didn't cry out this time. Instead he kept his steely green eyes locked on Crowley, telling him to leave.

Fine. If that idiot wanted to let that sadistic angel torture him to death, Crowley wouldn't stop him. That's what Beelzebub's plan had been all along, anyway. This way, he wasn't even risking his neck to help Dean, but following orders.

Metatron hit Dean again, and the man couldn't stop a groan of pain from escaping his lips.

No. No more. Crowley couldn't stay and watch any more of this. If this fool wanted to die, then fine. But Crowley wouldn't stand here and watch.

So Crowley shook his head slightly at the foolish hunter in front of him and left him to die, taking the only weapon that could possibly save Dean with him.

* * *

><p>When Sam woke, his head was throbbing, but his muscles weren't stiff enough to have been lying in this dark alley long. And there was still the sound of fighting going on, although it was much more subdued. Cas and his angels must have disarmed most of Metatron's angels, or they were almost all dead.<p>

But that wasn't Sam's biggest problem. Not even close.

Dean was gone.

He should have seen this coming. Julie had warned Sam that Dean was going to try something stupid and selfless. Hell, Sam had _known_ that! And then with the whole goodbye speech…Sam should have expected this. But, god, that _idiot_! That absolutely idiotic, selfish bastard he called a brother! For no one else would have knocked him out and then deposited him safely out of the way of battle before charging in alone. If Dean wasn't already dead in there, facing Metatron alone, Sam was going to _kill_ him!

Sam got to his feet quickly, trying to ignore his spinning head. He found that he still had his angel blade, and he took off running towards the warehouse. He had to get in there, had to get to Dean before it was too late…

As he ran past the two fights, he noticed that most of Metatron's angels were unconscious or had surrendered. Eight or so still fought, but they were clearly about to lose. Sam didn't have time to check to make sure Cas and Julie and Hannah were all alright, though. All that mattered was Dean.

Sam got to the warehouse and ran inside. For a moment, he had no idea where to go, and then he heard a voice coming from the hallway ahead of him.

It was Metatron's voice, and Sam slowed to a stealthy walk as he approached the door that led to where his brother and that evil angel must be. It was cracked open slightly, so Sam could hear what was going on as he approached.

Someone was breathing heavy, labored, pained breaths. Sam hoped it was Metatron, but then the angel's smug voice said, "Had enough yet, Dean? You must be tired. Even _I'm _getting a little bored playing with you. What do you say we end this and I put you out of your misery?"

No. _No_. Sam abandoned all caution and threw the door wide open as he reached it, and he charged in.

And then he stopped dead in his tracks as he watched Metatron's silver blade stab into Dean's stomach.

"_Dean_!" Sam roared, charging forward. Metatron leapt up from his position over Sam's brother and whirled around, wide-eyed and surprised, maybe even a little scared.

And rightly so. The evil angel had barely turned around before Sam reached him, and Metatron couldn't even attempt to defend himself before Sam's angel blade stabbed him in the throat.

The angel wailed as a white light glowed out of him, and then he fell to the ground, finally dead. Sam didn't even care that his despicable foe had finally been killed. Nothing mattered but the bloody, battered, broken man slumped against the wall.

"Dean!" Sam cried again, running to his brother. There was so much blood on Dean, on his face, on his torn clothes, on his shoulder, his leg, and there was too much blood blooming on his stomach. But Sam ignored all of the blood as he knelt by Dean and cupped his brother's face in his hands.

"Oh, god. Oh, god. You're okay, Dean, you're gonna be okay," Sam said breathlessly, looking over his battered brother. There was a nasty wound in his shoulder and leg, plus countless bruises and smaller cuts all over him, but nothing was as bad as the awful wound in his stomach.

That would be the thing that would kill him.

No. No, Dean would not die. No, no, no.

"…Sammy?" Dean asked weakly, his voice thin and hoarse. He could barely see through his swollen eyes, but he could just make out his little brother's worried, terrified face.

"I'm here, Dean," Sam choked out, trying not to panic. He pressed down on Dean's stomach wound, trying to slow the bleeding. "Just hang on. I'll get you out of here and patch you up. You'll be okay, I promise. Just hang on a bit longer."

"Didn't…want you…to see me…like this," Sam's big brother got out, coughing weakly once he was finished. A dribble of blood came from the corner of his mouth.

"Don't talk, Dean," Sam ordered, trying to stay calm. "Just stay calm. I'll get you some help. You'll be okay. You'll be…"

Was he crying? Oh, god. The lump in his throat was making it hard to speak or swallow, and his vision was a bit blurry. But he couldn't cry. He had to take care of Dean, like Dean had done for him his whole life.

"Sammy…tell…tell Jules…tell her I'm sorry and…I love her," Dean said weakly, and it was clear it was taking all of his strength to get those words out. His breaths were coming shorter and shallower, and Sam was so scared. This couldn't be happening. Not now, not after everything…not Dean. Not him.

"You can do it yourself," Sam said firmly.

Dean tried to smile. "Sam…thank you."

"You can thank me once I get you back to normal," Sam grumbled, trying to force down his emotions. Dean was so weak, and he was getting weaker every second, and there was nothing Sam could do…

"Sammy…" Dean whispered in a voice so soft and weak Sam barely heard it. "I…" Sam waited to hear what Dean had to say next. _I'm sorry? I'm proud of you? I love you?_

And then the life left Dean's green eyes.

Sam waited for Dean to suck in another painful breath. He waited for Dean to suddenly sit up and grin and say, "Gotcha! Oh, god, Sammy, you should have seen your face!" He waited, and waited, until he couldn't see through his tears anymore. And then, when everything in him knew that his big brother was dead, again, he finally gave in. He crushed Dean's body to his in a tight hug, clinging to the dead man's body like he could bring life into it again just by loving him and wanting him and needing him enough.

And Sam sobbed and yelled Dean's name over until his voice broke and he had no tears left to cry.

* * *

><p>"I'm fine, Cas," Julie snapped. "Really."<p>

The angel hovered around her, clearly not believing her. She had already let him heal the cut on her arm and her broken ankle, but she had honestly fared pretty well for such a long, intense battle against beings much more powerful than her. They had all fared well, really. Only three angels had died, one of Cas's followers and two of Metatron's. Those of Metatron's followers who had remained loyal throughout the battle were all disarmed and herded together over by the entrance to the warehouse where Metatron was, guarded by several of Castiel's angels. Many of Metatron's followers had surrendered though and seemed to want to join Castiel's followers. In all, the battle had gone as well as they could have hoped.

The pretty brunette angel, Hannah appeared at Cas's shoulder. "Castiel," she said gravely, her blue eyes sad and worried.

"What's wrong, Hannah?" Cas asked, turning to face her.

"Sam Winchester just came out of that warehouse," she said in that same careful, serious tone.

"Is he okay?" Julie cried, taking off before the angel could answer. She started to run towards the front of the warehouse to see Sam, but the angel appeared in front of her.

"Wait," Hannah said. "You should not go there."

"What? Of course I'm going there! I'm going to make sure Sam is okay, and you are not stopping me!" Julie pushed pack the angel and rushed around the corner.

The first thing she saw was the group of angels guarding the few Metatron-loyalists. They were all staring at something past them, but a couple turned and gave Julie somber looks as she approached.

"What's going on?" Julie snapped as she reached them. "Where's Metatron? Where are Sam and Dean?"

One angel, that one she had met all those months ago when he kidnapped her and Sam, Jonah, looked at her sadly and jerked his head to the left.

She turned just as Cas caught up with her, and they both turned to see Sam standing a few feet away. "Sam!" Cas cried. "I'm glad you're alright!"

The hunter said nothing, and Julie noticed the pain in his otherwise blank expression. She knew that face. It was the carefully controlled mask both brothers put on when they talked about a time when the other had…

No.

She pushed the thought away. It was stupid. It was crazy. "Where's Metatron?" Julie asked Sam.

"Dead," he said flatly.

Julie nodded. "Good. Did Dean…?"

Sam shook his head. "No. Me."

Julie nodded, relieved. This meant that Dean wouldn't have another death trying to pull him down into darkness. She had rarely been more grateful to Sam.

"Is Dean okay?" Julie asked Sam, concerned.

He didn't say anything, just looked down.

Julie suddenly noticed that Sam had clearly been crying, and very recently.

"Where is he?" Cas asked sharply, and Julie was surprised. "Where is Dean, Sam?"

"Castiel…" Hannah said gently, appearing at his shoulder. "I am so very sorry…"

"Why are you sorry?" Julie snapped, still in denial. "Sam, what's she sorry about? Sam, _where's Dean_?"

Finally, Sam turned slightly to look at something lying on the ground a few yards behind him.

Oh, god. Oh, god, no.

There was a moment of silence as the forty angels gathered around waited with bated breath to see what would happen. And then Julie, who had been standing perfectly still, screamed in the most heartbreaking, desperate voice any of them had ever heard, "_Dean_!"

She took off running towards the body on the ground and Sam realized what she was doing. "Julie, wait!" he said, stepping to intercept her. He caught Julie and held her back from Dean's body. "Julie, stop! You don't want to see that, trust me."

But Julie couldn't even hear him. Nothing mattered but the bloody, beaten corpse on the ground that was the man she loved. Nothing. She screamed Dean's name over and over, screaming and swearing at Sam, trying to get free. "Let me go, dammit!" she wailed. "Let me see him! Sam, _let me go_!"

"Julie, stop," Sam begged. "You don't want to see what that bastard did to him, you don't."

Eventually, his words reached her ears and Julie finally quit struggling to reach Dean. Then she collapsed, sobbing, into Sam's arms, and he held her tightly, struggling to hold back his own tears as she sobbed uncontrollably. "I know, Julie," he whispered in a broken voice. "God, I know."

Eventually, Sam raised his eyes to look for Cas. But the angel was gone. He had vanished as soon as he knew for certain whose corpse it was on the ground. Sam was sure he was off searching heaven and hell for Dean's soul to get it back, but Sam doubted the angel would ever find it. The First Blade and the Mark of Cain affected their bearer even in death, and Sam feared there was no way to bring Dean back.

The angels stood in silence, watching the brother of that dead man comfort the sobbing woman. One of Metatron's most loyal followers, an angel called Delilah, felt something close to guilt for the first time as she saw the anguish on the humans' faces. Metatron had killed that man, tortured him to death, and any man who two people would grieve so strongly for…he had to have been a good man.

Delilah began to doubt, then. She wondered how right Metatron really could have been, to kill a man so loved.

Eventually, the angels dispersed, leaving Sam and Julie alone to grieve. And then it was just the three of them together, just like old times. Sam, Dean, and Julie. Just like the happy, good old days.

Except that one of them was dead, and the other two would never be happy without him.

* * *

><p>Sam poured himself a glass of scotch and downed it. Then another. And another.<p>

The past twelve hours had been hell for him. He'd watched his brother die, seen the horror and unimaginable pain in Julie's eyes when she finally realized what had happened, held her while she cried until there was nothing left in her to grieve…

And then things had gotten even worse. Cas eventually returned, saying that he could not find Dean's soul in heaven or hell. There was no way to get Dean back. Somehow, Julie had managed to find a few more tears to shed, but they had both known that would happen.

And then…Sam and Julie had buried Dean.

Burying Dean was one of the most painful, horrible things Sam ever did. He had buried Dean before, when his brother had sold his soul and gone to hell to bring Sam back to life. Then he had been alone, and so drunk that he could barely see straight. He had Julie this time, but it didn't make the pain any less. It just kept him from completely falling apart.

Julie had never had to bury Dean before, and it was horrible for her. They put him in a cheap wooden coffin and Cas buried it instantly, rather than having the hunters dig a deep hole and fill it back in. Julie had barely spoken since seeing Dean's corpse, so she just stared at the plain marker Sam put in the ground and cried silently.

This wasn't over! Sam resisted the urge to slam his fist down on the bar in the bunker as he poured himself yet another glass. It couldn't be over! There were still the Knights to defeat and innocent people to save and so many more years that he needed his brother. Losing Dean wasn't exactly a new experience for Sam, but that didn't make it hurt any less. And this time felt…different. More final.

Sam had been tempted to try to sell his soul while they were out by Dean's grave. There was a crossroad nearby, and he was on his way there when Julie had found him. She had just said, "Sam, no," and he had stopped. He knew that no demon would make a deal with him, anyway.

But he wanted his brother back.

Sam barely looked up as someone walked over to the bar and sat down on the stool next to him. Julie said nothing as she got out her own glass and filled it. She didn't even like scotch very much, but she _needed_ to be drunk right now.

_This _was her worst fear. Forget the monster in the maze all those weeks ago. Losing Dean, knowing that he was nothing but a cold corpse in the ground…nothing was worse than that. She had lost her mother and her father and several hunter friends, but no death, not even her parents', had hurt like this.

She loved Dean. She loved him so damn much, and she needed him. He had always said he needed her, but the truth was she needed him, too. And now, with him gone and no way to get him back….Julie was pretty sure that if it weren't for the man next to her, in the same amount of pain, who really needed her, she might not be able to go on at all.

Julie started on her second glass of scotch, and then, against her will, she began to remember. She remembered the first time she ever saw Dean Winchester, standing over her, having just killed the demon attempting to kill her. She remembered the half-smirk he'd given her in the bar that first night, and the way he'd threatened that asshole who wouldn't leave her alone. She remembered those first few days of research and hunting and talking, getting to know each other, starting to fall for him. She relived that night when he'd finally told her the truth, and all of it.

She remembered that first kiss. That wonderful first kiss that had made her feel alive like no other kiss before.

The days passed faster then. A sunny day out at a ballpark, an evening at a nice restaurant, their first night together. Days of living together in a small town in Illinois in a cute little house with nice neighbors and friends and an almost normal life. And then Sam came into their lives, and things changed.

She remembered past hunts, the way Dean would often charge in and save her, or vice versa. Julie remembered nights sitting in the bunker, the three of them drinking, watching TV, playing poker, just talking and laughing. She remembered the awful way her grandmother had treated Dean, that wonderful man, and she remembered killing the vampires who had dared to hurt the man she loved. Julie remembered Dean killing himself to save Cas, the pain and fear she had felt then infinitely worse now. She remembered watching Dean face off against Knights of Hell, remembered the panic she had felt as Cain stood over Dean about to kill him, remembered the fear she'd felt seeing a demonic Dean in that maze.

Julie remembered nights alone with Dean, talking, kissing, having sex, falling asleep in each other's arms. She remembered dancing with him in the bunker, remembered the joy she'd felt seeing him again after her time in hell. She remembered every kiss, every touch, every fight, every night spent together.

And then she remembered the pain. The overwhelming, life-shattering, heart-breaking pain of seeing him lying beaten and bloody and dead on the ground.

Sam realized with a start that Julie was crying silently. He stood up and moved closer to her, wrapping his arms around her without a word. Julie buried her face in his shirt, her thin shoulders shaking with her sobs.

_How could he? _Sam thought angrily, his thoughts a little clouded due to the dangerous amount of alcohol he'd ingested. _How could Dean do this to her?! To Sam?! _For Dean had chosen this. He knocked Sam out so he could face the dangerous angel alone, and Sam knew that his brother should have been able to kill Metatron. But he had refused to use the First Blade, and he had died because of it, leaving behind a brother and a girlfriend to grieve and suffer without him. How could he do that?

"How do you do it?" Julie muttered into Sam's shirt after a long time.

"Do what?" Sam asked, confused.

"How do you survive without him? How did you do it all those other times?"

Sam laughed bitterly. "I didn't."

"What?" Julie asked, finally emerging from his shirt.

"I mean, I survived. But I wasn't living." Sam looked past Julie at nothing, looking haunted. "Even when he wasn't dead, but we were separated a while ago…I can't live without him."

"I think I know what you mean," she whispered, and the two broken hunters held each other in silence.

* * *

><p>Crowley stood in silence in front of the unmarked grave. Just a simple wooden cross sticking out of the earth marking the resting place of Dean Winchester. Crowley wouldn't say final resting place, because he knew what was going to happen. He just had to make sure that he got here before Beelzebub, or his entire plan would fall to pieces, and the Knights of Hell would begin their own little apocalypse.<p>

The wind changed, blowing his suit jacket back a bit and chilling the demon. It was completely dark out, except for the pale light of the moon. There was no one around here, and there hadn't been for several hours, since Sam and Julie and Castiel had buried their loved one. Crowley had watched from the shadows as the girl cried and the brother stood there looking broken and the angel fought to keep his composure. This had been Crowley's plan from the beginning, but seeing how destroyed those people were…it almost made him feel guilty. Almost.

God, this was taking forever. Crowley finally got tired of waiting and snapped his fingers. The coffin, buried six feet under, suddenly appeared next to him. The demon stared at the wooden box, waiting…

Finally, he snapped, "Oh, come on. It's been almost twenty-four hours. I know the process is complete. Now quit being a drama queen and get up."

There was a beat, and then suddenly the lid of the coffin blew off and went sailing several feet away to crash loudly into a tree, shattering. Crowley rolled his eyes and muttered, "Showoff."

The man inside the coffin sat up and grinned, stretching his arms. "Awesome," he murmured. "Did you know we can do that, Crowley?"

"_You _can actually do a lot more than that," the demon pointed out. "I'm just a normal demon."

"Right," the once-dead man said slowly, standing up and stepping out of his coffin. He looked the same as he had when he had been buried. Castiel had caused the blood to vanish from his corpse, but his clothes were still messy and torn. But even with his tattered clothes, the man looked pretty good, definitely too good for someone who should be dead.

He stripped off his tattered jacket and studied the Mark of Cain on his forearm. Crowley couldn't explain it, but it didn't look inflamed anymore, like it was a wound. It looked like it belonged on him. It suited him now.

The man grinned. "So I guess this means I'm a Knight of Hell, then? The next Cain?"

Crowley shrugged. "No one knows what this means. The only other bearer of the Mark and user of the First Blade was Cain, and when he died, he became a demon. So I just assumed…"

The man shook his head. "You've been planning this all along, haven't you?"

"In my defense, so was Beelzebub. This was his master plan, to have this happen to you and for you to join his side. But I had to make sure I got to you first and explained to you why working with me would be so much better."

"Well then, explain," he said calmly, crossing his arms.

Crowley smirked. "Well, first off, I've done nothing but help you so far. I haven't tried to kill or torture you, so that's one thing. And I'm not going to expect you to serve me. You and I can do whatever we want. We can gamble and drink and whatever the hell you want. Stick with me and you'll see what makes this life so great."

The man thought it over for a moment. "You've got me convinced," he shrugged after a minute. "So…when do we start?"

"Now," Crowley grinned. "Welcome to the dark side, Dean Winchester."

Dean grinned back, and his green eyes suddenly became the pure black of a demon's.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Please don't kill me for what I did to Dean! I felt like it was the only way that the Mark of Cain storyline could end, and also something that had to happen in the Supernatural storyline. I promise I will not be following the canon storyline with demon Dean, though-it will be all original. I'm actually really excited to write this demon Dean storyline, and I hope you all will be excited to read it. I also have a favor to ask, to help benefit me as a writer. If you would like to, please let me know in the reviews what your favorite chapter(s) has been so far and why, so that I can figure out what works well and what doesn't. Thank you all for your support, and please keep reading and reviewing!


	36. Chapter 36

**Chapter Thirty-Six**

Julie woke up in the guest bedroom. She had moved all of her stuff out of her and Dean's old bedroom and into here last night, unable to be in that room without him. But she didn't remember coming in here last night. The last thing she remembered was her and Sam hugging and crying and grieving and drinking together in silence. She forgot what had happened after her seventh or so drink. She must have passed out, and Sam must have carried her in here, despite having drunk even more than her last night.

Sure enough, when Julie tried to sit up, a stabbing pain in her head put her back on the bed, groaning. She had rarely had a headache this bad, and it was making her nauseous. Julie barely hauled herself into the bathroom and to the toilet before she began puking up the few things she had actually eaten yesterday. When she was done puking, she rested her forehead against the cold seat of the toilet, trying to recover.

There were very few times Julie had been more hung over than this in her life. But the stabbing pain in her head and the crappy, sick way she felt could not possibly compare with the pain she felt at waking up alone. He should have been in bed next to her to catch her when she fell back and to hold her hair back while she puked. He should be rubbing her back in soothing circles and making some jokes about all the times he'd been hung over, and Julie would think how much of an idiot he was, and how much she loved him.

She felt the tears coming and thought angrily, _No! You cried enough yesterday. Today you're going to actually act like the tough hunter you are. You're going to quit crying about losing Dean and do something to get him back._

But there was nothing she could do to get him back, and she knew it. Cas was powerless, and Sam and Julie were just as helpless. Dean was gone, and they had no way to revive him, or even a place to start looking.

Julie knew she should get up and do something, maybe check on Sam, for surely he wouldn't be faring well, either. But Julie could not find the will to get up. Dean was dead. What did it matter if she never left this bathroom, if that wonderful, stupid, brave, selfless, headstrong, funny, charming man was dead?

"Dean," Julie whispered, even though it hurt her throat to speak. Maybe Cas couldn't find his soul because he was hanging around as a ghost. Maybe he could hear her now. "Dean, if you can hear me…come back. Please. I can't do this without you. I _can't_!"

But there was no answer. Either Dean couldn't come back to her, or he just didn't care. For once, Julie actually hoped that Dean wasn't coming back because he was really gone. Because the alternative, that he _could_ be here with her but was choosing not to be…that was almost more painful than losing him.

* * *

><p>Dean pulled the collar of his grey t-shirt down to study the tattoo on his skin. There was a thin line running through it, breaking the anti-possession symbol. "I guess Metatron did me more than favors than he realized," Dean commented. "If he hadn't broken that symbol while he was cutting me up, I would have had to possess some other body, and I have to admit, I'm kind of attached to this one."<p>

Crowley rolled his eyes as the man continued to check himself out in the rear view mirror of the cheap car Crowley had stolen. The two of them were driving down the highway with the windows rolled down, and the wind was blowing through Dean's hair, making him look like even more of a male model than usual.

The old Dean had never really embraced his good looks. That hunter had known he was attractive, and it had made him confident enough to talk to women and get in their pants, but he had never really been able to accept the idea that he was really handsome, having such a low opinion of himself. But now that those old feelings were out of the way, Dean was finally seeing the hot guy dozens of other women had drooled over, and he was getting a bit cocky.

"Alright, pretty boy, you can quit preening yourself," Crowley grumbled.

"What's the matter, Crowley? Are you mad I'm not checking you out? You're not looking so bad yourself, pal."

The demon smirked despite himself. "You think I don't know that? And if you ever call me pal again, I just might kill you."

Dean grinned cockily and put his feet up on the dashboard as he spoke. "How are you going to manage that?" the Knight of Hell smirked. "The only thing that can kill a Knight of Hell is me, and I don't really feel like dying again before I've even been alive a whole day."

Crowley knew Dean had him beat there. "Why are we even driving, anyway?" the new demon asked. "If we can just teleport wherever the hell we want…"

"It takes a while to get that power under control," Crowley explained. "And since you're practically a newborn, I thought we wouldn't try to tackle that skill just yet."

"I'll never learn until I try," Dean pointed out. He tried to harness the new, raw power inside of him and make himself appear somewhere else, but instead just succeeded in making his eyes flash black again. "Oh well. Later I guess." Dean began to switch his eyes back and forth between black and green, watching them change in the mirror. "This is actually really fun! Why don't you guys do this more often?"

"We find if we save it for dramatic moments, it makes us look that much more intimidating," the former king of hell said drily.

"Come on, Crowley. You know this is badass," Dean smirked, and he turned towards the other demon and made his eyes flash back and forth between black and green until Crowley felt almost sick.

"Well, you've got that skill mastered," he muttered. "To think a couple days ago, your worst fear was to have black eyes, and now you're messing around with it."

"Yeah, this would scare the shit out of Sam and Julie," Dean chuckled. Crowley tried not to stiffen. That was the first time the young demon had even spoken their names in the almost twenty-four hours he'd been a demon. Crowley waited for emotion to overwhelm the demon at the thought of the people he'd loved and left, but Dean just reached out and turned on the radio. He found a song by AC/DC, "Back in Black" and sang the words loudly, trying to annoy Crowley.

Instead, the demon found himself surprised. He had expected at least some kind of reaction after that casual mention of Dean's brother and girlfriend, but had gotten nothing.

Dean just didn't care anymore. Crowley knew that would happen, and he should have expected it, but it was still mind-blowing to see how drastically the Mark and Blade had changed him. Beelzebub had known that once Dean killed Cain, the dark in him would outweigh the good. He also knew that Dean would be able to feel that and probably want to die, thinking that would save him from going down the path to becoming a demon. But once there was more evil that good in Dean, if he died while bearing the Mark, it would bring him back a demon like it had Cain.

Crowley had known that this was what would happen. Hell, he had been planning for this for months, years, actually. But it was still shocking to see how much Dean had already changed, and he hadn't even embraced his full demonic potential yet.

For a second, Crowley was a little scared of what the newborn demon next to him belting, "I'm back in black!" could become…

* * *

><p>Jasper sighed as he finally pulled into the driveway. It was past midnight, and he'd been driving for over six hours to get home. James had nodded off in the seat next to him, and Taylor was still technically conscious, but staring catatonic out the window. The three of them were wiped out from taking down a small pack of werewolves a few hours north of here, their fourth hunt in two weeks. Even in his prime, Jasper had never been busier than he was now. Every hunter was working full-time, trying to stop the sudden uprising within the community of all things evil. Things were really coming to a high point with all of this Knight of Hell crap, and Jasper worried what that could mean for his niece and the two men she lived with.<p>

Jasper tried not to worry about Julie too much. After all, he had a daughter who was finally getting into hunting, now that she had no other choice, and a hunter he had taken under his wing to worry about. The two were smartass's, troublemakers, and just general pains to be around most of the time. But Jasper had to admit, he would have died dozens of times already without these exhausting young hunters watching his back.

As Jasper pulled up next to the house, Taylor snapped out of her daze and kicked the back of James's seat. The man shot straight up, ready for a fight.

"Calm down, you idiot, we're just home," Taylor muttered, brushing her long blond curls out of her face.

James opened his mouth to snap at her, but Jasper suddenly snapped, "Quiet!" James and Taylor were both confused, until they noticed the familiar black car sitting in the driveway.

The three hunters quickly scrambled out of their truck. No one was in the Impala, but when Jasper rushed to the front door, two people sat on the doorstep, waiting in silence. He stared in surprise as Sam Winchester and his beloved niece both got to their feet. They had been sitting huddled together on the porch step in silence, but as the three hunters approached, Sam and Julie stood up.

Jasper studied them, concerned. Both were oddly quiet and subdued. Even Julie could not raise her eyes to meet Jasper's, and her usual warm smile was nowhere to be seen. Something was wrong, that was clear, but neither hunter spoke a word.

"Julie?" James asked, shocked, as he reached the porch and was able to make out the two figures in the dark.

"What are you doing here, Juliet?" Jasper asked kindly. "Not that I'm not glad to see you, you know I am, but…"

"Sorry," Julie said in a soft, hoarse voice. "We should have called."

"It's fine," Jasper assured her. "I'm glad you're here. I've been worried about you three." He frowned as he noticed that a certain tall, tough, green-eyed hunter was missing from the group.

"Where's your boyfriend?" James asked coldly, also realizing that Dean Winchester was missing. He was not looking forward to seeing that stuck-up bastard again, but he doubted that Julie and Dean would have broken up again.

Julie looked down and bit her lip. Jasper couldn't read her expression, but there was clearly something very wrong. Sam waited to see if Julie would speak, and when she didn't he took a deep breath and said in as level a voice as he could manage, "Dead."

Instantly, James felt like the biggest asshole on the planet. "Oh my god," Taylor gasped. "Are you…?"

"God, I'm so…" James stopped himself, knowing any apology from him would sound cruel and insincere to the two people closest to the dead man.

"What?" Jasper asked slowly, still reeling. "How?"

Sam glanced down at Julie again, but she clearly wasn't able to talk about it just yet. So he said through gritted teeth, "Metatron. The angel killed him…tortured him to death…right before I killed the bastard."

Jasper, James, and Taylor all looked at the poor, grieving hunters sympathetically. Jasper himself was grieving, and Taylor as well. She and Dean had not always gotten along the best, but she had always liked him, even before her cousin fell in love with him. And as for Jasper…he had cared about Dean. A lot. Jasper had been thinking of Dean as family for months now, and even with the whole issue of the Mark of Cain and the Knights of Hell, Jasper wouldn't have been surprised if Julie called him and said that Dean officially _was_ part of the family. The two were so in love, and they'd been living and hunting together for coming up on two years…

But now that was never going to happen. And it made even a tough hunter like Jasper want to cry.

"This is all my fault," Sam grumbled, glaring at his feet.

"Oh, come on," Julie sighed, and it sounded like they'd had this argument several times already.

"If I had been there just a few seconds sooner he could still be here!" Sam cried angrily.

"You can't blame yourself for this," Julie insisted, touching Sam's arm in a comforting gesture.

Taylor studied the two of them. She had always secretly thought that something might be going on between Sam and Julie, or at least something _could _happen between them. She remembered working a shifter case with the three hunters several months ago, back before Julie died and came back, and she had figured out that Sam was definitely into Julie. It was evident in the pathetic, kicked-puppy looks he gave her when her back was turned, and in the way he hung onto every word she said and every move she made. Dean was the same. It was really unfair, actually, the fact that Julie had _two _hot brothers both in love with her, while Taylor was alone. But what else was new?

Then, when Julie and Dean had broken up and Julie had returned home, she had eventually told Taylor about all the things that had gone wrong. She had tried to gloss over it, but Taylor definitely caught the mention of Sam's feelings for her cousin. However, once Julie was back from the dead, it was clear that Julie and Dean would never be separated again, and Sam no longer seemed so pathetically crazy for her.

But Taylor couldn't help but wonder what would happen now that Dean was gone. Obviously Julie was still in love with the man, but as time passed…who knew? Taylor had kept it to herself, but she had always thought Sam and Julie seemed perfect for each other. But there were much bigger issues at hand, like the death of her friend and Julie's boyfriend and Sam's brother.

"Can't you just bring him back like you did Julie?" James pointed out.

"Cas has tried that," Julie said after a moment. "He's gone. Can't find his soul anywhere, in heaven or hell. We don't know exactly what that means, but…it means we can't get him back."

She looked near tears, and Jasper stepped forward and wrapped her in his arms. "I'm so sorry, honey," he whispered. "Juliet, we'll find a way to fix this. I promise."

Julie wanted to believe her uncle as she and the four other hunters went inside to stay the night. She wanted to believe that someday she would be able to see Dean again and hold him in her arms and kiss him and tell him she loved him.

But deep inside, she knew…Dean was gone. And he was probably never coming back.

* * *

><p>Kathy Deluce looked up as a couple more guys entered the bar. They were already pretty full for a Monday night, but she wasn't going to complain. When you were an attractive young bartender like her, more men in the bar meant more tips. If she made enough money tonight, she wouldn't have to work double shifts tomorrow night, and she could actually go out and <em>do <em>something!

_Maybe I'll do _him, Kathy thought wryly, sizing up the taller of the two men. The guy practically oozed sex, tall and muscular, with the face of a male model, and the ripped jeans and dark jacket and dangerous look of a bad boy. His light brown hair was spiked up in a sexy sort of way, and there was a cocky look in his green eyes that she found really freaking hot. As he sauntered over to take a seat at the bar, the man met her eyes and gave her a flirtatious smirk and a nod.

She smiled back flirtatiously and looked down, returning to wiping out beer mugs. _Don't be stupid, Kathy_, she told herself. _The last thing you need is to sleep with _another _asshole who is just going to be gone in the morning._

Crowley watched the way the pretty, busty, redhead bartender was staring at Dean, unashamed. The demon noticed after a few seconds and used his natural flirtatious smirk on her, causing the girl to smile back and look down, blushing as red as her hair. It really wasn't fair, how some men were blessed with looks like Dean's. With the natural charm the guy had, he didn't even need it! But some guys just got everything…

"Not bad," Dean muttered as the bartender turned around and they got a good look at her ass, made even more prominent by her tight, short skirt.

Crowley rolled his eyes. "Really, Dean? You just became a demon. Don't you have better things to be focusing on than her?"

Dean shrugged. "I don't know. Most demons I ran into all seemed to be after one thing, and she is definitely what I want to be after tonight."

"Isn't she a little young for you?" Crowley pointed out. "She can't be older than twenty-five."

"I spent almost two years sleeping with a girl eight years younger than me," Dean pointed out in that same offhand tone he had used before, when referring to Sam and Julie. Crowley waited for some sort of reaction, but the new Knight of Hell just casually waved the hot bartender over.

She tossed her straight, shoulder-length, bright red hair over one shoulder as she reached them and smiled, eyes only on Dean. "What can I get you gentlemen?"

"Why don't you surprise me?" Dean smirked, giving her the same eyes that had gotten him into dozens of women's pants. This was fun! He hadn't been allowed to have fun like this in well over a year. "And for my friend here, the girliest martini you've got."

Crowley shot Dean a death glare as the pretty girl laughed. "Why don't I get you boys some beers to start off with?"

"Sounds great," Dean said. "Thanks…" He paused, clearly waiting for a name.

"Kathy," she supplied with a flirty smile.

"Dean," he replied. She smiled almost as cockily as he was smiling, and then went to get their beers.

Dean looked over and saw Crowley shaking his head in disbelief. "What?" the Knight of Hell shrugged.

"I just didn't expect to see you moving on so quickly," Crowley said slowly. Dean didn't say anything, so Crowley added, "And she's out of your league. You'll have to get pretty damn lucky to get a girl that hot. You're not twenty-six anymore."

Right as Crowley said this, Kathy returned and set down their beers. "You let me know if there's anything else I can do for you, Dean," she said, actually winking at him.

"Oh, I will, sweetheart," the demon replied, and she smirked and walked away. Dean turned back to Crowley and smirked. "I don't know, man. Call it a hunch, but I think I've still got it."

* * *

><p>Kathy rubbed her eyes, exhausted. That had been one long night. She'd been at work until well after midnight, but she had been up for several hours after that. When she tried to roll over, she noticed she was bit sore. Dean Winchester had been a little rough for her taste, but he sure knew how to make a girl feel good.<p>

Kathy knew she should feel bad. It had been a Monday night, and she had left work early to go screw this guy in her apartment, but she had gotten tired of just flirting. She wanted him, and he clearly wanted her. So screw it, why couldn't she have a good night every once in a while?!

She smiled a little to herself as she remembered all of last night. Dean and his friend who he called Crowley had been at the bar for almost three hours, somehow able to put away twice as much beer as any guy in there and still seem pretty much sober. And all night long, Dean had hit on Kathy, and she had flirted back. He looked to be in his mid-thirties, much older than the type of guys she typically went for, but he was so unfairly good-looking she was willing to make an exception.

Eventually, Dean had worn her down (it hadn't taken much), and she had taken him back to her apartment. His friend, Crowley, had seemed a bit annoyed, but Dean clearly wasn't going to listen to anything he had to say. So the two had gone back to her apartment, and Dean had gotten Kathy a little drunk before he finally just grabbed her and started kissing her. It was a bit rougher than she was used to, but she still enjoyed it. And when he dragged her over to the bed, she went with it. He was rough with her at times, but he did everything exactly right.

It had worn her out, though, and she had drifted off naked in bed with him. Now she rolled over to kiss the man and found…

Nothing. There was no one in bed with her. Kathy sat up, pulling the sheets up over her, and looked around. The bed was cold, and his clothes were gone from the floor. In fact, there was no sign that Dean Winchester had ever even been in this room other than the light bruises on her skin.

Kathy resisted the urge to scream at herself in frustration. What had she thought? That the guy from the bar that she had half-drunk sex with would actually be there in the morning? That he actually cared about her, and didn't just want a one-night stand? She was an idiot, and whether she wanted to admit it or not, she was a slut. She should have expected this.

But it still hurt. Seeing that yet another guy was gone in the morning and she was yet again alone…it hurt.

But Dean wasn't hurting one bit. In fact, he hadn't felt this good in a long time. The demon walked out to the stolen car where Crowley waited with his hands stuffed in his pockets, whistling cheerily. Crowley watched Dean approach, seeing how Dean stood taller and walked cockily, the after-sex glow not having worn off yet. In the Knight of Hell's mind, he was the greatest thing on earth in that moment.

"I suppose that went well?" Crowley sighed as Dean opened the car door and got into the passenger seat.

The demon smirked cockily. "Oh, yeah. I hadn't had a one night stand in _years_, Crowley! Remind me why the hell I gave that up?"

_You gave that up to devote your life to a beautiful, brave, clever, tough woman who loved you enough to die and go to hell for you. A woman I took you away from._

Crowley pushed those thoughts away. There was no use in feeling bad for what he'd done to Sam and Julie. It was irreversible. Dean Winchester, or at least the old one, was gone. Hopefully, Sam and Julie would realize that and move on with their lives. They had each other; they would survive.

The demon in the seat next to him stretched his arms and sighed. "Alright, Crowley. Seeing how great that was, I say we go find another bar to hit up, find another desperate slut I can bang."

Crowley blinked, surprised. "Well, there is the issue of it being almost nine o'clock in the morning." _And the fact that there's a woman out there right now, probably still sobbing over you, while you plan on going around banging every slut that comes your way._

Damn. Crowley really had been spending too much time with humans. Their morals and judgmental ways were rubbing off on him. If Dean wanted to sleep with lots of women, who was Crowley to judge or stop him? If Dean wanted to kill or steal or rape or torture, who was Crowley to stand in his way? This was Dean Winchester now, a demon, a Knight of Hell! It was just going to take a little getting used to, a Dean with no morals or self-hatred weighing him down.

"Fine," Dean sighed. "So, we don't go to a bar. I don't really care what we do. Just as long as it's fun." Dean frowned. "What do you demons do for fun anyway?"

"Well, what you just did," Crowley admitted. "Others torture or kill or make deals on souls. Really…it's your choice. You want to go kill a small village, or get someone to sell their soul, or just get wasted, it's all up to you."

Dean thought about it for a minute. Then he grinned. "You know what? I say Vegas. Gambling, drinking, lots of slutty women, plenty of people willing to sell their souls…demon heaven, right?"

Crowley smirked despite himself. "Sure, why not." He started to drive, but suddenly the keys flew out of the ignition and into Dean's hand. Crowley blinked as the Knight of Hell grinned cockily.

"Oh, by the way, I figured out how to do that," he smirked. "And one more thing: whether we're going to Vegas or hell, I don't give a damn—I'm driving."

* * *

><p>Julie couldn't sleep.<p>

Everyone else had drifted off a couple hours ago, even Sam. When she had gone downstairs to check on him a few minutes ago, Sam was passed out on the couch. She had almost smiled, seeing how much younger and more relaxed Sam looked in sleep, but she couldn't force her mouth to do anything but frown. James now slept in the guest room which had once been Dean's, but her old bedroom was still empty, so Jasper had set her up in there.

She hated being in here, though. Looking around, all she saw was him. There was the mirror that she had looked in every morning as she got ready to go downstairs and see Dean again. There was the closet, full of clothes that he'd seen her in, clothes he'd complimented, clothes he'd taken off of her. The bed they'd spent several nights in together. There was even a picture of the two of them together on the nightstand, and Julie couldn't look down at their smiling faces without tearing up.

How could he?! She kept thinking that over and over. How could he? How could Dean leave her like this? How could he do this to her, to Sam, to everyone who cared about him? How could he just be gone?!

Julie sat down on the bed and hugged her knees to her chest. If Dean were here, he would wrap his arms around her and kiss the top of her head and tell her everything would be okay. He would hold her and say soothing things until the tears dried. And just to hear his voice, to feel his touch…that would be enough. Everything would be okay, if he was just here now. Julie squeezed her eyes shut and wished with all her might that a miracle would happen and he would appear here with her.

It was a stupid, childish thing to do. She knew when she opened her eyes, there would be no Dean. But it still hurt when she opened her eyes and found herself alone again.

Julie thought about praying. She had prayed three times already, to any and all angels, begging them to help her. No one had come to her aid, not even Cas. God, poor Cas! That angel had loved Dean more than he loved anyone, and he must be grieving as much as Sam and Julie, but for some reason, he wouldn't let them try to help him or comfort him. He was just burying himself in his work, focusing on helping his fellow angels, so that he wouldn't have to think about how Dean was…

God, _stop it_! Why couldn't she stop crying? It was ridiculous! She was twenty-eight years old! She had known far more than her fair share of loss in her life, and she had endured ten years of _hell_, for god's sake! So why couldn't she stop weeping and crying over this one man like a child?!

Two years ago, Julie had felt insecure. She had never really truly felt like she had loved a man. She was twenty-six years old, and she had been in several relationships, but none of them had left her feeling like that man was _the one_. And, not for lack of trying, she couldn't seem to find a man she could love. She was beginning to wonder if there was something very wrong with her, and she just wasn't meant to be in love. She had wanted nothing more than to just find a good man she could love and settle down and have a life with. They could have a nice little house and nice, normal jobs. They could have a little boy and a little girl, and they could have their own little adventure, raising a family. No monsters, no demons, no Knights of Hell or Marks of Cain. She just wanted to be happy and in love.

And then he came along. And he made her happy like no one ever had. And she loved him like she had never loved anyone and would probably never love anyone ever again. Julie loved Dean.

What did it matter if he couldn't give her that other, normal life? What did it matter if he was a broken mess, and he would probably never be made whole again? What did it matter if being with him put her in danger? So what if he got her killed? So what if he broke her heart? At least he was able to get her heart in the first place!

It was awful. It was cruel and unfair and awful, but the more Julie thought about it, the more she realized he really was the one for her. He was the man she had waited twenty-seven years for, the love that would make her whole, her greatest adventure. And she hadn't even gotten two whole years with him before…

"Dammit, Dean!" she cried suddenly, surprising herself. "Don't do this," she sobbed. "Please, I…"

But she couldn't even get out the words "love you," through her tears. It didn't matter anyway. He couldn't hear her. It didn't matter that she loved him and needed him so damn much. He was gone. Her Dean was gone.

Eventually, Julie got her emotions under control. But when the sorrow passed, it left her so exhausted she was finally able to sleep. She passed out on the bed, not bothering to change into pajamas or even get under the covers. But she found no reprieve in sleep.

_First, Julie dreamed that she was in a dark forest, and she was on a hunt, and a monster had taken Dean. She was running through the forest, chasing it, trying to find him before it was too late. She could hear Dean crying out in pain ahead of her, and she would scream his name, but no matter how fast she ran, she could never reach him, never get to him in time to save him._

_Then the dream changed, and Julie was back in the home where she and Dean had once lived in Illinois. At first, she was relieved to be out of that dark forest. But when she stepped out of the house and into the street, her neighbors were gathered out in the lawn in dark clothes._

_Her old best friend, Elaine, stepped forward and touched Julie's arm. "I'm so sorry, Julie," she said sadly._

_"__What? Julie asked, bewildered._

_"__Dean was a good man," Dean's friend from work, Greg, said firmly. "He'll be missed."_

_"__What are you…?" Julie started to ask, but then she saw him. He was lying several yards away, at the end of the driveway, his body bloody and beaten and stiff and cold. Julie wailed Dean's name and ran to him, but before she could reach him, the dream got ever worse._

_Suddenly, she was in a dark, hot place that smelled of blood and burnt flesh and every awful stench imaginable. The air was hot and thick and it choked her, settling on her skin like a thick, poisonous fog. Julie's throat closed up and panic threatened to overwhelm her as she recognized where she was._

_She was in hell, and there was a familiar torture device in front of her, known affectionately by the demons as the rack. A poor victim was hanging suspended in the air by vicious hook in his shoulders and thighs, chains holding his limbs out. His blood dripped down into the nothingness below him, and his burnt, shredded chest heaved as he tried to get in one good breath. Every inch of him was cut or burnt or bruised almost beyond recognition, but somehow Julie knew it was him._

_"__Dean," Julie whispered in a horrified voice._

_A demon appeared before him and sank another hook into his gut. The poor, tortured soul whimpered, and the demon chuckled, "Oh, come on, Dean. You can do better than that. Why don't you give me a real scream, beg me to stop? If you cry for me, I won't set you on fire today."_

_The tortured soul of the man she loved didn't reply, and the demon was suddenly holding a blowtorch. "You asked for it," the demon shrugged._

_"__No, Alistair, wait-" Dean croaked, panicking, but the demon didn't care. The next second, Dean was on fire, and he was screaming, but not as much as Julie, and-_

"_Julie_! You've got to stop screaming, you'll wake the others!"

Julie opened her eyes and found herself staring up at Sam. He was sitting on the bed next to her, looking concerned, and Julie realized what must have happened. She often had nightmares, and she wasn't surprised that she was already having them about Dean now that he was gone. She hadn't had nightmares the past two nights because she'd been so drunk she couldn't stay conscious, but now…

Slowly, Julie regained her composure. Her breathing and heart rate slowed, and she sat up. She was still trembling slightly, but at least she wasn't watching Dean be tortured in hell. Sam had mentioned the name Alastair once as the master torturer in hell, the one that had Dean for forty years. She must have remembered that name. Alastair was dead, so he wasn't torturing Dean, but that didn't mean that some other demon wasn't…

No. She couldn't go down that path. She had just gotten calm. Julie put her head in her hands, and Sam sighed.

"You too, huh?" he murmured.

"What do you have nightmares about?" Julie asked flatly.

"Mostly him. I watch him die again. Or I watch him die a different way, ripped apart by hellhounds, or…" Sam stopped and took a deep breath, steadying himself. "Sometimes I see him in hell. Is that what you saw?"

"Yeah," Julie whispered. There was a long silence, and then she suddenly asked desperately, "Is it going to get better?"

"A little," Sam admitted. "It won't be as fresh. But it's never not going to hurt. You're never going to be okay again. At least, I'm not."

For a long time, the two sat in silence next to each other. Eventually, Sam suggested Julie try to sleep again, even though he knew she wouldn't be able to after that nightmare. But as he got up and reached the door, she asked softly, "Sam?"

He stopped and turned to face her. "Yeah?"

Julie looked down and took a deep breath. "I know it's stupid, but…I can't…I can't be alone right now. Can you just…stay with me?"

Sam couldn't quite figure out what emotions were going through him in that moment, so he ignored them. The point was, Julie needed him. And he needed to not be alone tonight either.

"Of course," Sam said gently, walking over to her.

There was an awkward moment of Sam being unsure what she wanted him to do. She moved over so he could lie down on the bed. For a moment, they lay stiffly next to each other, but then Julie sighed and moved closer to Sam, settling in next to him and hugging him tightly. He hugged her back and held her for a long time until she slowly relaxed.

After a while, Julie was able to drift off, with one of Sam's arms wrapped around her and her head on his chest, listening to his heart beat. Once Julie was asleep, Sam carefully brushed a couple curls out of her face and studied her as she slept.

There was a time in his life where Sam would want nothing more than to have Julie fall asleep in his arms. But this was nothing like what he had dreamed of. This was hell. His life was hell, because Dean wasn't in it. It didn't matter how happy this would have once made him. Nothing mattered, except that Dean was dead.

Sam wondered why he had said yes. It probably wasn't wise to be sleeping in the same bed as his brother's girlfriend two days after his death, especially since Sam had once loved her. But Julie had needed him, and if he was being honest, he needed her.

And there was something Dean had said, right before he knocked Sam out and got himself killed. He had asked Sam to take care of Julie. And Sam would do that, even if he _didn't_ care about her, which he definitely did, for his brother's sake.

Sam would take care of Julie, and she would take care of him. And, while Dean's death would always hurt, and neither of them would ever probably be happy or whole again…they would be okay, after a while. Together, the two of them would be able to survive.


End file.
